May 28th, 2014

Oakeshott Quits: Resignation Statement in Full

“I am today taking leave of absence from the House of Lords and resigning as a member of the Liberal Democrats. I am sure the Party is heading for disaster if it keeps Nick Clegg; and I must not get in the way of the many brave Liberal Democrats fighting for change.

I leave, with a heavy heart, the party I helped to found with such high hopes with Roy Jenkins, Bill Rodgers, Shirley Williams and David Owen at Limehouse in 1981. We then, like most Liberal Democrats now, wanted a radical progressive party, not a “split the difference” Centre Party, with, in Shirley’s memorable words, no roots, no principles and no values. But that is where Nick Clegg has led us.

I am sorry I have so upset and embarrassed my old friend Vince Cable and that we were not able to talk before he issued yesterday’s statement from China. This is the background:

Several months ago a close colleague, concerned about voting intentions in Twickenham, asked me if I would arrange and pay for a poll to show us Vince’s current position and how best to get him re-elected. I was happy to help, and Vince amended and approved the questionnaire, but at his request I excluded a question on voting intentions with a change of leader. Although Vince had excellent ratings, both as a Minister and a local MP, he was slightly behind the Conservatives in this poll, as the full details on the ICM website  show. That poll worried me so much that I commissioned four more in different types of constituency all over the country and added back the change of leadership question. The results were in the Guardian yesterday and on the ICM website. Several weeks ago, I told Vince the results of those four polls too.

The combined message of these five professional and reputable ICM constituency polls, Nick Clegg’s dire approval ratings year after year in all national polls, and Thursday’s appalling council and European election results is crystal clear: we must change the leader to give Liberal Democrat M.P.s their best chance to win in 2015. On Thursday I also commissioned one more ICM poll, in Inverness, Nairn, Badenoch and Strathspey; the results should also be on the ICM website tonight.

A few stout-hearted M.P.s and peers and hundreds, maybe soon thousands, of candidates, councillors and Lib Dem members all over Britain are now fighting constituency by constituency for a leadership election. I have tried to give them the evidence they need to make the change. I pray that they win, and that the right man, or preferably, woman is now elected to save the Party.

When Charles Kennedy rang to make me a peer, from a panel elected by the party, fourteen years ago he said he wanted me to shake up the Lords. I’ve tried – my bills to ban non-dom peers are now law – but my efforts to expose and end cash for peerages in all parties, including our own, and help get the Lords elected have failed. I am very sorry to leave my many old, close comrades-in-arms on the Liberal Democrat benches all over Britain, and good friends and fellow campaigners across the House. But the unreformed Lords is now a bloated balloon and at 67 it’s time to concentrate on running my business and my charity.”



  1. 1
    Son of Leon says:

    I’m staying put.

  2. 2
    YesAllWomen says:

    The phrase “preferably woman” is sexist and patronising to the point of condescension. Rapist.

  3. 3
    BBC Spokesman says:

    Today’s News:

    Royal Baby . . .

    Chancellor’s Cat

  4. 4
    Another Welsh Windbag says:

    That’s the LibDems really f@cked then

  5. 5
    Mike Hancock says:

    Becoming an Independent is all the rage in the Lib Dems these days.

  6. 6
    LOL says:

    I am sure the Party is heading for disaster if it keeps Nick Clegg

    And the problem with that is???

  7. 7
    The fallen angel says:

    And so it starts…

    Clegg gone by the weekend methinks????

  8. 8
    dai payrolly says:

    it shows why we need an elected second house

  9. 9
    SS says:

    Over the last 40 + years or so all political parties have moved to the left, now with the arrival of UKIP results last week, the intention of the people is to move to the right again, so there is no need for the Liberal party, vote left = Labour, middle = Conservative, and correctly right = UKIP.

  10. 10
    Baracco Barner says:

    Is this a principled Liberal Democrat I see before me?

  11. 11
    Toxic Labour for Spongers, Parasites, Criminals, Layabouts & other Wasters says:

    He missed the “must be a rabid pervert” part.

  12. 12
    Clogg says:

    Me too.

  13. 13
    Bild says:

    Kate’s arse.

  14. 14
    John Adlington says:

    He really doesn’t like Nick Clegg – hilarious!

  15. 15
    Anonymong says:

    No, it really, really isn’t.

    Just 5 minutes on google will tell you all you need to know. This bloke is a grade a cnut.

  16. 16
    Yves Droppeur says:

    Having a hard time caring . . .

  17. 17
    Exit Polly says:

    Lawdy lawdy man – you jus’ come from Specsavers?

  18. 18
    tube_thumper says:

    message to all politicians.

    Look at the news pictures of the campsite being cleared ythe french today.

    These economic migrants have already reached Europe and are in france where they could find work. Why the fuck do they live like animals to0 get the extra step to Britain. simple BENEFITS stupid !!!

    I dont want anymore sponging fuckers here. I dont care how bad their own fucking coutries are let them fight for change. NO MORE IMMIGrants they add nothing and alienate English people within their own towns. If i want to experience their marvellous cultures i can visit their countries to do so

  19. 19
    RomaBobbieBooBoo says:

    Hmmmmm……… :)

  20. 20
    tube_thumper says:

    he emant preferrably women with big tits that are willing to get them out whilst campaigning. A sure vote winer

  21. 21
    Baracco Barner says:

    You missed the irony.

  22. 22
    Armchair Proctologist says:

    Staggeringly far up his own arse

  23. 23
    James O'Bottom says:

    Why is it that all Lib/Dims bar none have strange leftie opinions. Hopefully we are now rid of them but they could be replaced by the virtually identical ‘Green’ Party who outpolled them. The leftie establishment/BBC may well get behind them.

  24. 24
    tube_thumper says:

    this is a virus. i has this on my pc yesterday

  25. 25
    Norm Normal says:

    Anyone else think the Lords was better as it was? Since the reform its packed with party crazies and troughers. The hereditary peers didn’t do much but common sense usually prevailed.

  26. 26
    Anonymong says:

    Some simple questions the hacks never seems to ask…..

    Why are they in Europe at all?

    What benefit do they provide?

    Why haven’t they been deported?

    Why are they so keen to get to the UK?

    Why are our journalists such naive, unquestioning, halfwits?

  27. 27
    Fruitcake, swivel eyed loony and closet racist says:

    Matthew, you daft twat. You should have done a bit of kiddy fiddling or maybe a bit of pervy stuff with party workers.

    You’d have been fine as far as Mr 7% was concerned.

    Vote UKIP, get UKIP.
    Vote Tory, get Labour.

  28. 28
    Anonymong says:

    You need to write a little better.

  29. 29
    The Dutch Ambassador says:

    Clegg goes when I tell him to go

  30. 30
    Paul Wright says:

    Wow! No mincing of words here…….!

  31. 31
    Gloria Gaynor says:

    Go on now, go walk out the door
    Just turn around now
    ‘Cause you’re not welcome anymore

  32. 32
    Vince Cable says:

    A fiver says we lose our deposit in Newark

  33. 33
    BBC 24hr rolling bollocks says:

    The Green party are picking up the beard and toe jam vote.

  34. 34
    Steve Miliband says:

    Sanctimonious twat of the Sanctimonious Party

  35. 35
    Arf says:

    Prince William?

  36. 36
    Charabanc says:

    Conservatives seem to be arranging a day out to Newark on Saturday.
    Newark residents might also decide to have a day out, Harrogate looks nice at this time of year

  37. 37
    Reality says:

    Hard Left = Labour
    Soft, middleclass, twattish Left = “Dave’s Conservatives”
    Centre = UKIP

  38. 38
    Bessie Banks says:

    We’ve already said goodby, so if you gotta go go now . .

  39. 39
    tube_thumper says:

    they all look like cutthroats and n’eer do wells to me. If I think that then they should be allowed in. a bit like if a black person thinks i am looking at them strangely they can accuse me a of being a racist.

    The BBC allow ridulous statements and dont question them in case the dreaded I word should be exposed as the casue of national discontent on this subject.

    I never used to be racist but the BBC have caused me to think that way. Perhaps i could sue them

  40. 40
    BBC 24hr rolling bollocks says:

    The most exciting thing written by a LibDem in decades and I still fell asleep after the first paragraph.

  41. 41
    Norm Normal says:

    I don’t like the green parties unscientific and quasi-religious stance on the environment.
    Ecoloons and ex-commies who belive in magic, nonsense and eco-fairy tales.

  42. 42
    Anonymous says:

    I knew Oakeshott from his days as a fund manager: he was virulently unpleasant and poisonously rude to everyone in those days and it sounds like the leopard hasn’t changed its spots.
    Punch used to run a competition to find the more unpopular fund manager in the City and they eventually stopped doing it when Oakeshott kept winning it. Says as much about Uncle Vince that he hitched his caravan to this man and they have both got their come uppance.
    I don’t like the Lib Dems or Clegg, but I feel sorry for them and him having to deal with someone as disloyal and unpleasant as this man and they’ll be better off without him.

  43. 43
    wycombewanderer says:

    How can thje government continue with Cable in it he’s briefed against the conservatives, damaged the government in untold ways and now has his fingerprints all over a leadership bd.

    He has to go today.

  44. 44
    Morgan's Organ says:

    Clearly exposes Cable as a disloyal scheming toad who now, despite all his plans, has chickened out of leading this sceptic bunch of wastrels.

  45. 45
    I, Tony Blair, leader of the Likid party make a declaration here. AND now says:

    look I am kind of a guy.
    and guys like us clean up.
    we create the mess. we clean the mess. party over.

  46. 46
    Engineer says:

    Oakeshott is missing the point.

    A majority of the electorate voted (those that could be bothered to vote, at any rate) for parties opposed to the EU, or to greater EU integration. So for the Lib Dems to ritually sacrifice their leader without then changing their very pro-EU and integrationist policy will achieve precisely nothing for them electorally.

    It’s the policy that needs changing, not the leader.

  47. 47
    RomaBobbieBooBoo says:

    FFS a time traveller also?

  48. 48
    Every Flipping Trougher in Westminster says:

    It shows why we all need a second home. And a third.

  49. 49
    Jobbies for the boys says:


    Lord Coe is the clear favourite to be the new chairman of the BBC Trust,

  50. 50
    RomaBobbieBooBoo says:

    Life was better before the fall of the Iron Curtain and before Liebor f*cked up the country with their social engineering!

  51. 51
    CHRIST ON A BIKE! says:

    I haven’t seen anybody talk about what the real problem is with the Lib Dems?
    It nothing to do with Nick Clegg but everything to do with not being the default party of protest anymore which was lost when they took part in government.

    For over thirty years, they have taken votes from Labour and Tory, in the south, in the north, in Scotland in England and Wales. From white and non-white, in urban areas and in provincial and rural areas. They were the all-purpose cop-out and protest vote. What manifesto or policies they had were of absolutely no consequence. Their current level is basically the pre-SDP / Liberal alliance level. A big chunk has gone to UKIP (their complete antithesis in terms of policy) with the rest back to Conservatives and Labour.

  52. 52
    The Party od IN says:

    Well, at least nearly 70% of Gibraltarians voted for us!

  53. 53
    bergen says:

    And Nick Clegg would be their worst possible leader apart from the entirety of the parliamentary party. They’re going to have to hang together because they’ll certainly all hang separately.

  54. 54
    jgm2 says:

    It’s a numbers game.

    Better that disaffected LibDem bedwetters go to the Greens than to Labour.

  55. 55
    Norm Normal says:

    All the lib dems seem to exist in their own little world. The huge mountain of evidence that their philosophy, leader and policies were at odds with the will of the people didn’t register.
    Then they respond to the election disaster by telling the electorate to go fuck themselves whilst cooing how proud they are of themselves for doing so!

    Finest case of political suicide I can remember.

  56. 56
    Breaking Wind says:

    Breaking news:Nick Clegg jumps sinking ship.

  57. 57
    Anonymous says:

    If only it were so simple to create an elected HoL We haven’t even got a democratic and accountable HoC.

    I was not sure whether Oakshott had a particular female leader in mind for the LibDems or if he was just being sexist in favour of that gender. can anyone clarify?

  58. 58
    Osama the Nazarene2 says:

    Spot on Engineer.

  59. 59
    FubarSaunders says:

    thank f*ck for that. Maybe now Matthew Oakshott will shut the f*ck up.

  60. 60
    Here come the bilderbergs! says:

    Not many Russians at the Bilderberg meeting this year, couldn’t imagine why?

    Mandlebum will be there.

  61. 61
    WoRaft Chihuahua says:

    It is like blaming the wooden figurehead for the ship sinking. The real problem is the ship’s hull is riddled with holes. One of them is Vince.

  62. 62
    my nickers says:


  63. 63
    constituency trainbound says:

    like a bunny in the headlights … spineless unreliable leader with genial manner but flawed political judgement founded on self delusion after the first TV debate.

  64. 64
    Lord Ohshit says:

    After fourty years of perks without responsibility Clegg forces us from our comfy office under the stairs into government.
    In less than four years this party is destroyed.
    I ask you.
    Do the LibDems want a leader like that?
    I say ‘No’
    We want a leader who doesn’t lead,a man with absolutely no hope of ever being in government.
    A man happy to sit with his thumb up his bum in-between filling in expenses forms and fucking his secretary.
    I propose we re elect our least most successful leader.
    Paddy Pantsdown.

  65. 65
    Shirley Williams says:

    I’m an old bat who did a lot to destroy education so fit the socialist mindset. I’m in the HoL but will I do?

  66. 66
    bergen says:

    They’re a divorcing couple going home-Libs to the greens, Dems (SDP) to Labour.

  67. 67
    Perry Neeham says:

    Dead right. Not much point swapping Clegg for some other berk when they’ll just have to get rid of the new one this time next year.

  68. 68
    Engineer says:

    I’ve been saying exactly that for years. The second chamber made up of hereditary peers and a few ‘others’ may be all wrong in theory, but it actually worked rather well in practice. What we now have is an over-politicised mess.

    Personally, I’d ask (well, instruct) all peers appointed since 1997 to stand down, and invite the hereditories back. I think the second chamber would improve very quickly if we did that. Save a fortune on elections, selection committes, dodgy donor scandals and all that, too.

    Won’t happen, of course. Can but dream.

  69. 69
    Claggy says:

    Can I have a choccie biccie please?

  70. 70
    UKIP Hacking at the roots with the truth says:

    Well the two do somehow go together.

  71. 71
    my embassy says:

    u take me shoeNO … i take u shoNO?
    now sqing into the plastic….and it,s a BSBY foul.

  72. 72
    jgm2 says:

    Exactly. People get all arch and suggest that UKIP will now come under pressure about policies other than EU and immigration but the LibDems had policies up the ying-yang. Whichever constituency they were campaigning in they had a ‘policy’ or a bar-graph.

    Then when, after 100 years, they finally got a sniff of power it turned out that their policy wasn’t worth the paper it was written on. But that’s not exclusive to the LibDems. The Maximum Imbecile went and had a court to declare that Labour policy wasn’t worth the paper it was written on.

    All the main parties have ‘policies’ which they sell the electorate once every five years and then promptly renege on.

    I fail to see why Clegg is being singled out.

  73. 73
    Who really benefited from the Olympics? says:

    Someone audit his personal assets and bank accounts. Here and abroad.

  74. 74
    my ledt foot is naked says:

    the orher doot is electrified.

  75. 75
    angela says:

    perhaps they’ve heard Le Penn’s speeches

  76. 76
    Norm Normal says:

    Has done untold damage to the nation with his meddling and press briefings. I actually despise him more than I despise Clegg.

  77. 77
    Garage says:

    FFS Oakeshott — we NEED Clegg

  78. 78
    My mum says it's time to go back to school says:

    As well as not being able to organise a piss up in a brewery, the Libcraps can.t even organise a coup in a Parliament.

  79. 79
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Good point.

    They rode the anti-fox hunting bandwagon for years and years before Tony ended that ride for them. Then they were the anti-war party for a long time.
    They were even, locally in every seat they contest, the ‘save the post office’ party. Although their actual Post office policies have, or will, cause over 50% to close by 2018.
    I had a meet with their PO minister not long ago who insisted that wasn’t the case.

    But it is.

  80. 80
    Indigo Tide says:

    Aah, a bit of flagwaving to try and save wicked Auntie

  81. 81
    norty113 says:

    ues less .aa it is used leaa. now wilt what u have savesthreenumbers.

  82. 82
    Anonymous says:

    Vote Tory. Get Tony.

  83. 83
    prince says:

    pinkie is afruitcke.

  84. 84
    Tom from Burnham on Sea says:

    How is Nick going to cope without Lord Oakshit ?

  85. 85
    duty Pedant says:

    Le Pen.

  86. 86
    My mum says it's time to go back to school says:

    Poor Cable the Triumphal Arch he was hoping to ride through on his white charger, collapsed before he was a thousand miles away, typical Libcrap hypocrisy.

  87. 87
    robocock says:

    Much of his letter sounded good. Except for this part:

    I pray that they win, and that the right man, or preferably, woman is now elected to save the Party.

    It reminded me instantly why virtually every LibDem is an utter twat. Sooner or later, to the cheers of the morons such as Harperson, Cathy Newman, Stella Creasy, Hadley “a bit spesh” Freeman, Laurie Penny etc, there will be more and more laws banning men from increasing numbers of areas of life. They are already (special exception for Jack “big black cocks” Dromey) banned from running in various labour seats on account of being men. Just what will the screaming banshees as liddle called them demand next?

  88. 88
    That's her real name says:

  89. 89
    Nick Kane says:

    Blair set out to vandalise the Lords. It was fine as it was.

  90. 90
    WoRaft Chihuahua says:

    but my efforts to expose and end cash for peerages in all parties, including our own …… have failed.

    Names and prices, please. Do the LDs sell seats cheaper than their competitors?

  91. 91
    The Lone Ranger says:

    The twat certainly is missing the point. He would rather commission poll after poll rather than just take the answer given to him by the voters. Now go away and please please don’t come back.

  92. 92
    Indigo Tide says:

    Actually a LibDem implosion is good news… Lots of votes in Tory areas that won’t go to Labour.

    …and anyway, you’ve still got the horrific Laborg front bench, and bullshit Dave to shore up the vote.

  93. 93
    Post hoc says:

    Shock horror probe

  94. 94
    da bog says:

    or vindie.
    o she no lad. give her a whip anytime and she would swallow.

  95. 95
    Indigo Tide says:

    Auntie’s noncey bloomers.

  96. 96
    Politics is LOL says:

    Give the Limp Dumps a break. They all know they’re fucked and are just seeing out their last year in power and in parliament before they collect their fat pensions and one year’s salary. Don’t be surprised if 99% of them announce they’ll be stepping down before the election. They’d rather jump than suffer the ignominy of defeat. Of course Clegg won’t step down, but that will provide the delicious spectacle of seeing him lose his seat. “Were you up for Portillo?” will be replaced by “Were you up for Clegg?”

  97. 97
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    Pro-EU Pro-Mas Immigration LibLabConGreen 64% in Euro elections
    Anti-EU Anti-Mass Immigration UKIP 28% in Euro elections

    A majority of voters voted for Pro-EU Pro-Mass Immigration parties by more than 2 to 1.

  98. 98
    Idon'tneednodoctor says:

    Oakeshott is a dirty back stabbing sneaky rat, however the lib-dems deserve all they get.

  99. 99
    retardEd Miliband says:


  100. 100
    wave the green flag says:

    cracking frackers these greens

  101. 101
    eurythm too? what. a cunt says:

    oyes logarythmic scale

  102. 102
    Peter Hain says:

    Strong and assured performance by Ed at PMQ’s today

  103. 103
    Bumbling old conman Vince says:

    I don’t remember Oakeshott.

  104. 104
    Bill Quango MP says:

    It is a bit harsh for poor Cleggy.

    The previous incumbents killed some 100,000 civilians in countries that they decided to invade for reasons that even now they can’t explain.

    And yet their red rosette supporters seem quite happy with that situation.

  105. 105
    crankybleeder says:

    So a LibDem is to be disciplined because he asked the public for their opinion. There’s no room for that sort of thing in the Liberal Democrat party. Before you know it, they might actually start taking notice of us.

  106. 106
    Who can ever like that lying smug arsehole? says:

    Who does?

  107. 107
    i take no showers. Hin Merciful says:

    i just like your poo.

  108. 108
    Bill Quango MP says:

    David Owen. Why does he never appear anywhere? Shirley Williams is a permanent member of the Question Time panel.
    Yet old Owen is forgotten?

  109. 109
    by-stander says:

    How delicious to see these treacherous, unprincipled, self-serving rats turning on each other.

  110. 110
    Mark Menzies,Moderator says:

    From what I see there is nothing wrong with Nick Clegg’s bottom.

  111. 111
    mpm says:

    How is it possible to commission “damaging” opinion polls?

    Were they rigged? Or did they simply tell the truth?

    If they told the truth, why should Oakeshott be disciplined?

    The fact that he is an odious, arrogant, treacherous rat should have no bearing on the matter.

  112. 112
    constituency trainbound says:

    as a balance to the house they are peerless and thats why despite repeated cries for abolition they should remain

  113. 113
    Fat and pompous bellend Haigh says:

    He’s my friend is Seb.

  114. 114
    Steve Miliband says:

    What is a radical progressive party?

  115. 115
    mangochutney says:

    “But he said that “appropriate steps” will be taken..”

    Lord Rennard, Cyril Smith. “Appropriate steps” in the language of the LibDems equates to 4/5th’s of fuck all being done.

  116. 116
    Miriam says:

    Not right at this moment Nick. Can’t you see I’m busy?

  117. 117
    Robert Peston says:

    The man the liberals need to lead them is Vince Cable
    A guy I helped con the public into thinking they can trust.

  118. 118
    Fishy says:

    There is an interview that the BBC have now buried in their archive…a live interview from the last time the hoards were massing in Sangatte.

    Asked why he wanted to get to Britain, the Somali interviewee said that he ‘wanted to join his brother who was already there…his brother had told him to come and join him because the British gave him lots of money kept his family.’

    The BBC to my knowledge have never shown that interview ever again.

    Meanwhile in Poland….

    Roll up, roll up…get your free money courtesy of the British Tax Payer

  119. 119
    7% in the polls and falling fast says:

    “I pray that they win, and that the right man, or preferably, woman is now elected to save the Party.”

    Sexism. It’s what the LimpDums think is ‘progressive’.

  120. 120
    My mum says it's time to go back to school says:

    Is that Oakshot up there shouting Claggy I’am on top of the world .

  121. 121
    Minge 'mingy' Campbelloots with the truth says:

    I’m very toffy nosed and very important, and I’m glad that all this is blown up because my views a are wanted again. As I am very important and my views are pearls of wisdom deliverd in a most agrable fashion.

    I am not one hundred and thirty three as some people are sugesting.

  122. 122
    Danny Alexander, more than a useless oaf would be hard to find says:

    I would add ‘and more’.

  123. 123
    The Lone Ranger says:

    Spot on Engineer. The bastards had to alter the HoLs to make it more suitable as a second/third pension provider after some minor supposed transgression meant they had to leave the HoCs, BBC, or other common purpose gravy train.

  124. 124
    Purple Dogzzz says:

    The LibLabCon taking notice of the electorate?

    Why change the habit of a lifetime. They are so disconnected from the lives of ordinary people that only a complete dismantling of the political establishment will make any difference.

    The people now have to be put in charge of all important decisions facing the country – the cabal cannot and will not change.

  125. 125
    Ed Moribund says:

    Its almost the 70th anniversary of Obama Beach!

    What should I wear?
    Camouflage suit?
    Combat trousers?
    Highland kilt and bagpipes?
    Business suit, smart shoes but a steel Tommy helmet and a Sten gun?
    Commando black face and canoe?

    What would make look like a caring, man of the people, who is going to be best buddies with President Hilary Clinton in two years.

  126. 126
    Shirley Williams destroyed social mobility says:

    One that is to the left of Labour.

  127. 127
    constituency trainbound says:

    vote nigel get evans in drag

  128. 128
    ed milliband peoples representitive of somewhere up north i have to visit every now and again says:

    best have a referendum then,you should win it piece of piss

  129. 129
    We know the BBC is completely bent says:

    Why were fences invented?………………………Specifically for LibDems toperch on, including the truly odious Oakshott.

  130. 130
    constituency trainbound says:

    and how without them the tories wouldn’t have achieved anything … like boundary change tactic cleggie decided was his duck out of bath moment .. spineless waste of space

  131. 131
    Tight as a knats chuff says:

    Being Scottish he’s probably at home counting his pre decimalisation coin collection and celebrating how rich he is.

  132. 132
    7% in the polls and falling fast says:

    Because he’s a f*cking bore. When I worked for him in the late 80s, it was best not to attempt to engage him in any form of conversation because he’d just prattle on endlessly about proportional representation.

    “Hello Mr Owen, did you have a nice weekend?”

    DO: “No, because we need proportional representation.”

    “There’s an interesting article in the Independent, Mr Owen, have you read ..”

    DO: “No I have not, because I am busy thinking about proportional representation, which, as you know waffles on and on and on and on and on

  133. 133
    The Lone Ranger says:

    Agreed. But I’m not sure that policies other than EU and immigration matter right now to most voters.

  134. 134
    Aunt Hilda says:

    would he want it ?

  135. 135
    Aunties Bloomers says:

    He’s not there to save them. Most likely oversee the changes after the non-payment of the licence get’s downgraded to a civil matter.

  136. 136
    Londoner says:

    When did seeking the truth become a disciplinary matter?

  137. 137
    Barrister for the Defence says:

    If you have an elected House of Lords it would need to have an election midway through a Parliament, otherwise you could end up with both Houses being in the hands of one party which would not be good for democracy, all sorts of bad laws would go through on the nod and not be scrutinised, which is what the House of Lords is for.

    When we had hereditory peers most of them had no political axe to grind, and laws were given proper scrutiny, but since it has been stuffed with old pals and brown nosers, bad laws have been passed, which have been shown to be bad legislation before the courts of the land.

  138. 138
    Anonymous says:

    Will he be giving back his title? Thought not.

  139. 139
    Anonymous says:

    “…the party I helped to found with such high hopes with Roy Jenkins, Bill Rodgers, Shirley Williams and David Owen at Limehouse in 1981″
    I’m of an age to remember the good old days – the days of the Gang of Four, of Healey’s arrogance and Benn’s prominence – and spent that time working in and around Westminster. The strange thing is that I cannot remember Oakeshott for love nor money. He may have played a role in the SDP but for the life of me I can’t remember the jumped up ar$e at all. Did he really help to ‘found’ the SDP or is this yet another instance of his head being so far up his own rear end that can’t tell the time?

  140. 140
    Julian the Wonderhorse says:

    Contrast the vendetta and “steps” about to be waged against Oakshott and the complete lack of action against the various criminals and sex pests in the party of late, of which Nick Clegg “knew nothing”, all due to the “democratic nature” of the Limp Dumps.

  141. 141
    Sword says:

    How much did your family loot on D-day Ed?

  142. 142
    The Constitution says:

    What steps? He’s a member of the House of Lords. He can tell a mere commoner like Cleggy to fuck off with complete impunity.

  143. 143
    Cross Bench says:

    To be fair, sloppy seconds after Lord Retard can’t be much fun.

  144. 144
    My mum says it's time to go back to school says:

    Somehow I think the word complacency has taken on a different meaning now there’s a new boy on the political block, I wonder if John Lewis has run out of new underkecks, as these b’starts now have to look as if they are working for a living after doing nothing but taking public benefits for years.

  145. 145
    Spartacus says:

    Yes, that old song ”another one bites the dust” comes to mind

  146. 146
    Alvin says:

    “When Charles Kennedy rang to make me a peer- fourteen years ago ”

    – more likely he was desperately crashing around looking for the half empty bottle of gin he had mislaid and got you on the phone by mistake

  147. 147
    constituency trainbound says:

    He has been totally ineffectual in delivering his vote to the coalition … a key to the 5 year fixed termagreed upon.

    His reneging on particularly boundary changes crystallized his obvious lack of political finesse and his inability to restrain his colleague’s overblown ambitions palpable.

    The woes of thinking a good first timer hack at a tv debate is all it takes.

  148. 148
    The Silent Majority says:

    Lord Lard Arse – should get a job!

  149. 149
    Ctesibius says:

    Deeply unpleasant man. Eaten up with rage at accidentally finding himself NOT in the Labour Party. Lefty. A straight version of Mandelscum.

  150. 150
    Spartacus says:

    no prob – he will say his middle name is Mohammed, any such investigation will then be claimed to be racially motivated.

  151. 151
    GetDownShep says:

    He was Roy Jenkins’s spad apparently.

  152. 152
    End of the peer show says:

    Lordy lordy. By the way, did that apology ever arrive?

  153. 153
    GetDownShep says:

    Fair point well made.

  154. 154
    chukka yummy ... britain's dim song yuk says:

    you can lick one of my choccie logs if you like nick

  155. 155
    Two Lords a-leaping says:

    I agree with everyone except Nick.

  156. 156
    Ctesibius says:

    Don’t be unfair to Lord Oakshit. He helped found the SDP at the time in the same way that I helped found the United Kingdom.

  157. 157
    f'cukwits corner says:

    you’ve got something here … elsie from the sweet shop says shes in … harold the milkman might and the cat is keen … what ministry can we run ?

  158. 158
    Whatsisname says:

    I agree with Dick.

  159. 159
    my lace up says:

    the Ip cum.

  160. 160
    Anonymous says:

    Tell it to the Marines.

  161. 161
    baby ahrek needs l says:

    after grin goes it all lime, u limericklicious.

  162. 162
  163. 163
    constituency trainbound says:

    ‘policyless’ ukip are …. the future of british government all worked out on the back of a fag packet and a beer mat ( in pencil and subject to amendment to suit audience)

  164. 164
    constituency trainbound says:

    talking about ming like that is not nice …we know hes a old woman but hes harmless

  165. 165
    constituency trainbound says:

    how about your dad’s demob suit and michael foot’s jacket ?

  166. 166
    Unhygienix the Fishmonger says:

    How come he is just taking a leave of absence from the Lords and not resigning?

    He owes his position there to the Lib Dems and if he has now left them he should return his peerage.

  167. 167
    constituency trainbound says:

    thinking he was ringing Oaksey for a tip on the geegees

  168. 168
    constituency trainbound says:

    wake up and smell the fish

  169. 169
    Bob cuntface Crow says:

    I was stuck in a toilet a while back and I had a really good wank over pic of Cleggs wife in the Metro ,it was her or a photo of Farage with a pint and fag.

  170. 170
    Bill Quango MP says:

    makes sense to me.

  171. 171
    James o Brian says:

    I dont know.

  172. 172
    Onward to Newark says:

    Not forgetting my commie principles at the front of the Grunwick picket line and losing all those people’s jobs.

  173. 173
    grasmit says:

    The ghost of Norman Scotts dog hangs heavily over the party

  174. 174
    Eddie says:

    Ironic that the first people to leave Europe has turned out to be Lib Dem MEP’s… and now the first person to fall on his sword, in the aftermath of the election, is Lord Oakeshott – who was trying to get Clegg to fall on his.

  175. 175
    Purcell's Dealer says:

    Bye bye Beaker, you’ll be remembered as venal self-serving scum in Scotland, which given what a mendacious liar you are is probably a step up.

    Don’t hold your breath for the reward from Gideon & Dave for you have fuck all chance of ever getting ermine.

  176. 176
    constituency trainbound says:

    gladys steele ?

  177. 177
    FO office says:

    have you got those pearly gates under the cosh yet Bob ?

  178. 178
    publisher's note says:

    duly repenntent … arh

  179. 179
    Don't even fkn go there says:

    Does anyone actually care when and in which order the rats leave the sinking ship that is the lib Dem’s?

  180. 180

    Rats deserting the ship

  181. 181
    howdi says:

    I never agreed with Nick.

  182. 182
    ali baba's chief thief says:

    Quite so. There is no constitutional objection to a member seeking the views of the chaps on the Clapham omnibuses and then publishing his findings.

    If it has been made clear in such an exercise that Clegg is utterly useless and should leave the building immediately – well, why not?

  183. 183
    ali baba's chief thief says:

    She’s only there to supplement her meagre pension – and bore everybody else stiff with her astonishing ignorance. No wonder she fucked up our once excellent education system. Old bat should be taken out the back and dumped in the river.

  184. 184
    ali baba's chief thief says:

    … and don’t forget to give Queenie the invitation this year. People notice these things, especially the old soldiers….

  185. 185
    Lord High Executioner says:

    Quite so. I shall be very happy to resume my position on the benches.

  186. 186
    The Growler says:

    Why not let the electorate vote in a maximum of 500 Lords from all lords hereditary and ex politicos & other life peers, let them choose a constituency where they would like to stand (with family connections of course) let them stand for a term of say four years or even five years, maybe fou years would be better so we do not get one party in the HoC and HoL

  187. 187
    Lord High Executioner says:

    Be it noted that he is not only a commoner, he is an unwelcome foreign commoner too. Better get to sharpening my snickersnee.

  188. 188
    Big D says:

    The worthy lord doesnt get the fact that its not the Leader ( ghastly though he be ) thats the LDs problem .
    Its that they have proven to be nothing but opportunistic in every thing they do.
    Untrustworthy and false,saying one thing in one place the opposite in another and that they are in love with the EU whilst many of us ( more than their party ) absolutely loath and dispise everything it is and does.
    Vince Cable is another useless old man living in his own cloud cuckoo land .
    Amongst party members there appear to be a somewhat disproportionate amount of odd ball sandel wearing types some of whom have very strange personal backgrounds .

  189. 189
    Toxic Libdemosis pollutes River Trent says:

    How much shit can an Oakeshott shovel;
    Before an Oakeshott’s shit-shovelling gets him shot?

  190. 190
    The Growler says:

    I don’t know why Vince would want to stand he is 71, 21/2 years older than me, he seems to look a lot older than me, pack it in Vince old chap if not re elected enjoy the fruits of your labours over the years, get out and enjoy life you are not a masochist are you.

  191. 191

    No doubt the Somali ended up one of the thousand or so they gave “visas” to in order to close Sangatte.

  192. 192
    The Growler says:

    That’s nothing when Dave the Magnificent fails again to get a clear majority and has to watch Nige downing a pint, there’s nowt like a bunch of Conners turning on their leader, blood will flow, still he will get a lordship out of his present jobbie, auto biography payment, speaking engagements, directorships in lots of companies, after all he he is the heir of B’Liar.

  193. 193
    The Growler says:

    Make the best of it Cocky

  194. 194
    The Growler says:

    Did you go to the Gove academy for illiterates

  195. 195
    The real shirley Williams says:

    You just don’t get it,I had to do it for the public school boys and girls (which I am one) as the grammars school kids were taking our jobs and I succeeded see the Etonians are back but do they thank me?

  196. 196
    Manwel says:

    His wife will tell when.

  197. 197
    Oxbridge Buffoon-being 'superior' and generally getting paid loads for being very mediocre says:

    Westminster and the Lords STINK to high heaven of ‘Elitism’. May I just remind the clique that ‘How many Oxbridge Professor’s actually DID their Bachelors Degree’s in either Universities?’….Answers on the back of a postage stamp. They’re insular, adverse to change, pompous, aloof, etc, etc. They’re basically fucking mongrels who if it wasn’t for their ‘little Ministry of Silly Handshakes’ and ‘quiet little cliques and clubs’ they’d be fucking NOTHING. They work in collusion, and even in the face of public rejection, press-on with their own little agendas.

    What is the answer to this ‘infestation’ you may ask?

    My answer? Full PR, BAN Lobbying, and a ‘Swiss-style’ Democracy where the people gain back their rightful place of Control. They’ve run this Country into the ground with their marble-mouthed ‘politeness’ and posh words, but when it comes to the crunch, they’re no better than some skag-head on the dole when it comes to robbing the State of Money.

  198. 198
    om Catesby says:

    Cleggie next?

  199. 199
    Tom Catesby says:

    Good point and the limp dicks are missing it, people rejected the crap they have been spouting and punished the candidates at the first opportunity. Complete lack of trust in the limp dick policies. Whichever ‘glove puppet’ they have makes little difference.

  200. 200
    Tom Catesby says:


  201. 201
    Tom Catesby says:

    Handycock defeated, Handycock’s wife defeated, limp dicks lose control. F^cking super!!!!!

  202. 202
    Tom Catesby says:

    Oakshite can commission as many polls as he likes and continue with the usual limp dick ‘five card trick’ with statistics, surveys etc. He is in a massive state of denial like his limp dick playmates. The only poll that counted was the ballot box poll of last week, that blew his shite party of nonces, liars, crooks and perverts out of the water.

  203. 203
    Tom Catesby says:

    Sadly missed(not).

  204. 204
    Itchie and Scratchie says:

    Steady on, think you rather missed the point, Johnny Frenchman’s CRS was kicking the f^ck out of our next batch of culturally enriching and diverse immigrants, who will continue to benefit The UK by their presence. They’ll certainly continue to benefit from the benefits alright. I wonder if Ossie and Camer’s meeting at Chequers this morning was to organise the Red Cross at Dover to deal with the scabies epidemic?

  205. 205
    Tom Catesby says:

    We could get rid of the second chamber in it’s present form altogether. a number of countries with ‘democratic’ sytems we’d recognise, manage with a monocameral system (aka. One chamber).

  206. 206
    Disheartened Patriot says:

    Cleggy selling peerages – Call in Plod ASAP

  207. 207
    Nonplussed. says:

    I wonder who on earth the woman Lib Dem leader could be?

  208. 208
    Mr Weetabix (and NSA) says:

    Was there anything that Blair touched that he didn’t fuck up.

  209. 209
    St Vince of Incapable says:

    I am an old man in a hurry as the saying goes.
    I had no information on this, and certainly not involved in polling – errr I think.
    Who is this man Oakshot (sic), you say he is a lord?
    My backstabbing dagger is still in its scabbard.

  210. 210
    Just Saying. says:

    Ship of fools

  211. 211
    St Vince of Incapable says:

    Stop talking about me.
    The fact that my friend was trying to help MY career has nothing to do with me.

  212. 212
    Lard Prescott. says:

    I like it here as I can get pork pies and fish and chips every day, and then have a kip along with a few other fellow comrades. I get paid for this too.

  213. 213
    broderick crawford says:

    He looks good for 67

    “Ti6me now to concentrate on both my business and my wallet .
    Thank you “

  214. 214
    broderick crawford says:

    Could this be dog whistle for Lynne Featherstone ??

  215. 215
    broderick crawford says:

    Toss your sauerkraut with my wiener schnitzel !

  216. 216
    Joe Bloggs. says:

    Worse is that he is mediocre at his job, and it should have been given to a better person 2 years ago. I blame Cameron for this.

  217. 217
    broderick crawford says:

    All mad as a box of frogs .

  218. 218
    broderick crawford says:


    Is my brother s party involved in a by election around these
    parts imminently ?

  219. 219
    broderick crawford says:

    They should consider Fukushima . Heavenly air and water to die for I understand .

  220. 220
    broderick crawford says:

    Is this the ” preferable woman ” Buckshotte is talking about to lead them ?

  221. 221
    Downing your particulars says:

    He could sell an awful lot of peerages to Plod!

  222. 222
    Just Saying. says:

    Rotted right through

  223. 223
    tube_thumper says:

    innit. dont know what i was thinking

  224. 224
    Four Weddings and a Phone Tap says:

    do one you loser…. staged and managed in an effort to get Clegg his Commissars job

  225. 225
    The only Country in Europe not to have a Parliament is England says:

    Limp Dumbs struck down by Dutch Elm disease

  226. 226
    It All Depends on the Question says:

    Grow up mate

  227. 227
    Anonymous says:

    When Blunkett did a deal with French and took the unwashed scum in exchange for the frogs closing Sangatte is it true that that the Iranians are still in the same hotel in Londistan?

  228. 228
    Lord Retard says:

    My condiments exactly!

  229. 229
    Sheffield says:

  230. 230
    Lib Dems You gotta luv em says:

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Which ones Vince and which one is Huhne?

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