July 21st, 2014

Crosby Keeps in Running With No 10

Lynton Crosby had a hand in telling several ministers to jog on in last week’s reshuffle, and it seems he certainly knows how to keep in the running with the party leadership. Guido hears the fifty-something campaign guru has, in an effort to be fighting fit for the election, taken on the same personal trainer employed by the Camerons. This one could run and run…


  1. 1
    pant in the cabinet says:

    Knees up, knees up, knees up

  2. 2
    Roma Bert. says:

    Sack the Squeaker, would be a good starting point!

  3. 3
    Another Crosbie who is not breaking out into a sweat for anyone not even for this clammy weather. says:

    Come on the Labour is full of of intellectually crippled fuck ups and all sorts of weirdos, they are not hard to beat. Unfortunately, weirdos & thickos keep voting for them.

  4. 4
    The'll be a welcome in my hillside says:

    Taking little boys from behind was all the exercise I needed……look you.

  5. 5
    Glasgow Games 2014 says:

    Don’t forget to feign interest in me when someone from the BBC asks you a question.

    Remember to have something prepared about your favourite sport, athlete or final. It’s important, they are sure to ask and you don’t want to look stupid do you?

  6. 6
    Cool Crosbie practising with a HoWanTu Guru says:

    I am practising Ho Wan Tu and mastering the sticking of a needle in the eye with joonky skum. I win.

  7. 7
    History Repeats Itself says:

    Well he lost the election for Michael Howard. Perhaps he can do the same again for David Cameron.

  8. 8
    concrete pump says:

    Michael Howard lost the election for Michael Howard.

    Cameron will do the same.

  9. 9

    What about his going on a charity jog from Lynton to Crosby?

  10. 10
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Run and run.

    Like dysentery?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  11. 11
    Sea, sand and Liverpool says:

    Camoron has already lost the May 2015 election, like his bessy mate who runs the Liebour party, one is a weirdo and one thinks he’s warmonger Bliar, both would help the country if they bogged off and found a real job, like working down the sewers as that’s all they have produced since they popped up from the sewer in High Holborn.

  12. 12
    David Cameron says:

    My values are J e w i s h values

  13. 13
    cat out of the bag says:

    Like when you have a leak in your incontinence pants more like.

  14. 14
    non taxable pikey says:

    Best personal trainer for Camoron would be a lock on the Fridge and a lost key.

  15. 15
    Yeesh, my life says:


    Force hamas to lay down their weapons and surrender, its the humanitarian thing to do and would save many lives and would lead to peace.


    All hamas has to do is hand over its weapons and commit to peaceful dialogue and they would get everything they claim they want.


    When you strip away the “peace’ claptrap the islamists and their useful idiot collaborators dont want peace at all, they want war and death and most importantly for them all the death porn they can use against Israel in the media battle being fought on the airwaves.

  16. 16
    Sea, sand and Liverpool says:

    They’d have to disinfect the roads after they jogged on them, a better bet would be for them to jog off.

  17. 17
    Engineer says:

    Crosby had a hand in asking several ministers to jog on in last weeks reshuffle, did he?

    Sacking competent ministers and replacing them with window-dressing is an interesting election strategy, but sacking incompetent ministers and replacing them with window-dressing might have been even better.

  18. 18
    FairBobby says:

    That’s not Cameron’s body, he’s twice that size! It’s a fiddled photo, designed to deceive.

  19. 19
    Ockham's Razor says:

    More like what?

    You are linguistically incontinent, so it would appear.

  20. 20
    Prince Philip says:

    Guido! Still ignoring the fake sheikh story? I read you tried to smear Peter Jukes whilst your mate was being uncovered as a liar in court.

    What a true low life liar you really are. Man of the people? Nope. Just another corrupt Murdoch mouthpiece.

    Keep it up – I’m sure your advertisers will be happy to be associated with you.

  21. 21
    The Publik says:

    We hope Dave liked sex and travel.

  22. 22
    Diane Abbopotamus says:

    If that Michelle Obama gained 150lbs, got her booty enhanced and spoke in ebonics she’d be a perfect role model for girls-of-colour

  23. 23

    Talk about getting fighting fit!

  24. 24
    cat out of the bag says:

    You don’t fucking talk proper mate.

  25. 25
    The BBC One Show says:

    Did you notice how we got a person of ‘colour’ to introduce our article about the games in Glasgow?

    Most people in Britain are black, Asian or minority ethnic.

    You’re a racist bigot if you disagree.

  26. 26
    Eric Schön says:

    If I know my Star Trek, runner number 462 won’t make it to the end of the episode.

  27. 27
    Ockham's Razor says:

    I am most dreadfully sorry.

    It woz the way I woz brung up. *burps*

    Vote UKIP :-D

  28. 28
    Cool Crosbie says:

    Running is not necessarily good for you and could in fact do permanent damage. But hey ho what do I know? Each to their own! :)

  29. 29
    Anonymous says:

    Bercow. Fuck off you little gay twat and take that fanny full of puss wife of tour with you,

  30. 30
    Mehdi Hasan says:

    Owen Jones has called for the assassination of Hamas political leader, Khaled Mashaal, currently residing in Qatar.”<Sort it

  31. 31

    MH17: Wish you were here. R.I.P

    Vote UKIP :-D

  32. 32
    gildedtumbril says:

    Tossers jogging.

  33. 33
    concrete pump says:

    You weren’t brought up, your just a heuristic maxim.

  34. 34
    Owen Jones says:

    That’s a lie, you racist.

  35. 35
    Anonymous says:


    Ashton, Van Rumpoy, Barroso, Juncker, all keeping their heads down, hoping the shit storm the have created will go away.

    What’s Frau Merkel going to do to resolve this dreadfull situation, apart from praying the gas is not turned off !

  36. 36
    Tachybaptus says:

    While it would be lovely to see both of them lose, it’s not really a realistic prospect.

  37. 37
    Mr Galloway says:

    It’s awkward for Owen Jones having to check whether the dead child is from Gaza or Syria before deciding to be morally outraged.

  38. 38
    MSM4 says:

    Which makes them hard to beat.

  39. 39
    MSM4 says:

    Start building the Shard in a Tel Aviv suburb, go on!

  40. 40
    40p? Why do you want 30p etc says:

    And you keep your settlements, yes that would be your version of fair

  41. 41
    Genghiz the kahn says:

    Running in, please pass.

  42. 42
    Just enough time for a bacon sarnie says:

  43. 43
    #costofliving says:

    FFS. He bored the leader of the free world with the cost of living crisis?

  44. 44
    And he saw the lawn says:

  45. 45
    Engineer says:

    Buy some off the Yanks. They’ve got plenty at the moment.

  46. 46
    And then it was over says:

  47. 47
    Best of Pals. Barry and Ed says:

  48. 48
    Best of Pals. says:

  49. 49
    Barry makes Ed wait while he chats with the dog says:

  50. 50
    Anonymous says:

    I told you we should have used the tradesman’s entrance at the back.

  51. 51
    Minnie Lividword II says:

    Another message for Dave to analyse (7,2,5)

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    Across :
    1. Empire-builder who aims to come fourth ? (6)
    6. Itchy pores can reveal Socialist speakers. (10)
    8. Politicians saying they can, for example ? (4)
    12. Caused by stress of arranging HS2 travel ? (6)
    13. Like the Nanny State ! (11)
    15. Colours we heard you’d like your chops. (4)
    16. Where intent Indian holds Balls steady and has a slash at him ? (6)
    18. Clarence might invite you to join him in one last large one. (3)
    19. Hanging out with Maggie ? (3)
    20. We’re not all in together. (6)
    21. Feathered serpent ? Don’t tell Ned or he’ll send one to all the middle classes ! (3)
    23. A tricky one might rope Dave into giving away our money. (6)
    25. His sketches take the gloss off government policies. (4)
    27. Young spinner ? (4)
    28. Short politico back with a twitch and all at sea. (6)
    30. If Owen were to sit on one we’d not be able to hear him. (3)
    32. Teased – about protective measures ? (6)
    34. His right one might help give a Dutchman courage. (3)
    35. Arab’s sticky route to stable food supply ? (3)
    36. You might clean behind where this popular culture is found. (6)
    38. Bet it’s a boundless wildebeest, for instance. (4)
    41. Unlikely virtue for those whose inner Socialist shows through. (11)
    43. Gordon flogged our shiny ones for SFA. (6)
    44. Another fine one for the 5 Downers, Stanley. (4)
    46. They may be illegal but the Kenyan president welcomes them. (10)
    47. They enjoy being in tight holes – Dave says he’ll see they’re looked into. (6)
    Down :
    1. Feel the earth-mover, little saint ? (6)
    2. Whisperer’s field ? (3)
    3. Nothing in search reveals valley. (5)
    4. Dry run for engagement – with pervy MP ? (9)
    5. Dave’s old boys nearly came from northern Europe. (8)
    7. Tommy thought the road here rather wet by the sound of it. (5)
    8. Tea Party member ? (5)
    9. You have a partly-formed idea, old chap ? (4)
    10. Arrange truce so salad can be dressed. (5)
    11. Opposing the general this month ? (7)
    14. How pleasant our land might once more be if MPs would just keep off the weed. (7)
    15. Rosemary or Thyme (there’s no mystery about it). (4)
    16. Not Gordon’s favourite tipple , surely – it would see him off ! (5)
    17. They wouldn’t touch an MP with a bargepole – better to suffer with dodgy knees, they say. (6)
    22. For the application of strategically-placed slipperiness. (6)
    24. Banking geezer who could really cut it ? (7)
    26. The appearance of many a Socialist hag playing a large fiddle. (5)
    27. Number ten might bring them to an en – but a major clear-out is still required. (7)
    29. Painful problems soon result from Balls support ahead of arranged nights. (9)
    31. Makes it painful to watch – the pigs at home ? (4)
    33. A new one imported from the US in its entirety ? (4-4)
    35. High-five the bomber you said was your sworn enemy, perhaps. (5)
    37. Audience response to a thousand fork-tongued politicians ? (5)
    38. Hearing whether the books balance ? (5)
    39. There’ll be only one of these for Dave.
    40. Determine – whether the idiot is female ? (6)
    42. Decorate old medic without the shouting. (5)
    45. Everyday activity in Westminster – that’s original ! (3)

  52. 52
    Ockham's Razor says:

    A fellow called Charles Sanders Peirce*
    Said semiotics could make life more terse,
    Whilst epistemic induction,
    Along with Bayesian conjunction,
    Are wrecking the scansion of verse.

    * N. B. Peirce inexplicably pronounced his name as in ‘purse’.

  53. 53
    Dianne Abbott says:

    Write your own lines little boy!

  54. 54
    Anonymous says:

    going in at 7.55, leaving at 8.22 = 27 min less hanging about time, so Hi Mr President – Goodbye Mr President……….

  55. 55
    Genghiz the kahn says:

    Microphoney Miliband.

  56. 56
    Douglas Adams says:

    I recommend regular exercise at the gym. What could possibly go wrong ?



  57. 57
    Stu says:

    Roads where you live already smell like shit so no need.

  58. 58
    giant gonad says:

    Crosby is a prize bell end.

  59. 59
    Herschel Shmoikel Pinchas Yerucham Krustofsky says:

    The bastards are out to kill me…

  60. 60
    Yeesh, my life says:

    Peace is its own reward isnt it? The price of peace is laying down weapons and embracing peaceful dialogue isnt it?

    Aaah but when peace is within reach the ones filled with hate always find excuses not to grab it dont they? Always ready with some excuse or other about some imagined injustice.

    In fact strip away the holier than thou give peace a chance blather and you find a seething hate filled violence bubbling up from the dark places in their souls, its never been about peace, its about weakening and then destroying Israel.

  61. 61
    Stu says:

    So in your version of fair, Israel gives settlements up.

    How about this version of fair you useless cock. Hamas stops firing rockets into Israel then everyone is happy.

  62. 62
    Mehdi Hasan says:

    I despise no one more than those who attempt to “Islamize” the Israel-Palestine issue. You are partly responsible for the hatred, Owen Jones.

  63. 63
    Banana Republic says:

    bent boundaries and postal voting is more influential for them

  64. 64
    Moussa Koussa says:

    How can any Prime Minister who wanted to win the next General Election have not sacked Ian Smith and Vince Cable?

    Does Cameron not think that the public will remember the Universal Credit / ATOS / DWP / Royal Mail fiascos?

  65. 65
    LOL says:

  66. 66
    LOL says:

  67. 67
    concrete pump says:

    Hold on a minute, that’s just a queue of fucking plebs.

    Oh, I get it, those people in the background are the other competition winners.

  68. 68
    F##k the LibLabCon says:

    Nick Griffin steps down as party leader.

  69. 69
    Episiotomy - how scientific theories are born says:

    Semolina must be full of semiotics since eating it can reshape your whole future.

  70. 70
  71. 71

    Dr K’en L’ivingstone I presume:

    Subtitles do not help the music, but do identify this as having something to do with K’en.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  72. 72
    Jimmy says:

    The Alternative Tory Party?

  73. 73
    Blue Peter Goldfish says:

    How would he cope with Southern style barbecued pork ribs?.

  74. 74
    Too Many Tits Spoil The Broth says:

  75. 75

    Indy isn’t:

    Vote UKIP :-D

  76. 76
    Left left their's nothing left says:

    Alternative Liebour party Jimmy, after all it’s more left than the Liebour party has been since Wilson.

  77. 77
    Lord Irvine says:

    Please do not breath on the wallpaper.

  78. 78
    Mr. Ed says:

    He kept asking me how well I was doing at International Rescue.

  79. 79

    Wassup ?

    Erm – check the avatar / moniker – That has a good name ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  80. 80
    Tiny Tadger says:

    Remember kids, it’s not the size of your pen that counts but the style of your signature.

  81. 81
    Kinky Pickering says:

    Rhubarb is the devil’s celery.

  82. 82
    In your dreams BW says:

    Caught you! You are a thick twat BW! OR ran me to the airport at Ronchi dei Legionari today, better known as Aeroporto Friuli Venezia Giulia. We left before 6:00 am your time and I hear he did not get back until gone lunchtime, as he had business in Trieste.

    Like everything else you write, it springs from your troubled mind rather than any basis of fact. Do one, spaz!

  83. 83
    Esther McVey says:

    They told me Cameron would look really sexy after 10 or 11 pints but I’ve bought him 15 already this evening and he’s downed them all and he looks worse than ever. It’s not working.

  84. 84
    Derek the Dolphin says:

    The pig farmer is always welcome at my parties

  85. 85

    You are having a Nuland moment.

    But on your more important point, !srael will need to recognize that P’alestine is a State, but missiles being fired out of P’alestine is not going to help.

    There are two important dots missing from the picture: R’uss!a and !ran.

    It’s covered a little in this + See links / Google ‘G’aza !srael R’ussia !ran’ and you should get the FP articles:

    Vote UKIP :-D

  86. 86
    this sporting life says:

    Give them a twenty minute start then set the dogs on them.

  87. 87
    Dr. clarence Gobb says:

    Wank, wank. tiddly piss, scrotum and knackers.

  88. 88


    Vote UKIP :-D

  89. 89
    Lord Tonypansie says:

    Makes more sense than Bercow ever has.

  90. 90

    If you want to get on the wrong side of a tragedy like this then be my guest. But it will do you no favours.

    It’s worth a careful watch.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  91. 91
    Pig Farmer says:

    I await my invite.

  92. 92
    Anonymous says:

    We’re talking about the British public here mate, who already seem to have forgotten that Labour put us into trillions of pounds of debt, so I very much doubt if they’ll remember what you’ve listed, you fucking berk.

  93. 93
    Nicki says:

    Thank you Mr Gone

  94. 94
    Abdull the Idiot Muzz says:

    Only two dinar per vote, sahib.

  95. 95
    The One Viewer Show says:

    Or a half brained sheep shagger from Wales or the North

  96. 96
    Pissed As A Cunt says:

    How long is it to Tipperary exactly? And is Jesus really the Son of God?

  97. 97


    Keep on running, running from my arms
    One fine day, I’m gonna be the one
    To make you understand
    Oh yeah, I’m gonna be your man

    Hey, hey, hey
    Everyone is talking about me
    It makes me feel so sad
    Hey, hey, hey
    Everyone is laughing at me
    It makes me feel so sad
    So keep on running

    Read more: Spencer Davis Group – Keep On Running Lyrics | MetroLyrics

  98. 98
  99. 99
  100. 100
    Guido Translate says:

    English: National Socialist German Workers’ Party
    German: Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiterpartei


    The clue is in the name Jimmy.

  101. 101

    Oops – that was the last embargo Sky broke last year.

  102. 102
    Silent Bob says:


  103. 103
  104. 104
    concrete pump says:

    Ceteris paribus.

    Did I get it..?

  105. 105

    Why is the S’un not forwarding properly to H’enderson ?

    The S’un – brought to you by what looks like a picture of a spreadsheet ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  106. 106
    Left left their's nothing left says:

    ATOS is the most hated, even if you were dying they marked you fit for worked, if you turned up in a wheelchair you were fit for work, if you have arthritis and used canes to walk you are fit for work, ATOS WILL keep Camorons Conservatives out of number 10 after May 2015, they are fkin hated by people because ill or not you were fit for work, no second chance, no hope, you lose,so will the Conservatives.

  107. 107
    Oby says:

    “Hillary, thought you told me this guy’s jooish? Is this the dork you fancied? He’s eating bacon ffs”

  108. 108
    History Repeats Itself says:

    “Hey Ed! – you want some ketchup on that?”

  109. 109
    Blue Peter Goldfish says:

    Chocolate is Satan’s shite.

  110. 110
    JadedJean666 says:

    The Sun, reflecting its owner Murdoch’s (whose mother was a J*w btw) views is a Zi*nist propagandist. Surprise, surprise!

    What else did you expect?

  111. 111
    concrete pump says:

    Is the nurse not answering the buzzer, you tedious fucking div..?

  112. 112
    Moses says:

    I knew we’d have problems with those bacon butties. I tried to ban them but Ed thought he knew better.

  113. 113
    non taxable pikey says:

    Better still buy some from Israel, they have a monster gas field offshore Haifa, called Leviathan. Pipeline from that to Aphrodite field offshore Cyprus and then up to Greece and into Europe. Enough gas to keep Western Europe going for 50 years, so far. That’ll put RatsPukin’s nose out of joint.

  114. 114
    Blue Peter Goldfish says:

    The loneliness of the long distance bummer.

  115. 115

    I do not see what that has to do with ‘Rupe’.

    The reporter in question has been suspended, and this case perhaps raises interesting questions in relation to previous cases which M’ahmood has testified in.

    More a headache for the CPS than anything else, who themselves should be reviewing this case with a view to bringing charges against M’ahmood.

    From what I see, trial was rightly ended but this is only a pyrrhic victory for T’ulisa and the guilty-pleading rapper guy. She deserves to have her life ruined – teach her not to get caught if she dabbles in illegal stuff again and to perhaps start behaving like an adult and stop being a silly girl.

    Next time she’ll go down for sure.

    Good question: Why did M’ahmood go after her ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  116. 116
    We are all the same person here... says:

    Yes. You have it, BW. We are all part of the mind of Bill Quango MP, aka jgm2, aka Engineer, aka Sir William Waad, aka Mr Ned, aka Lividword, aka Tachybaptus, aka Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur, aka Tuscan Tony, aka nell, aka concrete pump, aka Dich Scratcher, aka Silent Bob, aka The Paragnostic, aka Grumpy old man, aka Gooey Blob, aka Lou Scannon, aka Mornington Crescent, aka Bosun Higgs, aka Mr Slater’s parrot, aka Unsworth, aka Gone Fuckin mental, aka AC1, aka Tulkinghorn, aka Tim Yeo-yo, aka Fred the pensioner, aka Universal Hiss, aka the mystic mould with the appearance of the face of Jesus, aka Calamity Clegg, Chief Cockroach, aka Casual Observer, aka Jimmy, aka Blue Peter Goldfish, aka RomaBob, aka Fishy, aka Expat Geordie, aka Ellie-Mae (9), aka SIZE 15 CARBON FOOTPRINT, aka MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD and CODFATHER of SOUL, aka Genghiz the kahn, aka Idon’tneednodoctor, aka broderick crawford, aka Jabba Le Chat, aka Bert, aka Mine d’Boggles, aka C.O.Jones, aka Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons, aka Village Idiot, aka The Growler, aka Hugh Janus, aka Socialism is theft, aka albacore, aka non taxable pikey, aka Ah! Monica, aka Another Engineer, aka Mr Helpful, aka Anonymous, aka Not Blowing Whistles, aka Old Nick Heavenly, aka The Beast of Clerkenwell, aka Bloomers in rain-soaked Bongo Bongo Land, aka Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin ( Member in absentia ), aka smoggie, aka Kebab Time, aka CYNICAL OLD MAN, aka illogical, aka Hannibal from Carthage, aka Yvonne from The Colliers Arms Clydach, but not including Moussa Koussa nor TaT.

    As was are all the same person, we are doing our very best not to make you neurotic but afraid we are failing dismally from the evidence. Still that Value range of tin foil at Tescos has not run out yet so suggest you head on down there quickly on your rocking horse…

  117. 117
    WTF? says:

    So GTF out of Palestine and back too Kazakhstan where your real roots are, you conniving Slimebag.

  118. 118
    Hi...my name's Tulisa says:

  119. 119
    Geedo's Bank Holiday says:

  120. 120
    Miles Kington says:

    For the benefit of BW:

    Latin Phrase Book
    Caeteris paribus: restaurant facilities are available on the Paris coach

    Compiled in response to the Vatican’s support for Latin as the European language.

  121. 121
    Casual observer says:

    Change the last word and you could be talking about the other side

  122. 122
    When Barry met Mili says:

    Nice to meet you David.

  123. 123
    The Whitehouse says:

    Err, Mr Miliband, it wasn’t Your meeting.

  124. 124

    There are two breeds of Z’ionist.

    Where is M ? :-)

    R’ussia could have handled this situation a lot better. For instance: Not training and handing those weapon systems over to their terrorist militia’s in U’kraine would have been a good start.

    Something that hasn’t been reported too much is that the U’krainians themselves were quite deeply moved and upset by this incident, and by R’ussia’s dis-respectful handling of the dead. Has brought back quite a few collective bad memories.

    It is clear where the people of U’kraine stand.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  125. 125
    Future PM says:

    Good god, seriously, they queued up to say hello and walk on out the door?

  126. 126
    Tt's rude not to shake the extended hand says:

    Is Ed refusing to shake hand with PotUS or is he just scared of him?

  127. 127
    Enjoy the diversity says:

    Pupils at just ONE junior school speak a staggering 58 different languages.

  128. 128
    Arthur Negus says:

    Couldn’t they have found a bigger fucking table?

  129. 129
    A plastic carrier bag? says:

  130. 130
    Future PM says:

    Fuck me, it’s just so pathetic.

  131. 131
    Bumservative Partaaay says:

    Yeah, but they all know what DSS stands for.

  132. 132
    Left left their's nothing left says:

    Prefer to wait until they make Guy Fawkes a public holiday in Saudi Arabia.

  133. 133
    Bumservative Partaaay says:

    That Liz Truss gets everywhere.

  134. 134
    Gordon used to gnaw his nails says:

  135. 135
    concrete pump says:

    Milliband wondering if the myth is true.

  136. 136
    I likes it says:

    A very good point.

  137. 137
    Bastards says:

    Let’s hope the Irish Congress of Trade Unions condemn the attack in the Belfast synagogue tonight……windows smashed.
    Maybe it was some of their sectarian IRA brothers in arms who they shared a platform rally for Hamas with who were responsible.

  138. 138
    abdul says:

    Friday should be part of weekend too. It’s racist and unfair at the moment.

  139. 139
    Charles Sanders Peirce says:

    Our family name was originally spelled Pers, thus bringing about the pronunciation.

    It was then tidied up into the present style but the pronunciation remained unchanged.

    HTH. May I now go back, undisturbed, to my grave please?

  140. 140
    Out Think says:

    Don’t forget the BBC and Sky

  141. 141
    Fishy says:

    ‘I’m going to be a post Iraq Prime Minister,’ Weird Ed said….’I can lead in Washington as well as Number 10.’

    What a fucking big headed nutjob the twat is.

  142. 142
    Cosmo Smallpiece says:

    Knickers, knockers, knackers.

  143. 143
    concrete pump says:

    Got a link to the proper stats.?

  144. 144
    Chuka aka Obama's stunt double says:

  145. 145
    Pissed As A Cunt says:

    I wish my mouth was as big as that.

  146. 146

    Question for Dave: Or what ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  147. 147
    PCR says:

    How American propaganda works.

    Why hasn’t Washington joined Russian President Putin in calling for an objective, non-politicized international investigation by experts of the case of the Malaysian jetliner?

    The Russian government continues to release facts, including satellite photos showing the presence of Ukrainian Buk anti-aircraft missiles in locations from which the airliner could have been brought down by the missile system and documentation that a Ukrainian SU-25 fighter jet rapidly approached the Malaysian airliner prior to its downing. The head of the Operations Directorate of Russian military headquarters said at a Moscow press conference today (July 21) that the presence of the Ukrainian military jet is confirmed by the Rostov monitoring center.

    The Russian Defense Ministry pointed out that at the moment of destruction of MH-17 an American satellite was flying over the area. The Russian government urges Washington to make available the photos and data captured by the satellite.

    President Putin has repeatedly stressed that the investigation of MH-17 requires “a fully representative group of experts to be working at the site under the guidance of the International Civil Aviation Organization (ICAO).” Putin’s call for an independent expert examination by ICAO does not sound like a person with anything to hide.

  148. 148
    PCR says:

    Turning to Washington Putin stated: “In the meantime, no one [not even the “exceptional nation”] has the right to use this tragedy to achieve their narrowly selfish political goals.”

    Putin reminded Washington: “We repeatedly called upon all conflicting sides to stop the bloodshed immediately and to sit down at the negotiating table. I can say with confidence that if military operations were not resumed [by Kiev] on June 28 in eastern Ukraine, this tragedy wouldn’t have happened.”

    What is the American response?

    Lies and insinuations.

    Yesterday (July 20) the US Secretary of State, John Kerry confirmed that pro-Russian separatists were involved in the downing of the Malaysian airliner and said that it was “pretty clear” that Russia was involved. Here are Kerry’s words: “It’s pretty clear that this is a system that was transferred from Russia into the hands of separatists. We know with confidence, with confidence, that the Ukrainians did not have such a system anywhere near the vicinity at that point and time, so it obviously points a very clear finger at the separatists.”

  149. 149
    PCR says:

    Kerry’s statement is just another of the endless lies told by US secretaries of state in the 21st century. Who can forget Colin Powell’s package of lies delivered to the UN about Saddam Hussein’s “weapons of mass destruction” or Kerry’s lie repeated endlessly that Assad “used chemical weapons against his own people” or the endless lies about “Iranian nukes”?

    Remember that Kerry on a number of occasions stated that the US had proof that Assad crossed the “red line” by using chemical weapons. However, Kerry was never able to back up his statements with evidence. The US had no evidence to give the British prime minister whose effort to have Parliament approve Britain’s participation with Washington in a military attack on Syria was voted down. Parliament told the prime minister, “no evidence, no war.”

    Again here is Kerry declaring “confidence” in statements that are directly contradicted by the Russian satellite photos and endless eye witnesses on the ground.

    Why doesn’t Washington release its photos from its satellite?

  150. 150
    PCR says:

    The answer is for the same reason that Washington will not release all the videos it confiscated and that it claims prove that a hijacked 9/11 airliner hit the Pentagon. The videos do not support Washington’s claim, and the US satellite photos do not support Kerry’s claim.

    The UN weapons inspectors on the ground in Iraq reported that Iraq had no weapons of mass destruction. However, the fact did not support Washington’s propaganda and was ignored. Washington started a highly destructive war based on nothing but Washington’s intentional lie.

    The International Atomic Energy Commission’s inspectors on the ground in Iran and all 16 US intelligence agencies reported that Iran had no nuclear weapons program. However, the fact was inconsistent with Washington’s agenda and was ignored by both the US government and the presstitute media.

    We are witnessing the same thing right now with the assertions in the absence of evidence that Russia is responsible for the downing of the Malaysian airliner.

    Not every member of the US government is as reckless as Kerry and John McCain. In place of direct lies, many US officials use insinuations.

  151. 151
    Left left their's nothing left says:

    Ed up before the head teacher?, what’s he done to be sent to the head for, the Kenyan looks peeved with him, must’ve been late loads of times.

  152. 152
    PCR says:

    US Senator Diane Feinstein is the perfect example. Interviewed on the presstitute TV station CNN, Feinstein said: “The issue is where is Putin? I would say, ‘Putin, you have to man up. You should talk to the world. You should say, if this is a mistake, which I hope it was, say it.’”

    Putin has been talking to the world nonstop calling for an expert non-politicized investigation, and Feinstein is asking Putin why he is hiding behind silence. We know you did it, Feinstein insinuates, so just tell us whether you meant to or whether it was an accident.

    The way the entire Western news cycle was orchestrated with blame instantly being placed on Russia long in advance of real information suggests that the downing of the airliner was a Washington operation. It is, of course, possible that the well-trained presstitute media needed no orchestration from Washington in order to lay the blame on Russia. On the other hand, some of the news performances seem too scripted not to have been prepared in advance.

    We also have the advanced preparation of the youtube video that purports to show a Russian general and Ukrainian separatists discussing having mistakenly downed a civilian airliner. As I pointed out earlier, this video is twice damned. It was ready in advance and by implicating the Russian military, it overlooked that the Russian military can tell the difference between a civilian airliner and a military airplane. The existence of the video itself implies that there was a plot to down the airliner and blame Russia.

  153. 153
    PCR says:

    I have seen reports that the Russian anti-aircraft missile system, as a safety device, is capable of contacting aircraft transponders in order to verify the type of aircraft. If the reports are correct and if the transponders from MH-17 are found, they might record the contact.

    I have seen reports that Ukrainian air control changed the route of MH-17 and directed it to fly over the conflict area. The transponders should also indicate whether this is correct. If so, there clearly is at least circumstantial evidence that this was an intentional act on the part of Kiev, an act which would have required Washington’s blessing.

    There are other reports that there is a divergence between the Ukrainian military and the unofficial militias formed by the right-wing Ukrainian extremists who apparently were the first to attack the separatists. It is possible that Washington used the extremists to plot the airliner’s destruction in order to blame Russia and use the accusations to pressure the EU to go along with Washington’s unilateral sanctions against Russia. We do know that Washington is desperate to break up the growing economic and political ties between Russia and Europe.

  154. 154
    PCR says:

    If it was a plot to down an airliner, any safety device on the missile system could have been turned off so as to give no warning or leave any telltale sign. That could be the reason a Ukrainian fighter was sent to inspect the airliner. Possibly the real target was Putin’s airliner and incompetence in implementing the plot resulted in the destruction of a civilian airliner.

    As there are a number of possible explanations, let’s keep open minds and resist Washington’s propaganda until facts and evidence are in. In the very least Washington is guilty of using the incident to blame Russia in advance of the evidence. All Washington has shown us so far are accusations and insinuations. If that is all Washington continues to show us, we will know where the blame resides.

    In the meantime, remember the story of the boy who cried “wolf!” He lied so many times that when the wolf did come, no one believed him. Will this be Washington’s ultimate fate?

    Instead of declaring war on Iraq, Afghanistan, Libya, Somalia, and Syria, why did Washington hide behind lies? If Washington wants war with Iran, Russia, and China, why not simply declare war? The reason that the US Constitution requires war to begin with a declaration of war by Congress is to prevent the executive branch from orchestrating wars in order to further hidden agendas. By abdicating its constitutional responsibility, the US Congress is complicit in the executive branch’s war crimes. By approving Israel’s premeditated murder of Palestinians, the US government is complicit in Israel’s war crimes.

  155. 155
    Has Ed forgotten his roots? says:

  156. 156
    Pissed As A Cunt says:

    Whizz, bang, whoosh, pop. crack. Ich kann nicht vergessen.

  157. 157
    Left left their's nothing left says:

    Go and live in the Middle East, Jeddah is nice this time of the year, Friday is the weekend and Saturday is the start of the week, business is business.

  158. 158
    PCR says:

    Ask yourself this question: Would the world be a safer place with less death, destruction and displaced peoples and more truth and justice if the United States and Israel did not exist?


  159. 159
    Left left their's nothing left says:

    modded :-(

  160. 160

    J’abba’s got a Twitter account as well.

    Just sayin’

    Have seen him tweet whilst others have been posting here.

    Guess in BW’s world that makes J’abba a clever dick ?

    (Apologies J’abba)

    Vote UKIP :-D

  161. 161
    concrete pump says:

    (Yawn x 3).

  162. 162
    But Ed said he was a Z10nist says:

  163. 163
    Danny La Rue says:

    Number 72

  164. 164
    We are all the same person here... says:

    Nighty night, petal. Sleep well.


  165. 165

    News beat:

    Vote UKIP :-D

  166. 166

    If you can hear the sound of R’ussian laughter:

    Note to Dave: Honey Badger Don’t Care.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  167. 167
    We are all the same person here... says:

    To conflate something, one broadens it?

    That BW fellow needs help. He is seriously impaired.

  168. 168
    MSM Lickspittles says:

    Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala we’re not listening lalalalalalalalalalala…………………

  169. 169
    MSM Lickspittles says:

    Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala we’re not listening lalalalalalalalalalala……………

  170. 170
    BBC Thought Police says:


  171. 171

    Indy is owned by L’ebedev = P’utin.

    It’s an interesting agitprop platform, but is simply a K’remlin propaganda organ.

    Same deal with the i.

    The owners may work double, but they know that if they stray too far from M’oscow they will wind up drinking P’olonium M’artinis.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  172. 172
    Miles Kington says:

    For the benefit of BW:

    Latin Phrase Book

    Sic transit gloria mundi: the nausea will pass away, and you’ll be fine by Monday

  173. 173

    He apparently was giving evidence in open court before a judge. That would have to be under oath.

    CPS will likely need to review all cases before proceeding against him – it could be messy and they will need to get it right.

    M’ahmood has not been convicted of anything yet, or indeed charged, but if the allegation is right (highly likely given what has just happened with two other cases dependent on his evidence) then charges should be coming soon. At the least he should perhaps be arrested and bailed in order to make it harder for him to vacate the country unless the delay is in the hope that that happens in order to hush up other things that may come out in his trial.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  174. 174
    Smell the coffee says:

    (awakening x 6).

  175. 175

    It could suggest that the guy in question has been coerced into doing something or surrendering something so was let off the hook.

    The sentencing can always be appealed successfully at a later date if the individual steps out of line.

    Vote UKIP :-)

  176. 176
    Left left their's nothing left says:

    NO, the wheelchair and the canes are genuine people and the dying one is here-say from the canes, that one was smashed up in a bike crash, the person had doctors notes and and was at a physio and has arthritis, the doctor wouldn’t release him for work , he was pronounced fit by ATOS, he lost benefits, he still gets doctors notes and sees a physio and wants to work but the doctor says he has no chance, one less Conservative voter, his cronies who he see’s at the clinics are spitting vile at the Conservatives and will vote Liebour 2015 even though they know they are crap..

  177. 177

    Am only really concerned with the current editorial and ownership of a UK publication.

    They seem quite keen on pushing provokatsiya aimed at E’urope on D’ave’s behalf: That is not in anyone’s interest.

    Their whole coverage of MH17 has been ‘peculiar’.

    Would be good to see that family out of L’ondon permanently. They may be working double, but they are not to be trusted.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  178. 178
    Ed Watch says:

    No, he’s just confused. Whispered to his aides : “He’s put out his hand. What do I do? What do I do?”

  179. 179
    Victoria Nuland and Ann Applebaum says:

    Your ‘certainties’, ET, may be enough to bind your own anxieties but in reality they are not certain at all. A US satellite was over the area when MH17 was shot down; why don’t they offer evidence to counter the Russians’?

    It is looking more and more likely that a Kiev unit (possibly rogue) brought down the airliner in a false flag, as their fores were hurting badly in the East. The US probably knew this almost immediately, panicked and went into full spin mode without having time to smooth out the rough edges, knowing that if unchecked, a story about Kiev killing civilians would derail their entire EU strategy.

    I suspect that China has seen a more detailed dossier, which is why they have come out so openly for Moscow. Some of the key non-aligned nations appear to be moving in the same direction. Will Obama fold, as in Syria, or go all-in? We risk a chaotic descent into madness, as in August 1914.

  180. 180
    concrete pump says:

    There she is.

  181. 181
    Another Engineer says:



  182. 182
    concrete pump says:

    You don’t seem to understand.

    I don’t believe in god.

    If nutjobs want to kill each other over religion that’s absolutely fucking fine with me.

  183. 183
    Say no to tinfoil says:


  184. 184
    Jesus says:

    I’d love to shove my circumcised clock in BW’s tight goy bumhole!

  185. 185
    Victoria Nuland and Ann Applebaum says:

    Maybe that’s because the Europeans are not yet convinced by the Kiev/White House case. Neither are the Chinese. Neither are many Americans. Neither am I.

    Why are you so keen on punishing Putin before the court has even sat? If you were confident of your facts you would show them, call for an independent inquiry and wait for a verdict based as far as possible on the facts. This is what Russia appears to be doing.

  186. 186
    Bloomers in rain-soaked Bongo Bongo Land says:

    Don’t be daft.

  187. 187
    Fishy says:

    He’s been working on these posts all day.

    He’ll be telling us next that it was King George’s men who threw the tea into the harbour in Boston as a false flag operation to isolate the would be separatists and wipe them out before the US War of Independence could start. George Bush the first had other ideas however and was able to call on the armies of Genghis Khan the rest is history.

    Actually what PCR doesn’t know in his bunker in Kensington Palace Gardens was that (he probably does actually) was that the attack was carried out a day late, after the Buk missile launcher developed a fault and technicians hurried across the border from Russia to repair it. While Russian aircraft were overflying Kiev and the Government held West Ukraine where the Ukranians had SAM missiles, they were skirting separatist held east Ukraine, north / south flights taking an avoiding route, where the Ukrainian government didn’t have SAM equipment.

    Inter continental east / west traffic was continuing to overfly the area as normal. It was only later in the day that Aeroflot and other carriers ventured into east Ukraine airspace – one particular Aeroflot flight, performing a remarkable 360 degree turn at 33,400 feet, after initially diverting east, continuing to turn full circle and then continuing north in a straight line to Moscow over the disputed, volatile territory. Clearly the suggestion is that it had got word that it was safe to fly – there would be no attack after all.

  188. 188


    E’uropean and A’merican authorities are very carefully managing public opinion. They do not want P’utin’s provokatsiya to coerce their public to demand confrontation, or to subvert their peoples belief in their own governments.

    This is a profoundly dangerous and nasty game which is being played, which is why P’utin deserves a bit of stick. That and his being partly responsible for the murder of ~300 people who were on board MH17 last week.

    One needs to think like a C’heka to understand P’utin’s motivations and actions now. This is damage limitation R’ussian style. Messy – isn’t it ?

    It is not possible to make statements credibly about people being convinced one way or the other unless you have some polling figures to back you up. It is an irrelevant question to ask people though as it happened.

    P’utin (through his supported separatist outfits) did not do the right thing by leaving the site un-secure, or ensuring that the bodies were sorted out with priority. That would be so as they could be returned in as fit a state as possible to relatives.

    Instead of covering himself on the phone (as reported) P’utin could have picked up the phone immediately to U’kraine and offered unconditional cessation of support for separatists and resources (not people – hardware and maybe access to R’ussian medical facilities for storing bodies) for dealing with the crash.

    He could have even attempted to visit the crash site to pay his respects. He would be secure there.

    That would have communicated a very different message.

    I consider the R’ussian State to be a bigger and more murderous analogue of the L’abour government that the UK was stuck with 1997 through 2010. That is a fatuous comparison as I the R’ussian State is really incomparable to even the worst excesses in the UK.

    NB: Mass murder of innocent civilians and desecration of the dead does not appear to be advocated by the R’ussian O’rthodox C’hurch anywhere.

    Neither is trying to cover up such events if they do somehow happen.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  189. 189
    No to Sharia and all Totalitarianism says:

    Ask the Tibetans, the Chechens and the Christians in Mosul, I would suggest.

  190. 190
    Confused says:

    Kids nowadays are so clever.

  191. 191

    It is perhaps time to review what really happened in the S’molensk crash of 2010:

    M’oscow still has the black boxes.

    Could they have ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  192. 192
    Jimmy says:

    So long as he didn’t get called a lightweight I reckon he’s ahead there.

  193. 193

    “A party which, until I took it over, had only ever held a single council seat for a few months, is now on course to have had unbroken elected presence in British politics for 17 years,”

    [fatty griffin, retiring leader of the modbot party, redefines the phrase “glass half full”]

  194. 194
    Why Me? says:

    There’s something dodgy going on.

  195. 195
    Why Me? says:

    Vote UZIP!

  196. 196
    Pissed As A Scunt says:

  197. 197
    Ed is not cut out to be a senior politlcian says:

  198. 198

    Vote UKIP :-D

  199. 199
    The cream says:

    I dread to think what the photos they didn’t publish look like.

  200. 200
    EU Funded Pro EU Trolls never sleep says:

    Are there more than one EU Funded Pro EU Trolls? Working around the clock.

  201. 201


    – Or do we need to wait for some R’ussian shoe banging on the podium ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  202. 202
    albacore says:

    Comrade Dave has a trainer? That explains a lot
    Even with the innate Blairite talent he’s got
    Without intensive coaching he couldn’t hardly
    Have made E U lap dogs of a “Tory” party

  203. 203
    Salma Hayek says:

    That’s what I love about you, Bob, you’re always so dogmatic.

  204. 204
    Blowing Willies says:

    ….meanwhile back on Planet Earth.

  205. 205
    Blowing Willies says:

    BW you just been served!

  206. 206
    Blowing Willies says:

    Any idea why Israel isn’t bombing the West Bank?

  207. 207
    Blowing Willies says:

    Reeks of disinformation.

  208. 208
    Blowing Willies says:

    The only difference is that one form of socialism hates Je­ws.

  209. 209
    Blowing Willies says:

    Manny Shinwell, former MP for Easington in England?

  210. 210
    Obama Beach says:

    “So you’re the daft cu­nt to fucked up our plans to help Syria?”

  211. 211
    Obama Beach says:

    You might ask the same of Russia. is there anything that Russia exports that does not burn or explode?

  212. 212
    Duty pedant says:


  213. 213
    NWO Socialists are human filth says:

    There’s an army of the little socialist insects, tolling away with their greasy little hands taking the masters Euro coin, all using this EU FUNDED PRO EU TROLL monika, adding the disingenuous ‘Vote UKIP’ at the bottom.

    They have to know that many the de aths in the Ukraine reflect on them as much as anyone, the traitorous little shits.

  214. 214
    UKIP for Great Britian says:

    Just wait till the Bbbc photo shop team get to work on them, you’d think it was ‘Bumma’s team that were struggling.

  215. 215
    The world has gone mad! says:

    NHS limits IVF to HIV positive men and cancer patients.


  216. 216
    M­a­­q­b­o­­ul says:

    One eyed twat steps down from leadership of extreme political party. Nation rejoices.

    Why am I getting a feeling of deja vu?

  217. 217
    Begone Cameron - you can run but you can't hide your true nature any longer says:

    Trainers mostly come in pairs
    But only one was ‘neath Dave’s stairs;
    Hence the need to Photoshop it,
    Else Dave would’ve had to hop it.

  218. 218
    Quod erat demonstrandum says:

    No, no Miles! Sic transit gloria mundi means Gloria was unwell in the van last Monday.

    You must also remember that, feeling hungry, Caesar adsum jam forte, after which he felt so much better.

    There fixed for you.

  219. 219
    Owen Jones says:

    A dutch businessman and a stewardess are both in the papers telling how they didn’t board the doomed Malaysian flights.

    That’s really spooky. I didn’t either

  220. 220
    albacore says:

    I can’t figure how safely to post pictures on here
    Else a bit of Photoshopping would make pretty clear
    That the Parliament we’ve got is composed of pure ****s
    And wouldn’t need thousands of Fawkes’s forbidden words

  221. 221
    Edward Snowden, The Guardian's hero and living in Russia says:

    Pity the BBC don’t have characters like that these days – at least he wasn’t a fucking beeboid.

  222. 222
    Edward Snowden, The Guardian's hero and living in Russia says:

    The rest of us will be proscribed a course of assisted dying.

  223. 223
    Anonymous says:

    Stephen Hawking works and he’s in a wheelchair.

  224. 224
    Edward Snowden, The Guardian's hero and living in Russia says:

    prescribed even – it’s hell living in Putin’s Russia.

  225. 225
    Bluto says:

    Too funny!

  226. 226
    Rightie says:

    Oh no! Grick Niffin has stood down! Who will be our leader now?

  227. 227
    Reject says:

    Clearly built the wrong way up – nose runs while feet smell.

  228. 228
    Mehdi Hasan says:

    What are crazier than Owen Jones’s tweets ? Absolutely nothing.

  229. 229
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Wheres a fucking drunk driver when you need one ?

  230. 230
    Joss Taskin says:

    You ?

  231. 231
    Sir Peter Hayman says:

    Why do my fellow righties react with terror and panic whenever it’s mentioned that I and some other Tories were kiddie fiddlers? It’s almost as if they want to maintain the facade that we’re all hetero family men.

  232. 232
    Bean_Poles says:

    The BeanPee Party was got at by extremely influential people to keep it just on the legal side of politics whilst also forcing it up a creek.
    It would be too easy to proscribe far-right organisations, but modern politics is far craftier than that. By giving supposed fruitcake parties and supporters just enough public funds to keep them going they stay out of Northern Ireland type politics, which in previous eras would have been the natural progression of desperate people with strong ideologies.
    Nice hatchet job – so far – but will they be able to stop fanatical drift in the future?

  233. 233
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Russia was a bankrupt shit hole and China wasn’t far behind , untill the western politicians decided to start making them rich by buying every piece of shite they produced
    Now we are the poor relatives and they are world super powers yet again
    Well done yet again to the brain dead politicians , who are now swamping our countries with immigrants , to enrich our countries

    Why all politicians are not smothered at birth is beyond me ?

  234. 234
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Not only can Ed not tie his own shoe laces , he cant pick the right colour tie either

  235. 235
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    And breaks for prayer 5 times a day should be compulsory
    Where as smoking breaks should be banned

  236. 236
    ED Milliband says:

    So are mine!

  237. 237
    Known says:

    I have a better idea:
    The Izzies give back all the land they thieved and compensate the Palestinians for all the crimes, disposessions, loss of earnings etc. just like the Chews got compensation for what happened to their grandparents in the Holocaust!
    Just for a start.

  238. 238
    Known says:

    There are gas fields they want to steal in the sea off Gaza.

  239. 239
    Anonymous says:

    “This one could run and run…”
    A bit like Dave promising, and then reneging, in regard to the production of tax returns? ‘Though at least one of life’s great mysteries is sol-ved. Tony B’s media interview statement, reveals that he equates wealth with worth. Well he’ll never become the light of the western world, no matter how much he might crave that, while he continues to confuse profit with prophet. p.s. If you decide you need help with a seemingly irreconcilable situation Tone, just ask.

  240. 240

    If you put that statement into a structure that could be considered making an argument or indeed point, it would be worth addressing.

    A good start may be to check through the recent archive and look carefully at the reporting and it’s tone – something fishy going on.

    Vote UKIP :-D

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Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”

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