Another U-Turn: Poppers Unbanned

Victory for Crispin Blunt as Home Office minister Karen Bradley confirms that the government no longer considers poppers a psychoactive drug:

“I understand that the Council has now advanced its understanding of the psychoactivity of the alkyl nitrites group under the Act and concluded that only substances that directly stimulate or depress the central nervous system are psychoactive under the Act. Having given due consideration, the Government agrees with your advice and interpretation of the definition. We do so in the understanding that “poppers” have these unique indirect effects. Our understanding is that this approach does not have any further implications for the operation of the Act and that other substances that the Act intends to cover are not affected.”

That sound you can hear coming from the parliamentary estate: “Wooooooooooooooo!”

Bryant’s Osborne Coke Joke

Chris Bryant has a good line. “I’m delighted that finally the Chancellor has realised the dangers of Coke…”

Crispin Pleads for Poppers

blunt-poppersThis afternoon could see the the banning of amyl nitrate “poppers” – a psychoactive substance popular in the gay community and with clubbers. Crispin Blunt is worried about the government banning poppers and has emailed fellow MPs:

From: BLUNT, Crispin
Sent: 20 January 2016 13:06
Subject: Psychoactive Substances Bill
Importance: High

Dear all,

This afternoon there may be an amendment moved to support the Home Affairs Select Committee’s recommendation to exempt alkyl nitrates, also known as “poppers” from the Psychoactive Substances Bill. The relative paragraph is 45 of their first report:

“We accept the evidence given by Professor Iversen, the National Aids Trust, and the Gay Men’s Health Collective on alkyl nitrites, also known as ‘poppers’. Professor Iversen said ‘poppers’ were “not seen to be capable of having harmful effects sufficient to constitute a societal problem” and therefore we recommend they should not be banned. If in the future there is any evidence produced to the contrary, then ‘poppers’ should be removed from the exempted list or controlled under the Misuse of Drugs Act”.

I am very concerned about this measure which would have the consequences outlined in paragraph 43 of the Home Affairs Select Committee report.

If amendment 5 is put, I will be voting for it, and I hope Colleagues will join me so that they might at least not be party to a grave error of judgement by the Government.

Yours ever,

Crispin

Guido understands that inhalation of poppers at the point of orgasm results in an extended woooooohhhh!

UPDATE: “I use poppers, I out myself as a popper user, and would be directly affected by this legislation.”

Ireland To Decriminalise Drugs

ireland

Guid O’Fawkes is pleased to report that the Ireland is to decriminalise drugs for personal use. From 2016 the possession of small quantities of drugs, including heroin, cocaine, and cannabis, will no longer be a criminal offence. Aodhán Ó Ríordáin, the chief of Ireland’s National Drugs Strategy, has spoken of the need for a ‘radical cultural shift’ in how drug use is viewed. Ahh, the green, green grass of home…

Delingpole on Druggy Dave

James Delingpole recalls “a beautiful sunny afternoon in the summer of 1985”, where he, a young David Cameron and another James “are sitting cross-legged in an oak-panelled room high above one of Oxford’s grandest college quads stoned out of their brains on marijuana”.

“Check that out!” says Dave. His father’s a wealthy stockbroker; like the other James, he went to Eton; he’s very good at tennis, he’s got a gorgeous girlfriend called Fran and he speaks in the richy, fruity voice of one who knows he is born to rule.

“Check what out?” I say. Of the three, I’m the least posh. I only went to a ‘minor public school’ and I speak with a slight Birmingham accent.

“That amazing drum sound,” says Dave. “Where the beats all go close together and kind of merge into one.”

“Oh yeah. The flam” says James, who knows his music.

“Yeah the flam,” agrees Dave. “Maybe that’s what we should call ourselves: The Flam Club.”

“And what exactly is the purpose of the Flam Club, exactly?” I ask.

“We sit around getting stoned and listening out for the flams on Supertramp albums,” explains Dave.

Read the full account over on Breitbart here

Lord Coke Won’t Face Charges

lord sewel

Developing…

Who Squealed?

The hunt is on to find out which current Tory MP and contemporary of Dave at Oxford squealed. Guido makes no allegations about any of those listed below for information purposes only…

  • Michael Gove: He was a gossipy young wannabe journalist at the time and enjoyed a wild university experience himself. Most famously Gove was accused in the Cherwell student newspaper of participating in a “five-in-a-bed romp” while president of the Oxford Union debating society.
  • Rory Stewart: According to lifelong friend Felix Martin, Rory was a leading member of the Piers Gaveston Society”, the debauched Oxford club at which Dave allegedly did the deed. A few years younger than the future PM, though…
  • Boris Johnson: A former Buller man and also reportedly an alumnus of Piers Gaveston, Boris was famously snapped with Dave in the picture they tried to ban. Is there another more revealing photo in existence?
  • Ed Vaizey: Was at Oxford at the same time as Dave, where he was known as “Tubby Teddy” or “Fat Eddie“. Like Dave, also one of the Notting Hill set.
  • Mark Field: Two years above Cameron, the Tory backbencher was news editor of Cherwell and renowned for his own youthful exuberance. When he ended his term as Junior Common Room president, Field apparentlyran round the college quad between the strokes of midnight singing the Red Flag, naked except for a pair of boxer shorts, his bare skin coated in baby oil“.
  • Mark Harper: A couple of years below Dave, Harper is a fellow Brasenose College alumnus, and was another PPEist. Now Cameron’s chief whip…
  • Nick Boles: A year older than Cameron at Oxford, where he was a young Tory activist and another Notting Hill setter.

So, whodunnit?

Pic via @GeneralBoles

#PigGate #SnoutRage: Internet Reacts

According to Lord Ashcroft and a single-source unnamed Tory MP, David Cameron placed “a private part of his anatomy” into a dead pig’s mouth during an initiation at Oxford. This is how the internet responded to the news:

The packed out Lobby briefing this morning is going to be about hamage control…

Corbynistas Already Planning Victory Rally

There might be a month until the ballot closes, but that hasn’t stopped some excitable Corbyn supporters from organising a mass “victory party” for their man on September 12:

Nearly 1,000 people have already signed up to attend the event, which sounds just great:

Will they be flying the red flag through the streets of London, or are they a tad premature?[…]

+ READ MORE +

Burnham’s Big Pharma Fudge

You might have thought the Shadow Health Secretary would want to have his say on the brewing Pfizer scandal, which has seen the drugs giant accused of overcharging the NHS for epilepsy treatments. Surely this is an opportunity for the Labour leadership candidate holding the health brief to stand up to those big nasty drugs corporations?[…]

+ READ MORE +

Lord Sewel Full Statement Text

LORD-COKE

Lord Sewel has this morning contacted the Clerk of the Parliaments indicating his intention to terminate his Membership of the House of Lords with immediate effect. In his correspondence to the Clerk Lord Sewel issued the following statement:

“I have today written to the Clerk of the Parliaments terminating my membership of the House of Lords.

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Met Police Raid Lord Coke’s Dolphin Square Flat

Well that escalated quickly…[…]

+ READ MORE +

Harman Horror at Penile Drugs Injection

Guido was having a Friday afternoon peruse of the Southwark News when he suddenly crossed his legs and winced:

Southwark council leader Peter John recalls the time Harriet Harman visited the Ayelsbury council estate with a local councillor:

“They were in a lift and a man was injecting drugs into his penis.

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Green Party Press Office Glasto Come Down

lucas bennett

The Green Party press office has had a ‘mare this morning, sending out a series of competing emails as both Caroline Lucas and Natalie Bennett vied for attention. It seems no one is quite sure who the real leader of their party is…

09:43:

“Lancashire councillors have chance to “draw a line under the government’s fracking fantasy”, says Natalie Bennett”

11:37:

Lucas, the Green Party MP for Brighton Pavilion, labelled the decision a ‘fantsastic victory’ in spite of Government efforts to ‘force through fracking’.”

‘Fantsastic’

12:20:

“Green Party leader Natalie Bennett has welcomed Lancashire County Council’s decision to refuse a planning application for fracking”

12:35:

“CORRECTION: The below quote was just sent out in Green Party leader Natalie Bennett‘s name, but it should have been attributed to Green MP for Brighton Pavilion Caroline Lucas.

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Green Party Youth’s Glastonbury Mash Up

festival-crowd-girls

The bright eyed youth wing of the Green Party are sending 100 of their members to Glastonbury Festival as part of a “sustainability project”. They will aim to establish “sustainable ‘villages’ which minimise everyone’s impact on the farm“.[…]

+ READ MORE +

Cannabis Campaigners For Corbyn

Coach loads of trots are being bussed into London on Saturday for a union-funded End Austerity Now march on parliament. Jeremy Corbyn will be there, hoping to convince as many as he can to pay their £3 and sign up to vote.[…]

+ READ MORE +



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