Tim Ireland has got the stuff. Brilliant concept, brilliantly executed, who is going to tell him about the, err, vocals. Guido won’t, he has dark powers, he can make Google do weird things to you…

Guido had a crush on Mrs Black a decade or so ago, we were both single, nothing ever came of it…. She has a certain something – Guido likes to think it is terrible taste in men…

WARNING: Do not kick on the way up, you may meet them on the way down.

Basher Davis has been outflanked from the right on Europe by Cameron. How could this happen? Davis backing Europhobes justify this with the phrase “DD has a plan”. On they waffle about his carefully constructed plan to exit the EPP after negotiating with the MEPs, so he would do it better than Cameron. No difference in principle, just a difference in practise. Davis, based on his immense experience (of never being in the cabinet), would do it with the agreement of wet Tory MEPs. So what they won’t do today, they would do tomorrow, if Davis asks them nicely. See the glitch?

How has Davis got himself in this wet position? He promises 8p off income tax at the drop of a hat, yet is unable to commit to change the administrative label tags on Quisling Tory MEPs without lengthy negotiations with the lost souls who have gone tragically and federastically Euro-native.

Step forward dripping Damian Green, erstwhile campaigner for Basher. The man who held Basher’s Euro-policy to ransom. In reality if Basher had committed to quit the EPP, Damian Green would scream, get me out of here!

The Torygraph is having some editorial difficulties. Guido awaits the inevitable call to consider the editor’s position. It mirrors the Tory party’s generational split, the aged Barclay brothers are sympathetic to fellow grandfather, David Davis. The younger staff writers are sympathetic to the young father (with another on the way), Cameron.

Stephen Glover in the Indy mentions the troubles the Torygraph has being so in-the-bed with the Conservative Party. Tory leader Michael Howard’s ex-spin doctor, Guy Black, handles corporate affairs for the Telegraph Group, but has taken to interfering in editorial affairs, according to Glover

Mr Black recently issued an instruction to editorial that Daily Telegraph columnists were not to make too much of the attack by Rebekah Wade on her husband. (Mr Black is a close friend of both parties.)

Which is odd, since they are both Labour supporters…

Sir Robert Atkins MEP, the Belgian native and Tory deputy – leader in the Euro-Parliament, has been heard muttering by a Guido operative that Cameron’s decision to leave the EPP will most likely result in a rebellion against the plan. They plan to tell Cameron there are other, more important fights for him to fight. Belgian Bob reckons its “wrong to appease Bill Cash”, he prefers instead to appease Jacques Chirac.

The Notting Hill crowd reckon this is a battle worth fighting – the Tory MEPs could form the future base of a pan-European Altanticist “New Europe”, free trade and free markets faction. But leaving the large EPP faction would involve the immediate loss of some privileges, perhaps fewer MEP family members on the payroll, maybe Belgian Bob would no longer be in charge of the European Committee on Stationery Control Technology.

Guido reckons the loss of Tory influence in the EPP would be welcome. The Tories always seem to be influenced in one direction – towards the inertia and corrupt ways of their fellow Euro-politicians. The European parliament seems like a vast international student union debating society funded by Europe’s taxpayers. Who knows, the Tories might even gain influence, with the horse-trading and compromises going in their direction for a change.

Guido is pleased to remind readers that Labour’s biggest donor of 2004, and coincidentally subsequently enobled, Lord Drayson is the subject of a television special tonight. The Irresistible Rise of Tony’s Crony: A Money Programme Special. BBC TWO at 10pm on Monday 21 November.

Labour sleaze : its John Major time all over again. Previous posts.

Apparently Cameron has promised Bill Cash and Daniel Hannan that Tory MEPs will be out of the EPP by the end of Cameron’s first week as leader. If wet Europhile Tory MEPs want to make an issue of it – all the better – a fight with them will be a pleasure. A move that will undermine UKIP to the point of extinction and pacify a right-wing base that is a little nervous about where Cameron is going to take them. The talk is that David Davis will be offered defence.

UPDATE : from a blog reading source “overheard a senior Tory MEP discussing Cameron’s decision to leave the EPP. He said that they will most likely rebel against the plan and tell Cameron there are other, more important fights for him to fight. It was said that it is wrong to appease the Eurosceptic likes of Bill Cash.”

Guido was at a wonk-fest dinner Saturday night (the after dinner speaker was an amusing Stephen Pollard), talk around the table was how wonks from big-government Demos to the tax-cutting Reform were going to re-align themselves towards Cameron. On the right, pictures of Davis were being deleted from their websites, former Davis campaign volunteers had found pressing commitments back at the office, ideological pontoon bridges were being rapidly erected towards Cameron.

So many MPs have publicly dumped their support for Davis its embarrassing, although entirely in keeping with Tory tradition. One case intrigues Guido: who was the Davis campaign team MP who told Denis MacShane in Brussels when asked why he wasn’t back in Westminster campaigning for Basher, that “there was no point in flogging a dead horse”? (A tale recounted gleefully to Andrew Marr).

David Canzini was drafted in late to convince the Tory core to vote for Basher – his spin skills are frankly debatable – he is not thought to be the person to win everyone over. The debate over Sunday lunch around his mother’s table must be very interesting, Helen Canzini is listed as a Cameron supporter on www.CameronCampaign.Org.