And lo, the Lord thy God spoke unto Miliband the Younger, and said: thou must control immigration.

Today’s Observer is not a spoof. It seems Ed has been hanging out with Russell Brand a little too long. Labour really have “commissioned a giant stone inscription bearing Labour’s six election pledges that is set to be installed in the Downing Street Rose Garden if he becomes prime minister.”

Apparently:

“The 8ft 6in-high limestone structure is intended to underline his commitment to keep his promises by having them literally “carved in stone” and visible from the offices inside No 10.”

They might as well write it on the barn wall…