August 20th, 2014

Sorry Sam: Dave Cancels Cornwall


134 Comments

  1. 1
    Lord Dickard says:

    So he should, the waster.

    Like

    • 6
      Toxic Labour for Parasites, bring back the workhouses. says:

      Nothing will be done about the appalling cruelty in Iraq so what’s the point?

      Like

      • 14
        Dhimmi Dave Bumsex says:

        I do hope he is going to go and explain (face to face) to ISIS about the advantages of bumsex. Let’s see how long he lasts.

        Like

        • 25
          My vote went to the Tory Party and all it got me was this stupid moniker. says:

          They (followers of the religion of peace & tolerance) have been known to continuously torture people for two years, which is the limit of what the body can endure before it dies. It would be interesting to see if Cameron can go longer.

          Like

          • The religion of peace says:

            Brother Cameron has surrenderd to the Brotherhood, he agreed, they are not a terr01st organisation, Allahhhhhhhh Akkkbaaaaaarrrrr

            https://www.middleeastmonitor.com/news/europe/13554-uk-probe-finds-muslim-brotherhood-not-terrorist

            We laugh at Brother Cameron, we call him a ‘useful Consersavtive kuffar’ who does good work promoting the UK Caliphate.

            Brother Cameron recently launched the first UK sharia compliant bond financing. Again allowing Sharia law to dicate financing of UK government debt.

            The Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne said:

            “Today’s issuance of Britain’s first sovereign Sukuk delivers on the government’s commitment to become the western hub of Islamic finance and is part of our long term economic plan to make Britain the undisputed centre of the global financial system.

            “We have seen very strong demand for the Sukuk, resulting in a price that delivers good value for money for the taxpayer. I hope that the success of this government issuance will encourage further private sector issuances of Sukuk in the UK.”

            https://www.gov.uk/government/news/government-issues-first-islamic-bond

            Shukran brother Cameron

            Vote ISIS
            Vote Often
            Vote Lib Lab Con

            Returning to a UK town near you, very soon.

            Inshallaaaaaaaaaaaaa

            Like

          • The religion of peace says:

            Brother Cameron has surrenderd to the Brotherhood, he agreed, they are not a terr01st organisation, Allahhhhhhhh Akkkbaaaaaarrrrr

            https://www.middleeastmonitor.com/news/europe/13554-uk-probe-finds-muslim-brotherhood-not-terrorist

            We laugh at Brother Cameron, we call him a ‘useful Consersavtive kuffar’ who does good work promoting the UK Caliphate.

            Shukran brother Cameron

            Vote ISIS
            Vote Often
            Vote Lib Lab Con

            Returning to a UK town near you, very soon.

            Inshallaaaaaaaaaaaaa

            Like

          • The religion of peace says:

            Brother Cameron, our ‘useful Consersavtive kuffar’ has done some more very good work promoting the UK Caliphate.

            He has recently launched the first UK sharia compliant bond financing which had £2.3bn of demand.

            Again allowing Sharia law to dicate financing of UK government debt.

            The Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne said:

            “Today’s issuance of Britain’s first sovereign Sukuk delivers on the government’s commitment to become the western hub of Islamic finance and is part of our long term economic plan to make Britain the undisputed centre of the global financial system.

            “We have seen very strong demand for the Sukuk, resulting in a price that delivers good value for money for the taxpayer. I hope that the success of this government issuance will encourage further private sector issuances of Sukuk in the UK.”

            https://www.gov.uk/government/news/government-issues-first-islamic-bond

            Shukran brother Cameron

            Vote ISIS
            Vote Often
            Vote Lib Lab Con

            Returning to a UK town near you, very soon.

            Inshallaaaaaaaaaaaaa

            Like

      • 53
        Noah the man with the ark says:

        Flood it

        Like

      • 95
        the league against cruel sports says:

        This years Birdfair was a huge success with over 22,000 people flocking to the event. Our CEO Joe Duckworth hosted a talk with our VP Bill Oddie to discuss the massacre of migratory birds in Malta and how those in attendance could play a part in our campaign.

        Quack! Quack!

        Like

    • 23
      The femine Touch says:

      Has it not occurred to him yet that a parliament full of women is taking the country to the dogs?

      Like

    • 35
      which one is the labour MP? says:

      Like

    • 119
      Anonymous says:

      Cameron really is a spoonfaced dickhead.

      Like

      • 123

        And he’s getting that veiny, blotchy cheeks that Heath had made all his own. Obviously, CMD has leased it from Heath’s Estate. Can a medical person say whether this is “Gentleman-farmer braves the winds of winter to walk to his local o’ert t’ hill” type of skin condition or is it evidence of dissolute behaviour and a rampant form of circulatory disease accompanying something really, really fatal – quickly.

        Like

    • 124

      DAVE SAYS

      DC: I m always an arn s length away from my Blackberry so no problem wherever I am in the Universe — I can always tune in to a Cobra videoconference in Downing Street or with Barack in Washington — even from Mars.

      Aide: Perhaos PM it may be imprudent to publicise that you still have a Bkackberry . It s yesterday s technology the company is near bankrupt and it has no facility for video conferencing . Try a Samsung .

      DC: Sorry , Samsung ?— is that a new type of sushi ?

      Like

    • 125

      Does Dave s pose above possibly conjure up an albeit fleeting resemblance to New Romantics Icon and general ladies dreamboat Bryan Ferry in his Roxy Music heyday as the ultimate thinking and non -thinking woman s idea of her personal Paradise Night?

      Er …. NO!!

      Like

  2. 2
    West Country Tory says:

    We didn’t want him down here anyway. Get back to London and do your job you lazy oaf.

    Like

    • 26

      The pasty producers were depending upon it!

      Like

      • 126

        POLPERRO PILLOW POSTURING:

        Morning –5 a.m.

        Sam C:You awake yet darling .

        DC: Why what s hapoened ?

        SC: Just seen this on You Tube . l

        DC:What?

        SC ;too gruesome darling , can t explain . Best to see for yourself. .

        DC : Good God ! The raghead s got a British accent , Obama will roast me for this !

        SC : What shall we do ?

        DC: Don t know about you . I m heading back to The Smoke NOW. Those maniacs will probably come after me when they repatriate ! I don t want to rely on this yokel security down here — get myself hunkered in Downing Street . Use Churchill s old Cabinet cellars if I have to . Call a few Of the chaps down from Hereford for company . I didn t get where I am today without an unfailing sense of self preservation……. and tell
        George he s running the country till further notice.

        Like

  3. 3
    One Pound Fish says:

    FFS

    Like

  4. 4
    My vote went to the Tory Party and all it got me was this stupid moniker. says:

    Lucky Cornwall.

    Like

    • 38
      Cornwall Tourist Board says:

      Yes the “Radonscare” worked like a charm.
      Come down to Cornwall everybody, surfs up, PM not coming! Yay!

      Like

  5. 5
    Vince Cable says:

    I can’t recall Parliament.

    Like

  6. 7

    This will ‘help’ ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

    Like

  7. 8
    Nero says:

    Who the fuck still uses a BlackBerry? Other than the mong in the photo.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. 9
  9. 10
    C Bass says:

    We’ll miss him, even though he points a lot

    Like

    • 128

      Did we all know that under British legislation the act of pointing one s finger can be construed as assault leading to criminal arrest ?

      But not the act of riding bycycles on the pavement apparently — eh Lord Mayor !!

      Like

  10. 11
    Dhimmi Dave Bumsex says:

    There’s a Halibut up there, that I’m pointing to.

    Like

  11. 13
    Rick Stein says:

    Bugger!

    Like

  12. 18
    Genghiz the kahn says:

    I would like to thank Mr Al Kaida who prepared that background paper that there was no strategic threat to the UK in The Middle East.

    Like

  13. 19
    John Bercow says:

    LOL, he can try. I’ve had his pass revoked.

    Like

  14. 20
    Vote Dave? Get stuffed says:

    Never mind, Dave. This time next year you won’t have this problem.

    Like

  15. 21
    Fred says:

    Liked by 1 person

  16. 22
    House of Ill rëpute says:

    Like

  17. 27
    nermal says:

    I think that we should follow the lead of Milliband and the labour party when it comes to the problems in Syria and Iraq. Just remind me what have they said.

    Like

  18. 28
    SS says:

    And he still says, I will eat Halal food, tosser.

    Like

  19. 29
    Jimmy Cricket says:

    And there’s more.

    Like

  20. 30
    Anonymous says:

    “Dave Cancels Cornwall”
    Wot! No fracking potential in the place?
    The McCarthy era gave us: Are you now, or have you ever been, a member of the Communist Party?
    While the Cameron era offers: Have you ever sought, or been successful in seeking, to have directions to data removed from Google?
    Standing pre-election orders: Don’t mention not mentioning any mention of the redacted fracking report.

    Like

  21. 31
    A "Brtish" MP ? says:

    Like

  22. 43
    Everyman says:

    A spell in M and S clothing departments these days is a chance to visit South Asia and hear many languages, none of which are English, admire the sound of Urdu, the garments and colour, apart from the burquas.

    Like

  23. 48
    Casual Observer II says:

    Cornish fishermen in trouble? Rennard’s fingers still smell fishy.

    Like

  24. 49
    Peter Martin says:

    If a PM is going to cancel hols every time a ‘British’ (H/T – BBC) ‘man’ may be involved in something more than dodgy overseas or home, they may as well now write the allowance out the job spec.

    Isn’t there someone Dave or Theresa can ban from coming here to warn about such things lest the locals kick off. Yes again?

    Every little gesture helps.

    Like

  25. 50
    Maimed Codger says:

    One would ask… are they revolting, in Cornwall ?

    Like

  26. 57

    So Rapboy is back to massage the Cobra ?

    Snake oil a go-go :-)

    Vote UKIP :-D

    Like

  27. 60
    SamCam says:

    Thank fuck for that. Got rid of the bumsexing pretend husband for a few days.

    Pass the plonk, let’s celebrate.

    Like

  28. 62
    George"Some of my best friends are J*wish" Galloway says:

    Bradford braces for fresh ground invasion of Israelis.

    Like

  29. 65
    Curious Clegg says:

    Can you tell me Rennard — I’ve always wondered — do the muzzie women wear knickers under their burqas?

    Like

  30. 66
    Maltese Junket King says:

    Has Farage cancelled his holiday or is he still on some Maltese junket?

    Like

  31. 68
    (Ras)Putin says:

    There’s no need to visit Russia. We will visit you.

    One people! One Russia! One Leader!

    Like

  32. 69
    Anonymous says:

    Like

  33. 70
    Lard Rennard says:

    Hi ladies! I’m back!

    Like

  34. 72
    This is what Rolf Harris's cellmate said to him says:

    Like

  35. 78
    Prime Minister David Cameron says:

    The urgent priority must be an immediate end to the renewed outbreak of bumsex”

    Like

  36. 79
    cheche says:

    The British Media doesnt know what to do about this murder in Iraq. Its evident to everyone except them whats going on in this country.

    Like

  37. 80
    Frank Carson says:

    My mate Jim told me he recently made a new friend. He says his new pal is a freethinking Muslim who loves everyone regardless of religion, wishes peace for all the peoples of the world, hates violence of any kind, believes women are equal to men and opposes female genital mutilation and child marriage.

    Poor Jim. He’s never outgrown having imaginary friends.

    Like

    • 86
      David Cameron says:

      What are his views on anal sex between consenting males?

      I do have a vacancy in need of a box ticking exercise.

      Like

  38. 81

    Vote UKIP :-D

    Like

  39. 82
    Iain Duncan Smith says:

    We have a very impressive arms industry in the UK and now we’re leading the world in the exporting of jihadists.

    Just rejoice at that news.

    Like

    • 94
      Top of the market (it's all down hill from here) says:

      Front running…

      Exports up in the worst recovery ever, good news all round!

      Like

    • 109
      inside out says:

      Just wait,when they have identified this murderer they find out,he is on Job Seekers Allowance,has wife and 3 kids all on benefits and his absent abroad is classed as holiday.He comes from Peckham or Luton,you know its true.Can’t wait for politicians answers.

      Like

  40. 84
    Banned says:

    Isn’t it odd that no “community representative” of the UK Muslim population has put himself in front of a TV camera to say how sorry he is for the death of an innocent journalist – and that not all UK Muslims are like this etc.. Their silence is almost tacit approval of the barbaric killings.

    Like

  41. 85
    P l e b says:

    Another holiday? He’s only just come back from Portugal.

    Idle bastard.

    Like

  42. 89
    JJ says:

    BBC reporting on the James Wright Foley beheading yet?

    Like

  43. 93

    Banks have been specifically excluded from sanctions of course and existing obligations are not affected. Very hostile words from Russia’s Fin Min:

    Vote UKIP :-D

    Like

  44. 97
    JJ says:

    Oh right, so people who trap their partners in a cycle of emotional or psychological cruelty and abuse would be prosecuted and jailed under tough new laws proposed by ministers.

    That’s women fucked then!

    Like

  45. 102
    dr natural says:

    one solution might be to put up a large reward to identify the evil fucker and then kill everybody he has ever known.

    Like

  46. 103
    Von Cameroon says:

    I am now heading on a bearing ENE to return to my desk and lead the Country in a manner befitting my postion.

    BTW: BBM keeps messaging ~ Wheres Clegg?

    Like

  47. 104
    geordieboy says:

    Is it really worth the hundreds of thousands of pounds it will cost to recall parliament?

    Like

  48. 108
    Duke Nukem says:

    Someone somewhere knows the identity of that pig talking in the video. Will the peace loving community of British muslims come forward with his name?

    Like

  49. 112
    Everyman says:

    Pussyfooting with Muslims for fifty years has lead us to the role of executioner in Iraq.

    How totally damning of the Establishment.

    BBC has just run an Isis recruitment video which inter alia requires face coverings.

    So ….step one…..Ban All Face Covering…….NOW.

    See, it’s easy.

    Power reduced immediately.

    Yes Hammond it is a war so start defending us.

    Liked by 1 person

    • 133

      SERIOUS QUESTION

      At Airport Security :

      — are Muslim ladies waved through if wearing jewellery and religious artefacts
      ( on the basis requesting their removal would be a slight to their faith and social comportment ) resulting in the machine always beeping ?

      — Ditto for burquas/full hijabs etc ? If so how do Passport Control check visual /gender features.?

      — are Muslim ladies put under any pressure whatsoever to remove belts with buckles and/or shoes on the grounds it would affect their perceived religious /social sense of decency?

      –are muslim gentlemen also allowed these privileges on identical or similar grounds ?

      — In the case of a gentleman wearing a full hijab — how would Security be satisfied that she was really a he — or vice versa ??

      Like

  50. 114
    Koba says:

    Cameron doing nothing could be the best thing he ever did!

    Like

  51. 115
    Hiram J Cheeseburger III says:

    Frankly Camoron does his best work when doing nothing at all. It’s when he actually does or says anything that he Fracks up.

    Ban the Berkhampstead. Vote Ukip.

    Like

  52. 116
    Lord Burn'em of Stafford says:

    So he should cancel. …it’s not as though GF has a holiday. ..or Neo…nor the apprentices…all at the same time.

    Like

  53. 117
    David Cameron says:

    As part of my initiative to help hard working families and leader of the High Tax Party I will be raising your taxes. Toodlepip…

    Like


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cynic says:

Can anyone help me? I went on holiday a week ago and returned to find someone has pulled out the stake and Gordon Brown is back and acting as Prime Minister. What did I miss? Has there been a snap election?


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