May 7th, 2014

Speaker Watch: Burns v Bercow Brought Into the Open

When the Speaker called his old adversary, the Tory roar of approval was made as (and taken by him as) anti-Speaker noise.

The Speaker had no need to say anything but felt he had to assert his position as the Prince of Proceedings –  “At my request” he said, others would be allowed to speak. “We are concerned also, I am sure,” (pointedly) “about others.” (Misfire. Small hiatus. Some embarrassment recorded from Labour benches.)

Simon Burns put in a jab at the end of his question: “I trust my Rt hon Friend has the time to answer the question in full.”

The PM, for the second week in a row, pulled the Speaker’s nose: “For my Rt hon Friend to be called at 12.33 on aWednesday shows that if you stick at anything, you can win.”

Much laughter again, the skirmishing between Burns and Bercow brought into the open.

Little Prince, trying to smile, attempted a further riposte: “I have always practised that philosophy myself: however long it takes, we are going to get through them. Kate Hoey!”

And at the end of PMQs: “Order!” And satirical Tory voices with fake disappointment go, “Ah-ohhh!”

Princely authority index: down.


  1. 1
    Eric Scunthorpe says:

    Better behaviour at my granddaughter’s nursery.

  2. 2
    The Speaker says:


  3. 3
    Joyce Grenfell says:

    That is because there is a grownup in charge at the nursery.

  4. 4
    sometime I wonder, then I think who cares says:

    Seems 5 years at play is far to long for the pieces or none work, their short attention span, shows they should never ever be allowed to play in a place where the grown ups work,

  5. 5

    Gideon – don’t do that

  6. 6
    Ockham's Razor says:

    He manages to be condescending without looking down on people.

  7. 7
    Tony Smooth says:

    I heard that a dangerous, thieving criminal was being hunted by the police.
    I was halfway to Dover with my emergency cashstash before I realised they meant the SkullCrusher.

  8. 8
    The Little Prince & his Queen of Tarts says:

    I wish the Bercows would just fuck off!

  9. 9
    And now some pathetic news.... says:

    And all the time, little RetardEd checked his dinner diary on his LeapPad Ultra, as Mr BallsUp had confiscated his Ipad for fu€king up the AstraZeneca open goal by not telling everyone that AstraZeneca had asked him to get all his friends on their side against the bigger boys. Sadly “all his friends” could fit on Mr. Squeekers’ lap and still have room.

  10. 10
    nell says:

    Let face it bercow is not Macchiavelli’s The Prince!

  11. 11
    nell says:

    Oh Dear I don’t think even bullyballs would want shriekyshriti gordon’s muse and now an astrazeneca advocate in his lap!!

  12. 12
    I despise English Football~ it's a mugs game! says:

    Bercow is a Hunt.

  13. 13
    The British media are cunts says:

    Well done President Assad for defeating the so called rebel scum backed by cuunts like gay Hague

  14. 14
    The British media are cunts says:

    What a shock, Gaydo is modding anything to do with a certain religion now.

  15. 15
    Analyst says:

    I suppose if you’re that height everyone’s an arsehole.

  16. 16
    Mr S K Ull-cracker says:

    Free as a bird I was.

  17. 17
    Piggy Trougher says:


  18. 18
    RomaBobbieBooBoo says:

    Surely Shirley you are not saying that the little wazzock is vertically challenged? :)

  19. 19
    Mr S K Ull-cracker says:

    Seems, you walk through a gate. And the world is on you like a ton of bricks.

    Go a fair way, walk in a jungle and spot some girls, you’re rich.

    I’m better off in there, you’re all mad,

  20. 20
    old b4 my time says:

    Hey is too grey to be a dark Prince!

  21. 21
    Toxic Labour for Spongers, Parasites, Criminals, Green Nazis, Peedos and other Wasters says:

    The political class are going to get a good kicking from ukip in the eu elections.

  22. 22
    Mr S K Ull-cracker says:

    The piss lovers?

  23. 23
    As I was saying says:

  24. 24
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Talking of analysis, have you seen the FT’s on UKIP?

    It gets two cheers. They seem to be coming out from their paywall somewhat, maybe because their audience has plummeted. It was never that big a following. But the increased lack of exposure has diminished their sharpness, I feel.

    Anyway, this is a reasonable start:

  25. 25
    Mr S K Ull-cracker says:

    Teresa May , voting UKIP!

  26. 26
    Wakey-Wakey Tories! Dave's Only In It For the Cash! He's going to cut and run says:

    FFS, we aren’t going to have your negative Tory whingeing all the way up to the General Election are we?

    Surely the grapes need to be pressed before they turn sour?

  27. 27
    Toxic Labour for Spongers, Parasites, Criminals, Green Nazis, Peedos and other Wasters says:

    would this be the religion that advocates raping and selling children?

  28. 28
    Belshazzar's finger says:

    Nice hair, big arse. I had one of those once. banged like a shithouse door in a force nine.

  29. 29
    That can be arranged.. says:

  30. 30
    Meds in cupboard beside the needle & thread. says:

    Where is Leechingcow Sally?

  31. 31
    Hedda Hopper says:

    R4 had on a Hollywood airhead who’s boycotting the Beverly Hills hotel because it’s owned by the Suntan of Brunei, who has just introduced strict Sh@ri@h law in his kingdominium. She’s also calling for Brunei to be expelled from the UN if he doesn’t rescind his decision pronto. She totally doesn’t realise that what she calls T@liban laws are enshrined in many Sl@mic countries (not to mention ever increasing parts of the UK…) Is this a sign liberals might be waking up to the reality of one of their favourite victim groups? Even @ngelina Jolie is condemning the kidnapping of schoolgirls by U Know Who…

  32. 32
    Cucurbita says:

    The Speaker is in need of a marrowing.

    Before you reach for Urban Dic, it is not in there… yet.

    Someone gets a prize marrow and thrusts it hard up Bercow’s arse. That is guaranteed to puff him up.

  33. 33
  34. 34
    Idon'tneednodoctor says:

    Even on the labour biased BBC Daily Politics Show the clips of Bercow were all aimed at the tory benches. Not one rebuke of labour.
    Bercow is an arsewipe and a complete twat.

  35. 35
    Idon'tneednodoctor says:

    You forgot :)

  36. 36
    catesby says:

    Vote Ukip simples!

  37. 37
    An Adult says:

    Dromey! Leave Umana alone!

  38. 38
    Mach 1 says:

    More the pauper than the prince.

  39. 39
    Fireman says:

    Gala Gordon and Cara Delevingne – could give them both a hosing down

  40. 40
    Grandad Voted Labour, Father Voted Labour, I Voted Labour says:

    I must admit, I’m seriously thinking about it.

  41. 41
    Plebiscite says:

    Try walking through a gate with a bike, mate!

  42. 42
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Lord Myners says:

    …the Co-op has been captured by insiders more interested in advancing their own careers than protecting the group’s commercial health.

    Does that remind you of something on an even bigger scale?

  43. 43
    Peter Mandyslime says:

    I am the true Prince of darkness.

  44. 44
    Ockham's Razor says:

    The report contains an extraordinary quote from an anonymous board member: “In a democracy, if I am elected and not adequately trained, then is it my fault?”

  45. 45
    Chuka Umunna says:

  46. 46
    nell says:

    Well maybe the true Prince of Darkness No.2

    But the true Prince of Darkness Par excellence is the dodgy St Bliar!

    I’d like to say the gurninggordon is no 3 in line, if only to build up his confidence, but unfortunately he is topped in that nefarious field firstly by twatson, then bullyballs and then several others like shirekingshriti.

    gormlessgordon at the end of his pm tenure was sadly revealed as nothing more than a demented puppet of the rest!! In much the same way as militwit is being exposed. They are not their own man!

  47. 47
    Bercow said Cameron is "finished" says:

  48. 48
    Podiceps says:

    Yes. Every human activity you can think of, since the dawn of time.

  49. 49
    nell says:

    Yes and who were the insiders ? Senior Members of the labour party aka bullyballs who has had very generous donations from the co-op bank , at the expense of the co-op’s members, for his support of folks like flowers!! Sorry can’t make myself refer to him as Reverend!!

  50. 50
    White rabbit says:

    A good pal of mine who’s been relaxed about the population replacement strategy in place over recent years has himself woken up to effect of said replacement with new bunch. Amazingly he’s always been persuaded by the ‘Britain is a Country of immigrants’ fucking baloney. I have resisted bellowing ‘I told you so you absolute bellend’ into his hairy elephantine ears, as the look of complete astonishment on his gormless face about recent issued population numbers was reward enough.

  51. 51
    nell says:

    Unfortunately chuckus yamoney who knows even less about economics than militwit does, is paid even more than that by we taxpayers!!

  52. 52
    nell says:

    As a family we have decided we are voting for UKIP in the EU elections. They are of no consequence anyway and we think the main three parties deserve a good kicking.

    Obviously come 2015 we shall revert to our old voting pattern.

  53. 53
    I fucking hate Slough says:

    He has to do more than carry his stupid coat for that salary…

    a) He has to listen to Bercow’s constant fucking whining.

    b) He has to put up with the midget’s insecurity about his height.

    c) He occasionally has to look at his hateful fucking wife.

    d) He has to wear a daft uniform.

    e) He has to pretend he likes working for the dwarf-cocked, porridge stirring c*nt.

  54. 54
    nell says:

    hmm I hope it’s not more sinister than that – hoefully he is not bercow’s bag carrier?!

    Bring back Betty Boothroyd!! Best Sp e a ker for a decade by a long chalk.!!

  55. 55
    PC 99 says:

    I think that the Squeaker ought to remember that he is the servant of the House, not it’s master. He should take a leaf from Mr Speaker Lenthall’s book ” I have neither eyes to see nor tongue to speak in this place but as the House is pleased to direct me, whose servant I am here.”

  56. 56
    White rabbit says:

    Bye.. watch the roads

  57. 57
    the peasants are revolting says:

    They’d better start fucking listening.

  58. 58
    Sesachili says:

    Probably has to service Sally every evening after dinner as well – poor lad….

  59. 59
    White rabbit says:

    It isn’t enough.

  60. 60
    Teabagger To The Sqeaker says:

    Knowing what Sexminster is like, bag carrier takes on a whole different meaning.

  61. 61
    carry on at your convenience says:

    Masters and Servants is a very popular pastime in the Strangers Bar so I’m told.

  62. 62
    White rabbit says:

    Has Bercow been sexed yet ?

  63. 63
    Vicars and Tarts party poopers says:

    One lump or two Vicar?

  64. 64
    Mr S K Ull-cracker says:

    A dear young relative who lived abroad for several years until last August suddenly transformed his opinion when he saw Woolwich had been invaded by the fokkers.

    Liberal beliefs have a high price. Wise security is relatively cheap.

  65. 65
    The British media are cunts says:

    What I tried to say and deleted by F@@@@s is Camermong was claiming that the whole world was disgusted by the abductions.

    Except it isn’t, where are the feminist protests outside mosques? The only thing I heard to day was some man hating feminist on Radio 5 moaning that the word girl was demeaning to women.

  66. 66
  67. 67
    Democracy Now says:

    I hope they get a kicking whether they listen or not. They are due a lot of payback for running a rigged electoral system.

  68. 68
    00.00 00:00 says:

    at o hundred hours, it is dark.
    o well says owl.

  69. 69
    The British media are cunts says:

    So Lord Miners claims that the Co-op bank is run by incompetent twats.

    Did he not notice who was running the economy for 13 years by chance? Fucking mega twats and one of them wants a second go.

  70. 70
    Mr S K Ull-cracker says:

    Right back in chokey now. Must get the footsie on, City isn’t it?

    Think I’ll turn this rad up too, bit nippy out.

    Mind how you go taxpayers.

  71. 71
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Well, yes, OBVIOUSLY. I mean, we don’t really want to rock the old boat now, do we? Just a little protest votey-poos. Cor, aren’t we brave, eh?

    Run by Europe? Yeah, why not! War in Syria? Go for it! More regulation and interference in our everyday lives? Oooh, yes please! Brown-hatters up the aisle? Of course!

    Nell, the CCHQ evening shifter.


  72. 72
    Ctesibius says:

    Yes but he couldn’t give a toss because arselicking Gordon Brown got him a title

  73. 73
    Normal Guy says:

    I shudder to think where that filthy tongue has been

  74. 74
    Mornington Crescent says:

    You really are an ar5e, sometimes, Forkes.

    I mean, you uncover a potentially expl0sive scandal about Labour being funded by AstraZeneca flunkies while defending them in the House – and you finish the day on… what? Another piece about that irrelevant little nark in the Chair.

    Sometimes, less really is more.

  75. 75
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    And “The Public Record” will show …

    And also how the legal fraternity have usurped and taken ‘Unlawfully’ control over parliament.

    Parliament has become a stinking, rotten and filthy cesspit of corruption, fraud and sleaze and every man and woman in there of all political colours is slowly bringing it down.

  76. 76
    disgusted of tunbridge wells says:

    Concise and to the point. Nicely put with just a hint of sophistication Belshazaars finger.

  77. 77
    C O (Ξ7t1) says:

    I think there is something very serious afoot with the current Speaker, particularly the precedents he is setting and how he is changing the nature of the role.

    That there exists such an overtly politicized Speaker is bad enough, but the way this one is behaving could have a lasting effect for future Parliaments.

  78. 78
    Bag or Sac ? says:


  79. 79
    leslie hillips says:

    leslie phillips trvelled a bit.
    cock crows.
    tottenhm hot.
    is it the end of legionaire disease?

  80. 80
    Belshazzar's finger says:

    Curious thing, I banged her namesake in the middle of Tunbridge Wells! Or she banged me. It was pissing down with rain and we decided to wait for it to stop. Suddenly, she climbed on top in the dr*ver’s seat. I had not thought such a position was possible until then. You have to admire initiative in women.

  81. 81
    HenryV says:

    The Speaker was somebody you respected, what happened? It is a good thing Parliament doesn’t actually do anything these days.

  82. 82
    Anonymous says:

  83. 83
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Barclays is expected to announce up to 15,000 job cuts as part of its new strategy due to be announced on Thursday, according to” Order Order” business editor Owen Jones.

    That is significantly above the 10,000 to 12,000 the bank has already announced it wants to cut this year.

    A large proportion will be in the UK – as high as 70%, Owen Jones said.

  84. 84
    Sock Watch says:

    7:34 pm and 8:23 both socks

  85. 85
    Anonymous says:

    Labour tax payer funded filth still at it.

  86. 86
  87. 87
    Sock Watch says:

    8:30 is a sock

  88. 88
    Pookie Snackumberger says:

    This is a system that the EUSSR would like to see abolished and their way of government put in its place, so . . .

  89. 89
    nell says:

    Nigel Farage pleads to press: “I don’t care what you call us but from this moment please feel free to call us a racist party.”

  90. 90
    Anonymous says:

  91. 91
    Anonymous says:

  92. 92
    Mr Speeka Berko says:

    Never mind about “start fucking listening”!!

    How about I start having a bloody good fuck!!

    Sal’s Alley is closed off – got the ‘NO ENTRY’ signs up.

    So it’s back to the Diversion for me.

    And people accuse ME of being bloody minded!!!


  93. 93
    Fruitcake and swivel eyed loony loving the panic and utter desperation says:

    Lindsay Hoyle.

  94. 94
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Possibly, C O, possibly.

    But that can wait. The Pfizer/AstraZ takeover is happening now. That the Leader of the Opposition is openly asking questions in the House and taking the side of the company that has close financial and human links to his own party is an absolute fucking scandal.

    I hold no candle for either company: Pfizer has recently shut its key UK R&D centre down the road from me in Sandwich, firing hundreds of scientists in the process. Hunts.

    But Militwit ain’t spe’aking up for Astra because it’s British; he’s spe’aking up for a company that has very, very close links to his party.

    The MSM – particularly the BBC – keeping schtum only confirms this.

    This is Cash for Questions – again.

  95. 95
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    So is 9:05 pm at number 82 – below. but what would i care – imitation is the best form of flattery. Oh and the fucking dirty mantra boys have had their day too.

  96. 96
    ChuckUsYerMoney and ChuckUsYerButty says:

    Be sensible!

    Listen to us ‘n lern!!

    We are the phewja – innit.

  97. 97
    Now there's a surprise says:

    Polish Commie outsider whose ideas have long ago been rejected by the British working class dislikes UKIP because they might support it.

  98. 98
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    The key to the covert duplicity against the public and the ‘goings on’ is the – ‘Off the record’ piece of an earlier blog. i Copied that quicko pronto – for the Public Record as many on here should do.

  99. 99
    Hang Hain says:

    How many OTR letters did Peter Hain or Tony Blair authorise?

    95 IRA members received them and were suspected of 295 murders.

    This is incredible stuff, perpetrated by British government ministers behind the backs of the people of Northern Ireland.

    Traitorous doesn’t describe it adequately.
    The biggest scandal ever really

  100. 100
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    The real BW has moved on. You are welcome to continue impersonating i.

  101. 101
    FIFY says:

    Vote UKIP, get UKIP

  102. 102
    Phil says:

    It’s all greek to me.

  103. 103
    Iain Duncan Smith says:

    Oy Vey !!

  104. 104
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    btw mr impersonator – i dare you to state from your hidden id anything as controversial that the real BW has is the past dared to state.

  105. 105
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Bollocks, Sir or Madam.

    MC is still the same MC – just a little more uninhibited after a few glasses of excellent Picpoul de Pinet.

    So may I kindly ask you to fuck orf back to your bedsit.

  106. 106
    T May says:


    Yankee go home

  107. 107
    C O (Ξ7t1) says:

    That goes back directly to the BDB stuff you were informing us of ages ago.

    The part of Parliament that is connected to is sort of m’odded here.

  108. 108
    Gordoom MacDoom of McDoomshire says:

    I shall return – by popular acclaim – to power in 2015.

    People will line the streets to wave at me and cheer my Cavalcade as it wends towards Downing Street.

    And then, with my trusty leftenants – the two Eds – at either side – I will deliver my homily entitled ‘The New Age Begins Here’ and I will do a signature jobby.

    Prepare yourselves!

  109. 109
    nell says:

    We have listened to chukusyamoney and learned that gordonbrown’s labour, that has now become son of brown’s labour under militwit is stillo economically illiterate!

    So what is new?

  110. 110
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    Oy vay fuck you too IDS at 9:23. sp correction “that the real BW has in the past dared to state.”

  111. 111
    A pain says:

    An indeed in need is a deed in the arse

  112. 112
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    BDB being the faux firm who connived over the murder of a certain man in the woods [lied to his family as well] – and ‘cos i got the faxes and more ‘on record’ – and they are indisputible.

  113. 113
    Reader says:

    What amazes me is how out of 640 or so MPs to choose from, the House og Commmons ended up with this fella. How di they manage that? Are they really that fucking stupid? Is the talent pool so shallow?

  114. 114
    nell says:

    Oh you have it all wrong now – militwit’s adviser says it is the Yankee Lootenants not the English Leftenants !! But what would labour know about the Uk Military. As gormlessgordon showed at that last Remembrance Service he attended as PM labour didn’t give a toss about the sacrifices of the military to labour’s ego wars!! bliar and brown just thought our servicemen were pawns in their dishonest political games!!

  115. 115
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    What about the ‘contract’ between Blair and the establishment?

  116. 116
    nell says:

    Oh the evil tongue!

  117. 117
    Reader says:

    Pat looks like he’s put on a pound or two.

  118. 118
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    p.s. Geoff Buff Hoon and charlie F and a few others of the inner NLP (New Labour Project / Neuro Linguistic Programming) cabal – have been rather ‘noticed’ by their ‘silence’ of recent years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  119. 119
    TE Lawrence says:

    50% would be better

  120. 120
    nell says:

    I thing the current s p e a k e r needs kicking out more than martin did. Let’s hope tories get in with a reasonable majority and get rid of this odious man!!

  121. 121
    Charles Darwin says:

    The politicial gene pool is a little shallow, so it stands to reason that the talent pool will also be a little thin…

  122. 122
    nell says:

    Well Hello fakenell – interesting you should start posting now .

    Why don’t you post under your own moniker? Are you ashamed of it?

    Or are so unimaginative, like ed’blank sheet of paper’militwit, you don’t have one?!

  123. 123
    Hedda Hopper says:

    What the Suntan and his male relatives get up to with jet-loads of young western women makes Hugh Heffner look like an unimaginative virgin…

  124. 124
    táxpáyér says:

    Every British passport owning jihadi killed there, is one less risk on our streets.

  125. 125
    jgm2 says:

    0:07 David Bellamy at the top of the stairs.

    0:24 Unnecessary Scottish Flag cycling through her screensaver despite English accent

  126. 126
    táxpáyér says:

    Come on now, r4p1ng a 9 year old girl, after waiting 3 years is the perfect life according to some.
    also a bit of murder, robbery, adultery and slavery.

    But a life worthy of emulating and containing wisdom applicable across not just a small hot sandy shit-hole.

  127. 127
    C O (Ξ7t1) says:

    The Astra situation is well beyond cash for questions.

    Suspect that given Labour’s balance sheet and lost direction, they may be politically controlled by the Union’s but economically they are completely beholden to their larger donors.

    This particular deal should be blocked as it is very short sighted and has massive implications for the NHS. But Labour perhaps need to be audited. Have been suspecting that their apparent strength in the polls has been in part to keep them afloat financially – by providing a reason to continue funding them – that question today perhaps seals such a conjecture case closed.

    But what happens if Labour goes bust this close to a GE which they perhaps are not going to do to well in ?

  128. 128
    jgm2 says:

    That’ll be the Revd Flowers. God told him to get blowjobs from man-whores and shove class A drugs up his nose.

    Sometimes simultaneously.

    Proof that God wants us to be happy I suppose.

  129. 129
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    Have you and your Greek family had secret hidden dynastic agendas which you think the people have not unravelled?

  130. 130
    jgm2 says:

    You should get an expert to deal with those kidney stones.

  131. 131
    White rabbit says:

    Fair to middling. Doesn’t exactly stick its head above the parapet.

  132. 132
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    The criminal element to all this is that there IS a ‘public controversy’ surrounding all of this … and it ‘pc’ is a key element mentioned in that crim law boook Arc. i bold.

    Oh the fucking irony of it all – turning their boook back on them. Ha,Ha,Ha fucking Ha!

  133. 133
    jgm2 says:

    Time, I think, for somebody to refer it to the EU competition commissioner.

    They have their uses.

  134. 134
    Ed Milibiscuit says:

    Wong Wive The Wevorution

  135. 135
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    They are at the bottom of the barrel.

    btw the FT ran an article about 10 years ago about the desperado CEO’s / border of mexico / corporate governance. i loved that article and still have a copy of it by the way.

  136. 136
    jgm2 says:

    For example that Fluoride (sic) is a heavy metal.

  137. 137
    táxpáyér says:

    Fluoride is a heavy metal is “controversial”.

  138. 138
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    Only miss take was that it wasn’t the FT – it was ‘The Business’.

  139. 139
    táxpáyér says:

    Smash the fascist UAF.

  140. 140
    jgm2 says:

    As does every public library in the civilised world.

  141. 141
    The British media are cunts says:

    There are a lot of nooses needed for fucking Liebore scum.

  142. 142
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    Who above all are the real desperate ones – out to impersonate many original bloggers on here – talk about being openly pathetic in their ‘at arms length’ attempts to create confusion – these fuckers have revealed themselves.

    Must be because there is so much at stake, so many lies – and so many in the van who have been ‘living the bigger lie’. Oh dear.

  143. 143
    I fucking hate Slough says:


  144. 144
    Some geazer on the Algarve says:

  145. 145
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    Question – Is there a new University course that majors on the intrigues and policies of the EU – or is there a new University course that majors on the brandisms of that twat Russel Brand and some of his ilk?

  146. 146
    Nurse.!! Two kilos temazepan ti to be administered rectally STAT...!!! says:


  147. 147
    Sock Watch says:

    So recherché and refined is your exquisite taste that I realise that you can be no other than the genuine article. Having spotted that nell had been impersonated, I assumed that the use of shouty capitals and the misspelling of our host’s name was sufficient evidence that someone was impersonating your illustrious moniker. My abject apologies are made upon bended knees and on broken glass shards.

    Alas, I do not possess a bedsit but shall take the earliest opportunity to acquire one so that I may make the necessary penance. Any preferred area?

  148. 148
    Apple says:

    All we neeed to do is arrest them for their crimes and bring them to trial. Is that so difficult? Our over-politicised police forces seem to think so. It doesn’t help that David Cameron is one of their supporters.

  149. 149
    EeeYepBlowing Whistles says:

    you are a jgm2 impersonator – and i claim your scalp – as for taxpayer pathetic troll below at 10:07 – your fee is not going to be paid tonight either.

    Keep it up guys – i’m lovin it. The trolls that keep giving.

  150. 150
    the belt says:

    had some fun with the microfiche today… found some stuff about sir jongle of cigar and a surprise about lord boothby. on the latter i learned that the booth boy (pun intended) was formerly a mp for aberdeenshire, which leads to the notion that if kilwinning lodge 0 is the mother lodge of scottish rite freemasonry is aberdeen lodge 1 the father lodge of scottish rite freemasonry? in symbolism terms a “0” is redolent of a vagina and a “1” looks like a penis. it was at that point that i remembered i have a very ancient picture of a worshipful master and it very much looks going by my memory like lord fucking boothby! i shall now diligently fuck off and find it from my treasure trove of interesting internet finds and return and upload it then the whole world can finally start to get the connection about freemasons calling children “kids” (reference to goats) and satanic abuse rings.

  151. 151
    You used to get some nice crumpet around Canterbury says:


    I used to live in Wickhambreaux in the late 70s. In The Street.

  152. 152
    jgm2 says:

    Labour majority when he was elected.

    Out of spite for their shit partisan speaker Martin being busted over allowing a Conservative MP to be arrested on wholly trumped up ‘national security’ grounds in the HoP when he was only leaking embarrassing stats they decided to show their contrition by electing a bloke whose commitment to the Tories is exemplified by his missus being a Labour councillor wannabe.

    Some might say this was further evidence that Gordon Brown is a C*UNT. I couldn’t possibly comment.

    I hope that explains what happened.

  153. 153
    EU Human Rights Commissonaire says:

    They should set up a small bank in the prison courtyard. Robbing financial establishments is obiviously vital to your sense of well being, and to be prevented from carrying out this activity is clearly a violation of your human rights.

  154. 154
    A Deaf Fat Cunt says:

  155. 155
    jgm2 says:

    What gave me away? Was it the use of (sic)?

    Or did you never claim Flouride was a heavy metal?

    Just checking.

    Us folk here at fake jgm2 like to know where we went wrong.

  156. 156
    when peter met tony. says:

    when cloak met darkness.
    kloak that kodak sa. moment.

  157. 157
    C O (Ξ7t1) says:

    It is getting some attention, and what is happening I personally do not think is right, but to assert that the world stands opposed is a false hyperbolic statement.

    Much of the world doesn’t actually give a toss. Thinking of the direct impact such news would have in say C’hina / I’ndia – which is just over a 1/3 of the population. Russ!a is busy with other things at the moment.

    M’uzzie world will side with their brothers – not in support of the actions but because that is what they do.

    I do not see many other nations prioritizing this as a major concern at present.

    So that leaves Dave and a few lobbyists in the US sniffing for federal funding $ and a junket to N’igeria, who will not be able to sell this as a distraction / rallying call to their respective publics.

    A libertarian position would be to not get involved. That is not a bad position either as the reasons why this has happened are deeply complex. Rash outside interference would likely result in the premature death of the girls involved, or stimulate further kidnapping’s in order for the kidnappers to recoup their losses and meet apparent demand.

    It is the government of N!geria’s responsibility to protect their own people.

    Assuming those responsibilities as outsiders will not help the N!gerian people who themselves should be dealing with this.

    What Dave is really worried about is the N!gerian people holding their government to account and possibly a coup resulting. That could have a negative impact on the hydrocarbon exports from that country which the UK is dependent on.

    The saddest aspect to this situation is that no one really cares at all about the girls (except maybe their families), but many wish to nonetheless exploit them and the situation in various ways.

    There is a sad truth about the world playing out here.

    Preventing the sequence of events which led to this situation occurring from repeating is a priority. That would require carefully crafted and coordinated policy.

    In the absence of good policy practitioners we have the plan B sound bites of Dave telling us what he thinks the world is feeling, as if that is really going to change anything.

  158. 158
    jgm2 says:

    I sometimes call the kids ‘kids’. Does that make me a freemason?

    I sometimes call them the ‘additional personnel’. Does that make me an HR manager?

  159. 159
    Anonymous says:

  160. 160
    Anonymous says:

    Make things up,they just can’t help themselves.

  161. 161
    No Prisoners says:

  162. 162
    Labia Cυnt says:

    Tubal-Cain 235.

  163. 163
    Anonymous says:

  164. 164
    jgm2 says:

    Watch out for the heavy toothpaste.

  165. 165
    No Prisoners says:

    I don’t think anyone is surprised. Labour are the nasty party.

  166. 166
    jgm2 says:

    Labour attacking UKIP?

    Do you remember when Labour were in power and the B&P were legally targeted by their tame race quango for being ‘racist’ because they were taking votes off Labour but ‘racist’ UKIP got a free rein because they were taking votes from the Tories?

    Do you remember that?

    How times change.

  167. 167
    C O (Ξ7t1) says:

    It is highly illegal to recklessly put at risk the health of a corporate entity.

    The Co-Op’s board was subverted by a non-commercial form of hostile takeover, the political and commercial equivalent of a dog day visit from Mr Skull-Crusher nee Ed Balls.

    Labour’s entanglement with the Co-Op banking group needs to be fully audited. There is so much here that is just obviously criminal it is ludicrous. Once the Co-Op group itself has been stabilized, then the real accounting can begin.

    The board member quote is most amusing and may be considered contempt if offered as a defence.

  168. 168
    C O (Ξ7t1) says:

    Winston McKenzie is a solid guy and was a good candidate. Great to see him active and fighting in the UKIP corner !

    Just wanted that on the record here.

  169. 169
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Enjoy sock puppetry responsibly.

  170. 170
  171. 171
    C O (Ξ7t1) says:

    The vid – take the &list bit out for embedding / make h**p not h**ps :-)

  172. 172
    The British media are cunts says:

    Enough of the fucking #bringbackourgirls fucking shit you media mongs. A bunch of white middle class lesbians and feministas wanking away on Twatter isn’t going to have any effect on the Muslim tosspots in Nigeria.

    You wait until more of these Muslim wankers are running the streets here in the UK, you’ll be doing as your fucking told by then.

  173. 173
    The British media are cunts says:

    Saw BBC lefty Norman Smith talk about UKIP today. guess what the first word out of his gob was? Yep “racists”

    They really do need to change their tune in the media, I’m no fan of UKIP as people know here (full of Tories that fucked us over on Europe and also a unionist party that can’t see the jocks and taffs don’t like us) but I will give them my vote this month just to fuck off the media wanstains.

  174. 174
    The British media are cunts says:

    At least the young women won’t be getting touched up not like a Limp Dim conference.

  175. 175
    Blowing Whistles says:

    We are coming for you Blowing Whistles. Peter Tatchel told us where you live. We are MOSSAD and we have radioactive fluoride 235. You can’t hide from us. We start all the wars and control all the money. We also give the best blowjobs.

  176. 176
    A Tory Troll says:

    Sorry we are not currently accepting comments on this article.

  177. 177
    south of the M4 says:

    No expletives and a lack of incisive comment about Gordon Brown’s true character.

  178. 178
    Pookie Snackumberger says:

    It might be that the enemy of the people and the main thrust of the dirty, underhand and desperate attacks on UKIP, and by extension, the common sense voters, is Common Purpose.

    Common Purpose have a lot to lose if the tide turns against all that they have worked for and secretly put into place over many years.

    UKIP have already, without really trying, shone a bright light into the nest of collaborators that is the Liblabcon the BBC and the EU, now their light might expose Common Purpose to the public at large.

    UKIP: Hacking at the roots with the truth.

  179. 179
    Perfect words says:

    Hear, hear.
    I’d like to see Pat on QT.

  180. 180
    sometime I wonder, then I think who cares says:

    Sky just had a go at UKIP well the so called newspaper experts did, somebody should tell them, they’re too late.

  181. 181

  182. 182
    Labour the party that doesn't work. says:

    If Chuckus is let loose in government of the country there will be an exponential increase in the “envelope licking” department. Chuckus will, of course be fulfilling his potential.

  183. 183
    Anonymous says:

    I heard he’s hung like a hippo Nell.
    Surely you’ve got a soft spot.

  184. 184
    pigs in space says:

    Maybe Gordon can use that excuse for his destruction of the economy.

  185. 185
    táxpáyér says:


  186. 186
    táxpáyér says:

    Want to raise incomes even faster than rents?

    Tax land rights instead of incomes

  187. 187
    Daft EdMiliband says:

    If North Korwea have went contwols, then we in bwittan must emulate that gwate dad said Marxism was good thing so I shall be copying north Korwean powicies.

    I am an intewectual ! Onenashionlabour…vote for Ned !

  188. 188
    Podiceps says:

    There really was radioactive toothpaste, the well named Doramad marketed in Germany during the war:

    However, it contained thorium rather than the dreaded heavy fluoride. I think there was another brand with radium some time previously, during the years when radioactivity was supposed to be good for you.

    That era lasted longer than you would suppose. In Italy as late as the 1970s you could get a mineral water with the slogan L’acqua la più radioattiva nel mondo.

  189. 189
    the belt says:

    the wonderful legendary letter from the tatch at the bottom of the following gallery.

    the scally was dealt with by major sueing cos they printed he was having an affair with a caterer- he won the magazine closed down. turned out of course he was actually having an affair with edwina!!!
    so macc alpine whilst correct in terms with saying scally had been dealt with was basically being very economical with the truth. as for you cnuts who want to turn the serious issue of abuse of minors into some sort of claim it is an assault on this political party or that party you need your fucking heads stoving in. fucking scum. there is a fucking legion of us who were turned over by you disgusting vermin and guess what?! we are all grown up now and we’re out to get you scumbags. one of the fuckers who did me when i was a kid was prince charles… at the paratroopers aldershot barracks- i was between the age of 5 and 6 at the time. your monarch/cosmos prog is smashed to shit and you are going to get nuked.

  190. 190
    the belt says:

    have some paste of a different kind my response got stuffed into the moderation and let’s face it the guido crew are probably nuts deep in hookers and gak at this time of the night.

    but by the the power of the internut you can read what i posted here…

  191. 191
    Anonymous says:

  192. 192
    albacore says:

    Fawkes is right about this being tittle-tattle
    All the arseholes in Parliament do is prattle
    Well, that’s how they play-act for public consumption
    Sussing their machinations don’t take much gumption
    If you bust a gut selecting useless spare parts
    They could not make a cock-up as big as those farts

  193. 193
    Fruitcake and swivel eyed loony loving the panic and utter desperation says:

    I see the useful idiots were at it again last night. They just don’t get it.

    They’re not alone. The idiot Craig on Sky News hasn’t got it either.

    Vote UKIP, get UKIP.

  194. 194
    non taxable pikey says:

    Send the BBC, they seem to be good at finding under-age girls.

  195. 195
    Prime Minister David Cameron says:

    I just farted and burped simultaneously.

    My bucket list is getting shorter every day.

  196. 196
    non taxable pikey says:

    This civil war has been going on for over 1350 years and it’s still stalemate. If Assad eventually “wins” then he becomes head fly on top of a manure heap. Destroying the infrastructure and displacing over half of the population isn’t winning.

  197. 197
    UKIP 4 ALL says:

    Yeah the BBC will get right on it!

    Oh thats right, the BBC is doing exactly the same thing just like the cartel and their media stooges.

  198. 198
    UKIP 4 ALL says:

    Now “quaffing” red wine is is a real crime against humanity isnt it? If they had been merely drinking like any normal liblabcon supporter it would have been fine, but “quaffing” is nothing less than a racist hate crime.

    Dont vote UKIP because their supporters “quaff” their drinks, this is SKY news bringing you the real stories.

  199. 199
    UKIP 4 ALL says:

    A gang of violent white bigots screaming abuse at black people would normally be classed as a race hate crime, the BBC would lead with it and the cartel would be calling for arrest and prison time for the offenders.

    Aaah but the offenders are funded and supported by the the BBC and the liblabcon cartel, their new brown shirt army of violent thugs encouraged to begin a new political terror campaign.

    Welcome to the future if the cartel remains in power.

  200. 200
    Ed Stalinbrand says:

    I think congratulations are at hand. I helped to get rid of 14,000 British workers jobs at Barclays.

  201. 201
    RED ED - SON OF BROWN says:

  202. 202
  203. 203
    Iain Duncan Smith says:

    I say ,I say, I say

    Barclays to slash 19,000 jobs and create bad bank

  204. 204
    Django feeling nasty this morning!! says:

    I didn’t really think much of Ms Bercow but find I’m warming to her now because of the trouble she must produce for her husband. The Speakers rooms are sumptuously kitted out in a colour called rocky marriage. They deserve each other. Disney could make a cartoon about them “Snow Yellow and the Nasty Dwarf”!

  205. 205
    Prime Minister David Cameron says:

    Manure Investing.

    I don’t buy into that shit.

  206. 206
    Labour says:

    For our next party political broadcast, we’re going to show Cameron shooting an old woman and burning down an orphanage.

  207. 207
    Time for change says:

    A general knowledge test should be passed before anyone receives their ballot paper. It’s too important a decision to be left to witless fuckwits.

  208. 208
    C O (Ξ7t1) says:

    Placing their European retail into a bad bank with a view to getting rid of it is quite telling.

  209. 209
    Jimmy Savile, deceased says:

    Now then, now then…

  210. 210
    Tosser Dave. says:

    Nintendo aren’t allowing gay characters. This is outrageous. It does not reflect our real life ConLibLab bumsex paradise at all.

    I will introduce legislation immediately to stop this perversion of cyberspace.

  211. 211
    Tom Badwind says:

  212. 212
    Fuckless Witlets says:

    What about us?

  213. 213
    Calamity Clegg, Chief Cockroach says:

    GULP !!

  214. 214
    Ockham's Razor says:

    I would call that a substantial shift in the narrative.

    Is that it or is there more? I suspect the latter.

  215. 215
    Weird Ed says:

    Ooh-can you teach me how to do that?

  216. 216
    Olga Popups says:

    Not in Scandinavia in the middle of June it isn’t! Never heard of the midnight sun, Sunshine?

  217. 217
    Olga Popups says:

    Yes – some Armenian entrepreneur will no doubt make another fortune rebuilding the country.

  218. 218
    C O (Ξ7t1) says:

    Better to describe as axis rather than nest, but Common Purpose UK and its European division need to be eradicated.

    Recall this from Libya…

    Looks like Common Purpose have taken that blog entry off their main site now.

    The ‘wild flowers’ of Benghazi – the kind of allegory that mong’s like Cameron dream up without the aid of hard drugs to describe diverse locals who running around with AK-47s wishing to exterminate anyone who has the temerity to describe them as flowers, or who do not like the idea of S’haria.

  219. 219
    Olga Popups says:

    Do keep up dipshit – all that was over 25 years ago. You got your head in a coal hopper?

  220. 220
    still, it could be worse says:

    hardworking Britain better **** off

  221. 221
    Vlad the Loudhailer says:

    The Tories response should be to publish the Chilcot report.

  222. 222
    C O (Ξ7t1) says:

    That graph seems to be reindexed to 100 in 2005.

    Rents have increased by ~ 8% for England whilst average weakly salaries have increased ~ 25%.

    As a result of that increase, the ratio of average rents to salary is needed for 2005 in order to figure if the increases have kept rents ahead of salaries.

    Without that information, even though salary growth re-indexed to 2005 is rightly above the average rents, the actual salary levels may still be below the rent levels which maybe Labour’s argument.

    This type of bait and switch on growth figures is one of the tricks that Osborne is using to convince people that the UK economy is doing well, despite the obvious evidence on the high street that it is still far from recovery.

  223. 223
    Olga Popups says:

    I’d like to see him as mayor of Birmingham

  224. 224
    Olga Popups says:

    Craig never quaffs – he merely gulps and swallows. Where do Sky find these nincompoops from?

  225. 225
    Hedda Hopper says:

    Thanks for that, Max. Didn’t realise there was a statute of limitations on mega-hypocrisy! Are you really naïve enuf to think this shyt isn’t still going on, even as the Suntan imposes strict sh@ri@h on his less wealthy subjects? Here’s a story about the Suntan’s 40-strong harem that’s five years old, not 25:

  226. 226
    Hedda Hopper says:

    I see now that particular harem is the property of the Suntan’s brother – but we know from other accounts that they like to share!

  227. 227
    non taxable pikey says:

    Ah, but who will pay for it? 148 Syrian Pounds to the Dollar when it used to be less than 20. Doubt the Armenian can cover that or would want to.

  228. 228
    RightwinggitRedux says:

    If the woman and orphanage are in Somal1a,

    he’ll get votes.

  229. 229
    disgusted of tunbridge wells says:

    Nell, Bercow will never need a bag carrier – his balls are too small. Dwarf sized.

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Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”

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