Who Could Succeed Spelman?

If Caroline Spelman does lose her job – noticeably Dave has not come out and given her fulsome support yet – who will succeed her as Tory Chairman? Speculation is rising.

The job is not what it was in the glory days of Parkinson and Tebbit. Ashcroft’s team does process and the nitty gritty of the campaign machine in marginals, Osborne is charge of general election strategy. Betting is on Eric Pickles or Chris Grayling. Both popular with the activists, Pickles is adored and is basking in the post by-election glory. Grayling is fantastically good at taking the fight to Labour. He isn’t afraid of Paxman and comes over well on the news shows. Spelman on the other hand has only registered with the public now and for the wrong reasons…

Blue-on-Blue or Red Dragons?

Post-lunch Guido peruses Nadine’s blog to discover a picture of her comely researcher, one Jenny Dorries, and Nadine has this to say:
If Michael Crick or any other journalist would like to check it out she is working from my staff office, just be our guest. Is there a better communication tool than a blog?

No of course not, so Guido calls Nadine’s office; “Is Jenny there?” “No she has just popped out” comes the reply. Guido leaves his number for her to call back. Seconds pass… ring, ring. A lioness roars down the line in tones that remind Guido of Mrs Fawkes. Nadine is not impressed. Guido protests that she did invite calls. She also complains about the blog’s coverage of Caroline Spelman. Guido points out she never called about Guido’s coverage of Beckett’s pergola or Follet’s window cleaning at our expense. We agree to differ.

Elsewhere on her blog Nadine laments

“The frenzied attack against Conservative MPs and MEPs, orchestrated by and emanating from the left wing BBC and press has equalled that of an animal in its death throes. The more terminal the position looks for Labour, the more desperate the BBC and left wing press become. The incoming Conservative government has many big dragons to slay, the BBC has to be the biggest.”

Yes, Guido and those horrible left-wingers at Open Europe must be desperately trying to prop up the Labour Party. Guido wonders aloud to Nadine whether, just maybe, Spelman’s troubles might come from another direction, after all, the Whip’s office knew of her misdemeanor, perhaps others in CCHQ knew as well? Some of those Tory MEPs she was threatening have been around a while, they are not entirely without friends – people do gossip – black books are kept. Maybe they also knew Michael Crick’s phone number? Isn’t it more likely to be Blue-on-Blue shooting than originating from the BBC’s red dragons? Nadine went quiet for a moment… briefly.

There Will Be Blue Blood On the Floor

Guido has bad news for Tory MEPs caught fiddling their expenses, he is reliably informed that Cameron is inclined to take a tough line on them – including sacking as official candidates – a move that will be hugely popular with grassroots Tories.

Such is the strength of feeling in the Conservative Party that outraged Tory councillors and activists in Giles Chichester’s own constituency plan to go public with their disgust if he goes unpunished. There is unlikely to be much mercy shown to troughing MEPs from Tory MPs in Westminster who resent the luxurious gravy train of their continental counterparts. In CCHQ Andy Coulson “wants a bloodbath” in Brussels…

Image courtesy of The Lakelander

+++ Tories Send CCHQ Compliance Hit Squad to Brussels +++

De-Googlisation?

It is all very well CCHQ’s spinmeister, Steve Hilton, following his partner, Google’s spinmeister Rachel Whetstone, off to California – he can time shift his remote control of the Tories whilst waiting for Rachel’s stock options to vest. The much more important question: Who is Guido going to call now if the blogger software plays up?

Tories Told to Stop Laundering Frontbench Cash Through CCHQ

The Tories say that they sought clarification of the rules only to discover that their interpretation was incorrect. That is a patently disingenuous explanation. Osborne’s office was found by the Mail on Sunday to have had half-a-million of support from donors channelled quietly via CCHQ. Osborne’s office nervously sought clarification of the rules only after the Abrahams proxy donor scandal. The authorities gave them muddled advice which got them off a sticky wicket. In reality anyone honest in politics knows the rules are there to provide transparency, if you are acting opaquely you know it is wrong even if it is legal. The public want to know who is paying so we can judge if policy or favours are being bought.

It turns out that the Tory frontbench is awash with covert cash from vested interests. Mortgage brokers funding the office of the Housing Shadow is pertinent. Cameron gave a high ground speech promising transparency and openness only two months ago. Well get on with it. If this is the finest democracy that money can buy, we want to know at least who is doing the paying. No more shadowy cash, if public money is paying we want receipts for every last single penny.

“Follow the money” is the basic rule of politics, where does the private money come from, where does the public money go? Not hard to understand is it? If donors don’t like publicity, don’t donate…

Hague : Lost in Africa

CCHQ sends a press release:
Shadow Foreign Secretary William Hague, has today called on David Miliband to take urgent action with regard to the Chinese ship, currently heading to Uganda carrying arms bound for Zimbabwe.

Guido suggests the Shadow Foreign Secretary need not lose any sleep over Chinese ships heading to Uganda. Just a hunch…

Kick in the Balls

This is pretty addictive – a role playing game. Once you master the keyboard skills you (as Jack Straw) can head butt, kick, punch, round house, upper cut, right hook, elbow on jump on Ed Balls. The parliamentary web-servers are overloaded with players this morning…

This game has been produced by Her Majesty’s Official Opposition. The Guidoisation of democracy continues…

Doh!


Kevin Maguire’s made up story, Kirkup’s speculation, Sam Coates’ blog. Doh!

[…]

+ READ MORE +

CCHQ Designated Party Poopers Tonight

CCHQ are having their Christmas party tonight. Somebody is worried that the boys and girls will get out of hand. Surely not, this isn’t the Bullingdon Club after all…

Dear All,

HR have just had a word with me regarding

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Tory Spin Breaks Fundamental Rule

CCHQ have just sent out a “Why, oh why” press release about the OFT ruling from the shadow Farms Minister, James Paice, headlined “The price of milk should not be fixed”.

There really is no point crying over this…

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Unhappy Halloween

Gove does the intellectual attack muttering about a sad loss of idealism one minute, next minute CCHQ rolls out this poster to commemorate non-election day. Coulson wouldn’t have had a hand in this would he?

[…]

+ READ MORE +



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