They say life begins at forty, but Guido reckons George Osborne’s birthday today won’t be as much fun as when he was twenty. He still has one vice these days – orange jelly…
It seems appropriate that Kirkcaldy, Jonah Brown’s home town, provided the SNP with their majority. Saorsa!
Cue a thousand conspiracy theories about his quick burial at sea. One thing is for sure: Hell is going to be a bit of a surprise for Osama…
Overblown comparisons to the suffragette movement seem to be all the rage this weekend. After Miliband’s “I have a dream speech” one parliamentary bag-carrier took things a step further. Emily Davidson slept in parliament on the night of 1911 census to highlight the issue of votes for women, and a number of Tory researchers did the same last night to apparently highlight the that “overbearing government is the big issue of the day.” One emailed Guido early this morning to tell him:
“Ordinary people are being increasingly spied on by government snoopers. I wanted to take a stand and highlight the need for parliament to defend our civil liberties. Obviously it’s illegal to refuse to do the census or to lie, so my protest enables me to be honest with the Office of National Statistics without telling them anything about where I live.”
Guido is always bemused that the ritual destruction of private property on left-wing demonstrations is attributed to “anarchists”. It seems very unlikely that they are anarchists, far more likely Socialist Worker Party toytown trots and knuckle-dragging leftie trouble makers. Anarchists want to smash the state not increase the size and scope of it…
Because it is a sunny Sunday here is Guido’s favourite funky anarchist anthem, “No Government” by Nicolette:
Remember kids, real anarchists don’t pay taxes…
The budget debate has been rather tetchy and laden with low blows and bitchiness. Excellent.
After Jess Norman had to withdraw the suggestion that the Shadow Chancellor must have been hallucinogenic drugs when he wrecked the economy, Ed Balls, (or Edgar according to Ben Brogan) saw an open goal. “I have never been on hallucinogenic drugs, would any of the front bench like to intervene…” Osborne giggled.
Is Balls really to lecture one other people’s university days activities though?
Former smoker David Cameron and current smokers Nick Clegg, Simon Burns, Steve Hilton etc are outlawing tobacco advertising. Do as they say, not as they do. Leaving aside the obvious risk that cutting off thousands of small shops at the knees poses, just as with prohibition and drugs, the evidence suggests that forcing vices underground increases the attraction. An “enemy of enterprise” and a purveyor of forbidden fruits in one easy piece of legislation.
Founder of the right-wing Cornerstone group John Hayes, 52, is certainly a lively addition to the green benches, but it seems his agent is even more of a party animal. Craig Jackson was denied bail this morning and held on […]
Ed Miliband told Piers Morgan that he was a bit of “a square” at university, hence why he never took drugs or slept with as many girls as Nick Clegg. While Guido didn’t have much trouble believing this, with a […]
This is Courtney Love, newly elected as Oxford University Conservative Association’s ‘Non-Executive Officer for Rock and Roll’. She was elected to her position tonight after an evening of drinking, in this instance the teen spirit was port. Courtney contributed to […]
Guido didn’t weigh in on the minimum pricing story yesterday because if he jumped on every broken promise from Dave he would be typing till the cows came home. Instead of living up to his promise of being on the […]