June 23rd, 2014

IDS’s Coke Party

As IDS and Trigger go head to head at DWP questions this afternoon, Guido hears word of a peace offering. Having spent the last year tearing strips off each other in the Commons chamber and on the airwaves, when Rachel Reeves and the Labour shadow DWP team came to the department for a briefing, IDS thought he would ease the tension with a gift. He jollily presented her with personalised ‘Iain’ and ‘Rachel’ Coke bottles. No such gift for Chris Bryant who tagged along, and grumpily tells Guido: “The meeting had been cancelled by them three times already. Not exactly on time and on budget…” And to think they say “Things go better with Coke”.


  1. 1
    Bill Quango MP says:

    For the first time ever the national side, the labour party, has failed to win any of their opening matches.

    Under Ed Miliband’s leadership the Labour party lost out in both the Euro vote and Local election group A matches against a struggling, only 55% fit for office , David Cameron, and against a team FIFA ranked 129th – UKIP.

    Ed Miliband said he was gutted to have to quit so early. “losing the first two means I can’t be qualified to lead the Labour party into the last 2016.”

    There have been calls amongst the left wing press for Miliband to resign and make way for someone good.
    However a spokesman for Unite, the professional labour MP’s association, made it clear that Miliband would be staying ‘for now.’

    “With the Shad-Cab team that he had available , a mix of old has-beens and young, fresh faced, Spaddy youths, we believe that Ed did as well as he could. He tried a lot of new, innovative left wing tactics that sadly, if predictably, just didn’t work out.

    But we believe Ed is building a powerful team for the future when Labour may once again have world class, working class, politicians, like it did in the 1966 Wilson government. ”

    Asked if the influx of highly paid foreign-holiday type politicians into Westminster has reduced the selection of available manual trades types, Ed said

    ‘Obviously this has had an effect. Who wants to go down a mine when you can become a special adviser straight from university? Write a few silly articles for a lefty think-tank. Be parachuted into a safe rust-belt constituency, and become a junior shadow nobody for nothing important on £70 grand plus a year?”

    Ed Miliband faces the Scottish Nationalists in a pointless final contest on Thursday, the results of which are a forgone conclusion.

  2. 2
    Rachel Reevezzzzzzz says:

    How now brown cow

  3. 3
    Anonymous says:

    You dancer.

  4. 4
    Anonymous says:

    IDS = Iain Duncan Shite -> White Top

  5. 5
    Steve Miliband says:

    The BBC are gutted as they will have to come home early. On the plus side, they can get to Glastonbury fro the weekend.

  6. 6
    IDShite says:

    I’m not a brown cow, i am a white and yellow Pugg

  7. 7
    Where's my fuckin owl says:

    Respect the Rule of Law Mr Cameron.

    Sue Turton has been found guilty of a crime committed in Egypt by an Egyptian Court.

    We are not interested in whether you are appauled or whatever.

    Just respect the Rule of Law .

    Send her back just like those nat west bankers who were sent to Usa.

  8. 8
    Will he go? says:

    David Mellor says IDS is not capable of being a Minister.

    Good News all around would be this chap resigning.

  9. 9
    Where's my fuckin owl says:

    Awkxard bastards those Christians.

    Always moaning and after your money.

  10. 10
    Abolish the licence fee says:

    No.10 Says PM May Campaign to Leave EU

    nd slide for
    the Conservatives

  11. 11
    Major John Goods News story says:

    Duncan Smith should cross the House of Commons floor and become UKIP leader in the House.

    Please go.

  12. 12
    Chancellor says:

    This chap, IDS, smells of fish

  13. 13
    jgm2 says:

    And then again, he may not.

  14. 14
    Made in Japan says:

    I’m made in Japan

  15. 15
    IDS brain says:


  16. 16
    IDS fished says:

    My wife’s family secured me my MPs seat. Never been paid to do anything else. Can’t answer the previous comment of being very very cheap. Not good, no definitely not good.

  17. 17
    IDS DWP motto says:

    Death to the in-capable first

  18. 18
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:

    Why is it that scrounging, work shy leftards all appear to have an issue with IDS? Is it because he’s making people work for a living rather than scrounging off the hard work of others?

    Funny how many hard working people aren’t complaining isn’t it you lefty mongs?

  19. 19
    SPG Plod says:

    Miliband IS the Roy Hodgson of politics.

    Nice enough chap. Not very good.

  20. 20
    Leave NATO now says:

    At school on Isle of Anglesey I was teased as being a big zit.

  21. 21
    Sick of the greed and lies(still) says:

    At least he spent 7 years in the Army. Most of the Politicians today have never done a job outside Westminster.

  22. 22
    Iain Duncan Shite says:

    I claim my £39.00 breakfast every day… Suckers!

  23. 23
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:

    I think you’ll find that was the motto of Andy Burnhams NHS. Or is the motto of the Labour run Welsh NHS?

  24. 24
    Rickytshirt says:

    Poor Roy. He might not be Sir Alf Ramsey, but to compare him to that f@ckweasel is a bit ‘arsh imo.

  25. 25
    Iain Duncan Shite says:

    And I’ve wasted £500,000,000.00 doing it so far.

    Let me see, that’s 12820512.82051282 tax payer paid breakfasts I could have claimed for…

  26. 26
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:

    There is nothing nice to be found in the nature of socialists. They are evil to the core.

  27. 27
    Bert says:

    It says so on your bottom, so it must be true.

  28. 28
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:

    Wasted how exactly?

  29. 29
    Bert says:

    ^^ A graduate of the Edward Balls School of Sums.

  30. 30
    IDS secretary says:

    He has reduced his breakfast meal claim by 40 pence since 2010.

  31. 31
    Fishy says:

    Does anyone believe anything that Underpants Bryant says?

  32. 32
    IDS secretary i hope for not very long says:

    Paying out tax payers money on undelivered computer systems.

  33. 33
    Rachael Reeves says:

    Set ONS on to DWP, now.

  34. 34
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:

    So your solution would be what?

  35. 35
    heard all before from Duncan Shite says:

    I promise”on budget on time”

  36. 36
    Sovietsalami63 says:

    sovietsalami63. Here,
    firstly IDS couldn’t possibly have a brain as all the Tories don’t have brains, and they’re beginning to Resemble the England 2014 World Cup football team , they can’t play for love nor money ,they’re totally fin useless , yet again and again and again .
    we don’t ask for much , yet the Tories users and football losers , do.
    Play the white man , that’s what they’ve been doing for a century, wasters £££.

  37. 37
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Not even his underpants believe what he says.

  38. 38
    Revelling in the joys of buttock sex says:

    Hear ! Hear !

  39. 39
    Iain Duncan Shite says:

    Make me pay it back!

  40. 40
    Socialism is theft says:

    Anyone who has ever played poker can see this bluff a mile away. I will only believe it if he calls for a referendum BEFORE the GE.

  41. 41
    Replace IDS with Brown says:

    Invite Gordon Brown to run the commissioning of DWP projects, as he is committed to the reforms.

    An excellent way to reclaim some of his recked reputation

  42. 42
  43. 43
    The Growler says:

    Say Geedes, were those bottles of coke of the old recipe, if so, Gideon would probably like some, it gives you dry mouth talking all day. By old old recipe I mean well before you born Geedes ;-)

  44. 44
    binger says:

    Miliband is disgusted by his vision of the working class

    the drink, the drugs, the sex, he views them as one would view a sick dog in a dogs home

    my view of the working class is they want to work but they HAVE to rely on the state to give them back the wages they have already earned

  45. 45
    The Growler says:

    Very fishy indeed!

  46. 46
    The Growler says:

    You aren’t waycist are you

  47. 47
    The Growler says:

    Prime Minster?

  48. 48
    Guy News Room says:

    David Cameron ‘appalled’ by the low standards of Owen Jones’ tweets.

    This will gain cross party support.

  49. 49
    The Growler says:

    IDS, you as credible as little Jimmy G Brown

  50. 50
    The Growler says:

    Yup, Nige would whip him into shape, but he doesn’t want any more embarrassments in his party.

  51. 51

    Wrong ! The working class get nothing from the state , you are confusing them with the Labour bred chav moron underclass, who would not even exist if it were not for the benefits system!

  52. 52


    This will come as a shock to the Lemon Party Little Englanders here but apparently FIFA has decided to continue the competition without you. a shock I know but there it is.

  53. 53
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:

    Fuck off you retard.

  54. 54
    The Growler says:

    You were a part time MP for years, it’s a full time job if done properly so you are a right one to talk of lefty slackers, come on Tim jump to it!

  55. 55
    “Things go better with Coke” says:

    they do in manchester pal!

  56. 56
    jgm2 says:

    Because he’s lying. Just like Brown and Labour’s Lisbon referendum.

  57. 57
    A1 says:

    …Which means you are far more reliable than British and possibly even German.

  58. 58
    Owen Jones,Socialist turned Capitalist says:

    It’s all very well calling for David Cameron’s head but what is the alternative? Can’t see many outstanding Tory toffs willing to put their head above the parapet.

  59. 59
    Anonymous says:

    It would be very unwise to place any credence on the no. 10 statement.
    In fact I wouldn’t believe it even if “will” replaced “May”.

  60. 60
    Them was the days my fren says:

    Older viewers will recall that Sir Alf had a great team of honourable and proud to represent England footballers – unlike Woy who has to manage a team of feeble overpaid pansies. Not at all surprised they went out early; can’t imagine why anyone would waste their hard earned going all that way just to watch the international sprawling and diving championships.

  61. 61
  62. 62
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:

    Are you arguing with yourself Jimmy?

  63. 63
    jgm2 says:

    FIFA are even more corrupt than Labour.

  64. 64
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:

    I’m not actually Tim Yeo..,you know!

  65. 65
    Tony Blair, Nuremburg defendent says:

    Don’t be silly.

  66. 66
    Anonymous says:

    Why should they waste tinme briefing the shadow cabinet ??

    Bit like showing your hand at poker.

  67. 67





  68. 68

    The Three Lions are currently disconsolately dangling upside down between the England players legs .

    Should England lose to CostaCoffee this week the beasts will as one reposition themselves higher up the thighs to devour a very intimate set of highly pampered well paid body parts .

  69. 69

    In your day then Growler they would have called it Sarsparilla and sold it out of open barrels on market stalls in Petticoat Lane Market on a Sunday morning .
    Is that the one ?

  70. 70
    John Bellingham says:

    You are right. Anyone who wants to watch a bunch of overpaid pansies and losers can stay home and watch PMQ.

  71. 71

    such a terrible waste of taxpayers money – as you know he claimed it!

  72. 72
    Judge Jeffries says:

    I wonder if his army service is as valid as many of his cv entries.

    A tradition of guilding the lily follows his career which he has taken to new heights with his DWP statistics…

  73. 73
    Judge Jeffries says:

    He stopped the report from MP’s that said his reforms were undeliverable,over budget and of no value whatsoever to the tax payer.

    And they were the successful parts ……. he must have some juicy dirt to dish to have kept his job this long.

  74. 74
    Voice of reason says:

    She would put a glass eye to sleep.awful

  75. 75
    Anonymous says:

    “Things go better with Coke”.
    Especially once the lines have been drawn?

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