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Yes, yes, yes, yes and definitely yes.

Fancy a Bet Fraser?

In this week’s Speccie Fraser Nelson has a breathless piece on the Tory fundraising bonanza which includes, as an aside, the news that
“the once-formidable Blair-Levy double-act has been closed by the Metropolitan Police’s investigation, soon to be handed to the Crown Prosecution Service. It will not, I understand, end in charges for Tony Blair or any of his senior lieutenants.”

Fancy a bet Fraser? Loser buys lunch and a decent bottle of wine. Suspect the toast will be to the boys in blue…


Incidentally, the Observer’s Mark Townsend, still hasn’t paid up, but promises “soon”. It has been three months…

UPDATE : Fraser Nelson has been in touch and the bet is on. He warns “I have an expensive taste in wine!” Excellent, so he won’t mind Guido’s choice…

Cover Up : The Sith’s Use of No. 11 Questioned Again

Iain Dale alerted Guido to this PQ a few days ago:
Mr Keith Simpson (Con, Mid Norfolk): To ask the Chancellor of the Exchequer which charities have held meetings at 11 Downing Street since December 2005.

Mr Keith Simpson (Con, Mid Norfolk): On how many occasions since December 2005 the Smith Institute has held meetings at 11 Downing Street and who attended each.

John Healey (Financial Secretary to the Treasury): I will let the Honourable Member have a reply in due course.

Perhaps Guido, as always, can be helpful here. Previously when a similar question to this was last asked, the Sith and No. 11 went into a minor panic. Konrad Caulkett, events coordinator for the Sith, compiled a comprehensive list of all meetings and events held at No. 11. When the Sith realised that confirmation of over a hundred events being held by a “non-political” charity on Gordon’s premises at the taxpayers expense would look bad, they decided on an outrageous cover-up. The official response made was that the information was not available – despite the Sith having already compiled the now readily available answer. Guido presumes that the civil servants were kept in the dark, no civil servant would lie, would they? So if any of Gordon’s civil servants really want the to obtain the answer this time, Konrad is only a call away. He won’t talk to Guido, maybe he will talk to you…

Incidentally as any political lobbyist or campaigner will tell you, hiring a prestigous address in Westminster for a seminar, providing coffee and croissants for the attendees is no cheap affair. It can easily work out at £50 per head per day. Smith Institute events at No. 11, like the one Guido infiltrated, can have in the region of a hundred attendees. How much do the Sith pay for holding events at No. 11?

I feel a few Freedom of Information requests coming on…

Hell, Here He Comes

A Story That Got filed Under Crazy

A co-conspirator has re-sent an email Guido ignored in September. With Guido’s seasoned nose for a story it was, errm, disbelieved. Doh!
The Blair Foundation is going to be TB’s main post-No. 10 vehicle for self-publicity 21st century. Think Clinton Foundation/Clinton Global Initiative. First main focus is planned to be the Middle East – mainly Israel/Palestine, but watch this space for quick focus switch to Syria, even Iran. Funding is targeted to be coming from big donors/businesses in the US. And the connection to Cash4Honours?

Well, when TB needs lots of money for a big project, who does he turn to? Of course, Lord Cashpoint. Levy was asked to be chief fundraiser some months ago. The plan was for him to go fundraising in the US, later this year, say about the same time that Blair finally decides to pick up his congressional medal, with the accompanying press coverage, goodwill etc etc.

Last I heard plans have not changed. Lets just hope Levy gets out of the country before they make him do the perp walk.

Quite spookily Finkelstein was damn close in this article.

Jerusalem’s medical community is experienced with dealing mental cases who arrive from all over the world proclaiming themselves to be the Second Coming or the New Messiah. Blair may prove to a difficult case, if he actually believes he can be some kind of latter day Jimmy Carter bringing peace to the Middle East he is going to present quite a challenge for Jerusalem’s psychiatrists. “Y’know, I brought peace and freedom to Iraq, I want to do the same for Israel…”

Official : Guido More Helpful to LibDems than Ming

As the mutterings about Mings leadership continue, this news will only add to his woes. Guido gets the LibDem message to more people than Ming, hell even Iain Dale does. In fact Ming barely pips Recess Monkey in getting his message out.

According to Cowley Street’s web guru*, Mark Pack, the LibDem party website gets more referrals from Guido and Iain Dale’s blogs than it does from Ming’s own campaign website.

Rob Fenwick, the former LibDem e-campaigner during the 2005 General Election, is very sniffy, telling Stephen Tall that “the power of ‘celebrity’ bloggers is massively over-hyped. Guido Fawkes is a Westminster Village distraction, the love of politicians and journalists.” Terrible, ain’t it?

*Top referrers in order: 1. Guido Fawkes, 2. Iain Dale, 3. Lynne Featherstone, 4. Ming Campbell, 5. Recess Monkey. Source: LibDemVoice.

Birds of a Feather

The Smith Institute, that non-political charitable think-tank which has nothing to do with Gordon Brown, is holding a seminar later this month on “economic opportunity”. Despite being currently under investigation (for the second time) by the Charity Commissioners over all-too-close links to Gordon Brown and allegations of blatant political activity, the event is being held at No. 11 Downing Street.

Guido has in the past suggested that the Sith is basically a platform for the greater glorification of Gordon, which allows him to rub shoulders with plutocrats and corporate CEO titans whilst simultaneously providing photo opportunities leading to donations.

True to form, the keynote speaker will be a CEO of a U.S. multi-national, Lewis Booth, the Chairman of Ford Europe. He will tell the iron chancellor how to “shape global policy for economic opportunity”.

Globally Ford lost $8.5 billion last year and has announced that it aims to close 12 plants and cut 40,000 jobs. Like the UK public sector it has massive “legacy costs” of pensions and lifetime healthcare, expensive deals with unions and ever-increasing debts.

Its share price has dived from $18 to a low of $6 just as Labour has recently polled the lowest since 1992. So he is obviously the best person to guide Gordon, they have so much in common…

Ask Dave : Repeat

By a large margin the question WebCameron users most want answered by Dave this week is: who is paying for WebCameron? Before Christmas Dave gave a load of flannel about being all for transparency. He then avoided answering the question as to who is behind his mysterious millions. So this week the question has been posed again, who is ultimately and opaquely behind these mysterious offshore lenders? Arms dealers?

An honest democracy can’t have political parties funded by shadowy hidden manipulators. Voters are entitled to know who is financing the party they are considering voting for, they can then judge for themselves their motives and their influence on the party. That is not too much to ask of Dave, is it?

Mili-Xmas Child Abuse

Over at the Mili-Blog we learn that for Christmas he got “a pencil case for my godson made out of an old tyre – better than it sounds”. Hmmm.

Imagine the scene on Christmas day:

David Miliband “Here you go.”
Godson “Thanks Uncle David!”
DM “You’ll really like it, it is environmentally sound as well.”

[sound of enthusiastic tearing of recycled paper]

GS “A sodding pencil case made out of an old tyre? You tight, four-eyed twat.”

Bet the kid really did think that. Poor lad, probably bullied in the playground, mocked for bringing his pencils inside a bit of old tyre. What kind of godfather is Miliband?

Obviously no Nintendo Wii’s were bought for the tragically deprived kids of wonk families. Guido, coincidentally, got his godson a traditional handcrafted toy made from all natural materials – wood and rubber. The lad lives in Hampstead and so will probably be able to shoot carbon rocks at Miliband’s godson with his new catapault. Perfect.

New Year Resolutions

To focus more attention on the next generation of politicians; Miliband, Balls, Benn, Osborne, Cameron, Clegg, Laws, Davey and the other ones who’s names Guido can’t remember.

In an effort to halt the development of a second chin Guido has resolved not to drink before midday or after midnight and not at all Monday to Thursday*. Which means from noon till midnight, Friday to Sunday could be messy.

To say nothing more about Ros Taylor. Zippo.

*Apart from medicinal purposes and on the day charges are made for Loans for Lordships.

Snouts in the Trough : MPs’ Expense Fiddles

Sir Philip Mawer, the Parliamentary Commissioner for Standards, reckons that “the sharp differences in expenses claims among MPs were not easily explicable.” Guido can explain it easily. Loads of MPs are on the fiddle.

“The degree of variation in the spend on stationery and allowances, and in some aspects of the travel regime, are not easily explicable,” he says tactfully. “It is so marked that it is bound to give rise to questions about Members’ practice.” Ahh, he does realise they are fiddling.

He intends to press for MPs to pay for at least one of their own homes out of their own pockets. So that will bugger up Geoff Hoon forinstance, who claims at the taxpayer’s expense for his constituency home, despite owning it outright with no mortage. Senior Labour figures like David Blunkett, Jack Straw, John Prescott, Ruth Kelly and Margaret Beckett have fiddled between them hundreds of thousands of pounds in unjustified expenses. Dole cheats go to jail for far smaller frauds.

Backstage at Labour Conference During Blair’s Speech

Drop the Dictator : Saddam Swings

Dave : Brown is the Dark Side

The Smith Institute exposés last month evoked from the co-conspirators an analogy with the evil Sith cult in Star Wars. It’s catching, Dave’s New Year statement too uses the imagery of the force;
“2007 will be the year that Labour’s dark side comes to the fore. With Blair going and Brown coming, we need to prepare ourselves for an onslaught of negative campaigning and the politics of fear and division.

The real battle for Britain’s future begins: Labour’s state control versus Conservative social responsibility.”

Guido’s Predictions for 2007

With a better track record than some pundits, Guido looks into his crystal ball;

  1. Lembit Opik will be involved in a front-page scandal.
  2. Following a surge to the SNP in local elections the Conservatives will finally move away from Unionism and towards spinning off Scottish and Welsh sister parties as part of their localism agenda.
  3. Multiple charges will be brought against Downing Street characters in the Loans for Lordships scandal. Evidence of profiteering by Labour donors with government contracts awarded in dubious circumstances will surface. The fall-out will be politically devastating for Labour.
  4. Informal Tory approaches will be made to leading LibDem figures as to discussions on the shape of the future governing coalition.
  5. New Media outlets will start to go mass market, disrupting the established politico-media nexus and terrifying old media owners.

Guido fully expects to be right on the majority of his predictions…

Cheeky Christmas

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