July 3rd, 2014

Report: Another Tory Guilty of Assaulting Ex-Girlfriend

Surrey Herald & News are reporting that Asif Ayub, Tory councillor for Ashford East in Spelthorne, has been found guilty of five counts of assaulting his ex-girlfriend. Readers will remember Ayub as the Tory MP hopeful who described David Cameron as the Messiah at party conference in 2012. What is it at the moment with Tories and violently assaulting their girlfriends?


  1. 1
    Parliament is a Gay Disco says:

    What is it at the moment with Tories and violently assaulting their ex-girlfriends?

    Beards if you don’t mind!


  2. 3

    It needs a special type of woman to date a Tory politician. A sound knowledge of child psychology and self-defence is strongly advisable.


  3. 4
    Moley says:

    Looks like another customer for Google’s new “Pay to forget” service; a commercial winner if there ever was one.


  4. 5
    England is becumin a ferd world cess-pit innit says:

    What’s she so pissed about?

    In India women are hanged after they’ve been assaulted


  5. 6
    Anonymous says:

    Will this be enough to trigger a recall under the new super spiffy rules. If not exactly how many counts of assault are required?


  6. 8
    A public sector worker says:

    Strike! Strike! Strike! Strike!
    Maggie out! Maggie out! Maggie Out!


  7. 9
    Chukka Umbrella says:

    We’re not in Kansas anymore, Toto.


  8. 11
    Latin for Dummies says:




  9. 12

    Wichitashire 352 and 299-7 beat Galveston 297 and 105 (Ajmal 7-34) by 249 runs.


  10. 14
    Dave the Ike says:

    Bring back Gordo Brown – with our gold.
    Tony is hoping to advise Egypt! OMG!
    Chris Bryant – Ambassador to Nigeria.


  11. 15
    Lord Pantsdown says:

    ..Now is not the time for an inquiry into historic pedalo activity..{because there’s an election coming}.. for all sorts of very good reasons ..{mainly, we are Lib dems so if there has been perversion guess who’s party is most likely to be involved}

    I think we should leave the police to get on with their job..{of covering up or ignoring historic abuse}

    Thankyou {fuck you}


  12. 17
    Nigel Farage says:

    The Tories can’t assault anyone else at the moment

    So they assault their womenfolk

    What a party surrounding themselces with criminals like Murdoch and Coulson as well


  13. 19
    Tony Smooth says:

    Hey! what stinks in here?

    Sorry I haven’t been around this place lately.
    I’ve been looking for a better blog!

    found one called Fox News Radio blog.
    they are brill..

    well, Can’t stay..I can only be in the UK for 60 seconds at a time. For Tax purposes..



    • 36
      Silvio Smooth says:

      Tone! How goes it with the WMD – Ways of Money Deliverence

      Pretty good it seems to me, must catch up soon for some bunga bunga!!



  14. 20
    The LibDems says:

    The Tories’ behaviour is disgraceful. Women are not there to be slapped around. They are there to be fondled and pressured into sex in return for career advancement.


    • 32
      Gloria de Piero says:

      You were no good to me when I came calling.


      • 53
        Dave the Ike says:

        I think that Sylvia woman knew a few names. So did her mother.
        As Persil says: It’ll all come out in the wash.
        Who’s that world renowned entertainer they keep mumbling about? Not Ivor Fourskin – the other ‘bloke?


      • 134
        Bob cuntface Crow says:

        You look like the sort of girl who would fart in your face on purpose while you lick her fanny.


    • 33
      Jo Swindle says:

      I’ll look into it..


  15. 22
    Tooting Tony from Tel Aviv says:

    I’m getting another bung from President Sisi of Egypt

    He hss only killed a few thousand people

    Not hundreds of thiusands like me

    But I still need bungs


  16. 25
    Neil Down says:

    Maybe we should be relieved to know there are still one or two Tories who are interested in women, even if they are rough with them. I was beginning to think the party could be renamed La Cage Aux Folles.


  17. 28
    MEOW says:

    They have been infected by the Lib Dems in Coalition


  18. 29
    Mad Bulging Eyes Mehdi says:

    1961 7 Mosques in UK

    2014 ONS, not to be trusted, but believed in excess of One Thousand Five hundred.

    The sooner it is realised by politicians that this evil cult is wholly incompatable and without any possibiliy of true integration with the British way of life!!

    Time to stop placing token Muslims in positions just to get votes, the jihadis will eventually bite them in the bum! or worse!

    Political talk is cheap, no action still with Clit lopping!


    …and now thanks to European Court of Human Right ( for a change) the evil face veil could simply be banned now in the UK.

    The Conservatives of anyone, should have jumped on this and started enacting legislation TODAY, another move to help women oppressed by this evil, cult!


    • 50

      Equally, wearing a Guy Fawkes mask in public would be a crime.

      Be careful what you wish for.


      • 59
        Mad Bulging Eyes Mehdi says:

        Not much to worry about, as in France, it would have to be all facial cover-ups in public places, surely quite a sane approach and passes no problems with European Courts.

        Sort of think UK government would do is ( if balls could be gown) ban the niquab then use it as an excuse to moan about Human Rights when it is thrown out of court as being discriminatory!

        Whether by design or just being thick, they never seem to be able to work around how European Human Rights Court works.

        So, all in all, I’m still wishing for it, but don’t worry, it will never happen!!!


        • 92
          Riots R Us says:

          I don’t see why it wont happen, the real idea behind this is to have face covering made illegal. The Burqa thing is just to get public backing. Its really aimed at people who wear crash helmets or use full face covering at demos, think London water cannon, this is the way policing is going.


      • 67
        Albert's chainsaw sharpeners says:

        For something to be illegal it requires officialdom to catch whoever is doing the illegal thing we have no plod any more and unless it’s speeding then what’s left of plod do a disappearing act, it’s illegal to smoke in a public market as some people were doing today but unless caught by officialdom then nobody was bothered.


      • 152
        Anonymous says:

        Exactly. The mythical muslim threat is being used a tool to suppress all our liberties. Ditto “Trojan horse” schools. All bollocks. All lies. All designed to destroy our freedom. Ditto the imminent false flag and the escalation of the security theatre.


    • 55
      CorporealChris says:

      Bring PIE back – meat and veg for everyone.!


  19. 30
    Witty Monker says:

    Is the one on the left his ex? I’ll comfort her (if the wife will let me).


  20. 38
    The nasty party is back? says:

    When Labour hit out they don’t leave any physical bruises just psychological scars.


  21. 47

    I may be a traditionalist but wern’t Tory scandals about sex in the past and Labour about money. Now they all just beat each other up or go native on the Colombian marching dust.


  22. 51

    Well said! I never harm my ex-girlfriends. I have a firing squad for that.


  23. 52
    The Lives of Others says:

    Speaking of mad mozzies this is a must see:


    GCHQ can trawl this blog, read our emails, facebook, twitter, google, smart phones, dumb phones, you name it they watch us, the ordinary law abiding people HOWEVER:

    This mad mozzie, wife of 7/7 bomber is able to change identities, marry another mad mozzie, get pregnat three times, come back to UK to have baby on the NHS, live in South Africa on false passport, run up fraudulent debts, collect benefits when nipping back to the UK.

    Flushes sim cards and phones down toilet as required and what are GCHQ MI5 doing about it? Answer not a lot, I expect eventually like Mr Hook Hane will take the Yanks to deal with the problem!!




  24. 58
    ExpatAndGlad says:

    This nonsense from the BBC re Chuka’s Wichiti/Worcester screw-up


    “The prime minister has also made a Worcester related faux pas in the past.

    David Cameron appeared on the David Letterman Show in America in 2012 and gave the wrong name for the composer of the music to Rule Britannia, naming Edward Elgar instead of Thomas Arne. Edward Elgar was from Worcester.” HOW IS THIS RELEVANT?

    Only the leftie BBC could make a story about Chuka actually one about the Tories.


    • 64
      But... says:

      Cameron’s a Tory?


      • 69
        M Thatcher says:

        couldn’t have put it better myself….apart from “bollox”


        • 192

          The Cameron simile is not really the story here though your point is absolutely nail on head. Cast back and think had that been a lefties would they have ever trawled to find something similar. Nope

          I just think that makes your point and reinforces it in nuclear concrete


  25. 71
    Jimmy says:

    For 18 years we tolerated the abuse. Convinced ourselves that they only did it because they cared, or that somehow it was our fault. Finally we plucked up the courage to throw them out. Sure enough they came crawling back, saying they were sorry, they’d changed, it would be different this time. And we fell for it. Will we never learn?


  26. 72
  27. 75
    ToryTruth says:

    Because they [tories] are closet fags who hate women


    • 95
      The British media are cunts says:

      Like Muslims then?


    • 104
      Gok Wan says:

      Errr….. and what is wrong with fags you fucking homophobic twat?


      • 107
        the dept for making up meaningless words and phrases says:

        ‘Homophobic’, means what exactly in medical terms?


        • 197
          M­a­­q­b­o­­ul says:

          It means you have a perfectly rational fear of some bloke sliding his erect cock up yer arse.


    • 113
      Gok Wan says:

      You need to calm down and stop being so hateful, I mean someone could get offended by that homophobic comment of yours and report you to the police and Guido would then have to hand them your IP address. Things could get very messy rather quickly.
      But I promise I personally won’t report you to the police as long as you repeat after me the line “one in the bum and no harm done” one hundred times.


  28. 76
    ed milliband/nick clegg/david cameron says:

    It’s ok it’s part of his culture anybody who says different is waaacist


  29. 78
    Sir Roger de Senseless says:

    Is that her on his right? Exceedingly pretty! What’s up with the bloke that he can’t think of anything more constructive or enjoyable to do with her than thump her?


  30. 85
    Blimey says:

    If he had been pissed and patted a woman on the bum this would be a real shock horror story. Apparently anything to do with sex is far worse than violence?


  31. 88
    Monty says:

    This gentleman is not the messiah….he’s a very naughty boy


  32. 91
    non taxable pikey says:

    1 billion for Glasgow, aka a bribe for your vote. Remember oh Jockanese people Camoron is famous for cast iron guarantees. He’s an expert in smoke and mirrors.


    • 93
      How to embarrass a Scot ask him if he vote NO says:

      Remember Scotland, Camoron giveth and Camoron will take away as soon as you vote NO, if you believe him and his U turns then serves you right, your pockets will need to be deep as he will get the money back.


    • 97
      Scotland "the brave" says:

      The fun the English will have if the Scots vote NO, all the Scots tunes, like Scotland the brave will be rewritten.


    • 168
      Just saying says:

      Expert, X, an unknown quantity, Spurt, a drip under intense pressure


  33. 96
    cured lefty says:

    Hillary about to receive a full body lickover from the presenters of the one show….I walked out when the stupid female ,arse parked on some impressive steps , autocue reader declared ” after the damage of the bush years hillary blah blah bladdy”
    I don’t pay license money for lefty c, unts to pass off blatant bias as objective journalism

    This morning rad 4 our very own jeremy akkbarbowen “the killing of the Palestinian youth..blah in context blah raised tensions blah blah the deaths of the three blahhhh “.
    bbc …..utter shower of fucks


    • 236
      Bob cuntface Crow says:

      You are not a fan are you? The BBC is the envy of the world,it must be true,I heard someone on the BBC tell me so,


  34. 100
    The British media are cunts says:

    When will an airline operator be brave enough to offer a Muslim free service?


  35. 106
    Party of Dave still letting in 510,000 immigrants per year says:

    Anyway Dave’s been in a good four years now and I was wondering how are those immigration figures were doing?


  36. 110
    DC says:

    Stop whining Guido, this was just a cultural misunderstanding. An “Honour thrashing”. These Johnny foreigners are allowed to be callow wife-batterers, it’s in the rules, if we object we are the ones preaching hate and they are poor, innocent, good men… pah!!!”


    • 114
      Gok Wan says:

      My little chocolate starfish takes a damn good thrashing everyday and it doesn’t bother me sweetie pie :)


  37. 111
    These news stories are chicken feed says:

    why is nobody talking about this? Geoffrey Dickens had London flat and constituency home both broken into and ransacked in same week….



    • 127
      Cinna says:

      “And separately, Labour has repeated its long-standing demand for a review into the findings of existing abuse inquiries to make sure child protection is adequate in future”.

      They could have H*arman, D*romey on the review. Their input would be invaluable.


      • 131
        Harriet Harmong and her husband Mrs Jack Dromey says:

        We were right to promote child abuse, and right to oppose child abuse.


  38. 115

    It is a shame that Sally Bercow doesnt get smacked!


  39. 116
    altruism in industry says:

    anyway all this shite is symptomatic of a society going down the toilet


  40. 120

    Tories are a que’er party.
    Labour are a que’er party.
    LibDems are a very que’er party.

    Vote UKIP :-D

    They value heterosexuals equally, unlike any of the above.


    • 137

      This is much more interesting:


      It has an English Executive Summary at the end – rest is worth running through a translator.

      Now – Most of the J’ihadi stuff is tied to the TWRA which was set up in V’ienna with very curious funding by a S’udanese chappy back in 1987.

      Now – you will find TWRA tied into black arms shipments to B’osnian M’uslims (!ranian arms mainly, bypassing emargo’s etc.) during the 90’s conflict, with question marks for H’ayden among others.

      Strange thing about Sudan were the switches in funding during the 80s / 90s – tied in with T’urabi coup etc. and the connection with Egypt’s more extreme S’alafist branches.

      The main S’alafi M’osque in V’ienna is located opposite one of their Min. D’efence buildings. Nice.

      Worth having a look and a think, perhaps recalling things like the Siege of Vienna. This is how the long game works, and perhaps J’uncker and his controllers may like to take note.

      Refer back to the lighthouse for further detail.

      Vote UKIP :-D


      • 149

        Another way to view those events.

        The libel came up, and it could have been defended against in court.

        But – someone realized what the real game was, and decided to pay penance instead and kill the matter off early.

        It was more about manipulating public opinion than money or principal. In a way Mac’Alpine fell for it after he made his eminent offer.

        Mistakes were made, but the whole thing was some sort of op from the start. For instance, if his name was actually trending when S’ally B sent the infamous tweet – then who or ‘what’ got that trending. (Many robots on Twitter…)

        If it wasn’t – then big question mark over the B’ercow household. Massive.

        Vote UKIP :-D


        • 173

          Bell’s legacy didn’t survive O’bama. Perhaps a biography of her would be a suitable State gift to the US this Christmas ?

          Agreed – she should not be forgotten.

          In what was being spoken of earlier though it was more the collapsing of the Caliphate that was of concern. Bell was indirectly involved in that but mainly worked to build the buffer with the A’rabian peninsular. Lawrence was right about the K’urds.

          I’raq as a small confederacy might have been much more stable and workable long term solution. Too late for that now.

          Vote UKIP :-D


    • 138
      un Official says:

      Something Official says:
      Your comment is awaiting moderation.
      July 3, 2014 at 8:59 pm

      One block vote for straights
      One for funny folk
      One for undecided

      Four for Nige

      and readers how do you fit in


  41. 128
    Bill Quango MP says:

    then why didn’t he raise the matter again?
    Or you sonny!

    If you knew this was ‘explosive’ then why wait another 20 years after passing it along?

    I really hope it isn’t you that has found the ‘real’ dodgy dossier. the one with cross out 45 years ..write in 45 minutes…and then here..cross out no in “No weapons of mass destruction are to be found. ”
    Shred pages 4,5,6 of the Hans Blick findings..and change this bit..”poses no threat” to top secret – MPs eyes only .. Saddam is planning an anthrax attack on London tube next week unless we can invade first..keep this secret or there will be panic..and put something in about Dr K being a homo-transsexual-paid by the KGB spy for moss-ad or something like that..Ok”



    • 230
      anon says:

      I seem to remember David Icke was claiming that child abuse was rampant at the beeb and in parliament in the 90’s.

      No lizards but plenty of boy buggerers.


    • 233
      Rob says:

      All he had to do was stand up in the HoC and say it. Parliamentary privilege. If it was as bad as they claim he could have blown the whole gaff.

      So why didn’t he do it? Handing over the file, knowing its contents, was basically saying “not my problem, Guv”


      • 240
        Count Raymond of Tolouse says:

        And handing over the dossier/file to someone alleged (the allegations are all over the Internet at least for the time being) to be implicated, up to his neck, in the very same scandal incredibly stupid.


  42. 129
    Question Crime says:

    Grab the popcorn for a fierce Question Time tonight. Peter Hitchens, someone from the NUT, Bernard Jenkin, Postie and Jo Swinson are on panel. Hitchens and the NUT rep should provide a lot of fireworks.


  43. 130
    nell says:

    Denis Skinner , the last Working Class Labour MP now removed from the NEC.

    Chuckusyamoney , that clubbing millionaire MP who thinks the folks of the UK are trash and wants only to party with millionaires in marbella,believes he has the credentials to be the next labour party PM!! Ho Hum!!!


    • 135
      Labour really are fucked says:

      “that clubbing tax-dodging millionaire liar who wears bespoke £2,500 suits and MP ”

      There we go. Fixed it for you.


      • 146
        altruism in industry says:

        my guess is that his confidence is from him being sponsored by the spooks


  44. 132
  45. 141
    non taxable pikey says:

    Yesterday Eric Pickles said he thought it would be fun to run against David Cameron for the leadership of the Tory party.

    Personally I think it would be a fuck of a lot funnier to just watch Eric Pickles running.


  46. 142
    cured lefty says:

    I had a particularly strange dream last …mandelbum and brittain being interviewed on radio 4 concerning child abuse ..I for the life of me could barely distinguish their speech patterns !


  47. 148
    Here Today says:

    RT reporting N S A consider all anon users of web networks as extre mists, but strangely only Germ an users!


  48. 155

    We will announce by popular demand our new muzz free airline tomorrow, we expect complete sell-booking out by mid day.


    • 191
      John Bellingham says:

      Would you like Pork or Pork for your meal sir?


      • 201
        It's a long way to tip a hairy says:

        {Tower} Ham{lets} and chips sound just the job. A nice cup of Darjeeling to follow please.


  49. 157
    Anon. says:

    Who is Nick Clegg protecting?


    • 161

      No one ?

      Vote UKIP :-D


    • 169
      Even Guido has become part of the media smokescreen says:

      Agree. Clegg (and for that matter he Dib Lems) have never been in tune with the electorate – proportional represntation, Europe, taxes, you name it. Voting for them is just a desperate alternative to not voting at all or refusing to vote for the other two. Their party is full of sexual deviants so stands to reason they don’t want an investigation. We should start a shaming campaign of all MPs who don’t sign up – this will be at least the 5th time this parliament by my reckoning that Cameron eventually joins the majority out of expediency.


  50. 158
    davy jones rocking it says:


  51. 159

    This is one seriously bad-ass chap:


    Thinking he had nothing to lose because he was going to die:

    ‘The soldier fired more than 400 rounds, launched 17 grenades and detonated a mine to thwart the T’aliban assault on his checkpoint near B’abaji in H’elmand Province, southern A’fghanistan, last S’eptember.’

    In the play book that is perhaps known as ‘the berserker’.

    He killed 30 T’aliban, beating the last of them away with the tripod of his machine gun after he ran out of ammunition.

    Awarded the Conspicuous Gallantry Cross by the Queen.

    Vote UKIP :-D


  52. 167
    Anon. says:

    Senior Tory MP caught with child sex videos.



  53. 172
    Anon. says:

    Are you worried about the cost @MegMunnMp ?



  54. 175
    By his reaction I think it fair to say Chuka is unable to laugh at himself says:


  55. 176
  56. 177
    Wichita Woman says:


  57. 182
    Pet Watch says:

    Abbott on this week with her latest Wig.


    • 204
      It's a long way to tip a hairy says:

      She tried (in her bestest oh so serious voice mode) to ask a question at PMQs this week, but nobody could hear word as all the MPs were laughing so loud. Something to do with the member for Newbury.


  58. 183
    She's right you know. says:


    • 205
      It's a long way to tip a hairy says:

      When these female colossi play the same number sets per match as the men, then there may be something in equal remuneration. Meanwhile 3/5ths should be about right for the leggy screechers.


  59. 188
    Jack 'the pratt' Dromey. says:

    I can’t understand all this attacking ex partners, for God’s sake! Nasty and violent.
    As far as I am concerned, my marriage is ideal – Harriet defends depraved PIE members, whilst I get very excited about willies of a darker hue. Life is so good!


  60. 190
    Ed Mili is Toast says:


  61. 195
    albacore says:

    Just testing to see if with Fawkes and his fatties
    My poor old monicker has become non gratis


  62. 196
    Harriet Harman says:

    Just waiting for the story on politicians’ collective outings to Morocco as part of he vibrant sex tourism trade. Egypand and Tunisia got a fair bit of that trade too. All part of the insidious PIE.


  63. 199
    albacore says:

    Is it Osborne’s terror of multiplication
    Or a religion’s surgical devastation
    Of countless young females’ unmentionable bits
    That turns moderators here into total tits?


    • 210
      The tit in no. 10 who claims to be Christian without having understood a word of Christian teachings says:

      Multiplication is something which must be stamped out.


  64. 209
    albacore says:

    Now then, folks, try not to roll about with mirth
    Playing with trains is more than Cameron’s worth
    Straight up, no kidding, it’s really not a joke
    His underlings think he’s a man made of smoke



    • 219
      John Deakin says:

      Curious – the train in that picture doesn’t seem to have moved for a year or more.
      Has someone stolen the track ?


  65. 212
    Eric Pickles says:

    I was told that exercise helps with your decision making.

    It’s true.

    After going to the gym earlier I’ve decided I’m never going again.


  66. 213
    Well I Never ! says:

    Ex-Tory minister ‘pictured in child sex abuse video’ confiscated by customs at Dover in 1982 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MoCyPHLs8wA


  67. 214
    Guido Fawkes says:

    Really impressed by Alan Johnson on BBC Question Time last night. He’s the Labour Party I recognise and would vote for…


    • 216
      Postman Pat says:

      Your cheque is in the post.


    • 217
      Labour leader hunt says:

      ….Too vain and not bright enough, but a nice man nonetheless!


      • 220
        Prime Minister David Cameron says:

        Were Alan Johnson to become Labour leader, their chances of a successful General Election would increase from 10% to 100% I believe.


        • 225
          Don T.B. Seely says:

          And if arseholes were earholes you’d have shit running down your neck.


        • 227
          Dave. says:

          Alan Johnson is totally unsuitable to be P.M.

          The man actually did real work in Tesco and as a Postman! We just cannot have people with experience like that in the real world.

          He didn’t go to Eton and Oxford, and worst of all he is not a PPE graduate. Even Milicvnt has got a PPE.

          Worst of all he’s straight. Everyone knows that we can only have Pride enthusiasts in the job.


    • 222
      Scotland "the brave" says:

      Yur avin a larf.


  68. 218
    24 years says:

    Rolf Harris left his home in Bray by boat this morning as he makes his way to court for sentencing. Judge has told him to expect jail.


  69. 223
    ERIC PICKLES says:

    Allah allows him to beat his wife , girlfriend , children or slaves
    what the fuck is your problem ?


  70. 231
    Scotland the bribed says:

    When will it all end, Football, bloody tennis and a white elephant of a ship, no planes and no one to run it, used as a bribe, for Scotland to say NO, built in Scotland now frog cycling, in Yorkshire of all places , bloody television.


  71. 241

    If they’d been UKIP members, the Tory dirty tricks team would ensure that every media outlet in the country had full details.


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