Tuesday, January 27, 2015

100 Days to Go and Tories STILL have 96 Candidates to Select

Research shows that with 100 days to go, the Tories are still short a whopping 97 candidates. Almost a sixth of all seats…

Even if you subtract Northern Ireland, there are still 79 candidate-less seats with just a couple of months to go.

Number crunching by Peter Botting and Anthony Gearing can be found here.

There are some surprisingly marginal seats still looking for Tory representation…

UPDATE: Hold the front page… Guido is informed it’s actually 95 seats. CCHQ’s very own top spinner Richard Holden was recently selected in Preston…

UPDATE II: 5 unwinnable Scottish seats have also selected. Panic over…

UPDATE III: CCHQ claim it is only 40 odd seats that have no candidate. They have yet to send over the numbers and they seem to be missing from their own Conservatives.com website…

Monday, January 26, 2015

WATCH: David Cameron Explains That Hoax Call

Friday, January 23, 2015

Who Said It: King Abdullah or ISIS?

WATCH: Daily Politics on Nando’s v Harvester

The King is Dead, Long Live the Regime – David Cameron

David Cameron is in full on gush mode:

“I am deeply saddened to hear of the death of the Custodian of the Two Holy Mosques, His Majesty King Abdullah bin Abd Al Aziz Al Saud. He will be remembered for his long years of service to the Kingdom, for his commitment to peace and for strengthening understanding between faiths. My thoughts and prayers are with the Saudi Royal Family and the people of the Kingdom at this sad time. I sincerely hope that the long and deep ties between our two Kingdoms will continue and that we can continue to work together to strengthen peace and prosperity in the world.”

So anyway, here are the Saudis cutting off a woman’s head in the street last week:

Meanwhile Saudi blogger Raif Badawi faces another 950 lashes as soon as his initial 50 have healed enough.

Scumbags.

Thursday, January 22, 2015

PM’s Statement on Leon Brittan

“Leon Brittan was a dedicated and fiercely intelligent public servant. As a central figurein Margaret Thatcher’s government, he helped her transform our country for the better by giving distinguished service as Chief Secretary to the Treasury, Home Secretary and Secretary of State for Trade and Industry. He went on to play a leading role at the European Commission where he did so much to promote free trade in Europe and across the world. More recently, he made an active contribution to the House of Lords. My thoughts are with Leon’s family and friends at this sad time.”

He would have been fully briefed before giving this statement…

UPDATE: It took Clegg four hours to release his statement:

“Leon was one of the most intelligent figures in modern British public life.

When I worked for Leon in Brussels almost 20 years ago, his forensic understanding of detailed issues combined with his passionate belief in internationalism was evident to everyone.

His courage in sticking up for his pro-European views, despite huge pressure to the contrary, never wavered.

His intellectual curiosity about politics; the arts; history; and literature was encyclopedic. Even as illness affected him badly in recent years, he kept up his lifelong habit of reading a constant flow of books on a huge range of subjects.

My heart goes out to Diana Brittan and Leon’s family at this very sad time.”

Wednesday, January 21, 2015

GUIDO POLL: Foreign Nando’s V British Harvester

The PM has claimed that foreign food from Nando’s is better value than a good old British Harvester. He probably focus grouped his answers, but is he out of touch?

CALL ME DAVE: I Like Hip Hop, Nandos & Bryan Ferry

The PM just popped up on Capital Xtra for a particuarly cringeworthy interview. The last three minutes are golden as “Dave” fails a test to see if he’s as cool as Obama. Guido managed to record a copy before it mysteriously disappeared from the internet:

He prefers cooking shows to the Kardashians, Bryan Ferry over Tinie Tempah and wants everyone to call him Dave…

UPDATE: Full transcript:

Capital: You’ve just had a hard PMQs. You pop along to the office and turn on the TV. Only reality shows are on. Now which one do you watch: Big Brother?

DC: No.

Capital: Love and Hip Hop?

DC: No.

Capital: Or Keeping Up With the Kardashians?

DC: I think – whoops, I’ve just dropped the microphone in shock at that question. I’m not a big brother fan, I have watched it. I haven’t quite got into why everyone’s interested in the Kardashians, so I’m not doing very well on that one. So maybe I’ll try the hip hop show, that sounds a bit better. I like watching cooking shows.

Capital: Barack Obama suggests you need a big artist to pull back the youth vote, so he suggests that he’s gonna bring in Jay-Z for you.

DC: Right.

Capital: Prime Minister Tony Abbott calls from Australia and says Iggy Azalea is the way forward.

DC: Right.

Capital: Or do you go safe and call up Tinie Tempah and get the UK on track?

DC: I don’t know, the track I would like to have – but this makes me sound so old – is Let’s Stick Together by Bryan Ferry, because I think that’s the message for the election.

Capital: One more question. Everyone’s over in London for the G7 summit. It’s up to you to order lunch. Do you go to Harvester, the Gordon Ramsay pub or get some chicken in from Nando’s.

DC: I’ve been to a Gordon Ramsay restaurant, I’ve been to Nando’s and I’ve been to a Harvester. I think Nando’s is the best value for money. I had a very good Nando’s in Bristol.

UPDATE II: Nigel Farage slams Cameron, telling Guido: “Harvester over Nando’s any day, but if you ask me a good local pub can’t be beat.”

UPDATE III: Ed Balls weighs in, he prefers Little Chef:

“My kids like Nando’s, I haven’t been a regular at Harvester.”

Friday, January 16, 2015

Digital Dave Isn’t Working

dave 1776

The Prime Minister was keen to show off his enthusiasm for all things digital today when he stopped by 1776, a “global platform for connecting entrepreneurs”, in DC. “So how do we un-encrypt this…”

Dave: Obama Does Call Me Bro


Seen Elsewhere

Users of Gay Hook-Up App Grindr Infected | TechnoGuido
ISIS Raising Funds Online Using Bitcoin | TechnoGuido
UKIP’s Youth Challenge | BBC
ISIS Operative: This Is How We Send Jihadis To Europe | BuzzFeed
Shapps Defends Bashir Defection | Seb Payne
Tory Leadership Contenders Jostle Over Europe | Alex Wickham
Cutting Taxes is Good For You | Art Laffer
Suspects Will Now Have to Prove Innocence | Laura Perrins
Labour Cllr: Cops Shouldn’t Stop Petrol Thieves | HandF Forum
Creeping Cultural Acceptance of Anti-Semitism | Eric Pickles
Time For Greece to Leave Eurozone | Allister Heath


Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS


Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”


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