May 1st, 2014

Newark By-Election on June 5th


  1. 1
    Steve Miliband says:

    Can you still fly to Newark?

  2. 2
    Raving Loon says:

    Now who is waving the white flag?

  3. 3
    Biggles says:

    You can fly anywhere?

  4. 4
    Rickytshirt says:

    You can parachute in if you have the right credentials.

  5. 5
    dai salivating says:

    is gerry adams standing?

  6. 6
    £££££££££££££ says:


  7. 7
    Mitch says:

    The Conservatives are clearly hoping that a Hold for them will burst the UKIP post-Euro bubble.

  8. 8
    Ed Sillyband says:

    I will fixth the vote

  9. 9
    Mosk Demolitions plc says:

    Should benefit recipients and incomers have the vote? Of course not. The rock liebour twenty eight percentage made up of these shirkers and the brain dead coaxed and treated by the Maximum Imbecile and the illegal War Monger should have no right to representation.

  10. 10
    Tory Spokesman post-5th June says:

    “What this result shows is that the UKIP performance in the euro elections was a understandable protest vote, but when it comes to parliamentary elections voters still prefer the main political parties.”

  11. 11
    Me says:

    If you had lived in Newark all your life and were made redundant today, you would still feel entitled to vote. Otherwise, I would generally agree with you.

  12. 12
    Weird Ed says:

    Of course…the more people vote for me the merrier we will be.

    Vote for me, vote for me:

    No welfare cuts
    Free Money
    No Bedroom Tax
    Smaller energy Bills
    Free food
    Cheaper rents
    Cheaper petrol
    Less inequality – I’ll confiscate the money earned by the rich and give it to you
    Fewer JCP sanctions
    The end of workfare
    Mansions for the poor (but no mansion Tax for Labour voters)

    Vote Labour on June 5th for your free share of other people’s money

  13. 13
    EU Allowances says:

    We’ll all be there…well, there’s not much else to do?

  14. 14

    Just anuvver boring erection, innit!

  15. 15
    Martin McGuinness says:

    I like killing.

  16. 16
    FrankFisher says:

    Yup. was talking about this last night – UKIP cannot let up for ONE MINUTE after Euro victory, we must maintain the surge to Newark.

  17. 17
    Labour candidate says:

    Stop spreading the booze
    I’m parachuting today
    I want to be a part of it
    Newark, Newark
    I want to wake up in a constituency full of sheep

  18. 18
    jgm2 says:

    If they’re not careful the Tories will come third in the by-election.

  19. 19
    Donald Sterling says:

    This Jeremy Clarkson sounds like a helluva guy. Anyone who hates schwartzas is ok by me.

  20. 20
    Murderous IRA scum deserve to die says:

    If I had my way, he’d be limping.

  21. 21
    Anon says:


  22. 22
    Son of Prescott, Son of Blair, Son of Straw, Son of Harman says:


  23. 23
    Jeremy Klaxon says:

    as long as it’s not a fucking n*****, I couldn’t care less

  24. 24
    Nigel Farage says:

    Is Gerry Adams standing for election?

  25. 25
    FrankFisher says:

    And torturing children, so I hear.

  26. 26
    Tariq Ebrahim says:

    Will 65,000 posting votings help thank you please?

  27. 27
    Not Sure says:

    If UKIP thought they could win, Farage would have stood. No question.

  28. 28
    Clarkson says:

    My mirror has gone way too far this time :(

  29. 29
    Cyril Smith says:

    All good fun.

  30. 30
    J Edgar Dyson says:

    Newark Wanker By-Election on June 5th

    There. Fixed it for you.

  31. 31
    Anonymous says:

    “Two weeks after the Euros…”
    and still no sign of a democratic referendum on the horizon. Might as well be a citizen in an EU controlled sector of Ukraine. Could it possibly be that whoever said:” If voting changed anything it would be prevented”, was on to something?

  32. 32
    Peach says:

    My mother was my heroin x

  33. 33
    Anonymous says:

    Clarkson was / is very close to standing for UKIP.

    He would be very popular and a disaster for the Tories.

    Hence massive effort by the BBC and MSM to discredit him as a racist… before he can stand.

    Dangerous stuff.

  34. 34
    None of the above says:

    Jeremy Paxman is looking for a new challenge…

  35. 35
    @hateliebour says:

    Seems Camorons Conservatives may not have lost any MP to UKIP but they are haemorrhaging them, next thing we will know the Libcraps will be in charge, oh they already are, Camoron passed responsibility and ru(i)nning of the country the them.

  36. 36
    Anonymous says:

    The only question is are you paid by CCHQ, the EU or the BBC to troll ?

  37. 37
    None of the above says:

    If it is possible to organise a by election in under 5 weeks it is possible to organise a general election in the same sort of time. With an in-out referendum on Europe on the same day.

  38. 38
    Gawd Help Us says:

    If you could help with a 120% of the turnout that might clinch it.

  39. 39
    Not Sure says:

    Oh ok – Farage thought he could win but didn’t go for it because he just couldn’t be bothered. Is that how it worked?

  40. 40
    No worries says:

    The local UKIP candidate will win it.

  41. 41
    Deviant says:

    Why does the Virgin add at the top of the Telegraph home page feature a huge red cock?

  42. 42
    see how the scam unfolds says:

    How many postal votes were used in Newark last time out? Be interesting to make a comparison with this time.

  43. 43
    Jacqueline Dromey says:

  44. 44
    @hateliebour says:

    Until the day the get in, Green taxes, petrol, cigarettes, energy, low wage tax, vat will shoot up, welfare cuts, bedroom tax cheaper rents, dream on, you voted us out in 2010, our turn to get our own back, piss off, your not in a union suffer, all we end up with is more Liebour multimillionaires .

  45. 45
    Raving Loon says:

    I normally find Dan Hodges blog quite insightful. However, is it me, or does he have a blind spot when it comes to UKIP?

  46. 46
    Guy News Room says:

    Assume Gerry Adams will be resigning in a matter of days. Charges or not.

  47. 47
    We will spend your money on the feckless Party says:

    Although I am a gimp I know from the Imbecile and Princess Toni how to be elected. It’s not rocket science you know.

    Yes vote Ned.

  48. 48

    A minister in the Socialist Republic of Vietnam in the 1980s said rent controls there led to poor housing standards and did more damage to Hanoi than American bombs.
    In Venezuela, rent controls imposed in December 2012 have failed to combat rising inflation which hit 39.6 per cent in June.
    In New York, rent controls are blamed for reducing the city’s housing supply. Varying degrees of control over rent operated on and off in Britain from the First World War until the 1980s.
    Official figures show they contributed to the private rented sector shrinking from 55 per cent of households in 1939 to 8 per cent in the late 1980s.
    Jack Dromey and his wife Harriet Harman own at least two large homes, including one in Herne Hill, South London.

  49. 49
    Will H says:

    Dangling, swaying in the sea breeze on the coast of Dundalk

  50. 50
    Ab Dull the wives beater says:

    Will usual paying please, as we say ten pence for vote like mr b likes.

  51. 51
    J Edgar Dyson says:

    He is a leftie.

    An educated one. With some wit. And logic. And revulsion against Brownianism.

    But he is still a leftie.

  52. 52
    Sal E Bercow says:

    I like boring erections *licks eyebrows*

  53. 53
    Twitter says:

    #LeonBrittan Day on 3 May

  54. 54
    Cameron's dribbling spaddo says:

    Hey, did you hear about the reason there is going to be a by-election in Newark?

    The Tory MP had to be removed because he is corrupt.

  55. 55
    BBC Stazi liaison officer says:

    That’s it m’boy!

    Keep the smears coming – the cheque is in the post.

  56. 56
    Bus pass Elvis says:


    I’d like to thank the good and gracious people of Newark for helping me beat the corrupt and mendacious tories into 7th place.

  57. 57
    Well 'Ard Labour says:

    Free money!
    Getcha free money here!
    Anyone who doesn’t vote for us is a xenophobe!
    Anyone who doesn’t vote for us is a homoophobe!
    Anyone who doesn’t vote for us is a racist!
    Anyone who doesn’t vote for us is a nazi!
    Anyone who doesn’t vote for us wears women’s knickers!

  58. 58
    thostids says:

    They’re supposed to live in Constituency. …..not Bradford!

  59. 59
    Moral bankrupts says:

    His morally bankrupt supporters, ie the majority of the Catholic vote, will cheer him to the rafters no matter which way it pans out

  60. 60
    non taxable pikey says:

    Newark has a very large fixed Gypsy and Travellers Camp. How many postal votes would you like?

  61. 61
    jack Ketch says:

    Minister of transport? No HS2 and six lane motorways with three lanes with no speed limits reserved for Ferraris, Porsches and Bugatti Veyrons?

  62. 62
    catesby says:

    Forget about Newark! Let’s just concentrate on the forthcoming elections and build from there.

  63. 63
    El Sid says:

    The white flag option would be to hold it two weeks later, in the middle of the World Cup when the media would only care about the England v Uruguay game. The 5 June shows a bit of confidence at CCHQ.

  64. 64
    broderick crawford says:



  65. 65
    (That's enough Eds, Ed!) says:

    Dead right, F F!

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