June 5th, 2014

More Want to Leave the EU Than Stay In

President Obama is in Brussels with Dave to tell us how he thinks the British people should be voting. He says Scots should vote no to freedom and that Britain should stay in the EU, haughtily remarking: “I’m sure the people of Britain will make the right decision”. Unfortunately for the President an ITV/ComRes poll out today shows more Britons want to leave the EU than stay in. 42% would vote to leave if there was a referendum tomorrow and just 40% would vote to stay. Sadly Obama didn’t give us his verdict on whether the people of Newark should go for Robert Jenrick or Roger Helmer today…


332 Comments

  1. 1
    Nigel Farage says:

    I’m not laughing my tits off here, honestly, I’m not.

    Liked by 1 person

    • 9
      Ande Soteri says:

      Your in Malta doing mine

      Like

      • 11
        Roger Helmer says:

        :)

        Like

      • 21
        grammar twat says:

        It’s you’re Ande. You’re. As in you are. Not your. You’re. You’re. You’re.

        Like

      • 48
        Mycroft says:

        He’s in Newark atm.

        Like

      • 164
        gi s out. p is pout. says:

        it isall about expertise.

        are computers general purpose.
        has doctor david owen embedded himself into his iphone yet.
        he no samsung.

        Like

      • 207
        kuwait ie in knightsbridge says:

        NO or no no or . oxbridge saudi loves shopping in new bridge . somali mali is saftey .

        who will be “.”
        conscious/first. coupling

        oxen says push.
        electric car or cart?
        being mental.
        being human. rubberised mouth is a spitting image. motherhood has to be transistorised. do royalty have an interest in edwardian dolls?

        Like

      • 248
        saatchi 2 is missing. other woman alert says:

        charles saatchi at the mansion house.

        Like

        • 256
          lansborough hotel attendant says:

          oir refurbishments are scheduled to complte in december.
          missing “e”

          i or u. now the horses are no more. go cart go. the hrose do have the right of way.

          HMV says hm v.
          parked forehead says: “wish i was a pillow”

          Like

    • 25
      Anonymous says:

      How come O’Bumma has not been arrested for murder by drone?

      Like

      • 73
        These are not the Dorids you've been looking for says:

        you mean ‘unmanned combat air vehicle’ (UCAV)

        Like

      • 113
        Axe, you magnificent cunt says:

        I can’t answer your question but I’d be pleased to come over and discuss it with you, and if you’ll just give me your GPS coordinates, er, that is if you can fix your location… er, um, if you could tell me the address where you’re located … er, that is…

        Like

      • 176
        l close your says:

        in covert operations gargen a gas meter broke.
        a fla,e trickled apart.

        no tirckster. just a bus ch. in my sheep.
        hence strippers always strip. #askGraham.
        pore or pour. the fat lady .as we are now in sing.a.snake. it is all down to god fyr him. soon? where is mitsubhishi trojan mr president?

        Like

      • 211
        buses come in three's says:

        amazon baby on board bade.g

        baby is the back. ask the somalian trucker.
        she is john lloyd’s when she is not reutering around with intent. vicious cat.

        Like

    • 67
      Ed Twelvety Balls says:

      Newark will vote Tory. Some polling indicates Labour are in with a chance of coming second, but there’s a greater chance of Ukip doing that.

      Like

      • 85
        Elvis says:

        Labour came second last time – it’s the Tories turn!
        I don’t care who comes first as long as I beat the LibDoomed.
        I’ve £100 on at 25/1.

        Like

      • 224
        marlon brando says:

        blind man.

        the a guido.
        the rough is the guide. pls sir, i have been bastardised.

        the black man from guyana was interesting. enjoy the portugee e waterfront backwater cup world.

        time to drink the tablets raw.

        Like

    • 71
      Diddley says:

      Typical ‘democrat’ – if you don’t vote for what I want you to vote for, you are wrong.

      So sick of this attitude, so many politicians need a seriously hard kick in the balls/fanny/transgender garden.

      Like

    • 102
      UP AGAINST THE WALL ETC! says:

      What a bloody good idea, let’s get out of the EU and allow the land owning rentier class which runs this country to really screw the peasants, ahem, I mean citizens of this country into the ground, so they don’t have a pot to piss in and work for nothing. And think themselves lucky to do so.

      What an excellent prospect. For economic fascists.

      Turkeys voting for Christmas methinks. And I am no great fan of the EU either, but then neither am I fan of the crypto captilist economic terrorists running the deep state of this country.

      Like

      • 109
        BBC executive says:

        “methinks”? You not that self important twat, Russell Brand, are you?

        Like

      • 188
        is air water? says:

        wall street.
        street road.
        hyacinth.

        picaddilly is dirty.
        arch your back at marble arch. c1 is a bus 2?

        Like

    • 104
      coeur_de_lion says:

      Perhaps Mr Obama would have advocated staying under British colonial rule in 1775?

      No?

      Would he have advised the Mau Mau to give it a rest and behave in the 60s?

      No?

      Surely we can’t be dealing with another left wing hypocrite?

      Like

      • 119
        Close Down the BBC Now says:

        Did you see him with his arm around the waist of the mother of that (alleged) deserter who’s (allegedly) responsible for the deaths of six of his comrades, and for whom he’s released five Taliban employees, hell bent on revenge? Nice. Not exactly reported like that by the BBC, of course.

        Like

    • 155
      parallel living in kensington and chelsea says:

      11
      q 1
      ear and mouth.

      Like

      • 157
        y hide. park and ride. says:

        barclays.
        sink the bank. buy the bicycle.

        le koc le koc koc le koc.
        my elasticated legs go up to my navel but i am properly trousered up as well.

        Like

    • 196
      right foot itch says:

      kick the cat.

      left foot is trouble. all the pigs monkeys and bitches have disco saturday night . grease is on.

      the black sadie is athe ready. polish asha is gagging for it, as for the the nepalise ganga, she WILLL settle for Mr Jam, na? the nervouse electronic person outside has his shades on while he fags aways in that “o you r so full” detroit dirty car museum.

      Like

    • 210
      Corby says:

      O’Buma should be told to take a running jump.

      Like

    • 229
  2. 2
    still walking into darkness says:

    What’s the percentage that want to stay in if you remove the EU migrants in the UK from this poll?

    Liked by 1 person

  3. 3
    Anonymous says:

    That’s a barchart worth of the Lib Dems…..

    Like

    • 6
      Antipo-dean says:

      Beat me to this.

      Like

    • 10

      Blue for outs, Yellow for ins. Very subliminal

      Like

    • 17
      Roland Deschain says:

      I’d give you a ‘like’ for that, but buggered if I’m going to create a WordPress account just to do so.

      Like

    • 46
      Pie Thagorus says:

      It’s a rather deceitful bar chart.
      It gives the ‘outers’ an appearance of three times the ‘inners’!
      Why not start from zero?

      Like

      • 68
        Anonymous says:

        The Lib Dem chart maker has a job on guido, as there is little to do at LD HQ these days

        Like

      • 75
        Nick Clegg says:

        Because it has been done in homage to the style we use for Lib Dem charts
        – and it’s not misleading at all, honest.

        Like

        • 131
          The voting public says:

          When are you due for repatriation, Clegg ?

          You’d better not be expecting us to foot the bill.

          Like

      • 76
        Global Warming Data Fiddler says:

        Nothing wrong with that graph; have a look at ours. That is why you pay nearly £7 a gallon for fuel and all those green taxes. MPs are thick fuckers easily fooled by a dodgy graph.

        Like

    • 60
      Mr Codsall the Maths Teacher says:

      Guido never would pay attention

      Like

    • 77
      Anonymous is a semi-literate moron says:

      It’s “worthy,” not “worth,” you idiot.

      Like

      • 218
        Grandma Nazi-can I take his spanking for him instead? says:

        “Waxaan haystaa karaa inuu baasaboor halkii?”

        Like

  4. 4
    Fritter Farage, The Junket King says:

    After the count in Newark Helmer will be sent into Maltese exile by Farage.

    Like

  5. 6
    Vote Tory for unlimited immigration says:

    If the USA thinks being in the EU is so great, why doesn’t it offer to take our place?

    Will it at least pay our £22billion annual membership fee?

    Liked by 1 person

    • 28
      Bert says:

      Barry can get to fuck. He’s causing enough problems in his (adopted) country, thanks very much.

      Like

      • 122
        Close Down the BBC Now says:

        He’s the worst president in living memory. You can tell that even from this far away.

        Like

        • 138
          Ukweli Machungu says:

          Barry’s a placeman if ever there was one. It stands out a mile.

          Like

        • 189
          táxpáyér says:

          Carter must be SO revealed.

          Emperor Zero’s place on the trillion dollar note is assured.

          Like

      • 142

        Presumably, all those not born in the USA may henceforth be eligible to become president?

        Like

        • 173
          Sly of the family Stallone says:

          All it’ll take is a constitutional amendment and the next thing you know it’ll be President Schwarzenegger that you’re dealing with.

          Like

        • 221
          Bert says:

          The perfect job for Gordon Brown … though Iain Martin at the Telegripe wants him as president of the European Commission … hmm, why can’t he do both jobs?

          Like

  6. 8
    Anonymous says:

    Oh look, a 2 percentage-point difference made to look MUCH greater by setting the start of the Y-axis to non-zero.

    Such a dishonest approach to the use of graphs.

    Like

  7. 13
    Anonymous says:

    What an impertinent Gibson’s dog the man is. What a pity he only got elected because of his colour.

    Like

  8. 18
    Homeless Robot says:

    Obama doesn’t need the ITV/ComRes poll, he conducts the NSA/GCHQ poll with a lot more accuracy and nude pictures for when he gets bored.

    Like

  9. 19
    Fred says:

    At least in the USA they vote for their President, and they don’t have to have a second ballot if they get it wrong.

    Like

    • 32
      táxpáyér says:

      I don’t know. It’s said that even the dead are allowed to vote in detroit and chicago.

      Like

      • 41
        Socialism is theft says:

        Whereas EU countries are run by people controlling the walking-dead (zombies), like the ones in Westminster.

        Like

    • 47
      illogical says:

      How are your hanging chads doing today Fred?

      Like

    • 205
      EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

      What is it about this Ben Gazi – bloke/thingy/hilarythecommie/massivecoverup?

      Like

  10. 22
    F##k the LibLabCon says:

    Any news from Newark? Any stories of ukippers wondering around the place raping children and eating babies yet?

    Like

    • 54
      Purple Pie Eater says:

      No. They are queuing round the block outside the bookies, to collect their wins on the Elvis Part beating the LibDoomed.

      Like

  11. 23
    Justin Beiber hate my Marmalade says:

    we’re in eu-slave-ia until it turns into 90s Yugoslavia

    Like

  12. 26
    Bishop, David Laurence - Bus-Pass Elvis Party says:

    Clegg is telling deliberate, cynical lies about wrecking recall. Will the MSM pick him up on it, or are his lies no longer newsworthy?

    Like

    • 82
      Media Mong says:

      Not worth reporting; a LibDems lies like a cheap Japanese watch.

      Like

      • 146
        Jack Ketch. says:

        Even the cheapest Japanese watches tell the right time.
        The expression you are seeking is “As queer as a Chinese watch”.

        Like

      • 216
        EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

        The liblabcons couldn’t be in better company with the whores from fleet street – And scum from the Inns of the temple – All the liars, frauds, chancers, cheats, B/Shitters and general low-life of the Westminster circus. Fuck ‘em all. As for the pigstabulary and the MET [Inc The private city of london pigs] – they’re all part of the four pillars of the rotting, stinking filthy pe3do practicing state.

        Like

  13. 29
    Graham says:

    We don’t need any advice from a Muslim President of America.

    Like

  14. 33
    What Freedom? says:

    The Scots being tied to EU is NOT freedom!

    More people want Out of Europe than In? Duh!

    It is a close call. This suggest to me that Cameron will carry on with his muscular reformation of the EU prior to the referendum.

    Like

  15. 34
    Nick Robinson says:

    078TOENAILS

    Like

  16. 35
    Fruitcake, swivel eyed loony, closet racist, crank and gadfly says:

    42% v 40% seems close but I’d take that with Nigel leading the ‘out’ campaign and any LibLabCon drone leading the ‘in’.

    What time do we find out that the arseholes of Newark votes for an arsehole with a blue rosette?

    Like

    • 51
      Socialism is theft says:

      They look like they are voting for a zombie with a blue rosette. Sheep led by zombies, bloody marvellous.

      Like

    • 53
      Persona non grata says:

      Polls close 10pm.

      Like

    • 63
      Fred of Fleet Street. says:

      The papers have the headlines all ready and waiting.
      ‘Conservatives Storm to Victory’,
      ‘A crushing defeat for Farage’,
      ‘A positive signal for Cameron’ etc etc.
      Pity it’s all a load of ball locks.

      Like

    • 144
      Social Services-Don't kick him out, he's only got another 3 houses! Just where is he going to live? says:

      Read it and weep.

      Like

    • 302
      Anonymous says:

      Nigel will not be leading the out campaign. As a party leader he can support it but not lead it.

      Like

    • 318
      Hmmm says:

      That 2% must be within the margin of error of the poll even as it is.

      If there ever is a referendum the BBC will go into full-on pro-EU propaganda mode (and then apologise and say ‘lessons were learned’ afterwards), targeted squarely at the ill-informed/don’t-knows.

      Add that to the inevitable voting fraud, which will be overwhelmingly pro-EU (fraud always benefits the bad guys).

      And if the ‘out’ campaign manages to win in spite of all that, they will keep holding referenda until the proles give the ‘right’ answer, like they did in Ireland, in which mysterious figures were seen running off with full ballot boxes.

      Faith in a referendum as a means of curtailing the EU is misplaced.

      Like

  17. 37
  18. 38
  19. 39
    Nick Robinson says:

    Fat bottom girls can call me 24/7.
    07889 189178
    (me love you long time)

    Like

    • 55
      Dianne Abbott (nee Dada) says:

      Will do, Nick.

      Like

      • 154
        I'm concerned about Invasion's of Privacy says:

        Does he have problems with his Microsoft Operating System? Is he aware of the ‘New Government Scheme’ about new Boilers? Does he want to start dating poor old people from Nigeria? I think he’s not aware of these appalling travesties of Justice! I need to speak to him about this!…Again, and again, and again, and again, and again….Blah, blah….

        Like

    • 161
      Voter says:

      I never understand why cellphone numbers are spaced in that odd way.
      07889 189178

      It should of course be read like any other sensible area number:
      0788 918 9178

      Like

  20. 41
    Rob Roy says:

    So the man in the Whitehouse (if one is allowed in these so politically correct days to call it that) has no instructions for the voters of Newark although he has plenty to say to the people of Scotland.

    Interesting to know what he really thinks of those RBS Bank Managers too.

    If Wingnut wants Scotland to stay in the Union more reason I say to vote yes for independence.

    Like

    • 49
      William Wallace says:

      I cannot find any link between these D Day celebrations and Scottish Independence.

      Vote Yes for independence for a brighter future both sides of the Border.

      Like

    • 57
      Scottish Voter says:

      Obama will have no influence on how I vote in the referendum.

      YES we can.

      Like

  21. 43
    Jacky Treehorn says:

    Of course he wantsus to stay it’s no secret he dislikes Britain and its history and would like the UK to slowly dissapear into a socialist shit hole

    Like

  22. 45
    Anonymous says:

    #VoterIntimidation

    Like

    • 52
      Socialism is theft says:

      I’d sooner vote for Qatar.

      Like

      • 140
        Tom Catesby says:

        I’d sooner vote for catarrh.

        Like

      • 222
        EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

        I’d sooner vote for Blairs Hanging – to teach ‘em all a fucking good lesson that it’s the people who are the masters and the politicals who are ‘our slaves’.

        Like

    • 58
      Anonymous says:

      campaigning within a prescribed area

      Like

      • 64
        Mycroft says:

        I am toying with tweeting mini-me asking “Where will you be standing next? Innocent Face.”

        Would that be cruel?

        … or just the first to ask?
        :)

        Like

    • 72
      Col Ripper of Braintree says:

      Obviously a simpleton, one leg shorter than the other (the left one) this senile old fool
      probably doesnt know who he representing him but promised to wear that blue rosette in return for a nice cup of tea and a biscuit and the chance to meet Lady Thatcher, let us hope that he gets to fulfill that ambition sooner rather than later

      Like

    • 178
      I'm playing stoopid, but as there are no copper's about I may get away with it says:

      The Law States…”No fucking morons in front of Voting Booths”. He’s no different to the Tower Hamlet’s fucktards. Just where are the Coppers nowadays? I’m thinking the Peel Street Boys have taken the shilling of Government Centralism and not not veered on the side of Free Choice and Expression.

      Like

    • 194
      táxpáyér says:

      Very open about his theft plans…

      Like

    • 201
      Bosun Higgs says:

      Is it Jim Trott from Dibley?

      Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes no

      Like

  23. 62
    Gary Elsby Stoke says:

    Ian Duncan Smith says:

    “Britain will reject UKIP”

    Game set and match once the Conservative swivel eyed loons are put to bec and Labour comes out fighting (add in Greens…etc according to taste).

    Like

    • 66
      Mycroft says:

      That makes me feel even more comfortable with my choice of UKIP.

      That man couldn’t do anything right even if his life depended on it.

      A Political Prannet.

      Like

      • 83
        Col Ripper of Braintree says:

        Not only that Mycroft the mans a fucking jap!
        Give him half a chance and we would all be bui;ding railway bridges on a diet of dry rice and weevils, jut like they did to my late father Lt Col Ripper

        Like

    • 70
      jgm2 says:

      Yeah. Ed Miliband come out fighting. Just the man you’d want beside you in the trenches.

      Ha fucking ha.

      Like

      • 78
        Col Ripper of Braintree says:

        Well if ED carried a target on his chest and said get it here fritz you sausage munching hunnish homo whilst blowing a whistle he would be an ideal chap to have next to you

        Like

        • 86
          Bill Quango MP says:

          Hmmm .. Hun sniper more likely to be laughing so much at the trembling Miliband he’d miss him and hit you.

          Better to have John Prescott beside you. Or Eric Pickles. beside you and simultaneously in front. And behind.

          Like

          • Col Ripper of Braintree says:

            The huns make excellent shots, good eyes you see
            Now the Jap has slanty eyes and is short sighted terrible shot, damn clean though, my late father had the job of shaving the camp commandants pubic area once a week, a great honour according to Col Muji
            My father had to give his word as an officer to do no harm to the Nippon wedding tackle, punishment would have been the slow removal of his own wedding tackle

            Like

        • 93
          The Milli Ancestors says:

          We found either scarpering or fighting for the enemy strategically better options

          Like

        • 225
          EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

          You can keep i out of your little argument here – save that i do not want the son of a fucking dirty marxist doublecrossing bastard to EVER become the PM of this country.

          Like

  24. 79
    Scottish Voter says:

    Regarding Obama’s wish for Scots to vote to remain part of the UK.

    It would seem that all world leaders from Putin to Obama want the Scots to remain in the UK. Do you think any of those Leaders have Britain’s interest at heart? What’s in their interest in Scotland voting NO?

    Like

    • 120
      President Pootn says:

      Like

      • 125

        Send an aircraft carrier out.

        Oh!

        Like

        • 145
          A General says:

          With no aircraft above all

          We would not want Vlad to think we are serious

          Like

        • 156
          Tom Catesby says:

          What a sick joke! We probably couldn’t win an argument on a boating pond these days

          Like

        • 227
          EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

          Quick build thousands of offshore wind turbines – that’ll chop them pesky ruskies little boats to pieces.

          Like

        • 232
          EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

          SC – of last night – close to Argyll & Bute council – what a fucking bent council they have going there.

          Like

      • 150
        English nationalist says:

        Will Vlad please take Jockland off our hands please

        If he does a Crimea on Scotland, all members of the G7 will start crying

        Oh dear

        Like

      • 153
        Tom Catesby says:

        What will we jock do after September, if Putin sends fleet up the Clyde?

        Like

        • 163
          Vlad, being nice says:

          Want to join my EurAsian Partnership?

          Or would you prefer to surrender withiut a shot?

          Like

        • 311
          Anonymous says:

          Same thing we did to everyone else who tried to invade. You might want to look away, it can get messy.

          Like

      • 158
        Vlad in Paris says:

        It’s just our Summer Exercises to make you all wet your beds, again…

        PS And to encourage your ridiculous Prime Minister

        Like

        • 234
          EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

          Dave should consider – repealing gay marriage – that’d keep Vlad happy.

          Like

      • 291
        thespecialone says:

        Oh for fuck’s sake I was in the Andrew for 28 years there is nothing new in this. Media hype using the word “scrambled”. How does a ship “scramble” as scrambling means doing things quickly. A warship can do a max of around 28 knots and believe me that is not pleasant for the ship’s company. The media are desperate for a war aren’t they?

        Like

  25. 80
    The Mrs Merkel Show says:

    Please don’t antagonise Putin.

    In Germany we followed the green dream and shut all our nuclear and coal power stations. Now we have non of that nasty pollution. We meet all our targets on clean air..clever old us!
    Germany has outsoursced its pollution to France..And also to Russia.

    Unfortunately this means the Fatherland is entirely dependent on Russian Gas to run our factories. If they decide to turn off the tap then no more Volkswagens.

    So .. leave Putin alone, OK ? Or we are in the brown stuff.

    Like

    • 112
      London bankstrr says:

      Please leave the Laundry City of London out of this as well

      We need the hundreds of billions from Ukraine and Russia…we just love those pillaging oligarchs

      Like

    • 200
      I'm concerned-about your mental health says:

      Ve are doing ze right thingyz…..Just like the Chinese and Indians are…Ve must all take responsibility for our actions when it comes to carbon – hence I eat at least 2KG of burnt sausages/day. I vill digest ze carbon and export it to Uranus.

      Like

    • 206
      táxpáyér says:

      The germans have always been keen on gassing in the east,

      Like

  26. 81
    Anonymous says:

    #AnotherLabourThug

    Like

  27. 89
    If you vote for Rodger, he promises to Rodger you 365 (and a 1/4) day's of the Year. says:

    I’m an Art Student, hence I’m qualified to gauge colours and stuff. The Chart clearly shows that 4x the people questioned like Blue and not Yellow.

    Like

  28. 92
    Austin Tash says:

    Even though I’m a UKIP voter, that graphic makes the difference between in/out seem a lot more than two percent…

    Like

  29. 95
    The Milky Bar Kid says:

    “Sadly Obama didn’t give us his verdict on whether the people of Newark should go for Robert Jenrick or Roger Helmer today”

    Saying Britain should remain in the EU is a pretty clear hint.

    Like

    • 106

      Michael Payne is Nottinghamshire born and bred. Thanks to the support of the Labour government he was the first in his family to attend university. He, like me, studied Law and volunteered for the Citizens Advice Bureau whilst there to help, as I once did, the most vulnerable people in society, who are often also least able to represent themselves.

      As Deputy Leader of Gedling Borough Council and a Nottinghamshire County Councillor I am aware that he has a strong track record of delivering on his promises. He is an experienced campaigner and advocate – He knows Newark (yours, not ours obviously) is a great place to live, work and visit – he wants to make sure others know that too.

      His Grandfather was a Nottinghamshire miner, he remembers growing up with his stories about the Labour movement and the values it stands for – he and I both grew up believing in those values of social justice, fairness and compassion and they’re values we are both just as passionate about today.

      Whether as a student activist, local volunteer, school governor or in the town hall or Whitehall, Michael has always fought hard on behalf of people and been focussed on helping people reach their full potential in life – whatever their background, whatever their zip code.

      Like

      • 226
        Fishy says:

        Has he had a real job?

        Like

      • 250
        Aneurism Bevan says:

        Just what the country needs — another wealthy Labour lawyer pretending to be a ‘man of the People.’ The Working Man’s Party no longer seems to have anyone in it but liars ‘n’ lawyers (often conflated)!

        Like

      • 289
        An old Minor, don't touch me copper's I'm only 12 says:

        WTF are you on about? I’ve heard some drivel before but that takes the biscuit. Are you a biscuit Minor?

        Like

    • 244
      EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

      Obambi should fook right off and take that annoying fucking tory wanker Brooks Newmark with him.

      Like

  30. 96
    Poosh says:

    Scots should vote “no” to “freedom” ??? eh…

    Because less freedom under the auspices of independence, and greater statism, is “freedom” … gotcha.

    As if Scottish independence is anything to do with freedom or self-autonomy lol

    Like

  31. 97
    Pitchfork says:

    Slightly dodgy graph there Guido.

    Do you work for the Lib Dems?

    Like

  32. 98
    Jack the Ripper says:

    40% still want to stay in the corrupt pig club? Surely not.

    Like

    • 126
      Ed Moribund says:

      Well I’ve got 30% on my team and I demand we must stay in EU.
      Then there are 10% of idiot lib Dems. Green fools. People who think they wouldn’t be able yo buy French wine if we left the EU. That’s another 5%.

      And 5% are so stupid they either didn’t understand or incorrectly answered the question.

      Like

  33. 100
    Bishop, David Laurence - Bus-Pass Elvis Party says:

    Everyone likes a bit of ketchup right?

    Like

  34. 101
    Blind_leading_the_blind says:

    ” Always one for statistical excellence, Guido brings you the findings in a format LibDem HQ would be proud of:…” Guido, 27th May

    Nine days is a long time in politics

    Like

  35. 103
    Scottish Power-Charging 1/5 more because you Pre-Pay rather than Paying by Direct Debit 3 Mths later says:

    Just who is Cameron ‘threatening’. Ze German’s or the GBP. We’ve already planted our flag where we want our Nation to be. He’s running from REAL Democracy yet uses that as a threat. Talk about being between a cock and a Lard Place.

    Like

  36. 105
    Plea says:

    A 2% difference looks colossal in that graphic.

    Like

  37. 108
    Col Ripper of Braintree says:

    Local exit polls have UKIP 2% ahead of the Cons

    Like

  38. 114
    A European says:

    The sooner Britain, with its criminal banks, neocon war criminals, criminal newspapers, totally corrupt Parliament, crony capitalists and endless sordid stories of child abuse, hospital and school killings and moral collapse…

    Leaves the European Union

    The better…

    Like

  39. 115
    Tongsyabas says:

    Some Septic telling the Scots what to do? That’ll be a few hundred thousand more Yes votes then.

    Like

  40. 118
    Anonymous says:

    It is clear that Obama and his regime are fully signed up to the NWO of which the EU is just a part. Fortunately for us the rest of the US is not in agreement, the EU is failing and no one listens to Obama any more.

    Like

    • 129
      Brits stink says:

      When you have been the Poodle of the US and kissing their asses for years

      It is difficult to cut the umbilical cord

      And the Europeans don’t want you either…

      Perhaps you will join the African Union)))

      Like

      • 209
        The Ghost of the English Language says:

        A poodle with an umbilical cord, kissing 300 million bottoms? It sounds like a David Cronenberg film.

        Like

    • 166
      Jezza says:

      Obama? That guy who swapped 5 mad muzzers for a deserter?

      Like

  41. 121

    My seaweed soundings were taken last night. They only tell the truth. The exit polls will show this. Of those who vote today, the share will be as follows:

    UKIP 33%
    CON 32%
    LAB 26%
    BUSPASS ELVIS 4%
    LIBDEMS 3%
    OTHERS 2%

    God Save The Queen.

    Like

    • 123
      Spunker says:

      Wuf wuf

      Wags his tail

      And pees on Cast Iron’s trousers

      Like

      • 202
        mark thyme says:

        SC keeps the seaweed down his trousers to keep it moist, and I don’t mean the seaweed.

        Like

        • 245

          Tonight, I had the lovely experience of being greeted by a waitress at my favourite restaurant at my FKK site, who is not working there until the high season in August. Instead, she is there on holiday with her mother and boyfriend.

          Her blonde shiny hair was hanging down and almost touching her bottom (in the restaurant she has to keep it tied back for obvious reasons). We cuddled together, not for the first time, I will admit but by far the closest that we have ever done so. It was a close encounter at every level. It was a spontaneous act as we weren’t expecting to see each other. It was lovely. Perfect even.

          It was not possible to ignore her long, long suntanned legs and arms, tight waistline and firm breasts pressed hard into me. Her body is beautifully skinny and healthy.

          She is considerably younger than I am. But tonight I saw her in a new light. I could, oh, I could. Never really thought about her before except that I always enjoyed her outgoing character.

          If I see her unclothed there tomorrow, I am frightened that I might have an uncontrollable happy moment…

          Like

    • 212
      Bosun Higgs says:

      What does it mean when your bladder-wrack goes limp and slimy?

      Like

  42. 132

    The interesting thing about Newark is that its name is an anagram of Dave…

    Liked by 1 person

  43. 136
    Cast Iron Dave, disappearing up his own backside says:

    I will tell our good friend Vlad tomorrow that we will never impose financial sanctions on Russia

    My bankster paymasters would never forgive me

    Like

  44. 137
    AJP Teapot says:

    Tonight is the 70th anniversary of the reason the French dislike us so.

    Shame mostly.

    Shame, embarrassment and guilt. And of course when you’ve seen someone utterly humiliated and they are totally dependent on you for help, they will despise you forever.

    You’ve seen them emasculated, you see. Seen them crushed. Seen them beaten with no self respect left. No man can live with that.

    So the Frenchies hate us. Hate us for ever seeing them at their weakest and most defeated and pathetic.

    Like

    • 191
      Mustapha Fatwa says:

      Like we people but we take you over and….you let us. Imbeciles.

      Like

    • 213
      Realist says:

      They hate us because we liberated the bastards just when they had managed to learn the words to Deutschland Uber Alles. But what they really hate of course is that it gave french women the opportunity to screw an invader who was not german.

      Like

  45. 148
    Nick Fag says:

    Another bloody day of people telling me to reding tomorrow. Calls for bus pass Elvis to become leader of the liberal party.

    “He got more votes than you did, nick!”

    Well Bollox. I’m not resigning. You’ll have yo kill me to get me out of my deputy PM office. Kill me or give me a very good, well paid job in Paris.

    Like

    • 159
      John Bellingham says:

      It is significant that when the Raving Monster Loony Party say really daft things, they are not being serious, whereas the Lib-Dems…………………………………..

      Like

  46. 149
    Anonymous says:

    I’m impressed with all those medals Charlie boy has. Can’t remember the wars be fought in though, perhaps they are for shagging Camilla in different positions?

    Like

  47. 151
    non taxable pikey says:

    Not being a person who fully understands the Banking system it is sometimes hard to work out just what is happening, but the ECB negative interest rates etc seem to suggest to me that the EU is totally Fucked.

    Like

    • 186
      Mustapha Fatwa says:

      Clearly on the Japan road, without the discipline. Who is going to tell them they’ve got at least another fifteen years of this?

      Like

      • 214
        táxpáyér says:

        15? I doubt they’ve got that long. It’s going to look more “socialist paradise” very soon.

        After all, the Euro-peons savings will be looted to keep the establishment in the custom they’ve become acquainted to.

        Like

    • 254
      EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

      And the banksters in the city of london, the vatican and IMF should be S/hitting their pants too.

      Like

  48. 180
    David Spoonfaced Botox says:

    Wee Wiile and I have agreed with Omaha Beach that we should invade Jockland

    They will then understand the Shock and Awe of British military might

    And Alex Salmon will be smoked alive…

    Like

  49. 182
    Mustapha Fatwa says:

    It is wanting a good edukatshu in the birminghum so wee neeed flour teeckars to show good way of aallah. Eenglisher go he’ll.

    Like

  50. 184
    the lodger says:

    Whichever way it goes we’re gonna get rogered.

    Like

  51. 193
    President Hollande's mistress says:

    My loverboy is having a busy evening

    Dinner with that funny Mr O’bama at 7.00

    Then a “souper” with my favourite man, Vladimir, at 9.00

    He is then due to jump on his scooter, driven by one of Vladimir’s officers, to come and have some rolly poly with me (is that what you call it in English) to get over the strain of it all

    Like

  52. 203
    Anonymous says:

    LibDem style bar chart.

    Like

  53. 215
    Col Ripper of Braintree says:

    less than two hours before Nigel descends from the heavens and that jelly fish disappears back to London

    ROB4WANKKER

    Like

    • 269
      Come down O Nigel says:

      Descend amongst O Nigel and smite the jellyfishes for verily they have sorely stung us.

      Like

  54. 228
    Corieltavi says:

    Newark is made of overnight progressive Socialists.
    Blow warm air over them they glow Blue.
    Blow cold air they glow Red.
    Independence is still a growing concept.
    But never underestimate – this year – or next.

    Like

  55. 231
    Blue Peter Goldfish says:

    I can’t make my mind up whether to vote for Barack Obama or Manuel Barroso as they both have very similar views on the governance of other countries and plenty of advice on how its citizens should vote.

    Like

    • 267
      EU democracy my arse says:

      It is most difficult to know how to chose in these matters.
      But how fortunate we are to have the decisions made for us,
      with all thanks to support from the freedom loving yankees of Barry Obarma

      Like

  56. 236
    Mustapha Fatwa says:

    Lutratfur is bring the post ally votings in soon, then result for glorious religion, (peaceful), then we strike you.

    Like

  57. 238
    Bishop, David Laurence - Bus-Pass Elvis Party says:

    Double espresso and a Soberano? Don’t mind if I do!

    Like

  58. 239
    Anonymous says:

    GOD

    What a truly remarkable woman

    The Queen lights up the Champs-Élysées: Her Majesty – in her third chic outfit of the day – is greeted by Francois Hollande as she arrives in Paris for state visit to commemorate D-Day

    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2649650/Her-Majesty-dazzles-navy-cream-boards-Eurostar-Paris-not-makes-one-little-flower-girls-day.

    God save the Queen.

    Like

    • 259
      EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

      She is suborned to the vices of her bent and generally corrupt Ministers. Why didn’t she ad lib that bloody Cameron speech with her own words … That would have shown some courage.

      Like

  59. 243
    Thick as a Plank says:

    Nice graph! Clever use of a skewed Y-axis perfected by the Lib Dems and enhanced by Fatty Fawkes.

    Like

  60. 246
    Nigel in Malta says:

    Helma got that crutch off a disabled Tory voter.

    Like

  61. 252
    Nick Clegg says:

    Bus-Pass Elvis. Love it. :)

    Like

  62. 253
    Totally confused says:

    Barry Obama charged with sex offences and Garry Glitter tells the Scots to stay in.

    Like

  63. 255
    Bishop, David Laurence - Bus-Pass Elvis Party says:

    Baron Oakeshott of Seagrove Bay says that the Lib Dems have “no roots, no principles and no values”, I’ve been saying that for last 4 years

    Like

    • 272
      Jeremy Thorpe killed my dog says:

      I quite agree

      But the Liberal Party kept me and Jo Grimond and many other skivvers in gin and tonics for decades…

      It was always a huge scam…continued by that spoilt good for nothing Cleggie….

      Like

  64. 257
    PC says:

    Why rape Rhiannon Brooker when you have a right hand, FFS?

    Like

  65. 258
    PC says:

    Why ra’pe Rhiannon Brooker when you have a right hand, FFS?

    Like

  66. 260
    07889 189178 says:

    Gissa a new sim card please?

    Like

  67. 261
    Barry O'Barmy says:

    Now guys, you all gotta vote Presidente Fewrer Merkel
    What d’y mean y caint vote. Well dont matter nuthin anyhows
    Just support the Fewrer like we told ya
    Y’ know it makes sense.
    And yes u can.

    Like

  68. 262
    The British media are cunts says:

    So according to the left, it’s OK to have schools that are 99.4% Muslim but not ones that are mostly white.

    Must be pissing the lefties off though that the Mussies don’t want their kids taught about bum sex.

    Like

  69. 263
    Nige's Beach Boys says:

    Woldn’t it be nice if we could wake up

    Finding Slimey took it up the chuff

    And wouldn’t it be nice if he would break up

    Cos he’s been so absolutely duff.

    Like

  70. 266

    Toenails just asked me for my mobile number.

    I told him to fuck off, of course.

    Like

  71. 271
    Anonymous says:

    Not sure how good this will be,worth a try?

    Like

    • 286
      Ratfur says:

      Webcast? Amateurs!

      You want your whole extended family in there, pushing people around and shouting, peering over the counters’ shoulders and scribbling on any votes for your opposition, then saying the vote is spoiled because someone has scribbled on it.

      Like

    • 297
      Anonymous says:

      Live feed at 10.00 is late? Fishy

      Like

  72. 275

    Ten minutes away from the biggest earthquake yet in British politics.

    Like

  73. 276
    The Spirit of Runnymede says:

    Let us wish the spirit of King John, departed this world at Newark in 1216, grant us a great victory over the slithery serpent of the LiblabCon.
    In commemoration of the project for freedom and democracy begun in 1215.

    Like

  74. 277
    Fucked off says:

    I’ll tell Abama something ‘fuck off back home and keep your nose out of my life’ and at the same time sort your own in house shit out

    Like

  75. 281

    Like

  76. 282
    Brillo says:

    Don’t miss the Newark by-election special with Brillo and co. Starts 11.35 and goes on till 3am with live results. Tune in to see Bus Pass Elvis destroy the Lib Dems.

    Like

  77. 290
    Anonymous says:

    Like

  78. 293

    Purple sunset over Newark tonight.

    Like

  79. 294
    LOL says:

    Like

  80. 300
    Owen Jones says:

    D Day is just a symbol of imperialist western capitalism and all those who died were just hideously white men.

    Just don’t ask me to comment on female genital mutilation, honour killings, suicide bombings, muslim patrols, child marriage, public execution of gays, christians on death row in Sudan, and a pregnant woman stoned to death in P*kistan. But I will talk all day about the need to lynch Jeremy Clarkson.

    Like

  81. 301
    Islamingham says:

    A glorious night for the new UK. Victory is ours to lose. Ofstedding be gone.

    Like

  82. 303
    Golden Hillock a muslim shithole says:

    This school in Birmingham has exposed children to extremism. And who do the bbc interview to show parents are happy with the school? Two fucking muslims! That’s like asking Anjem Choudhry if he thinks Hamas are treated unfairly.

    Like

  83. 304
    Lessons will be learned says:

    One baby has died and another 17 are seriously ill from contaminated feed. You can be assured no one will held to account, no one will be sacked or arrested, and we’ll get the usual corporate bullshit of “going forward lessons will be learned”.

    Like

  84. 306
    Gordon Brown says:

    I like a nice big shiny ballot box.

    Like

  85. 307

    Vote UKIP :-D

    Like

  86. 308
    Anonymous says:

    Like

  87. 314

    Vote UKIP :-D

    Like

  88. 322
    Walter says:

    I know the purpose of your blog – which I read daily, from Fife, even though I occasionally disagree with you – is to view political events through the London prism, and Scotland must seem worlds away. Nonetheless, I am surprised at what cursory time you appear to have spent examining the issues and the individuals involved in the Scottish independence debate, especially since the ramifications of a Yes vote would change English politics forever.

    While I am in the Better Together camp, and would be so through emotion even if the finances were not so utterly compelling, I would respect your opinion more if you applied your usual analytical focus to this issue.

    “…that the Scots should vote no to freedom…”. Really? It’s slightly more complex than Braveheart, you know. Please give it some proper thought Guido, I would be genuinely interested to read your informed opinion.

    Like

  89. 330
    John Tandy says:

    More like 60/40 to leave……

    Like

  90. 331
    lolGreece says:

    Guido now brought to you by the lib dem infographics team.

    Like

  91. 332
    NathanD says:

    Why does a 2 % difference have such a dramatic graphical representation?

    Like


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