August 13th, 2014

O’Flynn It to Win It

Once upon a time, a cynical silver-haired Lobby correspondent like Patrick O’Flynn would have been first to take the mickey out of a politician announcing that they would be making an announcement:

And so, this morning we had the big UKIP selection news that everyone was waiting for. Paddy will seek the support of his local party to be UKIP’s parliamentary candidate for Cambridge. He will be trying to unseat weirdy beardy LibDem Dr Julian Huppert, who has a majority of 6,792. Again UKIP are sticking to their policy of running local candidates, O’Flynn went to a Cambridge comp and made it to Cambridge University. Huppert will be praying the student vote doesn’t completely collapse or else he’s in real trouble. Still no news on whether UKIP have managed to convince anyone to take Paddy’s widely-touted old job as head of comms…


  1. 1
  2. 2
    Long John Silver' s parrot says:

    Thank Christ for that .

  3. 3
    Foreign Press Association says:

    FPA 13th August 2014

    The FPA protests in the strongest terms the blatant, incessant, forceful and unorthodox methods employed by the Hamas authorities and their representatives against visiting international journalists in Gaza over the past month.
    The international media are not advocacy organisations and cannot be prevented from reporting by means of threats or pressure, thereby denying their readers and viewers an objective picture from the ground.
    In several cases, foreign reporters working in Gaza have been harassed, threatened or questioned over stories or information they have reported through their news media or by means of social media.
    We are also aware that Hamas is trying to put in place a “vetting” procedure that would, in effect, allow for the blacklisting of specific journalists. Such a procedure is vehemently opposed by the FPA.

  4. 4
    Anonymous says:

    If anything will galvanise the student vote, it’s UKIP. O’Flynn will crash and burn.

  5. 5
    Britisher Bulldog says:

    Who is Patrick O’Flynn? Is he Irish?

  6. 6
    Britisher Bulldog says:

    Excuse me, this subject is about someone called Patrick O’Flynn. I don’t know who he is but it’s something to do with Cambridge, not Gaza or even Gazza. So kindly bog off.

  7. 7
    Baroness Warsi says:

    Fucking Hell !

    Supporters of the Islamic State have been attempting to recruit Jihadists in central London by handing out leaflets to Muslims on the capital’s busiest streets.

    The leaflets, distributed told readers that the “Khilafah [Islamic Caliphate] has been re-established” and ordered them to spread it “across the world.”

    Readers were also told that Muslims must “obey the Khaleef according to the Shariah” – a reference to Shariah law, a fundamentalist interpretation of Islam which is propounded by the Islamic State, previously known as Isis.

    Ghaffar Hussain, managing director of the anti-extremism group Quilliam and contributor to IBTimes UK, told our sister site Newsweek that the group handing out the leafleters were well-known radicals, hailing from the Luton area. He also suggested they are associated with a network known as the al-Muhajiroun.

    According to Hussain, the group were handing out leaflets near Oxford Circus, London’s key tourist hub and the heart of one of the world’s busiest shopping districts. He claims they abused passers-by who confronted them.

    Asmaa Al-Kufaishi, a British-Iraqi university student, tweeted images of an Islamist Group canvassing around Oxford Circus, with posters showing the black flags associated with the Islamic State.

    “This group, promoting Islamic State on Oxford street, racially abused us. They don’t know true Islam,” Al-Kufaishi added.

    News of the leafleting campaign will concern many given that the Islamic State has garnered a reputation for extreme brutality during its campaign of conquest in Iraq and Syria, during which it has gained control of several key cities.

    Hussain said: “This is a very disturbing development but one that should not come as a surprise, since we are aware that around 500 British nationals have joined up with ISIS already.

    “We need to have a zero tolerance policy towards ISIS supporters and recruiters in the UK.”

  8. 8
    Guido announcing says:

    Excellent public annoucement by Guido.
    Its the way that you type them.

  9. 9
    Where's Plod when you need one? says:

    Move along there ,nothing to see chaps.

  10. 10
  11. 11
    Mehdi Hasan says:

    George Galloway MP: “To be lectured on Iraq by that know nothing, raving lunatic ,Owen Jones, is a bit like being told to sit up straight by the Hunchback of Notre Dame”

  12. 12
    Norm Normal says:

    The students voted LibDem because in 2009 Clegg promised to abolish tuition fees.

    12months later, after the election, the LibDems walked away from it. Labour were the ones who introduced tuition fees so who left to vote for?

    Luckily for Labour and the LibDems the present crop of young intelligencia don’t know their arses from their elbows.

    They only know they don’t like Tories or Ukippers because someone in the media told them what to think.

  13. 13
    no thanks says:

    I’m too busy boycotting halal meat.

  14. 14
    Nick Clegg says:

    With the election almost upon us it is time we in the libdem party started to sort the men from the boys.
    So grab yourself a crowbar and help me prise them apart.

  15. 15
    well there's a surprise says:

    I know a few students who voted UKIP.

  16. 16
    rick says:

    A bit un-PC, but I like it.

  17. 17
    Tachybaptus says:

    The Hunchback of Notre Dame, although prevented by nature from sitting up straight himself, had a perfect right to tell other people to do so.

  18. 18
    Mehdi Hasan says:

    ‘Muslim extremists’ hand out leaflets on Oxford Street

    I’m still waiting for a comment from Owen Jones or Laurie Penny !!!!!

  19. 19
    Owen Jones The BBC's go to gob on a stick says:

    Being lectured on anything by that no nothing raving lunatic Owen Jones pisses me off.
    Especially when it’s my licence fee helping pay the C*nt to do it.

  20. 20
    the tailor of Wakefield says:

    are they like Hare Krishna but not as cheerful ?

  21. 21
    illogical says:

    I notice you appear to exhibit a ‘quasimode; approach to most things that continue to upset you Tachy. ;)

  22. 22

    Big news…

    Vote UKIP :-D

  23. 23
    I love Israel says:

    I love Israel because they really piss off left wing wank pit revolutionaries.

  24. 24
    concrete pump says:

    Kind of, if you take away the hate, beards, tiny cocks and Kalashnikovs.

  25. 25
    Anonymous says:

    And some can spell

  26. 26

    Just in case you’re tempted to stick a red cross on your invading forces without the agreement of the ICRC, beware G’eneva Article 44 and 1977 Additional Protocol II:

    But: Honey Badger, he don’t care ;-)

    Vote UKIP :-D

  27. 27
    BBC 24hr rolling bollocks says:

    Latest photo in.
    Taken somewhere near the Bradford municipal tip although that hasn’t yet been verified.

  28. 28
    Targe says:

    Well said.

  29. 29

    It’s almost as if they are too thick to get the hint…

    Even F’rance has given the green light with their m’igrants talk in the Express…

    Vote UKIP :-D

  30. 30
    England Fan says:

    Use of the red cross by our shit football team must also break some convention or other.

  31. 31
    Cameroon returns says:

    Portugese fishmongers panic as Cameroon leaves for snake charming session in Londonistan

  32. 32
    Winston says:

    Name the Western aid agencies supplying aid to the bombed out victims of Eastern Ukraine? What have the UN done?

  33. 33
    Ziggy says:

    No truth in the rumour that Donald Duck and Mickey Mouse are potential candidates for the labour party? Just to give it a lift and a tad more street cred? Also Gordon with his new calculator (£1 on expenses) is now becoming a force to be reckoned with again!

  34. 34
    Colonel Mustard says:

    What will happen to the Labour Vote in Cambridge given that they are fielding an old-fashioned King’s lefty in the UK’s only world class tech cluster? And the Tories have by far the prettiest candidate, even though she is an environmental lawyer. Looks like a four horse race to me – with Julian Huppert surviving because he is the only who understands what will appeal to the high tech, post graduate vote: a higher proportion of the electorate in Cambridge than anywhere else in the UK.

  35. 35

    R’ussia is broadly responsible for the current situation in E’astern U’kraine.

    UN have not got involved yet mainly because security council have been veto’ing. NB: R’ussia started those games this time round also.

    East U’kraine doesn’t need aid – but it does need the M’oscow backed pro-R’ussian militia’s out and for K’iev’s authority in that part of its country to be restored.

    UN peace-keepers or at least observers on the Eastern border could be a good idea moving forward.

    Fair comparison for R’ussian aid:

    Like given a bunch of flowers to a woman you have just r’aped.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  36. 36
    Norm Normal says:

    I mentioned two weeks ago that some of the stilted reporting from Gaza and the refusal to show armed Hamas supporters or rocket firing was due to a fear of being blacklisted.

    Here is it writ large by one of journalism’s most eminent organisations.

  37. 37
    Jimmy says:

    “that everyone was waiting for.”

    Screw Iraq, bollocks to Ukraine, Ebola? Who cares? This is the big one.

  38. 38
    Fuck off George says:

    The slimy cùnt is using the same line about the DUP as they attempt to have his permission to give an Israeli hate talk in the Ulster Hall, Belfast, rescinded.

  39. 39
    Anjem Choudry says:

  40. 40
    Jimmy says:

    From your lips to God’s ears Troll. Sadly most righties have never seen a dictator who didn’t make them go weak at the knees.

  41. 41
    anno yed says:

    Too bad, they see you as their donkey which is why you are paying for wars to defend them.

  42. 42
    Executive Summary says:

    Bradford municipal tip

    aka – City Centre

  43. 43
    Targe says:

    Well said.

  44. 44
    Paniagua says:

    Worried James?

  45. 45
    Yawn says:

    You forgot to mention that most of the media are actually pro-Israel biased or blatant Hasbara centres, so they would whine about anything.

  46. 46
    Ed Miliband says:

    There is no truth to the rumour that Goofy is in the Labour Party.

    People saying Ed is fucking Goofy have no proof whatsoever. I love my wife.

  47. 47
    Yawn says:

    Most likely ZioLoons pretending to be eeeevil Muslims, again.

  48. 48
    King Arthur says:

    Fook off, it’s mine.

  49. 49

    Especially ones who have plenty of cash and don’t mind funding them.

    But it may be wrong to assume that what you see is what you get, or indeed, pay for.

    The law of diminishing returns has already kicked in. Question for P’utin: Is a R’ussian Empire in this day and age economically viable ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  50. 50
    Crisp Ackham says:

    Lefties surely love Israel. Big state, weak economy, media under govt control, lots of Kibbutz coops. Sounds like Miliband’s dream.

  51. 51
    Silent Majority says:

    Bit of a strange move to stand one of UKIP’s leading figures in one of the most unwinnable seats in the region, if that’s what happens.

  52. 52
    Smiz says:

    Why do they keep shouting “Alan Ayckbourn”?

  53. 53
    Fritter Farage, Maltese Junket King says:

    It’s a stunt. The only way UKIP can get seats is in an IKEA sale.

  54. 54

    Badly pronounced: Allahu Akbar

    ‘God is greater’

    Here is an English version:

    Vote UKIP :-D

  55. 55
    Is it me? says:

    Stalin? Mao?

  56. 56
    Rupert says:

    “I am close to announcing where I intend to stand in the general election.”
    Will it be on a pile of freshly produced steaming dung???

  57. 57
    Jimmy the twunt says:

    How’s that thing with Aled Jones going Jimmy. You’ve been ever so quiet since that utter humiliation.

  58. 58
    Jimmy says:

    Indeed, by selecting the Bernard Levin de nos jours, that Lemon Party deposit is looking pretty safe.

  59. 59
    Jimmy the twunt says:

    Screw Iraq? I thought your hero Tony had already done that?

  60. 60
    Manon_des_Source says:

    I believe Cambridge students used to be able to vote in Cambridge and the home constituency.

  61. 61
    Jimmy says:

    Indeed. The memory of whatever on earth it is you’re talking about still stings.

  62. 62
    Robert the Biker says:


  63. 63
    Mick says:

    weirdy beardy lol you’re determined stay in the the 70’s with that arnt you guido. start saying nookie too or perhaps bonk

  64. 64
    Paniagua says:

    I would love to double tap the cūnt, even without some imaginary virgíns.

  65. 65
    Jutes says:

    Go back to Karachi

  66. 66
    The BBC says:

    We will be broadcasting wall-to-wall blatant anti-UKIP propagandina “in the public interest”.

    Don’t forget to pay your licence fee.

  67. 67
    Anonymous says:

    Go back to Karachi

  68. 68
    Strategyst says:

    Cameron talks about sending military to Iraq

    he just needs to give them a couple of quid to get to London, if he really wants to kill jihado nutjobs

  69. 69
    jimmy's jobby says:

    Poll pot

    all fucking lefties and you fucking loved them you khant.

  70. 70
    thick mick says:


    your spelin is stuck in the 1370s

  71. 71
    Bob The Builder. says:

    You’re not THAT Rupert, are you? If so, piss off.

  72. 72
    Bob The Builder. says:

    A wet one.

  73. 73
    Mrs.Garage says:

    Were you born Anonymously? Sounds like it. Wait ’til 7th.May !

  74. 74
    Mrs.Garage says:

    His father might have been. Perhaps NI ? Don’t worry, he’s “one of us”.
    Wish I could say the same for a few others on here.

  75. 75

    Another white male politician – is he diverse enough for the modern voter

  76. 76
    John Bellingham says:

    I knew a tart from Costa Rica called Intelligencia; she wasn’t.

  77. 77
    ShipmanBros. says:

    Give all prisoners the vote. But only on what goes on inside the nick

  78. 78
    SherrytheElder says:

    I heard that Gordo might apply to be London Mayor? Or was that Tony Blair?
    I get so confused sometimes.
    Bring back MacShane – he wasn’t all bad.

  79. 79
    RichUpNorth says:

    Patrick is the former political correspondent at the Daily Express. Became an MEP earlier this year.

    Cambridge, vote UKIP

  80. 80
    RichUpNorth says:

    British Bastards Corporation, should ALL be arrested by Operation Yewtree.

  81. 81
    RichUpNorth says:

    Fuck off, beardy!

  82. 82
    RichUpNorth says:

    So, who’s right, Mohammed Galloway or Junior Jones? There’s only one way to find out. FIGHT!
    Well, at least lash out at one another with your handbags.

  83. 83
    RichUpNorth says:

    I thought the England team just used a white flag. Dear me, what a performance. I’m going to start supporting Germany. They win, and they make the trains run on time.

  84. 84
    RichUpNorth says:

    Yeah! and … always look on the bright side of life.

  85. 85
    Ted Tealeaf says:

    Shit on my cock, you anti-Semite.

  86. 86
    Ted Tealeaf says:

    Crucify the ISIS scum… upside down! Nail some sense into them!

  87. 87
    Barracco Barner says:

    And I’ll bet that plod let them! In the interests of “community cohesion” or some such bollocks!

  88. 88
    Barracco Barner says:

    Canadians: an entire people in denial about the religion of, er, what is it again? They’re so PC they make a BBC news broadcast seem like a Nuremberg rally!

  89. 89
    Anonymous says:

    “Still no news on whether UKIP have managed to convince anyone to take Paddy’s widely-touted old job as head of comms…”
    Instead of just disseminating the wisdom of the great Nige. Any chance they will get someone who can test those ruminations first? For example: Why is a referendum right, but only if it’s likely to achieve something which you wish for?

  90. 90
    Jimmy O Saville says:

    How’s about that then boys and underage girls.

Seen Elsewhere

Users of Gay Hook-Up App Grindr Infected | TechnoGuido
ISIS Raising Funds Online Using Bitcoin | TechnoGuido
UKIP’s Youth Challenge | BBC
ISIS Operative: This Is How We Send Jihadis To Europe | BuzzFeed
Shapps Defends Bashir Defection | Seb Payne
Tory Leadership Contenders Jostle Over Europe | Alex Wickham
Cutting Taxes is Good For You | Art Laffer
Suspects Will Now Have to Prove Innocence | Laura Perrins
Labour Cllr: Cops Shouldn’t Stop Petrol Thieves | HandF Forum
Creeping Cultural Acceptance of Anti-Semitism | Eric Pickles
Time For Greece to Leave Eurozone | Allister Heath

Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS

Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”

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