May 9th, 2014

Friday Caption Contest (Cameron Solo Barn Dance Edition)


214 Comments

  1. 1
    Dave says:

    Look at me I’m a wanker!

    Like

    • 15
      F##k the LibLabCon says:

      + 9999999999.E

      Like

    • 62
      Anonymous says:

      “I’ll do it MY Way”

      Like

      • 75
        Anon & Voting for UKIP ORG says:

        History will be repeated with “Tyburn Jig”

        And coming very soon…….!!!!

        Like

        • 187
          broderick crawford says:

          SIMON COWELL SAYS .

          I have to say never can I remember seeing an audition which promised to explain so much and said nothing at all . I ‘ m afraid we won’ t be asking you back for the preliminary heats David .

          ( oh look now please DON ‘T cry you ll ruin the mocassas — security ! )

          Like

      • 199
        Dave the destroyer says:

        I’ll do it the EU way.

        Like

    • 110
      táxpáyér says:

      I’m gonna do a move called the Dozey Dave. I’ve been practising my entire life.

      Like

    • 183
      broderick crawford says:

      I know we are all related here in the Cotswolds so hows a bit of incestuous “honky” panky to end with — can I say that ?!

      Like

    • 184
      Downing St. Dunce does Buddy says:

      An Eu referendum?

      Well, that’ll be the day
      uh-huh
      that’ll be the day

      Like

    • 193
      broderick crawford says:

      The new Fred Astaire I ain’t

      Like

      • 194
        broderick crawford says:

        ….. on reflection dancing s more Clegg s speciality married as he is to a fiery Latin tango dancer and having perfected his moves previously with allegedly thirty “pole climbing ” specialists .

        Like

    • 205
      Cynic says:

      Like

  2. 2
    Dribbling Lemocrat says:

    Is there an upturned hat with coins in it just out of the picture?

    Like

    • 47
      Prod says:

      That’s not a hat – it’s a pisspot – and they ain’t coins !

      Like

    • 67
      The Growler says:

      Dave-song and danceman extrodinaire, “Right you lot joy good placards what what, but you have to dance the dance and sing the song, it’s just that extra oomph which will get me back in No10. Now altogether the words of the Eton Boating Song, and just move like me!

      Like

  3. 3
    Observant says:

    Cast iron Dave does tin man impersonation.

    Like

    • 150
      Fishy says:

      ‘…and the thing is, Nigel and all of these UKIPpers keep lying about the ‘Cast Iron Guarantee’….and he claims he’s not like the rest’

      Like

    • 152
      Bruce and Sheila from Waggawagga says:

      No, it’s an Al Jolson impression. Altogether now:

      Mammy maaammy, I’d walk a million miles for one of your smiles my maaaaaammy.

      That’s all folks – oh and you ain’t seen nothing yet!

      Like

  4. 4
    F##k the LibLabCon says:

    …and that kids is how you do the snake oil shuffle.

    Like

    • 134
      Ockham's Razor says:

      Thought it was the Gay Gordons.

      Like

      • 139
        Stuffy ex Regimental dancer says:

        There was a fine Scottish regiment called the Cameron Highlanders who had a dance of their own: amalgamated in 1962 some 52 years before a Cameron would go on to lose Scotland!! Ironic

        Like

        • 166
          Ockham's Razor says:

          Quite right. The “Queen’s Own” now takes on an entirely different connotation, alas. Especially from a Tory perspective.

          Like

        • 189
          Fumbles says:

          Coincidental?

          Like

        • 206
          Kenneth McKellar says:

          There’s many a man of the Cameron clan.
          That has follow’d his chief to the field;
          He has sworn to support him, or die by his side.
          For a Cameron never can yield.

          Like

      • 200
        Gordon the invisble man says:

        I’m working full time for the UN now.

        Like

  5. 5
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Someone remind me please…do the Buffalo girls go round the outside or the inside?

    Like

    • 88
      Maltesers says:

      two trailer park girls go ’round the outside, ’round the outside, ’round the outside

      Like

  6. 6
    Wake up & vote UKIP says:

    Oooh look it’s Fred Astray.

    Like

  7. 7
    M J K Smith says:

    Skull cracker taught me this routine when he does armed robbery.

    Rather good,don’t you think ?

    Like

  8. 8
    Still, it could be worse says:

    I know there is a shortage of midwives but

    Like

  9. 9
    Bill Quango MP says:

    You put your right arm in .. and..we take your right leg as well…that’s excessive state taxation for you.

    Like

  10. 10
    Genghiz the kahn says:

    Dave proves he’s a can’t.

    Like

  11. 11
    British Bulldog says:

    You put your right leg in,
    You give Miliband a kickin;
    You put your right leg in,
    And you do some renegotiatin’
    You do the hokey pokey,
    And you turn yourself around.
    That’s what it’s all about!

    Like

  12. 12
    Neo-Guido says:

    Dave’s always liked line dancing

    Like

  13. 13

    Fred Auster ity

    Like

  14. 14
    Steve Miliband says:

    Fuck this, I’m off for a Nando’s

    Like

  15. 16
    .243 WIN says:

    It’s just a jump to the left….

    Like

  16. 17
    I've never met an intelligent Welshman says:

    What a twerk!

    Like

  17. 18
    Anonymong says:

    The first rule of ‘Shite Club’ is you do not talk about UKIP.

    The second rule of ‘Shite Club’ is you DO NOT TALK ABOUT UKIP.

    Like

  18. 19
    Notorious LIG says:

    …and if Boris tells you his is this big he’s lying.

    Like

  19. 21
    Genghiz the kahn says:

    Dave the Builder,
    Can we fix it,
    Dave the Builder,
    Can we fix it,
    No you can’t.

    Like

  20. 22
    Sir Mix A Lot says:

    A member of the crowd asked the PM how large Diane Abbott’s arse was

    Like

  21. 23
    Steve Miliband says:

    New Strictly compere revealed

    Like

  22. 24
    F##k the LibLabCon says:

    Dave leads CCHQ in doing the Harlem shake.

    Like

  23. 26
    George Street (Mr) says:

    Hang on. . . I think it goes like this . . . ‘The Queen is dead boys, and it’s so lonely on a limb’. . . oo er! Perhaps not . . . er . . . ‘Punctured bycicle on a hillside, desolate . . . ‘ No? What about . . . ‘Hand in glove, the sun shines out of our behinds’? Oh, fuck it. ‘Tomorrow belongs to me’ it is then.

    Like

    • 29
      Bill Quango MP says:

      I said ..Ooops..yes..Oppss..That’s what i said..ooopps…upside your head..I said, once more, ooopps upside..your … head…

      Like

  24. 27
    YouKipper says:

    No Dave you can’t have a placard. If everyone one has one, this whole bussed-in sham really will look fake.

    Like

    • 116
      táxpáyér says:

      Imagine how messy the windows will be after these lot finish with the bus.

      Like

  25. 28
    George Street (Mr) says:

    If you want this giant custard creme behind me you’re going to have to fight for it, bitches.

    Like

  26. 30
    The Good Old Days... says:

    “Bring me Sunshine, in your smile
    Bring me Laughter, all the while…”

    Like

  27. 31
    Bill Quango MP says:

    “Anyone here from Liverpool?”

    Like

  28. 32
    Steve Miliband says:

    Roll up, roll up!

    60? 60 would a crime. I’m not even asking for 50. 45, don’t make me laugh. 40, did I hear 40? Lovely jubbly! All I want for a majority is 38%

    Like

    • 53
      Is it raining where you are? says:

      Made me laugh.
      (Tried to think of Del boy/Dave street trader ..what a plonker gag but gave up.)

      Like

  29. 33
    Anonymous says:

    Cameron…the Farewell Tour begins!

    Like

  30. 34
    Simon Cowell says:

    Get off! This is Britain’s got talent.

    Like

  31. 36
    George Street (Mr) says:

    And, for my final act . . . I’m gonna reincarnate Denis Thatcher someway over my right shoulder . . . . TA DA! I thank yew!

    Like

  32. 37
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Real change we will deliver … though not with a privatised and foreign owned Royal Mail..obviously..

    Like

  33. 38
    noncewatch says:

    “And this is how Max Clifford exercises in prison…”

    Like

  34. 39
    Kit says:

    Dave scores 4 Can’ts and 2 Won’ts in todays ‘Can’t Lead Won’t Lead’.

    Like

  35. 40

    Don’t break my heart, my achey-breaky heart…

    Like

  36. 41
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Come on! Don’t be shy!
    Throw your car keys into the ring

    Like

  37. 42

    Let’s do the time-warp again

    Like

  38. 43
    George Street (Mr) says:

    Tory party staffers robbed of all personal belongings at contrived photo-shoot. Police wish to interview fat bird with short hair and blue scarf.

    Like

  39. 44
    George Street (Mr) says:

    Come on! You know the words . . . ‘ . . .and now, the end is near’.

    Like

  40. 45
    Dave Grunshaw says:

    Britain’s Got Talent

    Like

  41. 46
    Horror! says:

    Cameron… trapped by the advancing political un-dead.

    Like

  42. 49
    2 Eds are better than....er? says:

    UKIP What?……..Oh!….it’s an “A”…..phew!

    Like

  43. 50
    George Street (Mr) says:

    And then, when I’ve clasped him firmly around the ears, I says to him, I says . . . go on Nick, my son, get noshing . . . ‘er, give over!

    Like

    • 55
      Nobby says:

      da da da da da, da dat da da da

      “Start spreading the news,
      I’m leaving today…..”

      Like

  44. 51
    haddock says:

    Cockney UKIppers with purple cards describe Cameron.

    Like

  45. 52
    Barry Gibb says:

    “…..Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk
    I’m Nick’s man, no time to talk”

    Like

    • 121
      Can you guess which dead Gibb I am says:

      No Barry it’s like this: I’m a bumsex man, no time for work.

      Like

  46. 54
    Steve Miliband says:

    Things are better but there’s no need to make a song and dance about it

    Like

  47. 56
    George Street (Mr) says:

    Is little baldy fat boy at 10 o clock flashing his cock to the bloke next to him? He seems interested . . .

    Like

  48. 57
    Moley says:

    Conservative Party to abandon politics and go into online groceries.

    Like

  49. 58
    Lee Won Pen says:

    Blue moon You saw me standing alone Without a dream in my heart Without a love of my own Blue moon

    Like

  50. 59
    Bulls**t Baffles Brains says:

    Oh god, I’m having flashbacks of the ’97 Labour victory celebrations…

    Like

  51. 60
    Anonymous says:

    Bye bye, baby bye bye

    Like

  52. 61
    George Street (Mr) says:

    Great British Traditions # 361. The Old Etonian Fart Wafters.

    Like

  53. 63
    Bill Quango MP says:

    … And try as we might we could not find a single black or ethnic face for this photo..

    Like

  54. 64
    Alfonse Mango says:

    Dave campaigns to dance solo, free from a forced duet with the Lib Dems and their two left feet.

    Like

  55. 65
    jgm2 says:

    Lots of posters. No mention of Labour on any of them that I can see.

    Like

  56. 66
    Dave says:

    UsKIP if you want to.

    Like

  57. 68
    George Street (Mr) says:

    Bruce Forsyth ‘delighted’ with replacement, scheduled to present first show late May, 2015.

    Like

  58. 70
    Lee Won Pen says:

    Stand Up if you hate Man U.

    Like

  59. 71
    trukipper says:

    Here’s a good one, stop me if you’ve heard it before…

    Like

  60. 72
    Red Ed the allmighty says:

    It not fair If Nigel Hums it Cameron plays it and they never invite me

    Like

  61. 73
    BBC 24hr rolling bollocks says:

    There’s no business like show business because real business I don’t know.

    Like

  62. 74
    Dave's version of the Rollins classic says:

    Like

  63. 77
    R. P. Weston and Bert Lee says:

    Goodbye-ee! Goodbye-ee
    Wipe a tear, baby dear, from your eye-ee,
    Though it’s hard to part, I know
    I’ll be tickled to death to go
    Don’t cry-ee! Don’t sigh-ee!
    There’s a silver lining in the sky-ee
    Bon soir old thing! Cheerio, chin-chin!
    Nahpoo! Toodleoo! Goodbye-ee!

    Like

  64. 79
    purveyor_of_turds says:

    he hides it under his hair but i have seen it. the dick on ed rubberfaces head is this big

    Like

  65. 80
    First time for ages BBC viewer says:

    Come on, join in.

    “The Hills are alive with the sound of UKIP ! “

    Like

  66. 81
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Dan Hodges’ dreams

    ” ..And it was thanks to your hard work that we secured a 206 seat majority …”

    Like

  67. 83
    dr steve brule says:

    Cameron denied it, but the audience knew he supplied it.

    Like

  68. 85
    Dancing Cheek to Cheek says:

    The man tipped to take over the role made famous by Fred Astaire” in the “Touring Version” hit West End revival of “Top Hat” gives an impromptu performance for fans.

    “I’m putting on my top hat,
    tying up my white tie, brushing off my tails……………….”

    Like

  69. 87
    Louche Lawyer says:

    You put the UK in,
    You don’t let it out,
    You screw the people over,
    And don’t give them a vote,

    That’s what LibLabCon Politics is all about!

    Oooooh It’s hokey EUkey, Oooooo It’s crookey EUkey……..

    Like

  70. 89
    Charlotte says:

    “I’d do anything for you dear, anything…for you dear, anything. Anything? Anything at all….”

    Like

  71. 91
    scottishcalvin says:

    Cameron dances away to demonstrate how fluke and chance are the last hope at the next election. “We’re up all night to get lucky…”

    Like

  72. 92
    Watcher says:

    Oh dear, he gets sadder by the hour. Is this the best Lynton can come up with?. One does hope so.

    http://news.sky.com/story/1258303/how-hot-does-david-cameron-like-his-nandos

    Like

    • 109
      C O (Ξ7s1) says:

      Well, it shows he is perhaps getting ready for life once he is booted out of office.

      Not sure if taking selfies with the diners is really the best PR – looks a bit creepy in the photo’s posted.

      Like

  73. 94
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Caption aside, they seem remarkably exercised about UKIP, including one berk right behind Dave.

    All publicity, and all that…

    Like

    • 100
      Alfonse Mango says:

      Not surprised given UKIP’s mainly eating into Conservative votes.

      The irony is it’ll bring a Miliband-Clegg government. Herman Van Rompoy must be licking his lips! Hilarious!

      Like

  74. 95
    Fruitcake and swivel eyed loony loving the panic and utter desperation says:

    ‘Have you heard the one about politician who lied to the electorate?’

    ‘First chance they got he was toast’

    Daaa raaar.

    Like

  75. 97
    Anonymous says:

    Will someone with a sensible policy step forward?

    Like

  76. 98
    Brian Cant says:

    Westminster busker taps up electorate for votes.

    Like

  77. 99
    C O (Ξ7s1) says:

    .
    .
    – Lib Dem’s Won’t
    – UKIP Can’t
    – Cameron Cυnt

    There – fixed it for them.

    Like

  78. 102
  79. 103
    Django says:

    David Cameron: “I tell you Mr Pickles arse is this big”!!

    Like

  80. 104
    gay black j€wish klansmen for tolerance and understanding says:

    nonce to see you… nonce!

    Like

  81. 105
    Genghiz the kahn says:

    Like a puppet on a string…

    Like

  82. 106
    domino says:

    Coz I’m (not) haaaapppy

    Like

  83. 107
    sometime I wonder, then I think who cares says:

    Oh hell betta hide Farage is on his way.

    Like

  84. 108
    Maimed Codger says:

    Boom Boom, it’s the way I tell em..

    Like

  85. 112
    Genghiz the kahn says:

    Once you get down Lambeth way,
    Ev’ry evening, ev’ry day,
    You’ll find yourself
    Doin’ the Lambeth-
    Doin’ the Lambeth-
    Doin’ the Lambeth walk!

    Like

  86. 113
    Braveheart says:

    Lib Dems Won’t, George Will, Theresa May, Walt Disney and Immanuel Kant.

    Like

  87. 115
    how about says:

    I am not a British isolationist.
    I’ve just done a very smelly fart.

    Like

  88. 118
    Maximus says:

    The Torah Party’s Mr Bojangles. He’ll dance to your tune.

    Like

  89. 119
    SFG says:

    It’s time to play the music
    It’s time to light the lights
    It’s time to meet the Muppets on the Muppet Show tonight

    Like

  90. 123
    Anonymous says:

    First I was afraid, I was petrified, I wondered how I could work with cleggie by my side, I should have changed the bloody lock, I should have sold his bloody key, but how was I to know the spineless twat would ask to follow me? Disabled voters go, crawl out the door, starve to death now, we just don’t want you anymore, aren’t you the ones that tried to scrounge the money dry, did you think we would support you? No no you are just left to die.

    Like

  91. 124
    Munsterbarry says:

    you put your left foot in…..
    depending on current populism polling of course.

    Like

  92. 125
    Hodor! says:

    stictly cam dancing

    Like

  93. 126
    Robert says:

    And remember, keeeeeeeep dancing!

    Like

  94. 127
    purveyor_of_turds says:

    at the Trafford centre, David Cameron kicks off the new balding man range fashion show for M&S

    Like

  95. 128
    Probably says:

    “Are you thinking what I’m thinking..?”

    Like

  96. 129
    Anonymous says:

    Would the REAL slim shady please stand up?

    Like

  97. 130
    Raving Loon says:

    Hello! ma baby
    Hello! ma honey
    Hello! ma ragtime gal
    Send me a kiss by wire
    Baby, ma heart’s on fire!
    If you refuse me
    Honey, you’ll lose me
    Then you’ll be left alone
    Oh, baby, telephone
    And tell me I’m your own!

    Like

  98. 131
    Ockham's Razor says:

    The referendum shuffle: Now you see it – now you don’t.

    Like

    • 162
      Baroness Ashton, Randy Bumgardner and the obligatory dyke says:

      Put out your tongue, put your hand in the air
      Make a V sign like you just don’t care

      Like

  99. 132
    gay black j€wish klansmen for tolerance and understanding says:

    lovely motor home a few hundred metres away from my abode with a radar dome on its roof- is that where you cia cnuts are hiding?! stirring the shit trying to get the uk involved in your fatalistic masterplan? every country in the world fucking hates you scumbags- but guess what they don’t fear you. yeah you don’t care about being hated as long as there is also fear. well there ain’t no fear. and you are completely and utterly fucked because bombing your own allies is the worst thing you could have done.

    Like

  100. 133
    sometime I wonder, then I think who cares says:

    And I will make , well try, well hopefully, well I will ask Farage to dance to my tune.

    Like

  101. 135
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Here is a game I can play all by myself.

    Like

  102. 136
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Dave: Now tell me, is this more fun than a Guido rave?

    Like

  103. 140
    Keep your pecker up says:

    And having visited Max in prison, I can actually tell you that it’s this long.

    Like

  104. 141
    Poet's day says:

    …. ‘ere, ‘ere, did I tell you the one about the MP, the actress and the cast iron guarantee? … no?2 … “they were all f*cked in the end…”

    Like

  105. 142
    Poet's day says:

    …. ‘ere, ‘ere, did I tell you the one about the MP, the actress and the cast iron guarantee? … no? ” … “they were all f*cked in the end…” (f’ing keyboard)

    Like

  106. 144
    Shorts3600 says:

    “Take your same sex partner by the hand, Move to the LEFT, move to the LEFT, move to the LEFT. FURTHER to the left. YEEEEEEE HAW!”

    Like

  107. 145
    albacore says:

    Brother ersatz Tories
    It’s a mystery
    How we ever conned Brits
    To voting for me
    Snider still and snider
    Were the vows I made
    Keep them in the E U
    Else we won’t be paid

    Like

  108. 146
    Integration at it's best says:

    The Conservatives aren’t wacist. Look, this is a parquet floor.

    Like

  109. 148
    Aaron D Highside says:

    “I never tell lies bigger than this.”

    Like

  110. 149
    Village Idiot says:

    ……”Do I act anything like my hero,Tony”?
    ….”Hands out like this and lean to the left”…

    Like

  111. 153
    Cynic says:

    Like

  112. 155
    Richard Burton says:

    And now ladies and gentlemen, for the next act, my sock puppet, Guido Fawkes!

    Like

  113. 157
    Dave says:

    And then I said to the sawn off little c*nt. “Been up the alley lately John?”

    Like

  114. 159
    Common Man says:

    It was quite a surprise when it was announced the UKs Eurovision contestant was David Cameron MP singing “Things will only get better”.

    Like

  115. 160
    Oh, really? says:

    So suck on this bad boy, Axelbitch!

    Like

  116. 163
    EC1 PhD says:

    Miliband’s progressive fiscal ontology of pre-distribution juxtaposed with his epistemological approach to short-circuited critical realist political input results in a level of intellectual confidence that cannot fail to win Labour a landslide at the next election.

    Like

  117. 164
    Ockham's Razor says:

    The Tap Dance Kid

    Like

  118. 167
    Anonymous says:

    Blair tribute act wins Eurovision.

    Like

  119. 168
    Dave Cee says:

    “Swing her round and do-si-do,
    We are crap, we’ll have to go!”

    Like

  120. 169
    Joe 91 says:

    The Twist, demonstrated by a twister.

    Like

  121. 170
    Sir Nob Skelpoff says:

    Cotton Eyed Cameron

    “His eyes wuz crossed, an’ his nose wuz fat,
    An’ his teef wuz out, but wat uv dat?
    Fur he wuz tall, an’ he wuz fat,
    An’ so my gal she follered him.
    Ef it hadn’t ben fur Cotton-eyed Cameron,
    I’d er been married long ergo

    Like

    • 172
      Bill Quango MP says:

      Where did he come from
      Where did he go
      Where did he come from
      We don’t know ?

      Like

  122. 173
    Brother York says:

    Dancing is like a shower: one wrong turn and you’re in hot water.

    Like

    • 192
      broderick crawford says:

      …. or put another way , dancing is like mismanaging personal use of toilet paper . One wrong move and your fingers are in the shit .

      Like

  123. 175
    Vinny says:

    Cameron:

    “… and this is why we are the only party who might be able to give you an EU referendum, if we win an outright majority”.

    “Of course, we could do it now, but fuck that.”

    Like

  124. 177
    Work it on out says:

    Twist and spout

    Like

  125. 179
    Alan says:

    Knowing me, David Cameron,
    Knowing you, the plebs of Britiain,
    Ahaaaa!

    Like

  126. 180
    Capt. Cameron says:

    “I know I may dance like your Uncle does at a wedding, but I dance like a really rich Uncle. Another round everyone?”

    Like

  127. 181
    Cameron work it on out says:

    Like

  128. 182
    non taxable pikey says:

    and this is how you do the Duck and Dive Jive.

    Like

  129. 190
    broderick crawford says:

    ” … finally to remind you , as the Chancellor has said several times ,we have a TRIPLE LOCK on your pensions .

    First — we’ ll reduce it

    Second — we ‘ ll omit certain payments to help the National Bankers Solidarity Fund

    Thirdly — with time and assuming we are re elected , we ‘ ll say it’ s no longer affordable and scrap it altogether.

    Conservative promise . Conservatively kept !”

    Like

  130. 191
    Lizzie says:

    Dave looks for partner who believes he can renegotiate EU membership in Britain’s interests …

    Like

  131. 196
    Ockham's Razor says:

    A referendum in 2107.

    Like

    • 212
      The tit in no.10 who likes to tell the voters what's good for him, not them says:

      No, you can have a referendum much sooner than that – but only after I’ve had time to redefine what a referendum actually is and lock the UK into the EU for ever.

      Remember, you’re all in (the sh)it together.

      Toodle pip !

      Like

  132. 197

    sing along now ” You’ve got you, under my skin……”

    Like

  133. 198
    The only Country in Europe not to have a Parliament is England says:

    fauxservatives EUSSR Referendum Okay Coky Dance

    Like

  134. 201
    Aparat says:

    “Well, it’s one for the money;
    Two for the show;
    Three to get ready;
    Now, go, cat go!”

    Like

  135. 202
    Brother York says:

    … and now for the new series of ‘Dancing on Thin Ice’…

    Like

  136. 203
    Aparat says:

    “And now, the end is here;
    And, so, I face the final curtain;
    My friend, I’ll say it clear;
    I’ll state my case, of which I’m certain;
    I’ve lived a life that’s full;
    I travelled each and ev’ry highway;
    And more, much more than this, I did it my way.

    “Regrets: I’ve had a few;
    But then again, too few to mention;
    I did what I had to do and saw it through without exemption;
    I planned each charted course, each careful step along the byway;
    And more, much more than this, I did it my way.

    “Yes, there were times, I’m sure you knew;
    When I bit off more than I could chew;
    But through it all, when there was doubt;
    I ate it up and spit it out;
    I faced it all and I stood tall and did it my way.

    “I’ve loved, I’ve laughed and cried;
    I’ve had my fill, my share of losing;
    And now, as tears subside, I find it all so amusing;
    To think I did all that;
    And may I say, not in a shy way;
    Oh, no, oh, no, not me, I did it my way.

    “For what is a man – what has he got?;
    If not himself, then he has naught;
    To say the things he truly feels and not the words of one who kneels;
    The record shows I took the blows and did it my way!

    [instrumental]

    “Yes, it was my way.”

    Like

  137. 204
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK SON OF COD AND CODFATHER OF SOLE says:

    “And by the time i offered the plebs a referendum , my nose had grown this long “

    Like

  138. 207
    Lady at a bus stop says:

    Dance like nobody’s voting

    Like

  139. 208
    Bottled the spin says:

    It’s my party and I’ll cry if I want to

    Like

  140. 209
    Ol' blue lies says:

    Start spreadin’ the news, I’m leaving today
    I want to be a part of it: Newark, Newark.

    Like

  141. 210
    Westminster Village People says:

    Y. M. C. Uh-oh…

    Like

  142. 211
    PhoneyCam says:

    Ra-ra-yes-Putin

    Like

  143. 213
    Bristolian says:

    Who’s the bald twat on the left?

    Like

  144. 214
    Julian Gibb says:

    First time I’ve seen him NOT on the back foot!

    Like


Seen Elsewhere

Comply or Die at Grauniad | MediaGuido
Labour Beats UKIP in South Yorkshire | LabourList
Mock the Week’s Weak Comedy | Nigel Farage
Can Jim Murphy Save Scottish Labour? | Guardian
There is Still Appetite for the Westminster Lunch | Jon Craig
Labour Turn Their Backs on Jewish Community | Dan Hodges
Chivalry is Not Dead | Laura Perrins
Jonathan Jones is a Tw*t | Iain Dale
Second Scotland Poll Suggests Labour Wipeout | Times
Paedo Probe Boss Urged to Quit | Sun
Keynesian Tories Won’t Eliminate Deficit | Tim Montgomerie


VOTER-RECALL
Find out more about PLMR


Zac Goldsmith: “The hon. Gentleman might like to know that today’s Guido Fawkes quote of the day is the one on drug laws that we have heard cited by a number of hon. Members.”

Mike Hancock: “I am delighted to hear that Guido Fawkes is talking about something other than me.”



“Digger” Murdoch says:

Is it just me, or is Nigel Farage just a top hat and a monocle away from being a Batman villain?


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