Wednesday, December 18, 2013

The Hair Apparent: Bald Boris Update

Forget airport capacity expansion, Boris needs a hair extension. Spinners do everything they can to try avoid the Mayor’s thinning hair from being seen, but they did not do very well on Channel 4 News last night:

Will his chances of reaching No.10 recede with his hairline?

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

WATCH: Boris Fails IQ Test

Well this morning’s Call Boris on LBC could hardly have gone any worse. Who could have predicted that Nick Ferrari would ambush him with an IQ test? Not the Mayor, it seems:

He didn’t fare much better on tube ticket prices either:

No one could have seen that coming.

Monday, December 2, 2013

Lammy’s London Policy is Off the Rails

Fiercely bright London Mayor hopeful David Lammy has come up with an ingenious plan to help London’s commuters while on a fact-finding mission to Paris:

Guido cannot envisage a single problem with this plan. He’s sure Lammy has fully costed the proposal to widen and heighten all of those deep tube tunnels that would have to double in size.

Monday, November 25, 2013

Boris 2.0

Could we see another posh blond bombshell replace Boris Johnson? As Guido revealed in yesterday’s Sun column, TV adventurer Ben Fogle says he wants to swap Countryfile for the city as Mayor of London. And with Seb Coe, Alan Sugar, Eddie Izzard et al it’s not as if there aren’t enough celebs considering their options.

“I have my own aspirations in politics. I’ve only just realised rather naively today that Eddie Izzard is going for London Mayor. If I ever went into politics, which my wife thinks is a ludicrous idea, London Mayor strikes me as the most likely I think I might have a go at. I think it is more achievable than other areas.”

The Navy officer, turned gentleman traveller, turned hero of Animal Clinic does not exactly endear himself to his party leader:

“There are lots of Tory policies I like but I don’t entirely like where the Tories are right now. I’m not the biggest fan of David Cameron. I believe you should be what you are, not pretending to be someone you are not.”

A bit like Boris…

Monday, September 23, 2013

Bald Boris Update

The clearest sign yet BoJo is going bald:

Maybe he’s been pulling his hair out over the latest Boris bus blunder.

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Boris Comes Out Against Free School Meals Expansion
Mayor Rules Out Third Term in City Hall

Speaking to Guido after his speech at the Institute of Directors this morning, the Mayor of London publicly criticised plans to massively expand free school meals for children:

“I tell you, it would be very easy to say, I think.. I think that it’s real you know errr I, what I think is there should be compulsion to eat the school meal, but I am in no means against getting parents who can pay for to pay for it.”

He added, “I have no problem with the concept of dinner money.” When Guido pushed him on his position, asking directly whether rich parents should be subsidised, the Mayor replied: “No well… Look I’m sure the government have a very good reason for doing it.” Quite what that is remains a mystery to many Tories…

Coincidently, the Boris ruled out running for a third term in City Hall:

“I can rule that out, I can rule everything out”.

But then, that’s what Ken said…

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Diane Abbott Talks Up London Mayor Bid

As if Gorgeous George was not bad enough, Diane Abbott is flirting with a run at London mayor. She has been coy about the possibility before, today telling Progress why she would be a choice candidate. For some reason she is against Labour’s plan for a primary, insisting “it doesn’t make any sense”. Obviously not because of how it would affect her bid.

“I wouldn’t rule it out… [London is] much more interested in and much more positive about diversity and multiculturalism. The political consequences of austerity [will be key]. Londoners don’t want a party hack. Big cities never want a party hack. They want someone who’s independent, who will stand up for them.”

Divide and rule…

Thursday, August 8, 2013

George Galloway “Exploring” Bid for Mayor of London
“I Can Win, Yeah”

That well known Londoner George Galloway is preparing a bid for Mayor of London in 2016. In an interview with the Artist Taxi Driver, the MP for Bradford coughed:

“I have a committee exploring it now. It’s a shrunken field – Boris Johnson won’t be running. Ken Linvingstone won’t be running, I would never have run against Ken Livingstone as he’s a very old friend of mine. Labour will run Ken Livingstone minus, the Tories will field Boris Johnson minus… I can win, yeah.”

Guido is not sure Boris would fancy a job swap…

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

WATCH: Loony Unite Militants Jump on Boris’ Car

Boris’ driver delicately negotiates a Unite ambush over in Stanford-le-Hope. Could have gone much worse…

Via Your Thurrock.

Monday, July 15, 2013

WATCH: Boris Blows Crosby’s Cover

Cornered about his old campaign manager, Boris recounted Lynton Crosby’s advice to stop talking about airports earlier:

In an interview about airports, naturally.


Seen Elsewhere

Labour Spell New Adviser’s Name Wrong | ITV
Dave Stung by Jellyfish | Sun
City Minister’s Inheritance Tax Dodging Trusts | Indy
What I Would Have Done if I was Sarah Wollaston | Iain Dale
Boris is an Epic Europhile | Louise Mensch
Warsi Got PM to Confront “Secular Fundamentalism” | Fraser Nelson
Guardian April Fools Apology | Press Gazette
Jenni Russell and Her Child’s Godfather, Ed Miliband | Breitbart
Labour’s Left and Right are Growing Restive | Staggers
Corrupt, Incompetent UN Has No Right to Lecture Us | Dan Hannan
Mirror’s Lazy Lie | Guardian


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Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”



orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?


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