May 23rd, 2014

Caption Contest Winner

A typically large number of unfunny entries for today’s caption contest, but the winner of two tickets to the Freedom Association’s Magna Carta Day pimms and politics boat trip is:

Smilerman says:

Pull my finger and you get an election strategy

The winner, and only the winner, can get in touch here to collect their prize…


  1. 1
    Vince Cable's Rucksack says:

    What have you been on, today?


    • 5
      Socialism is theft says:

      The London results prove that where UKIP do badly, Labour make big gains. Therefore a vote for UKIP is a vote to stop Miliband.


      • 7
        UKIP massacred our fluffy bunnies Labour family says:

        Big Gains? When Labour are involved Big Losses are the norm!


      • 10
        Socialism is theft says:

        It is easy to explain how this works. In 2010 the Tories gained a lot of swing voters from Labour for wrecking the economy. But some of them have short memories and many would naturally have reverted back to Labour. UKIP has helped to to stop this happening by taking these votes.


    • 8
      Smilerman says:

      I’m the real Smilerman, honest. Does anyone want to buy two tickets to the Freedom Association’s Magna Carta Day pimms and politics boat trip? Please send cash via Western Union to Smilerman, PO Box 28889384, Abuja. Thanks.


    • 13
      scamorza. says:

      for a big dump, try scarmorza cheese.


      • 23
        David Millicleg says:

        Immigration is good for the economy.
        Immigration lowers our taxes.
        Immigration reduces the crime rate.
        Diversity is our strength.


      • 27
        Borap says:

        scarmorza scarmorza will you do the fandango


  2. 2

    Muted :-( … Vote UKIP :-)


    • 9
      Owen Jones says:

      Is it better to have people voting UKIP than slinging petrol bombs like us lefties do if we don’t get our own way?


  3. 3
    Botus says:

    That was not a funny caption.


    • 6
      Socialism is theft says:

      I didn’t get the joke either.


    • 15
      Jack Ketch says:

      Yes it was.


      • 29
        broderick crawford says:

        Useless choice Guido . Tame and mundane .

        Apart from mine of course there were much better than this.

        Shades of nepotism doing the rounds this holiday Friday afternoon
        are there ?

        Have you been promised a fish and chip lunch followed by Rossi s ice cream and a pint of mild on Southend-on-Mud on Holiday Monday ??

        Goodness you re an easy mark .


      • 30
        Cinna says:

        No it wasn’t.


  4. 4
    BBC 24hr rolling bollocks says:

    Anyone want to buy a pair of deck shoes bought today never been worn?.


  5. 11
    what a gay dave says:

    Eddie mair – you’re giving me a politicians answer

    Phillip hammond – I am a politician


  6. 16
    Jack Ketch says:

    Nice line in the Guardian today re: the elections “I love the smell of toast in the mornings”


  7. 17
    Cop Shop says:

    Nothing to smile about.


  8. 18
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    Can we at least have a top ten list from which the winner was then selected?

    Come on you know you want to…


  9. 19

    Of course they were unfunny.

    Who wants to win a river trip to Traitor’s Gate with a load of LiBLabCons?


  10. 24
    Cato Street Conspirator says:

    My god, the rest must have been bad. (Including mine, which I can’t remember).


  11. 25
    The British media are cunts says:

    Smell my finger, it’s been up my arse all day.


  12. 28
    RomaBobbieBooBoo says:

    F*cking fix!!


  13. 32
    James O'Bottom says:

    Well someone has to win!


  14. 33

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  15. 34
    Ciaran Fail Goggins says:

    I enjoyed bum sex with Jodie McIntyre.


  16. 35
    The only Country in Europe not to have a Parliament is England says:

    Should Ronnie Barker not be in the middle in this sketch


Seen Elsewhere

Comply or Die at Grauniad | MediaGuido
Labour Beats UKIP in South Yorkshire | LabourList
Mock the Week’s Weak Comedy | Nigel Farage
Can Jim Murphy Save Scottish Labour? | Guardian
There is Still Appetite for the Westminster Lunch | Jon Craig
Labour Turn Their Backs on Jewish Community | Dan Hodges
Chivalry is Not Dead | Laura Perrins
Jonathan Jones is a Tw*t | Iain Dale
Second Scotland Poll Suggests Labour Wipeout | Times
Paedo Probe Boss Urged to Quit | Sun
Keynesian Tories Won’t Eliminate Deficit | Tim Montgomerie

Find out more about PLMR

Zac Goldsmith: “The hon. Gentleman might like to know that today’s Guido Fawkes quote of the day is the one on drug laws that we have heard cited by a number of hon. Members.”

Mike Hancock: “I am delighted to hear that Guido Fawkes is talking about something other than me.”

“Digger” Murdoch says:

Is it just me, or is Nigel Farage just a top hat and a monocle away from being a Batman villain?

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