Despite assuring us that he intended to disappear into the obscurity of the lefty charity world, the horror of Gordon becoming the head of the IMF somehow seems possible. On manoeuvres in Bretton Woods, Brown has been lobbying, without a trace of irony, to take the leadership of the body which is charged with managing deficits in cash strapped countries. Another week where the people of Kirkcaldy have been well represented in Parliament. 

Guido isn’t so sure he’s quite the shoe in that he is briefing he is, though perhaps they were impressed with his prudent management style and understanding of how governments can rack up such huge debts. Osborne’s people have made it clear that they would block the £270,000 pa appointment: ”It would be an insult to the British public if Gordon Brown were to be put forward for this job. This is the man who wrecked the British economy and has never apologised. It is not going to happen on our watch.”

Guido won’t be buying back those Nokia shares just yet.

If his first couple of months as a football executive are anything to go by, part-time MP David Miliband might want not want to give up the day-job just yet. On February 1st the lamenting Labour loser joined the board of Sunderland Association Football Club. Things were looking up with a 2:1 win against Blackburn on the weekend before. In the seven games since though, Sunderland have lost six and drawn one. The 0:0 draw was against Arsenal, the team Miliband supports. There is a growing whispering campaign amongst the “black cats” that David has cursed the club with his personal losing touch. Turns out he does have something in common with Brown after all…

So Gordon’s spokesgirl Kirsty McNeill denies that he is going anywhere. It seems the Labour MPs in the tea-room may have been getting a little ahead of themselves. Those so quick to accept her line completely might like to ask her why she is touting her CV around London head hunters though…

In nearly a year of being paid over £5,000 a month to represent the people of Kirkcaldy, Brown’s attendance record proves what everyone already knows – that his heart is not in it. He doesn’t turn up at debates, has asked just a handful of written questions and has done nothing to earn his taxpayer-funded salary. If he’s not really planning on shortly moving on, why not?

UPDATE: A co-conspirator writes:

Worth pointing out that likely successor John Park MSP suddenly stood down from his FPTP seat in the Edinburgh elections. Easing the way for a move to Westminster despite being Labour’s election coordinator.

Guido is getting wind of a rumour from Labour circles that Gordon is set to resign as an MP later on this week. It would make sense to allow the by-election to take place on the May 5th, and if the writ is to be moved in time it needs to happen ASAP. The Lords is apparently beckoning, and finally the people of Kirkcaldy will get the representation they deserve. Since standing down, the former Prime Mentalist has has an abominable attendance record and spent his time writing and lecturing while still taking the shilling.

A rumour, but we can but hope…

The word has gone out from Labour to moan about the number of Budget leaks that have happened. It’s easier than offering up real arguments. MPs and the dutiful Twitterati have fallen in line and are evoking the spirit of Hugh Dalton, the Chancellor who resigned in 1947 after briefing the Lobby before his Budget speech. But when did that precedent go out the window?

The BBC noted back in 2008:

“During former Chancellor Gordon Brown’s time at Number 11, he installed a system of briefing for the press around his pre-Budget Statement.”

In 2005 the entire Budget made it into the first edition of the Standard before Gordon had even started his speech. Amazing how quickly a party can develop a new set of principles once it is in opposition…

UPDATE: Leaks to Labour are of course in the public interest:

Am told that the Labour Whips now trying to lean on Gordon Brown not to make his rumoured Chamber Budget Day speech.—
Greg Hands (@GregHands) March 14, 2011

You can imagine the fingers of blame pointing already…

As we reported back at the time, when Jonah Brown last went to Japan he attended an 8-course dinner with the theme “Blessings of the Earth and Sea”. It goes without saying that on the same visit he agreed a nuclear fuel re-processing deal for Sellafield (which he also cursed). Let all the corners of the earth know and be warned that the one-eyed, accursed son of the manse brings disaster of biblical proportions to everything and everywhere he touches…

Alison McGovern hasn’t had a glittering career outside of politics. According to her website she was head girl at school in 1998, don’t you know, then on to UCL. She worked briefly as a researcher at the House of Commons before going to spin for Network Rail. She was elected in May, and as Guido reported at the time, immediately promoted to the dubious role of Gordon Brown’s PPS. Though no longer a frontbencher, or even a participating Member of Parliament, Gordon found it necessary to recruit such a minion.

You would think that after Brown’s abject failure to turn up to Parliament to represent the people of Kirkcaldy, Alison would have quietly dropped the laughable non-job description, but no, she is still using it today to promote her role as a Labour Yes2AV spokesman. So how has Gordon been keeping his PPS busy?

The  job normally entails:

• Being with the Minister at all times in the Chamber and for meetings on the Parliamentary estate. Gordon has given one backbench speech in an adjournment debate since May 2010 and asked a handful of written questions.
• Liaising between Commons and your bosses Government department. Gordon doesn’t have a department.
• Controlling access to the boss for other MPs who want to see him. Would anybody be seen dead seeking Brown’s advice?

Many would argue there is little point to Gordon Brown in his current role, let alone his PPS.

As Cameron touches down in Egypt, it seems the root of all the Middle-East trouble and other problems to blight world leaders has emerged:

Pictured left-to-right: Egypt’s Mubarak (gone), Jordan’s Abdullah (forced to preempt trouble by sacking his entire government), Scotland’s Jonah (gone) and Italy’s Berlusconi (awaiting trial). Going well for all of them…

And after forty years of uncontested rule, it was never going to end well for Gadaffi after this:

The curse is never far away…

Old blog favourite Sir Ronnie Cohen’s political journey is almost complete. Having gone from keeping Gordon Brown in his pocket and throwing wads of cash at that disaster, he has warmed to Cameron and is coming on board with the Big Society bank. Having donated some £1.8 million to Labour, Guido highlighted that Ronnie was caught spinning for Dave on a BBC Four program about the big society a couple of weeks ago:

It’s going to be tough for Baldwin to find a line to bash this particular dodgy non-dom city donor.