July 11th, 2014

Friday Caption Contest (World Cup Final Predictions Edition)


161 Comments

  1. 1
    Havocman says:

    The Pope does his Angela Merkel/KitKat joke yet again.

    Like

  2. 2
    Jimmy says:

    Some controversial tactics have been unveiled at the inaugural rock paper scissors world cup.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. 3
    Angela says:

    You dirty old man!

    Like

  4. 4
    Pope says:

    Have you seen my ring?

    Like

  5. 5
    Pope says:

    I bet you are a squirter!

    Like

  6. 6
    Moon Boy says:

    “Read between the lines bitch!”

    Like

  7. 7
    Tulchan Beatz says:

    “You haven’t got a prayer”

    Like

  8. 8
    ancientpopeye says:

    Up yours too Angela.

    Like

  9. 9
    Anonymous says:

    Praying for a draw!

    Like

  10. 10
    hihat says:

    two in the pink one in the stink

    Like

  11. 11
    Alfie says:

    Angela I thought you’d know where your G Spot is. Tell your husband that this is how he should do it!

    Like

  12. 12
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Each: How many fingers can you take?

    Like

  13. 13
    Chris Reynolds says:

    Give us Las Islas Rügen or eternal damnation for all Germans.

    Like

  14. 14
    Time 2 CTRL, ALT & DEL says:

    Now how did Winston do his V for Victory?

    Liked by 1 person

  15. 16
    BBB+ Rated. says:

    “They think I’m a double agent, I’m actually a triple”

    Like

  16. 17
    The Pope says:

    So Angie, today’s star prize on Papal 3-2-1 is…
    Europe.

    Like

  17. 18
    Radio Bollocks says:

    Pope: Hitler’s – sorry the Huns – eleven, by four!

    Like

  18. 19
    geordieboy says:

    Three Hail Mary’s for the price of one Angela.

    Like

  19. 21
    Robin J Smith says:

    “I’m just dying to caress your G-spot, Frau Merkel”

    Like

  20. 22
    Bug says:

    Jesus loves EU

    Like

  21. 23
    M­a­­q­b­o­­ul says:

    If Germany win I’ll be expecting three Hail Marys and a How’s yer Father as penance my child.

    Like

  22. 23
    Bishop of Rome says:

    How would this work? Boys don’t have a front bottom.

    Like

  23. 26
    M says:

    A.M.
    You wanna join the EU ?
    Pope.
    I’m just getting used to these new communication devises , which finger do I use ?

    Like

    • 152
      Just Saying. says:

      Pope – I won 300 Euro on Germany against Brazil.
      Merkel – Good for you, I just won the EU.

      Like

  24. 27
    angela panzer says:

    7 goals past the other Dagos..so I think we will do 8 past your aging divers.

    Like

  25. 28
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Popey: For lunch we have three pullet.

    Angie: There is your first.

    Like

  26. 29

    Fancy you knowing 3 of my Argentine relatives!

    Like

  27. 30
    sometime I wonder, then I think who cares says:

    And you shot down Cameron was it 3 times?

    Like

  28. 31
    Finger of Fun says:

    No, this is what you can do with your Euro.

    Like

  29. 32
    sometime I wonder, then I think who cares says:

    Bloody British getting in on our deals.

    Like

  30. 33
    PaulJB says:

    Who’s wearing the trousers here. Anglia’s right & she’ll have the erect finger.

    Like

  31. 36
    Angela Merkel says:

    On behalf of all of Germany I would like to thank the Vatican and Argentina for giving shelter to so many N*zis after the war.

    Like

  32. 37
    angela panzer says:

    The Holy Trinity is nothing compared to the power of the Junker

    Like

  33. 39
    Bill Quango MP says:

    {simultaneously}

    “Nice Rug, wiggy!”

    Like

  34. 40
    Anonymous says:

    This is the real Argentinian Hand of God!

    Like

  35. 41
    sovietsalami63 says:

    sovietsalami63 Here,
    CANNOT access legal aid, CANNOT access doctors appointment at surgery , P hone calls cost too much and the appointments have all gone within 24 mins , Cannot book in advance as all appointment have gone for the next week at least.
    Why are these fucking shits in government Tories shitting on us time after time after time , I have no option but to leave this country soon and will not return.

    Like

    • 44
      David Cummerbund says:

      Good.
      Fuck off.

      freeloading socialist bellend.

      Like

      • 49
        sovietsalami63 says:

        Go and fuck of yourself you arsehole Tory Loving Monarchist

        Like

        • 57
          Anonymous says:

          You are an Obvious Troll.

          That fact does not belittle the fact you are also an Obvious Hunt.

          Like

        • 61
          Fishy says:

          GPs are seeing 25% less patients according to a new report.

          They’re busy on the golf course spending their extra free time and inflated salaries that were given to them by Gordon Brown.

          Like

          • Nice weather we're 'avin says:

            Salami could get an appointment easily. Friday is the best time to book online for monday morning. There is also an NHS drop in center in Middleton so get in taxi and go there now.
            (Seem to remember he is from Leeds lol.)

            Like

          • bergen says:

            I think the ridiculous GP contract was signed in Blair’s time. Alan Johnson was Health Secretary – don’t know why people rate him.

            Like

          • Off White Dee says:

            probably one of those council house whingers.

            Been shitting in the sink for three weeks ..” ‘coz me toilets blocked and the lazy council says they can’t come out and fix it until August!..I’m not chucking no bleach down the pan..i’M NOT A TRAINED EXPERT PLUMBER SLASH CLEANER IS OI?”

            Like

    • 50
      sometime I wonder, then I think who cares says:

      Bye and make sure you have plenty of money in your bank account to pay for the doctor abroad.

      Like

      • 53
        workers vote UKIP. .And email Chucky. says:

        Go on please..grass is always greener (but cheaper and of better quality in the uk)

        Like

  36. 42
    Pope says:

    Did you see Gordon brown on the Jock Question Time last night?, really let himself go, hasn’t he.

    Like

  37. 43
    The Pope says:

    A finger of fudge is just enough to keep a kiddy quite

    Like

  38. 45
    Steve Miliband says:

    I only wanted the ceiling painted in Magnolia

    Like

  39. 46
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Angela: Is that an enlarged tendon or are you just pleased to see me?

    Like

  40. 48
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Can you put the bet in your name as I am not allowed to do such things?

    (Angela to Pope)

    Like

  41. 51
    Anthony Dixon says:

    Pope : “Two in the pink, one in the brown ?”

    Merkel : “Ya das ist gut”

    Like

  42. 52
    angela panzer says:

    Guess how many times more German green energy costs the consumer than the EU average!

    Ya ..three times more..

    Like

  43. 54
    The Pope says:

    You look like you’ve been dragged through a burning bush I’d change your stylist darling

    Like

  44. 55
    Fishy says:

    Yes…three years Bormann stayed with us, three years while the Capitalist pigs of West Germany were digging holes all over Berlin, looking for him.

    Like

  45. 58
    Ockham's Razor says:

    P: You have Sudetenland, we’ll have the Malvinas. Now get the Hefeweizen in.

    M: Though you’ld be on the Bischofs Finger!

    Like

  46. 60
    Up yours Delours and other Sun headlines says:

    So Chancellor you gave Mr Cameron a sign of how you felt regarding his objections to Mr Juncker’s appointment then ? Was it by any chance similar to this ?

    Yes your holiness but I only used two fingers.

    Like

  47. 63
    Dementia says:

    Pope : This was a technique that a Labour Peer showed me back in the 80s…

    Like

  48. 64

    “As Pius XII was to the Third Reich so I expect you to be to our Fourth Reich.”

    Like

  49. 65

    Messi’s going to give you the finger on Sunday

    Like

  50. 66
    David Cameron says:

    Pope ” Angela, My dear ,it’s true I have 3 balls”

    Like

  51. 69
    Spankie says:

    I’ll bend you over and spank you, you naughty little pope.

    Like

  52. 72
    Ah! men says:

    It’s three, and I’m infallible.

    Like

  53. 73
    IDS (Israeli Death Squad) says:

    Pope – “Germany vill score sree goals”
    Geli – “and the Argies vill get only von”

    Like

    • 107
      A Vote for UKIP is a Vote for Labour says:

      I’d be surprised if the Argies limit Germany to three goals.

      Is De Kirchner still running her country into the ground over there? They could do with a little more of the Anglo Saxon – or dare one say it – Germanic mindset down there.

      Like

  54. 74
    Socialism Ate My Future says:

    Pope: So Spain, Portugal and Greece?
    Merkel: Don’t forgot Italy!

    Like

  55. 76

    “And how many divisions have you got? Only three, then we’ll just sweep in your Vatican State with our Italian annexation.”

    Like

  56. 77
    I've seen that hand before says:

    Like

  57. 78
    The British media are cunts says:

    The Pope: I don’t know why you’re smiling Angela the British beat you three times, 1918, 1945 and 1966, they’ve only beaten us once.

    Like

  58. 79
    Banned says:

    “And after my third attempt to exorcise the demons from Tony Blair, Jesus appeared and told me not to bother as he was definitely going to hell anyway”

    Like

  59. 82
    bergen says:

    I told Benedict he could pray for Germany until they played us so you’re stuffed tomorrow.

    Like

  60. 83
    Timozweb says:

    How many Divisions do you have, one?

    Like

  61. 84
    sovietsalami63 says:

    soviet salami63 Here ,
    Thankyou all for your. kind comments I shall remember them while I’m loving it abroad ,Just. Wished I’d never been dropped here by mother, Germany , Sweden , Holland HERE I come !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!YIpEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE goodbye to all you Financialsexslaves.

    Like

  62. 85

    Smell my finger

    Like

  63. 86
    Checkpoint Charlie says:

    Republica del Argentina 3

    Three Powers Sector 2

    Like

  64. 87
    Mr Smeeth says:

    Scissor beats paper, I win

    Like

  65. 88
    Rickytshirt says:

    His Holiness:

    ‘…it came of quite far up and could not be retrieved. The young lad had to wait three days for it to pass.’

    Frau Merkel:

    ‘It’s a good job you weren’t wearing your Rolex.’

    His Holiness:

    ‘Yes, he really would have been in for a shitty time. Arf arf arf arf!’

    Like

  66. 90
    Jon says:

    Three young men at the same time!?
    Angela you old fox!

    Like

  67. 91
    Tony Benn says:

    Another game of Scissors, Stone Gun?

    Like

  68. 92
    Michelangelo says:

    I’d put a ceiling of sistine goals

    Like

  69. 93
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Germany have gone ahead, Huntz.

    Like

  70. 94
    Geordie Boy says:

    Pope: So the Third Reich wasn’t the final one?

    Merkel: Nein. There will be one more. But we now call it the European Union.

    Like

  71. 95
    HenryV says:

    Is Merkel a Catholic?

    Like

  72. 96
    Fat Pang says:

    Merkel is a jack booted fascist *innocent face*

    Like

  73. 97
    Anonymous says:

    I do a fair Fred Dogers, but could never do that finger thing. 1-2-3, 3-1-2, 2-1-3 or something. Now, whatever happen to RustyTin?

    Like

  74. 99
    Adolph Hitler says:

    Pope: “You didn’t half make a Hunt out of Cameron over Jean Claude mein little frauhlein”

    Angie: “Sure did Popey”!

    Like

  75. 101
    Kent Brockman says:

    Pope says:’Fuck you’
    Merket replies: ‘Your dead’

    I for one welcome are EU overlords…

    Like

  76. 102
    Mycroft says:

    Pope begs for a 3 goal start and is offered a firing squad instead.

    Like

  77. 103
    What do I win? says:

    Merkel: And so the actress said to the bishop….

    Pope: Any hole’s a goal ?

    Like

  78. 104
    Old Notherner says:

    Never mind what Silvio said, I’ll do you in this many !

    Like

  79. 105
    Anonymous says:

    You may have beaten us at football but I have the keys to the kingdom …. what do you think about that Lard Arse….

    Like

  80. 106
    Big Jim says:

    Yes, that’s right I have now met three leaders who are German.

    You Angela, my predecessor and the headmaster of my school, Adolfo, who emigrated from Germany in April 1945 with his lovely wife Eva.

    Like

  81. 108
    David St Hubbins says:

    Pope: fancy crossing Biffin’s Bridge?
    Merkel: only if you’ll come in ze Panzer…

    Like

  82. 109
    Anything goes says:

    Pope: “Angela, the Argies use these three fingers to tap in World Cup winners.

    “Maradona called it the ‘Hand of God’. We refer to it colloquially as ‘Trinity’, but everyone would have thought he was pumped up on drugs and rambling if he’d used that term.”

    Like

  83. 110
    Cynic says:

    Join us and even Silvio will think you are a goer

    Like

  84. 111
    Henry Crun says:

    Pope: I helped this many Nazis with new identities.

    Like

  85. 114
    DDC says:

    Pope [singing]: “You’re once, twice, three times a geezerbird”

    Like

  86. 116
    Schlachtenbummler says:

    3 o’clock princess

    Like

  87. 118
    Argie says:

    How much you offering for this ring here?

    Like

  88. 119
    RobMiles says:

    Pope – There are so many old Nazi’s in Argentina, that we’ve both won whatever happens.

    Like

  89. 120
    man in a dress says:

    So it’s third time lucky for you Germans
    taking over England eh?

    Like

  90. 122
    Jeremy says:

    I call it the “shocker”

    Like

  91. 123
    CHRIST ON A BIKE! says:

    Pope: “We have three great forwards Chancellor Merkel, Messi, Higuain and Aguero. Your boys have no chance”

    Merkel: ” Yes, but vee have snipers in the ground to take care of them. They will be diving like they’ve been shot anyway!”

    Like

  92. 124

    “And just who did you think your father really was”

    Like

  93. 125
    illogical says:

    His Wholeiness obviously expecting the hand of god to favour his team.
    This could get Messy!

    Like

  94. 126
    Anonymous says:

    Merkel: “Ve haf started two world wars already”
    Pope: “Third time lucky?”

    Like

  95. 127
    Robbie says:

    “One our Fatherland”

    And “three Hail Messis”

    Like

  96. 128
    gildedtumbril says:

    “I work for Satan”, “So do I”
    Either way round..

    Like

  97. 129
    chav #503 says:

    Pope: Oh you use your index finger? My pussy finger’s the middle one.

    Like

  98. 130
    chav #503 says:

    Pope: Nothing’s worn under the cassock – it’s all in perfect working order, my dear Frau.

    Like

  99. 131
    chav #503 says:

    Merkel: Only 3 Nazis left in Argentina?

    Like

  100. 133
    Come on Lionel! says:

    Merkel (giggling on Papal wine): “So if Germany win, you really will show me your 3cm willie?”.

    Like

  101. 134
    Anonymous says:

    And on the third day

    Like

  102. 135
    Mrs. Merkel says:

    The winning goal? If you stretch me with 3 fingers like that, it is bound to be Messi.

    Like

  103. 136
    Chocolate Fireguard says:

    Berlusconi wouldn’t shag ya, Cameron wouldn’t shag ya, and I certainly can’t shag ya,so fuck of back to Berlin you unshaggable fat cow.

    Like

  104. 137
    Fabians are Evil says:

    OK I’ll give your team odds of 3 to 1

    Like

  105. 138
    Dodgy Pontiff says:

    Haha I best you David Cameron would back down, now I’m going to “six pack” you until you convert to catholicism.

    Like

  106. 139
    Always Use A Condom says:

    Growth – The Need To Cover The Country In Concrete

    If You Exam The Evidence All cars should be fitted with a catholic converter

    Like

  107. 140

    “Just three Hail Marys and I’ll be absolved from lying to Dave – what a nice old Pope you are”

    Like

  108. 141
    Anonymous says:

    Cameron took in three of my fingers compared to your one.

    Like

  109. 143
    spanows says:

    3 goals in 3 minutes the other night vs. Brazil but they told me it was a close shave.

    Like

  110. 144
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    “But Jean Claude Junckter reckons you can take three fingers” ?

    “No! no! your fondleness i believe it was only one , Like you , i’m still a semi virgin you know”

    Like

  111. 145
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Ah Mr Merkel ! We helped some of your relatives emigrate to south America

    Like

  112. 146
    Frau Mayonnaise-on the wrong side of the Iron Curtain until 1989 says:

    So, how do you think this new ‘Peaceful’ European WWIII is going? (PS. Am I just a bloke in a dress who’s quoting 2K-year-old bigoted view’s? or do I actually have something relevant to say?)

    Like

  113. 147
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    Now i have seen you up close , i see why priests prefer young boys

    Like

  114. 149
    I Roger Boys MP says:

    “Rock , Scissors , Paper , Stone” “Ah you naughty popey type person you get to spank me yet again”

    Like

  115. 151
    Fabians are Evil says:

    Angela here is an example of a good Christian act …. after Nigeria was eliminated from the world cup the Nigerian captain personally offered to refund all the expenses of fans that travelled to Brazil.

    He said he just needs their bank details and pin numbers to complete the transaction.

    Like

  116. 153
    Anonymous says:

    “Friday Caption Contest (World Cup Final Predictions Edition)”
    I may not be able to tell you who will win Angie, my angel. (Albeit some results have the hallmarks of a biblical betting scam). But I can say with all certainty, that Dave is right about curtailing interweb privacy. For how else are we expected to find out about that murky malevolence, being manifested by a Merkel?

    Like

  117. 154
    Tapestry says:

    Pope – Ratzinger had to ‘retire’. The Jesuit Superior went last week. I’m about to go. That’s three in a few months. The International Tribunal for Crimes of Church and State is doing bloody well, Angela.

    Merkel – I don’t murder children and rape them, so I should be OK.

    http://the-tap.blogspot.co.uk/2014/07/jesuit-superior-resigns-pope-may-resign.html

    Like

  118. 156
    Enemy of the State says:

    Now Holy Father we only started two world wars’ Yes dear but you are going to start a third!!

    Like

  119. 157
    Anonymous says:

    Und mit Sie finden wir der einer heiliger Gott?

    Tre per prezzo uno – Patris, fillii et Spiritus Sancti !!

    Like

  120. 158
    Bloke says:

    “…and that’s when I said ‘Rolf, can you tell what it is yet?’….”

    Like

  121. 160
    Anonymous says:

    Ha Angela – I beat you there.

    I’ve been as drunk as a skunk at Three Munich Bier Festivals.

    Like

  122. 161
    Bloke says:

    ‘…so there was Rolf wearing his didgeridoo and he thought it was my middle finger!’

    Like


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Ralph Miliband on the English…

“The Englishman is a rabid nationalist. They are perhaps the most nationalist people in the world.”



Left on Left says:

The lefties are attacking because the panellist is a millionaire and lives in a London home worth upwards of two million. Someone had best tell them he’s called Ed Miliband.


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