April 10th, 2014

Watch Evans Statement: No “Celebration or Euphoria”

“I’ve gone through 11 months of hell.

I’ve not been alone. Many have walked with me, including my team at Clitheroe and Westminster, my constituency association, my family, my friends, my constituents, and indeed many people who I don’t even know have sent messages of support.

In my darkest and loneliest, there were only two, or one, set of footprints in the sand.

And those of you of faith will know they weren’t mine.

The fact is I have got work to do. It’s the work that I have done for the last 22 years.

So this isn’t a time for celebration or euphoria.

Bill Roache just a few weeks ago from this very spot said there are no winners in these cases and that’s absolutely right.

There are no winners. So no celebrations.

And the fact is I’ve got work to do, work that I’ve done for the last 22 years.

All I can say is that after the last 11 months that I’ve gone through nothing will ever be the same again.”


  1. 1
    Big T says:

    Do the right thing, Nigel.

  2. 2
    Insane Bolt says:

    The HOC ought to be run like big brother – subject to a weekly public vote, the least favored out on their arse – at the rate of one or two a week.

  3. 3
    Maria Miller says:

    Prime Minister forced to deny the sun revolves around the Earth.

  4. 4
    Lord Jensen Interceptor says:

    More bad news.

  5. 5
    Labour is the nasty party. says:

    It was a wonder that Miliband never jumped on this bandwagon and called
    for his resignation .

  6. 6
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Oh, do fuck off out of pub(l)ic life, you self-absorbed arse.

  7. 7
    Labour is the nasty party. says:

    I hope that he gets his job back. He was an excellent deputy speaker.

  8. 8
    FrankFisher says:

    He’s gone all Shackleton now. There was no buggery in the James Caird.

    Or at least, if there was, it’s not in the diaries.

  9. 9
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Really! What a massive cock up!

  10. 10
    An important tweet says:

  11. 11
    Owen Jones says:

    Nigel Evans will be in Strangers Bar celebrating tonight if anyone wants to join him.

  12. 12
    dai flogging says:

    and with vigour!

  13. 13
    Mark wouters says:

    sovietsalami here,
    leeds city council are in the process of having me evicted ,as they’ve colluded with the dwp to stop my benefits and heap unpayable debt upon me because theyre control freaks and think that they can manipulate and control me by doing this to me ,I don’t have an income except for jsa,i want to go abroad and never return to this CORRUPT cunrty,the establishment is ETHNICALLY EAN ECONOMICALLY CLEANSING the british population ,and behind the council and dwp are the POLICE.

  14. 14
    Ockham's Razor says:

    Will you be right behind him?

  15. 15
    dAI WONDERING says:

    perhaps that’s what is being arranged – as revenge for?

    orchestrated by?

  16. 16
    Ellie-Mae (9) says:

    Watch that Shapps geezer Fabbers, he’ll be round to delete your account.

  17. 17
    Ockham's Razor says:

    He should enjoy a massive upswing in support.

  18. 18
    Big Bad John says:

    I found him biased, shouty, pompous and tiresome.

    Oh, wait! That was me!

  19. 19
    Ellie-Mae (9) says:

    define “join” Owen

  20. 20
    Ed Balls says:

    Thanks for that Yvette – now get back to the dishes!

  21. 21
    Scott of the antartic says:

    It was the Wilson governments of the 60’s that tried to imply we were all bumming our way across the ice. All male Victorian values you see. The feminazis really didn’t like it.

    And the fact it was called the south POLE instead of south MINGE got on their tits too.

  22. 22
    Norman Normal says:

    I hear the CPS will prosecute themselves for putting their hands down their own trousers.

  23. 23
    The two muppets. says:

    He was waiting for him to be convicted and then he could jump on with two feet.

  24. 24
    Lord Stansted says:

    +1 WTF is his team? Idiot.

  25. 25
    Mr Woy says:

    Or underneath?

  26. 26
    moleykins says:

    It was pretty obvious from early on he would be acquitted – especially after that one who said that he hadn’t complained, struggled or in any way indicated his unwillingness to do whatever they were doing.

    I wouldnt say he came out of it that well, though. All that hands down the trousers stuff. Bit unsavoury. Reminds me of my prep school Latin master, giving me a bit of extra coaching

  27. 27
    Ockham's Razor says:

    He sounds like one of the most active members in the House.

  28. 28
    Yvette Cooper says:

    Down’t youwse be tellin’ me wor tae dow, chuck.
    I’ll please meself, like.

  29. 29
    Roger says:

    What is that saying about smoke and fire???

  30. 30
    moleykins says:

    cheerio. I’m sure you’ll be sorely missed

  31. 31
    Border Terrier says:

    Please retire Nigel. Nice Welsh village, Brighton but please just leave.

    You are a sad sod.

  32. 32
    omar shariff says:

    will cat become a pillar.
    will it morp.
    when it gets too hot, just swing hanging upside down, or not.
    the heat is in the eye.
    put some ice. or not.

  33. 33
    The BBC says:

    But Labour say….

  34. 34
    Justin Poofy Boots says:

    Media Circus. Nige & his entourage of Dodgy celebrities.

  35. 35
    moleykins says:

    I don’t think anyone including him is denying that he’s a bit of a drunken groper. Apparently that’s OK though, most of the time. Unless it’s a woman being groped of course

  36. 36
    KorryKiddelyFiddelyNation Street. says:

    Nige is Dodgy! He got away with it.

    I hope the real victim gets all the support he can get and try build a life for himself. Poor guy going through all this & no justice!

  37. 37
    Mr Wahay says:

    I’ll be 33″ away (average arm length)

  38. 38
    Big T says:

    Its been quite a fortnight: two shaggers and thief. #3moreUKIPseats

  39. 39
    Ed Ballls says:

    You make me go all wibbly and blinky

  40. 40
    Anonymous says:

    So he is saying Jesus was stalking him?

  41. 41
    TomWatson says:

    The fact is ‘victim statements’ signed sealed and delivered to the CPS by the police clearly stated many did NOT see themselves as victims, merely witnesses.
    But plod and CPS pursued anyway. Another bucket of shit poured over the Great British judicial system.

  42. 42
    neitherdeadnoralive says:

    The Mother Of All Parliaments……… Overflowing with thieves, liars and sexual deviants; oh that it has come to this !!!!!

  43. 43
    Henry RebOOT... says:

    There’s a fillum in this for sure! Comedy gold! The Beeb will cough up development money, that’s a given. But who to play the Trouser Ferret? Kenneth Williams and Frankie Howard, sadly missed. So’s dear old Charles Hawtrey…Looks like a toss-up between Eddie Izzard and Kevin Spacey, if he’s not busy taking his poodle for a walk. Anybody else like going “OOOOOHH!!”?

  44. 44
    The two muppets. says:

    And that is just the Labour party.

  45. 45
    Bob Crow says:

    I’m sure he’d like that. Very much.

  46. 46
    Anonymous says:

    It’s now public record what some of us already knew; that Nigel Evans’ MO is to get utterly pissed and then start grabbing at the genitals of strangers like a nurse in Ayia Napa VD clinic.

    It may have been judged as not criminal but it hardly seems behaviour befitting of a MP.

  47. 47
    A BBC hater says:


  48. 48
    Norma Stitz says:

    Indeed. Not a criminal, just a drunken lecher, so that’s OK, quite suitable to occupy a prominent role in Parliament. Jeez…..

  49. 49
    RSM says:

    Get yer ‘air cut

  50. 50
    The Population Density Stats says:

    Take a few of the recent arrivals with you when you go, there’s a good fellow. We are full.

  51. 51
    The Speaker says:

    Men are supposed to suck it up. So to speak.

  52. 52
    SackMariaMillerasanMP says:

    What do you want? Sexually aggressive MPs, or MPs who rip us off via expenses?

  53. 53
    Moontwats says:

    Well, it actually shows that the ancient system works. He’s been acquitted.
    You can imagine the judge sitting there thinking “WTF !” as the case progessed.

    It’s only because the CPS is populated by the bottom quartiles of the Law Schools and the rozzers can’t get jobs as bouncers ‘cos they’re too thick that it got this far.

  54. 54
    Pick litter for bennies says:

    Mitchell and “Plebgate went t*ts up for plod so did they go after Evans instead for political reasons?.Its the elephant in the room.

  55. 55
    ss says:

    “I’ve gone through 11 months of hell.”
    No worse and even better than having a dick up your arse?

  56. 56
    Anonymous says:

    Not proven rather than not guilty.

  57. 57
    cured lefty says:

    Hopefully he will contain his shit stirring antics

  58. 58
    MB. says:

    What is going on with Lancashire Police and North West CPS?

    Are they on a personal crusade or just like publicity?

    I think they need investifating, not this case but a series of other ones.

  59. 59
    Cliff Richard says:

    “In my darkest and loneliest, there were only two, or one, set of footprints in the sand.”
    “And those of you of faith will know they weren’t mine.”

    What an massive prat.

    There is no need for the man to go to gaol, but his behavious has been unacceptable for an MP – or for anyone.

    Not guilty does not mean he’s not a dirty, arrogant tosser.
    We know he should have been jailed if he’s being doing this to the weaker sex, and that blokes should be able to get stuffed, but it must have be an unpleasant experience to be molested by this creep, and one presumes the seven are the tip orm the iceberg.

  60. 60
    watevva says:

    Yes, whip him!

  61. 61
    An Englishman says:

    “Not proven rather than not guilty.”

    So you have a problem with “Innocent until proven guilty”, do you?

    To my mind it’s a pretty sick legal system that allows the name of the accused to be made public before a guilty verdict, since the taint of the accusation of the innocent is almost as damaging as that of the conviction of the guilty.

  62. 62
    Anonymous says:

    Let him stay and remind Joe Public what a complete sh!thole (no pun intended) parliament is.

    Palace of westminster’s little better than a seedy, smelly urinal on Hampstead Heath.

  63. 63
    Harvey Proctor says:

    Can I do the whipping?

  64. 64
    BigBlackGayCocks.com says:

    So he’s got work to do ,assaulting more young men who are too frightened to give evidence as their political careers will be finished ,disgusting man .

  65. 65
    BigBlackGayCocks.com says:

    How’s the PIE three doing, still looking

  66. 66
    Not in my name says:

    Errors of judgement in relation to drunken adventures and encounters with young males? Oh yes.

    More than that? No.

    Case was weak from the outset and WTF were Plod doing even thinking of trying to force another serving member of parliament into court as a reluctant witness?

  67. 67
    Henry Crun says:

    “Nothing will be the same again”

    No it won’t, perhaps you’ve learnt to keep your hands to yourself.

  68. 68
    Nemesis. says:

    Expenses fiddling and now dirt box player welcomed back and might even get to play at being a whip. The modern Tory party in all its glory – God help us!

  69. 69
    Neitherdeadoralive says:

    Just another reason to vote UKIP, or if you can’t bring yourself to vote UKIP, then vote for an Independent….. Anyone but the LibLabCon !

  70. 70
    Lord Effingham says:

    Let’s face it, you wouldn’t want to drop the soap near any of them would you?

  71. 71
    Wonga says:

    Where he will no doubt grab some knob

  72. 72
    Criminal Protection Service says:

    .. and don’t forget the new female lemon in charge after that corrupt Scotch git was shown the door. Things can only get… worse?

  73. 73

    The pernicious influence of these perverts is now infesting every aspect of life in this country from Parliament , the judiciary ,civil service and industry ,even the police and armed services are no longer immune from their malign filth ,and more worryingly their obscene ,disgusting practices are being propagandised as normal in schools ,even primary schools attended by four and five year old children.
    Every act from the repeal of clause 28 which was designed to protect school children, to gay ‘marriage’ is lauded as an example of progress and enlightenment ,but in reality is step backwards into a degenerate world of filth, disease, and self indulgent, perversions which most people find repellant and unnatural.

  74. 74
    bystander says:

    I agree 100% I wouldn’t want twats like him wandering round parliament if any of my family worked there. He should see a shrink.

  75. 75
    Hugo says:

    He may have faith, but I hope he didn’t ride bare back.

  76. 76
    Nemesis. says:

    You’re quite correct. Only around 10% of the population are homosexual yet from the way things are and the never ceasing flaunting of themselves you would think it’s 90%.

  77. 77
    Peter Carter-Fuck says:

    If you ever fall asleep on Nige’s sofa and wake up with his dick up your arse, you may change your opinion. I couldn’t possible comment.

  78. 78

    Even 10% I am sure is a gross exaggeration !

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