Monday, March 11, 2013

Clegg-nam Style: Deputy PM Mimics Korean Pop Star’s Moves

During his keynote speech at Lib Dem conference this weekend Clegg seemed to do some K-pop moves:

clegg-nam

This genius observation was made by the Daily Mail’s Francesca Infante.

The Guy Newsroom salutes you Francesca…

UPDATE:

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Join Guido at the YBF Rally, Then Fatboy Slim

Guido is off to parliament to speak at the ultrasound Young Britons’ Foundation rally this evening. Afterwards he is hoping to gatecrash Fatboy Slim’s charity DJ set at the Terrace bar.

Right here, right now – could hardly be more appropriate for YBF…

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Poll: Majority Want Cannabis Decriminalised

Before Christmas the PM rejected calls for a royal commission on drugs, arguing somewhat unfeasibly that the current policy was “working”. Despite that Clegg has moved in the right direction coming out as pro-liberalisation, packing off Jeremy Browne “Sugar” to Amsterdam on an, ahem, “fact-finding mission”. Tonight a new Ipsos Mori poll shows that 53% support either the legalisation or decriminalisation of cannabis.

Two thirds want a review of all policy options, rather encouragingly that figure increases to 70% among Conservative supporters. A Portuguese-style decriminalisation of drugs is also backed by just under half of the population. Dave is resisting the British public’s freedom to party…

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Right Here, Right Now, In Parliament
Fat Boy Slim to DJ Westminster

Guido is preparing to relive his more youthful days as Fat Boy Slim is playing in Parliament on 6 March, thanks to the Last Night A DJ Saved My Life Foundation. Norman Cook is excited too: “I’ve played some exciting and unique places around the world from Bondi Beach to The Great Wall of China to an Igloo but playing in the House of Commons might be the most unique to date.” See you at the “House The House” event. Sorted.

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Two Faced Chuka’s Christmas Message

If you take a stroll  past Chuka Umunna’s constituency office in Streatham today, you are greeted by this message:

And where is their saviour when you need him?

His villa in Ibiza perhaps? 

No, in fact he’s hosting another one of his parties tonight for media types instead of being there for his constituents. The only problem is that it seems not many of them want to go and the city agency that Umunna has outsourced running his party to are starting to flap:

That’s what happens when you try to be all things to all people…

Friday, December 14, 2012

Browne Sugar
LibDem’s ‘Fact-Finding Mission’ to Amsterdam

BROWNE

Coming out as pro-liberalisation if not pro-drugs legalisation, at least Nick Clegg is moving in the right direction this morning. There is much talk in Westminster, surely not rooted in jealously, of his announcement that Jeremy Browne will be sent on an all-expenses paid “fact-finding mission” to Amsterdam, Portugal and Latin America. The Home Office minister will be, ahem, researching the effects of liberal drugs policies in these countries. At least that’s what he is telling his boss…

Monday, November 19, 2012

Gaza’s Aqua Park has Been Destroyed

The Crazy Water Park, which was at the heart of Gaza’s vibrant tourist scene, has been destroyed by fire. Gazans used to be able to swim and relax by the pools and there were water slides for the young children. It was a happy place once but the Middle East News Watch reports:

“40 gunmen tied up and blindfolded a nightwatchman before setting fire to an administrative building and restaurant. The fire engulfed different parts of the club, including an administrative building, and then spread to the main restaurant and cafeteria, which is three storeys high.”

No, this was not the repressive IDF attacking the strip, it was Hamas terrorists who were outraged that the park had “hosted parties in which men and women mingled.” Nice bunch.

Friday, October 12, 2012

Rest in Peace – Prince Roy of Sealand
“I might die young or old, but I will never die of boredom”

Farewell then Prince Roy of Sealand, leader of the free micro-state based seven miles off of Suffolk coast. The pirate radio guru,  former British Army Major and libertarian poster-boy Paddy Roy Bates has died aged 91. Prince Roy seized Sealand in 1967, and declared it an independent nation in 1975. After various coups and run-ins with the British Navy, Sealand was finally recognised as a nation after the Germans sent a hostage negotiator to the 5,920sq ft former civil war fort after an attempted coup in 1978.

After broadcasting pirate radio across the south-east of England, the principality has latterly made its money out of hosting servers and selling titles to the likes of Neo-Guido, a Baron of the free-land. Prince Roy is succeeded, after a minor power struggle with Princess Joan, by Michael, the new regent and head of state. There could be a challenge though by one Johannes Seiger who is head of the shadow Sealandic Rebel Government, based in Germany, since his father was forced out after the failed coup of ’78.

A major film is in production about the nation’s history, until then Guido will leave you with the motto of this concrete paradise: “E Mare Libertas”

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Evan Harris Actually on Drugs

If you missed the much-maligned Professor David Nutt on Radio 4 this morning, then Guido would highly recommend catching up on the interview here. His research into using drugs like ecstasy and magic mushrooms to treat depression or to allow victims of trauma to open up about their experiences was fascinating. It’s now emerged that former LibDem MP Evan Harris will be taking party in Nutt’s Channel Four show which will look at the effects of MDMA. The usual crowd are shocked and appalled that a former MP will be dropping a bean live on TV. Guido had always presumed Evan Harris was on drugs anyway…

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Lobbyists, Wonks and Tories Mingling at the Russian Embassy
Conservative Friends of Russia Launch Party

Last night Guido infiltrated the Russian Embassy for the Conservative Friends of Russia launch party. The vodka was flowing as lobbyists, businessmen, wonks and Conservative MPs mingled with Russian diplomats and pals of Putin. Guido gathers that the decision to set up Conservative Friends of Russia was not taken lightly, with the Tory hierarchy expressing concerns that the group was being established the week after the Pussy Riot girls were imprisoned. Perhaps that was why the advertised keynote speaker Malcolm Rifkind didn’t show…

Replacing Rifkind was John Whittingdale, who awkwardly noted that “sometimes our country will not agree with your country, and sometimes your country will not agree with ours“. With the pleasantries dealt with the Russian Standard booze was wheeled out and tongues were loosened. One champagne-swilling Russian reader told Guido that he would be locked up if he ever decided to relocate the blog to the motherland…

UPDATE: CFoR have got in touch claiming that Rifkind is in Scotland and was never due to speak at the event. Despite being their Honorary President

UPDATE II:  Guido has independently confirmed that Rifkind was in Edinburgh yesterday and was never intended to be there.


Seen Elsewhere

Jason Groves New Mail Deputy Pol Ed | MediaGuido
Cocaine Conservatives | Standard
Jezza Browne Responds to LibDem Haters | LibDem Voice
Why Britain Needs to Leave the EU | Douglas Carswell
Who Tells Ed When He’s Wrong? | Speccie
Hands Off Our Cojones, Mr Clegg | Laura Perrins
London Live Averaging Just 2,400 Viewers | Forbes
Ed’s Constitutional Failure | ConHome
UKIP Poster Girl’s Naked Photos | Sun
Miliband’s Radical Old Labour Agenda | Fraser Nelson
Meet Team Miliband | Dan Hodges


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Dan Hodges on Team Miliband:

“‘Poisonous’, was the picture painted by one former senior advisor. ‘Dysfunctional,’ said one shadow cabinet member. ‘A bunch of medieval courtiers, not an office,’ said another. The most positive description I could get was ‘It’s a work in progress. They’re learning. Slowly. But they are learning.’”



Nick Clegg says:

Do you want lies with that?


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