May 15th, 2014

GUY NEWS SPECIAL: Would You Really Vote for the LibDems?

The LibDems yesterday released an attack video highlighting all the loony things UKIP members have said. But the record of Clegg’s own MPs and councillors is nothing to be proud of either. Would you really vote for these people?

Well, would you?


  1. 1
    Captn P says:

    You left Mr. Laws off the list for a reason?


    • 9
      Judge Dredd-ful says:

      I am the laws!


      • 38
        Toxic Labour for Spongers, Parasites, Criminals, Green Nazis, Peedos and other Wasters says:

        There are hundreds missing from this list from Thorpe onwards. You can’t join the LimpDumbs unless you have at least three sexual perversions.

        Liked by 1 person

      • 100
        finest crystal says:

        start giving.


        • 103
          The European Directive of Fanny Freshness. says:

          I think Laws prefers ‘taking’.


        • 104
          i am "drink me" says:

          now pour some milk in a perfectly spherical .
          with a solid base.
          :left hand:lift


          • i am "drink me" says:

            i am condemnation.
            why condemn
            only way out is to give.
            condemnation free is the new era


      • 192
        strange t says:

        strange thh:s
        strange this:
        is the size of my ear ring durectly responsible for/to my hulahoop.


    • 25
      Anonymous says:

      Well I wouldnt vote for them and I wouldnt vote for a party who failed to sack Maria Miller and whos boss (Cameron) hopes she can return to cabinet. But then again he did charge the tax payer for trimming his wisteria even though he is very rich so I suppose they ARE all in it together


      Liked by 3 people

      • 93
        táxpáyér says:

        Not sure what being rich has to do with mis-claiming for non-work related expenses.


      • 112
        thostids says:

        Where are the records of payments to Blair for his “expenses” if his claims for such have been “mislaid”?


        • 129
          One who knows says:

          ‘shredded’ dear – SHREDDED!!!!


          • cartificare says:

            certificate of authenticity: producer authentic. certifier
            nigerian certificates a plenty. hence goodluckjonathan who certifies the certifier care not.
            8 days in singaepore for 299.
            cheap. morning dew is no sweat. just ask the dew


          • anagram time says:

            anklet says: who rang the bell.
            train said: o to the u
            train said: o to the power of u ate my ear
            english say we.l says favourite me.
            french in favouri.
            potpouri is वीवी


          • Axe is a magnificent cunt says:

            Like I did with Barry’s birth certificate, medical records, university transcripts, passport, financial aid application and any other trace of his existence?


          • Nosey Parker says:

            Always wondered about this – claims shredded but payments to from and to bank accounts will still exist – whilst we will never know the detail of the chicanery the actual amounts would still be of interest given the original house in his constituency would have, at least initially, had a smallish mortgage. Probably not the rental potential of Cameroons either.


      • 132
        give £3/month for ummm...Cheers easy... says:

        So while the liblabcon and msm label all of us UKIP supporters racist. ..
        I’ve yet to see them label every LimpDum MPs sex pests perverts and rapists… why ever not the evidence is rather overwhelming!


        • 236
          cartificare says:

          who is a who who wants your ear.
          the corner of a coroner is quietwho asked thecorner to tear the “thebag. bags 4life,ladt “2seconds


      • 206
        strange t says:

        give money to this.
        give money to those who ask.


        • 232
          cartificare says:

          those who saw, it is interesting said “have to pay the price” “either for the burial” or ” should clear the dews” and then they would be rewared by the aatma of those who dare to depart


    • 42
      Anonymous says:

      Paddy Pantsdown,Mark Oaten,Kennedy,Thorpe etc. all associates of the LibDems.


      • 55
        Morgan's Organ says:

        Lets go back to the randy old David Lloyd George, didn’t he set the ‘Liberal’ standards for the party?


    • 50
      Where are Tony Blair's Expenses says:

      Guido you have missed a few

      1. Jeremy Thorpe – Pillow biting
      2. Cyril Smith – Little Boys
      3. Steele recommended Smith for his Knighthood and thinks its ok for Cyril to turn up at Children’s home and beat boys on the bare bottom. It was not ( in the 60s) and has never been acceptable behaviour
      4. Paddy Pants Down
      5. Charles Kennedy – drunk
      6. Mark Oaten – Don’t go there
      7. Lembit Opik – Little Girls
      8. Chris Huhne – Congenital liar and sexual pervert
      9. David Laws – Liar and thief
      10. Lord Reynard – Sexual pervert
      11. Mike Hancock – Sexual pervert
      12. Nick Clegg – Congenital liar, he claimed he hadn’t been told about Smith, Hancock and Reynard
      13. Jo Swinson : The new definition for hypocrisy for all her support for the LibDem women during the Reynard affair
      14. Simon Hughes lied about his sexuality in his initial election campaign to defeat Tatchell
      15. Kingston Councillor Derek Osbourne jailed for 2 year for Child Porn offences
      16. Vince Cable – The new definition for political loyalty
      17. Tim Farron – the LibDems’ Brutus about as trustworthy as a PPI salesman


    • 53
      I'm not a Lib Dem says:

      Do not forget me!


      • 81
        and they wonder why support has collapsed says:

        My local Lib Dem candidate in the Mole Valley Mark Regan recently
        posted pervy sexual tweets looking for swingers and foot fetishists.
        His local branch has described him as ” an ideal candidate”.


        • 111
          A 'comedian' says:

          There is a LibDem candidate standing in Walthamstow about whom there are persistent rumours of homosexual predelictions for young boys. Nothing ever gets in the press, however.


          • Anonymous says:

            Maybe it wont get in the national press but you’ve alerted me to it.My sister lives in Walthamstow and I am about to enlighten her. Thank you no.111.


        • 147
          Anagram time says:

          LibDems = BDSM lie


          • use the same quarter says:

            one helping of salmon (freshpink).
            3. bean salad present. quatered on a quater plate.
            spponed or quatered. second helping a must. fruit bread below cherry.
            cherry toma.
            anyhow berry raisin on side. tomorrow we will told that m&s bags “forlifehave feelings.


      • 285
        Silly old git who thinks that stalling/appearing to contemplate makes him more convincing says:

        Better than the usual ‘in-house’ rabid left plants. The only relief from this turd is that he only gets 1 vote. Thank fuck for democracy.


      • 323
        This is spontaneous, so don't stop me (even though you've not said nowt yet) says:

        I do like a very intellectual older gentleman getting-in on the act of actual debate. He’s not considered UKIP’s debate, he’s just, (with a little left-wing hug and giggles) just tried to personally assassinate Nigel. I would suggest the baldy, middle-aged, contrived cnut tries harder at his next meeting.


    • 90
      táxpáyér says:

      + Is underpants boy a lib-dum?


    • 145
      shahla says:

      bad shah.:shahofI RAN


    • 171
      political party activists says:

      LibDem activists say one thing to a labour leaning voter, a different thing to a tory leaning voter. They are inconsistent.

      The list should include All LibDem Party members who do leg work.


    • 182
      broderick crawford says:

      Yeah we left Laws off cozhe s a minister again . Absolution granted . Slate wiped clean . No penalty points on his record . Statute of limitations applies.

      Kapish now , or do we have to send Vinnie s head round to occuppy the bottom of your bed !


    • 280
      Google blog block says:

      And under the new EU legislation all these Libdem wastrels have the right for their sins to be forgotten


    • 288
      wendy's at wendover d says:

      homeless: crisis: mngr.
      bend over , be dover, dover street at wehndover, wen dover, handwring wren dover. fucking docer street market.
      is when dover a porn star


    • 388
      Anonymous says:

      Wot, no Oaten? You must be shitting me !


  2. 2
    Mike Cancock CBE MP says:

    Not even I would vote for these people!


  3. 3
    Ctesibius says:

    How could you ignore the Rt. Hon Jeremy Thorpe, or Mark Oaten, who paid male prostitutes to defecate on him as a way to come to terms with the loss of his hair?


  4. 4
    Tory Bare! says:

    Most helpful, Fawkes Old Chap…


  5. 5
    Village Idiot says:

    …..I think you have missed a few out?

    Liked by 1 person

  6. 6
    Can you tell who he nonced yet? says:

    Rolf Harris’s youngest alleged victim tells a court the veteran entertainer is a “dirty old man” who assaulted her “out of nowhere”.


    • 82
      Anonymous says:

      Who knew at the BBC?


      • 97
        Blue Peter Goldfish says:

        To be fair, a lot of them have reported it; 40 years afterwards!


        • 152
          still walking into darkness says:

          how involved with the lib dems was Rolf?, if I were the prosecution I’d be following that up


        • 158
          which is it? says:

          Well Clegg claimed he didn’t know about Cyril Smith.

          Plenty of ordinary people not involved in politics or the media
          had their suspicions about Smith.
          Either Clegg is stupid or a liar.


        • 381
          Hippo Critter says:

          Where’s Esther bleating that she knew but despite her late hubby being a Beeb High Flyer was too scared to say anything at the time – please listen to me I’m relevant – I even started Childline to try and atone – look at me pleeeease


  7. 7
    Prime Minister"Money's no object" Cameron says:

    Been a long day. Early finish though, few pints & then off The Westminster Arms with Nick Clegg to torch some plants.


  8. 10
    Admiral Half-Nelson says:

    Mike Hancock’s nomination papers were arranged by a Lib Dem councillor. His agent is a Lib Dem councillor. Hancock’s election literature was printed in Lib Dem offices in Portsmouth. Nick Clegg is just lying when he pretends that Mike Hancock is now “beyond the boundary” of the Lib Dem party. He’s still as much embedded in it as he ever was.


  9. 11
    Sarah Millington says:

    Why is Clegg allowed to say on the BBC ad infinitum: “Leaving the EU will cost British jobs” with no challenge from anyone?

    The only British jobs at risk if we leave are those of the failed domestic politicians & their lackies.

    Liked by 1 person

    • 20
      The Awkward Squad says:

      Old Nick is dreaming of a fat EU Commissioner job, gold plated pension and loadsamoney for doing even less than he does now.

      As for the creepy Pravda-Izvestia State Broadcaster…..they are an unelected mouthpiece for all things socialist and that includes Cleggomaniacs beloved EU.


    • 52
      The BBC says:

      If we don’t get millions from the EU, we’ll have to sack all of the reporters who are paid to shill for them. That will cost British jobs, right?


      • 346
        TV Observer says:

        Not really. If you look closely at your tv screen you will notice that most of them appear to w1gs and wuzzifuzzies from beyond our shores.


    • 106
      Nonentity Clegg says:

      As Nick is prone to say in his MacDonald’s role, I’ll always give you lies with that.


    • 191
      White rabbit says:

      Thought Clegg sounded unhinged today chatting about UKIP with his pal, John Piennar.
      The irrational contortions of abuse including..Racist, bigot, prejudiced, unbalanced etc. etc. Poor Clegg. He’ll never get over that beating of a few weeks back.


      • 317
        The vast majority says:

        We’ve all had enough of the LibDems sanctimonious thinly veiled socialist wining.

        It’s all a bit fcuking rich when they’re polling less than half what UKIP are in the GE.

        Where’s you’re ideological proportional representation voting now Clegg ?


  10. 13
    Nick Clegg says:

    Yes, and I was a Teenage Cactus Arsonist.


    • 21
      Agony Aunt says:

      Why did you do it Nick? What made you so angry? What was it about your schooldays? Is there something you are not telling us about the nasty teachers at your prep school? Did they damage you Nick?


      • 123
        President Cheery B. Mahmood says:

        just asking like, so was that a greenhouse full of phallic looking cacti ?


    • 35
      Chris Huhne says:

      I’m just an arse


  11. 15
    Inbred, redneck savages says:

    Mike Hancock and his son remind me of The Hills Have Eyes.


  12. 16
    Derry Cocksporn (LibDem) says:



  13. 19
    Anonymous says:

    There’s anti-Semite missing from the list and also an attempted murderer. Also weren’t they financed by some con artist for a long while.


    • 45
      Observer says:

      And the porn-film director.


      • 96
        táxpáyér says:

        How embarrassing (for the porn director).

        I wonder could he get a 18 certificate if they showed anything as indecent as your average Lib-Dum MP gets up to?


  14. 22
    Shameful dishonour says:

    Why no mention of dishonourable Pantsdown?


    • 51
      Charlie Kennedy MP says:

      You’ve left ME out too, Mr Fawkes. After all, I DID ignore that no-smoking regulation that time, and technically am also in the category of “lawbreaker.”

      Shome mishtake, surely, omitting me.

      And then again, considering it’s you– glass houses and stones, I suppose…


  15. 26
    Ippikin says:

    Have you forgotten Mark Oaten? After all you broke the story.


  16. 27
    UffusDuffus says:

    Don’t forget this is the party that took £2.4 million of stolen money from Michael Brown. And declined to return the money to Brown’s creditors, when they were told it had been illegally obtained.


    • 30
      Roger"I'm so sexy it hurts" Helmer says:

      Just imagine the furore if it were Nigel Farage who admitted doing this.


  17. 33
    Say what you will says:

    Vote Libcraps or believe in Climate Change , life doesn’t get any more difficult, but the Libcraps would be another party that I would never ever trust, Liebour being the first and no I don’t believe in climate change, weather change YES.


  18. 34
    LibDems Anonymous says:

    My name is Nick and I’m…….a libdem.


  19. 36
    FairBobby says:

    None of them would get across my door; nor would I shake hands with any one of them. They are all deviants of one sort or another best avoided by sensible people


    • 41
      Alexander Fleming says:

      That is very sound advice. I would extend it to everyone in Westminster, just to be on the safe side. There are some contagions medical science has not yet found a cure for.


  20. 40
    Jimmy Savile says:

    To paraphrase Groucho Marx.
    I wouldn’t join a political party which would have me as a member.


    • 54
      głosować UKIP says:


      • 87
        Blue Peter Goldfish says:

        Mr Geobbles, Haaaaaa!, any relation?, to Farage: you are a chicken and cockroach, but have you got anything constructive say?.


        • 274

          Nice to hear the Polish PM say that Nigel is a noisy cockerel on top of a pile of stinking …….
          We’ve cleared his country of drunkards and misfits so a nice big thank you would suffice.


  21. 43
    generic taxi driver says:

    well at least they havent murdered anyone yet like gerry adams is alleged to now have they?


  22. 46
    Party conference song to rally the troops says:

    Libdems of the world unite,
    messing with kids is alright,
    So’s speeding in a car driven late at night,
    So libdems of the world….UNITE


  23. 48
    Anonymous says:

    I live in a Libdem constituency- North Norfolk in fact. Usually there are hundreds of LibDem posters and placards around before any election but up to yet,during this election, I have not seen one. Must admit I’ve seen no Labour(they are non-existent here) nor have I seen any Conservative banners. I have seen several enormous UKIP posters which make me feel really good.
    The LibLabCon cartel need a kick up the backside and I hope UKIP- The People’s Party will do this on May 22nd.


    • 58
      Renoir says:

      The LibDems imploded a couple of yeasr back. The only people who will be dilvering their materials will be paid delivery companies or the candidates and the direct family members and friends of the candidates. The LibDem Party has ceased to be a popular grassroots organisation. In fairness, a similar thing has happened to the Tories and Labour in large parts of the country. The Westminster parties, at a local level, are driving on fumes.


      • 168
        still walking into darkness says:

        Great point, only seeing UKIP posters in the home counties, but in places where I’ve seen them I’ve see about a dozen big posters be replaced by SKY+ adverts, funny that

        Not seen a single Vote Tory poster, and this is their absolute heartland

        I’ve seen a couple of wanky little vote tory banners pop on websites


    • 63
      Tim Yeo-Yo says:

      Has Alan Partridge (north Norfolk Digital) come out in support of Ukip yet?


      • 318
        A nonny mous says:

        Was speaking to a load of farmers today, mostly ex Tory voters, they all said voting UKIP and to hell with Cameron, they won’t be voting for him in the EU elections or the GE, it makes no difference, time for change and Cameron not Man enough for the job.

        Being a London man was quite refreshing to hear their plain speaking.


    • 64
      GE is close says:

      The main three parties and media console themselves that the EU election results are irrelevant because they know the EU parliament itself is irrelevant.(proving UKIP is right)
      I reckon their keeping their powder dry and war chests full waiting for 2015.


  24. 49
    Sounds like Gordon! says:

    He’s seeking re-election in 2015 isn’t he?

    An ex-politician seeking re-election has asked to have links to an article about his behaviour in office removed by Google.


  25. 56
    Gideon George Osborne says:

    In other news.



    • 60
      Ouch says:

      If the Chinese follow suit, it’s game over for the USA.


      • 127
        President Cheery B. Mahmood says:

        On the radio was reported at the opening of the winter olympics that the boss of Russian navy and boss of Chinese navy went off for a talk for an hour.


  26. 59
    DWWolds says:

    And what about Clegg himself? At the launch of the LibDems campaign for the coming elections he accused UKIP of “scaring everybody witless” with “dangerous fantasies”.

    Yet the LibDems’ leaflet pushed through my door is headlined “Millions of BRITISH JOBS” [their caps] are at risk” with a quote from their local candidate that: “100,000 jobs across the regional depend on our being in the EU”.

    But the Professor in charge of the research project on which the LibDems base those figures has said they are a total misrepresentation of the findings. What was actually revealed was that 3 million or so UK jobs depend not on our membership of the EU on our exports to it.

    So just who is “scaring everybody witless” with “dangerous fantasies” Mr Clegg?


    • 65
      Pookie Snackumberger says:

      I’ve had an veritable avalanche of election leaflets through my door this month. One actually had a picture of fart-face Milliband in true Russian Communist poster c1930 pose, with well scrubbed upturned face, trying to look resolute and serious, but only looking like a utter twerp.


      • 91
        Liebour says:

        I got a Labour leaflet. On the front it said “Liebour will deal with the costh of liviing
        cwisith”. Can’t tell you any more that as it went straight into the bin.


        • 185
          Ellie-Mae (9) says:

          They could have at least printed it on Andrex, then that’s two sheets off the cost of living crisis.


          • Pickled Wixard says:

            By using the shiny stuff, I was able to scrape my dogs shit off the road and into the obligatory bag, so I would encourage Ed <illitwat to keep spending the overdraft on quality stuff


    • 352
      Correcting fluid says:

      Most of the things we export are destined for countries other than the EU zone. Just because everything gets trans-shipped at Rotterdam these days does not mean we are sending everything to the EU. Export statistics are among the most unreliable ever produced.


  27. 61
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    A bit busy withadministrative procedures and processes at the moment – the wrong kind that is.


  28. 62

    If you really want to know what the Lib Dems are like and the tactics and lies they are resorting to look at my blog:


  29. 67
    Cactus lover says:

    There’s no way I will vote for Clegg now.


  30. 69
    BBC Mong says:

    Apart from a few dykes missing that looks like a typical BBC workforce. So yes.


  31. 70
    Lib Dumb Voters says:

    ” Well, would you?”



  32. 71
    Pookie Snackumberger says:

    Guido, what about the ‘straight’ choice candidate?


  33. 72


  34. 73
    DerrIn Brown Fool Time w@nker on C4 says:

    ” Well, would you?”.

    Yes I would. Cockey would do well to pretend he is gay. Get him off the hook.


  35. 75
    Just Saying says:

    List should include Clegg, Laws & Alexander.

    Your blog “Friends of Gove…”, posted 2.30 pm today shows why none of those are fit for purpose.

    Readers should click the link in the line towards the end of that blog, where Guido says:
    Cummings version of yesterday’s events is well worth a read.


  36. 77
    Ockham's Razor says:

    You seem to have missed a few:

    Herbert Henry Asquith, a serial groper who would be under investigation by Operation Yewtree were he still alive today. Probably pocketed monies he should not have done.

    David Lloyd George, as Chancellor of the Exchequer, benefited from insider dealings in the Marconi scandal, from which he profited hugely. Found to have acted with grave impropriety. In other words, a thieving c*unt. That is by everyone apart from his Liberal chums. But let’s face it, a Liberal would not know when grave impropriety occurred even if it bit his bollocks off…

    You will never find me singing that he knew my father!

    Rufus Isaacs, Viceroy of India and Foreign Secretary. Another Marconi scandal beneficiary. Evil bastard.

    Herbert Samuel, Postmaster General. Bent as a nine-bob note. Marconi blaggard.

    Alexander Murray, Marconi cheat who was also (wait for it) Treasurer of the Liberal Party. The c*unt was forced to resign and guess what? He was immediately elevated to the Lords! If you ever wonder where it comes from, you need look no further.

    The LibDems are the vilest, most corrupt, nastiest cheats and crooks that ever walked the surface of this planet. Treachery is in their blood. All their firstborn should get the Herod treatment. And their second born. And so on…


    • 153
      Bosun Higgs says:

      Gladstone would go with a prostitute and afterwards whip himself as a penance.

      Lloyd George liked a bit of posh and would shag anything in a tiara.


      • 284
        Ockham's Razor says:

        Gladstone. Fallen Tory. How did I miss him?

        A sophistical rhetorician, inebriated with the exuberance of his own verbosity, and gifted with an egotistical imagination that can at all times command an interminable and inconsistent series of arguments to malign an opponent and to glorify himself.


        He has not a single redeeming defect.

        Both from the incomparable Benjamin Disraeli.



    • 240
      John Bellingham says:

      Don’t forget the Liberal Horatio William Bottomley.


      • 290
        Ockham's Razor says:

        My thanks to you too.

        Horatio Bottomley, swindler, Liberal and one-time MP for Hackney South where only 80% of the electorate turned out to vote for him*. Clearly they had not mastered the postal vote at that time or it would have been at least double this.

        “Corruption” should have been his middle name.

        * I should point out that he had stood as an Independent, as even he had become too corrupt for the Liberal Party. You can say no less than that of any man…


        • 325

          Horatio Bottomley, the Edwardian MP (and notorious swindler), certainly had a quick wit.

          He once arrived at the home of Lord Cholmondeley:

          “Please tell Lord Cholmondeley that Mr Bottomley wishes to see him,” he instructed the butler, pronouncing the name as it’s spelt.
          “Lord Chumley, sir,” replied the butler. “The correct pronunciation is Chumley.”
          “Oh, all right,”said Bottomley, “Tell him that Mr. Bumley would like to see him.”


  37. 78
    Blue Peter Goldfish says:

    Pretty obvious from the polls that virtual nobody is going to vote for the Lib/Dems in the European elections or in the 2015 General Election, but I’ve got that old sinking feeling that horse trading will take place again to secure a re-election (in 2015) for one of the other two in a hung Parliament (and so they should be).


  38. 80
    Mass Debate says:

    YouTube, the Daily Telegraph and the Guardian have announced they are making a joint bid to host a leaders’ debate before next year’s General Election.

    Such a debate, broadcast online, would be free of the rules on balance which broadcasters such as the BBC, ITV and Sky have to follow,

    This would mean there would be more freedom over which leaders took part.


    • 86
      JH462323141245 says:

      Such a debate, broadcast online, would be free of the rules on balance which broadcasters such as the BBC, ITV and Sky have to follow

      What, where the coverage is carefully balanced between the far and centre left?


  39. 83
    Jeremey Sportscar says:

    Len McCluskey will ONLY fund Labour if Miliband does what he says.

    Wow!. Not even hiding it anymore.
    was just on LBC but cant see a link anywhere.


  40. 84
    Loony Watch says:


  41. 85
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Beware of square plates.

    That is all.

    Oh! OK:


  42. 89
    The Great Lord Mandlescum of Boy in the County of Pants says:

    I would!


    • 94
      The Great Lord Mandlescum of Boy in the County of Pants says:

      Sorry forgot to say, I spend so much time in Russia or on luxury yachts or both, I need a postal vote.


  43. 95
    Chris Huhne says:

    I gave my wife a social disease I got from fucking men in the arse and then I left her for a lesbian. I am thus disappointed I didn’t make the list.


  44. 98
    Roger"I'm so sexy it hurts" Helmer says:

    Bulgarians and Romanians are pretending to be Irish, claims Farage


  45. 102
    Soap Dodgers says:


  46. 105
    Ockham's Razor says:

    I want to start a whip-round.

    If we save up about £1,000 between us, we can buy a telephone box.

    After the next election, we can put all the LibDem MPs in it, tether it to a crane and lower it into the Serpentine.

    Better still, into the Thames. Even better, the Arctic Ocean.


  47. 115
    ffranc says:

    Nothing on our hard-working MEPs, I notice.


  48. 126
    Fruitcake and swivel eyed loony loving the panic and utter desperation says:

    Oh dear.

    Vote UKIP, get UKIP.


  49. 128
    Britannia says:

    Only a week to go. Let’s kick them in the ballots.


  50. 130
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Tory donors defect to?


    Sorry Rupe! (Always time to change your mind!)


    • 138
      The Faecal Finger of Fate . . smears says:

      . . and having smeared, moves on
      And draws upon the lavvy wall one
      Word that, brief, short
      Bereft of life – yet its
      Ordure commands attention, – saying


  51. 133
    Gideon George Osborne says:

    Fact 1 26 ONCE BUSTLING American Cities are now BANKRUPT for the first time in U.S. History
    Fact 2 Germany, Switzerland and Denmark are in the process of pulling ALL of their gold OUT of the United States
    Fact 3 Warren Buffet, John Paulson and numerous other billionaires are now dumping U.S. stocks as fast as they can sell them
    Fact 4 Russia, China and Brazil are moving quickly towards creating a new central bank with one purpose: to REPLACE the U.S. dollar…


  52. 136
    MSM EU Election Campaign Top Story for Tomorrow says:

    UKIP Councillor’s Cat Scratched an Immigrant’s Dog (in 1995)


  53. 137
    Vote for Nick says:


  54. 140
    Henry V says:

    If neither Tory or Labour get a majority they will be in power again come 2015. If voter apathy continues on its current trend the Lib Dums will always be in power as the junior partner of a coalition. Not bad for a party whose active membership is equal to about 1 in 1500 of the population. Not that is a minority.


  55. 141
    Libidinous Demagogues says:

    Twink Oaten? Paddy Pantsdown, Charlie “hic” Kennedy, the list goes on…

    Will the LibDems be telling us that UKIP are the party of freaks and weirdos?


  56. 142
    Howdy do dere honey says:

    It’s looking like “Black Friday” tomorrow in the city.

    Dow Jones 16401.76
    -212.21 -1.28%


    • 173
      I says:

      We were due for a correction.


      • 180
        Howdy do dere honey says:

        No, you are a pro-Islamist Stalinist.


        • 190
          I says:

          The stock market has risen for months but productivity, efficiency, profits and dividends haven’t justfied that rise. I appreciate that what with QE and low interest rates there is a lot of cash about but shares really are over-priced.


  57. 143
    Mark Oaten says:

    What else do I have to do to get on the list?


  58. 146
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Yay! Excellent argument from Dave (if you turn it on it’s head.)

    Hey! Stinking smelly Scotch! Are you sober enough to listen?

    Well fuck you you homosexual c*nts! You fried Mars Bars eaters. You haggis bashing wallies!

    Dave has said “Don’t vote yes to get rid of the Tories.”

    I say “Vote yes to get rid of the Tories! For ever! Dae ye ken?”

    That Alex Salmond! He is fucking mustard, mate! The dog’s bollocks! Your money’s safe with him. Go for it! You may never get another chance!


    • 156

      Pleaser vote YES you scrounging neds we are only to anxious to get shot of you it will save you millions you can all become rich overnight IT’S SCOTLANDS OIL


      • 163
        Al Capone's Psittacoidea says:

        ((((((((((((((Until the Shetlands declare UDI!))))))))))))))



    • 220
      C O (Ξ7s1) says:

      I need to catch up – am not ignoring your question about liberal arts college’s either from yesterday :-)


  59. 148
    Anonymous says:


    • 160
      Anonymous says:

      But we English don’t want this.


    • 183
      UKIP4ME says:

      This is a classic islamist tactic, they bully their way into government demanding special treatment which they then use exclusively to further their own agenda and benefit their own people. Classic hostile colonist tactics used again and again wherever these hostile colonists cast their eyes, once in position of power they then demand ever more privilege and power until they have the whip hand and then God help the non believer.


    • 197
      ciconia says:

      yeah yeah,
      but as a parish councillor for many years I despise the libdems because of their constant claiming credit for every bit of good anyone in the community does.
      And,…. they can’t even be bothered to perforate their election flyers!


    • 244
      Jack Ketch says:

      What about the graveyards?


  60. 155
    The European Directive of Fanny Freshness. says:

    Peter Brock.
    Poppy Cock!


  61. 161
    Big Norm says:

    Never mind all that rubbish. Today’s Guardian reveals that Hunter Biden, the son of the VP of the USA, has business interests in the Ukraine energy industry. Anybody smell a rat?


    • 175
      Heroic freedom fighter ...cough says:

      Any leftards screaming its all about gas, like they took to the streets about Iraq and oil about?


    • 309
      Anonymous says:

      That is old, old news.

      Keep up (you obviously rely on Guardian or Guido).

      Follow Drudge, at least as a start. Then build up a wider readership, to keep up.


  62. 162
    Anonymous says:

    This the equality you want Sadiq Khan ??

    A Sudanese court has sentenced a heavily pregnant woman to death after she left Islam and married a Christian man.

    The religion of peace, dont you just love it.


    • 179
      UKIP4ME says:

      And the UK handing over millions in foreign aid into the bargain, it makes you want to sentence our rulers to death. And not a squeak of protest from our so called foreign secretary busy supporting other islamists in Syria murdering their way through Christians.


      • 184
        The Tower of London says:

        William Hague should be hanged, drawn and quartered.


        • 342
          a salami ham and bacon says:

          Islam should be (milked, curdled, turned into a cheese, then) hanged drawn and quartered, (and served on) crackers.


        • 362
          Correcting fluid says:

          …William Hague should be hanged, drawn and quartered….

          … but not necessarily in that order…


    • 344
      a salami ham and bacon says:

      she wasn’t islimey, she was raised an ethiopian orthodox christian by her mother, because her allegedly mucuslim father was out defiling the goats.


    • 390
      Ramjamdangalangadingdong says:

      Religion of SUBMISSION – get it right in future


    • 391
      Ramjamdangalangadingdong says:

      Interesting to note this is a MUSLIM court in a MUSLIM country – nothing to do with a few extreme “islamists” but state sanctioned and a true insight into the nature of the religion of submission. See also Monotheist Saudi, etc etc – not “islamist” just muslims with or without taquiyya


  63. 169
    non taxable pikey says:

    Yeah, let’s have Sharia Law in the UK.

    Better still, let’s kick out the Sudanese Embassy and every Sudanese Moslem in the UK.

    Fucking Animals!


  64. 172
    Anonymous says:

    Can someone explain why the EU has given Google so much power?

    They have now told everyone with a secret to hide, to tell Google the details.

    So now Google will hold the largest database of blackmail material in the world.

    No one is safe with Google, they are a corrupt organization. It is the governments that should be controlling them.


    • 176
      non taxable pikey says:



    • 211
      darwin says:

      To be fair, the kids at Google are way smarter than even your above average politician. Go figure.


    • 392
      Short Sighted Noob-Typing With Me Nose says:

      If you’ve got nothing to hide then you’ve got nothing to fear….

      On an afterthought, just who polices the police?

      Just another unaccountable Globalist Yank construct. Google it! You may find it informative….



  65. 174
    Prime Minister David Cameron says:

    Today I’m going to Scotland. Or as we call it, Fracking Zone 1.


    • 216
      táxpáyér says:

      If it is, then New Darien might be solvent a while longer than expected.


    • 349
      a salami ham and bacon says:

      Independence for Zetland!

      …just when you thought you were running out of tax havens – if I was running or funding the “better together campaign”, agitating for Shetland independence from Scotland would be sensible, simply because you could use every single SNP argument against their attempts to fight it.

      Fuck it… why not independence for the Republic of Aberdeen?!

      It’s the wisest strategy… turn it from a in-out of the union question to a union v balkanisation question.

      is anyone listening? ;-p


      • 393
        Scottish Cheese Maker-having it all his own whey says:

        Yeah, because there’s a line to be drawn when it comes to Democratic Accountability. I just wish I’d brought my ruler and not this ‘Free Hand’ crayon!


  66. 181
    More Orwellian Lies says:

    Brtiain-hating lying arsonist Dutchman lectures public on patriotism in bid to betray us all to his pension provider


    • 194
      The European Directive of Fanny Freshness. says:

      Clegg wouldn’t know what patriotism was if it ran up his leg and bit him on his lady-balls.


    • 203
      F'ing ready for it..... says:

      One day we’ll have the chance to really put the foot on the throat of these deceptive cultural Marxists, and their pro mooslim anti white, anti male, anti British views.

      Out of chaos comes order.


    • 353
      a salami ham and bacon says:

      he’s a lie-o-sexual


  67. 195
  68. 199
  69. 201
    Mark Oaten says:

    This is a load of shit.


  70. 204
    Toxic Tories for Landowning Spongers, Parasites, Criminals, Expenses Fraudsters, Traitors, Peedos, & says:

    So the bastards can find £30 million to send to Syria, but here at home the country’s skint so people have to endure the Bedroom Tax (except in Scotland).


    • 221
      UK emigration services, Eastern Europe, South Asia section says:

      Personally waiting months for an eye hospital appointment, going way over the due time, but it’s the not the cuts or overpopulation, still it was nice to have vision for a time.

      Any dosh sent to tur’key yet? The fuckas are rioting I see, in the Sud’an a pregnant woman awaits the death sentence being carried out for marrying a non mooz but not till the kid is two so that was kind of the judge, ffilthy food shops of the mooz take away variety rat ridden shitholes with nice inspectors who shoud SHUT the fucks down for ever.


      • 331
        Austin Tash says:

        Islam is a religion of peace. This is why the judge gave her chance to renounce her Christian faith.


      • 367
        Expat info services ltd says:

        You want a specialist to look at your eyes? Take a cheapie fare to Malaysia where in any private hospital you can see such in less than 36 hours. Appointment costs roughly a fiver for an examination and a bit more for any treatment.

        Can’t understand why you lot risk your sight (and lives) for the sake of a few quid on an air fare.


    • 222
      The Guardian says:

      “We must help the disabled people facing imprisonment at home
      The government is scrapping the independent living fund even though its own research shows the terrible impact it will have”


  71. 208
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    here’s one from sortof earlierish

    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:
    May 15, 2014 at 7:27 pm
    i refer to the strapline of this blog and irony
    Are there numerous politicals and business types and legals – ignoring (the Fireworks issue) bi-lateral treaties / agreements which coupled with employee rights do in fact protect employees on both side of the pond?
    It seems as if the area / arena of bi-lateral treaties / agreements is being ‘not looked at’ for some strange reason
    And of course there is that other cancerous issue of them Zero / annualised hours thingies.
    Like this


  72. 214
    UK emigration services, Eastern Europe, South Asia section says:

    Have spent an enjoyable day in Southport, not sat outside there for a few months. Interesting volume of Roma wandering about, no sign of anyone working unless it was the clothes rails in the cheap shops.

    Ugliest people imaginable, easy to spot.


  73. 223
    Ockham's Razor says:



    Fat C*unt.


  74. 226
    Question Time says:

    Paddy Pantsdown, Caroline Flint and Esther McVey on tonight’s Question Time.


  75. 227
    Anonymous says:


  76. 233
    Quod erat Vulpit Jupiter et in Arcadia Ego says:

    The Labour Party is the PEDO PARTY

    My alter ego has been banned from the Telegraph Website for exposing the scumbots governing the UK


  77. 242
    UK emigration services, Eastern Europe, South Asia section says:

    Ukip candidate lambasts Islam as ‘totalitarian ideology’
    Email emerges in which Brent Ukip candidate Heino Vockrodt says Islam is against everything modern Britain stands for. Guardian.

    Twats refused planning consent go ahead anyway. Recreating Hel mand in Bre nt. No enforcement as would be seen as racisst. Tough. Explain that to people forced to demolish houses due to some minor infringement.

    Fuckin Afghanns can go all go back no can’t they?


    • 247
      Jack Ketch says:

      The BBC/Sky/Ch4/ITN/ Press cabal will publicise the statement, but not the background, just as they have quoted selectively in other cases.


    • 305
      Mr Logic says:

      a) Is Islam an ideology? Yes
      b) Is it totalitarian? Yes


  78. 248
    BBC red bottom says:

    Question Time coming up everyone!

    go on twitter at #BBCQT and say you hate Racist UKIP.
    And might as well say you hate racist SNP as well.

    Everyone we don’t like is a racist.


    • 259 says:

      Cheers, busy week, forgot it was Thursday.
      Who’s on the last Question Time before deciding if Socialist EU or Socialist Con/Lab/libs control our lives ?


      • 263
        nice cup of tea says:

        Don’t think I’ll bother thanks.
        I watched for over 20 years but nowadays
        I know exactly what will happen without
        wasting my time.


        • 358
          a salami ham and bacon says:

          With any luck, Labour’s wrecking of the economy, will be followed by the wrecking of their own finances… oh wait… they’re £12,000,000 in the red!


    • 261
      Thrill Seeker says:

      Ripping Yarn on BBC4


  79. 251
    UK love Ab Dull says:

    Please kindly to Ab Dull, he no very brite but good post vote manager. He no want Old Bill scurrying around blacky boxes. Ab Dull can say blackly, no whitey persons as we call yu raccccccccciiiiiiissssssssstttttttttttttt.


  80. 254
    Londoner says:

    A candidate named None of the Above, (formally known as Adam Osen) is standing in Chingford Green. As his surname is listed as ‘Above’, he appears at the top of the ballot paper. He is predicting a ‘significant shift in the political landscape’.


  81. 255
    Anonymous says:

    David Cameron – Nick Clegg = 0

    Ed Miliband x David Cameron = David Miliband

    Alex Salmond³ – Scotland = Nigel Farage

    Tuition Fees + (Nick Clegg x Pledge) = Tuition Fees²

    Nick Clegg + Pledge = Pledge x 0

    √ Nigel Farage = Enoch Powell

    Tory Party ÷ Europe = Ed Miliband + Nr 10

    Nigel Farage – Public School = Nick Griffin

    Lib Dems – Nick Clegg ≥ Lib Dems + Nick Clegg

    Nigel Farage – EU = 0

    IDS ± Frog = Cock³

    NHS x (David Cameron + Nick Clegg) = NHS x 0

    Bankers + (Bonus³) = Recession³

    Boris – Hair = Ken + (London Mayor x 2)

    Chris Grayling = C*nt x ∞


  82. 256
    Tristram's Tribe says:

    Earn good money working from home!

    Cash in hand, so you can still claim your bennies and make a little extra on the side.
    Just call us at Labour HQ now and we’ll drop 5,000 postal votes to your spare bedroom. All you need do is sign, stuff into the envelopes provided , and wait for our courier to collect.
    They are all pre crossed for labour, so its a simple as a lick and stick!

    And we’ll give you a £100.

    So text now to

    {no kippers}


  83. 260
    And In Other News: says:

    Not lovin’ it: Fast food workers bite back with worldwide May 15 strike

    “The global day of protest comes on the same day McDonald’s employees in California, Michigan, and New York filed class-action lawsuits against the hamburger chain – which serves an estimated 68 million customers daily in 119 countries – alleging the company is making employees work off the clock, refusing to pay overtime and even charging employees to have their uniforms cleaned”. RT


  84. 262
    Ex-MP asks Google for 'right to be forgotten' says:

    A British former MP seeking re-election is among more than 1,000 people who have asked Google to remove links to unfavourable online stories about them in the wake of a European Court ruling just three days ago, the Telegraph can reveal.


    • 265
      but says:

      Surely someone clever could find a way to circumvent this?


    • 268
      Gary Glitter says:


    • 271
      The EEC says:

      The common Market seems to be getting too big for its boots and forgetting that it is supposed to be just a free trade zone.


    • 272
      jgm2 says:

      I told you Gordon Brown would still seek re-election.

      65K a year plus free parking at Heathrow (and all UK airports) is well worth two or three visits to London a year.


      • 276
        String Vest says:

        I wonder how many MP’s declare that perk (free parking at airports).
        A few years ago I checked the online submission of interests of MEP’s who were getting that perk at the time (don’t know if they still get it now, but they did then) and only a little over half were declaring it at the time.


    • 273
      jgm2 says:

      Simplest way to circumvent it will be to search from rather than or

      Or search from Yahoo or……


    • 278
      Joan Ryan says:

      Is it ME, Joan Ryan?


  85. 264
    LibDamn says:

    You’re leaving out all of these Labour losers:- Tessa Jowell, Peter Hain, Eric Joyce, Stephen Byers, Patricia Hewitt, Geoff Hoon, Richard Caborn, Adam Ingram, Margaret Moran, the Labour25 list of convicted perverts…
    A blinkered view of politics!


  86. 267
    Blue Peter Goldfish says:

    Adolf Hitler
    Pol Pot
    Joseph Stalin
    Vlad Dracula,


  87. 277
    Ed Twelvety Balls says:

    You ain’t seen me, right?


  88. 287
  89. 296
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    To whom it may concern – EYBW – doesn’t do twatter or facelessbook – never has never will.


  90. 300
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    The LibLabConGreen traitors are cowering like shivering slavering dogs in their establishment bunker, just like Hitler in 1945, as the might of the peoples purple army storms to victory :-)

    All together now:

    Purple is the colour
    Sovereignty is the aim
    We are the greatest
    UKIP is our name


  91. 302
    Bloomers in rain-soaked Bongo Bongo Land says:


    • 307
      Mr Logic says:

      Is the msm in anti-UKIP overdrive? Yes

      Will UKIP cream the msm political parties? Yes


      • 324
        B. Honest-Ffolkes says:

        Well not just the MSM, is it? It’s all sections of our political elite: MSM, political elite and entertainers.

        For clarification I am not a member of UKIP and dislike most of their policies.

        However I am appalled at the attempt of the political elite to stifle real political debate.

        A classic example was Daily Politics interviewing a [fill in the totalitarian description of your choice] representative of Britain First – clearly only so they could then associate UKIP with such racist and extremist opinion.


        • 397
          Dumbo UKIPPER, chillin' out, having a Bud says:

          No one has any policies during these Euro Elections. If you think they do then please put them front and centre. I’m all ears…


  92. 306
    Vince Cable says:

    Everyone has the right to forget.


  93. 310
    Alice says:

    Just as Nigel starts speaking on This Week the BBC transmission fails only to be restored just after he finishes. Too much of a coincidence? More dirty BBC anti-UKIP tricks?


    • 316
      cheche says:

      They used to play this trick on Michael Howard


    • 373
      Say what you will says:

      It was noticed and vile thoughts were thought , but then it’s the bBBC with too many staff and fingers, always remember when Newsnight conveniently got some polling figures the wrong way round, between Liebour and Comorons Conservatives.


  94. 311
    The Public says:

    The Guardian carries on with the msm’s same old same old

    Only a week more of this shit and they will wake up wondering what they are going to do to win back the public’s trust.


    • 312
      Tachybaptus says:

      If the Guardian woke up, it would cease to exist.


    • 333
      nell says:

      “win back the public’s trust” ??? Too difficult a problem for them to address – militwit is still trying to work out what a policy is. cleggie is spending most of his time working out how much he will trough when they make him a commissioner in the eu post 2015 and cameron is coasting as he plays games on his ipod4 or whatever it is.



      • 398
        Guardian Oxbrige Buffoon-relying on cardigans and dusty old books says:

        I’m deep in thought. It’s a bit existentialist, but I’ll warp it to toe the Party Line soon enough…

        PS. Can I shout Racist now? Or is that later on?…Keep me ‘in the loop’. (preferably a hangman’s noose)


  95. 327
    non taxable pikey says:

    Going by the overnight news from Brazil it’s time to dust off the plans for the London 2016 Olmpics.


  96. 332
    nell says:



  97. 334
    Iain Duncan Smith says:

    Good Morning Campers

    People who hate hand gestures ! I salute you !


  98. 335
    Nigel Farage says:

    You ain’t seen me, right?


    • 337
      Roger"I'm so sexy it hurts" Helmer says:

      What a virtuous and upstanding young man. We need more like him.


  99. 336
    Grant"The Cheeky Chappie" Shapps says:

    A message from the Tory Party.. Work Shy, Scroungers, Lay Abouts, you have priced yourselves out of a job, and have only yourselves to blame.


  100. 338
    albacore says:

    So, who gives a rat’s arse about LibDem perverts?
    Labour and Tories do the carnage where it hurts
    And they ain’t arf buggered up our democracy
    With malice aforethought, as bare-faced as could be


    • 340
      Melissa Forthe-Orte says:

      You couldn’t make me up. :)


      • 350
        albacore says:

        Well, if you feel the need to improve your complexion
        With the greatest of speed, do break any connexion
        With the LibLabCons – and register that rejection
        By dumping the whole shebang, come next week’s election


  101. 339
    Owen Jones,Guest Moderator says:

    This web page has a redirect loop.

    Not a lot of people know that.


  102. 343
    Slink away says:

    QT guests….if you are checking for comment on your appearance last night, don’t be too disappointed. No one watches unless its Farage or Starkey….the rest of you are all useless lying scum, and we go to bed instead.


    • 379
      Say what you will says:

      Didn’t watch it, poor cast, no drama, no fights, same audience just from different shelves at the BBC storerooms, it’s sparkle over the years has turned into rust and is just a place to piss on after a boozy session at a mates house .


    • 399
      I bought some tablets on the Internet and they're just kicking-in says:

      I was ‘UP’ all last night, this Canadian Pharmacy certainly knows what it’s doing..


  103. 345
    Calamity Clegg, Chief Cockroach says:

    HI TIM !!


    • 404
      a salami ham and bacon says:


      dirty bummers



  104. 351
    Major Cockstand says:

    Where do I sign up with Cleggy’s mob they seem just right for me.


  105. 354
    Major Cockstand says:

    Mark Oaten….he’s a pile of shit literally.


  106. 355
    Major Cockstand says:

    Last night’s QT was one of the worst ever………they should get rid of look at me I’m pretty…..pretty fucking useless Mcvey now .


    • 366
      Say what you will says:

      I think she won’t get back in again, she’s not liked, will never vote for Camorons Conservatives again and her, I will in 2015, go and deliver UKIP brochures around Wirral if it helps to get her out, Camoron was used to get Brown out,time for her and Camoron to go.


  107. 356
    Peter Tapsell says:

    Lolly Pop ladies.

    They make me cross.


  108. 360
    disenfranchised says:

    Doubtful promise for a UK referendum that might be worded in such a way to pour water on any anti European hopes for needed concrete changes.

    An attempt now to buy Scottish support to maintain the status quo of the UK preventing it splitting up, to compound the confidence trick being attempted above.
    Dave is permanently in denial as to the realities of life.
    As are Clegg and Miliband.

    You are being governed by quislings, supported by the media.

    May I offer my condolances to the UK electorate.


    • 369
      Say what you will says:

      Leave him alone, he has gone to Scotland to help the YES vote, his helpers haven’t got a clue sending him into the lions den.


    • 372
      Nick Clegg says:

      To remain in Europe is the patriotic thing to do!


  109. 361
    David Minibanana says:



    • 403
      a salami ham and bacon says:





  110. 370
    Number 10 Knobcheese says:

    Promises, promises – I love promises. This politics stuff is easy. Just talk an absolute load of bollocks and then instantly forget about it. It’s called PR and I learnt it at Oxford. Vote Dave.


  111. 371
    Banana Republic Split says:

    Is Sir John Chilcot still alive?


    • 376
      Say what you will says:

      He may be, but his report has certainly been lost in the Palace of Westminster dream factory.


      • 382
        Casual Observer 2 says:

        Warmongering lying politicians like Bliar and Camercnut and Senior Officers walk free.

        Squaddies who are trained to kill and overstep the rules during the dirty business of war get prosecuted.



  112. 374
    George Galloway says:

    Remember the periods between sunrise and sunset? Those were the days.


  113. 377
    A p@aedophile says:

    I’m seriously considering voting LibDem next week!


    • 384
      Casual Observer 2 says:


      Dave will fulfill your every desire all on his own. Bumsex, loads of immigrants and a fucking great Deficit.

      The t(u)rd is the perfect LibConner


    • 385
      A p@aedophile says:

      PS… Request to Google – please wipe may slate clean (so to speak).



  114. 380
    Nigel Farage says:

    I am vulnerable.. please check your privilege before commenting anything even remotely negative to me. Thank you.


  115. 383
    Oink oink says:

    The party of Sarah Teather – who knew seals could walk and almost talk


  116. 407
    Brokerman says:

    BrokermanDaniel ‏@BrokermanDaniel
    Kate Middleton Naked Photographs. Future Queen of England. Hits for Tits!


Seen Elsewhere

What Did Britain Really Look Like in 1930s? | CapX
Who Is Steering Labour’s Strategy? | Ballot Box
Greens are UKIP for Young People | Telegraph
Short-Termism of CCHQ | ConHome
May Aide: CCHQ Are Being Misleading | Telegraph
Tories Planning For Second Election | Guardian
We Are Losing Cyber War | Fraser Nelson
Osborne Aide Lands Pay Rise | Mirror
The Sick Of It | Sun
UKIP MEP’s Welfare Hypocrisy | Channel 4
Rise of Angela Merkel | New Yorker

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