Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Downing Street Catwalk: Here Come the Boys

The usual suspects are upset at the Mail’s angle on the reshuffle. Gaby Hinsliff mused last night:

And don’t they all look lovely. There is an obvious reason why Gaby’s dream of a male lineup would not have made a very interesting feature:

All the moving men wore the identical outfits…

Monday, July 7, 2014

Curvy Alan Rusbridger Gets the Full Mail Online Treatment

Camped outside celebrity hangout Chiltern Firehouse,  Dave and SamCam’s fav in Marylebone for date night, the snappers spotted Nigella Lawson with an scruffy looking  lunch partner. But who could this “Harry Potter look-a-like” be?

“Alan, her lunchtime companion, wore a crumpled navy suit and a blue shirt which hung to his curves. His hair looked in need of a good brushing and he wore his recognisable round glasses – making him look like the fictional wizard.”

5 points to Slytherin.

Thursday, May 22, 2014

Leaders’ Wives: Polling Day Fashion Edition

All the party leaders have now voted, with Dave and Ed convincing their wives to join them for the usual polling day shot. Nick Clegg appears to have brought a confused looking older friend along with him – believed to be his last remaining local supporter.

On the fashion front Justine played it safe, if a little mumsie, with a simple white tee, a causal navy blazer and some snazzy check print trousers. The epaulettes on the military jacket hardly scream femininity though. Meanwhile, SamCam is bang on trend in cropped navy trousers, complimented with blue court shoes and her favourite metallic dusky-rose silk top. Guessing Mrs Farage has returned to Germany to vote…

Monday, March 3, 2014

Mrs Osborne on George’s Diet

Both Osborne and Balls are on the celebrity 5:2 diet, though Guido hears not everyone was entirely happy with the chunky Chancellor’s austerity effort to cut his waist size. After a female aide changed Osborne’s hair and now his slimming regime, his wife Frances was overheard exclaiming: “If anyone is going to put my husband on a diet, it’s me.”

Friday, February 21, 2014

Cutting Remarks From the Chancellor

Coif connoisseurs rejoice: the Standard has the scoop. Osborne has given them an exclusive interview revealing all about his ‘Footballers that look like lesbians’ haircut:

“The Chancellor comes across as someone who has survived a miserable low (who could forget his dismay at being booed at the 2012 Olympics?) and emerged psychologically stronger or, perhaps, less afraid to fail. Perhaps that explains his Caesar haircut. “There are more important things, dare I say it, for the country to be talking about,” he cried, looking pained.

But whose idea was it and where was it done? Osborne struggles: “It was just a … I means it’s … it’s been made out to be some great big change, a bigger change than it was.” Does his wife Frances like it? “Oh, she likes it,” he said, the shutters slamming down.”

Who doesn’t…

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Beard Watch: Jeremy Browne

Who’d have thought Jezza would become a weirdy beardy…

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Guido’s Fashion Tips: Alec Shelbrooke’s Tiger Onesie

Guido has returned from lunch to the sight of Tory MP Alec Shelbrooke on the Daily Politics, in a tiger onesie:

He pledges to wear it in the Commons if he can raise £5,000 for a hospice charity. A grrrrrreat cause, donate here

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Dave’s Designer Hairdresser Denies Bald Patch

Client confidentiality is assured with Lino Carbosiero MBE, the PM’s designer hairdresser.

Appearing on Sky News to deny his gong was anything to do with the fact he re-branded Dave’s sidey, the smooth talker claimed there was no bald patch.

Which would  the cameras…

And in his never ending quest for impartiality, Guido put it to Labour:

“Ed doesn’t have one person that cuts his hair. He sometimes goes to the local barbers.”

A man of the people. The mystery remains about Osborne’s radical redesign…

Friday, November 8, 2013

Westminster’s Longest Serving Press Officer Departs

He’s had the hardest jobs in politics for a decade but now UKIP head of press Gawain Towler is heading back to Brussels. He will also stand for election in 2014. Putting out fires since most other spinners were still at school, Towler dealt with fruitcakes, loonies and Nigel Farage on a daily basis for years. Westminster will be darker without his signature red trousers, and farewell to the cravat/bowler hat/tweed look. Towler was of course the face of UKIP’s “For Him” clothing range that included the dressing gown above.

Guido hopes internal politics are not at play here.

Farage and co are vulnerable without him.

Friday, October 18, 2013

Great Jumper Wearing Politicians of Our Time

Jumper-gate was the worst knitwear-related blunder since President Carter’s beige address to the nation in 1977. Well we have some renowned jumper wearing politicians of our own. Who can forget Gyles Brandreth and Peter Mandelson camping it up:

Of course Michael Foot was the founding father of jumper-based fashion in the Labour Party:

Taking over the mantle in many ways, Red Ed is himself partial to a socialist chic grey sweater, perfect for those windy days standing on soapboxes:

Social and Liberal Democratic grandees Lords Owen and Steel were trendsetters for future generations back in the day:

Nowadays the yellows have Mike Hancock, while Chris Huhne brought a new meaning to the phrase pullover, sir:

Anthony Eden had the blue corner covered. Also a fan of a woolly dog:

You get the impression the yanks have always been way ahead of us though. Michael Dukakis is in a league of his own, while Chris Christie goes as far as having his own branding:

The class of 2013 is well-represented by the likes of Caroline Dinenage, Ken Clarke and Craig Whittaker:

And Matt Hancock. Obviously.

Of course the PM is fully behind them:

We’re all in knit together…


Seen Elsewhere

Why We Need Change | Douglas Carswell
The Howard Roark of Westminster | Guardian
Carswell, the Clacton Cassandra | James Ford
Love Bomb Carswell | ConservativeHome
Denis MacShane’s Ex is Now Hacked Off Spokesman | Speccie
How the Carswell Story Unfolded | Sky News
How to Defect | Telegraph
Carswell Defection Will Dismay Thoughtful Tories | ConservativeHome
Carswell: Darling of the Tories, Labour and Now UKIP | Speccie
Where is the Love? | Tom Watson
Tory Eurosceptics Weakened | Speccie


VOTER-RECALL
Get the book Find out more about PLMR


Douglas Carswell’s side-kick Dan Hannan MEP pours water on the obvious question:

“I won’t be joining UKIP, though I wish Douglas Carswell all the best. He has been a superb MP, and it’s honourable to stand for re-election.”



Owen Jones says:

We also need Zil lanes.


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