July 22nd, 2014

Loony Left Coming For Evil Thomas the Tank Engine

Well this is just about the best thing that Comment is Free have ever published. For reasons such as ‘classism, sexism, anti-environmentalism bordering on racism’, kids must be weaned off of the evil that is Thomas the Tank Engine:

“For one, these trains perform tasks dictated by their imperious, little white boss, Sir Topham Hatt (also known as The Fat Controller), whose attire of a top hat, tuxedo and big round belly is just a little too obvious. Basically, he’s the Monopoly dictator of their funky little island.”

“For the record, all the “villains” on Thomas and Friends are the dirty diesel engines. I’d like to think there was a good environmental message in there, but when the good engines pump out white smoke and the bad engines pump out black smoke – and they areall pumping out smoke – it’s not hard to make the leap into the race territory.”

It’s not white smoke you numpty, it’s steam. They are steam engines. Little racist steam engines. Give me strength…


  1. 1
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Peppa Pig must be banned as despite being the most popular cartoon character in the world, she is offensive to Muslims.

  2. 2
    Anonymous says:

    Everyone knows the white smoke is STEAM.

  3. 3
    Rastus Q. McHunter says:

    She thinks that’s a tuxedo. Enough said.

  4. 4
    The Lizzud Returns says:

    Agree with your overall point, but you’re wrong on the smoke — it’s not steam, it’s the smoke from the coal that the engine burns to heat the steam that drives the train.

  5. 5
    Delia says:

    What heats the boiler to make the steam?

    It’s smoke and steam that he spews out.

  6. 6
    Bill Quango MP says:

    ..,, obviously I have no idea if Peppa is offensive or not but I’m trying to get a piece into the Guardian.
    That Grandpa pig is ageist and stereotypical. And Mummy pig , does she have a job? I don’t think so!!

    Ban it! Ban it all!

  7. 7
    The Lizzud Returns says:

    To be fair, it’s probably a mixture.

  8. 8

    Should we perhaps ban Draughts and Chess, as they have black and white pieces? Also the white always gets to start, which seems rather imperious.

  9. 9
    Yeesh, my life says:

    “it’s not hard to make the leap into the race territory.”

    Mental illness is not a laughing matter, although I would make an exception for the loony left whose hilarious antics provide a never ending comedy show.

  10. 10
    tigerowl says:

    Cor, what a none story. About as credible as the EU banning non straight bananas or sausages with too much meat in them.
    It must be a very quiet time in media land for such a story to be published.
    Wonder which will be the first tory MP to quote the story in parliament?
    Labour to ban Thomas the Tank Engine cos it exploits working trains.
    Daily Mail and the Sun love such rubbish stories. Their papers are full of em.
    Sad that some will believe this is an important issue. But that is Britain today.

  11. 11
    Polly T says:

    Get Operation Yewtree to check Thomas out for good measure. Did he ever molest Annie and Clarabel?

  12. 12
    Unlucky Alf says:

    I wonder what Diane Abbott thinks about it.

  13. 13
    ED MILIMONG says:


  14. 14
    Unlucky Alf says:

    I think all the male trains have run into the back of them a few times.

  15. 15

    Has anybody here ever heard of “irony”, “satire” or a “joke”?

  16. 16
    Rastus Q. McHunter says:

    Thomas is the victim here. Annie and Clarabel are always stalking him. There’s even footage of it.

  17. 17
    Blooming Godfrey says:

    Nationalize Thomas now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  18. 18
    Tom says:

    Jumpy Right n’all. If the left don’t like it fine.
    No need for anyone else to stop reading it.
    Unless you want them to stop thinking their left thoughts?
    Barmy thoughts and views are held by both sides.
    No story here. Move on.

  19. 19
    Fizzy Sist says:

    Actually, steam is invisible. What you see coming out of a kettle/boiler is droplets of water that the steam has condensed back to when reaching cooler air.

  20. 20
    Abdul Krim's bum boi says:

    we have, but lefties don’t joke

  21. 21
    Anonymous says:

    Err.. it is smoke. If they pumped out steam, they wouldn’t move.



  22. 22
    Busby Barclay says:

    Next we write about Bill and Ben the Flowerpot transgender speech impedimented squatters who bully a stray plant.

  23. 23
    Vote Tory, get unlimited immigration. says:

    “Diane Abbott” and “thinks” in the same sentence?

  24. 24
    Paul T Horgan says:

    The writer of this Guardian article clearly has not watched enough episodes of this show. After having broadcast all the episodes written by the Rev W Awdry, the studio had to make up their own stories. They created new characters and devoted a whole series to a team of 1930s and 1940s vintage construction vehicles that was very socialistic in nature. Thomas hardly figured in these new stories at all, which were all about cooperation and sharing and not competing.

  25. 25
    still walking into darkness says:

    meanwhile the MSM is stoking up WW3 to kick off in the Ukraine

  26. 26
    Caroline Mucas - looniest of the lefties says:

    How people can play games when the world is melting is beyond me. We should ban all entertainment. Just have sack cloth clothing – made from sustainable hemp.

    Until Earth is free

  27. 27
    Emily "nice legs" Maitliss says:

    A wonderful article and I will be inviting her on the BBC to discuss it.

    I can’t help but notice that most of the people criticising the article are white males therefore part of the patriarchy. And racist too. R4pe culture. Intersectionality.

    Retweet Hadley Freeman/Laurie Penny/ Caroline Criado-Perez

    #Equal rights
    #End Sexism
    #Smash the patriarchy

  28. 28
    Private Eye Baby says:

    God help me I have to grow up in this world…

  29. 29
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:

    Lefties are quite happy to make jokes about a kid mauled to death by a polar bear.

  30. 30
    The science teacher you obviously never listened to says:


    The smoke stack sets on top of the locomotive. Under the smoke stack is a “draft pipe” that goes a couple of feet into the locomotive. It has a tapered shape for easy flow of smoke up and out of the smoke stack. In addition, exhaust steam is used to forcefully blow the smoke out of the smokestack. The exhaust steam from the cylinders goes into an “exhaust nozzle” that is underneath the draft pipe, and it shoots upward to draw smoke along with it. The amount of suction out of the stack is called the “draw.”

    When a locomotive is moving, a mixture of smoke and exhaust steam comes out of the stack. When a locomotive is stationary, there is no exhaust steam to help with the draw. In this case, the engineer opens a valve and some extra steam is blown up through the nozzle to help with the draw to keep the fire hot. This device is called the “blower.”

    This is very useful: http://www.sdrm.org/faqs/boilers/

  31. 31
    Diane Abo says:

    I’m fat and out of control

  32. 32
    Andy Pandy says:

  33. 33
    Benn Gunn says:

    Its a piece in The guardian. lefty bedwetting paper of choice.

    Can you explain why if its a non-story; a made up piece, with no more credibility than straight bananas etc, the Guardian, the paper of truth, published it?

  34. 34
    Jimmy says:

    Sad thing is that Tory Bear/Harry Cole would probably go along with much of this article if he thought it would finally win him some female admiration just like he is obsessed with wanting even more immigration.

  35. 35
    Spartacus says:

    and last week the law was changed in one day by Brokenshite and his Gradma to allow the Government via American Intelligence (oxymoron) to spy on any subversive who tries to speak against bombing Russia.

    As the bbc would say – nothing to see here, except . . . the Royal Baby

  36. 36
    Gray V'digger says:

    Smoke is not a race. Chess and draughts pieces are not Races. Religions are not a Race. Black coffee isn’t Racist. Nor is white coffee. The Grand National is a different kind of race. Me pointing this out isn’t Racist. Yet someone, somewhere, will claim it is. The RACIST gits!

  37. 37
    Ma­­qb­oul says:

    You must be new here.

  38. 38
    The SWP says:


  39. 39
    The Growler says:

    “It’s not white smoke you numpty, it’s steam. They are steam engines.”
    Dear Mr Fawkes just to correct you, it is a combination of smoke and steam, all those steam engine spotters love to stand on a bridge and breathe it all in when a steam engine passes below, brings back a bygone era

  40. 40
    Germaine Greer says:

    When I look at modern women in the media I often think

    “What the fuck have I done?”

  41. 41
    Adolf Putin says:

    Not for much longer, you don’t.

    Mwa-ha ha ha ha haaaa!

  42. 42
    Diane AbbongoBongott says:


  43. 43

    What a bunch of twats! Racist steam engines?

  44. 44
    The Growler says:

    Just like the gases from power station cooling towers, it is just steam!

  45. 45

    I certainly prefer the diesel over my fat little controller *innocent face*

  46. 46
    Beef curtains says:

    MH17: French lash out at British ‘hypocrisy’ over Russian arms sales

  47. 47
    Mycroft says:

    To quote Renee from ‘Allo allo’… “You stupid woman!”

    “Tracy Van Slyke is a fellow at the The Opportunity Agenda, where she researches and writes about the intersection of social justice and pop culture.”

    The Opportunity Agenda… http://opportunityagenda.org/

    A stupid woman with an attractive but entirely empty head.

  48. 48
    Ma­­qb­oul says:

    Let’s bomb the French navy again.

  49. 49
    visibly shaken says:

    their two their four their six their eight
    tax and spend and bigger state
    red and green and yellow and blue
    their all the really useless crew
    all with different roles to play
    round the bike sheds having a gay day
    touching kids or round the bend
    the liblabcon and their friends

    vote ukip

  50. 50
    Ma­­qb­oul says:

    ..and sometimes a little alcohol

  51. 51
    Anonymous says:

    With the madness of Marvel turning Thor into a woman FFS I see no end to PC fascism corrupting childhoods and gods alike.

  52. 52
    James Eadon says:

    With the madness of Marvel turning Thor into a woman FFS I see no end to PC fascism corrupting childhoods and gods alike.

  53. 53
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Even some of the Bedwetters in the comments section can’t believe it. Some of them…

  54. 54
    Anonymous says:

    David Cameron is a hypocrite who should “start by cleaning up his own backyard” before lecturing France on selling military equipment to Russia, the head of Francois Hollande’s ruling Socialist Party has said.

    Jean-Christophe Cambadelis, told i>Tele television on Tuesday:

    Quote Hollande is not backing down. He is delivering the first (ship) despite the fact he is being asked not to.

    This is a false debate led by hypocrites … When you see how many (Russian) oligarchs have sought refuge in London, David Cameron should start by cleaning up his own backyard.

  55. 55

    This makes the case for nuke powered trains.

    Just sayin’

    Vote UKIP :-D

  56. 56
    concrete pump says:

    Joking is soooooo bourgeois.

  57. 57
    Andy Capp says:

    The Russian Oligarchy are secretly funding the Tory party with major donations, but shhhh!…but don’t repeat it too loudly.

  58. 58
    davidc says:

    when one reads her guardian ‘profile’ all becomes clearer


    Tracy Van Slyke is a fellow at the The Opportunity Agenda, where she researches and writes about the intersection of social justice and pop culture. You can follow her on Twitter at @tracyvs.

  59. 59
    Tee Hee says:

    I’ve just read her twitter account. Most think she’s left wing-loon, though some think she might be pulling our legs. I don’t think so. The Graun doesn’t joke about sexism, racism etc.

  60. 60
    The Growler says:

    I thought B’Liar and chums had had you lot euthanized

  61. 61
    Idon'tneednodoctor says:

    Then Ed Miliband’s Bandwagon should be banned, for it is sexist in the extreme. We need a labour all women bandwagon.

  62. 62
    whatAbunchOFnutters says:

    ‘Where the Wild Things Are’ by Sendak is obviously about the ghetto so it’s racist also!

  63. 63

    You mean ‘Call me Dave’ could be ‘Call me Déjvid, Comrade’ ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  64. 64
    Patriot says:

    I watched a Program a week or so ago about the Americans going into I think Walfsburg at the end of the war, they found all the Gestapo files in tacked unlike the rest of the Country.
    When the files were examined there were only twenty Gestapo in the whole Region and not one on every corner as the public was led to believe.
    The People who had been reporting on the People were the People, because they had been put into a state of frenzy by the Propaganda of the Nazis.
    With the way we here all means of communication are being monitored I suppose we are all adding to are own demise.
    PS I have it on good authority, Guido is a Witch.

  65. 65
    Sartorialist says:

    TUXEDO?? It’s a bloody morning suit!


  66. 66
    Jack the Ripper says:

    I think Black goes first in draughts.

  67. 67
    diesel10 says:

    Thanks to hears of watching this stuff (thanks kids) I know for a fat that the fat controller started out as a humble engineer and worked his way up to eventual knighthood and managerial perks. That’s why he’s so respected by the engines.

  68. 68
  69. 69
    Leo t' Abseiler says:

    We should BAN the ghost (spirit) of Mr Speaker Thomas the Merchant Bank engine!

  70. 70
    Anonymous says:

  71. 71
    The only Country in Europe not to have its own paliament is England says:

    I thought the tpo’s were taken of the rails by New Liebore, of coarse the Sottish one was reinstated.

  72. 72
    sick of the greed and lies(still) says:

    A black Fat Controller. Now that is diversity. If she loses her seat in the election, she could do the voice over for the character.
    Actually, thinking about it, the show does need to be banned. There are no ethnic minorities in the entire cast.

  73. 73
    The Master Race says:

  74. 74
    Twampersand mk II says:

    We can’t, we’d have to borrow their aircraft carriers first.

  75. 75
    Unlucky Alf says:

    You can play the tunnel Sal.

  76. 76
    Vote UKIP says:

  77. 77
    Unlucky Alf says:

    You would though wouldn’t you?

  78. 78
    applecore says:

    Very envious.

  79. 79
    Tee Hee says:

    . @tracyvs @commentisfree I feel the same way. I raised similar concerns about a different episode a few months ago: http://t.co/4WWGS0yF0b— Liz DePriest (@LizDePriest) July 22, 2014

  80. 80
    Vote for common sense, vote UKIP says:

  81. 81
    Anonymous says:

  82. 82
    dougded says:

    Nope it isn’t steam, retard.

  83. 83
    Jack Ketch says:

    When will there be a judge-led enquiry into the unexplained disappearance of Mr Golly from Toytown? No body has been found and his business is in the hands of the spiv-like Mr Sparks who cannot explain how he acquired it. Mr Golly’s family are also missing and their home in Darkietown has been demolished.

  84. 84
    frenchjohn says:

    Free the Robinson Golly!

  85. 85
    Kermit says:

    She’d be more in character as Miss Piggy.

  86. 86
    Vlad the Loudhailer says:

    Why is Clyde holding his bollocks?

  87. 87
    sick of the greed and lies(still) says:

    So you are saying that in the past when they were young, the Fat Controller fiddled with their intimate parts?
    Operation Yewtree, please?

  88. 88
    Maximus says:

    Steam is the visible condensate of invisible water vapour. Ditto clouds. AFAIK the word “steam” had meaningful use well before the coming of the concepts of “molecule” and “phase change”.

  89. 89

    Star is just fine – it shows she is embracing diversity.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  90. 90
    John Bellingham says:

    One must feel so sorry for her poor kids. What on earth will they be when they grow up?

  91. 91
    Edward Snowden, The Guardian's hero says:

    She looks a goer thought – and with a name Tracy Van Slyke to boot.

  92. 92
    Truthspeaker says:

    The Grauniad is beyond parody!

  93. 93
    Dorkass says:

    Love your French puy lentil soup recipe.

  94. 94
    Shooty* says:

    To be fair, Thor was actually a frog for a while, so this change makes little difference.

    Also, I haven’t looked into it too much, thor being a pretty sh1te character, but I think it might be in an alternative universe type set up.

    This Thomas related stuff is just beneath contempt though. That’s how people dressed back then, you leftie cretins.

  95. 95
    Andy Pants says:

    I always hold mine!…I find it very comforting.

    But obviously not when in company.

  96. 96
    John Bellingham says:

    He isn’t. So few teams are coming to his Games to play that, like many Scots after September, he will just play with himself.

  97. 97
    Fizzy Sist says:

    Wiki agrees with me.
    “Steam is the technical term for the gaseous phase of water, which is formed when water boils. Technically speaking, in terms of the chemistry and physics, steam is invisible and cannot be seen; however, in common language it is often used to refer to the visible mist or aerosol of water droplets formed as this water vapor condenses in the presence of (cooler) air.”

  98. 98
    The science is settled says:

    Sack cloth clothing is bad. We don’ know the carbon footprint of hemp, which in any case is made by forced labour from Indigenous peoples. We should be without clothing in order to fully monitor global warming.

  99. 99
    Anon says:

    Ignorant bitch.

  100. 100
    Jack Ketch says:

    Jockiewog? Scottiewog? Sweatywog?

  101. 101
    Cardinal Sin says:

    Surely the colour of the steam/smoke depends on whether a new pope has been chosen.

  102. 102
    R McGeddon says:

  103. 103
    concrete pump says:

    Reminds me of those hateful lesbians of the militant left in the 70’s.

  104. 104
    Owen Jones QC says:

    Hamas commits “double war crime” by targeting our citizens and using Palestinians as human shields, says Mehdi Hasan

  105. 105
    Jim Slipp says:

  106. 106
    Andrew K says:

    Is that Germaine “Golly” Greer who used to present Nice Time on children’s television?

  107. 107
    Jimmy says:

    How come I can see a comment awaiting moderation from one of my stalkers?

  108. 108
    Sovietsalami63 says:

    Sovietsalami63 here ,
    British Monarchy had S.I.S murder the tzar of Russia and also murdered Rasputin and blamed it on the tzar.

  109. 109
    Herr Paul Joseph Goebbels says:

    They’ll come around to it. A re-print next week should bring in most of them. The refractory oiks we can deal with using the consensus meme.

  110. 110
    JH103932812-23-9210 says:

    Hmmm, redhead.

    Filthy as hell and a bit of a ‘keeper’, or an absolute unrelenting pain in the arse. They are always one or the other.

  111. 111
    Anonymous says:

  112. 112
    JH103932812-23-9210 says:

    It demonstrates that she does not give a damn about your insidious diversity agenda, where whíte people are expected to constantly walk on eggshells and give ground without a whimper.

  113. 113
    BBC says:

    Of course we will be running with this narrative right across our range of output.

    Except for Even Davis who is running a piece about blood poisoning in cocks with piercings due to fecal ingress.

  114. 114
    Maximus says:

    Why does that remind me of the Duchess in Alice?

  115. 115
    approval yet to be granted says:

    Why is Clyde not wearing full Scottish attire, as approved by the Scotish Fat control, who is fat and named after a oilly fish.

  116. 116
    Big D says:

    Save Judy from Mr Punch and free the Teletubbies .

  117. 117
    Unlucky Alf says:

    Because you’re a c’unt?

  118. 118
    Genghiz the kahn says:

    Thomas liked to buffer up to them and then have a quick coupling in the dark.

  119. 119
    Uncle Joe says:

    The cadres at Agitprop are clearly failing. Only the most stringent of purges can now bring them back into line with Socialist Realism. All department heads are to be shot, their families deported. Cadres that have displayed an inability to correctly determine the cultural needs of the masses are to be given 10 years in a labour camp.

  120. 120
    Philly Phanatic says:

    Didn’t think immigaration had got that far north.

  121. 121
    Gloria Stitz says:

    In Tacked?!!!!!

  122. 122
    Anonymous says:

    Russia Says Has Photos Of Ukraine Deploying BUK Missiles In East, Radar Proof Of Warplanes In MH17 Vicinity


  123. 123
    Uncle Joe says:

    She needs to be careful I don’t have a sense of humour. Cadres engaged in cultural work need to pay attention to the party line. This one sounds like a Trot to me.
    Always better to purge first ask questions later.

  124. 124
    Turquoise dreams says:

    Mr Bombshell is wrong.

  125. 125
    The Common Denominator is the BBC says:

    Blimey. They’ll be saying that Blue Peter rigs votes and their presenters take cocaine, that Jim’ll fix it was a perv, Rolf Harris had two little boys, It’s a knock out was an underage knocking shop and Uncle Frank Bough did drugs and Prostitutes.

  126. 126
    Anonymous says:

  127. 127
    G is for Golly says:

    The Scottish Golly even has G for Golly on the front.

  128. 128
    non taxable pikey says:

    Some of the more moronic politicians in the UK want Turkey in the EU. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-28417589

  129. 129
    The BBC says:

    We like to show pictures of Steam coming out of power station cooling towers and call it polluting smoke.

  130. 130
    táxpáyér says:

    Don’t tell them water vapour is a much much more potent “greenhouse” gas than the plantfood gas CO2.

  131. 131
    táxpáyér says:

    Mrs Wyp-Hand?


  132. 132
    táxpáyér says:

    Although all that tax looted from workers is under no circumstances akin to forced labour…

  133. 133
    Conservative Funded Pro Conservative Troll says:

    Ed Miliband is a clueless idealistic immature socialist lefty.

    Vote Labour :)

  134. 134
    Henny Lenry says:

    All dem trains are white. We need sum black trains, innit.

  135. 135
    Owly Fawns says:

    Can’t see why they are complaining Thomas the Tank is already been politically corrected in the CGI version and is boring to watch, it has it’s little brown kids and the Fat Controller isn’t refereed to as the fat controller but just the controller, bring back the old versions, it may be great for a 2/3 year to watch but dads and grandparents were brought up on the original none politically correct honest Thomas the Tank episodes.

  136. 136
    Smoke and mirrors says:

    Oh dear. Try again. They do turn out smoke. Thick, globulous smoky ash clouds. look at the underside of any bridge they used to go under. Still covered in soot.

    You don’t need to apologise to the Guardian; they won’t know either.

  137. 137
    Maximus says:

    As I said. Does Wiki have a view on which came first – common language or technical terminology?

  138. 138
    Bob Crows Last Word on the Matter says:

    Do they have facking union representation these tanks?

  139. 139
  140. 140
    Angela Merkel says:

    You’re assuming they’re golliwogs. They might just be hausfrauen who spent too much time in the sun. We are early getting to the sunbeds, as you may have noticed.

  141. 141
    Jack Dromey says:

    Where is the Big Black Cock metaphor?

  142. 142
    Maximus says:

    Is one meant to pronounce it as rhyming with Dick or with the word commonly found following Bull?

  143. 143
    Owly Fawns says:

    La La land next door, why would the British monarchy murder the Tsar they were fkin relatives and a quiet word could have changed the world, no wonder the prisons are full and it shows it letting plant pots like you running loose

  144. 144
    cho cho says:

    in 100 years when they look back at the lies and dodgyness of the climate bores
    it will be seem in the same context as the power of the church 200 years ago.
    a means to an end for a few; taxing and scaring the good people.

    it is nearly july and i cant even put my toe in the sea water on the northumbrian coast.

    these are clever people screwing the good people of britain.

  145. 145
    Harriet Harman says:

    It’s appalling that children are being bombarded with such subversive and perverted filth.

    What was that, Mr Savile, could I write a press release demanding the age of consent be abolished? Of course.

  146. 146
    Lefties are beyond madness says:

    The lunatic lefties are taking us to hell in a handcart. Why….?

    It will only the handcarts that will remain when they have finished they would have already shot all the horses.

  147. 147
    Jack Pieman says:

    It does when I’m playing Santiago.

  148. 148
    Banned says:

    Labour front benchers?

  149. 149
    MSM4 says:

    Set in glue or nailed to the perch?

  150. 150
    táxpáyér says:

    The cross Sodor High speed line from Curryton to the fat controllers friends caused Sodor to go bankrupt.

  151. 151
    Genghiz the kahn says:

    Clyde the spawn of Salmong and Sturgeon?

  152. 152
    Anonymous says:

    I tried http://www.bbc.com but it was full of a different sort of cocks

  153. 153
    Seth the pig farmer says:

    Steam trains are pretty sensitive to suggestions of race related smoke insults, and emit a changing mix of both white and black smoke to indicate their impeccable PC credentials.

  154. 154
    Cinna says:

    Yes, bring back the full fat version.

  155. 155
    táxpáyér says:

    Extremely poor taste, I nearly pissed myself laughing.

  156. 156
    Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change says:

    Sorry but our computer models are right. We just need to find out how to change reality to fit our forecasts.

  157. 157
    Old Timer says:

    I agree Fizzy,

  158. 158
    táxpáyér says:

    Putin is not so secretly funding anti-frackers such as Greenpeace but you won’t hear as the media is bought and paid for.

  159. 159
    Gordon says:

    Can’t some types of frog change sexes? I’m sure this was the problem in Jurassic Park that let the dinosaurs breed despite all being fenale

  160. 160
    táxpáyér says:

  161. 161
    táxpáyér says:

    The only opportunity left for kids mal-educated by leftists is nepotism.

  162. 162
    Mr Angry says:

    Surely it is water vapour not steam …

  163. 163
    Fishy says:

    I wonder how many times he slid into Box Tunnel?

  164. 164
    Fishy says:

    Is that David Miliband’s?

  165. 165
    Ghost of Lady Thatcher says:

    This is brilliant can we get a manifesto commitment from Harriet Harman or Ed Milliband on this? I don’t know if it’s in the Lib Dem or Green manifestos but I think we should be told.

  166. 166
    Master Bates says:

    What about Captain Pugwash?
    Now, there’s political correctness!

  167. 167
    táxpáyér says:

    Because guido’s blog is a bit crap and relies on cookies.

  168. 168
    táxpáyér says:

    Was that before or after the space aliens hollowed out the world to hide atlantis?

  169. 169
    Al Salil says:

    This woman (Tracy van Slyke) has done all critics of the Guardian a massive favour. Writing about white smoke instead of vapor simply reinforces the old stereotype that lefty women have no idea about technical issues.

  170. 170
    Dorkass says:

    wtf is a chocolate cakeboss? A Mark Oaten sort of thing?

  171. 171
    Jimmy says:

    Will Scameron be calling for an end to male genital mutilation? Circumcision should be a crime too.

  172. 172
    Buckwheat says:

    “Africanized g*lliw*gs,” also known as “Pickaninnies.”

    And I oughta know.

  173. 173
    The BBC's Toenails Robinson says:

    Sorry to interrupt, but I think that I might have forgot to mention that Ed Miliband was in Washington yesterday, meeting President Obama in the WHITE HOUSE

  174. 174
    Diane Abbott says:

    As the nation’s foremost expert on what is WAYCIST, as well as on private schools and KFC food, I should have been consulted on this.

  175. 175
    Anonymous says:

  176. 176
    Radio 4 says:

    One of our prats the other morning said – “Up next, deep diving without tanks and oxygen …. blah blah’

    It’s not fucking oxygen it’s fucking air you thick lefty bedshitting mong.

    For a kick off pure oxygen is toxic below 6m in depth (all down to partial pressure) to humans so wouldn’t really be recommended for deep diving,

  177. 177
    Owen Jones says:

    Right on Sister.

  178. 178

    #fail : They can’t spin this one – plane in wrong place doesn’t cut it when they have IFF on the Buk.

    So far only 282 of the 295 or so bodies have been recovered.

    The refrigerated trains were hit by a power outage over night which explains in part why the train has been causing a bit of a stink:


    Apparently still body parts rotting in the fields at the crash site.

    First shipment due back Wednesday:

    From R’ussia with Love.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  179. 179
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:


  180. 180

    The great god Thor
    Rode out to war
    Upon his favourite filly.
    “I’M THOR!” he cried.
    The horse replied
    “You forgot your thaddle, thiily!”

  181. 181
    Mr Angry says:

    Thor was French? When

  182. 182
    Lavrentiy Beria says:

    Her bourgeous criticisms of the organization of railways is self-evidently a threat to the development of the railway infrastructure and thereby to the progress of the glorious revolution. Would you like me to deal with her Comrade Stalin?

  183. 183
    Pol Potty says:

    Indeed it is water vapour as steam is invisible.

    It is not racist water vapour, though.

  184. 184
    Anonymous says:

  185. 185
    Ed Davey says:

    Maybe of we erected a wind turbine on the top of each of them they would be more green.

    Plus maybe some solar panels and containers for collecting rain water and composting cuttings.

  186. 186
    Neil Down says:

    I did a minor in Communication Studies at university (because a couple of modules let me play with video cameras!) and I can tell you that this is exactly the sort of crap academics come out with. They’ll sit down with a Seth Rogen film or a Cheryl Cole video and micro-analyse it till they get the message out of it they want to write about. Whether it was intended or even there is irrelevant to them.

  187. 187
    Owen Patterson says:

    And badger catchers on the front of them

  188. 188
    Freya says:

    Thor dressed up as me once, you know, so as to recover his stolen hammer, or so he said. He looked a bit weird in drag, with his big red beard, but he certainly threw himself into the part.

  189. 189
    Primate says:

    It’s as daft as those twats who called the vatican racist because they let out white or black smoke to indicate progress.

    The left is so stupid, it must hurt.

  190. 190
    Ron Davies says:

    Don’t mention the badgers

  191. 191
    Looks like she's got form on this subject matter says:

  192. 192
    Angela Merkel says:

    Just 3 well tanned German women who have been doing their duty occupying a sunbed from sunrise to sunset. WE OCCUPY ALL THE SUNBEDS AT ALL TIMES.

  193. 193
    Diane Abbott says:

    I’ve eaten mine.

  194. 194
    Tinsel Tits says:

    Does it set the metal detectors off at Heathrow?

  195. 195
    Harriet Harman says:

    And there are not enough female engines – or honorary females like my husband Jack.

  196. 196
    Ockham's Razor says:

    There may be another pair of missiles left over from recent usage on a Russian BUK M2A that has recently returned from activities. These could be used to destroy Thomas for good,

  197. 197
    Maximus says:

    So you’ve spotted what I did – the USSA’s sanctions against Russia are designed to hurt Germany. You read that right: the action is in Ukraine, but the target is Germany.

  198. 198
    Roma Bert. says:

    Waaacist white smoke?

  199. 199
    Norma Stitz says:

    David Lammy thought the white/black smoke from the Sistine Chapel had racist overtone – white for a white Pope, black for a black one.. What a plonker.

  200. 200
    Milimarx says:


  201. 201
    Norma Stitz says:

    How can you spell a big, scary word like propaganda correctly and fall flat on your arse with ‘intact?’

  202. 202
    Phucumall says:

    Err its Gollywog if you don’t mind

  203. 203
    Eagle Bros says:

    We’re still here.

  204. 204
    A Bed says:

    Are you going to wet me again?

  205. 205
    Norma Stitz says:

    Hi Germaine, loved that pic of you in ‘Suck’ magazine, stark naked with your legs behind your ears and a muff like a bear trapper’s hat. Up the sisterhood!

  206. 206
    Permanently affronted says:

    They both represent humans, of course they look fucking similar you fucking moron.

  207. 207
    waycists are evwyware says:

    because you’re a small-minded jocko waycist

  208. 208
    Norma Stitz says:

    Why do they have twelve legs between three of them?

  209. 209
    J-o-o T-e-r-r-o-r-i-s-t-s says:

    68th anniversary of the murder of 28 Britons by Z-i-o-n-i-s-t T-e-r-r-o-r-i-s-t-s, at the King David Hotel.

  210. 210
    Don't waite for Dave to do anything says:

    Vote UKIP and stand up to leftist bullshit.

  211. 211
    Anonymous says:

    Poe’s Law, named after its author Nathan Poe, is an Internet adage reflecting the idea that without a clear indication of the author’s intent, it is difficult or impossible to tell the difference between an expression of sincere extremism and a parody of extremism.

    Poe’s law, in broader form, states:

    Without a blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of extremism or fundamentalism that someone won’t mistake for the real thing.

  212. 212
    Ben Dover says:

    There may be questions around male circumcision. However to compare cutting off a bit of loose skin, something done as a medical procedure in many countries for health reasons, to hacking off an 11 year old girl’s clitoris so she can’t experience sexual pleasure is an insult to the victims of this. It’s like comparing plastic surgery to chopping people’s hands and feet off. And you’re only bringing it up because lefties like you get all uncomfortable when your favourite minority is being criticised.

  213. 213
    Fred the pensioner says:

    The God of War rode out one day on his favourite filly.
    “I’m Thor”, he cried.
    His horse replied, “You forgot your thaddle, thilly”.

  214. 214
    Vlad the New Impaler says:

    BUK M2A, no. But we have Yars RS-24 which will. Just send us the money, and it’s as good as done.

  215. 215
    Doggie Fashion says:

    Sir Topham Hatt does NOT wear a Tuxedo (a.k.a. Dinner Jacket, not suit) he wears a Morning Coat (not suit). What utter, utter plebs and to think Alan Rusbridger went to my school – he was unpopular then as well.

  216. 216
    Fred the pensioner says:

    Posted mine before I saw yours.

    Great minds etc …

  217. 217

    Sock-puppet ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  218. 218
    So you think Thomas is offensive? Get your laughing gear around this! says:

  219. 219
    Fred the pensioner says:

    Since when did ‘throughout’ become ‘across’?

    Also in my book a ‘platform’ is what you stand on whilst waiting for a train )otherwise known as a ‘podium’.

  220. 220
    Only chavs shop at Tesco says:

    Harriet Harridan should be banned. She’s offensive to women, to voters, to men, to children, to her colleagues and to anyone with an IQ higher than 4.

  221. 221
    Only chavs shop at Tesco says:

    How about Ten Little *******? There’s political correctness!

  222. 222
    Mycroft says:

    Indeed, 3rd wife was a ‘strawberry blond’… she was a ‘keeper’ and lasted longer than any other.

  223. 223
    Mycroft says:

    Edible… very very edible.

  224. 224
    Dangerous Brian says:

    Boom Boom.

  225. 225
    cured lefty says:

    Reminds me of that old joke “what does liz taylor wear behind her ears?……..her ankles

  226. 226
    Diddley says:

    Plainly nothing has been through the author’s ‘tunnel’ in years, the dreary bint.

  227. 227
    Jack the Ripper says:

    Has Chris Huhne changed the points yet?

  228. 228
    Anonymous says:

    Why are they speaking English?

  229. 229

    Free Willy with each pair of balls.

  230. 230
    Anonymous says:

    “Our daycare provider” #TheyReallyAreUnderTehBed

  231. 231
    The only Country in Europe not to have a Parliament is England says:

    They might be of there soon if they keep trying to humiliate the Bear

  232. 232
    Jimmy says:

    The Guardian ran a similar artical about Sexist Thomas 2 years ago.


  233. 233
    Ooh, you are awful! says:

    No gay steam engines either, although the trucks do get shunted up the rear quite a bit.

  234. 234
    Seaman Staines says:

    Roger the cabin boy – that’s political correct.

  235. 235
    Humpty Dumpty says:

    I didn’t

  236. 236

    As well as car exhausts on cold days so that it looks like smoke. Works every time!

  237. 237

    Black…or is it Bleck Steam?

  238. 238
    I agree says:

    I have got 2 – found them in a charity shop; collectors’ items now

  239. 239
    cured lefty says:

    Its a con job she wants to just like alli blabbershite brown get on the “interview a lefty gobshite circuit” so lusted after by the bbc.

  240. 240

    We know all about your little holes and what you got up to at Burlington. Indeed, we have been reprogramming our visiting cards. Your MoD are soooo predictable!

  241. 241
    Da Daaa says:

    And after shagging earthing, he tried ti impress her by shouting “I’m Thor!”

    She replied,
    “I’m tho thore that I can’t even pith!”

  242. 242
    mikerouse says:

    In Series Two the engines formed a deputation and raised grievances with the Fat Controller during a series of incidents concerning Diesel and the Great Western Engine called Duck. Democracy at work. Also, Toby owe his continued existence to a kind Fat Controller who saved him from the scrapheap in Series One. Kindness to those in need and not scrapping something just because it is old. He did it again when he saved Terence the Tractor and placed him at the Vicarage. Let’s remember however these are engines, not people, despite their faces. They are treated as working engines. Unlike that Chuggington thing, which is just weird.

  243. 243
    Eco-Mong says:

    He is green.

  244. 244
    Fishy says:

    Section 26

  245. 245
    Shlomo says:

    You are all anti-semites!

  246. 246
    Gordon the Gay Engine says:

    Speak for yourself ducky.

  247. 247
    The Bottle Fed Triplet says:

    A science teacher from America perhaps. The exhaust steam from the steam chest on the shuttle valve can be put through a “blast pipe” to aid the draught on the furnace. And the steam locomotive was invented where, boy?

  248. 248
    The Bottle Fed Triplet says:

    Steam can be saturated and it can also have a “dryness fraction” to denote the percentage of water entrained in the actual steam itself. Some of know this, others have to run to Wikipedia.

  249. 249
    The Bottle Fed Triplet says:

    Try water vapour, more descriptive.

  250. 250


    ROTHERHAM Labour Party councillor Barry Dodson has been charged with child rape offenses less than three weeks after stepping down as Labour Lord Mayor.

    Acting on a local police tip off a prominent figure in the local Labour party council asked Mayor Dodson to step down before an inevitable police investigation.

    The Rotherham East councillor had resigned from the Labour Party on Friday but said he was staying on as a (((PIE?))) independent.

    South Yorkshire Police confirmed a 66-year-old Rotherham man had been arrested on Friday and had been released on bail.

    Cllr Dodson was sworn in as Lord Mayor on June 6 but quit exactly three weeks later.

    He has made no comment since except that the resignation was for “personal reasons”.

    Follow us on twitter – Labour25 twitter

  251. 251



    …….OOPS !

  252. 252

    Tracy Van Slyke ?

    Probably a repressed Dyke.

  253. 253
    Llareggub says:

    Oh for fuck’s sake!

    Can these lefties not figure out this kind of horse shit just makes them a laughing stock?

  254. 254
    non taxable pikey says:

    Euston, we have a problem.

  255. 255
    The Bottle Fed Triplet says:

    What’s an “amazing raft”? Is it one of those things that inflates when a ship sinks?

  256. 256
    Grimy Miner says:

    Just had to share this with you! It is disgraceful!
    Absolutely disgusting behaviour l saw today. I was at the park when l saw a man & a woman having an almighty argument in front of some young kids when suddenly she smacked the bloke on the head & it all kicked off. There was a massive brawl & someone called the police. This poor copper turned up on his own & took his baton to the bloke, the guy managed to snatch it off him & started whacking the copper AND his wife. I couldn’t believe what l was seeing. Then out of nowhere a crocodile crept up & stole all the sausages!

  257. 257
    Dave the pleb says:

    What about Snoopy the dog in Peanuts? Dogs are offensive to Muslims, so he’s got to go as well. (Also Muttley in Wacky Races, Odie the dog in Garfield, Deputy Dawg, and K-9.)

  258. 258
    Pete says:

    Wikipedia is a pile of shite with an expressed preference for concensus over fact. Anyone who cites Wikipedia in support of their case merely displays their stupidity.

  259. 259
    The Westminster Puppet Show says:

    Sooty’s f@*ked then

  260. 260
    Jacky Treehorn says:

    I love it when lefties come out with things like this, it enforces my feelings of superiority over the idiots.

  261. 261
    Reverend Audrey says:

    The Guardian’s daily print run is some 208 000. There are about 45 million adults in multinational UK, a fair number have English as a first language. Its staff presumably think it is of national importance, providing both selected information and moral guidance to an educated elite. Short on facts, long on opinion.

    Intellectual friends frequently ask me if I read it. I reply that if I had a copy I would be pleased to roll it into a ball and kick it from arseholes to Christmas.

  262. 262
    Anonymous says:

    hahaha..you seriousley need to book into a mental home you stupid man…try getting our useless government sorting out the major threat of TERRORISM in this country before you start picking on defenceless CARTOONS….

  263. 263
    Clueless but literate says:

    ‘ … off of … ‘?

  264. 264
  265. 265
    Rather annoyed says:

    Sad bitch with no life .
    The BBC would love her .

  266. 266
    HAMAS says:

    coz we asked them to .

  267. 267
    HAMAS says:

    Keeps the production costs down too. Remember we are Pallywood not fuck,n Hollywood

  268. 268
    Hugh Janus says:

    Trust The Guardian to find all sorts of -isms in a harmless children’s story. This tofu-weaving broken-brained stroker wants to get her slack arse down to a historic railway and see what colour the smoke coming out of a coal-burning locomotive is and then nip over to check out what colour diesel exhaust is, the potty muppet.

  269. 269
    Hugh Janus says:

    A Septic by all accounts. With massive cans… :)

  270. 270

    {“Assistant Chief Constable Nikki Holland said: “We have since spoken to the victim, apologized for the delay and are investigating the incident. This delay was unacceptable and we have referred the matter to the Independent Police Complaints Commission.”

    Apologised for the delay ?? What like about forty years ???!!!

  271. 271
    Hugh Janus says:

    Burning coal produces smoke, not steam. The steam mostly comes out of the cylinders and the smoke mostly comes out of the smokestack on top. Both are hideously white. Although when accelerating and the boiler is drawing harder soot may come through giving the smoke a grey hue. In other words, it goes from being white to being coloured.

    Not that this tossbotty bint would think to let facts get in the way of a good bit of self-loathing guilt-ridden yoghurt-knitting. >:(

  272. 272
    Hugh Janus says:

    To clarify, burning coal produces smoke, not steam – which is a product of the heat thus produced when applied to a pressure vessel full of water.

    There’s far too many pedants around these days. Ought to be a law against it – which there probably will amongst the thousand or so a year we can look forward to if Labour get back in.

  273. 273
    Hugh Janus says:

    HAMAS – Hiding Amongst Mosques And Schools

  274. 274
    3rd paras says:

    If Menachem Begin was still alive today, he would still be a Hunt of a terrorist.

  275. 275
    Victoria Nuland and Ann Applebaum says:

    It is still totally unclear. Land-to-air missiles have a signature that is very easy to spot and equally easy to back track. The US had satellites over the area at the time plus god knowns how much surveillance on the ground, yet they have only shown us a graphic which was, frankly, pathetic. My son could have mocked up a better picture.

    Too much here which does not add up. Cui bono is the first rule.

    Vote UKIP, btw.

  276. 276

    No R’ussia link to the shooting down of the plane, but they created the conditions for the downing by arming the separatists:


    This is known, it is what happened after the separatists shot down the plane that raises serious questions about R’ussia.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  277. 277
    Vote UKIP says:

    I have it on good authority that this is comment will only publish ridcilious content.

  278. 278
    So confused says:

    Charles Crawford takes credit for content in Guido’s blog space?

    Guido, who has always lashed DM types for lifting copy, does same?

    Guido, anyone want to set Craword straight?

  279. 279
    Llareggub says:

    My three-year-old is nuts about Thomas. I have noticed that she’s recently taken to goose-stepping around the living room and yelling “Sieg Heil”.

  280. 280

    At risk of being a twat, y’all should have all realised by now that water vapour is an invisible gas. So is steam. The white shit is condensed liquid water droplets, same as in a cloud. Or fog. Did no-one pay attention in physics at school? Don’t start me on the triple point of water, people…

  281. 281

    …..and again, water vapour is an INVISISBLE GAS. The white cloudy stuff is liquid water droplets condensing (onto a hygroscopic nucleus). Like, uh, all clouds and fog ever. So it ain’t steam and it ain’t water vapour, descriptiveness and retardation notwithstanding.

  282. 282
    Baz says:

    If she’s aiming at parody [surely?], she should know her subject in more depth. Her ignorant and infantile article isn’t funny and doesn’t tell us anything, as her knowledge of and interest in railways appears to be zero.

    The silly bint doesn’t even recognise the distinction between a train and a locomotive. Everyone knows the engines, male, do all the work whilst coaches Annie and Clarabel just sit and twitter away about all the good rides they’ve given.

  283. 283
    Baz says:

    I did have a lefty academic instruct me some years ago about how nostalgia for steam and the better railway of yore was somehow “racist”. The tortured reasoning being that British history and appreciation of our industrial past was not “inclusive”. FFS.

  284. 284
    Baz says:

    She can’t even get the distinction between “train” and “engine”, so I’m pretty sure the word “locomotive”, never mind the components of its physical ouputs, would sail right over her curls. What made her feel qualified to attempt these ludicrous extrapolations, oops “consciousness raising”, from a position of such proudly-displayed ignorance?

  285. 285
    An American empty-headed bimbo (race immaterial) says:

    Practising hard to be like me!!

  286. 286
    Hugh Janus says:

    “What made her feel qualified…?”

    Being at The Guardian. It’s a disease rather than a qualification, however.

  287. 287
    Hugh Janus says:

    Hattie Harmzkidz is not offensive to children. She’s downright bloody dangerous for children!

    Feeling peckish, Hattie? How about a nice slice of PIE…?

  288. 288
    Juan Kerr says:

    Allegedly someone has done a porno version of TTTE.

  289. 289
    Unbalanced Views says:

    She needs to spend less time writing bildge about kids TV shows and more cleaning behind the fridge and doing the dishes, lazy bitch

  290. 290
    Hugh Janus says:

    Wouldn’t surprise me – people do porn parodies of everything. Shaving Ryan’s Privates, for example.

  291. 291
    Four-eyed English Genius says:

    Any issues, more like!

  292. 292
    Four-eyed English Genius says:

    I do not recall seeing a single electric locomotive or train in any Thomas episode. If that is not rank discrimination, what is? Where is Mad Hattie when you need her?

  293. 293
    Anonymous says:

    Thomas spends all day riding along those rails of entitlement, he really needs to check his privilege.

  294. 294
  295. 295
    geordieboy says:

    Too energetic try fly swatting with it.

  296. 296
    geordieboy says:

    Gather up all the Lefties and lock them in a cinema and give them a three piece entertainment of Harry Brown,for starters followed by Grand Turino and for dessert Blazing Saddles.

  297. 297
    Anonymous says:

    Missing Word Game.

    For some reason, defenders of the Golly only mention its first name. So, what is its last name?

  298. 298
    Anonymous says:

    Top Ten porn parodies:

    On Her Majesty’s Secret Cervix

    Lawrence of a Labia

    Sperms of Endearment.

    Catcher in the Rear

    Forest Hump

    Position: Impossible

    Flesh Gordon

    On Golden Blonde

    Inspect Her Gadget

    Titty-Titty Gang Bang

  299. 299
    Anonymous says:

    Careful UKIP – your roots are starting to show.

  300. 300
    Anonymous says:

    And really, “that theme song makes me scream.” If nothing else, can we not agree on that one?

  301. 301
    UK Fred says:

    The one in the bass drum?

  302. 302
    UK Fred says:

    And Wile E Coyote

  303. 303
    UK Fred says:

    I thought it was compulsory.

  304. 304
    UK Fred says:

    If the target was one of the terrorists who used an ambulance to get from one place to another without being fired on, then the sniper should have got the target right first time and saved wasting a second bullet.

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