May 20th, 2014

The Guardian Out Guardians Itself


  1. 1
    Fawke Handles says:

    Bloody cheek!

  2. 2
    Brittan of Leon says: … Police are investigating the #Murder of Madeleine #McCann The Times crime correspondent mentions MURDER of Maddie McCann .

  3. 3
    Yvette Copafeel says:

    Bloody twats!

  4. 4
    Purpleline says:

    Bleeding Heart/ Vagina Liberals quick question after the menopause do these women in Taiwan lost their 3 extra days holiday entitlement. Asking for a friend going through a sex change, he will do anything for a few extra days holiday.

  5. 5

    Employer: Where’s Sally?

    Bloke: She’s having a blob day

    Employer: On the Tuesday after a bank holiday Monday?

    Bloke: All the girls in the office are synchronised. There’s nobody in Marketing today

    Employer: Even Doris? She’s 59 for christs sake.

  6. 6
    cupertino says:


  7. 7
    Maimed Codger says:

    Give them 5 years off for the Menopause..

  8. 8
    The Bogging Guardian says:

    Ffs. I would be on my period permantly even though I am 96 years old and male!

  9. 9
    Anonymous says:

    I expect Cameron to introduce this measure immediately on his return from the lazy bastards parliamentary holiday.ill start selling the on blob office calendars immediately.

  10. 10
    john77 says:

    THree days annually for a monthly problem? That sounds like someone trying to *prove* that it is phoney!
    Actually some women do suffer severe pain and some, but not all of those, do take sick leave which may be deduced from the sickness leave data (despite hangovers and smashed thumbs being an overwhelmingly male problem single women had significantly higher sickness absence than men when data was compiled distinguishing between single and married women – married women had far higher sick leave than either).
    So those that *really* need it do, or at least can, get it. Why should those who do *not* need it get an extra 24 or 48 days leave a year? Should those who have period pains at weekends get days off in lieu?

  11. 11
    The Bogging Guardian says:

    There are contraceptive pills that resolve period problems and painkillers. No excuse.

  12. 12
    Fawke Handles says:

    Trickle down twatonomics.

  13. 13
    Anonymous says:

    I think men should be allowed to take a, wan k yourself silly day, at least one day a year.that would only be fair.

  14. 14
    jgm2 says:

    Can men have days off too for the stress of having to live with fucked-up neurotic women who are having a hormonal imbalance?

  15. 15
    Anonymous says:

    Men should get the same amount of time off for putting up with the mardy cows every month

  16. 16
    Jim Halpern says:

    What do the people on the LGBT short bus get? I’d guess something like this:

    L (women who think they’re men): 0 days per year
    G (men who think they’re women): 3 days per year
    B ((wo)men who kinda think they’re men(wo)): 1.5 days per year
    T (men who really, really think they’re women): 12 days per year (gotta love a trier)

  17. 17
    jgm2 says:

    I have a daughter too. Do I get double time off?

  18. 18
    Will says:

    The guardian has been getting worse with its articles over time. No wonder that its sale of autotrader and it reserves of cash are the the only thing that’s keeping it afloat. Whilst it should have enough cash on current burn rates ie losses to keep going for 20 years. I do feel that a tipping point could come where it suffers a permanent loss of ad revenue as users switch to other media.

  19. 19
    spelling counts says:

    Women may be known for “pmt” by men but men have pmt symptoms all the time: rages, fits of violence and aggression. Only they call it “being a man”.

  20. 20
    Lancashire Procurator Fiscal says:

    When women socialise and work together for a considerable time, their periods begin to synchronize.

    Bit tough if coming up to completing a large contract the entire female staff under 48 are off

  21. 21
    Hugh Janus says:

    Obviously low on cash, despite their extensive offshore arrangements.

  22. 22
    Anonymous says:

    The guardian with its sale of autotrader has reserves of £872 million with losses last year of £45 million so even without investing the cash it should be able to continue for 22 years on a straight line burn rate. However if its readers decline rapidly or it goes behind a paywall and only 100,000 are prepared to pay for it, then its advertising rates could drop increasing its losses.

  23. 23
    Penny Red says:

    What, would you rather us bleed all over the office carpet?

    Fucking patriarchy.

  24. 24
    A Rusbridger says:

    I’d like an hour off every time I need a wank.

  25. 25
    generic taxi driver says:

    not a problem … lino floors and competent cleaning staff
    job jobbed

  26. 26
    Jack the Ripper says:

    Will Boris Johnson be promoting menstrual cycles?

  27. 27
    Henry Crun says:

    Absolutely, can us blokes have the week off before the wimmins go on the blob?

  28. 28
    Richard Scudamore says:

    The problem with women is menstrual tension: 2 weeks pre and 2 weeks post.

  29. 29
    Whitestones says:

    Looks like you are having yours today.

  30. 30
    Blind_leading_the_blind says:

    But according to The Guardian all women are on zero hours contracts, so can have as many days off as they want

  31. 31
    royal statistical society says:

    I dont need time off, but being a bloke, it would be nice if employers would have wankbooths installed – videos, comfy chairs and tissues. A man gotta do what a man gotta do.

  32. 32
    royal statistical society says:

    I would, however, like a few days off a year for injuries sustained whilst fighting when drunk. It’s a man thang.

  33. 33
    manmountain says:

    why can’t we all have 365 days off a year and get immigrants to do the work?

  34. 34
    Mussie enrichers says:

    Two things.

    1. Just stitch the bloody thing up

    2. Women shouldn’t even be at work, that is Haram.

  35. 35
    john77 says:

    Nobody said I needed a day off when I dripped blood and the teacher only sent my son out of class when he dripped blood onto the computer keyboard so that it might have damaged the computer.
    Feminists care about the carpet!

  36. 36
    Anonymous says:

    The Guardian s demise is a dead cert.

  37. 37
    Diane Fatbott says:

    I lay an osteridge egg once a month under the full moon.

  38. 38
    King James 1 says:

    The feminazis are on the march! Just wait for tedious Cameron to get behind it!

  39. 39
    call me dave says:

    Will men get time off for PMT (pre-match tension) during the World Cup?

  40. 40

    Remember what is laughable one day soon developes a momentum of its own , who would have thought arsehole monkeys would one day be marrying each other ?

  41. 41
    broderick crawford says:

    So three days PMT eave a year ergo that means Taiwanese women have a period once every four months .

    This goes a long way to explaining ;

    1) the burgeoning population in the East as a whole given the longer opportunity for regular uninterrupted sex sessions .

    2) the greater productivity of that region occasioned by the greater energy expended on working as opposed to menstruating .

    3) The menopause will come roughly 75 petcent later in SE Asisnn women than in the West thus delaying the mebnopause and normalising the custom of grandmotherly ladies seen bringing up ” orphan progeny ” putatively the offspring of a dead relative .

    Western world gone soft a long time ago …

  42. 42
    Arguido says:

    Killing your daughter with an overdose of Calpol and throwing the body into the sea may be manslaughter and obstruction of justice, but it is not murder.

  43. 43
    Halal Pork Pie says:

    An HOUR?

  44. 44
    Ed Moran says:

    @ Arguido

    Man, you are a piece of shit!

  45. 45
  46. 46
    tosspit says:

    Google brian gerrish and the mind bending change agents. Alternatively make a cup of tea and put yer feet up.

  47. 47
    Obi-Wan Farage says:

    …unless they’re working in a harem.

  48. 48
    Pimp my bride says:

    As long as its synchronised with vagina leave, men should be granted a monthly brothel allowance – we all need a jolly good empty once a month, just like the girlies do.

  49. 49
    rinky stingpiece says:

    Women are the only mammal that can bleed all month, and still live.

  50. 50
    rinky stingpiece says:

    Gloryholes would be a bit more exciting – especially if your bosses might be on the other side.

  51. 51
    rinky stingpiece says:

    Sorry, i meant “women-only workplaces”

    (excluding primary schools, supermarkets, letting agencies and recruitment consultancies)

  52. 52
    rinky stingpiece says:

    Especially if the bbc tv tax is phased out – which is looking increasingly likely, due to technology, never mind growing opposition to it.

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