Tuesday, September 9, 2014

Miliband Fails to Land Big Hitting Telly Spinner
Former Mandelson Protégé Joins Team Ed

Ed Miliband has failed to secure a much needed broadcast news expert to help his struggling TV presence. Having doubled the initial offering of around £45,000, made back in March, Labour have had to settle for a former One Show, Politics Show and Westminster Hour producer whose previous image making skills honed Gloria Hunniford. Perhaps it was his experience on “Rip Off Britain” that tipped the balance in his favour. Labour were ideally seeking the services of a frontline broadcast news expert. Friends describe Matthew Laza as a ‘good New Labour man, through and through.’

Slipped in under the cover of the Scottish chaos and a royal baby six months late and hardly a hire to set conference season alight. One of the biggest obstacles to finding someone for the gig was that no one wanted to risk ruining their reputation for less than a year in one of the toughest jobs in politics – making Ed look normal eating:

Laza does have some image issues of his own, having recently gone a bit Bullingdon in an upmarket Manchester restaurant popular with BBC luvvies:

degrees-restaurant

Laza’s appointment comes on the back of his ‘old mate’ Gloria De Piero joining Labour’s election team. The two are said to enjoy a shared curiosity in German socialism. Though his bona fide New Labourism does not end there. The former NOLS activist is alumni of the Blairite €uro-loving campaign group Britain In Europe, Guido understands that Peter Mandelson took a special interest in personally tutoring a young Laza in every aspect of the dark arts…

Friday, August 15, 2014

Beeb Cliff Spin Mystery

Earlier today, the BBC’s “head of newsgathering” sought to counter speculation about how the Beeb managed to get camera crews down to Cliff Richard’s apartment in time to film the police walking in:

This afternoon, South Yorkshire Police released this statement:

“When a media outlet contacted SYP with information about an investigation, we took the decision to work with them in order to protect the integrity of that investigation.

“Since the search took place a number of people have contacted the police to provide information and we must acknowledge that the media played a part in that, for which we are grateful.”

‘Ello, ‘ello, ‘ello, what’s all this then?

BBC Face Fight to Keep Gobby

Everybody’s favourite BBC field man might not be at the Beeb for much longer. Paul Lambert, known affectionately as Gobby for his polite and understated questioning style, could soon be snapped up by a rival. Friends tell MediaGuido changes to the BBC’s pension scheme have left the old guard weighing up their options, 57 year old Gobby among them. Still feared by politicians all the way to Downing Street, he would surely be snared by Sky or ITN in no time. Prize for the first person to shout “Are you going to resign, Gobby?”

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Loony LibDem Candidate Boycotts BBC Over Gaza

Where do the LibDems find ‘em? The party’s ambitious candidate to be Police and Crime Commissioner for the West Midlands, who was given a glowing reference on LibDemVoice just a few weeks ago, is something of a wannabe David Ward. Ayoub Khan has shown his campaigning genius by boycotting the BBC over their “biased” coverage of Gaza:

FROM: Ayoub Khan
TO: Kathryn Stanczyszyn
11 August 2014

Whilst it is in the interest of any candidate to promote themselves and attract voter support on mainstream media, particularly in a by-election, I have decided not to do this with the BBC because their broadcasting of the Gaza situation has been biased. One has to live with ones own conscience and I refuse to participate with organisations such as the BBC who in the view of so many, have acted in such an unfair manner.

Barrister Khan’s other credentials include being accused of lying in court, while on his website he modestly says: “Some people call me a hero, but I just did what anyone would do.” You have to wonder what BBC journalists risking risking their lives in Gaza think about being called Israeli propagandists by armchair activists back in Britain…

Monday, July 21, 2014

Evan Davis New Newsnight Presenter

Friday, July 18, 2014

BBC Justifies Telly Poll Tax By Claiming Poor Watch More TV

The BBC claims that the licence fee poll tax is justified because poor people watch more television than better off households. With Director General Tony Hall appearing in front of the DCMS select committee this week, the Beeb’s Director of Policy James Heath blogged that a flat rate licence fee is fair on the poor because they watch so much TV:

“The argument for a uniform fee is that there is a direct link between the level of the service received by everyone, and the level of the charge made on everyone. While the licence fee does constitute a higher proportion of lower households’ expenditure, these households also consume more BBC TV than richer households.  As a proportion of household spending, the licence fee is lower than expenditure on many other household items, including transport services, communications, and fuel. Over the last five years the cost of many household items has gone up significantly in real terms while the cost of the licence fee has declined. The licence free represents a very small percentage of household expenditure – even for the lowest income decile, on average, the licence fee is around 1 percent of household spending.”

Dismissing people on a low incomes as a bunch of idle, square-eyed couch potatoes hardly seems in keeping with the liberal, progressive values of Aunty Beeb. If a right-winger patronised less well-off people by telling them a flat tax was value for money because they spend so much time in front of the telly, the Today programme would be in uproar…

Friday, July 11, 2014

BBC’s Chris Mason Goes on a Stag Do

Lad.

WATCH: Question Time’s Passionate Highlander

Those who wish to deny freedom for Scotland have so far failed to convince in terms of the emotional argument, so they could do worse than listen to this “passionate highlander” on Question Time last night:

Fightin’ talk…

Wednesday, July 9, 2014

The Lord Works in Mysterious Ways

For the first time ever, Chris Patten has acknowledged that there is an earthly being higher even than him. Fat Pang has taken a job as a spinner for the Pope, where among other things he will advise His Holiness on how to make his Twitter account a bit less… Pope-y. Good thing he has plenty of experience working for an organisation with an impressive record at covering up child abuse…

Another Innocent Politician Accused on Newsnight

In their defence, this one was hardly their fault. On last night’s programme, Neil Hamilton accused a former Labour MP of being into kinky sex. Neil Hamilton being Neil Hamilton, he got the wrong one, and Newsnight have now apologised:

“In a live Newsnight interview about party whips’ knowledge of MPs’ personal secrets tonight, former Tory whip Neil Hamilton referred to a former Labour MP, now dead, who he said had been known to visit “bondage and sado masochism clubs and behaved in the most outrageous way.” 

Mr Hamilton incorrectly named the MP as Allan Rogers, who is former MP for the Rhondda. Mr Hamilton says he meant to refer to another former MP, now dead. Mr Hamilton said: “I apologise unreservedly to Allan Rogers. It was an inadvertent slip of the tongue.” Newsnight also apologises to Mr Rogers.”

Whoops!


Seen Elsewhere

Osborne’s Daycare Obsession is a Time Bomb | Kathy Gyngell
BBC Marr Pinko Trying to Ban the Queen | Speccie
Eric Hobsbawm: Companion of Dishonour | Standpoint
Guido Party Gossip | Iain Dale
Russell Brand Comes Out as 9/11 Truther | Guardian
Health Revolution is Underway | Fraser Nelson
UKIP Gets Professional | Red Box
Kelly Tolhurst Wins Rochester Open Primary | BBC
No.10 Ambushed by EU Prosperity Tax | Times
10 Years of Guido | Iain Dale
Tory MP Tells Leftie Jon Snow to Retire | Guardian


VOTER-RECALL
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Rob Colvile reviews Russell Brand’s new book:

“Oddly, the person I feel sorriest for isn’t Brand himself – although he certainly comes across as a rather pitiable figure, projecting his own brokenness on to the world around him – but Johann Hari. Drummed out of Fleet Street for plagiarism, the former Independent columnist has washed up as “my mate Johann, who’s been doing research for this book”. For a genuinely talented polemicist, it would have been a humbling experience to have to treat this sub-undergraduate dross as the scintillating wisdom of a philosopher-king.”



Mycroft says:

Have you read the last bit of Animal Farm?

You know where the animals are looking through the Farmhouse window?

My TV screen was that window at lunch-time today.

Be careful, the sudden self-congratulatory tone, the slightly pudgy outline of indulgence and you become exactly what you should despise.

The jolly face of the Quisling Cameron poses for your camera has mesmerised and deceived you, you who were once not so deceived.

You were no firebrand, you were a damp squib in my opinion, sorry.

You need a damned good kick up the ahse!


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