Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Cost of Living Crisis Sam Cam

suit

As ever Guido is first with the most important aspect of the PM’s speech. Sam Cam was wearing a dress from Asos, shoes from Topshop and a belt from Fenwick. Guido would wager the belt probably cost more than the rest of it put together. No word on Dave’s suit yet…

Introducing Dave’s Latest Inspirational Slogan

Following on from the resounding success of the Big Society, We’re All In It Together, Aspiration Nation, the Global Race and For Hardworking People, Dave’s latest inspirational slogan is Land of Opportunity. Clearly itself inspired by his Land of Hope and Glory Love Actually moment. Today Cameron will say he wants:

“To make this country, at long last and for the first time ever, a land of opportunity for all. For all. So it makes no difference whether you live in the North or in the South, whether you’re black or you’re white, a man or a woman, the school you went to, the background you have, who your parents were. What matters is the effort you put in, and if you put the effort in you’ll have the chance to make it. That’s what the land of opportunity means.”

Right. It’s basically just Aspiration Nation without the rhyme…

Tuesday, October 1, 2013

How Not to Prepare For the Reshuffle

One Tory who will be nervously awaiting news of the junior ministerial reshuffle is Stephen Hammond. The Transport under-secretary received both barrels from his boss Patrick McLoughlin after telling a fringe event the government is still considering 80mph speed limits. Despite McLoughlin having ruled it out. The Secretary of State wasn’t the only one to vent his anger, Guido is told the PM got involved in the slap down. Going to be an awkward few days…

Dave Doesn’t Know the Price of a Loaf of Bread

bread

A classic doing over of the PM by LBC this morning. “I have a breadmaker at home” is a contender for quote of Tory conference…

Sunday, September 29, 2013

Quote of the Day

David Cameron on Ed Miliband’s speech

“Look, it was a great miracle of memory – he managed to memorise the entire 1983 Labour manifesto and recite it!”

Saturday, September 28, 2013

WATCH: Cameron Tribute to ‘Our Maggie’

A ten minute tribute to coincide with the launch of a Margaret Thatcher shop tomorrow. The Tories are quick to credit Craig Oliver with the idea…

Monday, September 23, 2013

Ed Balls on PM’s Growth

A new low in bad conference jokes: Ed Balls opened with an in depth analysis of the Prime Minister’s private members bill.

After mocking the towel, he pulled the rug from under HS2.

Video via Liar Politicians 

Friday, September 20, 2013

Cameron Caught on Camera in Sister-in-Law’s Bed

SamCam’s sister Alice has now deleted the offending photo of Dave, barefoot, asleep next to his red box. Presumably the PM won’t be rushing to open an Instagram account…

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Dave All Ears For Bunny Funny Apology

Downing Street will have been tearing their hare out at England rugby bad boy Manu Tuilagi’s prank on the PM.

Dave was not thought to be hopping mad.

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Dave PMQs Jibe Helped By Former Tennis Partner Andrew Castle

The PM returned Labour MP Gloria De Piero’s attempt to crowd-source her PMQ on Twitter by referencing the awkward first reply to her tweet. It turns out that reply was from Andrew Castle, her GMTV colleague who used to be Dave’s tennis partner:

Game, set and match…


Seen Elsewhere

Another Feminist Lecture | Laura Perrins
UKIP Posters Bad Economics But Good Politics | James Delingpole
Tories Losing to UKIP in Scotland | ConHome
UKIPers Will Come Home in 2015 | Sun
Tories Set for Thrashing | Sun
Boris Announcement Imminent | Sun
The Case for Splitting Up CCHQ | ConservativeHome
Why UKIP Should Join a ‘European Union’. | Anna Raccoon
Dave’s Brush With Bed Bugs | Speccie
Farage: No Briton Could Be My Secretary | BBC
Dave and George Can Now Be Seen Together | Ben Brogan


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Francis Elliot reports on No. 10 strategy meetings:

“When discussion veers to subjects that Mr Crosby thinks of concern only to the political and journalistic classes, he treats the offender as a pub bore with a tart request to “pass the beer nuts, mate”.”



Alexrod says:

It’s money innit.


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