Monday, June 9, 2014

May SpAd Drove Dre Mad

may

It’s increasingly rare that Craig Oliver has anything to smile about, but he’ll be happy with the exit of Fi Cunningham, who vocalised what most of the SpAds think about the Downing Street Director of Comms. One ‘pal’ told this morning’s Sun: “She thought he was an idiot.” Another described Mr Oliver as “a Grade A ****”.’ As someone with all the authority of a boy scout, who struggles to command respect at the best of times, Cunningham’s attitude drove poor Craig round the bend.

In Sunday’s Sun Guido recounted his favourite tale involving Cunningham repeatedly fobbing off his orders to report to Downing Street for a bollocking. Seeing the No. 10 switchboard number when her phone rang again, she answered: “Sorry, Craig, I’m really busy.” “Get… here… now!” said a voice. She replied: “Right away, Prime Minister.”

Thursday, June 5, 2014

More Want to Leave the EU Than Stay In

President Obama is in Brussels with Dave to tell us how he thinks the British people should be voting. He says Scots should vote no to freedom and that Britain should stay in the EU, haughtily remarking: “I’m sure the people of Britain will make the right decision”. Unfortunately for the President an ITV/ComRes poll out today shows more Britons want to leave the EU than stay in. 42% would vote to leave if there was a referendum tomorrow and just 40% would vote to stay. Sadly Obama didn’t give us his verdict on whether the people of Newark should go for Robert Jenrick or Roger Helmer today…

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Dave Gets Fracked

Last year Greenpeace turned up at George Osborne’s home in Tatton to mock up a huge would-be fracking operation, today they are giving the PM similar treatment. Professor Stephen Hesselbo, of Oxford University’s Earth Sciences department, explains why the science isn’t on Greenpeace’s side:

“It has been known for more than 100 years that the Oxfordshire-Buckinghamshire region is underlain by a variety of sedimentary rocks types, including shale, and locally they have generated gas.”

They are standing in the way of the UK’s dash for gas…

Monday, June 2, 2014

Another Troublesome Peer Leaks Polling Data to Troll Leader

Lord Oakeshott jumped before he was pushed last week, after commissioning unsolicited bad news polling for the  LibDems, but has he set a precedent? Nick Clegg said he thought it ‘totally unacceptable’ that a ‘senior member of the party’ was ‘spending time and money to undermine the fortunes of the party’ and that ‘appropriate measures’ would be taken. Will Dave be so bold in standing up to Tory peer Lord Ashcroft? The billionaire former party donor has been commissioning unhelpful polls left right and centre that suggest a comfortable Labour majority in 2015.

Douglas Alexander MP, Labour’s General Election Strategy, commenting on Ashcroft’s last poll in marginal seats, said gratefully: “Lord Ashcroft’s poll confirms that we are making real progress in seats where we need to do well and that Labour can win next year’s General Election.”

There is an Ashcroft Newark poll out at 4pm…

What ‘appropriate measures’ will the PM be taking with his own troublesome peer?

ConservativeHome Readers Increasingly Favour UKIP Pact

ch-ukip-pact

ConservativeHome’s post Euro elections reader survey shows that the reality of the national vote result was not lost on the site’s readership. Support* for a blue-purple pact has risen…

*Usual caveats about self-selecting samples.

Friday, May 30, 2014

Friday Caption Contest (Yes, Pwime Minister Edition)

This week we have another two tickets to the Freedom Association’s Magna Carta Day pimms and politics boat trip on June 15. It’s a great event with loads of booze and always attracts a strong line up of guests, so the winner is in for a good day out. Details hereMake them witty…

Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Exclusive: Osborne Reveals UKIP Crisis Summit at Chequers

George Osborne has revealed that the Tories held a crisis summit at Chequers this morning on how to deal with the UKIP threat. Both government and party sources refuse to discuss attendees or indeed what was on the agenda. Leaving a breakfast event hosted at No.11 for alumni of Magdalen College, Oxford, the Chancellor explained his premature exit by telling attendees he was taking the unusual step of going to the PM’s official countryside residence in the middle of the week for the meeting. An important pit stop on the way to Newark…

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Cabinet Fall Out Over SpAds Campaigning in Newark

Guido hears there was a bit of a barney at the political cabinet last Tuesday. The PM made it perfectly clear that he expects all of his colleagues to pull their weight in the Newark by-election and one claims that Dave “lost his rag” about taxpayer funded special advisers refusing to campaign. Guido understands there has been a bit of an email revolt to No. 10 by uppity SpAds who resent not getting a cheeky day off while their bosses tour the Nottinghamshire seat. When one Secretary of State gently pointed out to the PM that the civil service code of conduct bans SpAds from the stump, the PM’s ‘tiredness’ did not improve one little bit. Anyone would think he was encouraging them to ignore the rules…

UPDATE:

Friday, May 16, 2014

Friday Caption Contest (Questionable Selfie Technique Edition)

The winner of today’s caption contest gets themselves a copy of Lord Tebbit’s brand new book Ben’s Story.

It is about a radioactive telekinetic Russian dog. Really.

Only entries in the comments will be accepted…

Via @Hide_ItsHannah

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Farage: I’d Do a Deal With Dave

The Sun cabbie is back to grill each party leader ahead of the Euros. Today he has Nigel Farage in the back of his cab, and got him to commit to doing a deal with David Cameron if the numbers mean they could deliver a referendum:

Watch the Sun cabbie’s interview with Nigel Farage in full HERE.

“After the next election, if we find ourselves in the same position as Clegg did in 2010, I’ve got one priority. One pressing priority. That is, no mucking about, the people of this country have to have in short order a full, free and fair referendum so that we can decide whether we govern our own country or leave it to the people of Brussels to make all our rules. It’s not coalition that interests me, but doing deals on certain things to achieve outcomes, particularly that, does.

He must have seen the polls…


Seen Elsewhere

Harriet Harman Offers Less Than the Living Wage | Owen Bennett
Fallon’s Red Arrow Spin Unravels | Wings Over Scotland
What is the LibDems’ Problem With “The Jews” | Speccie
Image is the Least of Ed’s Worries | Speccie
The Most Politically Cynical Speech I Have Ever Seen | Dan Hodges
Full Sunday Sport Style Guide Email | MediaGuido
What if a Hamas Rocket Hit a BA Plane? | Richard Littlejohn
Sunday Sport Swearing Style Guide | Popbitch
Tory MP’s Love of Astrology | BBC
No.10 Shouldn’t Get Excited at Growth Figures | Mark Wallace
Feminist Lobby Killing Meritocracy | Kathy Gyngell


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New Foreign Secretary Philip Hammond has big ambitions in his first meeting with Benjamin Netanyahu today:

“I came to bring this conflict to an end.”



Christie Malry @fcablog

Ed Miliband does photo oops, not photo ops


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