Monday, April 21, 2008

If Gordon Loses the Vote, Gordon Has To Go

As Cameron signals that he will probably line up his troops behind Frank Field’s amendment could we be looking at a no confidence vote? Effectively yes. Gordon introduced the 10p rate, Gordon abolished the 10p rate, Gordon complicated the tax and benefits system with his endless tinkering at social engineering. This mess is 100% Brown stuff.

The paper pundits are intoning gravely. Jackie Ashley says Gordon could be gone this week, Kavanagh says kick Ken out next week and get rid of the unelected PM. If only…

Despite Alistair’s grandstanding calls on the banks to buck the markets and drop their lending rates, even Northern Rock, controlled by the Treasury has upped lending rates. Meantime the socialist dreams of Gordon Brown the student are being realised with the back door nationalisation of the banks. Another £50 billion is to be pick-pocketed from the taxpayers to prop up banks. Guido does not know what the exact terms of the bail-out are, but in principle is opposed. Why are taxpayers expected to take risks which properly should be borne by shareholders?

Why should the banks listen to Gordon when his own government ministers don’t listen? Many junior members of the government are expected to rebel on the 10p rate, 42 days and even ID cards. We have a shambles of a government by the shambolic, with support slipping away. Bring on the General Election…

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Labour PPC : "Gordon is Giving Me Nightmares"

John Wiseman, Labour PPC for Westmorland and Lonsdale has, writing on LabourHome, candidly admitted that he seems “to be in the middle of a nightmare at present… Everyone seems depressed where I am standing for parliament. Gordon has decided to take money away from his core vote, PPS’s are threatening to resign!! When are we going to wake up!!! There is hundreds of councillors who are going to lose their seats if Gordon doesn’t listen. I am asking please Gordon for the last time wake up and smell the coffee…”
He blames it squarely on the abolition of the 10p tax rate…

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Jonah Brown Goes to America, Dollar Crashes to All Time Low

The Jonah effect is becoming scary, Gordon lands in America in the morning and the dollar crashes to an all time historic low by lunchtime. There really is something in this – within weeks of him becoming PM the country was hit by terror fire, pestilence and floods. He is a curse on everything he touches.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Summer Fashion Must Haves

Available now from Guido’s online merchandise store.
Well worth a tenner or so…

Download and listen to Jilted John’s Gordon is a Moron.MP3

Bet Wenger is Sorry Now

Guido has confirmed this with Ladbrokes: back in February Arsenal were the odds-on favourites to win Football’s Premier League title. In March Gordon held a summit with President Sarkozy at Arsenal’s Emirates stadium.

Many of Guido’s co-conspirators predicted that what has now come to pass would result. The curse of Jonah Brown hit Wenger’s boys in red as surely as if the PM himself had attended each and every match since.

The once-mighty Arsenal were beaten by Manchester United yesterday and are now out of the running for the Premier League title. They were doomed from the moment they agreed to let Gordon on to the pitch…

Friday, April 11, 2008

Schrödinger’s Brown

Only quantum politics explains how Gordon Brown…

  • stands for being different from Blair and being the same
  • is going to leave and stay in Iraq
  • cuts the NHS and expands it
  • emits and cuts back CO2 emissions; is anti-green and pro-green
  • is regressive and progressive; right wing and left wing
  • will be at the Olympic games and not at them
  • was against and in favour of obtaining a mandate to govern the British people
  • wanted a referendum and opposes a referendum
  • was both at the Lisbon treaty ceremony and not at it
  • stands for more and less borrowing
  • has ended and started the boom and bust cycle.

Hat-tip : Deconvoluter

Monday, April 7, 2008

Come Back Thatcher!

This poll result is phenomenal:

YouGov asked voters who they would choose from a list of politicians “at the peak of their powers” to be prime minister. Maggie Thatcher was the most popular with 27% wanting her back.

Brown was unpopular even among Labour voters: 43% of whom wanted Blair back, even Tony Benn was wanted by 17% of the party’s voters, Brown was the first choice of only 10% of Labour voters.

Remember what Hutton and Miliband said about Gordon? They were so right…
UPDATE : Guido forgot to quote the most important statistic, a mere 5% of all voters would rather have Gordon Brown as PM from the list of former PMs given.

Sunday, April 6, 2008

From Mr Brown to Mr Bean to Mr Blobby

Jonathan Oliver in the Sunday Times has a story about Gordon wandering around at the Progressive Governance jamboree with a big orange splodge of make-up on his forehead. Guido remarked on Gordon’s tendency to twattishness earlier this week, listing ten of the twatty things he has done. From tucking hs trousers into his socks to picking his nose for two minutes live on TV. The PM got lost at Windsor Castle and kept the Queen waiting last week, he comically once locked himself in the loo and had to be rescued by Tony Blair.

Downing Street’s spin-master Stephen Carter realises that, much to Guido’s satisfaction, the “PM is a twat” meme is gaining popular traction. Vince Cable vocalised what even Labour MPs think – the PM is a Mr Bean style nerd. It is one thing to be feared as a malevolent weirdo, another thing to be derided. So we now have the appointment of an ex-BBC producer, Nicola Burdett, 35, “to stop the embarrassing photographs and television footage that risk turning Brown into a figure of fun”.

An impossible task. Too late. People are already laughing down the pub at Gordon picking his nose on a mobile phone viral video.

UPDATE : Makes you proud don’t it? 19 heads of state met Britain’s Prime Minister looking like this…

Friday, March 21, 2008

Muir Says "Bye for Now" to WPP

Guido’s co-conspirator in the red glasses emails a report from his Blackberry after the party;

at David Muir’s leaving drinks at WPP there was a hefty amount of sceptism from the audience about his tenure in Downing Street. There was a heckle from the back of the (small) crowd that there was no point giving a leaving gift “as he will be back in a year”.

Branding bullshit guru Muir said he was off to “do some good” – helping to keep Gordon in No. 10. Just what we need, another delusional Scot in Downing Street.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Will There Be Tears at the Leaving Party?

Spencer Livermore has been at Gordon’s side for over a decade. He is now off to Saatchi. His departure had been rumoured for some months – since Gordon’s ranting started reducing him to tears. The hard-drinking Damian McBride is said to be next…

Seen Elsewhere

India’s Modi Bypasses Mainstream Media | Index
Bercow on the Knife Edge | Quentin Letts
Welcome to Mississippi | Conservative Women
LibDems Select Hancock Replacement | Blue Guerilla
Carswell Resigning: “Moment Labour Won Election” | Labour Uncut
Why We Need Change | Douglas Carswell
The Howard Roark of Westminster | Guardian
Carswell, the Clacton Cassandra | James Ford
Love Bomb Carswell | ConservativeHome
Denis MacShane’s Ex is Now Hacked Off Spokesman | Speccie
How the Carswell Story Unfolded | Sky News


VOTER-RECALL
Get the book Find out more about PLMR


Douglas Carswell’s side-kick Dan Hannan MEP pours water on the obvious question:

“I won’t be joining UKIP, though I wish Douglas Carswell all the best. He has been a superb MP, and it’s honourable to stand for re-election.”



Owen Jones says:

We also need Zil lanes.


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