Sunday, December 5, 2010

Hancock’s Russian Lolita Faces Deportation for Spying

According to reports “She would walk around in very short skirts and high heels with Hancock and they would be seen having lunch together. Certainly some thought she was charming and intelligent.”

Thursday, December 2, 2010

1% of Tory Election Expenditure Went on Bambi Killing

Going through the £16 million the Tories spent on the election Guido had to laugh when he came across a bill for nearly £30,000 for a dinner at Annabel’s in the Tories’ declared election expenditure, but Return Three is the gift that just keeps giving:

The Carphone Warehouse boss and intriguing donor David Ross donated £40,000 for “shooting” as an auction prize at a fund-raising dinner and billionaire Richard Caring donated another £140,000 worth of shooting. As they were given away as auction prizes the cost had to be factored into notional election spending. Of the total £16,682,874 the Tories spent, some 1% on this:

Brings a tear to your eye…

Guy News: Dave at the Footie

The New Statesman are constantly trying to paint Dave as too posh for football and completely ignorant of the beautiful game. Today they have even gone so far as to claim that this video isn’t of him. Guido calls them on this unfounded smear:

Given that the chap next to Dave in the video bears a remarkable similarity to the former Tory treasurer Jonathan Marland, now a peer, it seems certain to Guido that it really is Dave.  Throw in the emerging bald spot and it would seem the Staggers are yet again making it up for political purposes. Nice try.

Given the extent of the lobbying job Dave is undertaking in Zurich it seems pretty likely that the PM is nowadays a genuine England fan. After his Blairesque speech to FIFA England have gone favourite at the bookies...

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Do They Know They’re Born?

This has to be a pretty compelling argument for students paying their way. Guido presents to you the best and brightest of Northumbria University:

Comparing the privileged life of an undergraduate to kids starving in Africa, who have to worry about their next meal rather than their media studies assignment. Nice.

Monday, November 29, 2010

Tatler’s Intriguing Top Tory Totty

It is seemingly slim pickings for a single girl in Westminster. Tatler’s annual list of London’s most Eligible Bachelors 2010 is out. In the top ten we have one Christopher Myers, presumably going for the lifetime achievement award, and our miniature Member from Penrith, Rory “definitely not a spook” Stewart.

While the the girls might find it tough to win over Mr Myers, Guido is pretty sure both he and Chris are better dancers than Rory:

Form an orderly queue…

(Video courtesy: Sam England, Penrith)

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Guy News: Mock the Liar

Comedian Ed Byrne of Mock the Week fame is one of those of those extremely punchable lefties, he is also a bit of a fibber. Last night he denied ever promoting tuition fees:

They even press released it. You can’t hide those lyin’ eyes…

UPDATE: “Mr” Ed Byrne tweets: “I hold my hands up. Completely forgot about it. Apologies to David Willets”

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Coulson Could Learn a Thing or Two

Some advice from the best…

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Guido v Axe-Killer

After axe-murderer and state-leech John Hirst was destroyed by Andrew Neil on the Daily Politics at lunchtime regarding votes for prisoners, Guido put the boot in on Jeremy Vine Show earlier this afternoon:

It’s not everyday you hear someone call for the return of hanging on the main-stream media, but after John Hirst’s gloating it’s the least he deserves…

Brillo v Axe-Killer

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

“Mer Mer Mer Mister Speaker…”

One time only, for the first time in six months, here’s Gordon:


Seen Elsewhere

Ed’s Constitutional Failure | ConHome
UKIP Poster Girl’s Naked Photos | Sun
Miliband’s Radical Old Labour Agenda | Fraser Nelson
Meet Team Miliband | Dan Hodges
Run Boris Run | Times
Tories Pledge to End Onshore Windfarm Subsidy | Telegraph
Labour’s Plan to Attack Part-Time Boris | Standard
Ex-Sun Hack Cleared After 582 Days on Bail | MediaGuido
11 Times Boris Denied He Would Stand for Parliament | Buzzfeed
Attacking UKIP’s Posters is Counter-Productive | Guardian
Sarkozy Tried it on With Hollande’s Ex | Times


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A confused Nick Griffin says Nigel Farage is a shill for the City, forgetting that City banks want to stay in the EU:

“Farage is a snake oil salesman, but a very good one. His supposed anti-immigration stance is all smoke and mirrors, as is his carefully cultivated image as a ‘man of the people’. The truth is that UKIP is a pro-immigration party that exists to lobby for the interests of the City of London.”



Nick Clegg says:

Do you want lies with that?


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