Tuesday, October 7, 2014

WATCH: Have I Got News For You on ‘Sophie’

Monday, October 6, 2014

WATCH: Bercow Insists He’s Not Shortest Speaker Ever

Bercow has been to Australia to speak to a half-empty room about democracy in the digital age. As Guido revealed in yesterday’s Sun column, he began his speech with a reference to “one quite sensitive matter which even as straight-talking Australians I hazard a guess your natural courtesy will disincline you to raise with me directly… that is the sensitive matter of… height.”

“It has been bruted in some of the more down-market parts of the British press that I am the shortest man ever to be Speaker… In the fairly confident expectation that there are some people who like me are vertically challenged in this audience, I say very, very explicitly, there’s nothing wrong with being short. We short people should stick together. We may be short but we may also be judged to be perfectly formed. In any case, facts are facts. I am short. I am 51 years old and remain short, and given the known impact of the ageing process upon physiognomy, the overwhelming likelihood is that I will become inexorably and irrevocably shorter still.”

Bercow went on to tell his antipodean audience that he is not the shortest Speaker ever, that particular achievement went to Sir John Bussy – Commons Speaker in 1399 – though only because he was beheaded by Henry IV. He concluded “whatever else happens to me, I am not likely to lose my head”. Watch til the end for the Speaker’s friendly acknowledgement of one audience member, a certain Carol Mills…

Friday, October 3, 2014

WATCH: Telly Focus Group Slam Ed’s Conference

The stars of Gogglebox, Channel 4’s televised focus group, have had their say on Ed Miliband’s performance at Labour conference. Dom and Steph in Kent were unimpressed with his position on English votes for English laws, Brighton hairdressers Chris and Stephen physically recoiled at his “together” soundbite, while mum and dad Andrew and Carolyn blamed Gordon Brown for “costing the Labour Party dearly”.

A resounding success across all sections of society, then…

Thursday, October 2, 2014

Shapps Confirms PM Will Campaign in Clacton

Many thought the PM would want to avoid the UKIP landslide. Apparently not…

In case you missed the Guy News special report during conference, it’s not looking good for the Tories on the Essex coast:

Guido is not sure a visit from Dave will do much to turn that around…

Sunday, September 28, 2014

LISTEN: Mark Reckless’ Voicemail to Grant Shapps

When he went on the Sunday Politics this morning, Mark Reckless probably didn’t expect he would be played a voicemail he left for Grant Shapps on Friday promising to campaign for the Tories in Birmingham. The following day he defected to UKIP.

“You can’t discuss these things in advance,” says Reckless…

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Miliband ‘Forgets’ to Mention the Deficit Two More Times

Jon Snow’s bruising interview with Ed Miliband last night is well worth a watch. The Labour leader resembled a human punchbag as Snow forensically tore his speech apart bit by bit. When asked “What do you think is the greatest issue facing the next government?” Miliband once again ‘forgot’ to mention the deficit:

EM: “What I laid out yesterday is a plan to say we’re gonna make this country work once again for working people. Whether on the minimum wage, or the health service, or apprenticeships, or housing.”

JS: “What about the deficit?”

EM: [pause] “The deficit’s an important issue.”

JS: “Well you forgot to mention it. That’s the second time, two days running.”

There is also no mention of the deficit in Labour’s new Party Political Broadcast, released last night. It’s a good thing this interview was carried out in a hospital, Miliband needed to be patched up afterwards…

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Guy News Labour Conference Special: Money, Money, Money

Confused about how Labour are going to fund their latest spending plans? You’re not the only one. In this afternoon’s Guy News Labour conference special, the Shadow Cabinet try to explain where the money will come from. They don’t know either.

“In my dreams, I have a plan… If I had a little money…”

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

WATCH: Ed Miliband Pet Shop Boys Remix

Cameron Caught on Camera
Queen “Purred” at No Vote, “I Want to Sue” Polling Companies

The PM’s unguarded comments to Michael Bloomberg about the Scottish referendum have been caught on tape by Sky News:

“The definition of relief is being Prime Minister of the United Kingdom and calling the Queen and saying ‘It’s alright, it’s okay’. That was something. She purred down the line… But it should never have been that close, it wasn’t in the end. There was a time in the middle of the campaign when it felt… I’ve said I want to find these polling companies and I want to sue them for my stomach ulcers because of what they put me through. It was very nervous moments.”

Yikes!

Monday, September 22, 2014

WATCH: Balls Benefit Backtrack Leaves Reeves Baffled

If you want to see how well-costed and prepared Labour were for Ed Balls’ child benefit announcement earlier, watch Rachel Reeves try to explain the numbers on the Daily Politics. Labour says it will save £400 million, the Treasury say £120 million. Reeves on the other hand reckons it will save ‘several million’. That new found Labour economic competence in full…

 Via @liarpoliticians

Seen Elsewhere

How Avoidable Scandals Destroy Stupid Politicians | Alex Wickham
UKIP Mosque Confusion | The Week
Let’s Ban the Word Internet | Padraig Reidy
Are the Broadcasters Ready For the Election? | Specccie
Moral Bankruptcy of the BBC | David Keighley
UKIP’s ‘Starsky and Hutch’ | Total Politics
Innocent Sun Journo Just Doing Her Job | Sun
Boris Sent Up North | Times
The Only Way to Mend the EU | Leo McKinstry
Northern Labour Tearing Party Apart | David Aaronovitch
Osborne is Son of Brown | Peter Oborne


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Tony Blair threatens Ed:

“If you had a strong political lead that was combining the politics of aspiration with the politics of compassion, I still think that’s where you could get a substantial majority…  If I ever do an interview on [the state of the Labour Party], it will have to be at length…”



Left on Left says:

The lefties are attacking because the panellist is a millionaire and lives in a London home worth upwards of two million. Someone had best tell them he’s called Ed Miliband.


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