March 12th, 2014

PMQs SKETCH: Harriet Harman is Grooming the LibDems

Questions to the Prime Minister weren’t to the Prime Minister, nor were they questions.

Nick Clegg was denounced, castigated, mocked and accused by Harriet Harman, Toby Perkins, Kevin Brennan and many others of crimes against lapdogs, of shameless, spineless capitulation to the Tories, of kicking apprentices in the teeth, evicting widows, starving children, killing constituents, and (worst of the worst) “electoral self-interest” (gasps from a shocked Labour movement).

This wasn’t Harriet Harman “holding the executive to account” this was “grooming”.

This was making sure the Lib Dems know what’s expected of them when Ed Miliband needs a coalition partner after the general election.

They want to be sure that the Libs will spinelessly kick apprentices in the teeth for Labour.

There won’t be a problem.

Clegg counter-denounced Harriet for the mess she’d left behind. The deficit. Bankers. Poverty.

Clegg assumes he will be standing at the same despatch box next year counter-attacking Tories for the mess he and Labour are clearing up (the deficit, bankers, poverty).

But then he’s assuming it will be he who is the kingmaker and not Lord Biro of the Bus Pass Elvis Party who famously thrashed the Libs in Clifton recently.

PS: Peter Bone (still at large and making the most of it) asked about a referendum on EU membership, prompting Clegg to quote David Cameron: ” ‘If you give up powers of the British people you should ask the British people first.’ “ And then Clegg added: “I entirely agree.” Bit late getting to that particular bierkeller. He wasn’t suggesting the British people should have a say on powers when the Single European Act was signed. He wasn’t saying it in the 90s, the 2000s – when *did* he start making these revolutionary sceptic noises?


  1. 1
    Jeffrey Bernard says:

    Clegg was expressing sceptical thoughts in the 2000s:

    Mr. Edward Davey (Kingston and Surbiton) (LD): On a point of order, Mr. Deputy Speaker. Will the Chair reconsider the decision not to select the Liberal Democrat amendment for a referendum on Britain’s membership of the EU? That is the question that goes to the heart of the debate before the House. That is the debate that people want to hear. We are being gagged, Sir.

    Mr. Deputy Speaker (Sir Michael Lord): Order. I understand the hon. Gentleman’s point of order, but having made it he must not go on and start debating the matter. The selection of amendments is made by Mr. Speaker, and is not open for questioning in the House. Hon. Members will have every opportunity to discuss these matters when we embark—[Hon. Members: “When?”] Order. During the course of the debate.

    Mr. Nick Clegg (Sheffield, Hallam) (LD): Further to that point of order, Mr. Deputy Speaker. I share the dismay of my hon. Friend the Member for Kingston and Surbiton (Mr. Davey). What guidance can you give me on how we can secure—if not today, at some point during the remaining stages of the Bill—the opportunity to debate the issue that many Members want debated and many members of the public want debated: our future membership of the EU?

    Simon Hughes (North Southwark and Bermondsey) (LD): On a separate point of order, Mr. Deputy Speaker.

    Mr. Deputy Speaker: If it is a separate point of order, I am prepared to take it.

    Simon Hughes: I have raised procedural questions about the Bill with Mr. Speaker and other occupants of the Chair. I have asked for guidance from Officers of the House on the drafting of amendments that will be selectable—generally, on the Bill, not just on this issue.
    26 Feb 2008 : Column 923
    I have been told that we must see the Clerks. My colleagues have been to see the Clerks and have taken advice from them. They have submitted amendments that the Clerks have told them are in order. Please will you tell me and those other colleagues who have made points of order on the Bill what more we have to do to have a point of order accepted that allows an amendment to be debated in the House on an issue that a quarter of the British people represented here want to be debated and many people regularly tell us ought to be debated? What else do we have to do, because we have followed the rules that we have been given?

  2. 2
    Fuck Labour says:

    Harman is an evil c-unting c-unt of the highest order.

    Now, enjoy this classic performance by Elvis.

  3. 3
    Mitch says:

    Clegg can hardly criticise the actions of a government of which he was the DPM?

  4. 4
    All politics at Westminster says:

    It’s all a load of pish

  5. 5
    Returning officer says:

    Nick Clegg,leader of the fence sitting fuck party.
    2 votes and a spoiled paper…looks like excrement

  6. 6
    J Dromey says:

    It’s my fault. Harriet is just having one of her black c**k day in frustration.

  7. 7
    Vazoline says:

    Maybe I should offer to help out.

  8. 8
    RomaBob.... working hard for you! says:

    Cleggy did quite well……. putting down H.H. …….

  9. 9
    Election observer says:

    That’s a good day for the Liberals.

  10. 10
    Diana Abbott says:

    Late breakfast of egg Benedict this evening.Trying not to get it on my duvet this time.

  11. 11
    Fuck Labour says:


  12. 12
    Mark Oaten says:

    Let me study that spoiled ballot a moment.

  13. 13
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Just wait.

    He’s a Libdem. They have less shame than a Labour MP caught promoting the lowering of the age of consent.

  14. 14
    Nick Clegg says:

    I voz only operating unter orders.

  15. 15 says:

    Well shes probably got previous form in “grooming”.

  16. 16
    Diane Abbot says:

    I have also found a new meal. Right in between Breakfast and Brunch.

  17. 17
    dISEASED bbc aNUS says:

    We all know these Labour shitstains will not require a coalition party on May 2nd, ’15.

    The vast hordes of professional benefits scroungers, public sector paper shufflers, and naturalised immigrants will secure the filth a majority which keeps them in power for a minimum of two terms.

    As in ’97 they will inherit a growing economy, so will of course repeat the process of repaying the vermin who voted for them with huge quantities of both borrowed monies, and that stolen from the hard working, the self reliant, and the risk takers

  18. 18
    Nick Leg says:

    If I get booted out there is always a job as an EU commissar waiting.

  19. 19
    Ask Nick says:

    H Harmskids was on her usual form – crap.

  20. 20
    Jamie Oliver says:


  21. 21
    kebab time says:

    Peado supporting socialist, she ate all the pies!

  22. 22
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Liberal Democrat voting intentions from

    Voted Very strongly for and against an EU referendum
    Voted very strongly for and against more EU powers
    Voted very strongly for and against tuition fees
    Voted very strongly for and against VAT increase
    Voted very strongly for and against …etc

  23. 23
    Nigel Garage says:

    Ultimately Britain can’t be that sexist if a moron like Mad Hattie can almost break through the glass ceiling. Mind you she is very privileged.

  24. 24
    Dodgy D. Laws says:

    Liberal Dimocrats: two-faced, self-serving opportunists, lining their own pockets with taxes levied to ‘save the planet’……

  25. 25
    C.O.Jones says:

    Lol – that is to be expected from a party that has Vince Cable in it.

  26. 26
    Spartacus says:

    anyone noticed the trolls seem to have disappeared in the last day or two?

    eu funding must have run out.

  27. 27
    Spartacus says:

    nothing to see there, move along now . . .

  28. 28
    Bill Quango MP says:

    She is a borderline retard. Even Gordon Brown thought so. And he was only marginally more intelligent than a wasp.

  29. 29
    Spartacus says:

    the dutch use ik not I

  30. 30
    Average Jo says:

    The smears are coming thick and fast against UKIP today, the usual barrage from the usual suspects (Telegraph / Mail / Times / BBC) with a bit of extra support from the useful idiots likes Guid0 and Toby Young.

    We can safely assume new funding from the EU propaganda unit must have just arrived and they have promised everyone double pay until the Euro elections are over. Lynton has probably matched this pay bonus for his own pro EU trolls.

    The problem is, we’ve heard it all before, and like the kid who cries wolf, the more we here of it, the less we care about these childish attacks.

    Yes, the p@edo PIE scandle for Labour sticks to them like sh1t.

    But this tittle tattle about expenses and the UKIP head office, it really is scraping the barrel even for the pro EU establishment and media in this country.

    It really does smack of desperation and even thicko plebs the UK public can see right through it.

  31. 31
    Jack D, wanting Black Rod urgentlyer says:

    Harman is an evil c-unting c-unt of the highest order.

    Comment of the year!

  32. 32
    Bill Quango MP says:

    They’ll be back in April. Start of the new financial year.

  33. 33
    C.O.Jones says:

    Didn’t Labour have a twitter tsar?

  34. 34
    Mr Woy says:

    I thought grooming for old ladies was illegal.

  35. 35
    Observant says:

    I would sooner see a vet put down HH and her ilk.

  36. 36
    Sheldon Cooper says:


  37. 37
    Wasp says:

    I didn’t sell any gold.

  38. 38
    MB. says:

    ‘PMQs SKETCH: Harriet Harman is Grooming the LibDems’

    Over 4, 10 or 14 year old Liberals?

  39. 39
    Universal Hissing says:

    They’ve been demoted to troll the Scottish indy debate.

  40. 40
    Moley says:

    The Telegraph is reporting hearsay as fact.

    The Telegraph has gone downhill without any brakes since their editorial changes.

    It doesn’t have any news coverage worth speaking of and is filling itself with Daily Mail type human (dis)interest crap which is not worth reading.

    I have to go foreign for Crimea coverage, (Der Spiegel English online, among others).

    Can we just take the antiUKIP line for granted, the Telegraph needn’t bother printing it and we needn’t bother ignoring it completely?

  41. 41
    Richard Timney for Jacqui says:

    Get a grip, Jack.

  42. 42
    Harriet Harman should be investegated by the police! Pedofile apologist. says:

    Great sketch. I get the anger! Harriet Harman is an utter túrd & should be investigated by the police. There is no place for that unapologetic pedo arselicker in politics.

    Who are the morally spineless thicko scum who keep voting these arsewipes in?

    As for her bullshit arguments? She is fooling no one except for the thicko labour voters.

  43. 43
    Nigel Garage says:


  44. 44
    Jack Ketch says:

    Vince. The only cable that the Pikeys haven’t stolen yet.

  45. 45
    Lord Rennard says:

    If women break through the glass ceiling, then we will be able to look up their skirts.

  46. 46
    Justin pussy foots in his Poofy boots! says:

    Good sketch. Makes Malcolm Tucker look like a pussy. Meow!

    Well done!

  47. 47
    Sir Roger de Senseless says:

    Cleggover’s at least thirty years too old for the old slapper, isn’t he?

  48. 48
    Justin pussyfoots in his Poofy boots. says:

    Typical two faced Labour. Labour are officially the Boggin’ Party.

    Labour are bunch of spineless Hunts trying rewrite history. I am thoroughly fed up with these leeching lefty scumbags.

  49. 49
    Displaced Brummie says:

    Was Harriet Harman taught her grooming techniques by her friends in PIE?

  50. 50
    Tom Catesby says:


  51. 51
    Tom Catesby says:

    He’s not plugged in so it will be quite safe.

  52. 52
    Tom Catesby says:

    The great British public, makes me feel proud.

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