Tuesday, June 24, 2014

SKETCH: The Ghost of Coulson Reaches Treasury Questions

Treasury questions began with the single most depressing sentence that can fall on Labour ears. The fact is, Osborne declared, we are experiencing the fastest growth in employment since records began.

What a terrible time to fight an election from the left – its ideology is being cut to ribbons by events.

In a time of public sector cuts, employment is unaccountably soaring.

Tax cuts are perversely producing higher tax revenues.

Austerity refuses to stifle growth even though anyone who is anyone knows it must.

And while the Right keeps talking about its long term economic plan (14 mentions today), the Left has neither a long term communications strategy – or even a short term one (their Leader’s Welfare reforms from last week: 0 mentions).

Ed Balls looked like the stuffing had been knocked out of him. That’s a lot of stuffing. (more…)

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Balls Told Constituents He Would Fight Zero Hours Contracts
Then Employed Four Zero Hours Staff Himself Last Year

Talking to his constituents last year Ed Balls railed against so-called zero-hours contracts, launching a stinging attack in the Morley Observer & Advertiser:

Just in this area, thousands are working with this kind of contract. It puts a real strain on working families and cause huge anxiety and uncertainty. Each week they don’t know whether there will be enough work to feed their kids or pay for childcare.

I want to see this issue looked at properly and action taken so that these kinds of contracts are the exception rather than the rule. It’s no way for Britain to compete in the global economy in the 21st century. Anyone who’s affected and wants me to look into their case should get in touch by emailed ed@edballs.com or call 0113 253 9466.”

Stern words.

The Sun today reveals that Balls has employed four workers on zero-hours contracts in the last year. Indeed, out of the 62 Labour MPs who employed parliamentary staff on zero-hours contracts in 2013, the Shadow Chancellor was one of the biggest users. His spokesman Alex Belardinelli is trying to spin away the screw-up by arguing: “on advice of IPSA we use their casual contracts solely to allow us to pay living wage to interns & students on temp placements”. That doesn’t even make sense; temp contracts can of course specify hours. Nor is IPSA advice mandatory, if they told Balls to send his staffers up the chimneys would he do that too? Balls tells his constituents to give his office a ring if they have been affected by zero-hours contracts. Chances are the phone will be answered by someone who is on one too…

Fortunately, the Shadow Chancellor has a defender in the Institute of Directors:

“The fact that so many students and young people are employed by Labour MPs in this way further undermines the calls from the far left to ban such contracts all together. Thankfully, cooler heads have prevailed and the Labour policy on Zero Hours Contracts is now pretty sensible. Just don’t tell Oxfam…”

A welcome change in policy…

Monday, June 2, 2014

Voter Blanks Balls, Shadow Chancellor Tries to Play It Cool

‘Are you buying fish’, he asks while pointing at garlic bread…

Friday, May 30, 2014

WATCH: Balls Blocked From Bilderberg

The fearless truth seekers at InfoWars have captured the moment Ed Balls turned up at the Bilderberg conference in Copenhagen, only to be turned away by police at the gates who didn’t recognise who he was. The Shadow Chancellor apparently couldn’t find his invite. Despite his protestations that “that’s my name, I’m on the list to attend,” the guards wouldn’t let him in.

Your name’s not down, you’re not coming in.

Thursday, May 15, 2014

The Balls Offensive

With Ed Balls dissing Douglas Alexander on LBC last night, this morning his wife Yvette Cooper has launched another broadside against the embattled election coordinator. As Guido reported earlier in the week, Alexander is under attack internally from the likes of Michael Dugher for not “taking the fight to UKIP”, and today that row has spilled over to the pages of the Mirror:

“Like their plans for NHS charges or millionaire tax cuts, UKIP’s Thatcherite policies are worse than David Cameron’s. Pulling out of Europe won’t help. That risks jobs. Better to get EU reforms – including better controls when countries join.

We mustn’t ignore UKIP … nor must we imitate them – we are challenging all the other parties because they have no answers to help working people.”

Finally it appears at least one faction in Labour has noticed the party ahead of them in the EU polling rather than being obsessed by the one languishing in last place. Looks a lot like a coordinated Balls camp shift…

Friday, May 9, 2014

Balls Charged for Hit and Run
Coppers Bring Charges After Story Changes

The Shadow Chancellor blogs this afternoon:

“I’d been turning our car round in a tight spot in the narrow private drive beside the Labour rooms in Morley where I park all the time. Another car was parked close by and I was aware the two bumpers touched. But I had no idea any damage had been done until the police got in touch a week later.

As soon as I was aware any damage had been done I immediately took full responsibility for any damage caused. I’ve been in touch with the owner to apologise for the inconvenience and to  pay for the repair to the marks on the parked car’s bodywork.

The police have to do their job. Once I’d confirmed I knew the bumpers had touched, their standard approach is to proceed to charge as they expect people to stop and check.

I fully understand and accept that, so of course I will be accepting the charge. While I had no knowledge at the time that any damage had occured, I accept their view that I should have checked. Getting points on my licence will be a blow – but that’s the way it works.”

Busted…

Balls has changed his tune slightly. When the police began their investigation he claimed “As soon as I was made aware of what had happened, I took full responsibility for any damage caused.” Yet now he admits he knew the collision had happened at the time…

UPDATE:

Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Ed Balls Lies He Had No Role in Co-Op Britannia Merger…
But Claimed Credit for Deal in 2010

In his interview on Channel 4 News last Night Ed Balls told Cathy Newman:

“I had no role at all in the Co-op bank’s merger with Britannia… That’s a Tory smear, it’s entirely untrue.”

Yet in this blogpost written in September 2010, Balls claimed credit for the deal:

“I was also able to give the Treasury’s support for a new Private Members Bill that led to the creation of the first ever ‘super-mutual’ bringing Britannia Building Society and the Co-op Bank together in the interests of customers, rather than the banking elite.”

Look into Blinky Balls’ eyes as he deceives the nation…

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Quote of the Day

Ed Balls at Treasury questions:

“If this chancellor wants a discussion about whiplash, Mr Speaker, we can do that any day of the week. Mister, Mrs or Mistress – but let’s not go back to the biographies of the past.”

Balls’ GDP Nightmare

The shadow chancellor’s Ed Balls Day hangover has not been helped by this morning’s positive GDP figures. One phrase stood out in his response to the news:

“Now that growth has finally returned, the question is whether ordinary working people will properly feel the benefit and we have a balanced recovery that’s built to last… 

And with business investment still weak, infrastructure output down and housing demand outstripping housing supply, this is not yet a recovery that is built to last.

Labour’s plan will ensure we earn our way to higher living standards for all, not just a few at the top, and secure a strong and balanced recovery that is built to last.”

“Built to last” was the phrase used by Balls that led to Miliband advisers Torsten Bell and Greg Beales calling him a “nightmare” in those awkward leaked emails last year. This morning he used it three times in five lines…

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Balls Flees Crash Scene
Police Probing Ed Balls Car Smash Dash

Ed Balls has picked up another trick from his political father Gordon Brown – going missing, Macavity style, from the scene of a crime. The Shadow Chancellor hit another car in Morley on April 5 but sped off in his Peugeot 306 without contacting the owner or leaving his insurance details. He was only caught by CCTV.

The Yorkshire Post reports that the police have launched an investigation. According to West Yorkshire Police:

We received a report on Sunday, April 6, of a fail-to-stop collision on Commercial Street, Morley, which is reported to have happened the day before on Saturday, April 5. Damage was caused to the front offside wing of a parked black Peugeot 306. Enquiries are ongoing.”

Of course this is not the first time Balls has got into trouble behind the wheel. He claims:

“As soon as I was made aware of what had happened, I took full responsibility for any damage caused.”

Not a mantra he applies to the economy, sadly.


Seen Elsewhere

‘Queers for Palestine’ | Milo Yiannopoulos
Tories Attack Labour on Tax | Mark Wallace
UKIP No Flash In Pan | Matthew Goodwin
12 Signs It’s Time to Get Out of Gaza | Slate
Mars Lawyers Slam Plain Packaging | CityAM
HealthCare.gov Construction Cost $840 Million | Wall Street Journal
Why Do Feminists Oppose Stay-at-Home Mothers? | Laura Perrins
Chris Cook’s “Excellent Journalism” | Iain Dale
The Deficit Hasn’t Gone Away | Tim Montgomerie
Doctors Against Burnham | Mail
Privatisation is Good for the NHS | John McTernan


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Knifed former civil service chief Bob Kerslake on his recent troubles:

“Many thks for kind wishes following back opn. Incision measured 16cm. A pretty big knife in the back! Photos on request.”



TJ says:

And i’ve noticed that 100% of Guido Fawkes staff are men. Looks like Guido has a woman problem. Or is it an hypocrisy problem?


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