Yesterday Labour published their policy review report making the case for a British Investment Bank. Ed told an audience at the Co-op bank that the UK’s financial services sector was “socially destructive“, throwing his weight behind Nicholas Tott’s suggestion of a state-run investment bank to help small businesses. That’s the same Nicholas Tott whose credentials include Bromley NHS’ Private Finance Initiative, a scheme with such astounding success that the trust has now effectively gone into administration. Good to know that Ed is listening to the right people on finance…
Ed tried the old Cameron trick of no notes and no podium for his manufacturing speech today. Opening with some cracks about where he came in the Sky News totty trumps rankings, he tried to pretend he didn’t mind jibes about his looks. It would have worked better if he hadn’t been sporting yet another variation on his seemingly un-controllable pillow-hair. Geeky Ed is dressing a lot better these days. He has a range of TM Lewin suits for ordinary days and an Ozwald Boateng whistle for high days and holidays. However there is one recurring problem…
It’s not just the usual car-crash radio call-in today that is worries Labour insiders, Guido hears that Tom Baldwin is worried about two things; being marginalised by the new Chief-of-Staff Tim Livesey and secondly, Ed’s nose. He’s said to have raised the fact that things have got worse since his operation last summer, both in look and nasal twang. Baldwin even went as far as to suggest cosmetic surgery, something Ed rejected indignantly. The recent Party Political Broadcast voiced-over by Ed sounded like he was speaking underwater…
We hope to persuade Peter Hain to join us as a patron and ensure that Ed Miliband leads the Labour Party into the general election. For that is what we all want…
The evil Murdoch mouthpiece Adam Boulton was left speechless and humiliated by a confident Ed, who quelled all speculation about his leadership in an interview with Sky. Ed was particularly stwong and definitely did not wince when faced with the fact that only 6% of people believe that he has a credible economic plan. He also nailed that shocking question about whether he should stand down for the good of the party. The crisis is over…
UPDATE: Ed falsely claimed to Jon Snow that only 50% of Labour Party funds come from the unions, according to the official filings it is 86%.
Jon Snow should know better…
Video via LiarPoliticians
Guido is happy to welcome Jacking Ashley into the Don’t Unseat Ed Miliband Association, but he’s not sure she’s doing the cause any favours with this morning’s hysterical hyperbole. While discussing Ed’s critics she compares their behaviour to US Marines urinating on dead Afghans:
“It’s a game that the Westminster village has always enjoyed. Nick Clegg was last year’s victim, now it’s Ed’s turn. If enough pundits treat him as the US marines treated the Afghan dead, and if the public notices and reflects this contempt back through opinion polls, then somehow or other he might collapse.”
They even link back to the Guardian’s own coverage of the incident, just in case you missed this gloriously unsubtle point. Guido is still trying to work out whether the comparison with holding the Leader of the Opposition to account was done with a straight face. He has a feeling it was…
While Guido and other scribes have had their work cut out with the Don’t Unseat Ed Miliband Association, the bagcarrier based Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Ed Miliband have moved up from postering the walls of parliament to a whole video campaign:
[vodpod id=Video.15951559&w=425&h=350&fv=] Excellent commitment to the cause.
Watch how Ed effortlessly strikes down his critics and dismisses any speculation that he is losing control of his party as “Kremlinology”. Murdoch’s agitators fail again.
Last week it was Glasman, Byrne and Murphy having their say about Labour’s direction under Ed, today it’s his own brother. David Miliband has called for Labour to apologise for more of the things that they got wrong in government. Ed Balls attempted a “sorry we didn’t regulate enough”, but the big brother clearly thinks Ed should go further:
“There’s a debate in the Labour Party about how we should understand our record in government, what we should be proud of and what we should apologise for.
The Don’t Unseat Ed Miliband Association had a shaky baptism of fire last week. Both big mouths and events caused no end of trouble. So good news then that Labour are looking to hire a spinner solely for rapid rebuttal:
Job title: Executive Director, Rebuttal and Policy
Location: Based at Head Office London
Key Purpose: Provide strategic leadership responsible for designing the Party’s policy programme and managing the research and rebuttal functions necessary to carry out this role
Working with the leadership, shadow cabinet and all parts of the Party, to co-ordinate and implement a winning policy agenda to lead into the next general election
Establish a rapid rebuttal function to allow the Party to respond quickly and effectively to claims made about the Party’s policy positions
Guido is looking forward to sparring…[…]
Guido hears that Miliband is preparing a Brown-style relaunch next week. He’s booked into Tuesday morning’s Today programme and will then head to the Oxo Tower, not for a stock speech, but to have another crack at the much derided Predators v Producers idea.[…]
Ed Miliband seems to have missed out on those popular few months that even Gordon managed to achieve in the summer of 2007 and has gone straight to the continual leadership crisis stage. Just when Guido thought the Don’t Unseat Ed Miliband Association had got through a successful day of defeating the traitors, Ed’s own guru Maurice Glasman pops up with his Staggers column.[…]
This is clearly the work of Dan Hodges taking the survey multiple times. Shame on LabourList for not weighting the poll accordingly and then trying to craft an “average at best” narrative around it.[…]