Lest we forget the 13 years before the last 100 days…
Lest we forget the 13 years before the last 100 days…
Though no longer a front-bencher, or even a participating Member of Parliament, Gordon has found it necessary to recruit a PPS. Alison McGovern, newly elected MP for Wirral South, has been appointed bag-carrier-in-chief . While he sits at home in Fife, rocking, back and forth, spinning his disastrous economic record, she will be working in Westminster on his behalf. Why can’t he do it? Guido recommends she spend more time shoring up her own ultra-marginal constituency.
Tony is off to Kosovo today to receive the Golden Medal of Freedom. He will meet leaders and address their Assembly. No expense is being spared for their hero’s welcome, although he won’t be offered honorary tribal membership as he was in Sierra Leone. While unwanted and still hated by swathes of his own country, the Blair magic is undiminished on the international stage.
‘Tonibler’ is a popular name for young Kosovans, and he has streets named after him. Guido is racking his brains as to where in the world his successor would receive anything other than polite applause…
UPDATE: While Blair might be popular, a Kosovan co-conspirator notes that he has a long way to go to beat Clinton as a local hero:
Blair doesn’t even have his own scrapyard in Pristina named after him yet.
Given his willingness to use it for his own advantage whenever he was attempting his salt-of-the-earth, dyed-in-the-wool working class act, you would think that Tony Blair would have a little more concern for the fate of Trimdon Labour Club. His own authoritarian smoking legislation is to blame for the club being forced out of business and it is set to close. Perhaps he could dip into his pockets, or perhaps one of his off-shore trusts, for a little assistance to keep it afloat. Come on our Tony give something back t’Labour.
The British public clearly have a longer memory than the Labour Party would like, even their own most loyal apparatchiks have mixed feelings about the return of Blair. Despite the billing that this was to be a swinging attack at Cameron, old Tony refused to personally attack his political heir: Dave. Instead he chose to meekly go after wonky Oliver Letwin about market forces in the public services – something New Labour was built on.
He also suggested that Labour had never used the ”vacuous” slogan “time for a change“, Guido begs to differ and wonders what Tony’s good chum Obama would have to say about that. Looking more orange than even Peter Hain, Guido suspects we won’t be seeing much more of Blair in the run up to polling day – not with the 50% tax rate and everything. He’ll resist the temptation to upstage Brown, it would in any event tarnish his reputation as a thrice-proven election winner to be associated with Brown…
Back in September Guido asked:
When was the last time you saw Tony Blair in the UK? Billionaire’s yachts in the Med, sure, US TV chat shows, sure. Six-figure speaking engagements in the Far East, of course. “Peacemaking” in the Middle East, allegedly. Is he seen in the UK? No, not much.
Guido’s theory is that he is keeping under the 90 day residency limit for non-residence for tax purposes. Didn’t Cherie mention that the kids all have Irish passports?
Well not much has changed, apart from his appearance at the Chilcot Inquiry when was the last time anyone saw Blair in London? Seems like a fair question today.
Having claimed that the Iraq Inquiry had been called to satisfy conspiracy theorists, Guido understands that Tony Blair has been sending hand-written letters to some of his closet allies and pals who defended him in the run up to, and after, his Chilcot performance. As well as thanking them for their loyal on-screen defences of him, he called the legitimacy of the inquiry into question with an aside that the whole process has been “most improper – but anyway, I survived.”
Who was it that said Chilcot wasn’t a waste of time?
This is the big day for the chattering classes. Today at the Chilcot Inquiry the unreconciled anti-war left hopes Blair will trip up and effectively confess to war crimes, the commentariat are looking for closure – “the questions Blair must answer”, Hampstead and Islington intellectuals are looking for new material for after-dinner arguments. Cameroons will look on misty-eyed as the maestro shows how it is done. There will be something for everyone today. In the end, after six hours of testimony, Guido reckons Blair will walk away with his reputation unchanged. No one will change their mind as a result of Blair’s testimony today. Nevertheless for the political classes today is the super-bowl of political self-justification.
A co-conspirator draws Guido’s attention to Swindon Wide’s reporting of the upcoming ‘Swindon Festival of Literature’. Undoubtedly one of the cultural highlights of the year. Cherie will really have to prostitute herself somewhat to push her book, she got a reported £1 million advance and it has sold a mere 33,000 copies.
Guido knows Cherie has a reputation for money grubbing, but even so, the headline is a little unfair…
Maggie and Mandela | Charles Moore
Mandela was Christ-Like | Peter Oborne
Maggie Personally Donated £20,000 to Mandela Foundation | Bono
Why Environmentalists Should Favour Fracking | CPS
Balls Gag Falls Flat | Asa Bennett
Mandela the Thatcherite | John Pilger
Balls’ Heckling Hypocrisy | Isabel Hardman
Gordon Dinner Raises Just $350 | Trending Central
Labour Need Darling to Replace Balls | Peter Oborne
Osborne Will Have to Push Harder Than This | Fraser Nelson
No, Cameron Did Not Make Hang Mandela Posters | Buzzfeed
Nelson Mandela on Margaret Thatcher, July 1990…
“She is an enemy of apartheid… We have much to thank her for.”