April 17th, 2014

Austin Mitchell Resignation Confirms Guido Story, Despite Denial
Guardian Scrub Report of Miliband Seat Stitch Up From Website

Labour’s Austin Mitchell has announced via YouTube that he is standing down in 2015. However, this was well known after Guido revealed it was on the cards in the Sun back in January. At the time Mitchell said:

With a more lucid quote given to the local press:

“There is no truth in it. I haven’t said anything to anyone about stepping down. That will be decided by me and the local party which will meet to discuss it and nothing will be done or decided until then. I don’t know who has been shouting their mouth off. It could be an attempt to try to discredit the unions, but I am totally mystified. Meanwhile, I am getting better and am feeling younger and more vigorous.”

Bizarrely the original Guardian report about Mitchell’s announcement, published at 19.48 last night, included details of how Labour and the unions are stitching up the seat for former Miliband apparatchik Melanie Onn. By 21.10 history had been re-written and the intrigue had disappeared from the Guardian’s website. Regular readers will remember that Guido also revealed the details of this plot back at the beginning of the year:

“Austin Mitchell isn’t going to be running again in Grimsby and all the stops are being pulled out to secure the seat for former Labour HQ staffer Melanie Onn. Miraculously Onn was given a cosy regional campaigning role with Unison. Labour insiders say she got the gig at Ed’s personal request. That must be Ed’s promised ‘new, more open politics’ in action.”

So who got on the blower to shut that one down?


  1. 1
    Podiceps says:

    So is Melanie still Onn?

  2. 2
    Revd. Phoney £rd fuckin Way B£iar, Sanctimonious Shit and £iar, emoting and wiv stupid grin says:

    You’d never catch me revealing my plans

  3. 3
    Táxpáyér says:

    Article was memory holed, no wonder the grauniad is the paper of choice for AlBeeb.

  4. 4
    Chris Bryant's sentient ANUS says:

    I do hope some smug, upper middle class wankstain gets the seat

    Someone who really knows the issues on the ground, and can interact effectively with the aspirations of the citizens: namely i wants a bigger council ouse, i wants more benefits, i wants more tax credits, i wants more fruits of other people’s hard work.

    Give it to Eddie Izzard

  5. 5
    Gordon McBonkers says:

    It’s no easy life being an MP. Sometimes you have to turn up in Parliament once, even twice, a year.

    Sent from my Nokia using Smashphone.

  6. 6
    Lard Presclott of Chipolata-upon-Tracey-Temple says:

    Eeh, it’s Grimsby oop north, int’it. And I never did push Austin’s wife, Linda McDougall, up against a wall neither and I never did put me ‘and oop ‘er skirt like when she opened her front door to me the first time we met in 1978, oh no sirree, definitely not, I’m not known as a horny handed son of toil for nothing, and would Sir like some more gin in that? And why ‘asn’t this prime seat been offered to my lad? ‘As no one ‘eard of the he-he-he-predatory principle?

    P.S. Pauline’s getting a bit bored of them mock Tudor beams wot you taxpayers paid for – does anyone want ‘em? All reasonable offers considered, cash only mind.

  7. 7
    Len McCluskey says:

    Ed’s my bitch.

  8. 8
    Braintree, not Basildon, Bond says:

    News on all tv channels…

    Four million imported assorted multicoloured wuzzyfuzies, packers, injuns, wo*ggles, spicckles etc all of ripe breeding age blah blah …

    … and now four years later there are not enough primary school places to accommodate them all all.

    Now HTF did that happen?

  9. 9
    Fucking dis custard says:

    No she’s gone off

  10. 10
    Simply Len says:

    Do the right thing Ed

  11. 11
    non taxable pikey says:

    Credit where credit is due. Nice one Guido.
    These fkrs just keep digging themselves deeper into the mire

  12. 12
    Urethra Franklin says:

    Gordon McMong seemed to think that they’d come here and not breed like rabbits despite all the evidence to the contrary. There’s an irony, though not a delicious one, that we pay them to outbreed us in our own country. If emigrating made a difference I would go but this suicidal policy of national destruction will follow me wherever I end up.

  13. 13
    a non says:

    You been upsetting anybody recently Guido?

    Attempting to reach the lower link -“Regular readers will remember that Guido also revealed the details of this plot back at the beginning of the year:”- Firefox delivers a warning that ‘order-order’ is not to to be trusted and a potential threat to anyone entering the site. ;)

    Big brother and associated giant rats seem to be gunning for you……..

  14. 14
    Tony Benn says:

    Oh FFS all the main parties seats are rigged.

  15. 15
    a non says:

    Internet explorer giving the same message!!!!!

  16. 16
    tories are the nazi party says:




  17. 17
    New World says:

    Socialism and capitalism are the same they both run out of your money to steal.

  18. 18
    Wonderful says:

    Muslim immigrant, given free ivf treatment, required emergency hospital procedure…couldn’t speak a word of English, translator brought in at hospital expense, demanded her head be covered when she came round in recovery, caused scene when nurse refused given it was interfering with her work.

    At a hospital in the UK, the other morning … And you paid for it all

  19. 19
    Shooty* says:

    He’s not killing enough of them

  20. 20
    Shooty* says:

    WHoops. My bad. Misread your post. Didn’t see you alleged he killed disabled people. Thought you were talking about wars in “peaceful” parts of the world. Apologies.

  21. 21
    Old Nick Heavenly (alive and kikin) says:

    It’s called mining!

  22. 22
    Old Nick Heavenly (alive and kikin) says:

    cannot get through to jsmineset either

  23. 23
    Old Nick Heavenly (alive and kikin) says:

    or expenses

  24. 24
    Ukrainian Army says:

    Ve are shit.

  25. 25
    H Harmskids says:

    Is it an all women list except for male members of PIE?.

  26. 26
    Hit & Run says:


  27. 27
    Falkirk to Grimsby says:

    The mask slips.

    First it was Jack Dromey winning an “all women shortlist”. Then we saw the Falkirk fiasco. Now it’s the Grimsby parachute. Labour are rigging seats for Miliband’s union cronies.

  28. 28
    Old Nick Heavenly (alive and kikin) says:

    You are a disgrace.

    Don’t you know that you are the last bastion of democracy

    your job is to fuck up Russia and the EU completely

  29. 29
    Village Idiot says:

    …..Cameron and God;…Had his actions in government applied the Christian rule book, I might start to believe he is sincere,but, the way some sections of our society have been treated,(sick,disabled,elderly),compared to the way other sections of society are treated,(same -sex marriage,human rights for bad people), makes me question this convenient God fearing stuff!
    ….Or is it an attack on UKIP?….They tried R4,then R5, and,The Times ,and M.Parris,and failed spectacularly,nearly exposing the allowances of the EU politicians,but they quickly stopped digging,or so it seemed!
    ….If Cameron has found his “Conscience”,then good,but he is still wedded to the repugnant EU!….IMHO

  30. 30
    RED LEN says:


  31. 31
    Lord Stansted says:

    Melanie Onn. With a name like that, she’ll do well “up North”. She sounds a right champion lass.

  32. 32
    The Mirror says:

    Today we’ll be running a photo from Schindler’s List in a story about the bedroom tax.

  33. 33
    Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:


  34. 34
    Labour always revert to type says:

    He does have a plan: high taxes, bumper welfare payments, more debt, reckless waste and bungs to his union pals and blank cheques for his mates like Rev Flowers.

    He’s done it before and he’ll do it again.

  35. 35
    Lord Stansted says:

    Concentrate on the last one.

  36. 36
    Pookie snackumberger says:

    Here you are Labour voters; a potential chancellor of Great Britain and all he can do is make silly immature hand gestures.

    We saw him in speaking mode when he tried to respond to Osborne’s budget speech, at which he failed miserably.

  37. 37
    Grimsby pie says:

    I smell fish.

  38. 38
    Lord Stansted says:

    Cameron doesn’t seem to have read the 1662 Book of Common Prayer on the purpose of Marriage.

  39. 39
    nazis are us (tory party) says:

    just how much mileage is Cameron trying to get out of his dead son?
    is this man any sort of human being?
    the man who claimed DLA and is now denying it to others by appealing to the far right pseudo-religious cnunts of the tory party

  40. 40
    Old Nick Heavenly (alive and kikin) says:

    nose… spite… face.

  41. 41
    Old Nick Heavenly (alive and kikin) says:

    St Tony and St Dave

    the heirs to Jesus the Christ.

  42. 42
    Old Nick Heavenly (alive and kikin) says:

    The Blessed Margret looks down from Heaven and blesses them with Bountiful grace!

  43. 43
    David Cameron,Bumsex Champion says:

    Owen Jones,just heard about your appalling ordeal at the hands of the state. Hope you and family are OK in these Macarthyite times for Muslims.

  44. 44
    Votes wanted, we promise we will lie our heads off says:

    I thought Bliars son was going to be MP for Bootle, sorry he will be the the hopeful MP for Liebour at Bootle in 2015 elections

  45. 45
    Bosun Higgs says:

    My grandfather used to drive an Austin Mitchell. It could do U-turns.

  46. 46
    Vlad the Loudhailer says:

    Car Crash Balls!!

  47. 47
    Maria Miller says:

    Just watched a fight between a blind guy, a deaf guy and mute. I love senseless violence.

  48. 48
    Fruitcake, swivel eyed loon, closet racist and proud of it says:

    Cameron puts religion back into politics.

    Farage puts the fear of God into Cameron.

  49. 49
    Votes wanted, we promise we will lie our heads off says:

    Life, mass immigration, EU and voting for the LibLabCon merchants lies is now having real consequences for the ordinary pleb families of this tired ,open doors, beautiful full up country, it will get worse before it gets totally beyond worse.

  50. 50
    Anonymous says:

  51. 51
    Votes wanted, we promise we will lie our heads off says:

    Prefer them to be blessed with Jail sentences.

  52. 52
    C O (Ξ7q1) says:

    This is perhaps one of the most schizophrenic weeks on this blog.

    Pilloried for being anti-UKIP M’doch placemen the other day – even Europhiles on Twitter, the team not only touch down on a slow burning story from a few months ago, but are rightfully hoisting St Ella of Creasy upon the biscuity-petard of expenses shame, comprehensively called out seriously bad reporting twice and confirmed some mutually good news for the Tony G, the DM and DM readers.

    I hear that P’rivate E’ye have a breaking exclusive about some guy who is about to get nailed to a cross by Pilate.

  53. 53
    Donald Unpleasance says:

    Grimsby Gash

  54. 54
    Toxic Tories for Landowning Spongers, Parasites, Criminals, Expenses Fraudsters, Traitors, Peedos, & says:

    In my view, Cameron is a vacuous chancer who will cling on to any passing piece of flotsam in the hope that it will keep him afloat long enough for one more decent headline in the Daily Mail. That he now poses as a man of principle, given all the evidence to the contrary, is so risible it’s laughable. It’s a bit late now to try and form the English Tea Party – a sort of Afternoon Tea Party – to save him at this year’s European elections and next year’s General Election. Frankly, I don’t believe a word he says in this article. This is the same man who touted the huge lie, “No more top down re-organisation of the NHS” at the last election. Why should anyone believe a single word he says about anything ever again?

  55. 55
    Henry Crun says:

    Or the Chilcott report

  56. 56
    ukip if you want to but ... says:

    In an attempt to portray the Times’s investigation of Nigel Farage’s EU allowances as part of a sinister establishment plot, UKIP yesterday published a series of disparaging profiles of some of the paper’s senior journalists (Daniel Finkelstein, Matthew Parris, Alice Thomson, Hugo Rifkind, Rachel Sylvester, Tim Montgomerie and Alexi Mostrous).

    It drew particular attention to the fact that six of the seven were privately educated, an odd line of attack given that its leader was schooled at the none-too-shabby Dulwich College. And Farage isn’t the only senior Ukip figure to have passed through the nefarious public school system.

    Two of the party’s other MEPs, Stuart Agnew and William Legge, were educated at Gordonstoun and Eton respectively. In addition, all three of its peers were privately schooled (Eton, Stowe and Institut Le Rosey), its treasurer, Stuart Wheeler, is another Old Etonian and its defence spokesman, Alexander Fermor-Hesketh, was educated at Ampleforth College.

    As I said, a dubious line of attack indeed.

    Here’s the full list.

    Nigel Farage (Leader): Dulwich College

    Stuart Wheeler (Treasurer): Eton College

    Alexander Fermor-Hesketh (Defence Spokesman): Ampleforth College

    Stuart Agnew (MEP): Gordonstoun School

    William Legge (MEP): Eton College

    Lord Stevens (Peer): Stowe School

    Lord Pearson (Peer): Eton College

    Lord Willoughby de Broke (Peer): Institut Le Rosey

  57. 57
    Ed Miliband says:

    I jumped on the religious bandwagon first. He’s just copying me!

  58. 58
    Anonymous says:

    So What ??

  59. 59
    C O (Ξ7q1) says:

    U’kraine need to kick off a seriously nasty guerilla war and use the terrain to your advantage.

    Tying up any insurgent troops this way will get the kind of negative publicity required for the international community to seriously lean on R’ussia, and the ensuing sectarian bloodshed will help forge the nation state which it claims to be.

    Look at the muzzers in A’fghanistan: They beat the USSR when it was much stronger. Light arms, absolute faith and counter-insurgent tactics are all you need.

    If U’kraine can’t be bothered, the least they should do is blow the nuke plants, gas / oil infrastructure, and things like bridges and arms factories as possible. No point in making it too easy for P’utin.

    Just keep it within your own borders.

  60. 60
    Ed Miliband says:

    That’s just not funny!

  61. 61
    Donald Unpleasance says:

    Cammers must be on the rack if he plays the god card.

  62. 62
    Poor Tom says:

    So your point is ?

  63. 63
    Not The Nine O'clock News says:

    According to the latest opinion poll, 10% of Britain is giving Ed Balls’s economic policy the thumbs up.

    The other 90% are using a different finger.

  64. 64
    C O (Ξ7q1) says:

    Has the odour of Blair, almost.

  65. 65
    Votes wanted, we promise we will lie our heads off says:

    The sun can shine out of Farages arse and he can walk on water, start a war, create a new religion and hang all British MPs on the HOC lamp-posts so long he and his mates can be used by the people of this country to get us out of the EU, we can complain afterwards when we are free from the yoke of the corrupt EU, we could even think of putting a statue up of Farage if he wants.

  66. 66
    Not The Nine O'clock News says:


  67. 67
    BBC version says:

    According to the latest opinion poll, 10% of Britain is giving Ed Balls’s economic policy a passionate thumbs up.

    The other 90% were unavailable..

  68. 68
    Lord Stansted says:

    It looks as if UKIP is getting to you. Worried are you?

  69. 69
    The Growler says:

    You are in Con-land so you say orf

  70. 70
    Norman Normal says:

    People in the south call us Northern Monkeys which isn’t very nice.

    I just wish many of my kith an kin would not try so hard to earn the name.

  71. 71
    Sue Denim says:

    Just change the “https” to “http”.

  72. 72
    Ah! Great Idea says:

    Pensioners to be given advice on how long they will live
    Steve Webb, the pensions minister, says Government wants to provide pensioners with rough life expectancy guide to allow them to make better financial decisions.

    So ” You’ve only got 10 to go”

    30 years later when they’re absolutely broke……and waiting and worrying if today’s the day

  73. 73
    Len Mc says:

    Good Riddance to him and his wife Linda McDougall tossers of the first order.

  74. 74
    Norman Normal says:

    If you think the main BBC news is bad, check out the local Beeb regional news program Look North.

    It’s more of a shameless labour propaganda machine and is never challenged. It often sings the same tune as the Mirror.

  75. 75
    M­a­­­­q­bo­­ul says:

    That works a treat.

  76. 76
    M­a­­­­q­bo­­ul says:

    The terrain is flat, flat, flat. How can that be used to advantage by guerillas?

  77. 77
    Ockham's Razor says:

    He probably does not even know the day he was born on. Twat.

    How many haircut styles will those pensioners be allowed to choose from?

  78. 78
    M­a­­­­q­bo­­ul says:

    The other 90% were at work.

  79. 79
    Votes wanted, we promise we will lie our heads off says:

    It’s obvious he’s bored out of his tiny brain doing his none job and he’s looking for something to do, too many uncivil servants and SPADs doing the thinking for these so called peers of intelligence and hope.

  80. 80
    Grimsby Docks says:

    Another cυnt.

  81. 81
    Sid says:

    Melanie Onn

    Mel Onn



    Oooh matron!

  82. 82
    PDubya says:

    Speaking of bad news per se from the BBC who on earth decided that bumboy porno finnish stamps should be a topical subject for the Today programme. Evan Davis & the BBC are really scraping the bottom of the barrel if they consider this newsworthy.

  83. 83
    Norman Normal says:

    People are superstitious about the intelligent and well educated. They think there is some sort of witch craft at work and want to burn them.

  84. 84
    Anonymous says:

    Ed Balls : I plead guilty to causing a car crash, m’lud.

    Judge : Do you mean the British econamy Mr Balls?

  85. 85
    The Growler says:

    This sort of thing should be stopped, if she is a local lass fair enough but if not should not be allowed. The Cons are just as bad as Liebore as regards parachuting their chosen ones into jobbies for life constituencies and Lib Dems would love to do it but they do not have a great enough safe seats (maybe even less after the GE), local parties do not like it as they feel their own choices have been over looked. This is not democracy (demos means people) it’s almost the equivalent of the old soviet system where the party decided who could and could not stand as a representative. A form of PR would have been a move away from the jobbies for life constituencies UKip would stand a much better chance in a PR system and they could really box the ears of the 2 main parties. Cameron and Milliband are frightened by the thought of proportional representation, things start becoming more uncertain and unpredictable, and they would have to listen to the populace, and listen to ordinary people instead of lobby groups who are pushing their own agenda to gain some sort of advantage.

  86. 86
    Gordon's 2.5bn Coop Joke says:

  87. 87
    The Growler says:

    I wondered how long it would be before someone played with her name , steady there, a similar thought had past through my mind.

  88. 88
    Red Dick says:

    An Onn Hunt.

  89. 89
    Red Dick says:

    An Onn c’unt.

  90. 90
    Ed Balls says:

    Another leftie wanker.

  91. 91
    Knobcheese in Tenerife says:

    I’ve already got the gay vote. Now I think I’ll try for the Christian vote.

  92. 92
    Blog Stalker says:

    ** endless comments about bumsex **

  93. 93
    The Growler says:

    Norm, Calendar on the other channel (Yorkshire for the ignorant southerners) seemed to be the same, Austin Mitchell was the co presenter.

  94. 94
    Terry Butcher says:

    Lets all go to Africa and evict the indigenous population, like they are doing here and take over the continent and make it into a paradise that the current populace cant. But of course make sure there isn’t any reverse immigration.

  95. 95
    Pick litter for bennies says:

    Most brought in by Labour to ” rub the noses of the right in diversity”.Sadly it had the opposite effect(law of unintended consequences in full flow) by “rubbing the noses of the working man in cheap labour”.Generally, the Labour core vote suffered most so schadenfreude would be the order of the day if it wasn’t so tragic.

  96. 96
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Too true.

    I got duffed up once by someone because they took me to be well educated. The fact is that I hardly passed any exams, did not go to university but never stopped learning or reading since I left school.

    Just the appearance of having knowledge is hated by some.

  97. 97
    The Growler says:

    Socialism wants to mine your money and the capitalists want your money but do it less obviously, they make it easier for their pals in big business and finance to minme your money, they then then get the backhanders (donations) the only trouble Liebore went down that route until it all went wrong.

  98. 98
    Lamborghini driving pensioner says:


  99. 99
    Ali Acbar says:

    No he will be the MP the postal votes have already been cast.

  100. 100
    Fucking dis custard says:

    Fuck me! They have just given me 15 minutes. Better put the kettle on to make a nice cup of tea, and then go and have my last shag

  101. 101
    Mr Tatchell says:

    Good hey, all toosers together.

  102. 102
    Anonymous says:

    “Firey pants.”
    Nil emanated miasma, sans conflagration?

  103. 103
    Short of money says:

    Guido, stop putting links to pay per view newspapers please.

  104. 104
    Anonymous says:

    Well spotted. I loathe Dave with a passion but UKIP would have been better emphasising the cosy, incestuous relationship between Dave and his muckers in the press like the Fink, Parris (and his ex Guardian, Dave speech writer, lover. Julian Glover), Toby Young etc rather than harping on about their schooling. Makes them sound both petty and stupid for being unaware of the beam in their own eye. But then again hardly surprising if there’s a cabal of public school wankers at the top of UKIP as well.

  105. 105
    Former Naval Person says:

    Not only would the Lib Dems love to do it – but clearly they are busy doing it down in Portsmouth. Handy is a dead duck – but the Lib Dems have done a deal with him that will let him run as an ‘Independent’ in the Local Elections unopposed by the local Lib Dems. He will not be a Lib Dem candidate at the General Election but would be crazy not to run as an Independent just for the payoff and pension that he gets after losing his seat. Meanwhile Council Leader Gerald Vernon Jackson is busy raising his profile with all assistance from the local press to take over at the earliest opportunity as Lib Dem candidate for Portsmouth South.

  106. 106
    LLC Out says:

    No Judge….I meant the economy.

  107. 107
    Fred the pensioner says:

    You are like me mate. Reasonably well educated – with a few gaps here and there and a head full of general knowledge and trivia. The only thing I am useful for (apart from buying the grandkids an ice cream every now and then) is to usually be on the winning team at the pub quiz nights.

  108. 108
    Fred the pensioner says:

    In my case, just a quick polish on the top please!

  109. 109
    Idon'tneednodoctor says:

    One Union Nation from Commissar Ed Miliband.

  110. 110
    The Great British Public says:

    Don’t worry, we don’t believe a word he says.

    As the poster above said:

    Farage has put the fear of God into cameron…

    So very true.

  111. 111
    The Great British Public says:

    Either way Cameron smells of chicken shit.

  112. 112
    Anonymous says:

    Your post is too long and boring..


  113. 113
    Anonymous says:

    The LibLabCon hate pensioners (too expensive) and hate educated members of the public…

    I’d say you’re fcuked either way.

  114. 114
    Anonymous says:

    At least when he became an MP we didn’T have to see the idiot on YTV

  115. 115
    Ned Ludd says:

    Is ‘when she opened her front door to me’ to be regarded as a euphemism?

  116. 116
    Unexpected item in bagging area says:

    Lie down?

  117. 117
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Yes a very odd week indeed – i concur. But the rupe fuck up – gets the:

    ‘Bandwagon’ of the week award for flatulence.

  118. 118
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Anony – this is an interesting set of comments. May i correct you just a little on your piece at 11:21 ‘Self educated’.

    To others on this string – Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely – something that is plainly evident from the LibLabCon and their journo / msm mates.

    It’s looking more and more like 1989 in East Gremany – when the collective of political powers fell because of their collective of fraud, criminality and corruption. Bring it on.

Seen Elsewhere

Javid: Let Tories Campaign For Out Vote | House
Ministry of Justice Loses Death Inquiry Data “In the Post” | TechnoGuido
Europe’s Crisis is Cameron’s Opportunity | Speccie
Sajid Javid is the Ultimate Thatcherite | Buzzfeed
Ed Argar Selected in Dorrell Seat | Leicester Mercury
88% of New Labour MPs Are Union Bods | Mark Wallace
Massively Popular Porn Site is Infecting Users | Techno Guido
Newspapers No Longer Willing to Toe Party Line | Roy Greenslade
Introducing the New CapX | CapX
Burnham’s Newsnight Debacle Dissected | Dan Hodges
How I Survived Dry January | Nigel Farage

Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS

Dan Hodges on Labour unity

“We’ve heard a lot over the past few years about how Miliband has united Labour. But he has not united Labour. He has pacified Labour. He has placed it into a medically induced coma following the trauma of the party’s 2010 defeat.”

Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:


AddThis Feed Button

Guido Reads

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,716 other followers