PM: “Extraordinary” Naz Shah Still Has Labour Whip

Dave says she is guilty of “racism” and must be suspended…

Who Is Asking The Questions Today?

pmqs chat

Q1 Mims Davies (Eastleigh)

Q2 Byron Davies (Gower)

Q3 Amanda Milling (Cannock Chase)

Q4 Ben Howlett (Bath)

Q5 Tom Tugendhat (Tonbridge and Malling)

Q6 Drew Hendry (Inverness, Nairn, Badenoch and Strathspey)

Q7 Suella Fernandes (Fareham)

Q8 Mike Wood (Dudley South)

Q9 John Stevenson (Carlisle)

Q10 Nigel Adams (Selby and Ainsty)

Q11 Mr Ben Bradshaw (Exeter)

Q12 Marion Fellows (Motherwell and Wishaw)

Q13 Liz McInnes (Heywood and Middleton)

Q14 Judith Cummins (Bradford South)

Comments in the comments please…

Chancellor Rasputin Lurks in the Shadows

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And so today saw the Chancellor grace us with his first PMQs appearance for almost a month. Such reticence from the man is common these days. George Osborne is becoming increasingly Rasputin-eqsue. In the shadows he lurks, wielding power over the Tsar, dripping poison in his ear and making outlandish predictions for the future. “I’ll eradicate the debt and cut the deficit” he’ll whisper, “each family will be four thousand three hundred pounds worse off if we leave” he’ll hiss. And when his untruths and false promises are questioned, he retreats from view, leaving the ruler to lumber in on his behalf to placate the angry and ignored. Of course any man who knows his Russian history knows how this story ends. Old Rasputin was poisoned, shot, bludgeoned, and drowned by those angered by his influence, with the entire saga only further weakening the regime he was so bound up with and hastening its collapse. One wonders how long is till Osborne, like the Russian, washes up on the banks of the Thames, peppered with bullet holes but still faintly breathing, sighing “long… term… economic… plan”.

Onto proceedings. Nigel Adams got things underway by praising the “dignity and grace” of her Maj ahead of the big Nine O tomorrow, a day that promised to be “a proper knees up” at the very least. The PM reiterated the Selby MP’s sentiments, before laying a trap for his opposite number. “I know the whole country and the whole house”, Cameron innocently opined, “will want to join me in saying, Long may she reign o’er us”. Corbyn wouldn’t play ball. “Thank you Mr. Speaker”, he replied plainly, “I am also looking forward to wishing her a happy birthday tomorrow, notably missing out any celebration of the continuation of her reign. In other words, have a good one Liz, but don’t have too many more.

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Cameron’s Brutal Attack on Khan

At PMQs Cameron listed the nine times Sadiq Khan has shared a platform with Suliman Gani, as reported on Guido. Corbyn shouted “disgraceful” and Labour MPs howled “racist“. As the PM says, the point is not that Khan once shared a stage with an extremist once by accident, he did it over and over again…

Who Is Asking The Questions Today?

pmqs chat

Q1 Nigel Adams (Selby and Ainsty)

Q2 Geraint Davies (Swansea West)

Q3 Mr Christopher Chope (Christchurch)

Q4 Sue Hayman (Workington)

Q5 Jonathan Edwards (Carmarthen East and Dinefwr)

Q6 Kevin Foster (Torbay)

Q7 Matt Warman (Boston and Skegness)

Q8 John Spellar (Warley)

Q9 Imran Hussain (Bradford East)

Q10 Christopher Pincher (Tamworth)

Q11 Stella Creasy (Walthamstow)

Q12 Helen Goodman (Bishop Auckland)

Q13 Meg Hillier (Hackney South and Shoreditch)

Q14 Charlotte Leslie (Bristol North West)

Comments in the comments please…

SKETCH: Unnamed Prime Minister in Slippery Threesome

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“All that rebranding, all that time and all that effort and what was the point. What was the bloody point. The single biggest endeavour of my career has been to rebrand the Party, and for what? For nothing. The Left still think I’m a heartless, tax-dodging Tory bastard. I hugged huskies in the Arctic. The Arctic for Christ’s sake. I don’t even like the cold, or huskies for that matter. They’re terrifying. I almost froze my todger off up there detoxifying this party. And that’s just the physical ordeals. What about the countless personal embarrassments I endured? Having to pick a football team and then suffer the indignity of forgetting it in front of everyone like a malfunctioning robot, or ride a pedal bike to work everyday for a year in £3.99 polyester tracksuit bottoms, or touring the most Chlamydia infested recesses of the North East encouraging people to embrace the scallywag Asbos that loiter there. I even flew easyJet. But what good did it do me? I’m being hammered from the Left and screwed from the Right. In fact I’ve got more slippery pricks trying to do me in than there are in Elton’s paddling pool. When I leave this prison of a job I’m going to go full Blair and get a yacht and I’m going to sit in it in my pants watching Top Gear. And not the BBC version either, the proper one, with Clarkson in it. Oh yeah and I’m going to murder Stelios for all the easyJet flights I’ve had to sit through before I hop on my learjet to St. Tropez to drink Bollinger out of the bottle and eat caviar by the kilogram. And wear white tie and tails, oh yes”.

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Dave Thinks He’ll Oversee Brexit Negotiations

This is optimistic…

Who Is Asking The Questions Today?

pmqs chat

Q1 Wendy Morton (Aldridge-Brownhills)

Q2 Mr Douglas Carswell (Clacton)

Q3 Mr Alistair Carmichael (Orkney and Shetland)

Q4 Stephen Timms (East Ham)

Q5 Jenny Chapman (Darlington)

Q6 Andrew Stephenson (Pendle)

Q7 Caroline Lucas (Brighton, Pavilion)

Q8 Jesse Norman (Hereford and South Herefordshire)

Q9 Jo Stevens (Cardiff Central)

Q10 Neil Carmichael (Stroud)

Q11 Chris Green (Bolton West)

Q12 Dr Rupa Huq (Ealing Central and Acton)

Q13 Steven Paterson (Stirling)

Q14 Catherine West (Hornsey and Wood Green)

Q15 Nigel Huddleston (Mid Worcestershire)

Comments in the comments please…

SKETCH: Cameron’s Theatre, Corbyn’s Reality

gallery-guido

And so after a week punctuated by dissent and disquiet, it began. First the formalities commemorating Brussels, giving the Prime Minister a chance to do his serious face by furrowing his brow and talking slowly, taking great care to enunciate every word.[…]

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Corbyn Yells “Disgraceful” at Cameron For Raising Anti-Semitism

This is a terrible look for Corbyn. As Cameron raised the importance of tackling anti-Semitism, the Labour leader furiously and repeatedly shouted “disgraceful” at the PM. Read Guido’s story that reignited Labour’s race row here[…]

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John Woodcock’s Deleted PMQs Summary

You can probably call that “hostile”…[…]

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Who Is Asking The Questions Today?

pmqs chat

Q1 Sir Peter Bottomley (Worthing West)

Q2 Mike Freer (Finchley and Golders Green)

Q3 Mr Alistair Carmichael (Orkney and Shetland)

Q4 Stuart Blair Donaldson (West Aberdeenshire and Kincardine)

Q5 Dr Rupa Huq (Ealing Central and Acton)

Q6 David T. C. Davies (Monmouth)

Q7 Amanda Milling (Cannock Chase)

Q8 Mr Peter Bone (Wellingborough)

Q9 Michael Tomlinson (Mid Dorset and North Poole)

Q10 Patrick Grady (Glasgow North)

Q11 Richard Arkless (Dumfries and Galloway)

Q12 Rushanara Ali (Bethnal Green and Bow)

Q13 Andrew Stephenson (Pendle)

Q14 Ms Tasmina Ahmed-Sheikh (Ochil and South Perthshire)

Q15 Mr Douglas Carswell (Clacton)

Comments in the comments please…[…]

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See Who is Asking the Questions Today

pmqs chat

Oral Questions to the Prime Minister

Q1 Karen Lumley (Redditch)

Q2 Michael Fabricant (Lichfield)

Q3 Byron Davies (Gower)

Q4 Ian C. Lucas (Wrexham) 

Q5 Dr James Davies (Vale of Clwyd) 

Q6 Kevin Barron (Rother Valley) 

Q7 Richard Graham (Gloucester) 

Q8 Ronnie Cowan (Inverclyde) 

Q9 Callum McCaig (Aberdeen South)

Q10 Mr Ranil Jayawardena (North East Hampshire) 

Q11 Kevin Hollinrake (Thirsk and Malton) 

Q12 Andrea Jenkyns (Morley and Outwood) 

Q13 Stephen Metcalfe (South Basildon and East Thurrock) 

Q14 Steve Double (St Austell and Newquay)

Q15 Sir Simon Burns (Chelmsford) 

Comments in the comments…[…]

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Hundred, Not Out

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So Jeremy Corbyn reached his century. Today he asked his hundredth PMQ question. It feels like so many more, doesn’t it? The awkward shift from local radio phone-in host (“Claire from Nuneaton has a question…”) to floundering supply teacher (“It’s not funny!”) to what Nye Bevan would have called a “desiccated calculating machine” with a muddled spewing out of obscure data.[…]

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Who Is Asking The Questions Today?

pmqs chat

Q1 Karin Smyth (Bristol South)

Q2 Richard Burgon (Leeds East)

Q3 Julie Elliott (Sunderland Central)

Q4 Catherine McKinnell (Newcastle upon Tyne North)

Q5 Mr Khalid Mahmood (Birmingham, Perry Barr)

Q6 Dr Roberta Blackman-Woods (City of Durham)

Q7 James Berry (Kingston and Surbiton)

Q8 Mark Spencer (Sherwood)

Q9 Andrew Stephenson (Pendle)

Q10 Anne Marie Morris (Newton Abbot)

Q11 Martyn Day (Linlithgow and East Falkirk)

Q12 Mr Ranil Jayawardena (North East Hampshire)

Q13 Jack Dromey (Birmingham, Erdington)

Q14 Jim Dowd (Lewisham West and Penge)

Q15 James Cartlidge (South Suffolk)

Comments in the comments please…[…]

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Corbyn’s Naked Pole Dancing*

gallery-guido

Today we discovered the difference between a threat and a promise.

For years we’ve been promised that a calmer, more serious House during Prime Minister’s Questions would be good for the whole country. Less ya-boo and more speaking up for constituents with real problems.[…]

+ READ MORE +



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