Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Stranger Things Have Happened…

… Though not many. The baronetcy heir apparent tests the effects on the working man of his 1p cut to the price of beer, pulling a pint for Tom Watson in parliament’s Strangers bar last night. Sampling the latest from his local brewery, called Pennies from Eleven apparently. Must not make eye contact…

Via @michaeldughermp

Friday, May 24, 2013

Farage Cautioned For Being Drunk and Disorderly

Nigel Farage’s city trader son will receive the caution after being found a bit worse for wear by cops in central London. A rite of passage for the offspring of any great leader.

It happens to the best of us…

Via CourtNews.

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

This UKIP Candidate Definitely Not Racist or Homophobic

18-y-o-ukipper

Our colleagues over at The Sun put 18-year-old politics student Bradley Monk, standing for UKIP to get on the Hampshire County Council seat Winchester Eastgate tomorrow, on page 2 after he put pictures of himself wearing a creepy Jimmy Savile mask on his Facebook page. Further examination of his Facebook reveals him dressed in a bikini having a drunken snog with Eric Cunha, another UKIP activist. Guido thinks we can safely say this is one UKIP candidate who is neither racist or homophobic…

Monday, April 29, 2013

Lobsterity Lunch

lobsterity

Neo-Guido is 27 years old, never been kissed…

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Majestic Wines offer an Argentinian Toast Today

argie-wine-day

Of course today would be Majestic’s World Malbec Day, brought to you by “Wines of Argentina”. Not quite in the Oddbins league perhaps, though this must be the second most unfortunate booze promotion of the week. Guido will be heading down to Maggie’s nightclub later this evening, where the drinks will be rather more suited to today’s other occasion of note…

Monday, April 15, 2013

McBride and Shapps Bond Over Beers

As Guido revealed in his Sun on Sunday column, an unlikely alliance has been forged over beers. The gruesome twosome of Damian McBride and Grant Shapps teamed up for a Macmillian charity pub quiz night last week. McBride tells Guido how Grant “demolished a round of cryptic clues to underground stations”, with the pair finishing second overall. Shapps was rather more coy about his new friend…

Ten Visitors a Day Caught With Knives in Parliament

In yesterday’s Sun column Guido revealed that police guarding the checkpoints at entrances to Parliament have confiscated 641 knives from visitors in the first two months of this year, an average of more than ten a day. Lock knives, flick knives and Swiss army knives were among those found, so much for Dave’s promise to lock up anyone carrying a blade. Some of the more crazy and kinky items confiscated include bungee jumping equipment, stilts, footballs, a hockey stick, and fluffy handcuffs. The 43 people who tried to take whisky, vodka and wine in should have saved their money and taken advantage of Parliament’s subsidised booze instead…

Thursday, March 28, 2013

Boozed Up BBC Partygoers Go Out With a Bang

20130328-085132.jpg Copious booze, staff nicking mementos and partygoers scoring in the studios; the Beeb’s Television Centre goodbye party sounds like a night to remember. Or, more likely, forget:

Meanwhile today half the hacks in the BBC’s swanky new studio are on strike over job cuts. Happy Easter weekend…

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Double Standards in Labour Education

Backbench dunce Ian Mearns wasted no time in sticking his oar in to the bitch fight between Tim Loughton and the anonymous @ToryEducation yesterday. The Member of the Education Select Committee must have thought he was onto a right wheeze up there on his high horse:

“This extraordinary attack is another example of derogatory language…. There is no place for these kind of personal attacks in public life. The Education Secretary needs to take action.”

Guido is looking forward to the poor delicate flower press releasing his concern about another Honourable Member’s sharp words last night. Brownite boot-boy Ian Austin went off on one at Greg Hands, amusingly about the very same Ian Mearns:

Guido has asked Mearns whether he is standing by his line that “there is no place for these kind of personal attacks in public life”. For some reason he has yet to reply…

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Shepherd’s Bye

Lamentations across Westminster village as word spreads that upmarket lunch spot Shepherd’s has shut down. What was rumoured to be a gas leak has now been confirmed as a full closure. Guido is shocked and saddened. There are too many poncy restaurants in Westminster and for some reason Shepherd’s  had been recently remodelled and menu changed for worse.

He did enjoy end of meal looks of horror when a politico leaving would realise he had been braying loudly at the next table.

And they made a good Bloody Mary…


Seen Elsewhere

UKIP Fundraiser Was Jailed for Running Brothels | Times
Bercow Faces Probe Over Pass Mystery | Mirror
Harman Breaks Rules on Paying Staff | Express
Labour Whinge About Sandi Toksvig Joke | Mail
BBC Boss Search in Disarray | Times
Tory Membership Set to Outstrip Labour | Staggers
Three Cheers for the David Brents | Ed Conway
Small State Keynesians, Anti-Corporate Hayekians? | Chris Dillow
Ruffley Shows Why We Need a Proper Recall Bill Now | Alex Wickham
How is Miliband’s ‘New Politics’ Working Out? | Speccie
State Should Send More Poor Children Private | Sam Bowman


new-advert
Westbourne-Change-Opinion Guido-hot-button (1)


Damian McBride writes in the epilogue to his memoir…

“At the time of writing, nine months from the election, I’ve concluded that Labour currently has no positive messages to communicate to anyone about why they should vote for the party, no policies which will persuade them, and is being run in a totally dysfunctional way.”



Rob Wilson says:

Without Predujice

Darling

What time will dinner be ready this evening?

Yours

Rob Wilson MP

In the interests of me I am placing a copy of this email in the public domain.


Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:






RSS


AddThis Feed Button
Archive


Labels
Guido Reads