May 6th, 2014

WATCH: Boris’ Non-Denial Denial on 2015 Run

A smiling Boris swerved the question on whether or not he would stand for parliament in 2015 on LBC:

BJ: “The chances of me being Prime Minister…”

NF: “That’s not quite the question. What about Boris two jobs Johnson?”

BJ: “The job of Mayor of London is the best in British politics.”

Will he ever be PM?

BJ: “It’s not going to happen.”

NF: “Ever?”

BJ: “Of course not.”

Roll on 2020…


  1. 1
    Shit Stirrer Watch says:

    We could all be dead by 2020!

  2. 2
    Mr Clifford says:

    CPS charging decision on Freddie Starr expected soon.

  3. 3
    angelnstar says:

    Nick Ferrari is not logical. The PM, Ed Miliband, May, Hague, Balls, etc. etc. all do two jobs, their Cabinet job and they are also MPs. But this is not allowed for Boris Johnson?

  4. 4
    David Cameron says:

    “Locked in a disused fridge”?…. Boris was really getting somewhere with that! Don’t interrupt Ferrari you fat sweaty spiv!

  5. 5
    Anonymous says:

    “Boris’ Non-Denial Denial on 2015 Run”
    Although he didn’t deploy the Farage Gambit, and say he wasn’t opportunist.

  6. 6
    Glott Allstop says:

    He’ll decide when the time’s right. It’s like asking if you’ll leave home with an umbrella on July 27th, you can’t tell now. Boris will wait to see the political weather.

    He was a crap MP last time he was in parliament. I suspect he could only make it work as party leader or maybe education secretary.

  7. 7
    sounds good to me says:

    is this the new tory economics for hard times – a job share with two salaries and two expense accounts?

    oh – and two lots of appearance fees for fatuous political tv interviews

  8. 8
    Here we go again... says:

    Rolf Harris trial starts today.

    Stuart Hall trial starts today.

  9. 9
    Owen"Get Britain Out" Jones says:

    EU membership has not given the UK any “insider advantages” in trade with other European countries, a report by Owen Jones’s think tank says.

  10. 10
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Ed Balls and Ed Miliband are like your immature relatives from hell.

    You spend several years painstakingly getting your dilapidated property converted, curing the rising damp, fixing the leaking roof, replacing the rotting wood.

    Then you carpet the place to make it cosy and fit expensive soft furnishings to deaden whatever residual noise remains from installing new windows throughout in traditional style.

    Then they descend on you, uninvited and unannounced. Whilst you have to take a phone call, they sneak to your fridge, remove some bacon, set it out in a trail from the patio to the lounge. They then move onto the next room…

    When you return from the phone call, you find that the local fox has followed the trail and has just done a dump in the middle of your best fabric settee. The place stinks and you find flees from this incident for the next ten years.

  11. 11
    Ah! noisy says:

    A fifth of Britons have said they would have sex with an android, but considerably more fear the rise of the machines will threaten mankind.

    We need to get them into Parliament first.

  12. 12
    Penfold says:

    And Boris, of course, would never prevaricate, haver or bluster.

    God save us from these useless swine.

  13. 13
    Where are Tony Blair's Expenses says:

    God help us if this public school prat ever becomes PM

  14. 14
    Raving Loon says:

    Nigel for PM?

  15. 15
    Jeremy Clarkson says:

    Has anyone ever seen a non-white cautiously look over their shoulder before uttering the line “I’m not racist but…..” Thought not…..

  16. 16
    Long John Silver' s parrot says:

    Bo you really want to employ a man who starts spouting gibberish when you ask him a half relevant question which he could have foreseen heading his way?

    The answer is obviously “no”.

    Thanks to Guido we are all aware the Boris Johnson is not the answer.

  17. 17
    Ed Moribund says:

    You would be lucky.
    They should have taken your house and given it to an asylum seeker and you should have been deported for colonial guilt.

  18. 18
    Sir Nob Skelpoff says:

    They must be desperate if they are wheeling out this degenerate.

  19. 19
    Fishy says:

    A small, angry Speaker from Buckingham,
    In temper, his plates, he was chuckingham,
    The cause was his wife,
    Who, throughout her sad life,
    Liked picking up strangers and fuckingham.

  20. 20
    Ed Moribund says:

    It’s going to happen. It’s an unstoppable force.

    Do the maths yourself.
    Dave needs 42% of votes just to have a majority of 1.
    I only need 35% of votes to have a majority of 40.

    But let’s say the public realises I’m a geeky knob. And I only get a Gordon brown level of 28%.
    Dave will likely get 36% leaving him short of a majority. UKIP will have taken his votes but delivered at the very, very best 5 seats.

    Meanwhile the libs will have shed 20 seats..mostly to me.
    I offer Vince incapable a pact, he ousts Clegg, and we are in coalition.

    And that’s on 28%. No one ever is going to get lower than brown did.
    Certainly not on their first go before they have fuged it all up.

    But even if I did get 26% I can call in the snp with bribes.

    Really, I can’t lose. I just can’t.

  21. 21
    Weird Ed says:

    The Torwees want to bring back fox hunting. There will be no cwisith for foxeth under a Labour government. And if I might thay, thir, you are a foxophobic bigot whoseth viewsth justhtify our plansth for a Foxophopia Unit at Defra.

  22. 22
    ca or ka says:

    is anyone free?

  23. 23
    Big bad john says:

    My apartment always smells a bit fishy. Has someone left a deposit in there?

  24. 24
    Max Clifford: Hero of the left says:

    Another silver spoon Tory toff wants to rule the plebs

    Soon this great nation will have a Marxist as its leader,,, rejoice at that great news!!!

  25. 25
    Ed sound bite says:

    Fweeze the cost of foxes

  26. 26
    HMP-leisure says:

    Especially if the Skull Crusher finds out where we live

  27. 27
    jgm2 says:

    It could be worse.

    We could have Ed Miliband. Who, apparently has found a non-job for the Maximum Imbecile to keep him ticking over. Food-bank czar or somesuch nonsense.

    What this means is that if Miliband becomes PM we’ll have the Imbecile gurning around the country taking it upon himself to ensure ‘the poor’ want for nothing food-wise.

    In other words, if his record as chancellor and PM is anything to go by (and it should be) then we’ll have a famine by 2016. We’ll be getting food aid from Ethiopia.

  28. 28
    jgm2 says:

    It already has.

    All rise for your (non-elected) EU overlord, Barroso.

  29. 29
    Ghost of J.S says:

    Its KNOCKOUT blow for us all

  30. 30
    Owen Jones - peoples poet says:

    I can’t wait. But mum says I must sit my exams first.

  31. 31
    Ghost of J.S says:

    stfu Jez

  32. 32
    Free the Max One says:

    You will soon be free Master

  33. 33
    Bearded Cùnt says:

    I didn’t threaten the MCConviles..oh no, not I, I deny it totally, I am innocent

  34. 34
    horace says:

    True…. 2015 a Lab-Dem pact on the cards

  35. 35
    Ed Ballslap says:

    My wife’s mechanical and emotionless, does this count?

  36. 36
    Racism Watch says:

    Jeremy Clarkson once said “There is nothing more painful to me at this stage in my life than to walk down the street and hear footsteps and start thinking about robbery. Then look around and see somebody white and feel relieved”

    Sorry, my mistake. Clarkson never said that. The Reverend Jesse Jackson said that, and so it it’s just fine.

  37. 37
    Fruitcake, swivel eyed loon enjoying the utter panic says:

    Ed. What happens when the public realise you’re a geeky knob and you’re at McMental level of 28% and UKIP nick another 3%???

  38. 38
    I Asimov says:

    Yes Yvette fulfils both catagories but flouts the 3 laws of robotics.

  39. 39
    Daedalus says:

    Im going to build myself a spaceship, and escape this shite.

  40. 40
    He's a useless weasel says:

    + 1

  41. 41
    Skull Cracker says:

    Could someone direct him to the Balls residence?

    “Skull Cracker” robber Michael Wheatley, who absconded from an open prison, has been seen in London. Police were called to an address in Twickenham, south-west London, on Monday evening, but did not find him.

  42. 42
    Skull Crusher says:

    Easy mistake R.W

  43. 43
    Bim says:

    Farage cannot be said to be opportunist – he has spent years almost alone defending Britain from the EU when no one else was interested.

  44. 44
    Limp-dem says:

    Is it “Skull Crusher” or “Skull Cracker” – there is a difference we ought to be aware of. We must not violate his rights, in correctly identifying the individual. Once in Police custard he will be tagged, and returned to the open prison from whence he came.

  45. 45
    Nuke the IRA says:

    I loved the interview with Jean McConvile’s daughter on the news last week when she said “I’m not scared of them. What are they going to do, kill me? They know where I live”. Bravo!

    And as for Gerry – hope you get cancer, you rotten c-unt.

  46. 46
    Frances Crook says:

    I like the way you think. Would you like a job at the Howard League?

  47. 47
    iPoke says:

    It would have to be Android v4.4 at least.

  48. 48
    Milimarx says:

    Imbecilus Maximus would never countenance playing second fiddle to a non-entity like Miliband, even doing it for the B£air Witch made him writhe in self-loathing.

  49. 49
    Abu Cat Hoarder says:

    Look over their shoulder?

    They can march through the centre of our cities shouting “Kill Whitey” and the police protect THEM.

  50. 50
    catesby says:

    Bonkers Boris will make a terrible PM, but it’s unlikely the Unconservatives will ever form a majority again thank God. Millipede PM or not will destroy his own party eventually. Trouble is an England without Jockoland could be dominated by careerist Tories feathering their nest.

  51. 51
    Shade of Eddie Wearing says:

    I kept shouting up and under – I didn’t know Stuart would take it all so literally.

  52. 52
    Anonymous says:

    Will be talking about #BringBackOurGirls on @loosewomen @ITV today at 12.30— Harriet Harman (@HarrietHarman) May 6, 2014

  53. 53
    Shade of Eddie Wearing says:

    BoJo is not even the question.

  54. 54
    Village Idiot says:

    …..I have been banging on about “IT” since 1975,when we had a dodgy,misinformed vote,and I have detested what has become of this European region ever since!…I have tremendous admiration for Farage,and he is a very brave,inspirational fellow!….I voted “No” in ’75,but have had to endure the destruction of Great Britain,for the last 40yrs,without being able to do anything about it!

  55. 55
    Village Idiot says:

    May as well vote UKIP then,nothing to lose and the others have had their turns,and look at our country!
    Until they offer to govern in the interest of Britain and not for themselves and,the wretched EU,i will not give them my vote!…There,..that will frighten them!

  56. 56
    Jim Royle says:

    Why don’t you print on here the audited accounts for the Boris bike fiasco.

    Operating at break even, my arse.

  57. 57
    Rob Roy says:

    An independent England alongside an independent Scotland would be good for both countries in terms of competition.

    There would simply be no room for complacency either side of the Border.

    Issues would have to be addressed and there will be a lot fewer hiding places and free lunches along the way.

    A vote for a free Scotland is the first step to a better future for all UK citizens.

  58. 58
  59. 59
    My crystal ball sees all. says:

    Boris needs to hang-fire and not stand at 2015. He needs to see his current job through and then I’m sure a seat will become available at a later date.

  60. 60
    Hannukkah Rice says:

    + 1. He’s a fucking idiot.

  61. 61
    thostids says:

    What’s Hughes doing whilst Clegg is rattling his tin in Brussels and Vince is considering his options with Ed Millimetre. Clearly getting his private bits caught in the Android’s dust-covers.
    You couldn’t make it up.

  62. 62
    Dangerous Brian says:

    When you put it like that it doesnt sound such a bad idea.
    Will we get a new wall?

  63. 63
    broderick crawford says:

    “Boris will wait to see the political weather ….”

    Oh you mean like the age -old tried and tested custom of a desert Arab wetting his finger with saliva first thing in the morning and sticking it out of his tent to see if the wind is blowing up a sandstorm .

  64. 64
    broderick crawford says:

    I’d change her for Debbie Harry (Blondie) if I were you Ed .

    She s still a goer at 65,

  65. 65
    Anonymous says:

    Even on Independence Day, not sure that the Rise of the Machines will Make the Earth Stand Still, but the (Auto check-out) machines will Terminate local jobs. For when was the last time such a machines spend in local shops – let alone say I’ll Be Back?

  66. 66
    Anonymous says:

    Why has no one mention Boris and his views about the catastrophic consequences of invading Iraq?

    For speaking on his LBC phone-in, Boris said he had voted in favour of military action in 2003 – though he was aware that claims about WMD were nonsense. Having voted for a war (that he was aware was likely to be illegal), is Boris using his radio skills to wash his hands of any blame?

  67. 67
    By the way says:

    Did this internet site report on ‘Reset the Net’? The day of action, on June 5, to mark a year since the Edward Snowden’s leaks – as reported by RT.

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Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS

Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”

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