633,793 Page Hits from 476,745 Visitors

Google reports 92,332 absolute unique visitors came here last month. More people visited Guido than any other comparable political website.*

The top ten referrers after Google and Yahoo are:

#1 Iain Dale
#2 ConservativeHome
#3 Spectator / Coffee House blog
#4 PoliticsHome
#5 PoliticalBetting.com
#6 Times Blogs (Red Box and Comment Central)
#7 Boulton & Co.
#8 Dizzy Thinks
#9 Telegraph Blogs
#10 Biased-BBC

Guido would especially like to thank his advertisers this month for their support and contribution to his cellars.

Amazon – Guido’s readers buy hundreds of books every month.
Argos Online – They can deliver barbecues and kiddies pools.
Betfair – Place your bets.
Central Office of Information – It was like a tax rebate.
Children Are Unbeatable Alliance – They are in Guido’s house.
Compass – Discerning advertisers.
Connect Online Backup – Keeps Guido’s data safe.
eBay – For everything.
Friends of Zimbabwe – But not Mugabe.
Help the Aged – Getting heard in Westminster.
Laithwaites – Booze to the door.
Lastminute – Nice viral.
MoneySupermarket.com – Does what it says on the tin.
Leonard Cheshire Disability – Campaigning.
Savanna Cider – African cider.
Standpoint magazine – Definitely.
The Stationery Office – Download legislation.
Total Politics magazine – Welcome.
War on Want – Keeps Guido in Margaux.
WWF – Love those Pandas…

*Fewer people re-loaded PoliticalBetting.com more often.

Another Day, Another Downing Street Rat…

Andrew Porter reports that Martin Sheehan, Gordon’s Head of Strategic Communications, is making the dash for cash to PR firm Portland.

Martin Sheehan says: “The opportunity to join Portland at this stage in the company’s growth is one I couldn’t refuse. Working for two Prime Ministers has been a fantastic experience. After spending eight of the last ten years in Downing Street, it’s time for a new challenge.” Translation: a year of the Prime Mentalist is enough for me…

Gordon Emails Wendi in New York

Guido has got this before it appears in PR Week:

Last week Downing Street functionaries were asked by Gordon to switch off auto-complete on his email software. It turned out that our early morning emailing PM had accidentally emailed Wendi Deng, also known as Mrs Rupert Murdoch.

Easy mistake to make, but Mrs Murdoch doesn’t really have much interest in Scottish politics. No doubt she is a little better informed now…

Pundits Think SNP Could Take Glasgow East

The punditry can get a little carried away, less than a year ago they thought Gordon could walk on water, now they think he is a millstone around Labour’s neck. 65% of the “insider panel” on PoliticsHome reckons the SNP will win Glasgow East. Guido is amazed that they think the SNP can catch up from 43.7% behind. That would be phenomenal…

Guido is sceptical, but Brown is such a Jonah,* you never know…

*Oil is up some $10 since he went to beg the sheiks to cut their profits. In a result reminiscent of the New Deal for Youth that resulted in higher youth unemployment, the plan to build millions of new homes has resulted in the lowest number of houses being built since World War II. God really hates this accursed one-eyed, son of the manse, Prime Mentalist.

Gordon Droned Mandela Out

The rumour swirling around the hospitality enclosure at the Mandela concert on Friday night was that Brown charmlessly went straight in hard with talk of Zimbabwe and the Africa summit (according to a security source). Mandela turned to his wife and entourage saying he was tired and should leave almost as soon as Brown arrived to sit with him.
As the balcony was well lit for the TV cameras, concert goers could see from the floor that Brown was sat alone well before the end of the gig. Mandela was said to be exhausted, being 90 and having just delivered a speech in front of thousands. So he left Gordon.

Hence the cosy pictures of Mandela with his feet up with Dave, but none such with the Prime Mentalist…

Friday Competition Winners

A record 326 competition entries, if indeed some of them could be dignified with that description. Guido could not make his mind up on a single winner, as usual most entries were crap and obvious. Anyway the three that tickled Guido’s jaded and twisted sense of humour were:

SACKERSON said…

At that point I said, now tell me the truth about you and Carol.

idle said…

Cherie Birkin, QC:

“blahmutterblahmutter COCKTAIL PARTY AT THE INNS OF COURT blahblahmutter PUBLIC-SCHOOL TYPE blahblahblah LOOKED AT ME IN A MOST SUGGESTIVE FASHION muttermutterblah ANYWAY, blahblah I SAW MY CHANCE OF SOCIAL ADVANCEMENT blahmuttermutterblah SO I CRADLED HIS TESTICLES IN MY HAND JUST LIKE THIS mutterblahmuttermutter AND HE EXPLODED LIKE A CHINESE FIREWORK!

I’M AFRAID TO SAY I WAS VERY, VERY DRUNK……”

Oscar said…

Fuck me. It looks like she’s trying to whistle.

Email Guido with your address(es), and a copy of John Laughland’s A History of Political Trials: From Charles I to Saddam Hussein will be sent Royal Mail…

The winners are truly one(s) in a hundred…

Balls Gets Clap

The Thomas Cubitt bar off Eaton Square, Belgravia, is a favourite of hedge fund managers and girls who want to marry them (or failing that, Prince Harry). Guido can particularly recommend the 1988 Chateau Rauzan-Ségla Margaux at £120 a bottle and the 1999 Louis Roederer Cristal at £190 for your mistress.

Exactly the kind of establishment you would expect to find Ed Balls frequenting – after all unlike the rest of us he does not have to worry about higher mortgage payments – we pay his for him. Last week he was in the Cubitt and the hedgies resentfully ignored him encroaching onto their territory. Until it was that it was time for him to leave; when he stood up the room gave him a slow hand-clap. Ed’s blink rate increased as he attempted to make a dignified exit.

He is rumoured to be a possible replacement for Alistair Darling at the Treasury. Clearly not something that will please the City’s moneymen….

Rich & Mark’s Monday Morning View

Sunday Sleaze Round-Up

Guido has introduced a simple Pigs in Shit rating system for guidance on the misdemeanors of porcine politicians (guide here). Post links in the comments.

MPs Cashing in on Zimbabwe’s Misery

Totally disingenuous headline in the Indy

[…]

+ READ MORE +

The Letter That Sealed Wendy’s Fate

click to enlarge
Back in November Guido had the exclusive scoop and was the first to publish this letter,* saying it would mean Wendy Alexander was toast. This personal note to Paul Green (dated October 5) showed that her

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Gordon Brown’s Unhappy Anniversary

Via Eyebrow Magazine

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Friday Caption Contest

Prize of John Laughland’s A History of Political Trials: From Charles I to Saddam Hussein to the wittiest comment – which is not going to be the most obvious comment.

[…]

+ READ MORE +



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Ed Conway asks Yanis Varoufakis if he has been sacrificed:

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