July 14th, 2014

THE RESHUFFLE: All the Sackings as They Happen

22.52: You read it all here first:

A Downing Street spokesperson said:

The Prime Minister has accepted the resignations of the following Ministers:

- The Rt Hon Kenneth Clarke QC MP (Minister without Portfolio)
- The Rt Hon David Willetts MP (Minister of State, BIS)
- The Rt Hon Alan Duncan MP (Minister of State, DFID)
- The Rt Hon Hugh Robertson MP (Minister of State, FCO)
- The Rt Hon Sir George Young Bt MP, (Chief Whip and Parliamentary Secretary to the Treasury)
- The Rt Hon Andrew Robathan MP (Minister of State, Northern Ireland Office)
- The Rt Hon Gregory Barker MP (Minister of State, DECC)

10.15pm: Phillip Hammond will take over at FCO. Eurosceptic.

10:00pm: William Hague out as Foreign Secretary, he becomes Leader of the House and will stand down from parliament at the election.

10:00pm: Andrew Lansley sacked.

9:58pm: Stephen Crabb is the new Welsh Secretary.

9:28pm: Owen Paterson sacked as Environment Secretary.

9:07pm: Solicitor General Oliver Heald also leaving.

9.03pm: Greg Barker out of DECC and will quit parliament next year.

8:34pm: Attorney General Dominic Grieve leaves the government.

8:16pm: Transport minister Stephen Hammond out.

8:07pm: Police minister Damian Green sacked.

7:30pm: David Willetts quits, will leave parliament next year.

7:27pm: Nick Hurd stands down as Minister for Civil Society.

7:18pm: Northern Ireland Minister Andrew Robathan quits.

7:17pm: Development Minister Alan Duncan quits “at his own request”.

5:36pm: Ken Clarke quits as Minister Without Portfolio.

5:29pm: David Jones sacked as Welsh Secretary.

Developing…


537 Comments

  1. 1
    David Jones says:

    Never mind, I’m still a household name. At least in my own house; look you.

  2. 2
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    Re-arranging the deck chairs on the Tory Titanic :-)

  3. 3
    NE Frontiersman says:

    Is Ken Clarke the new Minister for Children?

  4. 4
    lescrompsblogg says:

    The reshuffle shuffle, let the dance begin

  5. 5
    Whiffler says:

    Where did I go?

  6. 6
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

  7. 7
    Gerhard says:

    So Wales can sod right off in the eyes of Cameron – the first Welsh-speaking Welsh Secretary in decades is sacrificed on the altar of “equality”.

  8. 8
    SwearyExpat says:

    Why do we even have a Welsh secretary?

  9. 9
    A Ship's Lawyer says:

    I am absolutely gutted at this news.

  10. 10

    Why has the sacking not been announced in Welsh ?

  11. 11
    Fishy says:

    Have the two Ed’s been sacked yet?

  12. 12
    M­a­­q­bo­­ul says:

    Don’t think that’s the reason he was booted out. Most Welsh can’t speak Welsh but who’s to say that the next Welsh secretary isn’t a Welsh speaker as well, if not a women Welsh speaker?

  13. 13
    Yvonne from the Colliers Arms Clydach says:

    David Cameron does not care about Welsh women and men .

  14. 14
    RED LEN says:

    I make those decisions.

  15. 15
    M­a­­q­bo­­ul says:

    Why isn’t his Welsh country cottage not burning as we speak?

  16. 16
    Dafydd ap Gwilym says:

    Because England still insists on the majority of law making for Wales

  17. 17
    Abdel from Tooting says:

    In the past the old caring Tory Party were always concerned about young boys in orphanages in North Wales.

  18. 18

    Ken Clarke gone ? Sweet – But who gets to fill his shoes ?

    Is this Dave’s early evening of the butter knives ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  19. 19
    Harridan Harmanhater says:

    He’s a misogynist and a racist.

    We need more all-Welsh women shortlists.

  20. 20
    Abdel from Tooting says:

    I remember the Tories putting one of their Mps in Angelesey.

    That ended in tears when he went to jail for fiddling his applications on those undervalued IPOs Margaret Thatcher liked handing out.

  21. 21
    IDS says:

    I’ll take anything, even Northern Ireland, to get away from the Universal Credit omnishambles

  22. 22
    Dafydd ap Gwilym says:

    Someone like John Redwood, you mean?

  23. 23
    Mystic Mog says:

    Ken is destined for the House of Lards.

  24. 24
    Sheikh Basha Banka says:

    I remember the days of which you speak.

    At the time we were inundated in the Bank with applications for personal loans to enable people to fill their socks with shares in those national utilities.

    In most cases the applications were approved with little questioning because everyone realised the shares were one way bets.

    Happy days.

  25. 25
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    Will Davy Jones be emptying his locker :-)

  26. 26
    Welch are gits says:

    Look you, isn’t it, boyo.

    See, it really is not difficult to speak taff.

    Trying to find one that does not wave sticks at helicopters whilst shouting ‘Metal bird! Metal bird!’ Might be a bit trickier though.

    Hairy-palmed in-breds, mostly.

  27. 27
    Dave's babes says:

    I’m safe! Because I’ll cry if I’m not promoted.
    Cry and claim sexism!

    And tell the papers Tory men are all pigss.
    So gimme a plum job. Even if I am thicker than a Harman-Abbott sandwich.

  28. 28
    Fat Ken says:

    Good timing – I’m off to the Montreux Jazz Festival – see you at the BAT pavilion.

    They’ve sorted me a tart to polish my instrument in The Royal Plaza tonight too.

    Wahoo!!!

  29. 29
    Where's my fucking owl says:

    Footsie under the table time is this……….and pass the butter.

  30. 30
    The Lone Ranger says:

    When the Monkees started they were criticised by the snoots of the BBC for being a “made up” pop group. No doubt the beeboids will now be saying Jones was another Shubert

  31. 31
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    Except most privatisation share allocations to the public were massively limited due to being massively oversubscribed.

  32. 32
    Bill Quango MP says:

    This reshuffle on the day they get that sunken liner back upright.

    Some sort of parallel there…

  33. 33
    Twampersand mk II says:

    Minister for slap-headed twats?

  34. 34
    Del Boy says:

    Looks like Tessie May will be heading up the Welsh Office.

  35. 35
    Sheep Shagger says:

    Baaabera?

  36. 36
    Gerhard says:

    Sacked to give the job to a woman.

    Given there are no female Conservative MPs representing Welsh constituencies, they’ll have to send one across the border.

  37. 37
    A Chinaman says:

    Is IDS Welsh ?

  38. 38
    The Lone Ranger says:

    He was already there in spirit.

  39. 39
    A Chinaman says:

    I heard his granny was.

    Is that good enough?

  40. 40
    Peter North says:

    Yep, all over Esther’s face.

  41. 41
    Loki says:

    Chris ‘Nicola Murray’ Grayling has to go! His policy of saving money is costing taxpayers a f*cking fortune!!!

  42. 42

    EU Commissar – he’s been working for that sinecure for years.

  43. 43
    Bill Quango MP says:

    I know its a minority view but Ken Clarke should have been in the Treasury with Osbo.
    Not feckin’ justice where his softy softy approach is useless. Justice and Home need hard faced bastards.

    Treasury needed experience. Someone not to dumb to fall for the civil service saying “if you remove pasties from VAT exemption it will make our job an awful lot easier, Chancellor. And save quite a bit of cash too…”

    “Really how much?”

    “Oh…I dare say quite an amount..possibly, quite a sum…considering the amount of baked and reheated products on sale in the UK..yes..possibly a..erm..well..an amount!”

    “Great! Let’s do it!”

  44. 44
    William Vague says:

    Ahem, that’s MY JOB!

  45. 45
    The British media are cunts says:

    #bringbackourgirls

    Hey you dopey dykes how’s your Twatter campaign going then…….

  46. 46
    Unlucky Alf says:

    :)

  47. 47
    Jack Charlton says:

    Yep.

  48. 48
    David 'balls of' Steel says:

    Couldn’t he sack Nick Clegg? The Lib Dems would vote for it!

  49. 49
    Sheikh Basha Banka says:

    If you were staff you could fill your boots with the allocations: you could not be scaled back.

    That is where the serious money was made.

    The idiot Tory in Ynys Mon was making multiple applications in false names !

  50. 50
    Old Estonian says:

    Bugger.

  51. 51
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    They are selling it for cast iron scrap :-)

  52. 52

    Penelope Twiglet (Loamshire South) becomes Minister Without Handbag.
    Sid Sidhu (Poundland and Brighthouse) moves from Bubbleblowing to Loom Bands.
    Tarquin Monstermunch (Farrowball) becoes Secretary of State for Outreach.
    Deirdre Pineapple-Chunk (The Loathings) becomes Under-Secretary for Secretaries.
    Devon Token-Blackman (East Weston) becomes Blackboard Monitor (Communities).

  53. 53
    Dave Wisteria says:

    Not after what happened last time, Maria .

  54. 54
    Jimmy says:

    “Ken Clarke quits”

    So no adult supervision then?

  55. 55
    Bill Quango MP says:

    I think, given the polls, there is only one thing to do.

    Get the missile keys out of the Treasury Bunker and go “Gordon” on the economy.

    Brown spent 10 years GDP in a single year. He increased the already huge UK debt by 100%. He actually spent more money than it cost to fight World War two. In a single year.

    He didn’t turn the taps on so much as rip the sink from the wall and smash the taps off with an iron bar.

    So…payback time.

    Cameron should cut the top rate of tax to 25p.
    And the lower rate to 5p.

    There you go! Instant success. Not enough to win the election but enough to give Miliboy the Liberals as his allies in a coalition with a wafer thin mint majority.

    Then let those cretins tell the public “We have to put up tax because ..erm..the Tories wrecked the economy”

    Dave , or whoever, can point, much as Labour do now, to the massive spending boom that they had engineered that was driving the economy.. he can say that the boom has, now , sadly been chocked off by Labour’s callous, inhuman tax rises.

    So the economy is ruined? So what?

    Dave can say
    “It was like this when we got here!”

    And he’d be right , too.

  56. 56
    White Dee says:

    Being elevated to a Life Peer and placed in charge of DWP was quite a surprise!

    But as Dave said, no-one knows more about claiming benefits than me.

  57. 57
    Taxpayer says:

    Who’s Minister for Punitive Tax Rates on the Middle Classes? Or is that all of them? Wankers.

  58. 58
    Scrappy-do-do. says:

    I hope the deckchairs haven’t floated off.

  59. 59
    NE Frontiersman says:

  60. 60
    Taxpayer says:

    Cameron cut taxes? Dont make me laugh. He’s obsessed with high taxes and ludicrous marginal rates on those who want to get on.

  61. 61
    Bishop's fingerr says:

    Nasty – but apopsite.

  62. 62
    ukip.I.am says:

    Reshuffle? Sack every last one of them! Shower of bastards.

  63. 63
    Cameron Is A CUNT says:

    Home Office – not fit for purpose

    DWP – not fit for purpose

    No10 – not fit for purpose

    GET RID OF THE LOT OF THEM

  64. 64
    NE Frontiersman says:

    ‘Most Welsh can’t speak Welsh ..';
    Wales today, London tomorrow; Tower Hamlets, already.

  65. 65
    Cameron Is A CUNT says:

    nevermind the right to justice

  66. 66

    Hopefully they get some big strong black politicians in *innocent face*

  67. 67
    Cameron Is A CUNT says:

    where is ed milibanana???

  68. 68
    Benefit Street locals please remain my friend says:

    Poacher turned Game keeper.

  69. 69
    Cameron Is A CUNT says:

    fuck esther, I mean really fuck the lying, two-faced gobshite

  70. 70
    Esther McVile is a CUNT says:

    Esther McVile here
    you boy, shut up whilst I am talking, like
    Now, I am the new leader of the government and you lot had better shape up, like
    Alright
    Get on with it and leave the spin to me

  71. 71

    Bill, will you give Ken a gentle shake and, when he’s awake-ish, tell him it’s time to clear his desk?

  72. 72

    Dave may have invested in some of May’s Rosa Klebb line for tappy toes this time.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  73. 73
    Esther McVile is a CUNT says:

    Osbo needs an ASBO – cnunt

  74. 74

    ‘Miaow’ : As Larry would say.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  75. 75
    Esther McVile is a CUNT says:

    Me again

    Anybody want a go?

  76. 76
    M­a­­q­bo­­ul says:

    Stephen Crabb is a woman? That’ll be a surprise to me as well as his wife.

  77. 77
    Bishop Bashar says:

    Tata Ken Clarke. About time of course, but another ‘proper’ politician gone to make way for Cameron’s plastic army

  78. 78
    ron Vibbentrop says:

    Yes. BAAAAAAAAAAAHHH

  79. 79
    Not in my name says:

    Slaughter of the Limp Dems.

    I hope

  80. 80
    Anonymous says:

    Well,well. The Labour Party stall.

  81. 81
    Esther McVile is a CUNT says:

    Do me …………. NOW

  82. 82
  83. 83
    ron Vibbentrop says:

    The band is still playing

  84. 84
    P l e b says:

    The older moderate Tories are going to have to give way to extreme right wing “younger women”,like Priti Patel who wants to bring back capital punishment -hanging and Esther Mcvey etc. Cameron has decreed he wants more right wingers and women in the cabinet.

  85. 85
    Ed Balls, shallow chancellor says:

    So 8 sacked, 8 promoted, net change eleventy. Is that right?

  86. 86
    M­a­­q­bo­­ul says:

    No avuncular McCLuskey guiding hands in the conservative party. Is that a good thing? Yes, undoubtedly.

  87. 87
    George Osborne says:

    I’m giving new powers to HMRC to come round and shag your missus.

  88. 88
    non taxable pikey says:

    I know it was due but can’t help thinking it will cover up the debacle of Butler Sloss.

  89. 89
    Tom the Nonce says:

    No its black Jack of Harmskids fame. he has impeccable references.

  90. 90
    Tony, world statesman says:

    Thank you!

  91. 91
    Grant Shapps says:

    Has Maria Miller been sacked yet?

  92. 92
    Captain Panick says:

    With your mother?

  93. 93
    LOL says:
  94. 94
    The poof in residence says:

    More and more bumsex, lovely jubbly.

  95. 95
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Absolutely fucking brilliant example of combined strategic and tactical genius!

    Therefore they will never go for it.

  96. 96
    Jimmy says:

    Reshuffle update: DWP – Portfolio without Minister

  97. 97
    Beers are on the new welsh secretary says:

    You don’t need to speak Welsh to be accepted in an authoritative position of telling the taffs what to do. Drinking copious amounts of beer, liquid lunches and buying your rounds are the sole requirements.

  98. 98
    Lottie Dexter says:

    Well,fuck me slowly !

  99. 99
    Anonymous says:

    Big Dave doesn’t care for the Welsh, neither do we, There you go now

  100. 100
    The Sun Still Shines says:

    Ken jumped before he was pushed. :) Taffy Nonsense gone. :)

  101. 101
    Ockham's Razor says:

    It has only taken them from 1972 to do this.

    Lighteningly quick reactions here.

  102. 102
    don't come back, ever says:

    Illegally deported from wales to england

  103. 103
    tourist from Bonn says:

    Should be there in the morning.

  104. 104
    Esther McVey says:

    Someone on here is trying to impersonate me, very badly I must say.
    However, if anyone is interested I would be very happy if you DID ME, NOW, SLOWLY then fuck off

  105. 105
    Owen Jones QC says:

    Mr Cameron is reshuffling the Cabinet. Mr Clegg is helping out by reshuffling the garden furniture in the Downing Street shed.

  106. 106
    Gosh says:

    Keith Best.

    He did some time and then re-emerged as Chief Exec of a huggy charity.

    Bless.

  107. 107
    Esther McVey says:

    that was my idea you shit!!!!!!!!!!

  108. 108
    Iain Duncan Smith says:

    Hear ! Hear !

  109. 109
    Reimer says:

    You’re a looker, Esther, and I’d be seriously tempted were it not for your ferocious Desperate Scousewives persona which would be more fitting on one of Labour’s wimmin.

    R

  110. 110
    time for another merger says:

    Who would replace Nick Clegg? The eligible pool is dwindling to hardly anything.

  111. 111
    The EU says:

    Have I been reshuffled yet?

  112. 112
    Anonymous says:

    Not like.

  113. 113
    Reimer says:

    I take it “right wing” in this context means noisy enthusiasm for Thatchonomics, prefaced with a hashtag (cos they’re modern campaigning wimmin).

  114. 114

    Global warming ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  115. 115
    Reimer says:

    Ken will be spending more time down at Ronnie’s where his chortling tenor will make the Hushpuppies the greatest UK interpreters of Hard Bop known to Bilderprov.

  116. 116
    David Cameron says:

    Just like my dearest colleague Lady Butler-Shloss, I am not the right man for the job ……..

  117. 117
    David Cameron says:

    LIAR

  118. 118
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    So Ken Clarke finally hangs up his hush puppies to spend more time with his jazz mags :-)

  119. 119
    Ockham's Razor says:

    The European Union in Crisis. The Geopolitics of Russia-EU Pipeline Corridors

    http://www.globalresearch.ca/the-european-union-in-crisis-the-geopolitics-of-eu-russia-pipeline-corridors/5391139

  120. 120
    Welsh Secretary's secretary says:

    Being overweight, thick, assorted kids from different sperm, cheaply dressed, unkempt, gobby and skilless are also commonplace.

    Depressing really.

  121. 121
  122. 122
    Seasoned Watcher says:

    Clearly not a real welshman. He should have said ‘look, you, BOYO’.

  123. 123
    SleeplessInKirkcaldy says:

    Combining the post with Agriculture and Fisheries

  124. 124
    Dennis McShane says:

    Yes, probably Polish.

  125. 125
    Seriously says:

    And you wonder why people vote UKIP?

  126. 126
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Don’t give Atos.

  127. 127
    eat my sausage says:

    Is the Minister Without Portfolio the one who makes sure all the files go missing?

  128. 128
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    After a quick five fingered shuffle , Dave has come up with a short list to replace Butler Sloshed as head of his enquiry
    Some of which might be otherwise disposed

    Sidney Cooke
    Rolf Harris
    Jimmy So vile
    Gary Glitter
    Stuart Hall
    Cyril Smith

    We must have a totally unbiased enquiry , with lots of stones left unturned
    The truth is out there , where it will remain

  129. 129
    Londoner Dromley says:

    I’m staying put representing Birmingham

  130. 130
    Jumbo says:

    Gonna be a restless evening of editorial inactivity for Guido, Spectator and others

  131. 131
    Welsh Secretary's secretary says:

    You should not pander to these medieval savages. Fuck off with your Urdu and fuck off with your candidacy.

  132. 132
    You must be joking says:

    Camoron lies prostrate in front of the alter equality for woman, no greasy poles , a big welcome on the door , come on in with no knowledge or experience and like all women drivers reverse into the garage door or park across 2 bays, god help us, no one else will .

  133. 133
    softly softly says:

    They tried to reshuffle Ed Miliband’s brain, but it still came out as a blank sheet of paper.

  134. 134
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    UKIP and the other anti-EU parties can get all the sports fans throughout Europe onside by starting a massive campaign to save our national teams from the federalist monster of the United States of Europe.

    A USE will mean no more German,England,France or Italian football teams in the World Cup and no more European Championships in any sport.

    Only by leaving the EU can we preserve our national sports teams.

  135. 135
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    He’s going to spend more time with his granma , or is that his wife ?

  136. 136

    Can’t, there’s a coke bottle in the way.

  137. 137
    Reimer says:

    Too right: this stuff is like the big character culls in soap operas, but deemed far more high minded for its occurring amid the charade known as “politics”, and avidly lapped up by the professional bumsniffers & wannabes.

  138. 138

    Whatever happened to roger Cook, the fat consumer investigator?

  139. 139
    Rumpboy says:

    We do think the Transmanche region has rather too many layers of government. We intend imposing direct rule from Bruxelles.

  140. 140
    for in hope than expectation says:

    Fucking genius if all MPs and those standing 2015 disappeared without trace.

  141. 141
    You must be joking says:

    Oh the innocence of the constitutents that voted for her in Caldy, Hoylake, Irby and Pensby or West Wirral for the correct place, she won’t get back in again, we can’t afford her expenses or want to be deeply into the EU, May 2015 Camoron even if Ed gets in.

  142. 142
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Dave is practicing his “Shuffle”

    Come next year he will need it to shuffle out the back door of No 10

  143. 143
    Owen Jones says:

    Mmmmm, yes please!

  144. 144
    scot git says:

    I want to cheer on a winning team for once

  145. 145
    Diane Abbott says:

    Ready when you are Owen xx

  146. 146

    Sick of being treated like some dumb sheep as one London tosser after another gets sent he-ure, look you.

    Who next, …?

  147. 147
    Edgar says:

    Look you, boyoski?

  148. 148
    IDS says:

    Heston Travel Lodge 9pm?

  149. 149
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    Secretary of State for Welsh Affairs otherwise known as sheep shagging :-)

  150. 150
    Roger says:

    I’m waiting by the phone, but I may be a bit past it too, like the shloshed butler.

  151. 151
    The Fucker says:

    He’ll be off to a nice little jobs with his mates at G4S.

    Fuck you plebs!!!

  152. 152
    You must be joking says:

    Why bother football supporters are too thick to notice things like that, all the EU has to do is drip feed it to them and like shellfish, the heat will get them first or even the swollows.

  153. 153
    The Fucker says:

    You could always rip his balls off, paint eyes on them and attach them to a sock puppet. No fucker would notice.

  154. 154
    Elmet constituent says:

    Is this twat related to that ginger, moronic, useless piece of shit Colin Burgon?

    Worst. MP. ever.

  155. 155
    Jack Dromey says:

    I demand a tax investigation. Now. Please. Pretty please.

  156. 156
    Oy McVey says:

    You still have the whip?

    I’ll give you £20.

  157. 157
    Ockham's Razor says:

    I have never found a companion that was so companionable as solitude. We are for the most part more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers. A man thinking or working is always alone, let him be where he will. – Henry David Thoreau

    Goodbye Ken. As one door closes, another one slams shut.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  158. 158
    Gordon B says:

    Well….

  159. 159
    Stephen "fry you little rascal" says:

    I’ll see you in chambers

  160. 160
    Shadwell says:

    Oh, you’ve the family then?

  161. 161
    A Nightmare on Elm Guest House Street says:

    Lots of surprise resignations. Almost as if there are some shocking revelations about to hit.

  162. 162
    Bert says:

    And to boost consumption, change the VAT rate to -20%. That’s right, when you spend £10 on VATable goods, the government sends you £2 … which you can spend in turn and receive another 40p.

    The economy would go off like my Aunt Maude when Uncle Julian finally discovered her clitoris.

  163. 163
    Bumservative Party says:

    Didn’t someone once empty a bucket of shit over his head?

    I think Tom Jones would make a good candidate.

  164. 164
    Shadwell says:

    David Jones has been a baaaaad baaaaad boy and he mutton do it again.

  165. 165
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    Either a Conservative hold with increased majority or a Conservative gain in 2015 :-)

  166. 166
    Hawkeye says:

    Google Ken Clark Ben Fellows for an eye opener.

  167. 167
    Anal Duncan says:

    Fuck you all. I’m off back into oil – Johnson’s Baby Oil – page 19 of ‘Men’s Health’ next month.

  168. 168
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    Larry the cat :-)

  169. 169
    jellohello says:

    Household name. Like Domestos.

  170. 170
    The British media are cunts says:

    The Tories need to get rid of that Hunt Cameron to stand even a remote chance of winning.

  171. 171
    Timothy McVeigh says:

    When’s tea ready Mum?

  172. 172
    Tachybaptus says:

    L’enfer, c’est les autres. — Jean-Paul Sartre

    Good riddance to the whole septic shower. Sadly, they will be replaced with others equally smelly.

  173. 173
    Confucious the Voter says:

    Croquet is to be granted Official EU Sport status, and member states will henceforth be required to provide unlimited statuary funding.

  174. 174
    Tachybaptus says:

    Oh fuck, mentioned Sartre’s second Christian name, got modded. Anyway, a pox on all the departing ministers, and also on their replacements.

  175. 175
  176. 176
    Confucious the Voter says:

    Statutory even.
    Should have gone to spec……

  177. 177
    white dee says:

    that twat Iain Duncan Something is hanging around looking for promotion. Well Cameron I ain’t going to take over the DWP minister job. Don’t care how desperate you are in filling it with someone who knows what to do.

  178. 178
    Tachybaptus says:

    Time to start a mag called Men’s Sickness with pictures of politicians’ bellies on the front cover. It would drive anyone to diet and exercise.

  179. 179
    I'm on the phone says:

    How’s that story about the phone conversation on the train looking? Is ids OK?

  180. 180
  181. 181
    Dab hand says:

    Strong rumours that John Hayes has quit (was minister without portfolio/ Dave’s minister for backbenchers)

  182. 182
    Bosom Buddy says:

    “David Willetts quits, will leave parliament next year”

    An opportunity for Esther to give service under Saint Vincent!

  183. 183
    Tachybaptus says:

    No, that’s probably right. Gilded statues of Juncker, Rompuy, Barroso and the other criminals to be erected in every city centre. Death penalty for defacement.

  184. 184
    Maggie says:

    Well, bugger me!

    As my PPS Sir Peter Morrison, my adviser Keith Joseph, my friend Peter Righton, my friend Jimmy Savile, my friends and MPs Sir Rhodes Boyson and Harvey Proctor, and my friend Lord Boothby said to the children.

  185. 185
    Jimmy says:

    Clarke and Duncan. I think that’s the last vestiges of competence taken care of.

  186. 186
    Not an oil painting says:

    You’re easily pleased. She’s got a face link a bulldog liking piss off a nettle.

  187. 187
    David Willetts Official says:

    Why has no twat taken the piss out of me yet on this page?

    Am I fucking invisible or something?

  188. 188
    Ed Milibandwagon says:

    That’s going in the manifesto!
    People will soon be spending so much they won’t need handouts.

  189. 189
    You must be joking says:

    No wonder the country has no money, where do they dig up these non jobs,

  190. 190
    Ed Milibandwagon says:

    Don’t worry.
    no one will ever take that prize away from you.
    Not even me.

  191. 191
    Bumservative Party says:

    That’s ma boy!

  192. 192
    Direct Dave says:

    And my first question to my cabinet friends was…

    “Have you ever had an interest in young children? If so, you better quit.”

  193. 193
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Has one term dave fired st Vincent of cable or ed windmills davey?

  194. 194
    Bill Quango MP {angry} says:

    Bugger – didn’t get the “minister for viewing water and solvent or oil based liquid colour which slowly evaporates to allow the forming of a hard film
    surface with a gloss or matt protective coating.

    what will i do with my parliamentary time now?

    {some blonde job with perky tits just got that plum job!}

  195. 195
    Blodwyn Welsh Secretary says:

    I’m a f^cking good secretary look you, go f^ck some sheep or something, bloody men!

  196. 196
    vince incapable says:

    I’m unsackable.

    no idea why. I’m old. Treacherous. Devious. Dim and foolish.

    I’ve cost the nation several billion pounds in just the last year. I plotted openly against my own leader. I make even the Brown one look semi-competent.

    Yet… here I am!

  197. 197
    The Poof In Residence says:

    Not enough benders left in the Cabinet.

  198. 198
    Neil Kinnock says:

    Well Awwwwwwlllllriiigghhhhhtttt!!!

  199. 199
    inside out says:

    So much for integration,here is a novel idea,if you can’t converse in English you can’t vote or stay in the UK.

  200. 200
    slush puppies says:

    The last scouse female minister had rather more ‘up top’ than Esther but was always prepared to give hours of service under her Prime Minister

    Every Good Girl Curries Favour

  201. 201

    Or perhaps a trap door has opened ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  202. 202
    Lard Prescott says:

    Ohhhh Kenno, youse and me Ken, Lard Prescott and Lard Clarke, going over all those old times, best buddies spending our attendance down at Ronnies on cigars, drink and food, food , food, food, food, food

  203. 203
    Gerry Mandering says:

    Dim Dave does it again. Just as you are pushing for a Tory government, you sack a few you don’t like. So from now on, they’ll be sitting on the back benches with their mates sniping at you at every turn. What a way to run a party. Its almost like he has a death wish – or under orders.

    Roll on 2015. UKIP will clean up here.

  204. 204
    Tosser Dave says:

    OK. OK . I resign myself. I now realise that I have been an unutterable fucking disaster as P.M.

    Frau Merkel told me to fuck off and confirmed Junket’s appointment. That finally confirmed that I am a useless weak prat.

    Never mind. My legacy is the legalisation of bumsex marriage. My Eton boyfriends really admire my determination in this respect.

  205. 205
    Anonymous says:

    Trying to emulate MacMillan’s night of the long knioves – did the Tory party no good at all

  206. 206
    Was the Butler sloshed? says:

    Knight to Queen’s Bishop for. . . . .

  207. 207
    Ockham's Razor says:

    They pronounce it ‘Pole’ anyway – strange chaps!

    L’Académie française – Crédit Lyonnais – don’t know which is worse.

  208. 208
    Shlo says:

    Labour had the Titanic the Coalition are in the lifeboats paddling furiously.

  209. 209
    David Davies says:

    I have been tossing and turning the other cheeks all night and can unequivocally confirm that I totally support the Prime Minister in the view that he is a useless prat.

  210. 210
    Guess Who says:

    When Dave was my fag at Eton he would bend over whenever I felt the urge to stuff his arse. He seemed to quite like it.

  211. 211
    Countdown says:

    I’m catching up on this, and eight gone so far — all male.

    Dave and PC cronies have taken fast-track course in window dressing.

    Won’t help, come the election.

  212. 212
    Ever Hopeful Joe Public says:

    FFS D.D. Stick a stiletto between the kweer’s ribs NOW

  213. 213
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Grub was obviously served at 6:00 pm so he could see how the wonderful BBC was reporting it. They are wonderful, the BBC. They do costume dramas, bad history and save the shrimp.

  214. 214
    Countdown says:

    Already in Brussels, in spirit..

  215. 215
    Fishy says:

    IN fairness, unlike Bliar, Cameron has largely stuck by his ministers – changes have been few and far between.

    DWP had 9 Secretaries of State in Bliar / Brown’s 13 years. And all of them were useless. No wonder DWP was a mess.

  216. 216
    PopIT says:

    he did lovely toasted muffins.

  217. 217
    Mystic Mog says:

    Willetts no doubt heading for a big QUANGO job.

  218. 218
    L Mensch, failed MP says:

    Can I have my seat back, the be fast-tracked to cabinet?

  219. 219
    DWP in need says:

    Nothing changing there.

  220. 220
    Political Holiday Time says:

    Attorney General Dominic Grieve. Interesting, very interesting. Responsible for choosing child abuse chair person?

  221. 221
    Anonymous says:

    Dave really does have a very high opinion of himself. Most people I know just see him as another Blair, just wants to be in no 10 but neither in office nor in power.

    He really is so weak policy wise just like Blair aimlessly drifting along in the hope that he will just get re-elected.

    I’m afraid Dave but that is not gonna happen mate!!

    Vote tory for a united states of europe without a vote
    Vote lib dem for a united states of europe without a vote.
    Vote labour for a united states of europe without a vote.
    Vote tory get labour!

    So just vote ukip.

  222. 222
    The BBC says:

    Our next costume drama is Nadresh’s War, about how black, Asian and other ethnic minority communities in Elizabethan England defeated the Spanish Armada.

    These costume dramas reach out to the ethnic communities who today, of course, account for the majority of Britain’s population outside London. While there are some white people outside London, they are mainly hard-working Eastern European immigrants who have always contributed to the economy.

  223. 223
  224. 224
    Anonymous says:

    Wouldn’t it be a right giggle if a couple of these sacked guys were to join UKIP tomorrow?
    Only asking…

  225. 225
    Hattie "PIE" Harmong, deput leader of the Labour Party and committed kiddy fiddler, says:

    Buggering children is perfectly acceptable. I fought for the right to bugger children, and I was right to.

  226. 226
    nell says:

    The view of folks like polling uk is that UKIP are going to get about 8% of the vote in 2015 -which will be a good starting point for them and give them a couple of MP’s which I hope includes nige – but they are not going to be in position to form a government just yet.

  227. 227

    Well, if nothing else at least ‘Two Faces’ Willetts has gone.

  228. 228
    ealing says:

    I am twinned with drunken place in France.

    Hey, Did you hear about 10% kashmiri Muslim Halifax. It is twinned with a spa town/city in Germany. It a appears that a lot of scientific work gets done there.

    So the link between shuffle on and this?

    The people with the biggest sense of self righteousness have an upper hand. No worries. Everyone is living in a different movie of their making.

  229. 229
    Rinka Scott says:

    Nine out of nine leaving are male.

    This is suspicious and a little sexist.

  230. 230

    And what will youngf Nige do if he’s elected? Collect his expenses and never turn up to the Commons because the only thing he believes is leaving the EY?

  231. 231
    IDS for UKIP says:

    Iain Smith now Duncan Smith behaves as if he should have been founding member, leader and still the leader of UKIP

  232. 232
    Bluto says:

    Also responsible for not sacking Labour supporter and activist Keir Starmer as DPP, a civil service post supposed to demonstrate strict impartiality.

    “Of Mr Starmer’s lecture (in 2009), Mr Grieve said: ‘This is a remarkable speech.
    ‘It envisages a role for the Crown Prosecution Service fundamentally different to the current one.’ He added: ‘It muses on the role of the Supreme Court, well beyond the DPP’s remit. And it crudely mis-states the Conservative position on the Human Rights Act.’ Mr Grieve said: ‘It will be difficult to sustain the cross-party convention of avoiding impinging on the independence of the DPP, if he continues to stray so far from his constitutional role.'”

    And yet Grieve allowed Starmer to stay in post and he is now advising the Labour party. This is a very dangerous man who wants to undermine traditional British justice and its safeguards in favour of the Napoleonic Code:-

    “But the row over its contents deepened as party leaders read it in full and discovered passages in which he also seemingly set out a role for himself as chief criminal investigator, prosecutor, jury and judge. They believe Mr Starmer wants to turn himself into a British version of the French investigating magistrate, an official appointed under France’s Napoleonic legal code who both questions and tries suspects. He said prosecutors should investigate crime alongside police, hand out fines and cautions out of court, present cases in court, and ‘assist the courts in the sentencing process’.
    They should consult public opinion to test what sort of crimes people wanted to see prosecuted, he said. Tories were also alarmed to discover Mr Starmer had been speculating about increased powers for the judges of the newly-launched Supreme Court. Mr Starmer said that the opening of the new tribunal meant ‘at least the possibility that we may see a move in time towards perhaps a constitutional court with which other jurisdictions are not only familiar but comfortable’.”

    Watch this space. He is now in cahoots with Thornberry. We have not heard the last of Comrade Starmer.

  233. 233
    Popcorn time! The inevitable that is to come. says:

    What, like Ken “pushed not jumped” Clarke?

    Maybe. What’s going to be really really funny is watching Dave “all-female selection lists” Camoron replace these people with useless cretins whose sole ‘qualification’ for the job is that they’ve got vaginas rather than any ability or experience, and then watching it all fall apart over the next 10 months.

    And then we get to watch Dimmy Dave cry his eyes out when the little tosser Miliband beats him in the general election.

  234. 234
    Owain the Jones says:

    Oooohhhhhhhhh!!!!

  235. 235
    You must be joking says:

    NO.

  236. 236
    Shite must go says:

    If Duncan Shite goes, and there is a big if, does Duncan Shite count as male. Not exactly human.

  237. 237
    Maggie says:

    Indeed! Which is why I never said anything about it, given that Peter Hayman was a member of PIE and my friend the Attorney General Michael Havers decided he shouldn’t be prosecuted. We’re all in this together.

  238. 238
    Come 2015 little nige says:

    Always in the Commons bar. Chin chin.

  239. 239
    Anonymous is a semi-literate moron says:

    Cameron is the only member of the Commons who’s as dim as Harriet the Man-Hater. Possibly. He’s so bloody dim you want to grab him by his tie and shake him until his eye-balls pop. The twat.

  240. 240
    Socialism = Starvation says:

    I am trying to think of a reshuffle that made government better, but I can think of no examples ever.

  241. 241
    Will Duncan Shite be banned from our thoughts says:

    Ten out of ten leaving are male. Space for Shite to add to the numbers.

  242. 242
    Anonymous is a semi-literate moron says:

    Oh. You mean Ken CLARKE, you idiot.

  243. 243
    Still Hope says:

    And Duncan Shite goes you will have one.

  244. 244
    UKIP for IDS says:

    UKIP for IDS

  245. 245
    dolphin square says:

    Duggy willy Hague going? That would be odd. What could prompt that?

  246. 246
    Oliver says:

    Eleven out of eleven. Time for some more.

  247. 247
     BBC Thought Police says:

    Racist!

  248. 248
    nmj says:

    I hate to be pedantic but it was already upright. Today, they refloated it.

  249. 249
     BBC Thought Police says:

    Racist!

  250. 250
    something of the night about him says:

    Are we there yet?

  251. 251

    Pale Male and Stale. The noose concentrates on the main problem facing us today.

    Sky pontificating on Will I Am Fackin Useless walking the plank.

  252. 252

    Thank you for your scintillating contribution. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  253. 253
    Boris Cashless-Buses says:

    Just keep your bum on the seat untill next year Davy Boy, the I’ii take over

  254. 254
    Getting out while he can? says:

    I wonder if one of those leaving the Cabinet is the one the whistleblower said he witnessed at a Tory underage sex party in the 80s and was still a serving minister in this government.

  255. 255
    Clone Ranger says:

    Owen P was one of the few able ministers:

    — when not bogged down by the leftoid quangos that Cameron promised to burn, but allowed to chase their dreams.

    I suspect Dave, bowing to Mumsnet to bring on the “sisters”, will regret this come the election.

    I’d say Cameon is a goner.

  256. 256
    Gunnery Sergeant Hartman says:

    9:28pm: Owen Paterson sacked.
    Badgers smirk.

  257. 257
    Realist says:

    The ministers really don’t matter. Any good ideas people have when they gain office are quickly destroyed by incompetent implementation within the civil service. This used to be accidental, but now the service is full of left wingers, who do not attempt to disguise or separate their personal views from their work, it’s intentional.

  258. 258
    LOL says:

    That’s actually funny.

  259. 259
    softly softly says:

    The Minister of Uphill Gardening has obviously gone as far up as he can and can go no further.

  260. 260
    You must be joking says:

    My missus says whoever is telling him what to do, should be the one that should be sacked, he’s too late , he should have done it before he went directly after Nige calling him racist, she says the moment he did that he lost the women’s vote, I think he has lost her vote, the bully going after the little boy calling him names that are not true, oh! dear, Esther McVey no woman’s vote .

  261. 261
    Anonymous says:

    Has Vince Cable been sacked yet?

  262. 262
    Brian May says:

    Got him with the first puff of gas

  263. 263
    let them eton cock says:

    Obviously a Tory diversion to show that they’re not all boy mad.

  264. 264
    Just a thought says:

    +1000

  265. 265
    Enrichment News 24 says:

  266. 266
    non taxable pikey says:

    At his own request? WTF does that mean? I await Developments with baited breath.

  267. 267
    hush, puppies says:

    And the burning question is, ‘competence in what’?

  268. 268
    Allegedly says:

    Hope you’re not implying this is a pervert cull?!

  269. 269
    Brazilian Rentboy says:

    Slap it on, bitch me up.

  270. 270
    Al Ducnan says:

    I always check their sell by date.

  271. 271
    Tee Hee, hee says:

    This is effing hilarious.

    The night of the long knives — even the dates align.

    “He had a picture of MacMillan on the wall — that’s all you need to know” — said Dominic Cummings recently, of Cameron.

    This fantasist runs Britain? Wouldn’t last a year in the private sector.

  272. 272
    closet queen says:

    I’m so far back in the cabinet I could be called the Queen Of Narnia.

  273. 273

    Dulce et decorum est, pro patria mori.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  274. 274
    non taxable pikey says:

    That’s very Rich about Duncan, Marc my words.

  275. 275
  276. 276
    You must be joking says:

    Watched it, after the thousand years of our laws being honed and changed, our law is not good enough for this one guy thinks his law should be a law in his 1400 year behind the times brain that rules

  277. 277
    Shooty* says:

    Oh, Jesus, Dave determined to lose the election by replacing passable people with talentless window dressing. FFS.

  278. 278
    You must be joking says:

    So even woman bishops can’t cover, Camoron getting rid of all the trash.

  279. 279
    Jack the Ripper says:

    Does Dave have Merkel’s permission for this reshuffle?

  280. 280
    Owen Jones says:

    I can’t breathe.

  281. 281
    Ockham's Razor says:

    I can fly to Uranus from Newquay.

  282. 282
    Tee Hee, hee (p.s.) says:

    And that’s only because it’s so hard to sack employees these days.

    Wouldn’t have lasted a week in the private sector in MacMillan’s day.

  283. 283
    Kitty says:

    Bring the family

  284. 284
    visibly shaken says:

    fock off

  285. 285
    Socialism = Starvation says:

    Richmond no longer claims a Great Officer of State as its MP, as it did with Leon Brittan and William Hague. What is become of this town?

  286. 286
    Fill in the blanks says:

    Bonfire of the …….

  287. 287
    Enoch says:

    Leeds Far East by the look of it.

  288. 288
    Juncker says:

    I, not Frau Merkel, call the shots.

  289. 289
    Ad hock says:

    P was useless!

  290. 290
    'Moderate' Muslim says:

    We invite William Vague to walk the talk and come and help us fight in Benghazi

  291. 291
    Anonymous says:

    Hague is out then………..

  292. 292
    Rhodes Boys On says:

    Ester McPIE?

  293. 293
    William Hague says:

    I am leaving parliament in order to redouble my commitment to international causes that I believe in, such as sniffing Angelina Jolie’s farts.

  294. 294
    The seeds of our current predicament says:

    Was MacMillan fagged to Buggery at prep school ?

  295. 295
    Ad hock says:

    Foot and mouth.

  296. 296
  297. 297
    Ad hock says:

    Gotta have a whipping boy somewhere,,,,,,

  298. 298
    This mans judgement is utter shit says:

    Has Cameron culled himself yet ?

  299. 299
    rick says:

    When you look at the pathetic scum that has been ‘leading’ this country over the last few decades it makes me want to weep.
    Can a civil war be that much worse?

  300. 300

    I think Clegg gets to call the shots re Cable.

    But since you mention him, and his brief is Business. I would refer you to this excellent slideshow and allow you to ponder whether he has a clue how things work these days:

    http://www.slideshare.net/yiibu/the-emerging-global-web

    Please do move beyond the first dozen slides, they put into context all that follows.

  301. 301
    visibly shaken says:

    it is right for women to be given positions of power in the country.

    and it is right for them to be given no time to effect any kind of change with that power.

  302. 302
    Ed Miliweird says:

    I like sniffing women.

  303. 303
    Anonymous says:

    Channel 4′s TV show Dispatches undercover filming in a Blackburn Islamic school have revealed more instances of extremism by the schools Islamist staff. The video shows staff talking about stoning gay people and banning music, while clapping, whistling and neck ties are branded “Satanic”.
    In today’s society leftists and do gooders have managed to make political correctness a major part of daily life. Yet Muslims for some reason don’t think that this applies to the for some reason.
    There should be no place in British schools for extremism of any kind. Young children look up to teachers and take on board the things the teachers tell them as they are there to learn as the teachers are there to teach. With radical views such as these being past on to Muslim children is it any wonder the UK has so many Muslim problems. British born terrorists, wonnabe jihadists, lack of integration and a Muslim r@pe wave when kids are having these kind of views pushed on them

  304. 304
    Dave's feminine side says:

    So Dave is trying out his all wimin B squad for the final 10 minutes.

  305. 305
    Anonymous says:

    Just waiting for useless dave, the one like blair, that marches his troops to the top of the hill, never puts up a fight, just gets outgunned(Merkel,Juncker), to sack himself and get replaced with a real tory. But I guess he’ll carry on replacing his sacked colleagues with more liberals.

  306. 306
    a taxpayer says:

    Shut these schools down immediately.

  307. 307
    Unturning Stones says:

    Making room for even bigger nonces.

  308. 308
    Jimmy says:

    The night of the long peashooters…

  309. 309
    Leon Brittan says:

    George Robertson and myself run a discrete self-help group for politicians who for no reason at all make a unexpected exit from politics. Lines are open now.

  310. 310
    The British media are cunts says:

    Has Ed Milimong resigned yet?

  311. 311

    IDS does nt resign till midnight when the garlic the cross and the pointed wooden stakeare safely asleep ..

  312. 312
    Tory Watch says:

    Dave should have sacked Cameron and replaced him with May.

  313. 313
    Jimmy says:

    Will Incapable Vince and IDS be allowed to avoid the dole queue?
    Will Shapps be trusted to lead HMS Tory into the election?
    Will Jeremy Hunt be allowed to hide behind a tree to avoid being sacked?

  314. 314
    Anonymous says:

  315. 315
    Satanic white male says:

    Political correctness and Islam are both religions, and both do harm, though of course the latter does far more.

  316. 316
    Peter Bottomley says:

    She has a certain willowy, boyish attractiveness. Just needs her front teeth knocked out.

  317. 317
    Jimmy says:

    Think Ed’s doing pretty well with Cameron’s help.

  318. 318

    Why are you surprised ?
    Have you known him biblically ?

  319. 319
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Willy Bum Vague was just about the only decent politician in the tory party , i was rather hoping he would challenge “Do Nowt Dave for the leadership after next years election humiliation

    Why has he not got rid of the totally fucking useless and criminally insane Theresa May ?
    Or even that Dead fish eyed mad man Jeremy C u n t
    Even George “never had a real job” Osborne wouldn’t be missed

  320. 320
    Lancashire Fiscal says:

    Forget the Here Today, Gone Tomorrow politicos. Telegraph is reporting Sir Bob Kerslake sacked,

  321. 321
    William Hague says:

    I will never reveal the contents of the dawn meeting I had with Leon Brittan on Brighton beach.

  322. 322
    You must be joking says:

    Liebour politicians don’t resign, they get sidestepped and a few months later they are up to the same tricks.

  323. 323
    non taxable pikey says:

    Not just Islamic Schools but also ultra-orthadox hassids and Creaationist Christian Schools as well. All shown in the programme.
    Has the Education Minister quit yet?

  324. 324

    SLEEPLESS ON CLAPHAM COMMON SAYS

    Did soneone call ? — Ron Jones here .

  325. 325
    P l e b says:

    Maybe Cameron’s bringing back Andrew Mitchell and Liam Fox and his Werrity.

  326. 326
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    How many Glib Dumbs has he got rid of ?
    or is he scared they will end his coalition

    Wanker !

  327. 327
    Iain Duncan Smith says:

    Bring back Harvey Proctor.

  328. 328
    You must be joking says:

    It’s who he has to replace these people, tomorrow is another day and another comment.

  329. 329
    Alastair Campbell tweet says:

    “Maybe Cameron could put one of his sacked ministers in charge of this Butler Sloss inquiry?”

    William Hague would be my choice

  330. 330
    Fishy says:

    But it’s not extremist. What is being described is a cultural norm.

    On the day of the report into the ‘Trojan Horse’ schools one teacher (of British origin) was asked why her school did not have dance and movement on the timetable.

    She replied, it wasn’t, the timetable reflected the culture of the local community.

    The dozy bint, just didn’t get it…she was a fully signed up pig ignorant adherent to multiculturalism squad. Not understanding for one minute that the left’s version of multiculturalism, and she, was condemning the kids, to who she was supposed to deliver enlightenment, to life in a primitive cultural ghetto.

  331. 331

    Willuam will have a lot more time to enjoy the sounds of Meatloaf on his earphones .

    “Two out of Three –that s sad ”

    “I would do anything for love — including that !”

    ” Heaven CAN T wait”

    ” Like a sailor to a …. sailor” etc

  332. 332
    The British media are cunts says:

    I see the lefties are wetting themselves over Malala demanding the release of those schoolgirls.

    Yet another useless lefty wankfest, the only thing that would make it worse would be the presence of the one eyed mong.

  333. 333

    Is Maria Miller Deputy PM yet?

  334. 334
    Are Black people proportionaly more likely to be invited into the HoC? says:

  335. 335
    Jimmy says:

    Hague
    Brittan
    Dolphin Square

    Geddit?

  336. 336

    Get your Thelonius Monks off my turntablr !!

  337. 337
    visibly shaken says:

    I understand you being bothered about the teachings of jihad and stoning of gays and the r.a.p.e. of women being taught in Trojan schools across the land because one day it might effect you if you are a woman or gay.

    I don’t understand why you object to those who want to be taught creationism being taught that. It doesn’t effect anybody else.

    I would understand if you objected to the teaching of climate change in schools however. There is more fact in scientology than the science of climate change.

  338. 338
    Jimmy says:

    The whole corrupt edifice is crumbling before our very eyes.

  339. 339
    Spineless Cameron says:

    “The ministers really don’t matter.” WRONG.

    Owen Paterson was the right man in the right job. Handled the Horsemeat scandal superbly. Hanlded the Somerset floods scandal superbly. THEY are the reasons he was sacked. HE WAS COMPETENT AT HIS JOB (plus he pissed of the watemelons).

  340. 340
    non taxable pikey says:

    Highly amusing. Have a cole of Likes for that one.

  341. 341
    Fuck off you bald cunt says:

  342. 342
    Fffffffion says:

    Good riddance to Hague though. He showed great promise and potential yet failed miserably. I hope Dave doesn’t put Hague’s wrestling Chum Coe in charge of the BBC.

  343. 343
    non taxable pikey says:

    Couple, blasted ipads!

  344. 344

    What about Penny Dreadnaunt and Dave Davis?

    She could take over at Home Office from Crocodile Shoes

    He could be the new Minister without Portfolio i e Dave s Minder.

    Sorry I cannot proffer any Libdems — there s not one woman who s a looker and one man who is intelligent among them.

  345. 345
    Fuck off you bald cunt says:

    Ha, ha, ha, ha ha, ha, ha ha, ha, ha ha, ha, ha ha, ha, ha

    Give my love to Leon….

  346. 346
    Bradgelina says:

    Hope I didn’t cause yer downfall, willy.

  347. 347
    Church of England RIP says:

    Saw a bunch of wimmin priests on the BBC getting pissed and punching the air now they are able to be Bishops in the CofE. Should I convert to Islam?

  348. 348
    constituency trainbound says:

    sorry to see hague departing as FS … hammond not half the diplomat

  349. 349
  350. 350
    Bradgelina says:

    Hey willy, who gonna look after a girl now? Ham an, hammer on, ham and?

  351. 351
    Didn't stop Hague going native though says:

  352. 352
    Stars in his eyes says:

  353. 353
    Tachybaptus says:

    Corrupt as the edifice may be, I think you underestimate its strength. And the tottering tower of toxic waste that would replace it if your lot got in defies the most lurid description. Even the socialists I know say that Miliband makes them despair and Balls makes them gag.

  354. 354
    Jimmy says:

    Cameron expunging all connections to Thatcher, the peedofile’s friend?

  355. 355
    You must be joking says:

    We may have version 3 after May 2015 happening, version one was 2010, Brown still no show and is getting paid, surely the lefty powers that be should be asking why?, after all it’s mostly money from the ordinary workers that you lot say you represent.

  356. 356
    Fishy says:

    No I don’t geddit.

    Can you expand on your innuendo please. Full details (names, dates, evidence witnesses) with be sufficient.

    PS: You might want to give your Brief a quick call after you provide the detail.

    PPS: And if you can’t put up, shut up.

  357. 357
    Piece of shit Watch says:

    Hunt twat Alistair McGowan just congratulated the England team for reaching the World cup quarter finals.

    The Hunt obviously didn’t get the correct worldcup script.

  358. 358
    Tachybaptus says:

    Couple of what? Can’t find comment. And surely you can turn predictive text off, even on a we-control-uPad.

  359. 359
    visibly shaken says:

    my appraisal would be 9 out of 10 for effort but 4 out of 10 for achievement.

    his main mistake was thinking the NFU has any competent staffers.

    they couldn’t arrange a badger cull despite farmers liking nothing better than killing anything.

  360. 360
    Fishy says:

    Hurrah.

    The ECHR apologist, Grieve, gone

    The Head of the obstacle that is the Civil Service, Kerslake, gone

  361. 361
    Fishy says:

    Not Mitchel until he sorts out the P l e b lie

  362. 362
    Tachybaptus says:

    I say, we have been dipping our fangs in the vinegar bowl tonight, haven’t we?

  363. 363
    Jimmy Tarbuck says:

    I heard that, after signing their sponsorship deal with Newcastle United, Wog.na complained that the players weren’t giving it 15900% every match

  364. 364
    Jimmy says:

    Just asking, Ducky.

  365. 365
    Fishy says:

    He can’t touch the Lib Dems…their quota was part of the Coalition Agreement and any appointments concerning the drag anchor that are the Yellows is for Cleggy to deal with.

  366. 366
    Fred Karno says:

    Amazing that the 2 most incompetent havent got a mention yet …. May and Smith….

    still i suppose competence isnt a major concern in Government.

  367. 367
    Jimmy Tarbuck says:

    I heard that, after signing their sponsorship deal with Newcastle United, Wonga complained that the players weren’t giving it 15900% every match

  368. 368
    Anonymous says:

    + 1 Million

  369. 369
    Jimmy Tarbuck says:

    Church of England – the Tory party at prayer.

    Wonga – the Tory party at work

  370. 370
    Fruitcake, swivel eyed loon, closet racist, crank and gadfly says:

    Tories galore sacked ‘standing down’ or retiring to spend more time with their pensions.

    Meanwhile the Limp Dumbs escape, so far, unscathed.

    What has Clegg got on the spineless one?

  371. 371
    The late Brian Sewell is not dead yet says:

    You are probably not worth suing. SC probably is. Learn.

  372. 372
    Tachybaptus says:

    Call me anything, but not a duck.

  373. 373
    Nigella Fromage says:

    “Ukip support plummets to push Tories back into the lead
    Poll shows Tories picking up majority of deserters as Farage’s party drops back into single figures, with Labour on 33%”

  374. 374
    Santiago says:

    I’ll be right there.

  375. 375
    Jimmy says:

    Grebey didn’t work…

  376. 376
    David Cameron says:

    they’ll be shot at dawn in front of their families.

  377. 377
    Top Advice. Do not share your vino says:

  378. 378
    Ed Bollocks says:

    Labour will help him immensley

  379. 379
    Rinka Scott says:

    So Haigh has made the same move as Howe and Cook before him.

    Just think about it.

    He could have stayed in the FO until next May,cut the overseas travel and helped the Election campaign before leaving.

    Now he as a grey white middle aged man can only argue the Tory cause before the Electorate.

  380. 380
    Labour says:

    Nick Hurd, son of the former foreign secretary Lord Hurd of Westwell, is standing down as minister for civil society. Hurd tweeted: “there is no possibility of achieving a civil society under David Cameron”

  381. 381
    A non says:

    We will read it all here first. Unless we read it somewhere else first. In which case, we will read it there. Do keep up, Guido…

  382. 382
    And about time too says:

  383. 383
    MI5 says:

    Hague knows where the bodies are buried

  384. 384
    Let it sink says:

  385. 385
    Stop Sharia Now says:

    Stop Sharia Now or suffer the consequences.

    The people have the will to stop but our legislators don’t.

  386. 386
    Anonymous says:

    Send it to Chris Spivey. He isn’t afraid to publish.

  387. 387
    Open Bottle, Open Mind says:

    Drink it by yourself. Good advice!

  388. 388
    F##k the LibLabCon says:

    So our politicians are now chosen based on their gender alone, and our police force are chosen based on they race. It would appear the idea of choosing folk based solely on their abilities has been totally abandoned by Dave.

  389. 389
    will.i.am says:

    Share it with your martial arts coach

  390. 390
    Printing Money is Good for You says:

    They’re learning from us – print money is the only answer!

  391. 391
    Glendashaggem. says:

    First we had Blair’s Babes – now we have Cameron’s Cuties.

    Next year I suppose we’ll have Miliband’s Muppets.

  392. 392
  393. 393
    Moussa Koussa's pet meerkat says:

    Titanic sailing tonight and the tories are jumping ship before it hits the iceberg next May

  394. 394
    Don't Mention the F Word says:

    You forgot to add an innocent face.

  395. 395

    Looks like Dave is going to be in need of a fresh butter knife after all that cutting tonight: If he asks Jean Claude nicely, he may lend him a newish one.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  396. 396
    Chloe Smith, Youth Friendly (sic) MP says:

    It’s much safer on TV now that Paxo’s gone.

  397. 397
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    Vote Ukip, get Labour. Only a traitor would lumber this country with Len McCluskey’s puppet.

  398. 398
    A Right Fucking Bastard says:

    Who gives a fucking shit?

    Most of the fucking inbred fucking Taffs I’ve ever encountered hate English people for the crime of being, errr, English.

    Do one you fucking sheepshagging mong.

  399. 399
    RuffandReddy says:

    I see he didn’t sack that David Laws. I wonder why?
    St. Vince is still hanging on by his fingernails.
    Cleggy is still in a stupor I suppose.
    What a fg crowd.

  400. 400
    Max Clifford's press secretary says:

    Blimey are they Quaare ?

  401. 401
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    The only people who vote Ukip are those who don’t understand the voting system. Under FPTP a vote for Labour is a vote for Len McCluskey’s puppet, Ed Balls as chancellor and your savings and mine flushed down the toilet.

  402. 402

    It looks like those who have been targeted most heavily by R’ussia’s active measures have been finally cut loose, some may yet be charged and prosecuted for actual wrong doing, until convicted all are innocent.

    But, does this press the reset on P’utin’s efforts, or simply allow Dave to move a wrecking crew in ?

    Still not convinced that Dave is really on the square.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  403. 403
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    That would be rather stupid.

  404. 404
    Piece of shit watch says:

    It’s why I emigrated to New Zealand.

    Come here, you are most welcome…unless you are a blick.

  405. 405

    Vote UKIP, Get UKIP and less Labour :-D

  406. 406
    LezzeeLil says:

    Is that nice Eric Pickles still hanging in there? Minister for weight watchers?
    He’d make 2 of those new wimmin.

  407. 407
    a taxpayer says:

    Does ‘foreigners’ include those from
    within the EU?

  408. 408
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    Vote Ukip, let Labour destroy the country.

    The only sensible way top vote is to vote for the party best placed to stop Labour in your seat. Ukip couldn’t organise a piss-up in a brewery let alone win a by-election. They won’t have any seats post 2015.

    Stop Labour.

  409. 409
    Anonymous says:

    What’s work?

  410. 410
  411. 411
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    Don’t vote Ukip, stop Labour instead.

  412. 412
    Inspectorblog says:

    Jersey, Barnes, Isle of Wight, Morocco, Scotland………………

  413. 413
  414. 414
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    Ukip could not organise a piss-up in a brewery. Vote to stop Labour instead.

  415. 415
    POMKI says:

    Bet I got here before you

  416. 416
    Gordon Broon says:

    Anyone sacked yet who went to Eton?

  417. 417
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    Cannot win a mid-term by-election, no hope of getting a single MP. Vote to stop Labour instead.

  418. 418
    Terminology says:

    So what is the difference between

    “sacked”
    “Quits”
    “stands down” and
    “is out”

    ?

  419. 419
    You must be joking says:

    Vote UKIP or get Liebour, your choice.

  420. 420
  421. 421
    Makes total sense says:

    Yes. They will be billed 125%, which their country should pay.

  422. 422
  423. 423

    Vote UKIP – Stop Labour.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  424. 424
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    Another Labour troll. Under PR Ukip might be worth a vote but not under our voting system. As it stands, voting Ukip just lets Len McCluskey’s puppet in.

  425. 425
    Must try harder says:

    I reckon UKIP could organise a brilliant piss-up
    in a brewery.

  426. 426
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    Vote Ukip, get Labour and see if you have any savings or investments or pension pot left after 5 years. Vote for the party best placed to stop Labour and you might have a future where you’re not dependent upon the state.

  427. 427
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    They couldn’t win a by-election in a rotten borough and couldn’t organise a piss-up in a brewery.

    Hopeless. Try again, Labour troll…

  428. 428
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    Vote Ukip, get Labour.

  429. 429

    R’ussia / S’cotland ties are quite old and deep.

    They even share the same patron saint.

    The Texas Op lists were very seriously compromised. It should have been figured out back then that R’ussia had completely compromised many areas of security in both UK and US – particularly as they had access to both credit card and personal details of certain folk.

    Standard active-measures – but was Op Ore really set up to flush that R’ussian operation / agents out in spite of its actual advertised purpose ? That would more explain the lengthy seals than just covering up a few dodgy folk.

    Must have harvested a lot, perhaps.

    Real question is how many of those convicted whilst it was running were genuinely guilty.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  430. 430
    Bag says:

    Is that dumb Anna Soubry in line for promotion?
    She is fucking thick as a bag of pig shit,

  431. 431
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    Too toxic to win a seat.

  432. 432

    Not Labour Troll – EU – Like it says on the tin.

    Thank you :-)

    Vote UKIP :-D

  433. 433
    Bob Rusk says:

    Geeds wets himself when there’s a reshuffle. Meanwhile, in the real world, no one gives a shit … just one set of dickheads replacing another set of dickheads.

  434. 434
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    It’s FPTP in the UK. If you vote Ukip you get Labour.

  435. 435
    Billy Boy says:

    Off back to working for McKinsey for me. They’ll find out about me and the pig farmer its only a matter of time.

  436. 436
    Say no to tinfoil says:

    The esteemed Exaro, before it recently donned a tinfoil hat which I sincerely hope they remove urgently, helped to prove that this allegation against Clarke is false. Google that.

  437. 437

    UKIP is the cure – just don’t look down :-)

    Vote UKIP :-D

  438. 438
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Spoon face Camermong seems to have gone ever so quiet on his backing for the Arab spring up risings which he supported to the hilt last year

  439. 439
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    Ukip trolls ARE Labour.

  440. 440
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    Vote Ukip, get Labour.

  441. 441
    Bloomers in rain-soaked Bongo Bongo Land says:

    Don’t be daft.

  442. 442
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    If I should die, think only this of me…

    Vote to stop Labour.

  443. 443
    Ed Dafty, LimpDim MP, Climate Change Chieftain says:

  444. 444
    A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

    So vote Labour then and see where that gets you.

  445. 445
    Esther the Jester says:

    My involvement with the McCanns was brief and superficial – I was simply their media spokesperson and advisor. I have studiously avoided mentioning them since.

  446. 446
    David Minibanana says:

  447. 447
    Mystic Mog says:

    Sacked= Sacked
    Quits= offered a terrible alternative job/demotion so decides against it.
    Stands down= similar to quits.
    Is out= Nick Cook

  448. 448
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Has Vince DespiCable the biggest parliamentary fuck up of the last 100 years , been sacked yet for losing the taxpayers a BILLION pounds and still (while blaming every one and everything else )denies royal mail was sold on the cheap
    What an incompetent twat he is

  449. 449
    Tick, Tock says:

    What’s wrong with addressing an immigrant community in their native tongue after they’ve decided they can’t be bothered to learn English properly despite being established here for over 50 years?

  450. 450
    David Axlegrease says:

    The Labour manifesto is leaked.

  451. 451

    No – They need the Eurozone weak so as Citizen’s feel economically vulnerable otherwise the propaganda claiming that the US wishes to enslave Europeans – needed in order to advance some of the pan-Europa agenda – will not have any credibility, hence fail.

    The US for it’s part is acting in such a way that any such claim by Europe’s leaders would get laughed out of even the Prime-Mentalist’s Bierkeller.

    So – Europe is going to be poor, and sulky.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  452. 452
    Sucker says:

  453. 453
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Jobs should go to the best candidate for the job , not just because they are a woman
    Cameron pandering to the Labour party yet again
    No fuckin bottle Dave thats your problem !

  454. 454
    Anonymous says:

    What is Camerons policy on the Ukraine, Israel?

    The EU runs our foreign policy now. Schweinhund!

  455. 455
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Breaking news !

    Diane Abbott found stuck to a cake shop window in Brixton

  456. 456

    Unless you have seen those lists, how do you know those lists were the original lists. And who exactly faxed them ?

    White, Grey or Black sourcing ?

    Think Active Measures.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  457. 457
    Jimmy says:

    Cashcroft’s errand boy out of the FCO?

    Interesting.

  458. 458
    Diane Abbo says:

    No, Camermong should *raise* the higher level of taxes to 75% at 10pm on election day.

    Let millimong have to explain to the bedwetters why income tax for the “millionaires” needs to be cut.

  459. 459
    Covering up chold abuse is a criminal offence. Doing so whilst a judge is an aggr says:

    Baroness Butler-Sloss should be jailed.

  460. 460
    I. Rony says:

    It has been shown that women are of equal value in police work, fire fighting and military action. So he should have no problem in finding 12 or so women who will be top rank cabinet ministers.

  461. 461
    S. R. Casm says:

    No, you should adopt a sensible philosophical position.

  462. 462
    Jimmy the Dhimmi says:

    Whatever happened to Tony B£iar’s errand boy, Lord Cashpoint ?

  463. 463
    Bob Rusk says:

    I’ll be voting UKIP, thank you very much. You’re constant Tory trolling has no effect on me.

  464. 464
    Amazed says:

    ” Minister for Civil Society ” Seriously ? Hopefully won’t be replaced.

  465. 465
    A Badger says:

    Result!

  466. 466
    Jimmy says:

    Do you just hit keys at random?

  467. 467
    Tachybaptus says:

    Come, come, Jimmy. You’ve been lashing out in all directions like a dying octopus all evening.

  468. 468

    A dude named Clint just gave me a hint,
    He say jus’ Kick those GoodOldBoys to the kerb,

    Now it’s time for a change, the Cabinet to ReArrange,
    MamasNets really really want some GirlPower.

    McScouse, Liz Trust, Pretty Ethnic and the Crew,
    Thatchers Babes will get more voters changing to Blue.

    With Da Fox in the Henhouse, You’ll have no fear
    So take a chill pill an Calm Down Dear!

  469. 469
    Jack Ketch says:

    Does that make them High Priestess’s?

  470. 470
    Jack Ketch says:

    Someone has to do the typing.

  471. 471
    Professor Green says:

    Paterson had to go. He had no understanding of his brief particularly in relation to the importance of developing green energy to ensure energy independence.

    TTT Typical Tory Tw*t

  472. 472

    I thought Garfield had blacked up and put on a few pounds.

    Thanks for clarifying.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  473. 473

    Vote UKIP or Vote ISIS.

    The choice is yours.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  474. 474
    Jimmy says:

    There are those among you who believe that merely by using the name Jimmy some of the magic will rub off on you. Despite all evidence to the contrary you’re not giving up are you?

  475. 475
    Start the paedo inquiry by investigating all the resigning ministers says:

    You might as well assume they’re all at it. Its what these public schools and oxford toffs drinking clubs do for a pastime – bugger the young’uns.

  476. 476
    Actually says:

    Lots of victims DID go to the police with names, addresses, dates and details. And the fuzz were told by the government to back off.

    P.S. Got something to hide?

  477. 477
    Whale oil be damned says:

    More to the point, will they all acquire Bishopricks? :-)

  478. 478
    Broom and dust says:

    Slaphead outed.

  479. 479
    Whale oil be damned says:

    Not for more than a day or two. That one won’t go away any time soon.

  480. 480
    Whale oil be damned says:

    Never mind. Wonderwoman Ashtray will get it all sorted out by teat time.

  481. 481
    Whale oil be damned says:

    ooops!! tea time. More milk , Vicar?

  482. 482
    Alan Hansen says:

    Cameron has transferred IDS to USHIT for an undisclosed fee

  483. 483
    Esther McVile is a CUNT says:

    I WON!!

  484. 484
    Esther McVey says:

    he’s a really lib dumb

    but if you fancy a little something I’m free at 9

  485. 485
    Esther McVey says:

    I’ve got nothing on, Dave …………….

  486. 486
    Esther McVey says:

    TELEVISION!!??????
    I don’t want television.!!
    I want the top job!!
    Now, Dave, get it right
    I’m very good ………. you know, like la

  487. 487
    albacore says:

    Doesn’t matter how much they shuffle shit
    Is there anyone left still buying it?
    The name on the door of this Parliament
    Needs changing to Houses of Excrement

  488. 488
    Sinister says:

    What about human lefts?

  489. 489
    Jeremy Hunt says:

    I have decided to have a “crackdown” and to charge immigrants 150% of the cost of their NHS treatment. This means 150% of the cost of treatment instead of 100% will remain uncollected. Vote Tory.

  490. 490
    The Poof in Residence says:

    It looks like the Cabinet will have more now with front bottoms…..Ugh ! Ugh !

  491. 491
    Colonel Mustard says:

    Only one organisation ever exposed the perverts in the establishment – we need to re-invent the News of the World the News. In the mean time we need an enquiry team of investigative journalists (with their police “sources”) led by an experienced editor on a mission.

  492. 492
    Cinna says:

    Bend over, you mean?

  493. 493
    Bye bye says:

    Nick Clegg out.

  494. 494
    Fishy says:

    Vince Incapcable

  495. 495
    That's not a Re-Shuffle... says:

    …that’s a Clean-Out!

  496. 496
    Inspector Knacker of the Yard says:

    What an extraordinary coincidence, all the names on that list of former minsters are on my list of middle-aged Tories to interview as part of Yewtree!

  497. 497
    The Very Lovely Alan Duncan says:

    Hear ! Hear !

  498. 498
    Dana says:

    I agree

  499. 499

    He was the only one of them on top of his brief

  500. 500
    bergen says:

    Never thought I’d agree with Jimmy.

  501. 501
    Must try harder says:

    Me neither.
    Every time you state the predictable
    bollocks-a vote for UKIP is a vote for
    Labour-it strengthens my resolve to
    vote UKIP.

  502. 502
    Exit the Mekon says:

    Best place to hide a body is on a battlefield.

  503. 503
    Dyno-Rod Dave says:

    IDS to stay at DWP – because he knows where the bodies are – he killed them all

  504. 504
    visibly shaken says:

    spot on with green energy policy.

    less free money for farmers.

    only problem was he didn’t kill enough badgers for my liking. but that was down to NFU incompetence really.

  505. 505
    oh dear says:

    July 15-3.30am.
    Jimmy finally disappeared up his own arsehole.

  506. 506
    Grant Shapps says:

    Are the four most talented people in the Tory party really Hammond, May Osborne and Cameron? We’re doomed!

  507. 507
    Jimmy the Dhimmi says:

    We all know what you’re rubbing off. No-one wants any of ‘the magic’. YEEEUUGGHH !

  508. 508
    REALITY CHECK says:

    Compare and contrast with the Labour ‘stars':

    Miliband, Balls,Harmanhater and Reeves.

    Will the last person to leave turn out the lights ?

  509. 509
    Exit the Mekon says:

    Yes this is the constituency in which I reside, thinking of starting a ‘I like full grown women’ party, think I might just get in considering the mood in the town.

  510. 510
    Ed & Ed says:

    Vote us for free money!

  511. 511
    Owen Jones says:

    Does anyone know how to get a cum stain off a mattress?Only Ikea are threatening to make me buy it.

  512. 512
    perv alert says:

    We don’t want to play with your conjuring stick.

  513. 513
    Swivel Eyed Lefty Tree Hugger says:

    Its a social construct invented by the out of touch rich baby eating Tories.

  514. 514

    Simply tell your GP to go and fuck himself , half a bottle of wine is not nearly enough , I prefer at least five or six pints of Old Peculier and a large rum as a nightcap.

  515. 515
    You must be joking says:

    They can’t throw you in jail yet for having a suspicious mind, but I was thinking the same sort of why?= throwing toys out of pram, nah politics= minister=fame=invites=lots and lots of money, if you live high on the hog you have to keep it up and that takes money, it’ll all come out after the whitewash fades and they think people have forgotten.

  516. 516
    Exit the Mekon says:

    It’s my breasts you see, I’am really after a a 38D.

  517. 517
    Voting UKIP says:

    Are Dave’s replacements Old Etonians in drag?

  518. 518
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    Patterson is now in prime position to be the stalking horse, in the Autumn, when the 1922 committee come for Cameron’s head, unless the Tories have a 15 point lead over Labour :-)

  519. 519
    You must be joking says:

    Surly your moniker should be “REALITY SHOCK”

  520. 520
    Observer says:

    Sadly no. All the incompetent civil servants are still in place.

  521. 521
    Anonymous says:

    Lies lies and statistics.

  522. 522
    Anonymous says:

    Whatever it is it is certainly not good for you, otherwise the rich bastards would keep it all for themselves.

  523. 523
    inside out says:

    Unless he has a cull of Whitehall Civil servants nothing will change.They run the country,they implement Brussels dictates, changing the mouthpiece doesn’t change the message.

  524. 524
    F S Trueman says:

    In cricket when a senior batsmen wants to retire he tells his Captain in private and carries on to the end of the season.

    He doesn’t just drop everything mid season to captain the second eleven and write a book.

  525. 525
    an awkward bastard says:

    Someone has just said Cameron has booted Gove because he is more of a liability than an asset.

    What about all the others leaving I ask myself.

  526. 526

    It would appear that your Prime Minister has been carrying more liabilities than RBS for the last four years if we listen to you.

  527. 527
  528. 528
    Speke the truth says:

    …………yet.

  529. 529
    Bob cuntface Crow says:

    Henry V wouldn’t have won Agincourt without all them brave Polish and Romanian archers.

  530. 530
    Anonymous says:

    “Hague Out”
    But there’s no need to sign-on. Judging by clips of his conference performances as a precocious child, and comical latter efforts. A future career in panto, with the Krankies, beckons.

  531. 531
    It takes a cunt to appoint a cunt says:

    Dave’s been surrounded by tits for years.

  532. 532
    Bob cuntface Crow says:

    Burn them to the fucking ground ,kids, teachers govnors, halal serving dinner ladies,mustafa sweep the caretaker, the fucking lot.

  533. 533
    Anonymous says:

    Ever the sportsman, Cameron is doing his best to make Miliband seem competent.

  534. 534
  535. 535
    richardrich says:

    Surely that Twat Ian Duncan Smith must go?

  536. 536
    Bonar Law says:

    No, Guido, NOT “a Downing Street spokesperson”. You mean, “a Downing Street SPOKESMAN” – the grammatically correct generic term. Cut out the asinine political correctness.

  537. 537
    surlyscot says:

    At least that gurning garden knome HAIG has gone, thank christ, sick of listening to his whining nasal rant.


Seen Elsewhere

Stop May Pact | Times
Wake Up Call For Capitalists | CapX
Guido’s Column | Sun
Dave Hoaxer High on Coke and Weed | Sun
Let’s Help the Kurds Fight | Boris
Split the Left | Tim Montgomerie
Liz Kendall For Leader | Indy
Bashir Booted Out By Respect | Respect
Americans Try Haggis | Guardian
Page 3 and the Art of the Self-Pity Statement | Guardian
Steven Woolfe For UKIP Leader? | Asa Bennett


Find out more about PLMR AD-MS


George Galloway says of his former Respect candidate the UKIP MEP turned Tory, Amjad Bashir…

“Clearly Bashir does not have any real political principles or commitment, only naked opportunism and self-interest. He represents the revolving door principle in politics. The Tories are welcome to him because he will cause them embarrassment. Fortunately Respect was able to act before he did it to us.”


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