Today was the first day back at school for the boys of Finchley Catholic High School.  Guido popped along early this morning to see one old boy and hardly recognised the middle-aged man strolling slowly across the school playground, stooping occasionally to pick up litter from the ground.  As Guido strode purposefully towards him he turned away entering a building where the staff were assembled for a first day briefing from the headmaster.  For a moment Guido thought the baseball cap disguise had been seen through.

“Damian!” Guido shouted at him, he turned in the doorway startled, “Greetings from Nadine Dorries”.  With a bemused look on his face he accepted the official Court papers, served by yours truly, on behalf of Nadine Dorries> Dorries, you will recall, is the MP he falsely accused of sleeping with another Tory MP in emails to Derek Draper, Kevin Maguire and Charlie Whelan.   Realising suddenly what had just happened he disappeared into the building as teachers and other bemused staff glimpsed across.  Damian never should have spilt that Guinness…

UPDATE : Mrs Draper took the papers on behalf of Dolly from Tory Bear.

When Guido was on his summer holidays in France, Damian McBride gave an interview to the BBC’s Radio 5 Live and  to the Guardian to try and draw a line under his Smeargate demise.

If you listen to the first minute and a half of that BBC interview he says at one point:

“… When I read back the emails I had errr written and I did that when Derek ahhh Draper called me and said that he thought his emails had been hacked into and errr we had a discussion about this, I thought and and he thought that the main issue was some emails that I had sent, err, about racism in the comments in the Guido Fawkes website.”

Now you may recall that Iain Dale and Guido both sent in Freedom of Information requests about the smear campaign directed at us from within Downing Street. Obviously Guido was aware of the existence of the emails (having said as much on Andrew Neil’s Daily Politics).  The emails basically instructed Draper on how to frame and phrase the smear.

Damian has now publicly confirmed that he sent them (in February, when Draper started smearing Dale and Guido as racists).  So why did the Cabinet Office produce some of the emails regarding Dale, but not the ones regarding Guido?  Guido only got emails sent by Draper, not the emails sent by McBride.  Guido has re-submitted an FoI to the Cabinet Office asking again for the emails Damian has now publicly confirmed he sent.

As Guido begins a month at Chateau Fawkes, Damian McBride surfaces to give his first interview. Speaking to the Guardian from a pub, they report

McBride has some unfinished business with “that bloke Fawkes”. “He sent me a text on the day I resigned saying: ‘You started it, I finished it’, he reveals. McBride, however, may not be finished yet.

Charming as ever.

You know Guido can’t be bothered to point to all the self-serving spin in the article. Suffice to say Smeargate wasn’t something put together in a few minutes as he claims, they had many planning meetings, including some at Unite’s HQ with Charlie Whelan in attendance. Lying again, that will be five Hail Marys Damian, what kind of example are you to the boys at Finchley Catholic High School?

Anyway, if Guido was in Damian’s shoes, he’d be more worried about the wrath of Nadine than getting revenge. Now Damian has a job her lawyers will be able to serve her writ at his place of work. They had been unable to locate him, until now…

UPDATE : Interesting that in the Radio 5 interview, Damian refers to the emails to Derek about off colour comments on this blog. When Guido made a Freedom of Information request for those very emails they came back with very little – certainly not the relevant emails.  Guido might have to return to this issue…

Far be it from Guido to advise the blogosphere’s esteemed lister-in-chief on how to make a list, nevertheless it has to be said his list of political Twitterers seems deficient: Boris Johnson is #1 by far with over forty thousand followers.

He has also forgotten Derek Draper with some four thousand followers.  Derek might not have achieved much, but this now silent Twitter feed was very important to him.  Let us not deny him his mega-twittery…

The Telegraph’s Mandrake reckons Damian McBride has got the £22,000 a year job as “Business and Community Manager” at Finchley Catholic High School.  Guido has been keeping an eye on this and as far as he knows it is still not official.  Guido is also keeping an eye on Draper’s status with the British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy – they have yet to arrive at a decision on his professional standing.

Unbelievably Draper has been heard speculating on a possible return to politics.  Absolutely brilliant!

Sadly Guido’s old adversary Derek Draper ducked out of giving us the benefit of his PR and blogging expertise at PR Week’s “new media” conference at the very last moment.  Guido had to improvise his speech since he was expecting to just have another ding-dong with Draper.  Most speakers seemed to be using Draper as a case study in how not to win friends and influence people online. At the conference Guido learnt that LabourHome’s Alex Hilton has gone all corporate and formed a “Digital PR Consultancy” with David Prescott.  So no more monkeying around from him.

Incidentally, the Henry Jackson Society have organised a talk for next Tuesday to which they sent out invitations on Monday.  All tickets went straight away, much to the surprise of the non-partisan society which usually holds dry talks about geo-political flash points like the Middle East.  Such is the demand for tickets the organisers have now moved the event to the biggest room available in Parliament, the Grand Committee room.

When you know that the speakers on the subject of  ‘the internet: saviour or corruptor of democracy?’ include Nick Robinson, Guido and Sir Michael White, you would be right to guess that this could make the Hamas – Likud peace negotiations look calm by comparison.  Unlike Nick, Guido won’t be pulling his punches…

PR Week are holding a fancy New Media and Blogging conference this week with luminaries like DJ Collins from Google speaking (who incidentally was tapped to go spin do “strategic communications” for Downing Street, had drinks with Brown, told Google he was going, but backed out after a turf war with the bunker heavies before actually moving).

Draper has not withdrawn from the line-up the organisers say.  Guido is loooking forward particularly to hearing from Draper how to “Get The Tone Right To Achieve Maximum Coverage” and how to “Perfect your blogger Outreach Strategy”.  Also can’t wait to hear “How to Build Relationships with Bloggers”. Presumably by calling them racists.

Guido will also be speaking at the event on the subject of “sophisticated blogging”.  Honestly.

UPDATE : It is sold out.

Guess that is what happens when you make Derek Draper’s “lunch partner”, James Macintyre, political correspondent.  That source has now dried up…

Last night, as Dale predicted, Draper sent out an email to LabourList subscribers saying that he was stepping down as editor.  No indication as to what has happened to Tom Miller, who aided and abetted Derek in his smear operations.  The new editor, Alex Smith, seems to have decent intentions.  Guido still has some reservations.  Who pays Alex’s wages?  Who funds Tangent Labs development of the rather clunky and overly expensive bespoke software and hosting on which the site runs?   Is Derek still the proprietor?

ConservativeHome and LibDemVoice are much more transparent about funding.  Some clarity from LabourList on this might be a good idea going forward.  Guido genuinely wishes Alex well with the new direction of the site.

Guido is getting worried that we have heard nothing from Dolly for some time.  His Twitter no longer tweets and his belligerent banter has burned out.  His Life Support book is on offer for £2.99 in Oxfam.  It was only a month ago that he was hosting the book’s glittering launch party attended by the likes of the powerful Damian McBride and glamorous Kate Garraway, host of TV’s “The Biggest Loser”.

Please buy his book, Guido is getting worried.

Picture taken yesterday in the Oxfam bookshop on Strutton Ground, Westminster by the Stray Taoist.