April 7th, 2014

Troughers’ Union: Standards Committee Stuffed with Piggies

It is not just the chairman of the Standards Committee who is a trougher of the highest order. Sir Kevin Pork Barrel is aided and abetted on the troughers’ union by nine other MPs including Tory Christopher Chope, who was exposed during the expenses scandal for charging the taxpayer £881.25 to transport a sofa 85 miles from his second home to his constituency in order to have it reupholstered. Expenses piggy Chope also repaired the roof of his house on the taxpayer at a cost of £10,377, and installed a £2,600 bathroom paid for by us. Not satisfied with his fill, Chope also tops up the family income by employing his wife as his secretary.

Shamed former LibDem armed forces minster Nick Harvey is another member of the committee. Harvey stuck two fingers up at servicemen when he claimed £7 on expenses to attend a Remembrance Service. A furious Royal Navy officer marched up to Harvey and gave him the cash in an envelope in disgustHe only lasted a few more months in the job.

Also on the homework marking committee is Labour MP Alan Whitehead. Whitehead was found by the fees office to have overclaimed for his mortage interest in 2009, submitting a bill for £380 when should have claimed £198.66. Caught with his hand in the till, Whitehead was ordered to make a reduced claim the following month. Not only that, he then made a £89,400 profit when he sold his taxpayer-subsidised London home.

Then there is Tory Paul Beresford, who doubles as a dentist when he isn’t hard at work representing his constituents in Mole Valley. Beresford designated his surgery as his second home, putting three-quarters of the running costs of the property on the taxpayer, a total of £25,627.

Last but not least, Labour MP and people’s champion Tom Clarke designated the posh Sloane Club in Chelsea as his second home, claiming £1,500 a month while in London. Also on the committee is Geoffrey Cox who is not averse to being “overly legalistic” when he banks legal fees of almost £400,000 in outside earnings.

The PM has changed his tune this morning, he now says he is “very open to suggestions” for reforming the Standards Committee. Firing these troughers and bringing in properly independent arbiters to make judgements on allegations against MPs would be a start…


  1. 1
    Owen Jones says:

    What gets me is, where do they get the fuckin “Right honourable” from, they are no where near honourable, they are all lying fucking corrupt fuckin wankers, I wouldn’t piss on any of them if they where on fire…!!
    Fuck the lot of them, fuckin criminals parasites…!!

  2. 2
    Party Remembrancer says:

    To be fair to Chope, he actually employs his secretary as his wife.

  3. 3
    Anonymous says:

    If i did it at my current private sector employer and got found out – they woud fire me, SO WHY NOT the same in Westminster – thieves -

  4. 4
    A Brazilian Rent Boy says:

    You ain’t seen nothing yet fellas !

  5. 5





  6. 6
    Is IDS deluded says:

    From Simon Danczuk article, Spectator today 7 april
    “The Tories talk about welfare quite a lot, but their record is abysmal. Universal Credit is a mess and the Work Programme an expensive failure. Labour understands the value and dignity of work better than any other political party. We have to get people into work that can work, and support those who are unable to work. The Coalition is often doing the opposite – and I’ve seen up close the damage they’re doing”.

    Tories means I D?S?mith. Get a grip Guido.

  7. 7


    Especially the Molar Valley bloke…

  8. 8
    Llareggub says:

    For heaven’s sake, Owen, I do wish you’d stop beating around the bush. Just give it to us straight, in no uncertain terms, exactly what you think off them.

  9. 9
    pissed off tax-payer says:

    The Standards Committee isn’t fit for purpose.

  10. 10
    peeved beyond measure boo-hoo says:

    Errr, Guido, when I wrote a very, very, very similar comment about these piggies last week it was modded.

  11. 11
    Dodgy Dave of Downing St. (would you buy a used car off this man?) says:

    Trust me on this one! – and I think you know me well enough by now!

    Also, my PR (no – that’s not Per Rectum you naughty people!) Skills are second to none.

  12. 12
    c777 says:

    Their “stuffed”.

  13. 13
    HUMAN FILTH says:


  14. 14
    Dave's Brazilian rentboy says:

    Vote for Gays, Global Warming and Gypos.

  15. 15
    Gerbil 7 says:

    So I pay for:
    MPs travel to and from work,
    MPs to buy a house in their name and take any profits when selling,
    the decoration of the house in their name,
    the maintenance of the house in their name,
    the furnishing of the house in their name,
    MPs stationary,
    MPs office costs,
    a chunk of the total cost of food and drink at subsidised bars & restaurants,
    subsistence money,
    Expenses related to their role as an MP,
    MPs time to sit in judgement of other MPs expense claims,
    overseas travel in connection with being a British MP,
    An MPs salary at almost 3 times the average salary.

    Yet ~70% of our laws are made in the EU and still, they wonder why they are despised?

  16. 16
    Fishy Dave at Asda says:

    Round ‘em up, put ‘em in a field, and BOMB THE BASTARDS!

  17. 17
    DING DONG says:


  18. 18
    jgm2 says:

    Bollocks. Labour are only interested in getting people dependent on voting Labour. If that means creating one million cushy office jobs overnight (as in 2001/2) and paying them with borrowed money (2001 – present) then that’s what they’ll do.

    If it means trawling the third world to encourage immigrants to beef up the numbers in their previous Labour strongholds then that’s what they’ll do.

    If it means paying generations of morlocks to stay in post-industrial shitholes moping around in a fugue of handouts, drugs and despondency then that is what they’ll do.

    Labour don’t give a fuck about workers, they don’t give a fuck about anybody. They only care that you vote Labour so that they can keep their fucking noses in the trough.

  19. 19
    Putin says:

    Bomb Westminster!

  20. 20
    P. Doff says:

    A biting comment

  21. 21
    TEIFION says:

    someone look at brian parry jones the chief exec of pembrokeshire county council

  22. 22
    Dave says:

    Don’t forget the EUSSR and a world government. And the circle is squared.

  23. 23
    Corby says:

    Yes, spot on.

    The House of Lords is even worse.

    What is needed is a body independent of MPs and Lords ro review and determine their expenses.

    Flat rate expenses whereby peers can sign in at get an allowance and use it as they wish should be abolised. There should be a a maximum cap per night, but exenses should be based on actuals.

  24. 24
    Maria Miller says:

    Listening to Gloria Gaynor: I will survive.

  25. 25
    Gawd Help Us says:

    On the contrary they have learned a great deal, carry on as we were before very little can happen with us.

  26. 26
    Just passing by says:

    Any proof?????

  27. 27
    It's all Balls says:


  28. 28
    C O (Ξ7n) says:

    No worries, active measures are afoot to correct this:


  29. 29
    P. Doff says:

    Does a limp wrist qualify as proof?

  30. 30
    A cheaper more lingering alternative says:

    No – stake them out in slowly flooding fields in Somerset – not that the poor bastards need any more trash down there.

    And if you say the fields are drying out, – well FCS – find one to flood temporarily – and in the name of ecology you understand – call it a Nature Reserve.

  31. 31
    Ron Barras says:

    Scummers, the lot of them.

    I can see why parliament should have a handful, to represent the benefit fraudsters and corporate crooks. But why is almost every MP on the take?

    Worse, we can do nowt to fix it.

    If I put a brick through their window they’d just expense the glazier.

  32. 32
    Barenness Horseface of Private Plane (she saved Ukraine) says:

    Dave’s my man! OOOOHHHH!!

  33. 33
    Westminster Spin Not Working? says:

  34. 34
    Parasites United says:

    it smells

  35. 35
    Nigel farage says:

    You wont catch me running for a seat over here , This is just the premier league of troughing , you should try it in the EU ,
    You don’t do accounts here oh fuck no , it’s an eat all you want buffet bar & hand the bill to the sucker tax payer .
    then throw your head back & laugh like the 3 musketeers

  36. 36
    IPSA facta says:

    Q E D

  37. 37
    Santa Maria says:

    Today I will be wearing Gucci in my million pound barn conversion. Later on I shall think about the unemployed and those people an low wages, I feel their pain.

  38. 38
    Maria Miller Conservative MP for Basingstoke. Secretary of State for Culture, Media and Sport and M says:

    Q: How do you fix a typewriter with an erection? A: http://lwli.es/jeremy

  39. 39
    All socialists are hypocrites says:

    Correct……Most of the Labour front bench have never had a proper job and have either worked in academia, media,trade union, or Labour Party before entering Parliament. They are mostly millionaires, public school/oxbridge educated and have no idea of “real life” and yet they have the gall to call the Tories posh and out of touch. What a bloody laugh…Hypocrites the lot of ‘em. They don’t give a toss about the “working class” ..they just regard them as gullible easily fooled means to get on to the ministerial gravy train

  40. 40
    Dave from Witney says:

    We are all in this together, Maria

  41. 41
    Good joke says:

  42. 42
    Fishy Dave at Asda says:

    As long as I can bomb them when they are dead!

  43. 43
    Anonymous says:

    Cameron could have avoided this.He should have sacked her.

  44. 44
    Twenty Third of May 2014 the day Labour, Tory and LibDem Parties face reality says:

    Why bother getting elected to Westminster when the 3 main parties are falling over themselves to see if they can out UKIP UKIP

  45. 45
    Garfield says:

    Pembrokeshire you have got to be joking they need to look at the troughers in Carmarthenshire first.

  46. 46
    Tony B££££££££iar says:

    You need to get the UN second vote.

  47. 47
    Prime Minister"The Dunce Of Downing Street" Cameron says:

    I’m just wondering if cyclists should be allowed on airport runways, too.

  48. 48
    C O (Ξ7n) says:

    Perhaps by not sacking her, Cameron’s intention was to lob a few rocks into this predominantly Labour hornets nest.

    Problem is undoubtedly cross party (excluding UKIP) but seems to still be a mainly Labour issue.

    Not that this gets Miller off the hook.

  49. 49
    A cheaper more lingering alternative says:

    Ooooh you are a one . . . . but I like you!!!

  50. 50
    Lord Stansted says:

    Burn MPs and save the planet.

  51. 51
    Garfield says:

    She should not have been selected to stand for parliament in the first place. She is a LAWYER one of the most corrupt professions known to man.

  52. 52
    Sick of them says:

    Very rarely ‘right’ as this farce shows.
    Watch out for the, Independent, Independent committe!!!

  53. 53
    Lord Stansted says:

    The sick joke is that the fuckers at Westminster try to tell us that Russia is corrupt.

  54. 54
    Barreness Horseface of Private Plane (she’s the one who saved Ukraine) says:


    Every year the EUSSR wastes billions!!

    No-one cares –

    and Maria’s is trifling


  55. 55
    Lord Stansted says:


  56. 56
    Anonymous says:

    Independent arbiters ? Why can’t they just follow the same test as the rest of the general public has to do when claiming expenses – wholly, exclusivley and necessarily for the performance of their duties of employment. The HMRC seem independent enough – the rest of us mugs have to put up with them.

  57. 57
    Maria Miller Conservative MP for Basingstoke. Secretary of State for Culture, Media and Sport and M says:

    Police are hunting the ‘knitting needle nutter’ who has stabbed 6 people. They believe he could be following some kind of pattern.

  58. 58
    Check all details says:

    We should be informed as to whether Miller has tried to claim back from the taxpayer any costs for legal services incurred in her lengthy correspondence and obfuscation over this matter.

    I would suspect that, as the parliamentary committee effectively sanctioned her house payment claims, she would argue she was justified in incurring the legal costs to fight her case.

  59. 59
    Gloria Gaynor says:

    Go on now go, walk out the door, just turn around now ’cause you’re not welcome anymore

  60. 60
  61. 61
    The Spineless Lying Twat in Number 10 says:

    I’m ready to make a promise to reform MP’s expenses – but only if you vote for me in 2015. Then I’ll just forget about it. Ha ha – it’s so fucking easy to fool the electorate.

  62. 62
    Standards Committee member says:

    We have standards, very low ones.

  63. 63
    Voter says:

    Why do MPs get all these perks anyway? Is there some sort of shortage of people wanting to be MPs?

  64. 64
    Maria Miller says:

    Up yours Gloria, I will survive.

  65. 65
    Maria says:

    Get out of jail free’ card for shoplifters sends wrong message
    posted 14 Dec 2009 04:18 by Maria Miller [ updated 14 Dec 2009 04:48 ]

    5 October 2006

    Maria has expressed concern at new sentencing rules from a Government quango that could mean shoplifters will never face the threat of jail.

    The Government-appointed Sentencing Guidelines Council is consulting on new guidelines for courts to follow. Under one option, shoplifters will never be jailed unless they commit an ‘aggravated’ offence, such as involving violence or using children. Under the other option, shoplifters would not face any custodial sentence unless they were ‘seriously persistent’.

    Last year, retail crime was estimated to cost businesses £2.1 billion a year, but this figure is thought to under-estimate the full extent, due to under-reporting by shops.

    Maria said,

    “I think the public will be concerned that a Government body is seriously suggesting those who steal from shops should never be jailed. Such a ‘get out of jail free’ card sends the wrong signal to would-be thieves and gives the green light to more crime across Basingstoke. Small firms are the hardest hit by theft, and we all pay the cost in the form of higher prices in shops.

    “Certainly, community sentences or fines may be appropriate for some offenders. But a jail sentence must remain as both a deterrent and a punishment for persistent shoplifters. I fear that the Government’s policy of releasing convicted prisoners early, or not sending them to prison at all, is undermining confidence in our criminal justice system.”

  66. 66
    Biffo says:

    Lock all the exits & set it on fire while they’re all inside making so much noise at the weekly circus aka PMQs that they’ll never notice until it’s too late to escape. Send an email to the very few honorable Honorable Members not to attend PMQs but to spend the day in their constituency.

  67. 67
    Anon. says:

  68. 68
    Nemesis says:

    And to think these fucking porkers are passing judgement on other fucking porkers is just too much. What a disgusting country this has become as far as MPs are concerned. I’ve just heard the twat Cameron saying Miller should be allowed to get on with her job – which one: the job she’s paid to do or the job of fiddling the taxpayers. Vile bitch!

  69. 69
    Anon. says:

  70. 70
    Key additional detail says:

    And they think they’re worth a nearly 10 % pay rise.

    One wonders how big a pay hike they’d push for if they weren’t so mindful of the austerity they proclaim.

  71. 71
    The Critic says:

    Labour also understands the meaning of the terms ‘mess’ and ‘expensive failure’ probably invented by them.

    They just call it something different. So now who’s delusional?

  72. 72
    Vlad the Loudhailer says:

    The rule of law should be applied without favour. This is FRAUD by abuse of their position. Let’s stop playing silly buggers, arrest Miller and the top twenty offenders and put them infront of a jury.

  73. 73
  74. 74
    Biffo says:

    A classic example of ‘do as I say, not as I do’ by a real trougher. If she was on benefits – she’d now be in jail. If she had a real job she’d have been sacked immediately for ‘gross misconduct’. However, as she’s an MP & one of the very few females (allegedly) in the Cabinet – she’s got away with it, will continue to trough & has our Gutless Wonder Dave the Know Nothing PM backing her. Ain’t crime grand if you’re an MP.

  75. 75
    Chillaxing Dave says:

    Anyone seen my kids?

  76. 76
    Apthorpe says:

    That Dave has not sorted this lot out just shows him to be totally inept and out of touch. It really is simple, MPs should follow standard commercial practice for expenses i.e. if you cannot prove that an expense was incurred for your work duties then it is refused. As for allowances for homes near to work then why not follow the existing rules for relocation and travel that us used in the Civil Service?

    There needs to a change in the attitude of MPs who see allowances and expenses as a means to increase their earnings not as an aid to ensure that they are productive in their job.

  77. 77
    Biffo says:

    Not if the British public can help it, Trougher.

  78. 78
    Special Measures says:

    Till you’re ready to kidnap and kill a few of them they will continue. Terror is now the only way. They have very poor levels of security a 7 man snatch team and 3 vehicles would be enough from what I’ve seen. These are not high profile MPs so their security is lax and easy to get round for a well trained team.

    You’ll just moan on the internet though as usual so they are safe to trough.

  79. 79
    domino says:

    In other news Robert Mugabe was due to send a fact finding mission to Westminster to facilitate an increased knowledge of Generally Accepted Accounting (Fraud) Principles.

  80. 80
    Biffo says:

    Whatever he was trying to do all the dumb barsteward has done is act as a recruiting sergeant for Nigel Farage & UKIP – as has Clegg during his ‘debates’ with Farage. I’ll be voting UKIP next month & in 2015 – can he possibly be any worse, do any worse than the bunch we’ve got?

  81. 81
    Anonymous says:

    Guido, You did an excellent job regarding Maria Miller and her troughing. Will you please give your attention to the following troughers and deviants as I am sure they all have something to answer for. I include David Laws, Baroness Uddin,Ed Balls and his missus,David Cameron and Keith Vaz for a start. Take your time but nail them good and proper. My thanks.

  82. 82
    Biffo says:

    Yes, so true. However, we’re never going to get any change about the EUSSR from the current Laughing Boys Camoron, Clegg & Milliband so FIRST we’ve got to clean out the Augean Stable that is the Palace of Westminster. THEN, it’s time to deal with the EUSSR

  83. 83
    JH-230912384590231 says:

    My god, he’s good.

  84. 84
    JH3243262345645 says:

    God, he’s good.

  85. 85
    Biffo says:

    He doesn’t even know what the rules are himself – ‘the independent members of the panel have the casting vote’ ‘erm, erm, oh, I made a mistake actually they’re not allowed to vote at all’.
    And he’s still in there defending Miller – I guess he doesn’t plan on being an MP after 2015 either then?

  86. 86
    Taxpayer says:

    Just make them follow the same rules on expenses as the rest of us. Then tax their income at the highest marginal tax rate the income tax system levies. You’ll soon see Cameron unwed himself from his obsession with high taxes.

  87. 87
    Grimy Miner says:

    lots of poof – sorry, proof.

  88. 88
    Tony Baloney says:

    These people are mere beginners! These peeps need Tax Payers’ Charity, I’ve got my own Charity! It’s mainly set up to help aging War Criminals who conveniently suffer with amnesia, but it also helps out old pals and can sometimes be used to grease palms to get your kids into positions of power. All tax free.

  89. 89
    Inconvenient Truth says:

    You forgot Loo Roll….

  90. 90
    broderick crawford says:

    Does that include the Labour cohort Owen ?

  91. 91
    Inconvenient Truth says:

    They’d like to think so. They ‘talk the talk’, but when it comes to walking, they’re like a kid with rickets or someone who’s used a football as a suppository.

  92. 92
    cured lefty says:

    How is it that common sense blatantly tells you she was at it yet she is still permitted to stay in office …is part of it that she &her hubby are lawyers?

  93. 93
    cured lefty says:

    Can anyone upload george harrisons little piggies I feel it could be millers theme tune

  94. 94
    David Laws LibDem fiddler says:

    Shows the true characters of Clegg and Cameron. You cannot believe a word either says.

  95. 95
    David Laws LibDem fiddler says:

    Olympic village accommodation could be used when not at their home address. No need for so many expenses. A pool of typists and telephonists could also be provided, no need to employ their spouses.

    With over half of our laws coming from the EU cut the number of MPs to 300 at most. Lords could be cut to about150. This gravy train needs to stop. We have more politicians than any other country except China.

  96. 96

    The blueprint for politics for the people is at consensusuk.org. Worth a look ?

  97. 97
  98. 98
    Cinna says:

    Agoraphobic benefits cheat Tracy Johnson now found guilty of falsely claiming almost £50000. She is awaiting sentencing. I wonder if shell get a £5800 fine and be told to apologise to British taxpayers?

  99. 99
    nick says:

    trouble is these MPs DO get it- that is we can get away with it. Miller is a crook- so quit and go lady. Cameron is just as bad- he endorses Mps flagrant expense behaviour. If there is any one incident that sinks the Tories election prospects , it will be the Miller debacle.

  100. 100
    Handycock, Worshipful Master, Libetine Lodge, Portsmouth City Council says:

    I am putting myself forward for election to the Standards Committee. I am sure to get elected as I have a large following in the house and also from Grand Lodge. Boaz.

  101. 101
    Grand Master, Grand Lodge, Great Queen Street says:

    Jahbulon Handy. I and many Brothers are supporting you, by the way I have fixed the Judge for the trial in June. You are truly the Widows son. Jachin.

  102. 102
    Border Terrier says:

    Get a grip Guido.

    UKIP MEPs are the biggest troughers – at least £250,000 per year per MEP for work they don’t (even pretend to) do. Money under false pretences. Charge them

  103. 103
    Handycock, Worshipful Master, Libertine Lodge, Portsmouth City Council says:

    Thanks Grand Master. You always come through for the Brothers. If only the idiot voters and non MP Brothers knew how this country is really run, we could be in real trouble. I am keeping a low profile, as you advised, in my villa in Spain at the moment, kindly bought for me by my Brother boys, the media think I am still in hospital getting the sympathy vote. Hiram Abif wishes you well. Boaz

  104. 104
    Jimmy Savile and Cyril Smiths' Ghosts says:

    Jahbulon Handy, Jachin Grand Master, Boaz fellow Brother Perverts.

  105. 105
    domino says:

    Oh fluck off…how long have the scum in Parliament been at it, since 1670 at least..ooh UKIP MEP’s do it…so what you Hunt, the time for honouring thyself will soon be at an end…hopefully bloody and violently.

  106. 106
    Parliamentary Standards Commissioner says:

    Boaz Handy.

  107. 107
    Chief Constable, Hampshire Constabulary says:

    As you know Handy we have destroyed all the records of your previous interviews with us about the upcoming civil hearing on the vulnerable female constituent you sexually molested. Just like Brother Hogan-Howe did on the Met corruption investigations. Jahbulon.

  108. 108
    Handycock whipping it out says:

    Jahbulon Commissioner.

  109. 109
    Grand Master, Grand Lodge, Great Queen Street says:

    All you fellow Brothers, past and present, make me so proud of you. Jachin.

  110. 110
    Anonymous says:

    let me know when you need the hands

  111. 111
    Anonymous says:

    “Standards Committee Stuffed”
    Who said The Pig Idea, wouldn’t result in a plague on all our sties?

    “The PM has changed his tune this morning, he now says he is “very open to suggestions”
    If you ever want to get real Dave just ask…someone to ask you those questions you’d rather ignore.

  112. 112
    lescrompsblogg says:

    Not the kind of behaviour you’d expect from an ex advertising and oil exec,i mean it’s not as though they have a sense of entitlement in their fucking DNA is it ?

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