Thursday, July 8, 2010

Prezza “Sidelined” Into the Lords

So it’s Baron Prezza of Kingston-on-Hull. And more importantly Lady Prescott too. A quiet and subdued Prescott has just taken his oath. The millionaire didn’t look very happy during the whole process.

Must have been all that “flummery”…

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Exclusive : Prezza to Run for Labour Treasurer

The very idea of John Precott being in the Lords is one of the strongest arguments for reforming it. Though if that wasn’t enough, Guido understands the wheels are in motion for him to stand as the replacement of the newly elected Jack Dromey as Treasurer of the Labour Party.

Given this oaf somehow managed to reach the giddy heights of Deputy Prime Minister, he shouldn’t have too much problem sewing up this internal job. After Labour’s notoriously dodgy past of illegal donations, having such a competent and shrewd man liaising with the Electoral Commission can only be an improvement. Bad news for those who hoped John Prescott would just disappear into obscurity once in the Lords and spend all day at lunch. Guido has a feeling this is not going to end well though.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Prezza Avoids Punching Protester

A fat man dressed up as John Prescott has ended up nicked after he followed the original  around while he was campaigning in the East End. The heavies were called in and the police led the alleged Tory council candidate away.

Sadly before Prescott had the opportunity to thump him.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Why Did You Join the Labour Party?

John Prescott is Tweeting followers asking

Why did you all join #Labour? Personal experiences? Shared values? Same vision of a progressive Britain? Let us know!

Guido is offering a copy of The Big Red Book of New Labour Sleaze to the most amusing answer (in character) for different Labour figures.

Prezza : For the sex and expenses.
Blair : To conquer Mesopotamia.

Well, you can probably do better…

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Prezza Loses BBC Battle Over Taxpayers’ Alliance

The BBC have replied to Prezza over his demand to the BBC that

the TaxPayers’ Alliance’s [sic] should now be referred to on air as “a group with close links to the Conservative Party” or some similar on-air clarification.

The BBC’s Helen Boaden has now written back to reject Prezza’s demand:

I do not think it would be accurate or fair to describe it on air, as you suggest, as ‘a group with close links to the Conservative Party.’

Prezza is Twittering that this means “we’ve had some real success”How?

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Prezza Becomes China Apologist

Chinese culture venerates the wisdom of the aged, that must be why they made John Prescott a Professor of Climate Change at a Xiamen University.  It surely can’t be for his grasp of thermo-dynamics or theoretical climatology.  All the honours and flattery have secured his services as a Sino-apologist, a role in which he follows in the footsteps of Ted Heath, who combined his latter years of sulking with making excuses for the Chinese, greatly enriching himself in the process.

Guido has no idea what the terms of his honourary position are, so far he has only declared copious hospitality from the Chinese regime.  This has seemingly secured his trademark one-sided campaigning belligerence on their behalf in return.  You would have thought China’s blocking of a deal in Copenhagen would have soured Professor Prezza the climate change campaigner’s relationship with the Chinese.  Not a bit, he even wrote a letter to the Guardian loyally pointing out that the Copenhagen Conference failing  was all America’s fault, despite NGOs and EU negotiators squarely blaming China.  Guido will bet that a letter to the Guardian has never before been reported favourably in the Chinese People’s Daily…

This morning a British citizen was executed by the Chinese.  David Miliband had led an international campaign to get the sentence commuted, even Gordon Brown pleaded for clemency.  So did John Prescott use his campaigning skills and contacts at the highest level of the Chinese regime to intervene? 

No, not a tweet was heard from him…

UPDATE : Prezza managed to mess up a Chinese wedding. Have a laugh watching the wedding video hereAt least he didn’t grope a bridesmaid…

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Prezza Descended from “Incestuous Inbreds” Shock

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Quote of the Day

John Prescott says of Harriet Harman

“I think the deputy leadership role is for going out and campaigning…I suppose, if I was being honest about it, I think too much of the emphasis has been on female rights, which I have supported all my life, and we’re not getting other messages across. Most of it is about the equality issue. It is very important, but it is not our biggest campaigning issue, whatever they say about it.”

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Professor Prezza’s Porkies

professor-prezzaqProfessor Prezza is very excitedly Twittering about the government’s announcement that they plan to do some pump priming  on the home building front.  John Healey announced today that 47 councils will share in  a grant of £127 million to build what amounts to about 30 homes per council.

new-home-millionThey will be completed by 2011.  So Prezza is, in a sense, wrong when he tweets that you won’t get this from a Tory government.  He is also wrong in the wider sense, after all in’t it under the Tories that the most council homes have been built?  Harold Macmillan promised to build 300,000 a year and ended up building a million.  A building programme unmatched by Labour. In fact Labour this year are actually knocking down 3,000 homes.

Professor Prezza needs to study a bit more history…

Friday, May 29, 2009

Rosie’s Sound-Proofed Bedroom on Expenses

Today Guido learnt that the Minister for Work and Pensions, Rosie Winterton, claimed close to the maximum allowance for second homes – including soundproofing her bedroom. The MP, John Prescott’s former mistress, claimed for the work in February 2007, before the fees office reduced the payment to £3,800 after refusing to pay for the use of acoustic felt and wool slabs.

The full claim was for ‘soundproofing of bedroom wall and redecoration to bedroom, bathroom, living room, kitchen, staircase’.  What is she was so keen on us not hearing about?


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