June 8th, 2014

Read Guido’s Column in the Sun on Sunday Online


Nine politics stories in Guido’s Sun on Sunday column this week, including why Theresa May’s sacked special adviser Fiona Cunningham was already on thin ice with Downing Street. Also in today’s column, don’t miss out on:


  • Red Prince Joe follows in Mum (Harman) & Dad’s (Dromey) red carpeted footsteps as councillor
  • Penny Mordaunt breaks backbench hearts
  • Eric Pickles still believes – 3 lions on a flag
  • Sayeeda Warsi is lost in translation
  • Why are Commons Select Committee chairman standing down from their coveted, well paid jobs just now? Follow the money…
  • Remember Eleanor Laing ran for deputy speaker, promising to step down if Nigel Evans was cleared? Has she forgotten?
  • Osborne steals Shapps’ glory
  • Parliament hiring 100 “buddies” to help new MPs to settle in

Also in today’s Sun on Sunday, nanny to PM’s kids in sex for sale shock. Politics for the people, just 70p down your local newsagents or online here


  1. 1
    David Axlegrease says:

  2. 2
    David Axlegrease says:

  3. 3

    Thanks for the information , I will never buy anything from Wickes ever again

  4. 4
  5. 5
    pookie snackumberger says:

    Does donkey-breath reeves think that the ‘traditional’ labour voter is familiar with the term “raison d’etre'” ?

  6. 6
    the fat homunculine filth columnist says:

    The Mendacious Smearing Media has lost its raison d’être.
    Long live the Mendacious Smearing Media.

  7. 7
    Nick Clegg, Cockroach-in-Chief, Pervs Я Us says:

    The LibDems have lost their raison d’être.
    Long live the LibDems.

  8. 8
    BBC can't spell Umunna says:

  9. 9
    Diane Fatbutt says:

    You’ll never see me on thin ice.

  10. 10
    Botus says:

    The thin ice was due to global warming silly :)

  11. 11
    Like rats in a sack says:

  12. 12
    Local Northern Yokel says:

    The town centres struggle because the shops are full of overpriced crap that no one wants to buy. You have to go to outlet retail parks to find decent quality.
    Goods are overpriced because labour councils charge silly business rates. They also enlarge city centre zones so the higher rates can be charged over a wider area.
    Then they wonder why city centres fail. Simple everything is taxed till growth stalls. It’s the Labour way.

  13. 13
    Here is BBC home service says:

    The town centres were destroyed by Liebour, they attacked parking with sky high parking charges and gest apo enforcement by using contractors to make sure they squeezed every penny out of the car owner and high business rates , where the only ones that can afford these town centre prices is charity shops which seem to be big business and are making money, out of town private shopping centres are always busy, the only place I can think that’s latched onto chucking Liebours policy out of the window, with free parking and new builds around the town centre is WIDNES, always busy, parking free, it works but goes against Liebours value of pure greed.

  14. 14
    Anonymous says:

  15. 15
    The British media are cunts says:

    City and town centres are full of begging dross and criminals with gutless plods not in sight.

  16. 16
    rick says:

    Always been a big fan of the RamZ. One day, debates like this will be allowed in the MSM.

  17. 17
    Here is BBC home service says:

    The Sun went out when they started to attack UKIP on behalf of the LibLabCon, me no buy anymore

  18. 18
    I've never seen a food bank says:

    I’ve never seen a food bank.

    Where are they?

  19. 19
    McMental says:

    I think I lost my raison d’être, but I’m better now.

  20. 20
    Last to the bar is a three legged crow Set 'em up Joe Set 'em up Joe Set 'em up Joe says:

  21. 21


    Those who can do, those who can’ t think up crassly impracticable proposals for which they are paid obscene amounts of taxpayers money .

    ( Just to be clear I am now in the latter category )

  22. 22
    Obama Lite v Mrs Balls says:

  23. 23
    Handycock whipping it out says:

    I still have my raison d’etre but I am pretending not to, to avoid the court hearing a week tomorrow. Boaz.

  24. 24
    Orange Hain says:

    I am going to park myself in the long grass, because of the dodgy letter scandal Ed will kick me there anyway.

  25. 25

    oh yah daahlings .

    We erstwhike cloth capped working classers do not work any more .

    Instead we live on State largesse and lunch at Pret a Manger with supper at Le Caprice ….

  26. 26
    Dick Shunary says:

    raison d’être:

    The most important reason or purpose for someone or something’s existence

  27. 27
    illogical says:

    Raison d’etre is just a currant fad

  28. 28
    Cinna says:

    Well he would say that, wouldn’t he?

  29. 29
  30. 30
    Traditional Labour Voter says:

    Oi– a raisin detra’s some sort of scone wiff raisins in it, innit?

  31. 31
    Don Toni Blair in Sicily says:

    I am your raison d’etre


    Buggery, thuggery and skullduggery

    To which I should add adultery and pimping, both of which I am an expert in…

  32. 32

    Coz she borrowed twenty pairs of May s crocodile shoes without permission .

  33. 33
    Has SamCam seen the future? says:

  34. 34
    Somewhere in the universe there must surely be intelligent life - the search will continue elsewhere says:

    Either side of the River Inseine.

  35. 35
    non taxable pikey says:

    Unfortunately however she would float until the Japanese Whaler came along.

  36. 36

    Mark Littlewood is a prime example of an Orange Booker.

    You are a prime example of an Orange Fooker.

  37. 37
    non taxable pikey says:

    It’s not just Liebour councils that charge silly business rates. 17 shops empty in my small town and the council is very very blue.

  38. 38
    Socialism is theft says:

    Also high car park charges in town centres compared to retail parks, not to mention the traffic problem getting into the town centre.

  39. 39
    How to kill Town Centres....Part One says:

    The first thing that the incoming Labour Council taking over from the Conservative one did a few years back was to raise parking charges…result footfall in Town centre fell overnight and a nearby town that has no parking charges at all saw their trade increase..did the council learn anything ? Nope they then introduced charges for Disabled parking and reduced the time limits covered by each parking band therefore instead of 2 Hours costs £1 it became 1 Hour costs £1 and Two Hours £3…looks like the same fella is advising Miliband

  40. 40

    Yes .

    It will soon be superceded by ….je ne sais quoi….

  41. 41
    Socialism is theft says:

    Does he think the same of postal voting fraud? Silly question.

  42. 42
    How to kill Town Centres....Part One says:

    You forgot to mention Charity Shops; Pound Shops; Bars and Fast Food outlets

  43. 43

    Did Axelrod actually tweet that or is it photoshopped ?

    If he did tweet thst ‘ s the grey vote lost by labour ….

    You ve lost your ” big end ” Axel . Ever had the feeling you ‘ ve just bested Gerald Ratner !!

  44. 44
    Who is this Miliband person ? says:

    I bet that’s got Sepp Blatter really worried….

  45. 45
    Toxic Labour for Spongers, Parasites, Criminals, Layabouts & other Wasters says:

    We must have an immigration problem if scum like Chuka Uppeee say we haven’t.

  46. 46
    Toxic Labour for Spongers, Parasites, Criminals, Layabouts & other Wasters says:

    Rachel is a bit thick so I don’t know where she’s picking up this new language from. Maybe she’s trying to get an O level?

  47. 47
    Bing Crosby, Australian crooner says:

    You are a winner, Axelgrease…

    And here is iur Arnie Graf?

    Has he been interned?

  48. 48
    Tachybaptus says:

    But then she’d get flensed, and believe me, that really spoils your day.

  49. 49
    Tachybaptus says:

    48 was supposed to be a reply to 35, sorry.

  50. 50
    Michael Gove says:

    Buttock sex is part of Cameron’s Utopia.
    Utterly disgraceful, yet fits with Coalition policy perfectly.

  51. 51
    Taxfodder says:

    Its the Tory way too, plus stupidly high car parking charges Insurance and Banks taking a dip into profits….not to mention elf and safety and, shoplifters.

    Anybody opening a shop in the high street needs his/her brains examined.

  52. 52
    Just about placed third says:

    We do have a serious problem with thick lefty MPs who don’t seem to care about the country nor indeed know their arses from their elbows. But many of them are really first rate at preening in front of their mirrors.

  53. 53
    Soory Harriet, it's my bbc pal Santiago for me says:

    I know that you shouldn’t judge by looks but Joe Dromey looks to have inherited the worst genes from bpth parents.

  54. 54
    Hillary Rodham Clinton says:

    Hello Guido

    I want you to be the first to know that I want to be US President

    I have an impeccable record

    I voted for the Iraq War, the most important decision of the last 15 years

    I now admit that was “wrong”, dead wrong

    But I do not aplogise for the murder and mayhem

    That’s what qualifies me to be President

  55. 55
    Guy News Room says:

    Guido Fawkes accuses Theresa May of breaking ministerial code in Gove row http://gu.com/p/3qv34/tf

  56. 56
    U R My Reason For Living, tra la la says:

    Good job she didn’t say ‘mojo’ – all hell would have broken loose!

  57. 57
    inside out says:

    What about the dodgy voting in Tower Hamlets is that open to a new election,or am I being racist.

  58. 58
    Iain Duncan Smith says:

    Fight ! Fight ! Fight !
    How marvellous it is to see the Tories breaking apart in an election year.

  59. 59
    This is just disturbing says:

  60. 60

    What the hell is Ummuma talking about when he says union barons don’t influence the Labour Party ?!!

    Let s not be too infantile about this as it s reasonably easy for even a politician to follow:

    By the same token Ashcroft or Oakeshott or similar give large amounts of wonga to the Tories or Libdems so McCluskey or whomsoever give a couple of million from their members coffers to Labour …

    In both cases this buys not only influence but downright subservience .

    He who oays the piper etc … and it is crass idiocy for Chukka or anyone else to pretend otherwise .

  61. 61
    WAG says:

    What about an Orange Hooker?

  62. 62
    Jacques le Lad says:

    Vraiment? Sacre bleu. Quoi de neuf?

    PS: Il est ‘superSeded’.

    Au revoir mes amis.

  63. 63
    Peter Tapsell says:

    If Gove wanted to damage May’s leadership chances, improve Osborne’s chances & has no ambition for top job himself, he’s played a blinder

  64. 64
    Kate's garden of Venus says:

    The moral of this story, dear

    Is that you should always carry a figleaf in your Gucci handbag

  65. 65
    Jacques le Lad says:

    Hackcherly, with all his Ronseal covering, he is more an Orange Looker.

  66. 66
  67. 67
    Grant Crapps, Anti-tory Chairman says:

    We need some nudies of SamCam

    It’s the only way to lift our sagging vote…

  68. 68
    Marine Core says:

    Before we ponder further, can you please explain the details of exactly went wrong in Libya and caused your new appointed Ambassador to lose his life?

  69. 69

    Perhaps you d favour FIFA with the honour of holding the 2022 World Cup in the vast terrains of your palatial estates Mr Milliband . I m sure it could accomodate 15 football stadia each at keast one hours flying time from the other with complete social , hospitality and other infrastructure arrangements for a couple of million visitors all ready and insitu .

    Of course it would mezn that you and the family woukd be limited to the North East estate approaches facade for that month .

    Still , greater sacrifice hath no man ……. so can we have your Quotation please ?

  70. 70
    Pippa's Spectator bum says:

    Croco shoes?

    So 1990s

  71. 71
    Former Labour supporter. says:

    I’d never support anybody who knows what ‘ raison d’etre’ means.

  72. 72


    Fook you too — And no swearing on the (Christian ) Sabbath !!

  73. 73
    Squeaker Bercow says:

    I said no more, thanks.

  74. 74
    r says:

    “I now admit that was “wrong”, dead wrong”

    But it pleased your paymasters, didn’t it Hill. And our Tony did very well out of it too.

  75. 75
  76. 76
    Marine Core says:

    But she assured us, ever so sweetly whilst rolling her big black eyes and sweating very slightly, that it wasn’t in the manifesto, so nobody should believe a word of it. I don’t think Toby and Sol were unduly impressed by her contributions this morning so maybe she should perhaps refund 75% of her fee?

  77. 77
    Ed Millichild's balls have dropped says:

    I tried to look up Axelgrease’s twitter feed

    And my tablet said

    Something has gone wrong!

    Say that again…

  78. 78
    Labour win 2015 says:

    We ♥ Yvette

  79. 79
    Here is BBC home service says:

    Wait until May 2015, the public will damage all of Camoron’s Conservatives, vote, by voting anybody but Camorons Conservatives.

  80. 80
    Voltaire says:

    The British never had a raison d’etre…..and still don’t…

    That’s the whole problem…just look at this blog…

  81. 81
    The Bitch known as Mrs May says:

    638,000 lose EMA. 1.2 million students see tripling of fees 1 million young are jobless .3 million young peoples lives wrecked, All these will vote in 2015!!!!

  82. 82
    Taxfodder says:

    I quite like Fiona Cunningham, she ain’t shy or a pushover…

    MP’s and Media don’t like her much (especially media) she fights her corner and laughs in the face of bullying Westminster bullshite and/or editorial bollocks.

    Wavey Dave don’t like her at all, because she sees him as unconvincing and , sacking her just gives her all the free scope she needs to put the boot even more….which she will, ha ha.

    Oh Dave what a complete plonker…..Fiona ain’t bovvered you should be!

    and as for Daves much trumpeted harsh re-shuffle,……chaps deck chairs will be moved very vigorously indeed some people may even be asked to postpone their snooze till later in the day……

  83. 83
    Michael Gove says:

    Hear ! fucking well hear !

  84. 84
    AIPAC says:

    Of course

  85. 85
    Nigel Farage says:

    Nick Clegg can’t pull a pint either.

  86. 86
    Meanwhile says:

  87. 87
    Fiona Cunningham says:

    List of 25 Tory supporting employers ‘named and shamed’ for failing to pay minimum wage


  88. 88
    Fred the pensioner says:

    Maybe this will stop thick heads who are clearly incapable of benefiting from a university education to just stay away and leave the space for the cleverer ones.

  89. 89
  90. 90
    Meanwhile in Stoke Poges says:

  91. 91
    Fred the pensioner says:

    Oh dear, typical Sunday – blog post numbering fucked already. Can’t have a sensible discussion under these circs.

  92. 92
    Owen Jones says:

    That’s a fascist and racist comment old chap.

  93. 93
    Viperous Old Vince says:

    For completeness, we would have produced a list of LibDem supporting employers who have failed to pay the minimum wage but

    a) we have no supporters now Calamity Clegg has screwed up.
    b) there are no LibDem entrepreneurs; we suck at the State teat.

  94. 94
    Prime Minister David Cameron says:

    I’m glad that you find it funny, always good to hear from a Tory

  95. 95
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:

    She is thicker than a whale omelette and not nearly as tasty.

  96. 96

    I posted a nice concise one-word comment which demonstrated my amusement at the uncanny accuracy of your analysis. Unfortunately, the Automated Symposiarch which infests these parts of the blogosphere saw fit to consume it without trace. No expression of appreciation, no belch of satisfaction, not even a fat, smelly, sulphuric-laden fart.

    Accordingly, it is with considerable reluctance, not to mention some trepidation, that I have to record my high regard for your ingeniously crafted post with this somewhat more prolix response, something, one mistakenly assumed, that was not encouraged here.

  97. 97
    Diana Abbott says:

    Inside every thin woman is a fat woman trying to get out.

  98. 98
    Fred the UKIP pensioner says:

    Tragedy of Liverpool mum who died penniless after her benefits stopped


    Tory Scumbags.

  99. 99
    Tim Yeo-Yo says:

    Is that because it’s true?

  100. 100
    Vichy ‘Dave’ – preening himself - says:

    My stirring speeches on the Beaches of Normandy have boosted my personal standing to an all-time high!!

  101. 101
    sweet FA says:

    that 448Mb FFS and I probably could connect to the sun website a bit quicker if I didn’t have to go through all the ooyala stuff.

  102. 102
    Owen Jones says:

    2014 and people are starving to death. the Tories are finishing the job Thatcher started. we need to stand united and hold the Tory bastards accountable. .. And stop sending money to the likes of India….Sorry but charity begins at home..Look after our own first.

  103. 103
    albacore says:

    Never mind all this stuff about schools and infiltration
    Take a look at what’s happening elsewhere in the nation
    According to Vaz, now Leicester’s heritage is disgraced
    Forget the city’s history – it’s been wholly replaced


  104. 104
    Douglas Alexander says:

    Ed getting down with the scum tweeting about football related matters.
    Axelrod is a fucking genius.
    Well worth his 300k contract I say.

  105. 105
    Fishy says:

    Another bandwagon to climb aboard…several months after Government Ministers said exactly the same thing.

  106. 106
    Womble says:

    It’s Wimbledon Common I used to live there.

  107. 107
    Andrew Marred..BBC and bar says:

    Yvette, darling…..We’ll start this interview by giving you the opportunity to take a free hit at your opposite number, Mrs May and the Tories. Please feel free to pile in and say what you want….I won’t interrupt you…OK? Here goes;

    Now then Yvette, tell me what you think of the Tory bloodbath that’s taking place at the moment.

  108. 108
    Benny Fitz-Clements says:

    Whingeing Scousers. You gorra luv ‘em.

  109. 109
    Sad Dick Kunt says:

    Celebrate the rich multi-cultural diversity !

  110. 110
    DK says:

    A ringer for that Ozzy Osbourne Sprog!!

  111. 111
    Mycroft says:

    My near neighbour is a retired Town Planner who worked in Whitehall, he is the person who gathered all the ideas around at the time that allowed Town Councils too:

    1/. Charge motorists for the ‘privilege’ of visiting towns.
    2/. Control funds to such an extent that Vanity Projects became the norm.

    These two measures has killed the Town Centres across the land.

    My own town used to be a vibrant, prosperous Market Town in the South it is now effectively just the arena in which bad behaviour has a forum.

    By paving a huge area and excluding the cars at night the Town Sq. has become a giant boxing/wrestling arena, before when it was full of cars and they moved you could just assemble en-masse and run rampage between pubs.

    During the day only office workers are in the town, it has ceased to be a Commercial hub in the old sense of it.

    Douglas Adams wrote about the Great Shoe-shop Financial Disaster, today yours and mine High Street is suffering a similar fate, but it’s ‘Phone shops and Charity shops that are dominant.

    …Oh, and lots and lots of empty shops.

    We have many discussions, my near neighbour and I, the one thing that keeps coming up was the desire to copy the European Model of the ‘Palazzo’, a sort of Euro-sympathetic idealism.

    It failed.

    No-one in their right mind is going to wander ’round an English Palazzo on wet, windy, miserable and dirty Town Sq. in December.

    No account was ever made of the upkeep needed, so now our once fabulous Town Sq. is dirty, grubby and falling to pieces as the costs to maintain this dumb facade increases every year.

    They wash the floor once every 3 months, Dubrovnik and most in Italy etc are washed every night.


  112. 112

    Yes uber tragic for the young boy who is of course blameless and guilt points to DWP for not getting their rears in gear sooner and paying her
    monies due .
    But I’ d be surprised if she died of actual hunger as there must be food bank and church charity facilities nearby (?)” .

    And , let’ s be honest she still had her mobile which she could have got a few bob for if she was that desperate for food .
    As in all these cases where is /was the father to whom the responsibility of family beadwinner morally attaches — regardless whether they are married or not .
    Far too often the State lets these “seed spillers” get off without sanction and makes no effort to trace !!

  113. 113
    'Call me Dave' Dave says:

    Google’s just not doing it for me – can anyone post me links to our nanny’s nudie pics?

  114. 114
  115. 115

    Vote UKIP :-D

  116. 116
    Socialism is theft says:

    Seems to me to be yet another fault in either the NHS or the Social security system if she had severe mental illness. What was the much-envied (not) NHS and splendid public sector doing?

  117. 117
    Anonymous says:

    The UK had an immigration problem when it allowed his Irish mother and Nigerian father into the county to breed such a shallow chancer.

    His grandfather was Helenus Milmo, one of the “old boys” who let their pal Kim Philby off the hook to continue with his murderous treachery; look him up.

    When the day comes to hang all politicians, we’ll need to find a painless way to irradicate their spawn too. After all, it’s deemed perfectly alright to poison rats.

  118. 118
    W o'Ganterry says:

    Leicester was lost long ago.

  119. 119
    Town Centre Beggar says:

    “high car park charges in town centres compared to retail parks, not to mention the traffic problem getting into the town centre.”

    Those are contradictory problems: encourage parking = more traffic.

    Converting a few town centre shops to flats might help.

  120. 120
    Town Centre Beggar says:

    Axlerod (and Millibrain) would spell “neighbours” without the u.

  121. 121
    Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:


  122. 122
    Newark Newark, so good they lost it twice says:

    Losing raison d’être is the same thing as losing a deposit to a Lib Dem in Newark.

  123. 123
    Bob cuntface Crow says:

    Too late for a refund now,she has to go past a KFC on her way home.

  124. 124
    http://bit.ly/1hHuxPj says:

    When’s your audition for Women in Black ?

  125. 125
    Lardy Lardy says:

    They said the same thing about the Titanic.

  126. 126

    I posted a nice concise one-word comment which demonstrated my amuse’ment at the uncanny accuracy of your analysis. Unfortunately, the Automated Symposiarch which infests these parts of the blogosphere saw fit to consume it without trace. No expression of appreciation, no belch of satisfaction, not even a fat, smelly, sulphuric-laden fart.

    Accordingly, it is with considerable reluctance, not to mention some trepidation, that I have to record my high regard for your ingeniously crafted post with this somewhat more prolix response, something, one mistakenly assumed, that was not encouraged here.

  127. 127
    Bob cuntface Crow says:

    They wont vote,anyone under 25 is a lazy cretin.

  128. 128
    just saying says:

    pain is an important part of what all liblabcon spawn should expect at that time

  129. 129
    Anonymous says:

    Don’t come on here being rational. It upsets the vermin.

  130. 130

    Tashoy Lawrence and another man identified only as ‘Roland’ where shot dead and two others injured, an effeminate man came on the scene.

    He was dressed in a tight pair of knickers and an equally tight sleeveless T-shirt. When he started speaking it was hard to believe that he was male as he displayed all the attributes of a woman, down to the gesticulations.

    A member of the news team noticed him and wondered aloud if he was gay.

    A woman who was in earshot answered his question without flinching.

    “A b…man dat. Nuh look pan him too hard,” the woman said, “a pure bad man him tek.”

    As the man engaged in conversation with some of the women present, no one even flinched or displayed any sign of antagonism toward him.

    One of the women even joked that he was boasting a ‘hickey’ on his neck.

    “But you have hickey, man?” the woman said.

    “How you mean? You no see rain a fall an’ me haffi get me hickey,” the man said.

    The Sunday Observer was on the scene for about an hour and for the entire time the man traipsed freely through the crowd.

    “Nobody nuh business wid him,” the woman said.


  131. 131
    Labour supporters are y says:

    saddo Labour trolls are out today then. Pissed off about falling share of vote mid-term?

  132. 132

    There was a rumour circulating that this picture was, possibly, a fake.

    The truth turned out to be stranger. The kiss between them was quite real and involved tongues.

    The only things that were fake were the individuals themselves. One was not born in the USA and the other was never a Tory.

  133. 133
    Flabbott says:

    Even my Labour colleague Keith Vaz, chairman of the House of Commons Home Affairs Committee, stressed the Government had a “problem” removing foreign national prisoners and called on the Home Office to urgently clarify what constitutes acceptable evidence in cases where sexuality is an issue.


  134. 134
    Fuck Off, Beaker says:

    I’m surprised someone as intellectually confident as Millitwat didn’t realise that the bid process was corrupt when he was part of the government that encouraged it when all the stories of corruption were glying about.

  135. 135
    Dave pretends to be cross with Wanker Gove says:

    and shits all over Theresa

    ha ha ha ha ha

  136. 136
    Well I never says:

    I think that we live in the same town!

  137. 137
    Anonymous says:

    Does that anon @ 115 really mean “irradicate” or eradicate?

  138. 138
    Mark Oaten (LibDem) says:

    Any photos ?

  139. 139
    Alan Rustburger says:

    There is no room in the newspaper industry for a daily publication that dares to tell the truth.

  140. 140
    Anonymous says:

    Chukka doesn’t himself believe what he says;he just wants everyone else to believe it.

  141. 141

    People don’t appreciate how much damage parking charges/restrictions do to town centres.
    I was back in northern France last week & needed to visit the bank in our local town. Apart from no-parking restrictions on obvious traffic choke points parking’s pretty well unrestricted. The only places charged for are in the market square, (where it’s pay & display – free for first hour, 30 cents for the second) & a few street bays by the town hall. Result – a thriving town centre despite a massive Carrefour out by the rocade, similar Intermarché & E-LeClerk in the zone commercial, plus the usual Aldi, Lidl etc etc. It’s just a different way of thinking. Traffic restrictions are to assist traffic circulation. Not revenue sources. Revenue is created from the commercial activity sensible parking policies facilitate.

  142. 142
    The Growler says:

    The LimpyDems weren’t in with a chance anyway, but the Connors have been rattled by UKip even with all the Conners cheer leaders there as well and all the Con rags including Geedes slagging off the UKippers

  143. 143
    Mycroft says:

    Newbury… aka ‘Carter-town’. For it was he that oversaw the transition of this once lovely little town into a shit-hole.

    In the market square at night you could park up and if (like me) you had a decent cat car it was in full view and so unlikely to be vandalised, now you can’t park on any street, you have to pay to park in a car-park where the person next to you might have passengers who will fling their door open and damage your pride and joy.

    I stopped after my Maserati was ‘keyed’ in one of these municipals costing me £2300.

    I parked for years in the town and never had a scratch.

    The town is often a huge fight arena and to stop that there are now lots of Police around, before they were simply not needed… the cost of this folly spreads into all sorts of areas.

    The result is that the town is now the domain almost exclusively of people who only want to get drunk and start fights.

    The peace-loving monied people that kept the place ‘alive’ have f’cked off, the shops have lost millions as a result.

    This month the Town bridge is being re-surfaced with the paving that constantly ripples and falls apart, last year I had to rescue a woman on a Friday afternoon who had tripped on one of the chasms… she sued the Council. She broke her ankle.


    This Council folly is repeated right across the Country.

  144. 144

    Very interesting. Because the thinking of this man sounds so idiotic, I judge that your account must be the truth.

    He, and others of their type, probably made a trip to Italy with their parents and were enchanted by the place. “Let us make it in England!”, would have been the niaive response.

    It fails to take into account:
    * the difference in latitude brings about a difference in temperatures
    * the Italians are still very much of the extended-family mould
    * they have a maturer attitude to alcohol as it is not taxed to buggery
    * the towns are often built on hilltops and the streets are very narrow
    * the street provide welcome refuge from the sun
    * Italy is absolutely stuffed to the brim with Roman remains
    * Venice has more water in the streets than the Somerset levels did

    OK, that last one was a bit tongue-in-cheek but the others are all very good reasons why the idea is not simply transplantable to our towns.

    It shows an unawareness of English history. Every town’s development has been affected by centuries of effects, all caused by the busy coming and going of folks engaged in trade.

    These arrogant and ignorant types have killed trade. The out-of-town centres were already a threat. This act of civic treachery was the killing blow.

    Now let us look at these arrogant and ignorant types. Do we find they are local businessmen? No. One will find that most of them, if not all, have never had a proper job, far less run a business that has to pay its way.

    They are pure theorisers who never, ever once have to pay for the consequences of our actions. They will use the word “society” without even knowing what it means, indeed they have killed any decent concept of it.

    The people who have killed our towns are socialists (spell with or without a capital letter, it matters not.)

  145. 145
    The Revd. Phoney (£rd Fucking Way) B£iar, Sanctimonious Shit and £iar, emoting and wiv stupid grin says:

    I nevva thort it would turn out like that – but I’m not bovvard! I live in a posh area with lottsa other wellfy people.

  146. 146

    …consequences of our their actions…

  147. 147
    Blue Peter Goldfish says:

    Stop blubbering.

  148. 148

    Vote UKIP :-D

  149. 149
    Mycroft says:

    100% correct, he loves Italy and the towns there, he is an Architect.

    He accepts that the outcome has not been what was anticipated.

    The road to hell… is paved with stupid little blocks, badly laid, that floors the towns inhabitants and costs a fortune to maintain.

    You hit the nail perfectly… towns are about TRADING, that is all about enticement to spend both time and money.

    Making them ‘pretty’ is not the answer, but if you don’t understand trade you can easily be fooled into thinking that ‘pretty’ brings both.

    It doesn’t, because it is just make-up, great towns are not pretty, they are charming.

    Even in this age of the I’net, people still like to buy from people, not from outlets.

    By removing small shops and in there place putting up expensive and soul-less ‘shopping malls’ the charm disappears.

    Rates should be almost non-existent for small shops now, such is the mess created in the last 20 years, to get the place revving again.

    Free street parking, low cost small shops and an attitude change to the flow of traffic into the town itself and any town could be ‘saved’ from decline.

    It’s not rocket science or an intellectual challenge, it’s really f’cking simple.

  150. 150
    No. 1. The Larch says:

    He looks upon it as polishing a necessary skill. Lying. Not something that most people can do, their body language always gives the away.
    Liars close their eyes or blink heavily when lying. Balls, for example, has been taught to try to keep his eyes wide open. This makes him look like a drugged-up murderer when he is giving a TV interview. He’s obviously working on this problem as, now, he goes from drugged-up mad rapist to “Stoned on Weed, like laid back, man” in the space of the same interview whilst his brain switches concentration on looking the look to formulating the lie to tell it.
    Mind you, Mrs Balls changes her accent depending on who’s listening.

  151. 151
    pookie snackumberger says:

    Are they alowed to talk like that in Jamaica? Haven’t they heard of the racist industry yet?
    Now there’s an opening in the market for an enterpising young buck of color.

  152. 152

    Owen Jones’s Twitter Feed, inception to present, translated into German:

    ‘Mein Kampf.’

    Vote UKIP :-D

  153. 153
    Prime Minister David Cameron says:

    Has anybody got a left handed tennis racquet?

  154. 154
    Alan Rustler says:

    Tell me, Mister Cameron, why do you so love to sell the voters a bum steer ?

  155. 155
    Gooey Blob says:

    Raisons are as common as Blackberries these days.

  156. 156
    Gooey Blob says:

    Firstly, abolish parking charges; perhaps have an honesty box system for loose change instead, the council may even bring in more cash that way.

    Secondly, get the small shops to open on a Sunday. It makes no sense for traders to be shut for 50% of the weekend when most of their potential customers are free, yet to open during the week when everyone’s at work.

  157. 157
    Heretics awake says:

    You needn’t bother asking for asylum again if you’re going to adopt that attitude.

  158. 158
    HenryV says:

    The big money maker in our town centre is pub and club trade. After a spate of broken windows shops started applying for permission to fit roller shutters. The council refused at first because it was they said detrimental to the appearance of the town. We lost quite a few shops over that before they relented. Rent squeeze on top of insurance costs was too much.

    Yet Labour councillors never appear to struggle for planning permissions for their own homes and ventures. Even when others have been refused similar. Odd that.

  159. 159
    Gooey Blob says:

    It’s going to fall a lot further between now and the election. 29% is about the limit of what Miliband can expect next year and even that could be optimistic. Meanwhile, Chuka and Yvette are on manoeuvres waiting to launch their leadership bids.

  160. 160
    The late Theresa April says:

    It’s the way I crack ‘em !

  161. 161
    Heartless Heartlands says:

    You should see the “affordable” slums they are putting up between Camborne and Redruth. This is a high profile scheme, EU regional funds, Heritage site, been on the telly, designed by the best architects, approved by all the planners and agencies.

    It is a soulless, modern ghetto and will be lucky to last 25 years. It is an absolute disgrace and I doubt anyone involved in its being has to live there.

    Just down the road, one of the prettiest towns in the UK, St Ives, built piece meal long before planners or agencies or EU.

  162. 162
    Lingo says:

    Imagine if UK reporters printed comments as they are spoken on the streets of Londonistan or Glasgow.

    They should though.

  163. 163
    What is the State for? says:

    You know very well that there will be much more to this story and it won’t be black and white as presented in that tale.

  164. 164
    Anonymous says:

  165. 165
    der ehemann einer säule der salzig says:

    Meine ofenfertig Leben !

  166. 166
    David Battenburg says:

    Here we see an event rarely caught on film – the mating of two lizard people.

  167. 167
    Anonymous says:

  168. 168
    Anonymous says:

  169. 169
    Taking the Mickey Handycock says:

    No freaking way.

  170. 170
    Pest control says:

    Ah, are you upset then? Best not play with the big boys, a.

  171. 171
    Calamity Clegg, Chief Cockroach says:

    Did you say pint of Titbread Wankard, Vince ??

  172. 172
    Calamity Clegg, Chief Cockroach says:
  173. 173
    Tim Yeo says:

    Aren’t all your other racquets enough ?

  174. 174
    Bloomers in rain-soaked Bongo Bongo Land says:

    Don’t be daft

  175. 175
    Dey do doh doh dey says:

    And her family.
    BTW, the system was set up by labour and continued by tories.

  176. 176
    Local Northern Yokel says:

    I like Theresa May, she’s my favourite GILF.

  177. 177
    Tim Farton, President of the Cockroach Party says:

  178. 178
    Willy Vague says:

    I assume “Red” is a fully signed up member of PIE like mummy and daddy.

  179. 179
    Long John Silver' s parrot says:

    If Dave Cameron was gunning to get rid of this female Press Aide then that is surely the story and Gove and May not standing the sight of one another is a side issue.

    I am beginning to believe there might just be something in all these rumours that Dave has a problem with women.

    This is going beyond nobbling the ambitions of two Cabinet Ministers: this is about dumping Dave Cameron probably this autumn.

  180. 180
    Mr Angry says:

    If you read the original communications you would be none the wiser about the sender living with the recipient.

    In future any links should be disclosed at the bottom of all communications.

  181. 181
    Rover of Bristol says:

    The Eco Red Pantaloon Mayor of Bristol is intent on turning Bristol into a cycling city, with a ring of Resident’s parking zones and 20 mph speed limits.

    Money is spent on a new Dutch Cycling Lane to allow the Mayor to use his £2K electric bike to get to his place of work, but none of the new parking zones directly affect his operations at The Tobacco Factory for some odd reason.

  182. 182

    Amongst my far-too-many interests is Architecture. For my sins, I own a complete set of Pevsners for the whole of the British Isles which occupy three metres of shelf space just by themselves. Nikolaus Pevsner, although born German, developed an understanding and love for British architecture that was uncannily observant and second to none. He understood how things evolved, they weren’t just accidental.

    To get to this state, one must go back at least to Greek architecture and see how they developed, by trial and error, the best proportions. Sicily is a wonderful place to visit as one may see all types of development including one building which was never completed, thus giving clues to how they manipulated these huge blocks of stone. You can look at temples which “don’t look right” and others that do.

    Britain’s best architects of the past learned these things. The wonderful Brunelleschi from Florence, never actually schooled in architecture, learned from studying Roman architecture with Donatello. The Romans had learned from the Greeks. Brunelleschi was a great inspiration to the likes of Wren some two centuries later.

    Then came brutalist architecture of the mid 20th century. We have all found buildings where it is all but impossible to discover how to gain entrance to them and one has to walk a huge distance around them until one eventually strikes lucky. They are dehumanising, alienating structures. The architects from this school threw all the rule books, developed over millennia, into the fireplace. Many of their buildings are being pulled down now. It is a final act of irony that some have preservation orders placed upon them, not for their beauty nor utility, but because otherwise there will be no examples left! Unbelievable.

    Your acquaintance was probably brought up in that school. He may have never studied classical building form or rationale. I will wager that he will never truly understand why things went wrong, even if he now admits that they did.

  183. 183
    Here is BBC home service says:

    Too late, Camorons Conservatives will lose the May 2015 election, they should have dumped Camoron, two years ago and tried to recover most of their core voters that they lost, they didn’t, they won’t dump Camoron, so after May their will be new faces in Comorons Conservatives ex MPs troughing spots.

  184. 184
    Incapable Vince, deputy Chief Cockroach says:

    I had met Vince Cable, my future boss, perhaps half a dozen times; I doubt he remembered any of them.

  185. 185
    jack Ketch says:

    A slice off the old PIE? Or a BBC fan?

  186. 186
    Anonymous says:

    Irradiate and eradicate

  187. 187

    Vote UKIP :-D

  188. 188
    John Bellingham says:

    @ Monty Python’s second ever sketch.
    Some months ago Chukka was on the Daily Politics. His phone (on silent) went off three times causing loud RF farting through his lapel mic. The second time it happened he was asked to turn his phone off and he claimed, in his injured and affronted manner than he always adopts when questioned, that he “didn’t have a phone”. It is called “the automatic lie reflex”. Although it was obvious to anyone who has owned a mobile over the past 25 years what was happening, he again denied it when it rang for the third time. Andrew Neil suggested that he look in his pocket and, sure enough, there was the obligatory I-phone. Open-mouthed, chukka whined that it was switched off.
    This, folks is the type of person who wants a job more taxing than being a pimp outside of a Brixton whorehouse.

  189. 189
    John Bellingham says:

    Axlerod or Axelrod?

  190. 190
    John Bellingham says:

    Anyone remember the queues at polling stations in 2010 as they closed at 10.00pm and hordes of students who had dragged themselves out of bed at 9.30 were unable to vote?

  191. 191
    ^ says:

    > Tashoy Lawrence

    Is that Lord or Lady?

  192. 192
    Town centre absentee since 2012 says:

    Listeria take always, druggies, beggars, Immy dross looking for adventure/ opportunities, rats in broad daylight largely due to the number of Abdul style filth takeaways, dirt, rubbish, filth, gum, shite in bank doorways, filthy sleeping bags, ….

    Apart from that it can be pleasant to walk through the tumbleweed if you pick your times.

  193. 193
    Murd0ch = Tony's Porridge Stirer says:

    The headline story is shite. What “s3x for sale shock”?
    It would apply much better to a story about Wend Deng.

  194. 194
    John Bellingham says:

    Why are those soldiers protecting their genitals?

  195. 195
    Fack off Yank says:

    Dear Axler Odd, We call them heroes. They fought that you might get a favourable short term profitable appointment.

    The last cretin to call a patriot a bigot, the Great Mongo, never recovered.


  196. 196
    Tachybaptus says:

    Wonder what the excellent Claudia Roden thinks about that bloated monster sliming into her act. Abbott wouldn’t be satisfied with crostini, she’d want a crostone and then some.

  197. 197


    I don’t want to spoil peoples’ pleasant Sunday afternoons so look away if you don’t want to read this:

    Rich’s cartoon will be mercilessly inflicted upon us in little over twelve hour’s time.

    OK, it’s safe to look back again.

  198. 198
    David Icke says:

    If he aint one of the Lizard people, I’m a banana.

  199. 199

    A black day it will indeed be when they start…

  200. 200

    I had said “Zing!”. Will it allow this through, now?

  201. 201
    Excuse me while this redhead sucks me dry says:

    Let me make this plain, you don’t own redheads, at best you only have them on lease or loan. They is no black and white with the gingers, you can have any colour you like as long as its fucking orange, and only orange, it’s their way or the fucking highway. And don’t think you can tame them or go around them, they’lll fuck you over in the meanest possible way they can devise. That is all.

  202. 202

    Ooooh! Subversion!

    It gives me the horn.

  203. 203
    non taxable pikey says:

    There were copy cat riots in Leicester after those in Toxteth, caused by the Bangladeshi and Pakistani oiks. The Sikhs sorted out the problem before the local plod had got itself organised.

  204. 204
    Ziggy says:

    If Theresa May is half the man she purports to be then she should have resigned over this matter and not allowed her “advisor” to take the blame. None of these modern politicians have the balls anymore to stand up for their convictions. However many they may be!!

  205. 205
    BBC Mong says:

    we are switching to “Tories in disarray; all their fault mode/labour need answers” mode to deflect everyone’s attention from the obvious questions:
    1. Who really gives a shit who said what about who, and when?
    2. How much of this is caused by 13 years of Labour’s open doors policy?

  206. 206
    non taxable pikey says:

    The man is definitely a neWark.

  207. 207
    rick says:

    Makes you wonder why Dave and the Tories love the BBC so much. He has often said how much he respects and admires it. Could it be the BBC is in reality part of the two party system ?

  208. 208
    Idon'tneednodoctor says:

    You don’t get to be Abbott’s size by eating fresh air.

  209. 209
    Davey says:

    Today’s spot the difference competition:

    Q’atar World Cup bid process v. Tower Minarets vote count


    Islamimgham school governorship

  210. 210

    Vote UKIP :-D

  211. 211
    Julian, head of Head, see me in my room later says:

    We need to deflect heat from ed, being in power under Mongo in 2010 doesn’t mean they knew anything, 2008 or not, they were busy with facki.., saving the country then.

  212. 212
    Anon says:

    …..The grapes are not very black?

  213. 213

    This Coudenhove-Kalergi stuff is weirder, the more I look at it. It has more twists than the Cresta Run.

    Churchill must have been talking tongue-in-cheek when he included the Russians in his ’46 speech.

    He was not normally so given to wishful thinking (I have typed that and suddenly realised that he saw the UK as another star on the American flag!).

  214. 214
    Duty pedant says:


  215. 215

    Vote UKIP :-D

  216. 216
    Frank Capra says:

    LibDems are certainly almost impossible to digest.

  217. 217
    Margaret Beckett says:

    Anyone want to post naked photos of me online?

  218. 218

    There is a lot of mis/dis-information surrounding it: Am unpicking at the moment. The confusion is sewn by both the left and the C-K mob themselves: C-K are exceptional revisionists: They even tried to redefine the reasoning being the Monroe Doctrine and spin ‘Europe for Europeans!’ to be the European equivalent – in 1923.

    See previous translation.

    Ignoring all of that, the most important point about Coudenhove-Kalergi’s idea for European Union is that it is based on Unity, and is not a Union.

    Mull the political implications of that.

    The document nowhere states that the United States of Europe should be a Federation either.

    Beyond this, this does get very strange: You are into the territory of deep monarchic politics within Europe, and of course, Freemasonry, Rothschild / Warburg funding, and all that stuff which if you speak about in public tends to discredit one.

    Best to stick with whatever can be backed up by historical fact, and be careful with anything sourcing from this organization, and anything that attacks them as being anti-sem!tic – and generally – sourcing.

    Remember: H’itler banned them in 1933, as the NSDAP banned many other ‘secret societies’ which were not aligned with the P2 Lodge.

    These chaps are fairly powerful, and somewhat ruthless.

    A pertinent question: Who is suddenly funding UKIP, and why ? Recall that one objective of Paneuropa wants the UK pushed out of Europe and back into its Commonwealth.

    Vote UKIP :-D

  219. 219
    I'm not gay says:

    Fucking delicious, one pedant out-pedanting the other.

  220. 220
    White rabbit says:

    Ed easily outed as a clueless sports vacuum if asked tomorrow morning ‘who won the French open and the Canadian grand prix’.
    Expect Andy Murray and Rory Mcllroy as plucky hard working Brits. Enquire before breakfast briefing, otherwise wear a waterproof cape.

  221. 221
    Food glorious Food says:

  222. 222
    Food glorious Food says:

  223. 223
    More money than sense says:

    Wait a minute. Good food is cheap you silly woman. If you buy the raw ingredients then you can produce food that is both healthier and cheaper than “industrialised” food.

    Labour always thinks that money is the solution.

  224. 224
  225. 225
    Michael Gove says:

    At a 5-year-old’s Birthday party.

    Whoever decided that a bouncy castle and inflatable boxing gloves were suitable entertainment is mental.

    Literally every child is crying, even the girls who didn’t want to fight.

    On the bright side, it’s been a good workout for me and I’m undefeated in 12.

  226. 226
    that's OK mate, I've got one here says:

    been there, you have my sympathy.

  227. 227
    Bill de Burgh says:

    I wouldn’t let Diane Abbott pass those canapes round. She likes to divide and drool.

  228. 228
    that's OK mate, I've got one here says:

    usually I’ve fried aubergines in oil to make a moussaka then yesterday, after letting the slices sweat for a bit in salt I steamed them and then baked them with onion, tomato, garlic and yoghurt. It was ok but the Tesco brand yoghurt seemed to turn out a bit watery.

  229. 229
    Pillaging Oligarch says:

    Money is the sokution for me

    I have bought respectabiity and residence in Laundry London

    From the Tory Party and their bent lawyers

    Money works miracles in London

  230. 230
    Bill de Burgh says:

    Imagine having a bacon sandwich with Millie Fool, washed down with a pint as pulled by Clegg, against a backdrop of Osborne wallpaper before the bill arrives, as calculated by Gove. Life-rafts for the lot of ‘em come 2015.

  231. 231
    Winston Churchill says:

    If Britain has to choose between Europe and Sea

    It will always choose the Sea

    W o g s begin at Calais

  232. 232
    BBC Thought Police says:


  233. 233
    Mr Hanky says:

    Dirty boy.

  234. 234

    Now! Now!

    You know very well that I sometimes make a deliberate mistake just to prove that I am not perfect.

  235. 235
    BBC Thought Police says:


  236. 236
    BBC Thought Police says:

    Another RACIST!

  237. 237
    Alan Sugartits says:

    Give us fousand pawnds n I’ll fink abou it sweet cheeks.

  238. 238
    Parsehole, Guido's double says:

    The Sun shines out of Michael Gove’s arse

  239. 239
    BBC Thought Police says:


  240. 240
    BBC Thought Police says:


  241. 241
    BBC Thought Police says:


  242. 242
    History Student from AD 3014 says:

    On March 15th., 2015, as the day of reckoning approached, Michael Gove walked into the Cabinet room with a sombre expression, bearing a silver tray with a single tumbler of whisky and a revolver loaded with one bullet. As Gove laid the tray before him, David Conman, staring into middle distance, finally broke his silence with the words, “I understand. The times have turned against us. I see no other way out.”
    And so saying he downed the whisky in one and blasted Clegg between the eyes.

  243. 243
    Bill de Burgh says:

    Would it be too much to ask, that numbered posts were able to appear in vaguely the right order, or is that exactly the kind of racist and unhelpful thinking that places like Tower Hamlets are actively trying to step away from?

  244. 244
    Viperous Old Vince says:

  245. 245
    Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:

    We’re hopeless with numbers. Sorry, but do please vote for us at the next election.

  246. 246
    Anne says:


    Cameron has always had a problem with women

    Just look at the horse he is married to

    And he has the face of a repressed shirt lifter

    He is a weak, sordid, cheap nonentity, badly scripted by ex Blairites like Jeremy Heywood, who is on leave from Morgan Stanley and still doing Blair dirty tricks

    The heart of the British government is totally corrupt

  247. 247
    tredegar boyo says:

    SC isn’t gay even though he still lives with his mum and was married to a very mannish woman for two and a half years, until she divorced him for giving her one up the bum while she was asleep.

  248. 248
    The British media are cunts says:

    So the BBC are still banging on about May and Gove as the top story but Sky are going in a major terror attack in Pakistan.

    I wonder why the BBC would do that?

  249. 249
    jgm2 says:

    Just look at the horse he is married to

    I think she’s gorgeous.

  250. 250
    jgm2 says:

    Yeah. Because prior to June 2010 there were no Russian oligarchs in London and Peter Mandelson most definitely was not holidaying on one of their yachts.

    It’s all Fatcha’s fault.

  251. 251

    Here is the public portal for the European Society of Coudenhove-Kalergi:


    It has details of all winners of the awards, some official ‘history’ and background.

    You will notice that they have officially closed the Coudenhove-Kalergi archives to the public now – access is by written appointment only.

    Also, they are very selective with what they quote from C-K’s work – in particular the manifesto.

    One other problem I have: They always make an attempt to tie C-K with Briand.

    From my research so far on Briand I cannot find any real link between him and C-K other than the coincidence that both had the idea of a United States of Europe.

    Briand was very much interested in a Federation of Union rather than Unity. Briand also did not regard the Federation as a vehicle for isolationism – indeed he wished the Federal Union to be built within the framework of the League of Nations at the time. Briand derived his notion of Federation from Proudhon – a very different source to C-K’s Popovici.

    What is more damning, it is documented that C-K attempted to contact Briand’s close colleague, Alexis Leger, when C-K was in exile in the US.

    That attempted contact was unsuccessful, mainly because Leger had no interest in associating himself or Briand’s ideas with those of C-K. That is documented.

    For Churchill there is also some murkiness. In 1941, C-K sent a memorandum: ‘A’ustria’s Independence in the light of the A’tlantic Charter’ to both Churchill and Roosevelt. Both leaders distanced themselves from this.

    Whilst Churchill used the term ‘Pan-European Union’ in his 1946 speech, I do not think he was intentionally associating with C-K’s idea at all. Schumann and Monnet et al. also I believe were distanced. However, the C-K effect appears to be back.

    This I documented here borrowing heavily from the 2012 State of the Union address of Barosso:

    Worth watching again, through the lens of C-K : Summary of the EU Federalists position and light history of Schumann starts from 8:57, especially Spinelli’s influence: Totally ignored by the C-K Lobby.

    NB: The chap handing out the prizes in some of the photo’s posted is Prince N’ikolaus of L’iechtenstein (ambassador to the Holy See).


    Vote UKIP :-D

  252. 252
    Fat Richard says:

    when mouth breather Gordon Brown is sitting on pan the trying to squeeze out the Lego bricks does he realise that Children in Need have to raise £30,000,000 a year for the next 290 years to recover the £9,000,000,000 money lost on the Balls Brown gold selloff

  253. 253
    The Cuntservative Party says:

    Four years ago, we promised to reduce immigraton to the tens of thousands. So last year we let in 500,000 immigrants.

    We promised to reduce Britain’s debt. So we doubled it.

    Newark, 2010:
    1st Conservative, 27,590 votes, 53.9%
    4th UKIP, 1,954 votes, 3.8 %

    Newark 2014:
    1st Conservative, 17,431 votes, 45.0%
    2nd UKIP, 10,028 votes, 25.9%

    These results show that UKIP’s support has collapsed, and Tory support has increased.

    We are Camoron’s Tories. We’re brilliant with numbers.

  254. 254
    Vote UKIP says:

    Labour under Blair introduced the £0 wage – only they call it internship – and Labour uses those too.

  255. 255
    Pol Potty says:

    Starving to death – that’s one of your commie fantasies is, you stupid boy

  256. 256
    that's OK mate, I've got one here says:

    call me cynical but am I expected to believe that the characters on our Olympic bid and the World cup bid knew nothing about backhanders ?

  257. 257
    Gordno says:

    Andy – good luck in Paris.

  258. 258
    Anonymous says:

    Helensburgh is currently undergoing a version of this. For years the town centre has been blighted by construction, all the pavements have been ripped up and car parking is impossible so businesses are closing all over the place.
    It has a fancy name (The Chord Project) to obfuscate the fact that millions has been spent on resurfacing the pavements and reducing the amount of on street parking. Nobody locally seems to have spotted this, they hate the disruption but haven’t yet realised it is all for nothing.
    What they also don’t know is that this exercise of replacing perfectly good tarmac or concrete pavements with the latest trendy paving inevitably results in damaged services like drains shattered by vibrating compactors and filled with sand so much of it will have to be dug up again very quickly. The surface will also deteriorate surprisingly quickly without regular maintenance which it won’t get.
    This from a council which can’t maintain its roads adequately and perpetually complains about being short of money.

  259. 259
    Seriously though says:

    Somewhat optimistic

  260. 260
    Editor of Titler glossy rag says:

    You must think Camilla is gorgeous as well…

    And you like windmills and wellies?

  261. 261
    The Cuntservative Party says:

    Hmm.. For how many years would Children In Need have to raise £33million to recover the £44,000,000,000 Camoron has pissed-away on foreign aid (to countries with nuclear weapons and space programmes) in the last four years?

    Or the £88,000,000,000 Camoron has given to the unaudited EU?

    Or the £65,000,000,000 annual interest on the debt Camoron’s doubled since becoming PM?

    Let’s not think about it.

  262. 262
    Julian, head of Head, BBC, see me in my room later says:

    How to bury the Brum school affair. Such a to do over a little thing. Who do these English think they are?

    We shall continue to lead with the clash now further fuelled by yvette’s call for further apologies. That should get us to Friday.

  263. 263
    Seriously though says:

    Working on Governmet Service does truly begin at Calais

  264. 264
    Anonymous says:

    @ John Bellingham
    I have met a few people with the “automatic lie reflex” which is important to recognise when dealing with them. It appears to be an unconscious reflex; they lie even when there is no reason whatsoever to do so and make their lives excessively complicated as a result. It’s very odd, but surprisingly common.

  265. 265
    EU Regulations says:

    Van Rumboy looks like he’s got a banana stuck up his arse…and not a straight one at that!

  266. 266
    Mad and bad Goordon Brown says:

    Sarah and will found another charity called

    We sell gold and save children fund

    All the barrow boys of London and their wags will be at our inauguration

    Along with Guido and his PR team who we are hiring for the event

  267. 267
    Fat Richard says:

    Was is labour who left a meesgae sorry no muney

  268. 268
    Anonymous says:

    Exactly. Just admit that the world has changed and the town centre shop is a concept that has had its day. Of course this is anathema to the ecoloon watermelons because it accepts car use as the norm rather than their beloved collectivist public transport.

  269. 269
    Anonymous says:

    If this is real it needs a wider audience. The public need to know what species of scum this man is. If Labour don’t disown him they are tainted.

  270. 270
    Anonymous says:

    Mr Milliband. You are the leader of HM Opposition. WTF are you doing wasting your time over fucking football?

    Yes, I know the PM does similar stuff, which is equally reprehensible.

  271. 271
    Liam Byrne ( aka Baldemort ) says:

    It was all Thatcher’s fault.

  272. 272
    untanfgle tangle says:

    move the cabinet to the right, in order to reveal the energy supply source.

  273. 273
    Vincent van Gogh says:


  274. 274
    Anonymous says:

    A Socialist MP railing against cheap food. You couldn’t make it up. “Let them eat cake”, indeed.

  275. 275
    Anonymous says:

    She’s an ecoloon.

  276. 276
    01 oI oven owen polo says:

    POLO. clothing. game. kinlon. kingleon. squeaky david asks: who is who.
    who is posh and who is klingon? alien. little people. all those virtual billions.
    germs will be germans. ham will be ham.

  277. 277
    Nick Clegg says:

    I want to talk to you, I want to shampoo you, I want to renew you again and again, applause applause, life is..

  278. 278

    Very piecemeal but I was aghast at the false binary nature of the supposed culmination of the European question:

    War – or peace!
    Anarchy – or organization!
    Arms race – or teardown!
    Competition – or cooperation!
    Collapse – or merger!

    It does not take much consideration to observe that the choices do not split like this. Enough years have passed that this should be obvious to anyone. Hell! Competition is mentioned here as an evil when it is actually a supposed cornerstone of EEC, if not EU life! It makes the option of merger sound even more ominous.

    It appears simplistic in exactly the same way that he poured scorn upon others for. Totalitarian.

  279. 279
    Anonymous says:

    Sounds like the Sunday Supplement lefty meeja woman who devoted her column one day to a rant about why Tesco shouldn’t be allowed to open in Musselburgh because it would threaten her “local corner shop”. Which turned out to be a trendy delicatessen with prices to match.

  280. 280

    Forgot to say:

    “You’re either with us, or against us”

    False dilemma!

  281. 281
    may must start in april says:

    regression is. keen computers are resident of beech ie head.

  282. 282
    in the H iya street says:

    lacy ugg says. when i am wrapped up , my eggs stick out. when the tick is out then my toe s toe up.

    studio is nike. sketchers is confused. this size, that size. virtual peugeot has a suggestion.

  283. 283

    Pre-NSDAP propaganda.

    But now at least you know where O’rwell and others got their inspiration.

    Remember, this was written in 1923, a long time before the ECSC, let alone the EEC / EU.

    Vote UKIP :-D

    Vote UKIP :-D

  284. 284
    Lord Oakshit says:

    Get stuffed.

  285. 285
    holding company says:

    have you watched episodes yet?
    yet is silenc.
    episode 1 is shouty.

    where is Jmes when he is not in Dean’s pocket.

  286. 286
    táxpáyér says:

    (Some types of) Property taxes ARE capitalist.

    Ground-rents are a still more proper subject of taxation than the rent of houses. A tax upon ground-rents would not raise the rents of houses. It would fall altogether upon the owner of the ground-rent, who acts always as a monopolist, and exacts the greatest rent which can be got for the use of his ground. More or less can be got for it according as the competitors happen to be richer or poorer, or can afford to gratify their fancy for a particular spot of ground at a greater or smaller expense. In every country the greatest number of rich competitors is in the capital, and it is there accordingly that the highest ground-rents are always to be found. As the wealth of those competitors would in no respect be increased by a tax upon ground-rents, they would not probably be disposed to pay more for the use of the ground. Whether the tax was to be advanced by the inhabitant, or by the owner of the ground, would be of little importance. The more the inhabitant was obliged to pay for the tax, the less he would incline to pay for the ground; so that the final payment of the tax would fall altogether upon the owner of the ground-rent.

    — Adam Smith , The Wealth of Nations, Book V, Chapter 2, Article I: Taxes upon the Rent of Houses

  287. 287
    charles says:

    have you read King James Bible?
    it is under the stairs, just in case you cum.

  288. 288
    T.B£iar - the People's Messiah says:


  289. 289
    táxpáyér says:

    Rent + business rates = a constant
    If you want to revive town centres then cutting VAT and income taxes will do a better job.

  290. 290
    is christine Lagarde almost human ? kinky says:

    I change my hair everyday. My studio is on the 5th bypass near the Unicorn charity business, called Beechams. U.S have yet to decide. is it in charity business or a comic hero.

  291. 291
    'Gypsy' Dave Cooper says:

    Twenty years ago we were fine, solid country, English and at peace with ourselves. Now what, PC shite everywhere you look, Islam taking over our schools whilst the government sits idly by, huge public sector waste with no sign of stopping and a media against any kind of change.

    If I had the money and resources I would fuck off and take my family with me.

    42, married, four boys under 13 and completley unrepresented. But then my old man and his dad didn’t pay into the pot and fought for this country so we are owed fuck all.

  292. 292
    táxpáyér says:

    Tesco must be forcing people to go in there and taking their money off them with menaces.

  293. 293
    táxpáyér says:

    lookup carluccio melanzane parmigiana

  294. 294
    I'll tell you now and I will tell you again. says:

    We have a feeder road only a mile long, with a golf course on one side and the cemetery on the other, it ended up at a roundabout with three other roads, it got busy in the morning rush-hour but worked quite well as after rush-hour it was just a normal road, they decided it was needed to sort the road out to speed up traffic, they took away the roundabout and turned it into a four way junction with traffic lights and traffic lights at the golf course entrance and the cemetery one, rush-hour is now an all day one and the morning rush-hour has turned into a major hold-up, they have now added a set of traffic lights for a new junction into a new surgery at the other end, the road is now a waste of time, chaos reigns.

  295. 295
    Diane Abbott, Ed Mliband and Chuka Umunna Lookalikes. says:

    Diane and Chuka dump Ed Miliband for David

  296. 296
    Michael Gove says:

    Ray Davies and Dave Davies are discussing a Kinks reunion… http://fb.me/6C6xdLNXp

  297. 297
    táxpáyér says:

    Diane’s not a Brioche dodger.

  298. 298
    what the fuck says:

    i am classically trained.
    does ghandu does what handsum.

    who is arthur?
    he soames.

  299. 299
    i fucked posh says:

    do you fuck posh cp snow’s coins?

  300. 300
    shift says:

    money has a short shelf life.

  301. 301
    BBC Head of head says:

    It is essential that our mission to assist the turning of England into a moozie shithole is best served by ensuring that any conflict situation anywhere in the world is at any time of the day and night reported as though it was here.

    We do not know why we feel this way, it seems fashionable like our preferred sexual routes.

    Already we are spinning the line that the poor Birmingham people who just want to be left alone with their own lives and ghett.. Communities are in fact the victims of the Iphobia syndrome and victimhood.

  302. 302
    An Irishman and a Scotchman says:

  303. 303
    táxpáyér says:

    Everyone civilised likes Sikhs

  304. 304
    aga khan says:

    finest cooker is out now.

  305. 305
    táxpáyér says:

    Has anyone actually ever been helped by a social worker?

  306. 306
    y weep. kohli says:

    your health is in your hands. believe the cover. believe the story. lingo is know to jhonny foreigner.

    Ga ZING <~|

  307. 307
    Here is BBC home service says:

    One has been and the other a waste of space, Sky News do not do news..

  308. 308
    'Gypsy' Dave Cooper says:

  309. 309

    Check this blog post on Monnet:


    Read with the translation of Pan-European Manifesto in mind – particularly the views expressed about the US.

    As Rolf Harris would say: Can you see what it is yet ?

    Vote UKIP :-D

  310. 310
    vicious villain says:

    why bollywoo. when you can.
    lheroin’s hero.

    y does more than one work for Miss World._|\[]
    buy teasers from malteasers. even if you are tid less but more.

  311. 311
    Nigel Farage says:

    Got your measure you posturing fraud.

  312. 312
    mecca asks. says says:

    does meddina wear wings?
    mehndi wears trousers.

  313. 313
    Michael Gove says:

    Are All Penis Extenders The Same? http://bit.ly/1fOGK31

  314. 314
    Guy News Room says:

    Is this a Caption Competition ?

  315. 315
    Diane Fatbott says:


  316. 316
    tax free? says:

    holy day or holi day.
    slow slaw fast.

    does david beckham pay tax? aak his bud. one man 2 gov.

    everyone is a bastard.

  317. 317
    ask pyrex. says says:

    use the best china.

  318. 318
    whale. says says:

    fish is junk.

  319. 319
    UN Observer says:

    The Middle East is in flames thanks to the war criminals Bush and Blair and the neocons

    They should both be hung for crimes against humanity

  320. 320
    The Miliband war criminal says:

    The other millionaire hypocrite Milliband

    But having been Foreign Secretary approving torture and rendition

    He then ratted on Britain for jet set neocon life in New York

    Sick bucket

  321. 321
    LAbour Trolls are so easy to spot says:

    Reply to number 252

    Apart from you deliberate lie about immigration.

    You haven’t shown the results for your mates in the Labour Party sunshine.
    They went backwards 5% whilst IN OPPOSITION for fvck’s sake!

    The Conservatives, for a mid-term governing party, especially with their record in by-elections whilst in government, was fantastic. A 20 point lead over the next candidate with turnout reduced by 20% on the last GE.

    They were cock-a-hoop.

  322. 322
    N Tom o'Logist says:

    Are those giant clothes moths eating his tie ?

  323. 323
    Anonymous says:

    Quite. I’m no fan of Tesco having been ripped off by one of their “special offers” but whenever a new supermarket is proposed the local green ink brigade start whining that “nobody wants them here” and “they will kill off the local shops” and wonder why nobody sane takes them seriously…

  324. 324
    Bill Gate. says says:

    am I steve jobs?
    i cannot tell my front from my back.

    when the Ipad gets electrocuted, which end of the mousetail will get blamed.
    blame the mouse trap. and then god created man.

    man? which hue? mating between white and red has not worked out. just ask bluetooth.

  325. 325
    Warren. says says:

    don’t aks aks.
    it’s all a game of bridge to me. in any case Buffett summons.

  326. 326
    A Nonny says:

    Yes, Unless the rates >= to that constant, in which case the business premises will be useless.

  327. 327
    lady bitch says:

    why do my farts echo?
    now ekkothat.

  328. 328
    Nina's Beard says:

    I found this is a quite incisive account of the difficulties of liberal democracies in countering the Sharia threat, rendered in song.

  329. 329
    Hey Nonny NO!!! says:

    Yes, the region was an oasis of peace under the kind tutelage of Saddam Hussein, Yasser Arafat and Ayatollah Khomenei before Bush and Blair came on the scene.

  330. 330
    táxpáyér says:

    will you fuck off you recycled sock of wasted jism.

  331. 331
    David Battenburg says:

    She probably prefers her apes fresh, not canned.

  332. 332

    De Gaulle… was convinced that in foreign affairs, logic and sentiment did not weigh heavily in comparison with the realities of power.


    Monnet held that …the existence of nation states is superfluous and even dangerous for peace. Hence they need to be abolished…

    …he objected to …the elected representative… [representing] …the people.

    These words, and the thoughts they entertain, could as well have been written by Hitler, Napoleon or Stalin.

    Everyone of us, in our own lives, develops strategies to turn longer tasks into shorter ones. World leaders are no different. How tempting it must be, when the demands of State are pressing in conflicting ways from different and competing directions, to take a short cut and actually get on with the greater objective one has set oneself.

    In this paragraph above, maybe, is encapsulated the simplest and seeming innocent way of proving the following statement:

    All power corrupts

    The fact that this seemingly efficacious move has enabled a deadline to be met, or another objective to be brought to fruition, becomes an affirmation of one’s decision. It allows a process of denial to commence and the stark warning above, with which one is almost certainly familiar, does not even enter the consciousness.

    This is presented at the lowest level here, there can be an infinite array of intermediate points between this and acting in the certain knowledge of what you are doing being abhorrent.

    Of practical necessity in the modern world, no leader can live an ordinary life and so can never see what the effects of their policies are. That is not meant to be or sound exculpatory.

    Pictures of them eating bacon sandwiches are supposed to assure us that is not the case.

  333. 333
    Grossen Yahoo says:

    There are limits, you know, more so if one’s under the kosh.

  334. 334
    Gordon Brown says:

    Have you seen that Omaha fellow ? I’m sure I saw him dodge in here.

  335. 335
    albacore says:

    Phew! What a relief! Dave’s pledged a robust response
    He won’t sit on his arse, procrastinate and ponce
    The man is cast iron, as we’ve all seen by now
    He’ll sack the inspectors. That won’t arf solve this row


  336. 336
    Anonymous says:

    When will Government ditch appeasers like Charles Farr?

  337. 337
    MII5 says:

    George Osborne and Andrew Feldman were trying to get a bung on the same oligarcg’s yacht…

    Labour and Conservative Parties corrupt to the core…

  338. 338
    Color me byutifull says:

    David should get himself a good sombrero. Those other two look very suntanned.

  339. 339
    Tommy Thingy says:

    …. and we lost our deposit. Just like that!

  340. 340
    Tommy Thingy says:

    Amen Holmes?

  341. 341

    Think tankers are all slime bags

  342. 342
    Oh what a lovely Civil War says:

    It is when both are following the anti-colonial, pro-immigration, pro-Europe, redistributive post-war left-wing road map. Anything remotely contrary is “haram” and treated as if it were evil.
    Come the Revolution, it will be a toss-up to decide whether it’s Muslim School Governors or BBC Governors and Directors that go to the noose first.

  343. 343
    Oh what a lovely Civil War says:

    ‘ere, oho you calling rational?

  344. 344
    Yes. Oh yes. Oh yes. says:

    Look out! Mongo’s behind you. He’s risen from the dead and is presently terrorising the Scots. I said we should have used more concrete.
    That said, if I were Salmond, I would pay for Brown’s travelling expenses personally, Mongo has got to be the most powerful inducement to vote yes. Even more than Cameron. Sod the financial meltdown; the aged uncared-for, the students begging the streets, anything that Mongo the Mad recommends comes with a “triple Scythe” instant death warning.

  345. 345
    Yes. Oh yes. Oh yes. says:

    It seems that you have a case of postus interruptus.

  346. 346
    Fred Dibnah interrupts a long sleep to says:

    “Axel-rod”, Arch. term of eng. orig. pre-Industrial device, part of rudimentary mechanics keeping wheels in fixed position, as in cart.Superceded by geared unit and shafts, or steering and suspension.

  347. 347
    It's all in the jeans says:

    It’s odd how like and like attract. Quite unnatural really. Oh, it’s Westminster. You should have said. Everything’s back to front, if you get my drift……

  348. 348
    Bill de Burgh says:

    David Steel apparently keen on a Kinks reunion.
    Cyril Smith, however, is definitely unavailable.

  349. 349

    Hey there! I know this is somewhat off topic but
    I was wondering if you knew where I could find a captcha plugin for my comment form?
    I’m using the same blog platform as yours and
    I’m having difficulty finding one? Thanks a lot!

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