“Look,” said Johann, his dark eyes welling up with emotion. “I can talk to you about why what happened in my life happened. But I just think that’s a way of trying to invite sympathy, and that would be weaselly.

Thinking this was the moment, Guido leaned in closer to the disgraced former Indy columnist, waiting for that magic word to come from Hari’s lips:

“If you tell a detailed personal story about yourself, you’re inherently asking people to sympathise with you, and actually I don’t think people should be sympathetic to me. I’m ashamed of what I did. I did some things that were really nasty and cruel.”

“I’m very reluctant to go into a personal narrative and give the why,’ the disgraced columnist sighed. “Most people restrain their self-aggrandising and cruel impulses, and I failed to. I failed badly. I think when you do that, when you harm people, you should shut up, go away and reflect on what happened.”

Or say sorry, thought the interviewer…

“Going on about myself would just be arrogant and actually repeating being nasty, and that’s what I’m trying not to be. When you fuck up, you should privately reckon with the harm you have caused and you should pay a big price.”

And apologise perhaps, but still no…

Of course Johann Hari didn’t say any of this to Guido, but to Decca Aitkin of the Guardian.

See attribution isn’t so hard after all.

Apparently Hari is back promoting his new novel about drug addiction.

So much for shutting up and going away to reflect on what happened…

“A significant inaccuracy, misleading statement or distortion once recognised must be corrected, promptly and with due prominence, and – where appropriate – an apology published.” That is the view of Hacked Off, who have just been censured by the Advertising Standards Authority for misleading the public. An ASA investigation found a Hacked Off advert endorsed by celebs including Benedict Cumberbatch and Gary Lineker “breached CAP Code (Edition 12) rules 3.1 and 3.3 (Misleading advertising)” and was “likely to mislead”. Yet, despite this significant inaccuracy, misleading statement and distortion, there is no correction on the Hacked Off website this morning and no apology published. Instead, they are whinging that the decision was “political”, a unlikely story giving the leanings of the ASA. What would Leveson say?

Not only does the taxpayer fork out £67,000 a year to keep Diane Abbott in the style to which she has become accustomed, her salary is also subsidised by the licence fee payer to the tune of £110,000. As Guido revealed in yesterday’s Sun on Sunday, Diane has raked in a six figure sum from Auntie Beeb for her appearance fees since April 2007. Despite the BBC Trust admitting two years ago that Abbott was overpaid. You can see the full breakdown of her BBC cash via the BanTheBBC blog here. That means Diane has trousered nearly £600,000 from the British public in the last seven years…

Peter Preston points out that the recent announcement from Times Newspapers Limited (London) that 51% of revenue was coming from print and digital sales seemed to boast how digital subscriptions were soaring; “it may equally have been demonstrating how far ad revenue had slumped”. This is why Buzzfeed is valued at more than The Times…

Can he be Sy-rious? Disgraced dick pic MP Brooks Newmark has told friends “Brooks of Damascus is back” and that he will return to the ravaged country after 2015. Also in Guido’s column today:

• Dave’s Costly Long-Term Optometric Plan – new glasses from posh Chelsea store

• Government cuts hit Christmas trees… so Avid Javid privatises them at DCMS
• Hackney moonlighter Diane Abbott rakes in £600,000 from the British public since 2007!
• Sir Keir Starmer is Alastair Campbell’s next great hope
• Nigel Farage plans a tell-all book after the election

Click here to read Guido’s column for free with a free 30-day trial…

A mass influx of migrant fleas flooding the Daily Express newsroom has swept panic across the paper. Journalists were in chaos last night as hundreds of the blood-scrounging bugs descended past lapse security controls and arrived in their besieged office. Concerned Arts editor Clair Woodward vowed to launch a crackdown on newsroom filth after workers reported “having to wear Deet to the office”:

“Due to the amount of complaints about fleas, I have called in a chap from the City of London environmental health who will hopefully visit us  pronto and some of us might get to stop having to wear Deet to the office… nothing can be done until the culture of leaving food around in the office stops – flea-carrying rodents won’t take bait if there’s half a sandwich left in the bin next to your desk. Like our bitten colleagues, I’d really like to see and end to this once and for all, but I don’t want Mr Environmental Health to come to the office and tell us again that we’re not helping ourselves. Gestapo-like, I have noticed that food leftovers and packaging are still not being put in the swing-top bins, and packets of sugar (mice love it – some stole a friend of mine’s dentures she’d left on the bedside table as they had a bit of Cadbury’s Éclair stuck to them) left on tables, and food in packages mice can eat through in drawers.”

Experts last night warned the flea terror could see house prices rise by as much as 0%…