Curvy Alan Rusbridger Gets the Full Mail Online Treatment

Camped outside celebrity hangout Chiltern Firehouse,  Dave and SamCam’s fav in Marylebone for date night, the snappers spotted Nigella Lawson with an scruffy looking  lunch partner. But who could this “Harry Potter look-a-like” be?

“Alan, her lunchtime companion, wore a crumpled navy suit and a blue shirt which hung to his curves. His hair looked in need of a good brushing and he wore his recognisable round glasses – making him look like the fictional wizard.”

5 points to Slytherin.

Lobby Snorts at Labour Lawbreaker Line

One question has been buzzing around today:

One for Ed’s team to sniff out.

Liberty Online: Live Stream of Guido at #Liberty2014

A post-three bottle lunch Guido has strolled down to the CPS conference. Tune in at 18:30:

Maggie, Maggie, Maggie! Hic, hic, hic!

Dame! William Hague, Foreign Sec Honours Actress

Willy kneel?

Aussie Plain Packs Experiment Fails “Evidence World’s Toughest Anti-Smoking Laws Not Working”

Not a day goes by without some left-wing health zealot calling on the UK to follow Australia’s lead and introduce plain packs. But it has not escaped Guido’s notice that they are strangely silent on whether it works.

Perhaps this is why…
aussie-plain-packs-frontpage

MPs are increasingly aware of the growing consensus down under that Labor’s nanny state has spectacularly backfired – with more fags sold now than before. Health experts, academics and commentators are mocking the policy and parliament is debating its repeal. No wonder Tory backbenchers think it a “shame” to follow suit…

Farage Drowns His Sorrows at the Newark Count

Despite his Maltese hangover, Nigel Farage was back on the Malbec at the Newark count:

Taking it down a notch or two from his jet-set partying earlier in the week.

Crystal Methodist Pleads Guilty

Rev Flowers has pleaded guilty to possession of cocaine, methyl amphetamine and ketamine at Leeds Magistrates Court. He has been fined £525. Or 6 Gs as he would call it.

Crystal Methodist Thanks BBC for Newsnight Fawning

Having been charged with drug offences this morning, the renowned gak-fiend Reverend Flowers lavished praise on the BBC for giving him such an easy ride when he appeared on Newsnight:

“There is a phrase for some people, they call them vultures, and I really do hope that somebody quotes me on that, especially the BBC. The BBC have been really nice to me but the rest of you are vultures.”

He must be very grateful that Newsnight failed to ask him about his use of drugs and rent-boys since he declared himself a changed man…

Nigel Evans Cleared of Rape and Sexual Assault No Immediate Restoration of Tory Whip

Evans was led from the dock in tears as local supporters and friends in the gallery erupted into cheers.

Not guilty on eight counts. 

UPDATE: The Guardian are withering in their destruction of the CPS case against Evans:

“The prosecution case against Nigel Evans, the former Commons deputy speaker, began to fall apart as soon as his accusers entered the witness box.

[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +

Hacks Dry, While Bullingdon Boy Dimbers is on the Bolly

Bullingdon Boy David Dimbleby is already on the Bollinger, while the mere plebs in the Spin Room will apparently be left dry for tonight’s BBC Europe debate. Beeb cuts are biting deep for all but a few privileged old timers.

In light of this tragic news, Guido is planning on pre-gaming in the bar of the Langham Hotel opposite Broadcasting House from about 5.30:

It’s a convenient location, if a little pricey.[…] Read the rest

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Chuka Ne Remember Rien

The socialist French government have been showing Chuka Umunna some love, whisking the our two-faced chum across the channel for an all-expenses paid three day visit.

The £4,348 cost of the trip included the services of a translator, which is odd given Chuka boasts on his CV about his degree in English and French Law.[…] Read the rest

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Celebrate this Special Day

Image

Today has been a long time coming for many co-conspirators, a day we feared we would never see. Fortunately Norman Tebbit’s serious poor health this year has not stopped him becoming 83 years young today. Happy Birthday Norman![…] Read the rest

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The Honourable Member for Tinder

These screenshots from hook up app Tinder are doing rounds, purporting to be LibDem MP Stephen Gilbert. At least he seems to have kept his clothes on, unlike the last MP to get caught up in online dating. Left swipe.[…] Read the rest

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MPs Laughing at Cancer

Over £100, 000 was raised last night at the Sixteenth Annual Macmillan Cancer Support’s Parliamentary Palace of Varieties. The Daily Politics were there, though they missed Guido losing a bet to LibDem MP John Hemming that Fabricant, Gillan and Binley would slag off the PM in their turn.[…] Read the rest

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@MsSallyBercow Tweets Sally in Rehab

Sally-Berow-2461841

Late last night an account purporting to be that of Sally Bercow tweeted:

“SB friend for 20 yrs & she asked i tweet 4 her- she in spa/rehab”.

The Speaker’s Office declined the opportunity to comment. Sally was not immediately available at the time of going to pixel…

UPDATE: Sally claims she was hacked.[…] Read the rest

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Farage Does Drugs

faragedugs

“Last week, Nick Clegg returned from a trip to South America. Goodness knows what he smoked out there, because he actually made a couple of smart points. First, the so-called War on Drugs isn’t working. Second, we should appoint a royal commission to look into the alternatives.

[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +



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