July 18th, 2014

Friday Caption Contest (Silent But Deadly Edition)


169 Comments

  1. 1
    Havocman says:

    “Look, Ed, I only suggested you actually meet a few working class people”.

    Like

  2. 2
    Havocman says:

    Ed B’s suggestion of wife swapping with Ed M didn’t go down too well.

    Like

  3. 3
    andie99uk says:

    David, get that knob out of my face
    Sorry, Ed, but he’s your choice for chancellor

    Like

  4. 4
    BBC 24hr Rolling Bollocks says:

    Ed smelt it Harman dealt it

    Like

  5. 5
    Anonymous says:

    Miliband: “was that you or Harperson just drop one?”

    Like

  6. 6
    Ed Miliband says:

    Can I smell balls or is it his feet?

    Liked by 1 person

  7. 7
    Pedantic & Irritable Sod says:

    Did you drop that one Ed?

    Like

  8. 8
    Steve Miliband says:

    was it the Owl?

    Like

  9. 9
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:

    Ed B to Ed M:

    Have you got rotten pilchards in your pocket or has Harriet just queefed?

    Like

  10. 10
    Wah wah pedal says:

    Either Bercow’s shit himself or Hattie’s on LBC again..

    Like

  11. 11
    peter sharp says:

    Uncle Ed, please make those nasty boys and girls from the posh school up the road stop it. They’re always laughing at me!

    Like

  12. 12

    “Don’t cry. You can be Shadow Minister for Social Awkwardness when Yvette takes over.”

    Like

  13. 13
    Rab C Nesbitt says:

    Shut yer legs Harriet Doll.
    Ah hate ra smell o PIE in ra mornin.

    Like

  14. 14
    Tom says:

    Vindaloo last night was it?

    Like

  15. 15
    concrete pump says:

    Sorry Ed, that’s the bacon sandwich.

    Like

  16. 16
    Colin McLeod says:

    Fuck…. have you been on the cabbage again?

    Like

  17. 17
    Owhine Jones says:

    ‘Fancy a cheese sandwich?’

    Like

  18. 18
    Fruitcake, swivel eyed loon, closet racist, crank and gadfly says:

    We are shit.

    Like

  19. 20
  20. 21

    Ed Balls: Guess where my hands are?

    Like

  21. 22
    Whiffler says:

    “Hattie expects to be Deputy PM !?!?”

    Like

  22. 23
    NO SEATS NIGEL says:

    wish i could get a lovely green seat like that

    Like

  23. 24
  24. 25
    south7eventh says:

    ‘Don’t ever make me suck nettles before PMQs again!’

    Like

  25. 26
    Bug says:

    Fancy a bacon sandwich?

    Like

  26. 27
    Ed Miliband says:

    I was all like duh and he was like duh and I was like Duh!

    Like

  27. 28
    Tom says:

    You’re sure Hattie has been fracking methane gas? ITS true !!!

    Like

  28. 29
    Ed says:

    “What the fuck with you? I only said imagine shagging Harriet”

    Like

  29. 30
    Arse finder says:

    ed “That wasn’t me is was my arse!”
    ed “who are you calling arse – arse?”
    ed “If it looks like an arse, smells like and arse then you are an arse”

    Like

  30. 31
    Foxy says:

    Balls: “shall we bring your brother back Ed?”

    Like

  31. 32
    Fart-Ed says:

    Better out than in that’s what I say

    Like

  32. 33
    Julian The Wonderhorse says:

    The one who deficit denied it, supplied it

    Like

  33. 34
    Iain Duncan Smith says:

    Ed Balls “Fancy bumsex with Owen Jones?”

    Like

  34. 35
    Have you shit yourself? says:

    Like

  35. 36
    Kind Ed says:

    It’s all right we’ll scrag him in the playground afterwards.

    Like

  36. 37
    Surrey man in scuba gear to get to computer says:

    Christ, how long’s Gove been in there now?

    Like

  37. 38
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    Miliband: For fucks sake Ed, lay off the homemade Lasagna.

    Like

  38. 39
    Anonymous says:

    Deny it all you like Mili, but Steph definitely told me she preferred Ed’s Balls.

    Like

  39. 40
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    Too fart too fast.

    Like

  40. 41
    concrete pump says:

    Do you want to see Margaret Beckett’s holiday swimsuit photos.?

    Like

  41. 42
    forgotten man says:

    Didn’t smell until you arrived.

    Like

  42. 43
    Rickytshirt says:

    Look Ed, if you don’t want to come out for a pint and bacon sandwich, just say.

    Like

  43. 44
    Nonny Mouse says:

    Giving a Dalek a handjob was one thing but even geeky Ed found it hard to swallow the Ejaculate…Ejaculate….Ejaculate!

    Like

  44. 45
    Ed Moribund says:

    Sorry. Been doing the ‘Green’ energy policies.

    They look nice, but they really, really stink.

    Like

  45. 46
    M says:

    “Warn me when you release an economic policy”

    Like

  46. 47
    Russ says:

    ED B…”Are you sure it wasn’t chicken?”
    ED M…”No definitely bacon!”

    Like

  47. 48
    Penfold says:

    Eddy….I’ve done a widdle.

    Like

  48. 49
    Denier_Supplier says:

    Let that be a warning to you, Ed about the dangers of ‘Confidence and Supply’.

    Like

  49. 50

    Ed M: “Not another pint of bitter and bacon sarnie for lunch!”

    Balls: “What? I thought you had a seat up North. Oh, I see, you meant North London”

    Like

  50. 51
    John N. says:

    The things I have to do. That burger was DISGUSTING!!

    Like

  51. 52
    T dog says:

    Ed McMuffin for breakfast

    Like

  52. 53
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Hey, Mili..when you were Gordon’s bag carrier did you ever have to give him a sponge bath?

    Like

  53. 54
    Ed Miliband says:

    Forget the middle It’s the squeezed bottom that worries me.

    Like

  54. 55
    Bill Quango MP says:

    We’re going to have rename these green benches a different colour.

    Like

  55. 56
    Drummond Base says:

    “Harriet’s let rip again”

    Like

  56. 57
    verticalwater says:

    Balls:- “For fuck sake Ed. who are we siding with”?

    Like

  57. 58
    Gromit says:

    That one must have set a benchmark, Wallace!

    Like

  58. 59
    The silent one says:

    Wensleydale Ed?

    Like

  59. 60
    The Wrong Miliband says:

    Now I know how Nick feels – I did so want to be a Prime Minister one day.

    Like

  60. 62
    Anonymous says:

    Come on Mr.Balls even i can’t come up with something that daft

    Like

  61. 63
    Stu says:

    Not in here Ed you’ll have to wait a few minutes.

    Like

  62. 64
    Ockham's Razor says:

    That’s even worse than Gordon’s.

    Like

  63. 65
    Stinks says:

    The CSA inquiry Terms Of Reference document has entered the room.

    Like

  64. 66

    “Why are you crying?”
    “They’re STILL calling me weird.”

    Like

  65. 67
    Ed Sillyband says:

    “There’s this new invention, Ballsy– it’s called ‘mouthwash’– you may wish to try it, after you’ve downed a few Scotches!”

    Like

  66. 68
    Jack K says:

    *The Eds*: “Harriet there’s kicking up a stink and then there’s this! Eesh!”

    *HH*: “Don’t worry gents, my “gas” is progressive and hits the richest hardest, the common folk won’t even get a whiff…”

    Like

  67. 69
    Cam. Ambert says:

    God Ed! Your cock is so cheesy.

    Like

  68. 70
    nasal ed says:

    ooooof Blinker, I’ve told you to stop cooking Lasagne on a Tuesday night

    Like

  69. 71
    Double Agent says:

    “I’m telling you, the best Top Trumps series is Battleships by far”

    “No waaaaaaay. Tanks (series 2).”

    Like

  70. 72
    Corry O'Lanus says:

    Balls “Should we bring some useless birds in too?”
    Pede “FFS ‘mutton dressed as lamb’ working class scouser types??!!”

    Like

  71. 73

    Not the only bad smell in Westminister

    Like

  72. 74
    E says:

    Ok both Ed’s. Show us your cum faces

    Like

  73. 75
    Anonymous says:

    “My God, that’s strikingly similar to Yvette’s orgasm face.”

    Like

  74. 76
    Ian Bart says:

    EdB, “Well, here’s another nice mess you’ve gotten me into. UMM”
    EdM crying…..

    Like

  75. 77
    fhip says:

    Paraphrasing the three coppers defence whilst lying their arses off in front of the plebgate select committee “she said what she said but she didn’t say what she did say”

    Like

  76. 78
    Was prodding cloth.. says:

    Can we open a window please Mr Sthpeaker, Ed’s followed through..

    Like

  77. 79
    Anonymous says:

    Is that our 2015 Manifesto I can smell….

    Like

  78. 80

    I din’t know what stinks more Ed, what comes out of her arse or her mouth.

    Like

  79. 81
    Oh, really? says:

    “Was that you, Ed?” “Yes, Ed, I am afraid it was. My media preparedness team had me practising eating bacon sandwiches all morning and I think I just shat myself.”

    Like

  80. 82
    Jim Halpern says:

    Miliband goes from out of touch to touching cloth.

    Like

  81. 83
    Winston says:

    Helen Goodman…would you?

    Like

  82. 84
    Everard says:

    ” The Tory policies make you sit and think ”

    ” Yes, and the bacon butties makes you shit and stink! “

    Like

  83. 85
    Everard says:

    ” Your speech was very moving, ….. bowel moving “

    Like

  84. 86
    geordieboy says:

    One thing you will win Ed is a Gurning Contest, all you need is the horse collar.

    Like

  85. 87
    The Critic says:

    So let me get this straight – your plan is to vault the dispatch box and give Cameron a karate chop whilst putting on your scary face?

    That won’t make you PM though.Come to think of it,neither will anything else

    Like

  86. 88
    Anonymous says:

    Have You Got a kleenex Ed that woman
    makes me cry!!

    Like

  87. 89
    Maimed Codger says:

    I can’t quite put my finger on what’s wrong…

    Like

  88. 90
    Nick H says:

    Really, the public don’t like me?”

    Like

  89. 91
    Mike Wilkinson says:

    “Harriet’s only gone and dropped a bomb again”….

    Like

  90. 93
    Carney Easing says:

    It was terrible, the bacon wasn’t kosher and there wasn’t any hummus or halloumi. Do they really live on that stuff.

    Like

  91. 94
    Mother Duck says:

    “Ed, I need to leave early; I’m touching cloth”

    Like

  92. 96
    Scouse tory loser says:

    Did that dopey bitch HH really say that!

    Like

  93. 97
    The Anglo Saxon says:

    Harriet’s dropping hints again that she wants Grimsby as her next seat.

    Like

  94. 98
    Midge says:

    It’s MY party, and I’ll cry if I want to…

    Like

  95. 100
    Grommitt says:

    Well I was going to bum you tonight but not now you have shat yourself!

    Like

  96. 101
    2Eds are worse than 0 says:

    “Golly, the stench of union power is disgusting.”

    Like

  97. 102
    Steve says:

    If you’re gonna blow it out your arse Ed … in future make sure it goes in the Government direction

    Like

  98. 104
    Vote Dave? Get stuffed says:

    Do our policies stink that much?

    Like

  99. 105
    Another Headshrinker says:

    Either Harriet has eaten a shit sandwich, or she’s talking shit again!

    Like

  100. 107
    howdi says:

    To think we both had Stephanie,and now we’ve ended married to the fugly sisters.

    Like

  101. 108
    AndyF says:

    Balls: The internet has finally discovered that you look like Mrs Tweedy from ‘Chicken Run’

    Like

  102. 109
    Tom says:

    Ed M: the one who smelt it dealt it.
    Ed B: the one who denied it supplied it.

    Like

  103. 110
    Anonymous says:

    looks like weare in the s*** again mate !

    Like

  104. 111
    Spon says:

    I hear Obama’s stocking up on Bacon Butties for your power breakfast!

    Like

  105. 112
    Paul Bishop says:

    How did you get so far with that gag reflax

    Like

  106. 113
    Mycroft says:

    EB to EM…

    That was a follow through wasn’t it!

    Like

  107. 115
    Guido Fawkes, the last man to enter Parliament with honest intent. says:

    Don’t cry Eddy.
    But that nasty Cameron Major just did an eggy one in my face.

    Like

  108. 117
    Red Ed the allmighty says:

    Is that the sweet smell of success ?

    Like

  109. 118
    Giveusaprizewhydoncha says:

    Balls: “You really do need help Ed…weirdo…”

    Like

  110. 119
    Peter A Bell says:

    Don’t mention Johann! http://i.imgur.com/E75fZtf.jpg

    Like

  111. 120
    Idon'tneednodoctor says:

    Ed Miliband – Jesus Christ who dropped that one.
    Ed Balls – It was either Emily Thornberry or Diane Abbott, I heard they both went out for curry last night.

    Like

  112. 121
    Harry Krishna says:

    No I don’t want Margaret Becketts phone number!!

    Like

  113. 122
    Ed U Cation says:

    Deadhead Ed: I’ve an idea, why don’t we just come clean with the Electorate and say that “whoever is in power next, there’ll have to be Tax Rises and Spending Cuts”?
    Red Ed: Don’t be silly, then there’ll be absolutely no reason for people to vote Labour, as all they know we can do is Spend, Spend, Spend!

    Like

  114. 123
    Anonymous says:

    Ed, please don’t tell me unemployment is down again and the economy is growing strongly – it makes my cry.

    Like

  115. 124
    Easy easy says:

    Ed Balls : “Eleventy?”

    Like

  116. 125
    bogtrott says:

    I told you not to have the sprouts and the bitter in the restaurant earlier today.Balls

    Like

  117. 126
    Ken Kennford says:

    ED1 – How can we stop the bad smell?
    ED2 – We could setup local groups to address this serious issue to the quality of life for people
    ED1 – We could call them “Forum to Address the Release of Terrible Gas Omissions”
    Ed2 FARTGO I like it – How do we fund them
    ED1 – Bankers Bonus Tax?

    Like

  118. 127
    Alexei Romanov says:

    I know farting is good for you but that’s honking!

    Like

  119. 128
    Froggie says:

    And I said to this weirdo “F off Taffy

    Like

  120. 129
    cecil rhodes says:

    Sorry Ed, It’s all that champagne and caviar. .

    Like

  121. 130
    MayfairMagFan says:

    That stinks, David!

    Like

  122. 131
    Ed Balls says:

    It’s not that I am dying for a shit, but the first inch and a half is stone cold.

    Like

  123. 132
    Ed Balls says:

    A whiff of my new improved endogenous growth theory will soon sort out the doubters!

    Like

  124. 133
    Ed Balls says:

    Did you just follow through?

    Like

  125. 134
    Ed Balls says:

    Karl Marx or Skid Marx?

    Like

  126. 136
    Vinny says:

    One of the Eds, it doesn’t really matter which one:

    “The stench of our hypocrisy has reached an all time high thanks to this Tory government.”

    Like

  127. 137
    Llareggub says:

    Did you fart before Ms Harman? But I did not know it was her turn.

    Like

  128. 138
    Lord Fondleboys says:

    FFS Bally have you been rimming Gay Gordon again? Phewoooar!!

    Like

  129. 139
    Rightallalong says:

    Just face it Ed ! The Tories are creating jobs.

    Like

  130. 140

    “No one dresses for PMQ’s in a Coalition tie.”

    Like

  131. 141
    Robbie says:

    So is it a double date night tonight?

    Like

  132. 143
    Shaft Ed says:

    Cost of loving crisis

    Like

  133. 144
    Ed says:

    I can always tell when Bercow has come into the Chamber

    Like

  134. 145
    Fabians are Evil says:

    “Will no one rid me of that woman?” ‘Blast!….. I forgot to put my hand over the microphone again’

    Like

  135. 146
    Anonymous says:

    No wonder they call you Femin-arsy.

    Like

  136. 147
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    And they made me eat a bacon butty !

    Like

  137. 148
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    “And i was just about to go down on your Yvette when her cock poked me in the eye”

    Like

  138. 149
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    “I decided to try one of those 69’s with Justine , as i went down she let rip right in my face”
    i got up to leave and she said “where are you going ” ?
    I said ” i couldn’t stand another 68 of those”

    Like

  139. 150
    Gordon Broon says:

    “So Hattie pulled off her knickers and ………..”

    Like

  140. 151
    Gordon Broon says:

    And then he said “get into bed with clegg “…..

    Like

  141. 152
    Gordon Broon says:

    “Bercow’s ego gets fishier every day …………..”

    Like

  142. 153
    Millibee says:

    oh, follow through . . .

    Like

  143. 154
    Harry Benn's Pig says:

    Smell it? I’m sitting in it.

    Like

  144. 155
    Anonymous says:

    BALLS: It wasn’t me, you prick!

    Like

  145. 156
    Anonymous says:

    “Friday Caption Contest (Silent But Deadly Edition)”
    Ed accidentally achieves what no true transitory politician has ever previously managed to do in the history of politics. Follow-through on a commitment.

    Like

  146. 157
    Genghiz the kahn says:

    I is for Imodium.

    Like

  147. 158
    Anonymous says:

    Ed to Balls “tell me Ballsy which one of us just tharted?

    Like

  148. 163
    Anonymous says:

    Ed to Ballsey, “I dont want to know what Yvette does when you pull out”

    Like

  149. 165
    Anonymous says:

    Dear Guido and your fellow travellers.

    What the flippin eck is going on with your blog ( and that’s swearing!)

    I type in various posts and it is as if your WordPress blog is a valve set version.

    If it was any slower I would personally deliver a hand written letter – in lavish
    italic scrolling personally or via Vince ( call me Knocker ) Cable in order to get my ponit across.

    So come on get more Servers or butlers as they call them in Knightsbridge and speed the the thing up.

    Otherwise I can never get my blow in against Sky News or the BBC just in case some idiot who runs the TV News takes notice of all these posts.

    If you take no notice of this message missive then you are a big fat idiot.

    If you do then I withdraw the previous insult with no offence intended.

    Yours ever.

    A diconcerted poster/commentator.

    p.s I know everything and nothing.

    Anon. Brave but secretive.

    Like

  150. 166
    Neil Pace says:

    I know you’re nervous, but bloody hell…

    Like

  151. 167
    sandyhall1@live.co.uk says:

    Caption competition

    Do you really have to have a vindaloo every evening before PMQs?

    Like

  152. 168
    John Bellingham says:

    Of course I farted. Do you think that I always smell like this?

    Like

  153. 169
    polite if nothing else says:

    Balls: “Why not make Harriet deputy PM?”

    Like


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“Digger” Murdoch says:

Is it just me, or is Nigel Farage just a top hat and a monocle away from being a Batman villain?


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