July 14th, 2014

THE RESHUFFLE: All the Sackings as They Happen

22.52: You read it all here first:

A Downing Street spokesperson said:

The Prime Minister has accepted the resignations of the following Ministers:

- The Rt Hon Kenneth Clarke QC MP (Minister without Portfolio)
- The Rt Hon David Willetts MP (Minister of State, BIS)
- The Rt Hon Alan Duncan MP (Minister of State, DFID)
- The Rt Hon Hugh Robertson MP (Minister of State, FCO)
- The Rt Hon Sir George Young Bt MP, (Chief Whip and Parliamentary Secretary to the Treasury)
- The Rt Hon Andrew Robathan MP (Minister of State, Northern Ireland Office)
- The Rt Hon Gregory Barker MP (Minister of State, DECC)

10.15pm: Phillip Hammond will take over at FCO. Eurosceptic.

10:00pm: William Hague out as Foreign Secretary, he becomes Leader of the House and will stand down from parliament at the election.

10:00pm: Andrew Lansley sacked.

9:58pm: Stephen Crabb is the new Welsh Secretary.

9:28pm: Owen Paterson sacked as Environment Secretary.

9:07pm: Solicitor General Oliver Heald also leaving.

9.03pm: Greg Barker out of DECC and will quit parliament next year.

8:34pm: Attorney General Dominic Grieve leaves the government.

8:16pm: Transport minister Stephen Hammond out.

8:07pm: Police minister Damian Green sacked.

7:30pm: David Willetts quits, will leave parliament next year.

7:27pm: Nick Hurd stands down as Minister for Civil Society.

7:18pm: Northern Ireland Minister Andrew Robathan quits.

7:17pm: Development Minister Alan Duncan quits “at his own request”.

5:36pm: Ken Clarke quits as Minister Without Portfolio.

5:29pm: David Jones sacked as Welsh Secretary.

Developing…


537 Comments

  1. 1
    David Jones says:

    Never mind, I’m still a household name. At least in my own house; look you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. 2
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    Re-arranging the deck chairs on the Tory Titanic :-)

    Like

  3. 3
    NE Frontiersman says:

    Is Ken Clarke the new Minister for Children?

    Like

  4. 4
    lescrompsblogg says:

    The reshuffle shuffle, let the dance begin

    Like

    • 211
      Countdown says:

      I’m catching up on this, and eight gone so far — all male.

      Dave and PC cronies have taken fast-track course in window dressing.

      Won’t help, come the election.

      Like

  5. 5
    Whiffler says:

    Where did I go?

    Like

  6. 7
    Gerhard says:

    So Wales can sod right off in the eyes of Cameron – the first Welsh-speaking Welsh Secretary in decades is sacrificed on the altar of “equality”.

    Like

    • 12
      M­a­­q­bo­­ul says:

      Don’t think that’s the reason he was booted out. Most Welsh can’t speak Welsh but who’s to say that the next Welsh secretary isn’t a Welsh speaker as well, if not a women Welsh speaker?

      Like

      • 22
        Dafydd ap Gwilym says:

        Someone like John Redwood, you mean?

        Like

      • 26
        Welch are gits says:

        Look you, isn’t it, boyo.

        See, it really is not difficult to speak taff.

        Trying to find one that does not wave sticks at helicopters whilst shouting ‘Metal bird! Metal bird!’ Might be a bit trickier though.

        Hairy-palmed in-breds, mostly.

        Like

      • 36
        Gerhard says:

        Sacked to give the job to a woman.

        Given there are no female Conservative MPs representing Welsh constituencies, they’ll have to send one across the border.

        Like

      • 64
        NE Frontiersman says:

        ‘Most Welsh can’t speak Welsh ..’;
        Wales today, London tomorrow; Tower Hamlets, already.

        Like

      • 97
        Beers are on the new welsh secretary says:

        You don’t need to speak Welsh to be accepted in an authoritative position of telling the taffs what to do. Drinking copious amounts of beer, liquid lunches and buying your rounds are the sole requirements.

        Like

        • 120
          Welsh Secretary's secretary says:

          Being overweight, thick, assorted kids from different sperm, cheaply dressed, unkempt, gobby and skilless are also commonplace.

          Depressing really.

          Like

    • 398
      A Right Fucking Bastard says:

      Who gives a fucking shit?

      Most of the fucking inbred fucking Taffs I’ve ever encountered hate English people for the crime of being, errr, English.

      Do one you fucking sheepshagging mong.

      Like

      • 406
        LezzeeLil says:

        Is that nice Eric Pickles still hanging in there? Minister for weight watchers?
        He’d make 2 of those new wimmin.

        Like

  7. 8
    SwearyExpat says:

    Why do we even have a Welsh secretary?

    Like

    • 10

      Why has the sacking not been announced in Welsh ?

      Like

    • 16
      Dafydd ap Gwilym says:

      Because England still insists on the majority of law making for Wales

      Like

      • 20
        Abdel from Tooting says:

        I remember the Tories putting one of their Mps in Angelesey.

        That ended in tears when he went to jail for fiddling his applications on those undervalued IPOs Margaret Thatcher liked handing out.

        Like

        • 24
          Sheikh Basha Banka says:

          I remember the days of which you speak.

          At the time we were inundated in the Bank with applications for personal loans to enable people to fill their socks with shares in those national utilities.

          In most cases the applications were approved with little questioning because everyone realised the shares were one way bets.

          Happy days.

          Like

          • Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

            Except most privatisation share allocations to the public were massively limited due to being massively oversubscribed.

            Like

          • Sheikh Basha Banka says:

            If you were staff you could fill your boots with the allocations: you could not be scaled back.

            That is where the serious money was made.

            The idiot Tory in Ynys Mon was making multiple applications in false names !

            Like

        • 106
          Gosh says:

          Keith Best.

          He did some time and then re-emerged as Chief Exec of a huggy charity.

          Bless.

          Like

    • 195
      Blodwyn Welsh Secretary says:

      I’m a f^cking good secretary look you, go f^ck some sheep or something, bloody men!

      Like

    • 470
      Jack Ketch says:

      Someone has to do the typing.

      Like

  8. 9
    A Ship's Lawyer says:

    I am absolutely gutted at this news.

    Like

  9. 11
    Fishy says:

    Have the two Ed’s been sacked yet?

    Like

  10. 18

    Ken Clarke gone ? Sweet – But who gets to fill his shoes ?

    Is this Dave’s early evening of the butter knives ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

    Like

  11. 21
    IDS says:

    I’ll take anything, even Northern Ireland, to get away from the Universal Credit omnishambles

    Like

  12. 25
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    Will Davy Jones be emptying his locker :-)

    Like

  13. 27
    Dave's babes says:

    I’m safe! Because I’ll cry if I’m not promoted.
    Cry and claim sexism!

    And tell the papers Tory men are all pigss.
    So gimme a plum job. Even if I am thicker than a Harman-Abbott sandwich.

    Like

  14. 32
    Bill Quango MP says:

    This reshuffle on the day they get that sunken liner back upright.

    Some sort of parallel there…

    Like

  15. 43
    Bill Quango MP says:

    I know its a minority view but Ken Clarke should have been in the Treasury with Osbo.
    Not feckin’ justice where his softy softy approach is useless. Justice and Home need hard faced bastards.

    Treasury needed experience. Someone not to dumb to fall for the civil service saying “if you remove pasties from VAT exemption it will make our job an awful lot easier, Chancellor. And save quite a bit of cash too…”

    “Really how much?”

    “Oh…I dare say quite an amount..possibly, quite a sum…considering the amount of baked and reheated products on sale in the UK..yes..possibly a..erm..well..an amount!”

    “Great! Let’s do it!”

    Like

  16. 45
    The British media are cunts says:

    #bringbackourgirls

    Hey you dopey dykes how’s your Twatter campaign going then…….

    Like

  17. 48
    David 'balls of' Steel says:

    Couldn’t he sack Nick Clegg? The Lib Dems would vote for it!

    Like

    • 110
      time for another merger says:

      Who would replace Nick Clegg? The eligible pool is dwindling to hardly anything.

      Like

      • 153
        The Fucker says:

        You could always rip his balls off, paint eyes on them and attach them to a sock puppet. No fucker would notice.

        Like

      • 168
        Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

        Larry the cat :-)

        Like

    • 344

      What about Penny Dreadnaunt and Dave Davis?

      She could take over at Home Office from Crocodile Shoes

      He could be the new Minister without Portfolio i e Dave s Minder.

      Sorry I cannot proffer any Libdems — there s not one woman who s a looker and one man who is intelligent among them.

      Like

  18. 52

    Penelope Twiglet (Loamshire South) becomes Minister Without Handbag.
    Sid Sidhu (Poundland and Brighthouse) moves from Bubbleblowing to Loom Bands.
    Tarquin Monstermunch (Farrowball) becoes Secretary of State for Outreach.
    Deirdre Pineapple-Chunk (The Loathings) becomes Under-Secretary for Secretaries.
    Devon Token-Blackman (East Weston) becomes Blackboard Monitor (Communities).

    Like

  19. 54
    Jimmy says:

    “Ken Clarke quits”

    So no adult supervision then?

    Like

    • 86
      M­a­­q­bo­­ul says:

      No avuncular McCLuskey guiding hands in the conservative party. Is that a good thing? Yes, undoubtedly.

      Like

  20. 55
    Bill Quango MP says:

    I think, given the polls, there is only one thing to do.

    Get the missile keys out of the Treasury Bunker and go “Gordon” on the economy.

    Brown spent 10 years GDP in a single year. He increased the already huge UK debt by 100%. He actually spent more money than it cost to fight World War two. In a single year.

    He didn’t turn the taps on so much as rip the sink from the wall and smash the taps off with an iron bar.

    So…payback time.

    Cameron should cut the top rate of tax to 25p.
    And the lower rate to 5p.

    There you go! Instant success. Not enough to win the election but enough to give Miliboy the Liberals as his allies in a coalition with a wafer thin mint majority.

    Then let those cretins tell the public “We have to put up tax because ..erm..the Tories wrecked the economy”

    Dave , or whoever, can point, much as Labour do now, to the massive spending boom that they had engineered that was driving the economy.. he can say that the boom has, now , sadly been chocked off by Labour’s callous, inhuman tax rises.

    So the economy is ruined? So what?

    Dave can say
    “It was like this when we got here!”

    And he’d be right , too.

    Like

    • 60
      Taxpayer says:

      Cameron cut taxes? Dont make me laugh. He’s obsessed with high taxes and ludicrous marginal rates on those who want to get on.

      Like

    • 95
      Ockham's Razor says:

      Absolutely fucking brilliant example of combined strategic and tactical genius!

      Therefore they will never go for it.

      Like

      • 162
        Bert says:

        And to boost consumption, change the VAT rate to -20%. That’s right, when you spend £10 on VATable goods, the government sends you £2 … which you can spend in turn and receive another 40p.

        The economy would go off like my Aunt Maude when Uncle Julian finally discovered her clitoris.

        Like

        • 188
          Ed Milibandwagon says:

          That’s going in the manifesto!
          People will soon be spending so much they won’t need handouts.

          Like

    • 458
      Diane Abbo says:

      No, Camermong should *raise* the higher level of taxes to 75% at 10pm on election day.

      Let millimong have to explain to the bedwetters why income tax for the “millionaires” needs to be cut.

      Like

  21. 56
    White Dee says:

    Being elevated to a Life Peer and placed in charge of DWP was quite a surprise!

    But as Dave said, no-one knows more about claiming benefits than me.

    Like

  22. 57
    Taxpayer says:

    Who’s Minister for Punitive Tax Rates on the Middle Classes? Or is that all of them? Wankers.

    Like

  23. 62
    ukip.I.am says:

    Reshuffle? Sack every last one of them! Shower of bastards.

    Like

  24. 63
    Cameron Is A CUNT says:

    Home Office – not fit for purpose

    DWP – not fit for purpose

    No10 – not fit for purpose

    GET RID OF THE LOT OF THEM

    Like

    • 139
      Rumpboy says:

      We do think the Transmanche region has rather too many layers of government. We intend imposing direct rule from Bruxelles.

      Like

  25. 66

    Hopefully they get some big strong black politicians in *innocent face*

    Like

  26. 70
    Esther McVile is a CUNT says:

    Esther McVile here
    you boy, shut up whilst I am talking, like
    Now, I am the new leader of the government and you lot had better shape up, like
    Alright
    Get on with it and leave the spin to me

    Like

  27. 75
    Esther McVile is a CUNT says:

    Me again

    Anybody want a go?

    Like

  28. 77
    Bishop Bashar says:

    Tata Ken Clarke. About time of course, but another ‘proper’ politician gone to make way for Cameron’s plastic army

    Like

  29. 79
    Not in my name says:

    Slaughter of the Limp Dems.

    I hope

    Like

  30. 79
    Anonymous says:

    Well,well. The Labour Party stall.

    Like

  31. 81
    Esther McVile is a CUNT says:

    Do me …………. NOW

    Like

    • 109
      Reimer says:

      You’re a looker, Esther, and I’d be seriously tempted were it not for your ferocious Desperate Scousewives persona which would be more fitting on one of Labour’s wimmin.

      R

      Like

    • 292
      Rhodes Boys On says:

      Ester McPIE?

      Like

  32. 84
    P l e b says:

    The older moderate Tories are going to have to give way to extreme right wing “younger women”,like Priti Patel who wants to bring back capital punishment -hanging and Esther Mcvey etc. Cameron has decreed he wants more right wingers and women in the cabinet.

    Like

    • 113
      Reimer says:

      I take it “right wing” in this context means noisy enthusiasm for Thatchonomics, prefaced with a hashtag (cos they’re modern campaigning wimmin).

      Like

  33. 85
    Ed Balls, shallow chancellor says:

    So 8 sacked, 8 promoted, net change eleventy. Is that right?

    Like

  34. 87
    George Osborne says:

    I’m giving new powers to HMRC to come round and shag your missus.

    Like

  35. 88
    non taxable pikey says:

    I know it was due but can’t help thinking it will cover up the debacle of Butler Sloss.

    Like

  36. 91
    Grant Shapps says:

    Has Maria Miller been sacked yet?

    Like

  37. 94
    The poof in residence says:

    More and more bumsex, lovely jubbly.

    Like

  38. 96
    Jimmy says:

    Reshuffle update: DWP – Portfolio without Minister

    Like

  39. 98
    Lottie Dexter says:

    Well,fuck me slowly !

    Like

  40. 100
    The Sun Still Shines says:

    Ken jumped before he was pushed. :) Taffy Nonsense gone. :)

    Like

  41. 104
    Esther McVey says:

    Someone on here is trying to impersonate me, very badly I must say.
    However, if anyone is interested I would be very happy if you DID ME, NOW, SLOWLY then fuck off

    Like

  42. 105
    Owen Jones QC says:

    Mr Cameron is reshuffling the Cabinet. Mr Clegg is helping out by reshuffling the garden furniture in the Downing Street shed.

    Like

  43. 111
    The EU says:

    Have I been reshuffled yet?

    Like

  44. 115
    Reimer says:

    Ken will be spending more time down at Ronnie’s where his chortling tenor will make the Hushpuppies the greatest UK interpreters of Hard Bop known to Bilderprov.

    Like

  45. 116
    David Cameron says:

    Just like my dearest colleague Lady Butler-Shloss, I am not the right man for the job ……..

    Like

  46. 118
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    So Ken Clarke finally hangs up his hush puppies to spend more time with his jazz mags :-)

    Like

  47. 119
    Ockham's Razor says:

    The European Union in Crisis. The Geopolitics of Russia-EU Pipeline Corridors

    http://www.globalresearch.ca/the-european-union-in-crisis-the-geopolitics-of-eu-russia-pipeline-corridors/5391139

    Like

  48. 127
    eat my sausage says:

    Is the Minister Without Portfolio the one who makes sure all the files go missing?

    Like

    • 140
      for in hope than expectation says:

      Fucking genius if all MPs and those standing 2015 disappeared without trace.

      Like

  49. 128
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    After a quick five fingered shuffle , Dave has come up with a short list to replace Butler Sloshed as head of his enquiry
    Some of which might be otherwise disposed

    Sidney Cooke
    Rolf Harris
    Jimmy So vile
    Gary Glitter
    Stuart Hall
    Cyril Smith

    We must have a totally unbiased enquiry , with lots of stones left unturned
    The truth is out there , where it will remain

    Like

    • 138

      Whatever happened to roger Cook, the fat consumer investigator?

      Like

      • 150
        Roger says:

        I’m waiting by the phone, but I may be a bit past it too, like the shloshed butler.

        Like

      • 163
        Bumservative Party says:

        Didn’t someone once empty a bucket of shit over his head?

        I think Tom Jones would make a good candidate.

        Like

    • 491
      Colonel Mustard says:

      Only one organisation ever exposed the perverts in the establishment – we need to re-invent the News of the World the News. In the mean time we need an enquiry team of investigative journalists (with their police “sources”) led by an experienced editor on a mission.

      Like

  50. 130
    Jumbo says:

    Gonna be a restless evening of editorial inactivity for Guido, Spectator and others

    Like

    • 137
      Reimer says:

      Too right: this stuff is like the big character culls in soap operas, but deemed far more high minded for its occurring amid the charade known as “politics”, and avidly lapped up by the professional bumsniffers & wannabes.

      Like

  51. 132
    You must be joking says:

    Camoron lies prostrate in front of the alter equality for woman, no greasy poles , a big welcome on the door , come on in with no knowledge or experience and like all women drivers reverse into the garage door or park across 2 bays, god help us, no one else will .

    Like

  52. 134
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    UKIP and the other anti-EU parties can get all the sports fans throughout Europe onside by starting a massive campaign to save our national teams from the federalist monster of the United States of Europe.

    A USE will mean no more German,England,France or Italian football teams in the World Cup and no more European Championships in any sport.

    Only by leaving the EU can we preserve our national sports teams.

    Like

    • 144
      scot git says:

      I want to cheer on a winning team for once

      Like

    • 152
      You must be joking says:

      Why bother football supporters are too thick to notice things like that, all the EU has to do is drip feed it to them and like shellfish, the heat will get them first or even the swollows.

      Like

    • 173
      Confucious the Voter says:

      Croquet is to be granted Official EU Sport status, and member states will henceforth be required to provide unlimited statuary funding.

      Like

      • 176
        Confucious the Voter says:

        Statutory even.
        Should have gone to spec……

        Like

      • 183
        Tachybaptus says:

        No, that’s probably right. Gilded statues of Juncker, Rompuy, Barroso and the other criminals to be erected in every city centre. Death penalty for defacement.

        Like

  53. 142
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Dave is practicing his “Shuffle”

    Come next year he will need it to shuffle out the back door of No 10

    Like

  54. 146

    Sick of being treated like some dumb sheep as one London tosser after another gets sent he-ure, look you.

    Who next, …?

    Like

  55. 157
    Ockham's Razor says:

    I have never found a companion that was so companionable as solitude. We are for the most part more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers. A man thinking or working is always alone, let him be where he will. – Henry David Thoreau

    Goodbye Ken. As one door closes, another one slams shut.

    Vote UKIP :-D

    Like

    • 172
      Tachybaptus says:

      L’enfer, c’est les autres. — Jean-Paul Sartre

      Good riddance to the whole septic shower. Sadly, they will be replaced with others equally smelly.

      Like

    • 174
      Tachybaptus says:

      Oh fuck, mentioned Sartre’s second Christian name, got modded. Anyway, a pox on all the departing ministers, and also on their replacements.

      Like

      • 207
        Ockham's Razor says:

        They pronounce it ‘Pole’ anyway – strange chaps!

        L’Académie française – Crédit Lyonnais – don’t know which is worse.

        Like

    • 201

      Or perhaps a trap door has opened ?

      Vote UKIP :-D

      Like

      • 273

        Dulce et decorum est, pro patria mori.

        Vote UKIP :-D

        Like

        • 442
          A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

          If I should die, think only this of me…

          Vote to stop Labour.

          Like

      • 275
        • 402

          It looks like those who have been targeted most heavily by R’ussia’s active measures have been finally cut loose, some may yet be charged and prosecuted for actual wrong doing, until convicted all are innocent.

          But, does this press the reset on P’utin’s efforts, or simply allow Dave to move a wrecking crew in ?

          Still not convinced that Dave is really on the square.

          Vote UKIP :-D

          Like

        • 429

          R’ussia / S’cotland ties are quite old and deep.

          They even share the same patron saint.

          The Texas Op lists were very seriously compromised. It should have been figured out back then that R’ussia had completely compromised many areas of security in both UK and US – particularly as they had access to both credit card and personal details of certain folk.

          Standard active-measures – but was Op Ore really set up to flush that R’ussian operation / agents out in spite of its actual advertised purpose ? That would more explain the lengthy seals than just covering up a few dodgy folk.

          Must have harvested a lot, perhaps.

          Real question is how many of those convicted whilst it was running were genuinely guilty.

          Vote UKIP :-D

          Like

        • 456

          Unless you have seen those lists, how do you know those lists were the original lists. And who exactly faxed them ?

          White, Grey or Black sourcing ?

          Think Active Measures.

          Vote UKIP :-D

          Like

      • 371
        The late Brian Sewell is not dead yet says:

        You are probably not worth suing. SC probably is. Learn.

        Like

  56. 161
    A Nightmare on Elm Guest House Street says:

    Lots of surprise resignations. Almost as if there are some shocking revelations about to hit.

    Like

  57. 164
    Shadwell says:

    David Jones has been a baaaaad baaaaad boy and he mutton do it again.

    Like

  58. 166
    Hawkeye says:

    Google Ken Clark Ben Fellows for an eye opener.

    Like

    • 242
      Anonymous is a semi-literate moron says:

      Oh. You mean Ken CLARKE, you idiot.

      Like

    • 436
      Say no to tinfoil says:

      The esteemed Exaro, before it recently donned a tinfoil hat which I sincerely hope they remove urgently, helped to prove that this allegation against Clarke is false. Google that.

      Like

  59. 167
    Anal Duncan says:

    Fuck you all. I’m off back into oil – Johnson’s Baby Oil – page 19 of ‘Men’s Health’ next month.

    Like

  60. 170
    The British media are cunts says:

    The Tories need to get rid of that Hunt Cameron to stand even a remote chance of winning.

    Like

    • 239
      Anonymous is a semi-literate moron says:

      Cameron is the only member of the Commons who’s as dim as Harriet the Man-Hater. Possibly. He’s so bloody dim you want to grab him by his tie and shake him until his eye-balls pop. The twat.

      Like

  61. 175
    • 186
      Not an oil painting says:

      You’re easily pleased. She’s got a face link a bulldog liking piss off a nettle.

      Like

    • 316
      Peter Bottomley says:

      She has a certain willowy, boyish attractiveness. Just needs her front teeth knocked out.

      Like

  62. 177
    white dee says:

    that twat Iain Duncan Something is hanging around looking for promotion. Well Cameron I ain’t going to take over the DWP minister job. Don’t care how desperate you are in filling it with someone who knows what to do.

    Like

  63. 180
  64. 181
    Dab hand says:

    Strong rumours that John Hayes has quit (was minister without portfolio/ Dave’s minister for backbenchers)

    Like

  65. 182
    Bosom Buddy says:

    “David Willetts quits, will leave parliament next year”

    An opportunity for Esther to give service under Saint Vincent!

    Like

  66. 184
    Maggie says:

    Well, bugger me!

    As my PPS Sir Peter Morrison, my adviser Keith Joseph, my friend Peter Righton, my friend Jimmy Savile, my friends and MPs Sir Rhodes Boyson and Harvey Proctor, and my friend Lord Boothby said to the children.

    Like

    • 225
      Hattie "PIE" Harmong, deput leader of the Labour Party and committed kiddy fiddler, says:

      Buggering children is perfectly acceptable. I fought for the right to bugger children, and I was right to.

      Like

      • 237
        Maggie says:

        Indeed! Which is why I never said anything about it, given that Peter Hayman was a member of PIE and my friend the Attorney General Michael Havers decided he shouldn’t be prosecuted. We’re all in this together.

        Like

    • 270
      Al Ducnan says:

      I always check their sell by date.

      Like

  67. 185
    Jimmy says:

    Clarke and Duncan. I think that’s the last vestiges of competence taken care of.

    Like

  68. 187
    David Willetts Official says:

    Why has no twat taken the piss out of me yet on this page?

    Am I fucking invisible or something?

    Like

  69. 189
    You must be joking says:

    No wonder the country has no money, where do they dig up these non jobs,

    Like

    • 194
      Bill Quango MP {angry} says:

      Bugger – didn’t get the “minister for viewing water and solvent or oil based liquid colour which slowly evaporates to allow the forming of a hard film
      surface with a gloss or matt protective coating.

      what will i do with my parliamentary time now?

      {some blonde job with perky tits just got that plum job!}

      Like

  70. 192
    Direct Dave says:

    And my first question to my cabinet friends was…

    “Have you ever had an interest in young children? If so, you better quit.”

    Like

  71. 193
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Has one term dave fired st Vincent of cable or ed windmills davey?

    Like

    • 196
      vince incapable says:

      I’m unsackable.

      no idea why. I’m old. Treacherous. Devious. Dim and foolish.

      I’ve cost the nation several billion pounds in just the last year. I plotted openly against my own leader. I make even the Brown one look semi-competent.

      Yet… here I am!

      Like

  72. 197
    The Poof In Residence says:

    Not enough benders left in the Cabinet.

    Like

  73. 200
    slush puppies says:

    The last scouse female minister had rather more ‘up top’ than Esther but was always prepared to give hours of service under her Prime Minister

    Every Good Girl Curries Favour

    Like

  74. 203
    Gerry Mandering says:

    Dim Dave does it again. Just as you are pushing for a Tory government, you sack a few you don’t like. So from now on, they’ll be sitting on the back benches with their mates sniping at you at every turn. What a way to run a party. Its almost like he has a death wish – or under orders.

    Roll on 2015. UKIP will clean up here.

    Like

  75. 204
    Tosser Dave says:

    OK. OK . I resign myself. I now realise that I have been an unutterable fucking disaster as P.M.

    Frau Merkel told me to fuck off and confirmed Junket’s appointment. That finally confirmed that I am a useless weak prat.

    Never mind. My legacy is the legalisation of bumsex marriage. My Eton boyfriends really admire my determination in this respect.

    Like

    • 209
      David Davies says:

      I have been tossing and turning the other cheeks all night and can unequivocally confirm that I totally support the Prime Minister in the view that he is a useless prat.

      Like

  76. 205
    Anonymous says:

    Trying to emulate MacMillan’s night of the long knioves – did the Tory party no good at all

    Like

    • 215
      Fishy says:

      IN fairness, unlike Bliar, Cameron has largely stuck by his ministers – changes have been few and far between.

      DWP had 9 Secretaries of State in Bliar / Brown’s 13 years. And all of them were useless. No wonder DWP was a mess.

      Like

  77. 206
    Was the Butler sloshed? says:

    Knight to Queen’s Bishop for. . . . .

    Like

  78. 213
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Grub was obviously served at 6:00 pm so he could see how the wonderful BBC was reporting it. They are wonderful, the BBC. They do costume dramas, bad history and save the shrimp.

    Like

    • 222
      The BBC says:

      Our next costume drama is Nadresh’s War, about how black, Asian and other ethnic minority communities in Elizabethan England defeated the Spanish Armada.

      These costume dramas reach out to the ethnic communities who today, of course, account for the majority of Britain’s population outside London. While there are some white people outside London, they are mainly hard-working Eastern European immigrants who have always contributed to the economy.

      Like

      • 529
        Bob cuntface Crow says:

        Henry V wouldn’t have won Agincourt without all them brave Polish and Romanian archers.

        Like

  79. 220
    Political Holiday Time says:

    Attorney General Dominic Grieve. Interesting, very interesting. Responsible for choosing child abuse chair person?

    Like

    • 232
      Bluto says:

      Also responsible for not sacking Labour supporter and activist Keir Starmer as DPP, a civil service post supposed to demonstrate strict impartiality.

      “Of Mr Starmer’s lecture (in 2009), Mr Grieve said: ‘This is a remarkable speech.
      ‘It envisages a role for the Crown Prosecution Service fundamentally different to the current one.’ He added: ‘It muses on the role of the Supreme Court, well beyond the DPP’s remit. And it crudely mis-states the Conservative position on the Human Rights Act.’ Mr Grieve said: ‘It will be difficult to sustain the cross-party convention of avoiding impinging on the independence of the DPP, if he continues to stray so far from his constitutional role.’”

      And yet Grieve allowed Starmer to stay in post and he is now advising the Labour party. This is a very dangerous man who wants to undermine traditional British justice and its safeguards in favour of the Napoleonic Code:-

      “But the row over its contents deepened as party leaders read it in full and discovered passages in which he also seemingly set out a role for himself as chief criminal investigator, prosecutor, jury and judge. They believe Mr Starmer wants to turn himself into a British version of the French investigating magistrate, an official appointed under France’s Napoleonic legal code who both questions and tries suspects. He said prosecutors should investigate crime alongside police, hand out fines and cautions out of court, present cases in court, and ‘assist the courts in the sentencing process’.
      They should consult public opinion to test what sort of crimes people wanted to see prosecuted, he said. Tories were also alarmed to discover Mr Starmer had been speculating about increased powers for the judges of the newly-launched Supreme Court. Mr Starmer said that the opening of the new tribunal meant ‘at least the possibility that we may see a move in time towards perhaps a constitutional court with which other jurisdictions are not only familiar but comfortable’.”

      Watch this space. He is now in cahoots with Thornberry. We have not heard the last of Comrade Starmer.

      Like

  80. 221
    Anonymous says:

    Dave really does have a very high opinion of himself. Most people I know just see him as another Blair, just wants to be in no 10 but neither in office nor in power.

    He really is so weak policy wise just like Blair aimlessly drifting along in the hope that he will just get re-elected.

    I’m afraid Dave but that is not gonna happen mate!!

    Vote tory for a united states of europe without a vote
    Vote lib dem for a united states of europe without a vote.
    Vote labour for a united states of europe without a vote.
    Vote tory get labour!

    So just vote ukip.

    Like

    • 226
      nell says:

      The view of folks like polling uk is that UKIP are going to get about 8% of the vote in 2015 -which will be a good starting point for them and give them a couple of MP’s which I hope includes nige – but they are not going to be in position to form a government just yet.

      Like

  81. 223
  82. 224
    Anonymous says:

    Wouldn’t it be a right giggle if a couple of these sacked guys were to join UKIP tomorrow?
    Only asking…

    Like

    • 231
      IDS for UKIP says:

      Iain Smith now Duncan Smith behaves as if he should have been founding member, leader and still the leader of UKIP

      Like

    • 233
      Popcorn time! The inevitable that is to come. says:

      What, like Ken “pushed not jumped” Clarke?

      Maybe. What’s going to be really really funny is watching Dave “all-female selection lists” Camoron replace these people with useless cretins whose sole ‘qualification’ for the job is that they’ve got vaginas rather than any ability or experience, and then watching it all fall apart over the next 10 months.

      And then we get to watch Dimmy Dave cry his eyes out when the little tosser Miliband beats him in the general election.

      Like

    • 235
      You must be joking says:

      NO.

      Like

  83. 227

    Well, if nothing else at least ‘Two Faces’ Willetts has gone.

    Like

  84. 228
    ealing says:

    I am twinned with drunken place in France.

    Hey, Did you hear about 10% kashmiri Muslim Halifax. It is twinned with a spa town/city in Germany. It a appears that a lot of scientific work gets done there.

    So the link between shuffle on and this?

    The people with the biggest sense of self righteousness have an upper hand. No worries. Everyone is living in a different movie of their making.

    Like

  85. 229
    Rinka Scott says:

    Nine out of nine leaving are male.

    This is suspicious and a little sexist.

    Like

  86. 240
    Socialism = Starvation says:

    I am trying to think of a reshuffle that made government better, but I can think of no examples ever.

    Like

    • 243
      Still Hope says:

      And Duncan Shite goes you will have one.

      Like

      • 259
        softly softly says:

        The Minister of Uphill Gardening has obviously gone as far up as he can and can go no further.

        Like

    • 257
      Realist says:

      The ministers really don’t matter. Any good ideas people have when they gain office are quickly destroyed by incompetent implementation within the civil service. This used to be accidental, but now the service is full of left wingers, who do not attempt to disguise or separate their personal views from their work, it’s intentional.

      Like

      • 339
        Spineless Cameron says:

        “The ministers really don’t matter.” WRONG.

        Owen Paterson was the right man in the right job. Handled the Horsemeat scandal superbly. Hanlded the Somerset floods scandal superbly. THEY are the reasons he was sacked. HE WAS COMPETENT AT HIS JOB (plus he pissed of the watemelons).

        Like

  87. 245
    dolphin square says:

    Duggy willy Hague going? That would be odd. What could prompt that?

    Like

  88. 251

    Pale Male and Stale. The noose concentrates on the main problem facing us today.

    Sky pontificating on Will I Am Fackin Useless walking the plank.

    Like

    • 260
      You must be joking says:

      My missus says whoever is telling him what to do, should be the one that should be sacked, he’s too late , he should have done it before he went directly after Nige calling him racist, she says the moment he did that he lost the women’s vote, I think he has lost her vote, the bully going after the little boy calling him names that are not true, oh! dear, Esther McVey no woman’s vote .

      Like

  89. 253
    Boris Cashless-Buses says:

    Just keep your bum on the seat untill next year Davy Boy, the I’ii take over

    Like

  90. 254
    Getting out while he can? says:

    I wonder if one of those leaving the Cabinet is the one the whistleblower said he witnessed at a Tory underage sex party in the 80s and was still a serving minister in this government.

    Like

  91. 256
    Gunnery Sergeant Hartman says:

    9:28pm: Owen Paterson sacked.
    Badgers smirk.

    Like

  92. 261
    Anonymous says:

    Has Vince Cable been sacked yet?

    Like

  93. 265
    Enrichment News 24 says:

    Like

  94. 271
    Tee Hee, hee says:

    This is effing hilarious.

    The night of the long knives — even the dates align.

    “He had a picture of MacMillan on the wall — that’s all you need to know” — said Dominic Cummings recently, of Cameron.

    This fantasist runs Britain? Wouldn’t last a year in the private sector.

    Like

    • 282
      Tee Hee, hee (p.s.) says:

      And that’s only because it’s so hard to sack employees these days.

      Wouldn’t have lasted a week in the private sector in MacMillan’s day.

      Like

  95. 277
    Shooty* says:

    Oh, Jesus, Dave determined to lose the election by replacing passable people with talentless window dressing. FFS.

    Like

  96. 278
    You must be joking says:

    So even woman bishops can’t cover, Camoron getting rid of all the trash.

    Like

  97. 279
    Jack the Ripper says:

    Does Dave have Merkel’s permission for this reshuffle?

    Like

  98. 281
    Ockham's Razor says:

    I can fly to Uranus from Newquay.

    Like

  99. 285
    Socialism = Starvation says:

    Richmond no longer claims a Great Officer of State as its MP, as it did with Leon Brittan and William Hague. What is become of this town?

    Like

    • 509
      Exit the Mekon says:

      Yes this is the constituency in which I reside, thinking of starting a ‘I like full grown women’ party, think I might just get in considering the mood in the town.

      Like

  100. 286
    Fill in the blanks says:

    Bonfire of the …….

    Like

  101. 290
    'Moderate' Muslim says:

    We invite William Vague to walk the talk and come and help us fight in Benghazi

    Like

  102. 291
    Anonymous says:

    Hague is out then………..

    Like

  103. 293
    William Hague says:

    I am leaving parliament in order to redouble my commitment to international causes that I believe in, such as sniffing Angelina Jolie’s farts.

    Like

  104. 298
    This mans judgement is utter shit says:

    Has Cameron culled himself yet ?

    Like

  105. 301
    visibly shaken says:

    it is right for women to be given positions of power in the country.

    and it is right for them to be given no time to effect any kind of change with that power.

    Like

  106. 303
    Anonymous says:

    Channel 4′s TV show Dispatches undercover filming in a Blackburn Islamic school have revealed more instances of extremism by the schools Islamist staff. The video shows staff talking about stoning gay people and banning music, while clapping, whistling and neck ties are branded “Satanic”.
    In today’s society leftists and do gooders have managed to make political correctness a major part of daily life. Yet Muslims for some reason don’t think that this applies to the for some reason.
    There should be no place in British schools for extremism of any kind. Young children look up to teachers and take on board the things the teachers tell them as they are there to learn as the teachers are there to teach. With radical views such as these being past on to Muslim children is it any wonder the UK has so many Muslim problems. British born terrorists, wonnabe jihadists, lack of integration and a Muslim r@pe wave when kids are having these kind of views pushed on them

    Like

    • 306
      a taxpayer says:

      Shut these schools down immediately.

      Like

      • 532
        Bob cuntface Crow says:

        Burn them to the fucking ground ,kids, teachers govnors, halal serving dinner ladies,mustafa sweep the caretaker, the fucking lot.

        Like

    • 315
      Satanic white male says:

      Political correctness and Islam are both religions, and both do harm, though of course the latter does far more.

      Like

      • 323
        non taxable pikey says:

        Not just Islamic Schools but also ultra-orthadox hassids and Creaationist Christian Schools as well. All shown in the programme.
        Has the Education Minister quit yet?

        Like

        • 337
          visibly shaken says:

          I understand you being bothered about the teachings of jihad and stoning of gays and the r.a.p.e. of women being taught in Trojan schools across the land because one day it might effect you if you are a woman or gay.

          I don’t understand why you object to those who want to be taught creationism being taught that. It doesn’t effect anybody else.

          I would understand if you objected to the teaching of climate change in schools however. There is more fact in scientology than the science of climate change.

          Like

    • 330
      Fishy says:

      But it’s not extremist. What is being described is a cultural norm.

      On the day of the report into the ‘Trojan Horse’ schools one teacher (of British origin) was asked why her school did not have dance and movement on the timetable.

      She replied, it wasn’t, the timetable reflected the culture of the local community.

      The dozy bint, just didn’t get it…she was a fully signed up pig ignorant adherent to multiculturalism squad. Not understanding for one minute that the left’s version of multiculturalism, and she, was condemning the kids, to who she was supposed to deliver enlightenment, to life in a primitive cultural ghetto.

      Like

  107. 305
    Anonymous says:

    Just waiting for useless dave, the one like blair, that marches his troops to the top of the hill, never puts up a fight, just gets outgunned(Merkel,Juncker), to sack himself and get replaced with a real tory. But I guess he’ll carry on replacing his sacked colleagues with more liberals.

    Like

  108. 308
    Jimmy says:

    The night of the long peashooters…

    Like

  109. 309
    Leon Brittan says:

    George Robertson and myself run a discrete self-help group for politicians who for no reason at all make a unexpected exit from politics. Lines are open now.

    Like

  110. 310
    The British media are cunts says:

    Has Ed Milimong resigned yet?

    Like

  111. 313
    Jimmy says:

    Will Incapable Vince and IDS be allowed to avoid the dole queue?
    Will Shapps be trusted to lead HMS Tory into the election?
    Will Jeremy Hunt be allowed to hide behind a tree to avoid being sacked?

    Like

  112. 314
    Anonymous says:

    Like

  113. 319
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Willy Bum Vague was just about the only decent politician in the tory party , i was rather hoping he would challenge “Do Nowt Dave for the leadership after next years election humiliation

    Why has he not got rid of the totally fucking useless and criminally insane Theresa May ?
    Or even that Dead fish eyed mad man Jeremy C u n t
    Even George “never had a real job” Osborne wouldn’t be missed

    Like

    • 328
      You must be joking says:

      It’s who he has to replace these people, tomorrow is another day and another comment.

      Like

    • 335
      Jimmy says:

      Hague
      Brittan
      Dolphin Square

      Geddit?

      Like

      • 356
        Fishy says:

        No I don’t geddit.

        Can you expand on your innuendo please. Full details (names, dates, evidence witnesses) with be sufficient.

        PS: You might want to give your Brief a quick call after you provide the detail.

        PPS: And if you can’t put up, shut up.

        Like

        • 476
          Actually says:

          Lots of victims DID go to the police with names, addresses, dates and details. And the fuzz were told by the government to back off.

          P.S. Got something to hide?

          Like

  114. 320
    Lancashire Fiscal says:

    Forget the Here Today, Gone Tomorrow politicos. Telegraph is reporting Sir Bob Kerslake sacked,

    Like

    • 359
      Fishy says:

      Hurrah.

      The ECHR apologist, Grieve, gone

      The Head of the obstacle that is the Civil Service, Kerslake, gone

      Like

  115. 325
    P l e b says:

    Maybe Cameron’s bringing back Andrew Mitchell and Liam Fox and his Werrity.

    Like

  116. 326
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    How many Glib Dumbs has he got rid of ?
    or is he scared they will end his coalition

    Wanker !

    Like

    • 365
      Fishy says:

      He can’t touch the Lib Dems…their quota was part of the Coalition Agreement and any appointments concerning the drag anchor that are the Yellows is for Cleggy to deal with.

      Like

  117. 327
    Iain Duncan Smith says:

    Bring back Harvey Proctor.

    Like

  118. 329
    Alastair Campbell tweet says:

    “Maybe Cameron could put one of his sacked ministers in charge of this Butler Sloss inquiry?”

    William Hague would be my choice

    Like

  119. 332
    The British media are cunts says:

    I see the lefties are wetting themselves over Malala demanding the release of those schoolgirls.

    Yet another useless lefty wankfest, the only thing that would make it worse would be the presence of the one eyed mong.

    Like

  120. 334
    Are Black people proportionaly more likely to be invited into the HoC? says:

    Like

  121. 338
    Jimmy says:

    The whole corrupt edifice is crumbling before our very eyes.

    Like

    • 353
      Tachybaptus says:

      Corrupt as the edifice may be, I think you underestimate its strength. And the tottering tower of toxic waste that would replace it if your lot got in defies the most lurid description. Even the socialists I know say that Miliband makes them despair and Balls makes them gag.

      Like

    • 354
      You must be joking says:

      We may have version 3 after May 2015 happening, version one was 2010, Brown still no show and is getting paid, surely the lefty powers that be should be asking why?, after all it’s mostly money from the ordinary workers that you lot say you represent.

      Like

  122. 341
    Fuck off you bald cunt says:

    Like

  123. 342
    Fffffffion says:

    Good riddance to Hague though. He showed great promise and potential yet failed miserably. I hope Dave doesn’t put Hague’s wrestling Chum Coe in charge of the BBC.

    Like

  124. 345
    Fuck off you bald cunt says:

    Ha, ha, ha, ha ha, ha, ha ha, ha, ha ha, ha, ha ha, ha, ha

    Give my love to Leon….

    Like

  125. 348
    constituency trainbound says:

    sorry to see hague departing as FS … hammond not half the diplomat

    Like

  126. 349
  127. 350
    Bradgelina says:

    Hey willy, who gonna look after a girl now? Ham an, hammer on, ham and?

    Like

  128. 351
    Didn't stop Hague going native though says:

    Like

    • 454
      Anonymous says:

      What is Camerons policy on the Ukraine, Israel?

      The EU runs our foreign policy now. Schweinhund!

      Like

  129. 354
    Jimmy says:

    Cameron expunging all connections to Thatcher, the peedofile’s friend?

    Like

  130. 357
    Piece of shit Watch says:

    Hunt twat Alistair McGowan just congratulated the England team for reaching the World cup quarter finals.

    The Hunt obviously didn’t get the correct worldcup script.

    Like

  131. 363
    Jimmy Tarbuck says:

    I heard that, after signing their sponsorship deal with Newcastle United, Wog.na complained that the players weren’t giving it 15900% every match

    Like

  132. 366
    Fred Karno says:

    Amazing that the 2 most incompetent havent got a mention yet …. May and Smith….

    still i suppose competence isnt a major concern in Government.

    Like

  133. 367
    Jimmy Tarbuck says:

    I heard that, after signing their sponsorship deal with Newcastle United, Wonga complained that the players weren’t giving it 15900% every match

    Like

  134. 370
    Fruitcake, swivel eyed loon, closet racist, crank and gadfly says:

    Tories galore sacked ‘standing down’ or retiring to spend more time with their pensions.

    Meanwhile the Limp Dumbs escape, so far, unscathed.

    What has Clegg got on the spineless one?

    Like

  135. 373
    Nigella Fromage says:

    “Ukip support plummets to push Tories back into the lead
    Poll shows Tories picking up majority of deserters as Farage’s party drops back into single figures, with Labour on 33%”

    Like

  136. 379
    Rinka Scott says:

    So Haigh has made the same move as Howe and Cook before him.

    Just think about it.

    He could have stayed in the FO until next May,cut the overseas travel and helped the Election campaign before leaving.

    Now he as a grey white middle aged man can only argue the Tory cause before the Electorate.

    Like

  137. 380
    Labour says:

    Nick Hurd, son of the former foreign secretary Lord Hurd of Westwell, is standing down as minister for civil society. Hurd tweeted: “there is no possibility of achieving a civil society under David Cameron”

    Like

  138. 381
    A non says:

    We will read it all here first. Unless we read it somewhere else first. In which case, we will read it there. Do keep up, Guido…

    Like

  139. 382
    And about time too says:

    Like

  140. 383
    MI5 says:

    Hague knows where the bodies are buried

    Like

  141. 384
    Let it sink says:

    Like

    • 390
      Printing Money is Good for You says:

      They’re learning from us – print money is the only answer!

      Like

      • 451

        No – They need the Eurozone weak so as Citizen’s feel economically vulnerable otherwise the propaganda claiming that the US wishes to enslave Europeans – needed in order to advance some of the pan-Europa agenda – will not have any credibility, hence fail.

        The US for it’s part is acting in such a way that any such claim by Europe’s leaders would get laughed out of even the Prime-Mentalist’s Bierkeller.

        So – Europe is going to be poor, and sulky.

        Vote UKIP :-D

        Like

  142. 386
    Anonymous says:

    Send it to Chris Spivey. He isn’t afraid to publish.

    Like

  143. 388
    F##k the LibLabCon says:

    So our politicians are now chosen based on their gender alone, and our police force are chosen based on they race. It would appear the idea of choosing folk based solely on their abilities has been totally abandoned by Dave.

    Like

  144. 393
    Moussa Koussa's pet meerkat says:

    Titanic sailing tonight and the tories are jumping ship before it hits the iceberg next May

    Like

  145. 395

    Looks like Dave is going to be in need of a fresh butter knife after all that cutting tonight: If he asks Jean Claude nicely, he may lend him a newish one.

    Vote UKIP :-D

    Like

  146. 400
    Max Clifford's press secretary says:

    Blimey are they Quaare ?

    Like

  147. 416
    Gordon Broon says:

    Anyone sacked yet who went to Eton?

    Like

  148. 418
    Terminology says:

    So what is the difference between

    “sacked”
    “Quits”
    “stands down” and
    “is out”

    ?

    Like

    • 447
      Mystic Mog says:

      Sacked= Sacked
      Quits= offered a terrible alternative job/demotion so decides against it.
      Stands down= similar to quits.
      Is out= Nick Cook

      Like

  149. 430
    Bag says:

    Is that dumb Anna Soubry in line for promotion?
    She is fucking thick as a bag of pig shit,

    Like

  150. 433
    Bob Rusk says:

    Geeds wets himself when there’s a reshuffle. Meanwhile, in the real world, no one gives a shit … just one set of dickheads replacing another set of dickheads.

    Like

    • 444
      A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

      So vote Labour then and see where that gets you.

      Like

      • 463
        Bob Rusk says:

        I’ll be voting UKIP, thank you very much. You’re constant Tory trolling has no effect on me.

        Like

        • 501
          Must try harder says:

          Me neither.
          Every time you state the predictable
          bollocks-a vote for UKIP is a vote for
          Labour-it strengthens my resolve to
          vote UKIP.

          Like

  151. 435
    Billy Boy says:

    Off back to working for McKinsey for me. They’ll find out about me and the pig farmer its only a matter of time.

    Like

  152. 438
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Spoon face Camermong seems to have gone ever so quiet on his backing for the Arab spring up risings which he supported to the hilt last year

    Like

  153. 443
    Ed Dafty, LimpDim MP, Climate Change Chieftain says:

    Like

  154. 446
    David Minibanana says:

    Like

  155. 448
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Has Vince DespiCable the biggest parliamentary fuck up of the last 100 years , been sacked yet for losing the taxpayers a BILLION pounds and still (while blaming every one and everything else )denies royal mail was sold on the cheap
    What an incompetent twat he is

    Like

  156. 452
    Sucker says:

    Like

  157. 453
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Jobs should go to the best candidate for the job , not just because they are a woman
    Cameron pandering to the Labour party yet again
    No fuckin bottle Dave thats your problem !

    Like

  158. 457
    Jimmy says:

    Cashcroft’s errand boy out of the FCO?

    Interesting.

    Like

  159. 459
    Covering up chold abuse is a criminal offence. Doing so whilst a judge is an aggr says:

    Baroness Butler-Sloss should be jailed.

    Like

  160. 465
    A Badger says:

    Result!

    Like

  161. 471
    Professor Green says:

    Paterson had to go. He had no understanding of his brief particularly in relation to the importance of developing green energy to ensure energy independence.

    TTT Typical Tory Tw*t

    Like

    • 499

      He was the only one of them on top of his brief

      Like

      • 504
        visibly shaken says:

        spot on with green energy policy.

        less free money for farmers.

        only problem was he didn’t kill enough badgers for my liking. but that was down to NFU incompetence really.

        Like

    • 518
      Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

      Patterson is now in prime position to be the stalking horse, in the Autumn, when the 1922 committee come for Cameron’s head, unless the Tories have a 15 point lead over Labour :-)

      Like

  162. 475
    Start the paedo inquiry by investigating all the resigning ministers says:

    You might as well assume they’re all at it. Its what these public schools and oxford toffs drinking clubs do for a pastime – bugger the young’uns.

    Like

  163. 483
    Esther McVile is a CUNT says:

    I WON!!

    Like

  164. 485
    Esther McVey says:

    I’ve got nothing on, Dave …………….

    Like

  165. 486
    Esther McVey says:

    TELEVISION!!??????
    I don’t want television.!!
    I want the top job!!
    Now, Dave, get it right
    I’m very good ………. you know, like la

    Like

  166. 487
    albacore says:

    Doesn’t matter how much they shuffle shit
    Is there anyone left still buying it?
    The name on the door of this Parliament
    Needs changing to Houses of Excrement

    Like

  167. 488
    Sinister says:

    What about human lefts?

    Like

  168. 489
    Jeremy Hunt says:

    I have decided to have a “crackdown” and to charge immigrants 150% of the cost of their NHS treatment. This means 150% of the cost of treatment instead of 100% will remain uncollected. Vote Tory.

    Like

  169. 490
    The Poof in Residence says:

    It looks like the Cabinet will have more now with front bottoms…..Ugh ! Ugh !

    Like

  170. 493
    Bye bye says:

    Nick Clegg out.

    Like

  171. 495
    That's not a Re-Shuffle... says:

    …that’s a Clean-Out!

    Like

  172. 496
    Inspector Knacker of the Yard says:

    What an extraordinary coincidence, all the names on that list of former minsters are on my list of middle-aged Tories to interview as part of Yewtree!

    Like

  173. 502
    Exit the Mekon says:

    Best place to hide a body is on a battlefield.

    Like

  174. 503
    Dyno-Rod Dave says:

    IDS to stay at DWP – because he knows where the bodies are – he killed them all

    Like

  175. 506
    Grant Shapps says:

    Are the four most talented people in the Tory party really Hammond, May Osborne and Cameron? We’re doomed!

    Like

  176. 511
    Owen Jones says:

    Does anyone know how to get a cum stain off a mattress?Only Ikea are threatening to make me buy it.

    Like

  177. 515
    You must be joking says:

    They can’t throw you in jail yet for having a suspicious mind, but I was thinking the same sort of why?= throwing toys out of pram, nah politics= minister=fame=invites=lots and lots of money, if you live high on the hog you have to keep it up and that takes money, it’ll all come out after the whitewash fades and they think people have forgotten.

    Like

    • 524
      F S Trueman says:

      In cricket when a senior batsmen wants to retire he tells his Captain in private and carries on to the end of the season.

      He doesn’t just drop everything mid season to captain the second eleven and write a book.

      Like

  178. 517
    Voting UKIP says:

    Are Dave’s replacements Old Etonians in drag?

    Like

  179. 525
    an awkward bastard says:

    Someone has just said Cameron has booted Gove because he is more of a liability than an asset.

    What about all the others leaving I ask myself.

    Like

  180. 530
    Anonymous says:

    “Hague Out”
    But there’s no need to sign-on. Judging by clips of his conference performances as a precocious child, and comical latter efforts. A future career in panto, with the Krankies, beckons.

    Like

  181. 533
    Anonymous says:

    Ever the sportsman, Cameron is doing his best to make Miliband seem competent.

    Like

  182. 536
    Bonar Law says:

    No, Guido, NOT “a Downing Street spokesperson”. You mean, “a Downing Street SPOKESMAN” – the grammatically correct generic term. Cut out the asinine political correctness.

    Like


Seen Elsewhere

Even Ed’s Friends Call Him ‘Bad Luck Magnet’ | Mail
BBC: It Was Guido Wot Won It | MediaGuido
Nick Robinson’s Britain First Selfie | Metro
Dyson: Leave German Dominated EU, Join EFTA |
How UKIP Won Rochester | Seb Payne
Labour’s Islington Problem | Harry Phibbs
Ed Lost More Than a By-Election | Labour Uncut
Labour the Biggest Losers in Rochester | Speccie
Thornberry a Gift to Farage | Nick Wood
Is Left Finally Turning Against EU? | Dan Hannan
Labour Votes Going Green | Guardian


Find out more about PLMR AD-MS


Ralph Miliband on the English…

“The Englishman is a rabid nationalist. They are perhaps the most nationalist people in the world.”



Left on Left says:

The lefties are attacking because the panellist is a millionaire and lives in a London home worth upwards of two million. Someone had best tell them he’s called Ed Miliband.


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